Author's note: This is a little birthday surprise for someone really special (you know who you are) Happy happy birthday! I wish you all the best, you deserve it, and this one is for you. Rated M for loads of smut, and I don't think I even need to say what episode this is taken from. Hope you enjoy this and leave a review if you feel like it.
Yesterday she shut a door in his face, quite literally distancing herself from him, putting a barrier to separate between the two of them.
Yesterday she shut the door to her bunk in his face, when he was at his lowest, when he confessed his love for her and told her he needed her to help him pull himself out of whatever dark place he is in right now.
But that was yesterday, and today is oh so different. Today she watched a group of eight riders meet their death because one man decided to drown his sorrow in a bottom of a vodka bottle, and then hit the road in an early morning hour. Today she placed a black tag, lifeless body after lifeless body, for what felt like forever, losing battle after battle. She witnessed a single survivor making it out of the accident by the skin of his teeth. She watched her entire team, herself included, standing there, frozen, none of them able to come up with the words to break it to him that everyone else was dead.
His second family, the one he chose, the one that in many cases became the first, just as she thinks of every single one of the members of her station.
Days like today change her.
Andy can tell herself she has grown a thick skin by now all she wants. She has seen her fair share of blood and disasters, of people she could not save and family members on their knees, mourning the loss of a loved one. But the armor she has built around herself to protect her from other's pain can only take her so far, and today was one of the days that crawl deep. Deep under the thick skin it has taken her years upon years to grow and straight into her heart.
And as she sits at Joe's, sipping on her beer, it finally hits her, even though that isn't the metaphor she would have chosen after the horrors she had witnessed today.
Life is short, and seeing tomorrow's sunrise is not guaranteed. Not to her, not to anyone . And she is tired. She is tired of meaningless sex and leaving a trail of broken heart behind her, hers included in the mix. She is tired of shoving her feelings so deep down her throat she is constantly afraid she might choke on them. She is tired of holding on to that grudge when happiness is right in her reach, and the only thing she has to do is take it in between her hands and never let it go.
Her happiness, or at least someone she can find happiness with, if she only tries, knocked on her door yesterday, telling her he wanted in, so close yet so far, and she pushed him away.
Because she has been angry for so long, that's all she knows how to do by now. Angry at Maya for using something she confided with her, as a friend, to her personal advantage. Angry at Ryan for dying on her when she begged him to stay, even if she knows it wasn't his fault. Angry with her dad for keeping his illness from her, treating her with child gloves, like she is too fragile to handle the truth. Angry with Robert, blaming him for everything and anything, even though she knows how much he cares.
And maybe today is the day she finally, finally decides to choose her own happiness instead of all the weight she carries around on her shoulders all the time.
Andy looks at herself in the mirror in the bathroom. She had a shower before she left the station, so there isn't any remnant of that horrible call on her body, even though she knows this one is going to scar her heart for a long time.
She splashes a bit of cold water on her face, then turns around to exit the bar, her legs taking her to where she needs to be in the moment. In the arms she is certain will keep her safe and sound, if only he chooses to accept her, unlike the way she acted just yesterday.
And if he doesn't, if he turns her away... Well, who can blame him, but she has to try nonetheless.
She meets Jack right as she is about to head out. "Hey, are you okay?" He asks.
"Probably not." She answers honestly, tilting her head to one direction, placing her hands in the back pockets of the jeans she is wearing. "You?"
"No." His answer is the same. "Do you wanna blow off some steam?"
It is so easy to fall back into that place, into the familiar and the comfortable, instead of jumping into the unknown. And it is Jack, and they know each other so well, and his bedroom is right across from hers. It is fun and easy and has no strings attached, at least on her side, even though she isn't sure she can say the same regarding the man who stands in front of her.
But for the first time in her life she knows what she wants, and it isn't this.
"I… It's too messy." She comes up with an excuse.
Because what can she say to him? That she is in love with her battalion chief? The same man who broke her heart countless times before? That she is so in love with him, everything she has ever felt toward any other man in her life seems small now and insignificant? That it is Robert's arms she wishes will hold her tonight, if he wants the same?
"I thought we were trying to help each other." He pushes, relentless, and all she wants to do is head out of this stuffy bar and never look back. "You were helping me stay away from dangerous women, I was helping you feel something other than anger."
"You are… You did." She corrects herself. "I do." She says, because it is true, even though the man she feels deeply for is not the same man who stands in front of her. "Thank you." Andy places a kiss on his cheek, then adds, as if in an afterthought. "Be good?"
Because she is not in love with him, but he is still one of the closest friends she has, and she would hate it if he gets himself into trouble just because she is not there to keep her open eye on him.
"Never." Jack replies, and Andy knows he will take care of himself.
And then she leaves, crosses the bar in a few long strides, muttering a "See you" to her two coworkers who sits by the table she abandoned as she grabs her coat, and climbs up the stairs.
Her body knows what her mind doesn't have time to catch up to, and she doesn't hesitate before her fingers run across the screen of her phone, typing in the address to his house into the navigation app, one she didn't even realize she remembers by heart until now. She has paid a few visits to his house after the aid car accident, when he needed a few things while he was in rehab, and apparently, her body remembers what her mind has long forgotten.
The commute is quite short, he doesn't live too far away from the station, but there is still time for doubt to occupy her mind, and she isn't as determined as she was before she left the familiar and safe bar. Before everything has become so real that it makes her tummy turn into itself in anticipation mixed with anxiety.
He is in love with her, he told her so just yesterday, but sometimes love is not enough to forgive and forget someone else's mistake, and the thought of him shutting the door in her face, just like she did to him yesterday, starts creeping in, even though she does everything in her power to keep it away.
She holds onto the steering wheel even after she parks her car right in front of his house, grips it so hard her knuckles turn white.
Then she heads out, and she is in front of his door, and she can't regret it, won't allow herself to back away from the man who can make her so happy, even if she might come out heartbroken on the other side.
She brushes her hair back with one of her hands, on an instinct, as the other is shoved deep into the pocket of her coat, trying to keep herself warm as much as possible.
And then she knocks frantically on the door, before she has a chance to change her mind, before she has an opportunity to hesitate and slip right back to her car, disappearing.
Andy paces a bit on his threshold, waiting for him to answer, and releases all the air from her lungs as she does. Then he opens the door, looking confused, as if he isn't used to having the unannounced company, and she starts to speak, even though she doesn't have any idea as to what she is saying, didn't plan that much so far in advance.
"I don't want to fight anymore. I don't want to fight my dad, I don't want to fight you. I am so tired, and sad, and sick of being angry. And I just want to feel, and to be in a safe place, and I don't know how or why, and I… I can't explain it, but you are the safest place I have. And everything would be okay for the first time in a really long time if you would just start kissing me, now. So…" Fortunately for her, he stops her with his lips on hers, because frankly, she didn't have much left to say in order for him to take her in his arms and kiss her with all the fire he has inside of him.
He has one hand in her hair as they stumble blindly into his house, their eyes shut close and their lips locked tight together, her hands gripping his face. She kicks the door closed with one of her legs after she enters, and then he shoves her against it. His tongue traces her lower lip, asking for entrance, one she is happy to grant. Then the kiss they share becomes something heated, something filled with tongue and desire and teeth biting on lips, fighting over for control neither of them is willing to forfeit.
He tastes like one of the fruit smoothies he adores so much, and smells like he has just gotten out of the shower, like masculine body-wash and fabric softener and something she can't really put her finger on, but is intoxicating, filling her senses and makes her head spin slowly.
And it is good, so good, as good as the only other kiss they shared was, if not better, because she has a feeling that after everything they have been through, he is not going to push her away, not now, not anymore.
Her hands slide under the black sweater he is wearing, her fingernails making eight parallel lines across his abs, but instead of pulling him closer, she pushes him away, only a bit, only until she is able to look at him properly.
She wants to savor it, every moment of everything that is going to happen between them today.
His eyes are hooded with desire, his lips turning into a pout as he feels her putting some distance between the two of them, who are otherwise pressed against each other, body to body, so close nothing and no one can come between them. "Hey." She whispers, only now understanding she stormed in and announced her feelings without even letting out as much of a hello.
"Hey." He returns, and the grin on his face so big it stretches from ear to ear.
She has never seen him smiling like that, and she thinks that he might just be as happy with the big swing she decided to take, for a change. He looks at her with those big dark eyes, which have so much emotion in them ,and she can see in them all the things he can't put into words. Not yet.
Or maybe those are feelings that run so deep they still have yet to come up with words for them, not in English or in any other of the five languages he speaks.
He closes the distance between them, but this time his mouth flutters all across her face, starting from her forehead, down to her right eyebrow and to the curve of her nose, placing soft, butterfly kisses everywhere he can reach, as she likes to call them. Soft, tender kisses, ones she feels only barely on her skin, but feels deeply in the butterflies that now spread all across her belly.
And she is grinning like a love struck high school kid. And she can't help it, but even if she could, she isn't sure she would want that smile to disappear off her face.
"Can we just take it slow this time?" Andy breaths out as his small kisses move from her face to her jaw, and then travel down her neck. "I want to enjoy this, and last time making our way in the speed of light didn't quite work in our favor."
"Whatever you are comfortable with." He reassures her, but then he moves away, even if she can still feel his warm breath tickling down her throat. "I am sorry about that time, I really am. I didn't mean to hurt you, and I hope you believe me when I said it kills me to know I was the reason for the dark cloud you have been carrying around you, or at least a part of it."
Andy slips one of her hands out of his shirt and raises it to his face, tracing a circle with her thumb across his jawline in a manner she hopes is soothing. "Robert, if I didn't know that, I wouldn't be here." She reassures him. "But can we just enjoy ourselves now and save all the talking for later?"
Robert nods, then slips his hands into the belt loops in her jeans, pulling her impossibly closer to him. "Bedroom?" He asks, quite hesitantly, afraid to assume anything, even if she doesn't mind him assuming as much. Not at all.
"Yeah." Andy whispers. He helps her take off her coat, and when he goes to place it on the rack she suddenly misses the warmth of his body pressed against hers, even though he made exactly two steps away from her.
She doesn't have to wait long before his hands are back on her body, creeping their way slowly down her backside until he pulls her closer, his hands lingering low even after she is back to being pressed tightly against him, this time not having the door to lean against. "You are quite fond of my ass, aren't you?" It is more of an observation than a question, yet she still raises a suggestive brow at his direction, waiting for his answer.
"Among other things, yes." He confesses quite sheepishly.
"And what exactly are those other things?" She teases. One of his hands leaves her backside and travels up to her face, finding a piece of her hair and twirling it gently around his finger.
"It will be no fun at all if I just say everything right now." He pouts mockingly, which turns into a smile in no time. "No, I think I am going to leave it to you to find out."
The hand that was in her hair travels forward now, and he laces his fingers with hers. She releases her fingers from his grip and opens her palm, pressing it against his hand. It looks so tiny compared to his, and she bites her lower lip and she lets their fingers entwine back together. Robert's thumb brushes across her wrist, moving back and forth in a way she never thought could be charged with so much sexual tension.
They stay like that, immersing themselves in the moment, still standing by the door, knowing exactly what is to come next, but neither of them feels the need to rush it.
They have all the time in the world today, after all, and the entire place to themselves. There is no need to pretend or to hide.
They can be just them, Andy and Robert, just like that, two people in love with each other, and for the day, neither of them carries the weight of the world on their shoulders.
"You do want to explore everything." He breaths, and she nods, even though she knows it wasn't a question.
Andy has a feeling she is going to regret that.
"Robert." She breathes out his first name, even though the last time she let herself use it, she was heartbroken and angry. This time is different, though, filled with want and desire, and when he only hums softly to the sound of his name that barely passes her lips, she continues. "Take me to the bedroom."
He kisses her softly again, and mumbles "For the road.", as if they are going to separate from each other for weeks on end, and not the short minute it takes to make it up the stairs. That earns him a smile, and her heart suddenly feels warm as she knows she did the right thing by opening up to him and letting him in.
Robert's soft hold on her fingers never breaks as they make their way up the stairs. His steps are larger than hers, being much taller, but he takes his time, making sure she doesn't fall behind him and sneaks a glance back in her direction more often than necessary.
They find themselves in his bedroom in no time and all, and she stands on her tiptoes in order to wrap her arms around his neck. Her fingers find his nape, and she digs her nails into his skin a little bit, in a manner she knows won't hurt, not with the short fingernails her line of works requires.
He does nothing, just closes his eyes and leans into her touch, and by the way he inhales deeply she thinks he is trying to breath her in.
"Stop that." She warns, but he doesn't listen, just drops his head closer to her and nuzzles his nose into her neck. It makes her giggle, the way he holds himself so seriously as his nose tickles the delicate skin on her pulse point, which does nothing to help her case when she says "I mean it, stop it!"
He helps her out of the sweater she wears, throwing it down on the floor. She wears a simple bra, nothing sexy, nothing that says she came here with the intention to end up in her underwear.
Maybe she should have stopped by the apartment she shares with Jack for a quick change of clothing, picking something more revealing, something that is all black lace. She had a feeling that if she did, if she had the time to stop and really think things through, she wouldn't have found herself where she is now, in his arms, under his gaze.
Although, by the way his eyes skim over her body, over her newfound bare arms and belly, taking his time especially across the swells of her breasts, she thinks the underwear she wears is the least important thing on the list of things that occupy his brain right now.
She kicks her shoes and her socks off as he watches, doesn't tear his gaze from her for even a minute. "Swallowed your tongue, Sullivan?" Andy teases as she watches his Adam's apple bob.
"Oh no, it would be a shame if I did. This tongue is going to be of much use today." He bites back. She has never imagined him to be the kind of man who likes dirty talking in his bedroom, who likes to tease with his words.
She guesses she is going to learn many new things about him today.
They make their way to the bed, and Andy uses the moment to rid him from the black sweater he is wearing, too. It's a fair game they are playing, after all. He sits on the edge of the bed, and she straddles him ,sitting with one of her legs on either side of him.
Her mouth finds his in a moment, as they kiss slowly, taking their sweet time. When she shifts her weight forward in a slow thrust of her hips, she can feel the bulge in his pants tight between her legs.
This is going to be fun.
"Lie back." She orders, and he does just that, lowering himself until his back hits the mattress. She takes a long moment to just soak in his shape, tilts her head and lets her tongue out just a little as her eyes wander back and forth across his abs, his chest, his clavicle, his arms. He spends a lot of his free time at the gym, she knows that much, but she didn't remember him to be that fit the last time he has taken his shirt off for her.
"Swallowed your tongue, Herrera?" He uses her own words against her.
She lets one finger travel across his body, outlining the muscles on his chest, and every single one of his abs, she traces lower, as low as she can possibly get without taking his pants off, then lets out a "Say it again. I dare you." as she feels his breath becoming heavy under her touch.
She undoes the button of his jeans, but if she wants to take care of the zipper too, she will need to climb off him, and she is not ready for that, not yet. She just fumbles with the button, feeling the anticipation grow deeper in her lower abs. He pushes himself up on his hands and presses a soft kiss to her lips as he flips her over, and now she is the one to lie on her back, her eyes fixated on the ceiling.
"Is that okay?" He asks as he reaches his hand behind her back, and she knows exactly what he plans to do. Andy nods, and arches her back into his touch, giving him more access and letting him know she is more than fine with what he has in mind. He has to fumble a little, his fingers obviously not as well trained, but when he finally manages to unclasp her bra, he lets out a triumphant "Yes", like he has figured out some really complex math problem, and didn't do an action she does on the daily.
His stare fixates on her breasts immediately, gazing longingly, making her nipples two hard, dark peaks. She needs him to touch, needs him to do something that will elevate the aching sensation in her breasts, but when his kisses find her hairline, of all places, she sighs his name with as much anger as she can master.
"I will get there, don't worry." He promises as presses a kiss to the bridge on her nose, then to the coroner of her mouth, without her needing to explain what she wants.
"Will that be before or after I explode?" She bites, and it makes him chuckle into the skin of her neck. He doesn't answer that, just keeps his journey down to her collar bone. When she thinks it might be the moment he will finally do what she needs him to do, when she closes her eyes shut tightly and bunches the sheets between her fists, he just slides his tongue down the valley between her breasts, making a wet trail in his wake.
"Please." She begs. His mouth slides under her right breasts, and then he bites the soft, warm skin there. She whimpers, then moans, can't help it when he sucks down hard on her skin. "That will… That will leave a mark." She breathes out, barely able to find the words. Her nipples are sore now with the lack of attention, to a painful level.
"Are you planning for anyone else to see that area? Cause I would like to have you all to myself from now on, if it wasn't already clear."
He lifts his head up, as if he is waiting for her answer to determine his course of action. She is tempted to tell him he will need to learn how to share, curious to see what kind of reaction that might draw out of him, but to be frank, she wants him all to herself, too, and she doesn't plan on sleep around with anyone else soon, not when she has the one man she wants lying on top of her. "All yours." Andy promises.
He has two fingers pinching her left peak, and then his thumb moves back and forth on it in circular motions. It makes her let out a scream, makes her arch her back into his hand. "Like that?" He asks, trying to figure out what she likes. Andy bites her lip, her face turning a rosy color as she debates if she should ask him for what she really wants. But she is lying half naked beneath him now, and now is not the time for playing it coy. "Harder." She requests.
He hesitates just for a second, afraid to do something that will hurt her, but when he pinches the second time, it has definite pain mixed with the pleasure, one that sends a jolt of electricity all the way to her clit. He doesn't need to ask, knows by the reaction of her body he did just right, and he does it again, and again, until she can't breath and her head is spinning with the lack of oxygen.
She is a slippery mess between her thighs.
"You know, I don't usually allow clothes worn outside in my bed." He hisses, and she knows he is affected by what they are doing, it is clear in the sound of his voice, even if she didn't touch him at all, not really. He is panting, his breaths short and elaborated, and his voice is low and trembling.
"Then take it off." She encourages him. All he needed was her confirmation before he unzips her pants. She lies on her back, which means she needs to wiggle quite a bit in order for him to manage to take the jeans off, but he succeeds, eventually, and his pants go out in a swift move right after hers, leaving him wearing black boxers.
His mouth is back on her breasts, his teeth playing in her nipple, biting on occupations in a manner that makes her hiss. "Ass and breasts kind of man." Andy determines when she finds it in herself to talk again, when the pain is no longer that acute as his mouth travels down lower on her belly.
"Can you blame me?" He asks into her skin, his breath tickling a sensitive spot she didn't know she had. His tongue dips into her bellybutton, which makes her squirm under him and chuckle, and then he kisses lower, and lower, down her navel and right where the fabric of her low cut underwear meets her skin.
God, she prays she had worn something sexier.
"Will it be okay if I take these off?" Robert asks, making sure she is content with every step he makes.
"Only if you plan on finishing what you started." Andy teases, even though she is not sure why or how she is still talking. He takes it as a confirmation to move forward, as his thumbs hook at the edge of her underwear and take it off, throwing it into the pile of crumpled clothes right at his feet.
"Oh, I have every intention of following things through." He promises. He stands up then, straightening himself and watches her from above. Her breasts move with every inhale and exhale, and it catches his gaze, like a deer caught in the headlights. His left hand finds her left thigh, and his fingers travel up, up all the way to where she is already wet. He doesn't do anything, not really, as he explores the skin right outside of where she needs him. "Smooth." He notes.
"Please, Robert." Andy pleads. She was never really the one to beg in the bedroom, but if she is honest with herself, she never really had a partner who liked to take his time around her as much. They usually cut to the chase, and it never bothered Andy, not really, as long she gets her orgasm somewhere in the process.
This, the waiting… She doesn't know how she feels about it, and all she hopes is that will be worth it at the end.
"Patience." His voice is combined with some kind of a warning tone, his eyes dark, darker than they usually are as his hand keeps exploring, never touching her quite there. Andy sighs and sinks herself deeper into the mattress, waiting for something, anything to help with the pulsing ache between her thighs. Then he finally, finally slips one long finger through her folds, and her breath catches in her throat as he whispers. "Wet."
It is not enough, not even close, not when he doesn't even move the finger inside her, so she manages to mumble "Well, someone here knew how to get me that wet."
He chuckles, then teases back. "Complementing your way to an orgasm, don't you? But I will take it." He sits back between her legs, and then she feels it, the anticipation sitting low in her stomach as she knows what will come next. He has to move his thumb around a little, but he doesn't take him long before he finds her bundle of nerves and gives it one long and slow stroke.
It does something to her, makes her thrust her hips up and earns him a loud, encouraging moan.
"Is it okay if I do this for you?"
"Are you kidding me right now?" Andy asks back, because of course she is fine with it, way more than fine. He is the one who is about to do all the hard work, and all she has to do is lie back and enjoy the feeling of his mouth on her. God, she doesn't even have to be quiet, there is no one there besides herself and the man whose head is right between her legs in the moment.
He chuckles, and she wonders if her desperation is indeed that funny. Then he gives her one long lick, starting from her clit and ending in her entrance, and her mind goes completely dark, her mouth dry and her thoughts an incomprehensible mess.
"More." Andy begs, and he does just that, licking her slowly, his teeth nipping at her clit this time. She doesn't have to ask for anything more while he works her up, little by little, building the pleasure slow and steady inside her belly.
She loves it, loves a man who knows his way around a woman, one she doesn't have to explain and request everything from. Not that she wants to think about how he learned all those secrets and tricks. No, that will turn her off, so as of this moment she much rather just lie there, her eyes closed shut and every muscle in her body clenched tight as he works her with his tongue and his teeth and his lips.
Then sensation changes when he sucks on her clit, then travels further down between her folds. She is close, really close, she just needs something extra that will help her fall over the edge. "Robert." She breathes out his name. "I need more pressure there." She requests. He does just that, his thumb finding her clit again and strokes back and forth, this time faster, in short an intended motion, ones that are now meant to lead her to her release, instead of teasing her. Her own hands find her nipples and pinch, hard, trying to emulate the sensation he inflicted earlier, even though she doesn't do so as accurately. It still works, still sends zings of pleasure from her clit as she is still working on her breasts, back and forth, over and over again, an electricity she can feel all the way from her curled toes to the base of her skull.
And it is good, really, really, really good, the rare kind of good you experience when someone puts all of his attention on your satisfaction. And God, if she had known he was capable of doing these things with his mouth… Well, she might have come to his office back at the station, sit on his desk and let him eat her out much earlier.
Andy lets out a few whimpering sounds, ones she knows she will be embarrassed by once they are done, by right now, she doesn't care. It takes just another lap of his tongue for her to come, screaming his name, as she trembles under his touch. He uses his free hand low on her belly, trying to stabilize her as wave after wave of pleasure washes over her body.
He doesn't stop even as she calms down, just changes the rhythm into something more tolerable and less acute on her still sensitive body.
She has to get up, has to do something for him, can't imagine how he must feel like after she has found her release, and he didn't even get touched properly yet.
"Do you have a condom?" Andy asks, letting him know that she wants to see this all the way to the end. She is not the one to sleep around, but he isn't some random stranger she picked up at a bar. It is Robert, her Robert, the man who makes her laugh, the man who held her when she cried over the inevitable loss of her father. The man who makes her feel, and waiting just seems stupid and useless, especially after today.
"Are you sure that is what you want?" He asks, as if there is any other way this day can end for the two of them.
"Do you want me to walk away now that I had my release?" Andy raises a brow at him, even though it is obvious she won't do such a thing. He is trying to be considerate and tender, and she appreciate him for that, appreciates him for trying to respect her boundaries as they are still trying to get acquainted with each other bodies, but God, she just wishes he would ditch the talking and fuck her already.
"In the drawer on your right." Robert points her in the right direction. She pushes her body up all the way to the bed frame, then shoves the items there around until she finds the small foil packet.
She tosses it to him, but right before he is about to rip it open she asks. "Wait, not yet." He looks at her crookedly, trying to figure out if she is having a change of heart. "Can you come closer, please?" She uses a small, seductive voice.
He hovers on top of her in less than a moment, his face close, and she presses a soft kiss to his lips. She helps him out of his boxers and throws them somewhere over the edge of the bed, and then she takes a minute to just look at him. He is big, long and wide, and she isn't the kind of woman to measure and engage in comparison, but just by the look of it, he wins over any other man she has ever slept with.
There is a shiver going down her spin as she reaches her hand out, giving the tip a soft brush with her thumb over and over again. It makes him throw his head back, makes him swallow hard. She moves forward now, taking him in her hand and stroking him slowly tip to base.
God, she doesn't think giving a man a hand job has ever turned her on as it does now, has never made her as hot as she is when she hears the low, primal sound he lets out.
"Andy, if you keep going like this, I won't be able to hold on long enough." He warns her. Andy releases her grip, and after he takes a few moments to catch his breath, he rolls the condom on.
"I am on top." Andy calls, and she thinks he is about to argue, but then he just slides with his back down on the mattress, ready to obey. She places each of her hands on his shoulders, then lowers herself down to kiss him, her back arching in the process. Then she bits down his lip as she sinks into him.
The sensation overwhelms her a bit, being stretched out. It doesn't hurt, but she feels him deep inside of her as she keeps lowering herself into him, inch by inch. Every muscle in her body burns as she starts to move on top of him, slowly at first, letting him slip almost all the way out, leaving only his tip inside of her before she pushes herself back down.
"Andy." He groans her name, and it is her sign. She picks up the pace, as he suddenly starts to thrust up towards her, meeting her halfway. His hands come forward, brushing her clit, and there it is again, the steady, quick movement that makes her head spin and her belly clench. She is wet and she is suddenly close, again, really, really close, and she just hopes he has enough stamina in him to keep going, at least until she finds her release again.
The room is filled with the sound of flesh grinding against flesh and their heavy panting, the occasional moan that slips out of their mouths as they rock themselves frantically against each other now. Other than the pleasure and the feeling of his erection deep inside of her, reaching just to the right spot every time, she feels a trail of sweat drops trickling their way down her nape.
Then her fingers dig deep into the skin of his shoulder, leaving half crescent marks, and she doesn't care if she pains him or not at the moment. She thrusts her hips forward once, twice, and as his thumb presses just at the right time, just at the right spot, she finds her release, her head spinning as she chokingly moans out his name.
He doesn't take long after her, as if he was waiting for her to finish before he can find his release, too. He is still inside her as the both of them catch their breaths as they come back from their highs.
"That was…" Andy starts. She doesn't make a habit of petting a man's ego, but this time it was different, and maybe, just maybe, all those people who called it making love were right. Maybe it is somewhat better if there are feelings involved. Or maybe he is just that good in bed, she isn't sure.
"I know." He whispers, like they are sharing a secret only they know and understand.
Or maybe they are sharing a secret now. She has slept with her battalion chief, and to be honest, she doesn't feel any regret or shame. She feels happy, and satisfied, and she won't let anyone take it away from her by telling her what she does is wrong and forbidden.
Andy rolls off him, letting him go take care of the condom before he comes back to join her back in bed.
When he slides back in under the covers, Andy finds his chest and uses it as a pillow, propping her head so she would be comfortable enough. His hands find her skin immediately, but his touch is less sexual now, turned into something more domestic and tender. His fingers are on her ribs as he stokes, and she can just purr and snuggle closer to him like a kitten.
She doesn't want to ruin the moment with questions about what the future might hold for the both of them, just wants to soak herself in the here and now and not think at all. She is surprised when he is the one to ask. "Will you spend the night? We can have dinner and watch a movie and drink some wine." She doesn't know what time it is, but it can't be past noon, not when she left the station at 8 am, and she understands that he wants her around. Wants more than sex, even though they will probably go at it again sometimes later, if the ache between her thighs will subside.
"Yeah." She finds herself saying without giving it a second thought. Her finger finds his collar bone and trails back and forth along the defined line, as she adds. "Will you stay here until I fall asleep? It was a terrible shift, but I am sure you have to get a lot of things ready for our at home date night tonight." She chuckles into his skin. He doesn't answer, but rather presses a soft kiss to the top of her head, so she knows he will stay until she is out, and probably even much longer than that.
And just like that, as she lies in the arms of the man she is in love with, somewhere between sleep and wakefulness, for the first time in a very long time, she finds happiness where once, not too long ago, all she could find was anger and resentment.