The First, The Last, The Only; TIME
1985; Three years before Nick's Birth
30 seconds to Mars; Do or Die If you're paying attention to the music, this is intentional.
(Blink and you'll miss it. This may seem like a recap- but there is something in here people might not understand if it wasn't pointed out)
Grace flew into the darkness until she came upon a small basket that was tossed to the side of the road and the unheard voice that cried within. The shadow that had been crawling through history and the world picked it up and let her head hang as she removed the only living infant still wrapped in plastic, meant to suffocate her as it had all the others. She looked around at the hilltops, dark mountains that were capped with snowy peaks and cradled the infant to her chest as she lost the battle to breathe again. "I will give you the life you were never meant to have, if you will give me the soul I never had. We shall be one, hope that we make the right choices on this journey, for even I will not be able to see through the veil between life and death while I am in the light." The vixen waited as the tiny ember floated up and caught it in her paw as she slipped into the shadows again, reappearing many miles away at the quaint little cabin situated among the rocky mountain terrain. She laid the body of the child on a doorstep and held the lost soul out as she closed her eyes. "Freya…"
Freya's ears set as the shadows danced around her, a glance out the window and a single distant star blinked as she stood from her seat. She looked out watching her mate and children all discussing something before she slipped into another room and drowned all the light as she closed the curtains. "Grace? Did you call for me?" she whispered as the room became still…. "Are you here?" The wolf tipped her ears as the vixen appeared in front of her, an expression on her face that was as easily read as one of her own children as the vixen opened her paw. Freya's brow curled as she looked to the little ember and back to Grace. "You have not put them all in place yet?"
Grace nodded as she kept her eyes ticking around the floor and Freya smiled softly as the vixen curled her paw back around the little ember and pulled it to her chest.
"You know where Loki is?" she asked and watched as Grace dipped her head and closed her eyes. "Heimdall, Sigyn and…her?" Grace sighed as she clenched her eyes tighter and curled one arm around herself as the other stayed locked at her chest holding the lost soul she had.
The vixen shied her eyes as she held out the tiny speck in her paw. "I cannot see any further than where I left him with his parents, I barely managed to set them all in place because I could not see the path. I must go back a few years before they are all born, to be born, so that there is a chance we will meet. So there is hope he will find her."
"Are you sure you need to do this?" Freya cocked her head to one side as Grace closed her eyes.
"I know the path does not end yet. Not here. I just cannot see from now until it does. It can only mean I am part of it. I don't know what will happen and I will forget everything, even why I am there, and I am… afraid."
The she wolf tilted her head in a motherly fashion as she smiled. "You have been able to be in all places at once in all your existence, have never known pain, have never known fear, have always known what would come next. There is so much more that you do not know Grace. So much that is better than the darkness you have taken care of and the fear you feel now. To quote one of your own lines, no one has power over free will, unless it is their own will. It is your choice to make. You must be the one who lets it all go. You have already made up your mind if you have come this far."
The vixen closed her eyes sighing as she pulled the tiny ember back to herself and nodded. "Mother of life, mother of love, help me please. Help me live." Grace stood with Freya and over the tiny body she'd laid on the porch. She pulled all of herself to the two places and away from all she'd ever been.
The wolf smiled as Grace reached into her robe and handed her a small nest. "They will be reborn and need to be watched while I am away. There is another I need you to look in on in his darkest hour." Freya tipped her head. "I have been his shadow all his life, kept him hidden and never left him alone. He will need you. I placed a part of my darkness in his fur to keep him safe and help him with the armor, after I used grains of sand to make the others all the fates. He will be overtaken by it if he sees no light in his darkest hour."
"You altered the armor?"
Grace closed her eyes and tipped her head. "No. I let the Gods within it see what would happen. I allowed them all to see there was no future if something was not changed. They chose to help me, to help his mother and father."
Freya smiled as Grace looked back at her. "Heimdall as well? Odin's eye soaked up the knowledge from the waters of wisdom, you changed the eye so he could see into the future with a grain of your sand?" Grace nodded as Freya took the nest and sat it aside. "Where did Sigyn come from?" Grace let her lips tremble as she looked back at the motherly figure.
"You have decided on the Fates, moved through yourself and history to get here. You have already made the choice, but I will help." Grace held out her paws and Freya took the fox in her arms, letting her shrink into a tiny mist with the ember she held. She blew her breath into the space and Grace pulled herself into the lost soul.
Freya turned smiling as she watched the eggs hatch. "Huginn and Muninn. The thought and memory of all Time." She stepped out her window as she watched a shooting star fly away, biting back her tears as she cupped her paws to her chest. "Become all you have cared for, be all you have done. Live. Rage, Grace, Rage against the dying of the light…"
On a distant world, light years away, the vixen curled around the breath she had been given, and poured all of herself into the tiny body of a small vixen. Becoming a tiny fox that now held new life, leaving all she'd even known behind, and lost within the light she'd never known. The last thought in her mind as she left the darkness behind was a single name, a solitary thought she hoped she could remember as she repeated it in her mind. Fox God…. Guide him, save him so he can find …her. Loki, Loki, Loki, Loki….
The red fox within the cabin's ears shot up and he scrunched one side of his lip up as the goats sitting around the table with him all looked around. "You hear a kid crying too?" one of them asked and the fox's ears tilted back and forth as he nodded. They all got up and went towards the door, leaving their game of cards on the table. He opened the door and lifted both brows at the tiny infant lying on his porch.
"My Gods!" the fox picked her up curling an arm around her naked little body as he looked over the rest of the porch.
"Abandoned? You hear anything else?" the goat asked as the fox cringed and looked around shaking his head. "Just one?"
The tod looked around frowning as the goats around him all watched curiously. "She's so cold. She wasn't even cleaned after being birthed." He rushed into the kitchen filling the sink with warm water before lying the tiny infant in and watching as she stopped fussing while she warmed in the water. He was holding her head above the surface as her body floated. "Like that don't you?' he asked as the goats looked around his arms.
One of the Billie's turned to the others and shook his head as he shrugged. "I…thought he moved here because he didn't like kids?" One whispered as the other shook his head in a face that screamed shut up.
"He moved here because he couldn't have a family. Some kind of accident when he was younger. Said because of his family name and that he couldn't have a family, he didn't feel like he belonged with other foxes. His parents moved him here with his aunt when he was younger." He whispered as the tod chuckled at the little vixen stretching her arms in balled fists as she yawned.
"Say, do you guys know where I can get some milk?" the tod asked as he ran a finger over the little vixen's head before he picked up a cloth and was gently cleaning her off.
The goat who was standing closest nodded as he scratched his head. "All over the place here, Nanny goats always have plenty of it." He looked at the clock and shook his head. "Can't tell what time it is if your clock isn't working Michael, but I can go ask one of the old gals for you if it's not too late."
The tod turned his head to the wall and back to another clock on the stove and dropped his brow. "All my clocks stopped?" He turned back looking at the little vixen and smiled as she pursed her lips into an o and stuck her tongue out. "You're all wrinkly baby girl, like an extra cute version of a little old lady." The tod snickered as she sucked on one of his knuckles.
The Billie behind him covered his grin as the goats around him all snickered. "Worse than the cards he plays and flowers he grows." They all chuckled as the fox grabbed a small towel from a rack above the sink and turned around fussing over her. "Think you're all in there Michael."
The fox smiled as he sat down, coddling the little vixen in his arms as he dried her off. "Yeah, I'm All en…" He looked back up as they ticked their eyes between him and the little girl he was holding.
"What you calling her Michael? I thought foxes took the vixen's name, you aren't mated."
"Guess she'll be unusual then, carrying the name of Loxley from a tod." He grinned as he looked her over.
"Loxley? You related to that Robin Hood guy?"
The tod snickered as he shook his head, watching the little vixen cooing in his arm. "No, it's the town my family came from way back, but a lot of mammals thought that because of the name, no one really knows what that guy's real name was anymore, least not anywhere I've heard of. Part of the reason I left."
"So, she's a Loxley, what about her other names?"
The red fox looked off in thought as he caught the scent of the newly blooming flowers in his window and smiled. "A cute wrinkly little old lady that arrived the day the tansy's bloomed. Made all my clocks stop with her arrival. A fighter too. Hehe, yeah I know what I'll call her…. Ellie Tansey Loxley." The tod blinked as his face curled up.
"What's wrong Michael?"
He sighed as he looked back to the little vixen sucking on one of his knuckles and smiled. "We have to move, so she's around other foxes."
The goats looked at each other and sighed. "I'll be back, I'm going to go see if Biddy has some milk. It's gonna be dull around here without you though." The fox chuckled as the others retook their seats.
"Where are you going to go Michael? We thought you didn't want to go back because of the errr…"
The red fox looked at the vixen in his arms, smiling as he shook his head. "Sometimes, the only way to hold on, is to let go. The only way to move forward may be to go back. We aren't leaving just yet. I'll wait a few years and look around, find somewhere that's right for us, where there's hope for foxes again." He smiled wider as she cooed at him and gnawed on his knuckle again. "We have time…"
In another part of the world a small crime Lord frowned. Mr. Big cocked an eyebrow as he sat up, pulling the little locket from his pocket and looking it over before pressing it to his ear. "Hmm, it has stopped ticking." He looked it over again and raised a brow after he popped it open. "and the hands have faded away…"
Eight years later;
The young vixen clutched the stuffed little sheep in her paws to her chest as she sniffled again. Her father reached over pulling her face to him as he smiled. "It will be alright, you'll see."
She sighed as she looked out the window and shook her head. "I don't want to move Daddy. All my friends are here."
He nodded as she looked at him with tears in her eyes. "I know, but you'll make new friends."
She curled her lip as he put the car in gear and frowned as she grumbled. "I don't want to make new friends. There's nothing wrong with the friends I already have."
The tod in the seat chuckled as he pulled away from the driveway. "No there isn't, but that doesn't mean you can't make new ones."
"Why do we have to move Daddy? I like it here!"
The tod sighed as he kept his eyes on the road and pulled over after they left to the little mountain trail that led to their home as the young vixen sobbed into her stuffed animal. "You need to be around other foxes Elly. We may not be the most social of creatures, but you'll never find a normal life here."
The vixen wiped her cheeks as she glared out the window. "Well who cares about being normal anyway! I just want to be happy!"
Her father laughed as he looked the other direction. "I think you're deciding too soon that you won't be happy. Can you at least try? The city I found is unlike anything you've ever seen and I bet you'll love it. They have a den there that's the talk of the whole fox community now."
She tipped her head at him scowling as she tightened her arms over her chest. "What's so great about a den anyway? There isn't one here and I was happy."
The tod sighed as he rubbed his forehead. "Honey, I would do anything to make you happy. But there's no chance you'll ever meet another fox here. We're the only red foxes who live in the mountains like this. There aren't even any arctic foxes here. I just want you to meet some of your own kind and see what it's like for the rest of the foxes. All of us have a den and you're almost old enough to join one too."
The young vixen curled her lip as she looked at her father glaring. "If all foxes are part of a den, how come we live here? What den were you part of? Why did we leave? Was my mother there too?"
The tod cringed as he bit into his finger. "No she wasn't. I don't want to talk about your mother. Look this will be fun! Something new and exciting! You'll meet all kinds of new people and see things you could only imagine when we get there."
The young vixen let her head hang and he cinched one shoulder into his cheek as tears fell from her muzzle and dripped from her nose into her lap. "I don't want new and exciting. I want old and comfortable."
He unlatched her seat belt and pulled her to his side as he wrapped an arm around her. "I love you and I know this is scary. Something new is always scary, but we'll be together and I know you'll be happy again. Wait until you see this city. It's like the ninth wonder of the world!"
She looked up at him sniffling as she ran her arm across her nose and he rolled his eyes. He reached into the glove box and pulled several tissues out he cleaned off her arm and face with. "Please don't do that. A young lady should always use a tissue."
"Who said I wanted to be a lady anyway!" she growled.
He chuckled when he shoved them over her nose. "You're pretty close to being a young lady already and I can see exactly how beautiful you're going to be. Blow." She looked up at him frowning before she blew her nose and leaned into his side as he shoved the used tissue in a trash sack behind the seat. "I'm telling you lambchop, you'll love it there."
The young vixen looked up at him and narrowed her eyes as he smiled. "Stop calling me that!"
"I can't help it, he was the first guy you had a crush on."
"Daddy! I was seven!"
"Well, I know you'll get another name when we get there. A den always gives a young fox a new name when they're old enough to start learning our ways." She cocked a brow as he smiled down at her. "This city has districts where the weather is different in every section of town. Buildings are shaped like trees and there are walls made of ice. Towers that look like ribbons blowing in the wind sit all over the place. There's no other place in the world like it. You'll get to see the ocean too."
Her ears perked as he sat up smiling, knowing he'd finally touched something that caught her attention. She'd always been fascinate with the rain and water. "The ocean?" she asked as her ears flipped again.
He nodded as she sat up in the seat chewing her lip. "We have to take a boat to get there. We'll be on the water for a few months because it's so far away. It's the only way to take the car."
The young vixen looked around nervously and he fought not to smile as he kept his brows raised, waiting. "Months?" she asked and he nodded as she tried to hide her smile. "What's it like there?"
The tod chuckled as she set her ears on him. "There are trees made of glass, with leaves that make the roofs as large as the cliffs we played on. Ice walls that are taller than the highest peaks at the waterfall, and a den that is under the ground where all the foxes meet and teach each other how to fox."
"How to fox?" she asked as she smiled wider.
"Yes," he answered smiling as she tilted her head. "We learn how to be sneaky, and tricky, and sly with our words, with our actions, with everything we do in life. Where we learn how to be like….." he looked around sneakily as she giggled. "The God of Mischief!"
"Looooooki!" she whispered, dragging out the name and giggling as he grabbed her nose.
"Ch- ch- ch! Don't say his name!" her father pulled her nose from side to side, laughing as she scrunched her muzzle and snapped her teeth at him playfully. "This den is special. It's the first one ever made and they thought it was just a myth. It's covered in massive carvings and statues of the fox that are as big as the cliffs the goats climbed around on." Her eyes dropped and he knew he'd used a poor choice of words bringing up the friends they were leaving behind again. "I booked us a room on the boat that has a view of the ocean you can watch as we travel there."
"You got a room that I can see out a window?" She asked and he smiled as he nodded.
"We get to eat there, and sleep there, and watch the islands go by. We'll be able to watch the rain and the waves that crash over the side of the boat."
"Where will we live when we get there?"
He smiled as he pet her ears back. "I bought a little house that's just big enough for us, with a yard where we can grow all the flowers and herbs we can sell there."
"We're still going to grow flowers and plants?" She asked.
He chuckled as she looked at him with a tilted brow. "Of course. I know how much you love working in the dirt and watching as the rain waters the plants."
The vixen sighed as she looked out the window. "What will my new name be?" she asked as he scrunched his nose and narrowed his eyes in thought.
"Hmm. I'm not sure. It will usually be picked by someone who knows you or has something to do with you." He looked off and smiled before she sat up and bounced in the seat. "Do you know what your name means?" he asked and she deadpanned him.
"Ellie? Daddy! You won't tell me what it means!"
He chuckled as she curled her lip at him. "No, not your first name, your second name. Do you know what Tansy means?"
She curled her lip as she looked off in thought and he smiled as she looked back at him grinning. "It's the name of the flower that bloomed the day I was born."
"Yes it is, but they call it something else too." She cocked a brow at him as he stuck a claw on her shirt. She looked down, seeing it resting on one of her buttons before he flicked it up tapping her nose and laughed as she giggled and shot away from him yelling again.
"DADDY!"
The tod chuckled as she curled around him and looked down at her as she glanced up at him. "They call it a Button! We'll see if that sticks when we get there."
"What're they going to call you?"
He looked at her grinning. "I think...Allen will work."
"Why Allen?"
"Because for you, I'm all in - Allen! But if we don't hurry we're going to miss the boat we have to catch, and you'll never see the ocean."
"Get me on a boat!" she squealed excitedly and he laughed as he motioned to the seat belt. She clicked in over her waist and leaned into his side as he put the car back in gear. "How long will it be before I meet other foxes?"
The tod smiled watching her eyes droop. It was early in the morning and they'd stayed up late sending time with everyone before the move. "It will be a few years. We need a little time to get settled there so you're used to the city and all the differences." He chuckled as she leaned into his side and yawned as she closed her eyes….
The little vixen was asleep as he pulled the car through the gates and onto the ferry that led to a larger ship. He sat with her as the waves rocked them back and forth and was grinning ear to ear as she yawned and rubbed her eyes, sitting up. Her eyes flew open as a horn blew and she shot in the seat looking out the window before she jumped from the car. He jerked the door open, laughing as he ran after her. "Hey! Slow down! Don't get too close to the edge, Honey."
The vixen stopped and gawked as she looked over the rail and out to the open ocean. "It's so big…You can't see anything but water from here!" she whispered as he stood beside her, watching the wonder in her eyes as she turned a full one eighty and looked around.
"The world is a big place, this is only the first stop."
She bit her lip as she looked up at him from a lowered head. "Are you sure I'll like it there and make new friends?"
He held his arms out waiting until she curled around him and looked down at her smiling as he tipped his head to the open water. "Is the ocean big?" he asked as he sucked in a breath. She nodded as she looked around. "How big is it?" she scrunched her brows down as he smiled at her and tightened his arms around her in a tight hug. He gasped as he shook his head like he was shocked. "You mean you don't know how big it is?!" She shook her head giggling as she looked up from his chest. "It's as big as I am sure that you'll be happy and make new friends."
"What's the name of the town?"
He chuckled as she kept her eyes on him. "It used to be called Jericho. It means City of the Moon. Now it's called Zootopia. The Den is called the Den of Thieves. The God Of Mischiefs first temple."
The little vixen closed her eyes and sighed as he pet her ears. "If it has something to do with Loki-
"Ch! Ch! Don't say his name! " He dipped his head to hers as he closed his eyes. "We'll be able to find a better future there. I know you'll love it."
"Ok Daddy…."
Notes; The name Michael means; "Who is Godlike?" (A rhetorical question) It's also the only name given for an archangel that's identified in the bible and he's the Chief of all Angels. The 'highest messenger'. A reminder; if you are thinking this has anything to do with the modern version of 'God'. Referring to Catholics, Christians, anyone with some type of God- you are still VERY WRONG - But there is no denial about references from many different cultures, religions, stories and fables, history and weaving them all together through imagination, etc. AAAAND- some of the music is bad-period, but it fit and the majority of it was chosen for its clues and mood to the area of the story it is in. Rage against the dying of the light is from a poem by Dylan Thomas; Do Not Go Gently Into That Good Night. Profound in the story line. Shrug poetry is all through history too and it really fit.
This story is based on the premise of reincarnation. (Really hope that isn't a reality) The reason Nick, Judy and Jack have black in their fur when no other species of their kind do has nothing to do with their biological lineage or who they are reincarnated as or were in previous lives. It has everything to do with the fact that Time/ darkness carried their souls between each life without returning them to the spark of creation. Skye never had any black in her fur because she was born from Time's sand and a seed and darkness has no effect on her because she is the daughter of Time. Finnick doesn't have any in his fur because he was reincarnated through the natural course of things, Time just knew who he was and had already chosen him before his first life to become a fate. He plays the drums when he gets older; Time marches to the beat of a drum. He's obsessed with wolves. 'Someone large enough to carry the past and hold the weight of the world as it grows.' The gods aren't going to show up much in the future and the few times they do it's to save one who was thought lost (Scrolls of Odin). But it would take someone with a large soul to carry the weight of the past and the weight of the world as it grows on his shoulders. (Atlas reference) It was explained to Mimir in chapter five. I think its obvious who Finnick was born as in his first life even though I didn't write much about him, but Time didn't make him a Fate until she placed grains of sand in his ears.