Content Notes: Past child abuse and neglect (discussed), past sexual abuse (discussed), minor canon character death.
A special thanks to my beta reader EmeraldSnakes who has spent the past two months listening to me chatter about my fic and Harry Potter, and who graciously has edited this fic.
This fic updates on Saturdays and is cross-posted on AO3.
Gemma's predictions proved correct and over the next six weeks they spent their time in the hallways on guard and huddled together with the rest of the Slytherin first years. A silent yet vicious inter-House war had broken out. The Gryffindors blamed the Slytherins for getting two of their seventh years suspended, the Slytherins blamed the Gryffindors for attacking Rachel. News of the attack spread quickly and for once the Hufflepuffs and the Ravenclaws sided with the Slytherins.
Rachel and her friends weren't attacked directly, but for the sake of all of them they decided to only talk to Hermione and Neville when they were in their study room or when they visited Hagrid. Theo said it was safer if none of them were branded as House traitors.
By the start of May the weather had warmed up and the trees were just starting to turn green along their branches. This made visiting Hagrid much more pleasant.
On Sunday mid-morning they made the familiar trek down to Hagrid's house and knocked on his door.
"There you lot are," Hagrid said, opening his door and allowing Fang to bound out to greet them.
Fang jumped around Millie and Neville before turning to Rachel to lick her face.
"Hello Hagrid," Hermione said. "Sorry we didn't get to see you last week. Our study schedules are intense. We only have six weeks until exams!"
"I'm sure you'll do well," Hagrid said, smiling down at them. "Come on in for a cup of tea."
They filed into Hagrid's house and sat around his table, Rachel happily petting Fang.
"How's things going with your classes?" Hagrid asked as he filled his kettle.
"Intense is about the right word for it," Theo said.
"Very intense," Neville added glumly. "We're studying Incendio in Charms, and I can barely make a little flame no matter how much I practice."
"You'll get it," Millie said. "It took me two weeks before I could light a fire in a fireplace."
"And we just finished studying and brewing the Forgetfulness Potion, and we're about to start the Pompion Potion," Hermione added. "And of course we've been revising for exams. They're only six weeks away."
"We know, Hermione," Millie said wearily.
Hermione had been keeping a running countdown of how long they had until exams since the start of April.
"Not to worry, Hermione," Hagrid said kindly. "The way you all study, you'll be at the top of your class."
"I'll settle for not failing," Neville said.
"No you won't," Hermione said, glaring at Neville. "You are not stupid and you're not bad at magic. Don't listen to them."
"Someone giving you trouble, Neville?" Hagrid asked.
Neville shook his head. "No one thinks I can do spells. And I'll never be as good as my mother and father were."
"Your mother and father did well for themselves, I knew them back in the day," Hagrid said, sitting down next to Neville. "The last thing they'd want is for you to be worrying that you're not as good as they were. You'll be a fine wizard, these things take time. And how about this, I'll tell you a secret."
"A secret?" Neville asked, looking up at Hagrid.
"I knew your grandmother back in the day too, and she failed her Charms OWL. So don't let her be telling you what makes a good wizard," Hagrid said.
Neville looked stunned.
"Neville, you do well on your essays and your spell casting is improving. With the pace that Hermione has us studying at, you'll be more than ready by the time exams arrive," Theo said, patting Neville on the shoulder.
Hagrid got up and poured them all tea. "That's right, I meant to show you. Charlie Weasley sent me a letter. He took a photo of Norberta," he said, setting aside the kettle and going to fetch the letter and photograph.
They passed the letter and photograph around. Norberta - the name Hagrid had given the dragon that hatched from his egg - was now about the same size as Fang and was breathing fire. Rachel thought the dragon was kind of cute, but was glad it was at the dragon reserve instead of in Hagrid's house.
They were just finishing their tea when Hagrid turned to them, his expression uncharacteristically serious. "Now, I want you to promise me you'll stay out of the Forbidden Forest," he said, meeting each of their gazes.
"We already do, Hagrid. It's forbidden," Hermione said.
"Well, keep staying out. It's not safe in there," Hagrid said.
"More not safe than usual?" Millie asked.
"I just found another dead unicorn last night. I don't know what's killing them. Not much can," Hagrid said.
"Oh no," Millie said. "That's so sad."
Rachel agreed with her. She hadn't seen a unicorn yet, but she wanted to.
"You don't know what's killing them?" Theo asked.
Hagrid shook his head. "Never seen anything like it. But I don't want you running into whatever it is out there."
Each of them nodded. Going into the Forbidden Forest at any point seemed like a bad idea, but even more so now.
"Although it's an interruption to our study schedule, I think it's important to at least look into this," Hermione said as they made their way to their study room carrying books about unicorns they'd just checked out from the library.
"Even though the staff is undoubtedly looking into it too?" Theo asked.
"I'm sure the professors can handle it, but it's not likely they're giving it their full attention," Hermione reasoned. "And, if we can help Hagrid figure out what it is, maybe he can stop it from killing more unicorns."
Rachel nodded. She didn't want more unicorns to die.
"I'm going to look through the section on the Forbidden Forest in Hogwarts: A History and make a list of what is said to be living in the Forest. I suggest the rest of you see if you can figure out what the natural predators for unicorns are, and then we can cross reference our lists," Hermione said, opening the door to the study room.
They went inside and took their usual places around the table. Rachel liked how homey the study room felt. It was a place just for them and she felt more at ease here than she did just about anywhere else.
Rachel opened the book she had found that had a section on unicorns and began taking notes. The more she read about them, the more she wanted to see them. Their babies were gold, the adolescents were silver, and then the full grown adults were white. They didn't grow their horns until they were about four years old. There was a picture of two white unicorns standing with their golden foal and Rachel closed her eyes for a moment and imagined what it must be like to pet one. She'd never seen a horse up close, but she imagined it must be a little bit like that, but better.
She also learned that unicorns were very fast and could outrun most creatures, including humans and werewolves. There were small herds of unicorns that were raised by magizoologists, and they collected their tail hair for use as wand cores and took shavings from their horns to be used as potions ingredients.
"Listen to this," Neville said abruptly. "To kill a unicorn is considered a grave sin. Drinking unicorn blood will save your life, even if you are on death's door, but you will live a cursed life from the moment the blood touches your lips. It is better to die than it is to live with the curse of having slain something pure and defenseless."
Theo broke the resulting silence. "I assume you're all thinking what I'm thinking."
Rachel nodded. Someone would have to be truly desperate to drink unicorn blood, someone like the Dark Lord.
"You-Know-Who is drinking it for the same reason he wants the Philosopher's Stone, to get his power back," Millie said somberly.
"Which means that he's already past the wards on the grounds," Hermione said. "Should we tell someone? Professor Snape or Professor McGonagall maybe?"
"As long as Hagrid has reported the unicorn deaths, I think they already know," Theo said. "They would know all of this without having to look it up in the library."
"Then why aren't they doing something?" Neville asked. "If You-Know-Who is in the Forbidden Forest, shouldn't they be calling the aurors?"
"No, because the aurors believe that You-Know-Who is dead and gone," Millie said. "But, what if they're trying to trap him? Then they could really kill him for good."
"You think they're luring him here, to Hogwarts, with the Philosopher's Stone?" Hermione asked, looking horrified.
Rachel swallowed hard. That was terrible to think about. Would Professor Dumbledore really do that?
"The castle has additional wards on it, doesn't it? In addition to the wards on the grounds?" Theo asked.
Hermione nodded. "Throughout the years most of the Headmasters and some of the staff have added to the wards on the castle, and to those on the grounds. Hogwarts is one of the safest places in Britain."
"I think we have to believe that they know the Dark Lord is out there. And they obviously know he wants the Stone, or they wouldn't be guarding it. In fact, I bet Fluffy isn't the only thing guarding it," Theo said, getting up to look out the window. The windows looked out on the grounds and the forest. "There's no way Professor Dumbledore would risk You-Know-Who coming into the castle itself. The entire Ministry and Wizengamot would call for his removal as soon as word got out."
"But that doesn't change the fact that he's here, in the forest," Neville said, joining Theo at the window.
"But he can't get in here. Or at the very least he's having a hard time doing so," Theo reasoned. "If the Dark Lord could get in, he'd be in already. So whatever they're doing to keep him out is working. Maybe they're going to try to capture him in the forest."
Hermione sighed. "This doesn't feel right."
"What do you mean? You don't think You-Know-Who is the one killing the unicorns?" Millie asked.
"No, I think he is. Nothing I read about in Hogwarts: A History suggests that there is anything else that lives in the Forest that is quick enough or strong enough to kill a unicorn. But You-Know-Who is the most dangerous wizard since Grindelwald," Hermione said, her gaze fixed on the window. "Surely the staff should be doing something if he's out there. This is a school. No one here can defend themselves against him."
Neville nodded.
Rachel wrote on the bottom of the piece of parchment she'd been taking notes on. 'Professor Dumbledore is supposed to be the one person the Dark Lord is afraid of. Maybe he knows for sure that the Dark Lord won't approach Hogwarts while he's here?'
Millie read the note and then passed it to Hermione. "Maybe. Especially while he's in a cursed and weakened state," Millie said.
"Maybe," Hermione said. "But I still don't like it."
Rachel didn't either, but she didn't see that there was anything they could do about it.
"How is school going?" Torey asked as she set up the pieces for them to play parcheesi.
'Okay. We only have five weeks now until exams. We've already started studying, but it's a lot,' Rachel wrote out and then handed the piece of paper to Torey.
"What do you mean by 'it's a lot'?" Torey asked.
Rachel thought about that. It was true that there was a lot of material for them to cover, but that wasn't really what she had meant. 'Hermione is really worried about doing well on the exams. She's drawn up study schedules and everything,' she finally wrote.
Torey read the note and then looked at Rachel. "Why do you think Hermione is worried? You've told me that she's usually at the top of the class."
That was a good question. Hermione always got the best score on her essays and tests and she was usually the first person in class to be able to perform a spell. Rachel thought about how some of the other kids called Hermione a know-it-all, and the way that some of the pure-blood students ignored Hermione or made fun of her. 'I think it's because she wants to prove that she belongs at Hogwarts. That she can do as well as the pure-bloods who have been brought up with magic. I don't think it will help though,' Rachel wrote.
"Because pure-blood prejudice isn't about ability," Torey said, nodding. "Hermione is already showing that she can do magic just as well as the pure-bloods, but getting good grades isn't going to convince them that what they believe about muggleborns is wrong."
Rachel nodded. 'Not all pure-bloods are like that though. Theo and Neville are our friends and they don't have a problem that Hermione is a muggleborn.'
"I'm glad that they're your friends. And you're right. Not everyone holds the same prejudices and not everyone has the same background," Torey said. "How are you feeling about the upcoming tests?"
Rachel played with the pen, not wanting to answer, but knowing that she should.
"Do exams usually make you nervous?" Torey asked.
Rachel shook her head and began to write. 'They didn't matter in the past. The Dursleys didn't care about what my grades were. They didn't even notice.'
Torey read the note. "But they matter now?"
Rachel nodded. 'Professor Snape is a teacher. He'll care about what my grades are.'
"And, since being at Hogwarts, you usually get good grades, don't you?" Torey asked.
Rachel nodded again.
"So why are these exams different?" Torey pressed.
Rachel fiddled with the pen again and finally began to write. 'I can't do magic. I spent months learning about non-verbal magic and I still can't do it. In Charms and Transfiguration, part of the exam is practical. I can't pass them.'
"Non-verbal magic is difficult. I don't know of anyone who has gone directly to using non-verbal magic from not using magic at all," Torey said.
'If I don't pass my exams I'm probably going to be expelled,' Rachel wrote, her hand cramping because she was holding the pen so tightly.
"I don't think that's likely," Torey said. "They know you can't speak right now, surely they'll have made some accommodations. I think I know a good way to find out."
Rachel raised her eyebrows.
"Why don't we ask Professor Snape? And that way we can find out what arrangements have been made. And if arrangements haven't been made yet, there's still time for him to make them," Torey said.
Rachel looked at the door that led out into the waiting room.
"Would it be okay if we invited him in and we can ask him now?" Torey asked.
Rachel thought about it and then nodded. She felt it was better to know now instead of waiting until she had actually taken the tests.
Torey stood up and went to open the door. "Severus, could you join us for a moment please?"
Professor Snape walked into the room and Rachel quickly got to her feet from where she'd been sitting on the ground.
"Is there a problem?" he asked, looking at Rachel before looking at Torey.
"Why don't we sit down for a moment, if you wouldn't mind. Rachel had a question and I thought it was best we get it sorted out sooner rather than later," Torey said, sitting down in her office chair.
Rachel sat down on the couch and a moment later Professor Snape sat down next her.
"Rachel is concerned that she will be expelled from Hogwarts if she fails her exams since she can't speak to do the practical exams in Charms and Transfiguration. Have alternative arrangements been made for these exams so Rachel can still participate?" Torey asked.
"Rachel will not be able to pass those two classes without being able to perform the spells required, however, that will not result in her expulsion. I've requested that Rachel be allowed to retake the practical portion of her exams once she is able to speak," Professor Snape explained.
Rachel leaned forward and began to write again. 'Can't you just do magic and make me talk?'
Torey took the piece of paper and shook her head. "There aren't any spells or potions that can make you talk outside of something like the Imperius Curse or Veritaserum."
'Why can't we use those?' Rachel wrote.
Severus leaned forward to read what Rachel had written before she passed it to Torey. "Because the Imperius Curse is illegal and places you completely under the control of the caster. Veritaserum is a truth potion. You would speak to truthfully answer questions asked of you, but it would not be of your own free will," he explained.
"Neither would be helpful," Torey said. "Speaking is just going to take some time and practice. Have you been trying to whisper to yourself while you're alone?"
Rachel nodded, but leaned forward again to write. 'It doesn't work. I can't get any words to come out.'
"Have you been mouthing words to yourself, like you're speaking silently?" Torey asked.
Rachel nodded again, but her shoulders slumped. It seemed completely hopeless.
"Keep doing that, it's a step in the right direction. And keep trying to whisper when you're alone. You will get there, it's just going to take time," Torey said. "Look how comfortable you've gotten with writing things down when you're around other people. That's a huge improvement to where you were six months ago."
Rachel supposed that was true, but it wasn't talking. It wasn't casting spells.
"You will get there," Professor Snape echoed. "Don't worry about the practical exams. Study for the parts that you can do. I have no doubts that you will do well in my class."
"And you don't have to worry about being expelled either," Torey said. "Hopefully that will take some of the pressure off while you're studying."
It did, a little, but she didn't like the feeling of going into an exam knowing she was going to fail and that there was nothing she could do about it.
"I've drawn up new study schedules," Hermione said as they settled into the study room on Wednesday, just after they got out of classes for the day. "Unfortunately it removes our independent research time, but since we're reviewing in both Charms and Defense, our time spent on homework for those two classes can align with our study schedule.
Rachel glanced down at the piece of parchment she'd been handed. Hermione's handwriting was tiny. She had listed out the subjects and all of the major topics in each that they'd covered that year, as well as a rotating schedule so that they could cover two topics per study session.
"Are you sure you've fit everything in there?" Theo asked, looking up from the schedule.
"Do you see something I've missed?" Hermione asked, sounding panicked.
"I'm joking," Theo said. "Try to calm down. We're already in a good position for these exams. We have our graded essays and tests from the whole year to use as study material and we've studied more than anyone else in our year, including the Ravenclaws."
'You'll do well. Don't worry about what other people are going to think of your exams. You know the materials and we'll review it with your schedule,' Rachel wrote out and then passed to Hermione.
Hermione nodded. "You're both right. We will do well. All of us. We study hard and we know the material."
"That's right," Millie said with determination. She looked at Neville. "All of us will do well."
Neville smiled. "I actually have some good news."
"Well don't just say that, tell us what it is," Theo said, smiling back at Neville.
"Professor Flitwick kept me after class today. He thinks one of the reasons I'm struggling so much with casting charms is that my wand core isn't compatible with me," Neville said.
"But it worked when you were at Ollivanders?" Hermione asked.
Neville shook his head. "I didn't go to Ollivanders. This is my father's wand. My Gran gave it to me when I got my Hogwarts letter. This wand has a dragon heartstring core. Professor Flitwick says that I would probably do better with a wand with a core of unicorn hair. He's going to write my Gran and ask if I can get a new wand over the summer."
"That's great," Millie said. "I bet when you get a new wand your incendio will be big enough to start a forest fire."
"Well, hopefully not," Hermione said with a smile. "But I do hope it helps. Is passing down wands a tradition then?"
"Most pure-blooded families keep the wands that are in their families, though some people prefer to be buried with theirs. When a child turns eleven, they try out the family wands and see if they're compatible with any of them, if not, then they go to Ollivanders," Theo explained, and then glanced at Neville. "Sometimes families can get a little overly attached to the idea of a child using a family wand, though it really is best to get a fresh wand that has only ever belonged to you."
Rachel wrote down her question and passed it to Neville. 'Do you think your Gran is likely to let you get a new wand?'
"I think she will let me get a new one, especially if I do well on exams and if Professor Flitwick writes her. If I just asked her, she'd probably say no, but it's different if a professor says that I need a different wand, because they would really know," Neville said.
"Let us know if she gives you any trouble. There's an Ollivanders branch in Hogsmeade. I bet we could sneak out there to get you a new wand if we had to," Millie said.
"Sneak out of the school?" Hermione asked. She looked as though Millie had just suggested they murder someone.
"Well third years and up get to go to Hogsmeade on special weekends. I bet we could slip out with them. If we had to. For a good cause," Millie said.
Rachel wasn't so sure about the sneaking out of the school part. She quickly wrote out another note, this time for the whole table. 'If it comes to it, I can ask Professor Snape to take Neville to Hogsmeade to get a new wand.'
"That," Theo said, nodding at Rachel's note. "Or we could figure out a way to do it during the summer. You could go together to pick up school supplies and then slip out for ice cream at Fortescue's, and then go to Ollivanders while you go to get ice cream."
"I like those plans better than sneaking out," Hermione said with a firm nod.
"I don't think it will be a problem. But thank you," Neville said.
"About this summer," Theo said, looking uncomfortable. "I need to tell you something."
"Okay," Millie said, when he didn't continue.
"Hermione, remember how you asked me if I had a problem with half-bloods and muggleborns?" Theo asked.
Hermione nodded.
"I don't. But my father does. A big problem. And he's not going to like that I'm friends with any of you," Theo explained.
"Even Neville?" Hermione asked.
"He considered families like the Longbottoms and the Weasleys to be blood traitors. I'll have to tell him about the study group. He'll hear about it from other people if I don't, and it's better if I'm the one to frame it. I'm going to explain it as I'm using your group to get good grades, because you're the best study group in our year, but that I'm not friends with any of you. So, I can't come visit, or have you to visit my place. And it's probably better if you don't send letters," Theo said, his shoulders slumped. "I just thought you should know in advance."
"That's awful. But don't worry about the letters, I have a plan for that," Hermione said with a firm nod.
"A plan?" Theo asked, sounding worried.
"I will send you a package. Just say you Owl Ordered a book. I'll even have them send it directly to you from the shop so it looks official," Hermione said.
"Okay, but nothing suspicious looking," Theo warned.
"Nothing suspicious," Hermione promised.
Rachel smiled. It sounded like Hermione was going to get Theo a two-way book. That was probably a good idea. It seemed like Theo was going to have a lonely summer. Hopefully Hermione could use her book to pass on messages from all of them.
"Alright, let's get started with Charms. We're reviewing Lumos and Nox, starting with entomology, then theory, then practice," Hermione said, checking her notes.
They all took out their Charms books and prepared to study.