I cradled our daughter in my arms, smiling down at her as she slept. It had only been a couple months since she was born, but our lives have changed so much… Kohiko was doing great though, and I healed quickly so there was no need for unnecessary… fasting.

I rocked, whispering to her as Kohiko busied himself in our little garden, trying to prove he had what he called a 'green thumb.' I had yet to see any of his efforts bear fruit…

I still couldn't believe that our little Owari lay snug in my arms, my little angel looking so much like me. Her little ears twitched as she dreamed, and her tail would poke itself out, looking for something to wrap around. My tanuki form was what I wore most commonly, especially at times like this, though I would still go out as an Oni.

I know it sounds strange, to care so much about such a thing, but… both are part of my identity, and though he might deny it, Oni Suruga was the one Kohiko fell for, though he made his adoration for my tanuki side well known.

There I go again… honestly, I don't know why I care so much, but I suppose it's only natural. I wonder what Owari will think when she's old enough to understand…

"I love you…" I leaned down and whispered to her, kissing her forehead as she slept. The rocking chair Kohiko had had made was marvelous. I closed my eyes for a moment…

"Here, let me hold her for a while, you need a rest," Kohiko said, rousing me from a light slumber.

I smiled and handed him his daughter. He smiled at her, kissing her cheek and cradling her in his arms as I stood up, trading places with him.

"Thank you, she's been a bit of a handful today," I admitted.

"Nothing we can't handle," Kohiko said, nuzzling me before he sat down. I hesitated for a moment, then bit his nose affectionately. I felt shy doing it, but he stroked my cheek with his free hand, smiling.

It was how I felt I could truly tell him just how much I loved him, not just as a lover, but as the father of our baby girl… When I saw him with her, I just… I just knew he would do anything for her.

"I'll go make us some tea," I said, favoring him with a small smile as he sat in the chair, cooing to Owari as she stirred in her sleep.

"That would be lovely, thank you," he said, not looking up from her face.

I prepared the tea in the kitchen, thinking about how much my instincts had changed, and though we may not have as much sex as we did before… what we had now was even more intense, as though the threat of it ending with Owari's cry somehow enhanced the passion.

They reminded us at the hospital that Owari would be our only child, that a kansen's wisdom cube could only share enough of itself for one and still remain intact. That was ok, she would have all of our love, always.

I felt my horns come back, and I smiled, happy to have most of my control back. I rubbed them gently as the tea brewed… I enjoyed the image they projected. I wanted to seem confident, self-assured… and while I was no longer the scared girl lashing out in self-defense against a lecherous Admiralty that abused shipgirls for their own enjoyment…

I still enjoyed the quiet, my home, with Kohiko and I, and now Owari… no undue stress, and no undue attention. We were just like any other couple… well, maybe not exactly like any other couple, but close enough.

The tea was ready. I brought it out to our living room to see Kohiko passed out, Owari held securely in his arms. I couldn't help but giggle, and set the tea on the table before gently lifting her up and setting her beside me on the tatami.

I stood up and leaned over him, kissing him awake. He smiled and got up, stretching before joining me again, Owari between the two of us. We enjoyed our afternoon tea, as he showed me an interesting article in the newspaper about the expanded capabilities of broadcast television.

In the city, television was common enough, but we never bothered out here thanks to generally poor reception outside of a small provincial station. Plus, I was news there more often than I wanted to be…

We lived in the… ah… Suruga Province. My ship, the IJN Suruga, and me, Suruga the kansen, lived in the Suruga province. Quite funny, apparently. They had built a slip to accommodate my ship, and no one protested it, to my surprise. Apparently they just enjoyed having me nearby.

The vessel brought in tourists, but I refused to let them traipse about my ship as though it were some kind of… ugh…

I refuse to finish that thought.

Anyway, it looked like we could get broadcast television from Tokyo now, so we decided to go to the store later today and finally purchase one.

"This is great," Kohiko said, sipping his tea. He always said it was great, though I suppose I can be a little immodest about my ability when it comes to tea ceremony and preparation…

Owari fussed a bit, so I set my cup down and picked her up, my mommy voice coming out as I cooed to her. She opened her eyes and looked at me, her little smile lighting up her face as I heard Kohiko make an aww sound.

"She looks hungry," Kohiko said.

"You just want to see my boobs," I scoffed, but he was right, so I took one out brought her to it, letting her feed.

"Tea and an excellent view. Could I have the other?" Kohiko teased me.

I swatted at him, "You are so lewd…"

"Oh, I know…" He raised his eyebrows. To be fair, I found out quite a while back that I was just as capable of being as lewd as he was…

"Well, of she gets her fill and has a nice deep sleep… you might just get what you're after~," I said, knowing damn well I wanted it just as much as he did.

"Deal!"

I wasted no time, kneeling down as Suruga finished stripping, kissing her trim midriff, tongue teasing her navel as she gasped softly.

"C-come on… we don't have time for this!" She protested, but I was enjoying it far too much. Her stomach never even looked like it had carried a child, but I chalked that up to her being a kansen.

Her scent had returned to as it was before, and since she was an Oni currently, it was a bit softer. I knew everything about my love, every inch of her body, the map of her scent… we had a beautiful little daughter, but Suru would always be my wife.

I stood up, and she hopped up onto the kitchen counter, spreading her legs to give me easy access.

"Just a few minutes," I asked her, already heading for it.

"Alright…" she giggled, and I thrust my tongue into her cunt, tasting her insides had become quite the treat, and it was one I fully intended to take advantage of! Her response was swift as she put her hands on my head, pressing my face further into her crotch, wanting my tongue as deep as possible.

I felt a primal need to make her cum like this, to taste her juices so thoroughly once again…

"Kohiko… Kohiko… I'm gonna… I'm gonna cum!" Suruga moaned as she expeditiously fulfilled my unspoken desire, a delicious cocktail of her juices slaking my ardent desire. I stood up and pressed my mouth to hers, pushing myself deep into her and thrusting fast, hoping to bring both of us to a quick orgasm at least once…

"Suru… Suru… just like that… you're squeezing me so tight!" I moaned as she worked the muscles in her cunt, biting her lip as she looked at me. Her cute moans came freely as she fought to keep her voice down.

"Good… good… oh gods… right there!" she moaned, putting her arms around my neck. I reached up, taking one of her soft breasts into my hand, squeezing it as my forehead rested against hers.

The lewd sounds of our lovemaking seemed so loud as we frantically reached another orgasm, my seed pouring into her womb as she stared at me with a lustful hunger.

"Haa… haa… I'm still… one more…" I said, and she looked through the door and nodded. I pulled out of her as she hopped off and turned around, showing me her ass.

"My ass, Kohiko, use my ass. It's been a while…" she reached back, spreading her cheeks apart and showing me her delicious anus. I couldn't help myself, and teased her a bit with my tongue, ringing the sensitive flesh as she moaned softly.

I rubbed my cock against her slit, her juices more than sufficient lubrication for anal. My tip entered her with ease as she relaxed.

"You must really want this…" I said, my cock disappearing inside of her as she gripped it with her rectum.

"Fuck me, Kohiko! Haa… you're the one that got me hooked on anal!" Suruga said, and I began to thrust, pulling her upright and biting her ear, my hands groping her breasts as she pushed back against me in time with my thrusts.

Things were a bit intense, but all was quiet and we wanted to take full advantage of the situation while we could!

"You like, Suru? You like having your ass spread open? My cock is gonna fill you up!" I moaned, pinching her nipples lightly.

"Your cock is amazing! Fill my bowels, Kohiko… pour everything you have into me! I want it all…" Suru moaned, and I thrust hard, my climax sneaking up on me. I filled her insides with my seed, hot threads of cum shooting into her bowels as she shivered in climax.

I didn't stop there, however, and continued to thrust, knowing that I had one more left in me. We slowly moved to the floor where she rested her head on her arms as I shift my position, kneeling over her and pushing my cock back inside her ass, thrusting deep into her.

"So deep… I can feel it in my stomach!" Suruga panted as I fucked her silly, a week's worth of lust and desire channeling itself into this moment. I would fill her ass to the brim!

I fucked her like that until I was limp, my cum leaking from her ass as she tried to close it. A pile of drool was on the floor beneath her head, and when I pulled her up, she hugged me tightly.

"Oh, gods… I needed that…" she said.

Owari had miraculously stayed quiet this entire time, and stayed asleep until after we had a quick bath, cleaning ourselves up.

Our lovemaking was quick and dirty, but I'll be damned if it wasn't as exciting and fulfilling as ever!

Kii swept up Owari into her arms, the infant giggling as her aunt kissed her. Suruga hugged the both of them, nuzzling her sister as Kii fawned over her niece.

"She is gorgeous, and such a lovely name, too!" Kii returned Suruga's hug with one arm. Fortunately, Suruga had prepared tea prior to Kii's arrival and I went into the kitchen and gathered it up, bringing it to the living room and setting it out.

My sister-in-law cradled Owari as we sat around the table, Suruga sighing and getting close to me, enjoying whatever time we could get to ourselves.

"We're so glad you could make it. I head the JNOF has been busy lately?" I said, Suruga leaning her head on my shoulder and closing her eyes.

"She looks exhausted, she's been keeping you up?" Kii asked.

"She just needs a few minutes. How is the fleet?" I pressed.

Kii smiled, "Well, it's just a brief visit to the Eagle Union for our annual exercises with their fleet. Did you know Cleveland and Helena got married?"

"We got their card, and the picture. They're a cute couple," I said, taking a sip of my tea, "We set up the guest room for you. I wasn't sure how long you'd stay…"

"As long as you want, please," Suruga opened her eyes, her tone wistful.

"I can spend a couple weeks here, I am the boss after all heh~, you never told me how nice it is to be in charge of your own fleet…" Kii joked.

Suruga snorted, "Oh yeah, nothing like long hours and stress…" she had a hint of pride in her voice. She never lost a kansen, and she deserved to feel good about that! "Seriously though, that would be amazing…"

"Plus, if you two want to do something tonight, I'm sure I could keep Owari entertained for a bit… she is a Kii class after all!" Kii laughed.

"No arguing that," I said, "though she takes after her mother the most."

"These cute little ears… and this tail! It keeps wrapping itself around my arm," Kii said. Suruga blushed a little. "You still hiding your ears, Suru?"

"Not anymore… but I feel comfortable with my horns. That's what everyone expects to see, too. Kohiko likes them though…" Suru turned her head up to me.

"As he should!" Kii chuckled, looking at me.

"Say, Kii… normally ships of the same class have the same characteristics. Why are you a kitsune and Suruga a tanuki? Or… did you choose to appear as a kitsune?" I asked, intrigued. Suruga looked at Kii as well, my questioned mirrored in her expression.

She contemplated us for a moment, shaking her head, "Hmm, I guess you'll never know~."

Suruga scoffed, "Hey, I'm not ashamed of my tanuki form or anything, Onee-san!"

"Prove it!"

In a flash, Suruga's tanuki form appeared, and she wrapped her tail possessively around me. I reached up and rubbed her ears as she closed her eyes and smiled. Kii watched her closely, shaking her head.

"Incredible… Kohiko, you must truly love each other. I suppose I am the outlier of the Kii class then, because as far as I know, I have always been a kitsune. If I am anything else, even I do not know," Kii leaned back, Owari nestled up against her bosom.

Suruga shook her head, "I don't mind going out like this, but I've spent so much time as an Oni that it's just part of my identity. I'll prove it to you though, I'll go out like this, tonight!"

Kii shrugged, but her smile said it all.

It was quite warm, so Suruga's tail and ears were out on display. I could sense her nervousness as we walked, though few actually paid us any mind. They were used to seeing us by now, so a slight detail like this would likely go unnoticed…

"Hi, Suruga!" A little kid waved at her, and she waved back as we stopped.

"I'm so sorry, he always talks about you two…" his mother said, embarrassed.

"It's no problem at all," I reassured her.

"Why do you have ears and a tail?" The kid asked. Suruga went pink.

"This is… I'm a…" She stammered.

"She's a kansen, remember?" I told him, giving him a wink. His face lit up at our implied secret, and he nodded.

"Yes, sir!" He responded.

His mother dragged him off, Suruga remaining rooted to the spot.

"You ok?" I asked her.

"Y-yeah, I guess so, hehe…" she laughed nervously, and we moved on. Her tail brushed against my leg as she held me closer, wrapping her arms around mine.

It was a busy night, but no one stopped us again. We made it to the restaurant and placed our order. The waitress had the good tact to not acknowledge any difference, even though Suruga's ears twitched cutely as she tried to get a handle on her emotions.

"Sake?" I poured her some from the bottle, and she happily accepted, sipping it, visibly relaxing as the alcohol took effect. I sipped my own, a pleasant warming sensation sliding down my throat and filling my stomach.

"It doesn't seem so bad, now…" she said as I refilled her glass. The bottle was soon finished, and I waved the waitress over, asking for a couple of highballs to be brought out with our meal. Those were followed by more of those, and then dessert yuzu, and by the time we were on our way home we were quite tipsy.

The streets had emptied, and it was just the two of us as we made our way home.

"I love you, my tanuki~," I said to her, caressing her ears.

"N-not here!" she giggled, but pushed her head against my hand. "I love you too…"

The two of us were being silly, I knew, but it felt so nice, to have time together. It felt like such a… luxury! I mean, we discussed getting a nanny to help us but… Owari was a kansen, or at least part kansen.

Kii was waiting for us when we returned, a finger to her lips. She whispered, "Owari is asleep in the guest room. I'll sleep with her tonight, so enjoy yourselves, ok?" She winked.

"Thank you, Kii…" Suruga said, hugging her sister before the three of us retired to our respective rooms, though Suruga peeked in on Owari first, her motherly instincts sobering her up long enough to make sure our daughter was nestled comfortably in her crib.

We well used the time Kii gave us!

Honestly, we spent most of it asleep.

Most of it…

Owari twirled in front of the mirror, admiring herself, and the yukata Musashi sent her. It was made of the finest silk I've ever seen, and a larger version was waiting for me. Kohiko came in and smiled at us, lured in by the sounds of Owari's ecstatic giggles.

"Mommy, Daddy! It's so pretty!" Her ears twitched as her tail poked out from beneath it. Kohiko picked her up, kissing her cheek.

"Not as pretty as you are!" He said, putting her down after a hug.

I stood up, undressing and getting to work, putting on my yukata, Kohiko helping me as Owari watched. He nuzzled my neck as he finished the back. I couldn't believe that our little girl was already five, and that she was going to the summer festival.

"Kohiko, that tickles…" I said, giggling as his lips brushed against me.

"I know you have nothing on under there…" he said.

"Mmm… you better behave, or else you won't get to see what's under it later~," I teased him.

"Mommy, are you gonna be an Oni tonight? Can I be an Oni too?" Owari looked up at me, and I shook my head, switching.

"I thought this would be nicer, plus you're still learning," I said, and picked her up turning to Kohiko. "How do we look?"

"Like a dream. I don't know which one of you to love more!" He said, and I couldn't help but smile. I turned to Owari and bit her nose gently. She did the same to me, and Kohiko made an adoring noise.

We were ready to head out, and Owari walked between us, her hands in ours as we joined the steady stream of people headed to the festival.

"Mommy, why do you want to be an Oni too?" Owari asked out of nowhere.

"A long time ago I had a reason to be one, but your daddy taught me to appreciate this form, too," I explained.

"Cause Daddy loves you?"

"I sure do, my little tanuki. Now, what candy do you want?" Kohiko interjected.

"Oh! Um… ikayaki! Wait, maybe… takoyaki first? Ooh, maybe…" Owari looked like she was about ready to drool.

I squeezed her hand, "I think it'll be ok if you have whatever you like tonight, right, Kohiko?" I looked at my husband, who nodded. We passed through the gates and went into the festival proper, eating a little too much, having a couple drinks and just enjoying our night. There were plenty of kids Owari's age, and they came up to us, begging for her to come play with them. There were a couple parents with them, and after we made sure she'd be ok, and that she'd come find us before the fireworks started, that she could go play with her friends.

"You know, I was worried," I confided in Kohiko, "I thought for sure she would be ostracized or mocked for her ears, but the other kids treat her as though she were no different."

"That's because she is no different," Kohiko responded, "she's just a little girl who wants to have fun. Plus, she's kansen. You've seen how strong she is for her age."

I nodded, "It is nice to hear it, now, would you like another highball?"

"You know it!"

We went and procured a couple more drinks, though we were shortly ambushed by the group of kids in the festival square. Owari was leading them, trying to convince them of something. They came up to us, and Owari tugged on my hand.

"Mommy, you have to show them! They think that all the kansen have their rigging taken away if they aren't fighting anymore!" Owari pleaded.

I froze. I'd never outright shown my rigging in public, and I was worried it might give the wrong idea…

Not to mention the insane amount of attention it would draw to me!

I sighed and looked at Kohiko, and he nodded, getting people to back up, making an excuse about showing the kids something. It took a minute, the area required for me to safely deploy my massive battleship rigging was not insubstantial.

"Alright, Owari…" I acquiesced, and looked at the group. The square had fallen silent, and I realized with no small amount of embarrassment that I was in fact the center of attention. I smiled for the kids, letting my horns take over and then willing my rigging to me.

It had been some time, but it came as easily as ever, and the cries of surprise and delight actually made me feel good as the kids admired my guns.

"See? I told you!" Owari turned to one of her friends and stuck out her nose. The friend ignored her, staring at my guns.

"I never doubted it but... To actually see it…" One of the adult bystanders said, their tone awestruck.

Kohiko was smiling, though I kept noticing him inspecting my rigging. Old habits…

"To think her husband led an entire fleet of them…"

"Actually, Suruga and I both led the fleet. She is actually the one responsible for ensuring the safety of every kansen under out command," Kohiko said, and I blushed.

"It's ok, Kohiko…" I complained.

"Now isn't the time to be modest, Suru," he said.

"So big!"

"So cool!"

The kids were loving it, but it had already been long enough. I willed it away, letting my tanuki form slip back as well, "Did your friends think it was cool?"

Owari nodded as she rejoined us.

"Very cool! Thanks Mommy!" She gave me a big hug, and we went and got her an ikayaki before making our way to the hill to watch the fireworks.

Owari screamed in delight as they exploded overhead. Her eyes lit up with the excitement that only a child could feel. Kohiko had lifted her up to his shoulders so she could see the show clearly, and watching her carefree happiness… I was so grateful she had the chance to enjoy all of this.

I may have come into this world as a kansen, a young woman armed with enough firepower to turn the tide of battle… but…

Owari deserved this. She could have the childhood I never did. Yet, I was grateful to have the life I do, childhood or not.

When the show was over, we started making our way home; the stalls closing as the vendors sold the last of their wares. Owari was exhausted, and Kohiko ended up carrying her, her head on his shoulder as we walked back.

She was out like a light, so Kohiko and I had plenty of time to indulge in each other. Apparently, seeing me in a yukata got him going pretty well~.

I looked over the student report Owari presented us with. Perfect grades, as usual. She had her mother's keen mind and intellect, and my skills for staying out of trouble. I gave her a hug, patting one of the horns on her head.

"Excellent work, Owari! I see you've mastered the art of looking like Mom, too!" I said.

She was the spitting image of her mother, and although I didn't think the horns were necessary for Owari, my daughter loved her Mother's horns, and wanted to have the same ability. She normally relaxed at home, much like Suruga, but she had yet to switch today.

"As we promised," Suruga smiled and handed Owari a wrapped parcel. Owari looked overjoyed and went to her room to set it up.

Suruga handed me a cup of tea, "I can't believe they finally opened up MilNet. They're even calling it the Internet, and it's supposed to be available worldwide very soon. I'm glad Musashi had a dedicated line brought to our home."

I nodded, "It is amazing. Completely free, too. I'm sure we don't have any access to anything on the MilNet side, but I guess we could get a computer for ourselves."

Suruga thought for a moment, and I looked up at her. She was approaching middle-age, but she was more beautiful than ever. Sure, a few lines here and there, but they were all memories, and ones we had made together, and with Owari.

"Sure, if you'd like. I don't think we need anything like hers, though!" Suruga laughed, and I chuckled in agreement.

Owari ended up teaching us how to use it, her patience extraordinary. She was very interested when I told her about the old MilNet terminals I used to use all the time, and how the entire network was heavily guarded.

"Wait, you mean to tell me you used to have to carry around a folio?" She asked. I went and found my old leather folio, opening it up and showing her my access and auth codes, explaining what each one did and certain addresses I wrote down. She looked at it, amazed.

"Yeah, there weren't a lot of satellites at the time, so we had to wait and spool a message up to the relay for the next window."

"That's crazy! Mom, you saw this too?"

"Oh, quite a bit…" Suruga said.

"Oh, hey! Looks like you already have a message from someone. Wait… is this right? Musashi? Like, the military chair, the kansen Musashi?" Owari's voice filled with awe.

Suruga and I both nodded, "That's right. What does it say?" Suruga asked.

Owari skimmed it and relayed the gist, "You'll want to read it yourselves, but it looks like she's inviting us to Tokyo. Please tell me we can go?"

"Of course," I responded, "In fact, I feel it isn't entirely optional."

We responded with an affirmative, and it was in Tokyo that we discovered that Owari was a full-fledged kansen. Though, she freaked out a bit the first time she manifested her rigging. She also did it with no physical ship!

"Um, Mom… Dad…" She called out, and her tone instantly alerted us that something was wrong. She was stuck in her room in the suite, her rigging pressed against each wall as she struggled to control her breathing. Her guns were tracking as well.

"It's ok, Owari, it's ok… just take deep breaths…" Suruga said as we entered the room. Owari tried, looking at me. I went up to her and hugged her tightly, her arms gripping me as well.

"You're ok, it'll go away soon, you just need to think about it leaving you," I said, stroking her hair as she stopped shaking. Suddenly, the room felt emptier and Owari was crying.

"What if it happens again? Or in school?" She sniffed.

"We'll help you get it under control. This is completely new, Owari! You're the first kansen to discover her rigging through maturity instead of being born directly into a combat role!" Suruga said, her excitement plain.

Owari had been talking about going to the Naval Academy here in Tokyo, and when we were having dinner at the palace with Musashi, she offered Owari the chance to attend.

"I may choose one person every year to attend the academy, though you will need to continue to do well until you graduate, at which point I expect you to do even better. You are, after all, there with my blessing," Musashi explained.

Owari stood and bowed deeply, "Musashi-san, I am humbled and honored by your generosity and confidence."

Suruga and I exchanged a glance that conveyed what each of us was feeling. This had something to do with Yamato, but we never broke our end of the deal. Musashi and Suruga talked privately after dinner over tea while I helped coach Owari with her rigging in the palace gardens.

"You've got it… now, you know how you summon your Oni form? Your rigging is exactly the same thing, for all intents and purposes. Now, just think… very good!" It took a while, but she was getting the hang of it by the time Suruga came back.

"Wow! Dad sure is good with this stuff," Owari said to Suruga as her mother returned.

"I would hope so, after all the years he worked with an entire fleet of them," she smiled and turned to me, "Musashi and I have… reviewed our agreement. Nothing much has changed, but she wanted to make sure that Owari is officially considered a Kii-class battleship."

"I don't see an issue with that," I replied.

Suruga nodded, "I hate politics, too much fluff around what's important for my taste. Her car is waiting for us, though I figured we could go check out that place Owari is always going on about."

"Wait, really? We can go to Akihabara?" Her eyes lit up, and I shrugged.

"Sure!"

There was a store there that was nothing but kansen stuff, and when Suruga saw the life-sized statue of herself, she went beet red. When the store owner saw Suruga staring at the life-sized statue of herself, he nearly fainted.

"It's… you! In my store! This is… oh my goodness, your daughter! This must make you Kohiko!" He turned to me, then back to Suruga and bowed, "I am honored, truly! Please let me know if you need help finding anything!"

I expressed my thanks, and Owari took her time looking around, settling on a few small things and, to my amusement, a small figure of Suruga. I thought my wife would object, but she almost seemed a little proud.

Owari must have always seen her mother as her hero, and that was by far the sweetest thing I could imagine.

Suruga was a hit, and her daughter even more so. No one spared the chance to look, or even have a quick word with, the most famous kansen in the world. I felt suddenly very protective of my daughter and stuck by her side unless we were in a store.

"She's not going to disappear," Suruga joked.

"I know, but it feels so strange to have everyone recognize you. I'm even more surprised you're ok with it."

"I've grown somewhat used to it, though this is wearing on me. You owe me after we get back to the hotel. I know Owari will be busy with her stuff and her computer, so I think we need a little time to ourselves," she suggested.

"I'm always in the mood to spend time with you," I said.

We continued to accompany our daughter while she ran from store to store, and when she finally had her fill, we made our way back to the hotel. Owari was so busy with her finds that she promised she wouldn't leave the hotel.

Suruga and I sat against one another at a bar, and even after all these years, she was still my best friend. Also, life-sized Suruga statue. Heh. I almost wanted to buy it, but she'd kill me. Just set it up right out front…

Nah, I wouldn't torment my poor wife like that. I only bought a little one when she wasn't looking.