Chapter 33
An: Thank you so much for the support. I will not be able to update tomorrow as I have (what should be) my last actual day of classes at Law School, and it's a long day. I'll post again the day after.
May 16th 2012
A week has passed since Phil's funeral in that time Kora has been staying at Melinda's apartment the entire time, so has Bobbi, and by necessity Hunter, while Gordon, Mack, Natasha, Clint, and Maria have all been around as much as possible. This has caused Melinda's apartment to be rather cramped as Kora has been sharing Melinda's room, while Bobbi shared Daisy's and Hunter slept on the couch, with the others laying on the floor wherever they can fit if they stayed over.
As Bobbi had to go back to work, and Hunter had an opportunity he had to pursue, Melinda, Daisy, Kora and Gordon, are the only ones in Melinda's apartment, which is feeling rather empty compared to how it has been; and is about to get even more so.
"I'm sorry, I wouldn't go if I didn't have to," Kora explains, looking between her sister and niece, it being clear even without Melinda feeling her sisters emotions that she feels bad about leaving.
"Aunt Kora, it's okay, we understand," Daisy assure her, and Melinda nods in agreement with her daughter.
"If you need anything, either of you, just call and we'll be here," Kora says, looking between her sister and niece, clearly speaking for her and Gordon.
"We know," Melinda tells her sister, and once she does Kora and Gordon both hug Melinda and Daisy. As both her sister and brother hug Melinda she feels that they regret the fact that they need to leave, but she also feels how important they feel going back to Afterlife.
"I'll check in in a few days," Gordon says, before disappearing with Kora, leaving Melinda and Daisy alone in their apartment.
"I'm gonna miss them," Daisy admits, though she knows that her aunt and uncle will be back soon.
"I know," Melinda responds.
"Um, so, if it's okay Laura and my friends have been trying to get me to go out for days, would it be okay if I went and met up with them?" Daisy asks her mother curious, as the truth is she really wants to but won't if her mother isn't going to be okay.
"Of course," Melinda tells her daughter, knowing what her friends, especially Laura mean to Daisy so it could be good for her, and in response Daisy just hugs her. As Daisy hugs her mother Melinda feels the emotions that her daughter is feeling.
"Daisy, you don't have to worry about me, I'll be okay," Melinda assures her daughter, as they break apart.
"Using your gift is cheating," Daisy informs her mother, smirking slightly. "But are you sure?" Daisy asks, as this will be the first time that her mother is completely alone since Phil's death.
"I'm sure," Melinda tells her daughter, and because her mothers voice is completely void of emotion she can't tell whether or not Melinda is lying.
"Okay," Daisy says, though she is still a little concerned. "Um, can I borrow the car?" Daisy asks curious.
"Sure," Melinda answers.
"Great," Daisy says, grinning slightly, but it feels rather wrong for her to do so.
"Just let me know if you will be home for dinner," Melinda informs her daughter.
"Will do," Daisy assures her mother. "I'll see you later," Daisy says, before grabbing what she needs and leaving the apartment.
After Daisy leaves Melinda walks over to the couch and sits down, as she sits on the couch Melinda can't help but think about all the time she spent with Phil on this couch, sometimes with Daisy between them, but more often than not the two of them. Even before they got together, she and Phil spent a lot of late nights together on the couch. As she remembers the times she spent with Phil Melinda knows what she should be feeling, but her abilities prevent her from feeling it, and she doesn't know if it is a good thing or a bad thing. As she sits on the couch Melinda decides that she does not want to think about her memories so she grabs a jacket, and heads out of her apartment.
Once out of her apartment Melinda heads to where she parks her motorbike which she gets on and, without a helmet, starts to drive.
After a while of driving, not even really paying attention to where she is going or what she is doing, Melinda realizes that she has ended up outside of Phil's apartment building. For a few moments Melinda sits on her bike staring up at the building she knows so well, before parking and turning off her bike, and heading upstairs.
As Melinda approaches Phil's apartment door she knows what she should be feeling, but that knowledge doesn't stop her from using her key and entering the apartment. Just like at her home when Melinda walks into the apartment she remembers all the time she has spent there, all the decades of memories as Phil has had the same apartment since they left the Academy.
As Melinda looks around her eyes linger on the kitchen and she remembers all the times, in the early years after they finished the Academy, that they would sit in that kitchen eating, and drinking whiskey as they talked too wired from a mission to sleep. Even though she can't feel the fondness attached with those memories Melinda knows she should be feeling it.
After spending a couple of minutes in the main area of the apartment Melinda heads to the bedroom, another place she has spent a lot of times in, whether it was because Phil was insisting on being a gentlemen and insisted she took the bed after they had been drinking, or whether because they were sharing it.
Looking around the room Melinda can basically picture Phil laying in the bed, clear as day. As she looks around Melinda sees a wrapped gift on the chest of draws. If it was possible for her Melinda would be feeling curiosity and so she walks over. Getting to the chest of draws Melinda sees that there is a tag on to so she has a look and sees Phil's familiar writing that says;
Daisy,
Happy 17th Birthday
Love Cols
"Oh Phil," Melinda says to herself, as she should have realized that Phil would have brought Daisy's birthday present early. Putting down the present Melinda opens the top draw and just like she knew she would find Melinda finds Phil's favorite t-shirt, which of course has Captain America, on it, and picks it up. Just like she knew it would the shirt smells like Phil, and for a couple of seconds it is almost like Phil is next to her. Still holding the shirt Melinda looks down and sees the SHIELD shirt that Phil would often sleep in; which she also picks up. Just like the Captain America shirt the SHIELD shirt smells just like Phil, and so while she closes the draw Melinda keeps the shirts, and also picks up the present, before heading back to the main area of the apartment. Planning on just spending a bit of time sitting in Phil's home; remembering the times they have had together.
June 4th 2012
A little over two weeks have passed since Melinda stole two of Phil's shirts, and collected the present Phil got for Daisy, and ever since Melinda has been sleeping in the shirts she took from Phil's apartment.
It is a Saturday morning and having just had a shower after doing her tai-chi Melinda walks into the living room where Daisy is sitting on the couch. Walking towards her daughter Melinda sees that Daisy has their photo album sitting on the coffee table in front of her.
"Daisy?" Melinda asks, as she sits down next to her daughter.
"I miss Cols," Daisy admits, looking over at her mother.
"I know, I do too," Melinda confirms.
"I thought looking at the album would help… but I just miss him more," Daisy admits, having no idea what to say Melinda just puts her arm around her daughter. As soon as she puts her arm around Daisy Melinda feels her daughter's emotions, she feels how hurt Daisy is, how much she misses Phil.
"You don't have to look at the photos, you have plenty of memories of Cols," Melinda tells her daughter.
"I know," Daisy responds. "I have a question," Daisy says, before flipping back a few pages. "When was this?" Daisy asks, pointing to a specific picture.
Looking down at the picture Melinda remembers exactly from when it was from as in the picture it is her, Phil, and Daisy when she was just a baby, the three of them are sitting around a café table, with Daisy in a pram.
"My twenty-nineth birthday," Melinda tells her daughter. "You were almost five months old. Phil knew that I missed Aunt Kora so he surprised me, we spent the entire day together. it was incredible," Melinda admits.
"Sounds nice," Daisy says, smiling slightly, and because Melinda still has her arm around her daughter she feels Daisy's joy.
"It really was," Melinda admits, being able to smile because she is feeling her daughter's emotions.
"What about this one?" Daisy asks, pointing to another picture, and once again Melinda starts to explain the picture to her daughter. For the next few hours Melinda and Daisy look at the pictures and reminisce about the stories behind them. After a while they are joined by Bobbi, Mack, and Hunter, who join in on the reminiscing.
July 2nd 2012
A month has passed since Melinda and Daisy spent hours looking at photos of the lives they have had with Phil.
It's early on a summers Monday, the day of Daisy's seventeenth birthday, and for only the second birthday in her life Daisy hasn't excitedly gotten out of bed as soon as she woke up, rather she is just lying in bed.
As she lies in bed Daisy's mind drifts to Coulson, and tears come into her eyes. While this is the second birthday, she won't get to experience with Phil this ones different, it's the first of a lifetime. As she lies in bed, not wanting to get up as she thinks of Coulson Daisy hears the sound of muffled voices and sounds coming from the kitchen. As usually Phil would make breakfast for her birthday Daisy can't help but wonder what's going on and there is a small part of her that thinks, just for a second, that maybe the last two months have been a lie and she will find Phil when she walks out into the kitchen.
Feeling a tiny glimmer of hope Daisy throws off her blanket and heads out into the kitchen, and as soon as she walks into the living room she feels a wave of sadness as she sees it is not Phil like she was desperately hoping but rather Bobbi, Kora, Gordon, Mack, and Hunter are all crammed in the small kitchen while Melinda is sitting at the bench.
"What's going on?" Daisy asks, as she looks between the members of her family.
"We know every year Phil would make you breakfast for your birthday," Bobbi says.
"And we also know that, with the exception of Kora, none of us are as good of cook as he was, but we thought it would be nice if we made you breakfast," Mack tells Daisy.
"Thank you," Daisy says, even though it is incredibly painful for her to do so.
"Pull up a stall, we've still got a bit too cook," Hunter comments.
"Okay," Daisy says, walking over.
"Actually Daisy, I need to talk to you," Melinda says, gesturing to her room.
"Okay," Daisy says, wondering what is going on and she follows her mother into her mother's bedroom; Melinda having closed the door behind them. "If this is about whether I'm going to go to Afterlife I can't leave you now," Daisy tells her mother, as after everything that has happened there is no way in hell she can leave DC right now.
"It's not about that," Melinda tells her daughter. "But Daisy, if you want go, you should go, not worry about me," Melinda tells her daughter.
"It's not what I want, not right now," Daisy admits. "That's okay, right? I can change my mind later?" Daisy asks her mother.
"Of course," Melinda tells her.
"Cool," Daisy says, a little relieved that she was a little worried that she would be giving up her only chance. "So, if this wasn't about Afterlife, why did you want to talk to me?" Daisy asks curious.
"When I went to Phil's apartment I didn't just take two of his shirts," Melinda informs her daughter, as Daisy knows she did that.
"Okay," Daisy says, feeling a little confused.
"I also found something, and kept it to give to you," Melinda says, before opening her bedside draw and pulling out the wrapped gift she found at Phil's apartment and giving it to Daisy, who hesitantly takes it.
As she takes the present from her mother Daisy looks down and the second she does she realizes something.
"That's his writing," Daisy says, tears coming to her eyes, and even though she is a step or so away from her daughter Melinda can feel the extremely strong emotions that her daughter is feeling.
"He must have brought, and wrapped it, before going to Nevada," Melinda explains to her daughter.
"He always liked buying things early," Daisy says, foundress in her voice, as he one of her hands hesitantly holds the bow.
"Do you need a minute?" Melinda asks her daughter.
"No," Daisy answers, shaking her head.
A few minutes after Melinda and Daisy walked into Melinda's room the two of the walk out, and as they do the rest of their family notice that Daisy looks like she has been crying.
"Daze, you okay?" Kora asks concerned.
"Yeah," Daisy answers, her voice shaking a little so it is clear to everyone, not just Melinda who can feel her emotions, that she is not okay. "Food smells really good," Daisy says, clearly trying to distract from what is going on.
"Yeah, we may have gone a bit overboard," Gordon says, recognizing that his niece doesn't want to talk about whatever is going on.
"I would be very surprised if any of it went to waste," Bobbi comments, as she knows all too well how much this family can eat. "Let's get it all over to the table," Bobbi say and everyone starts to help take the food over to the table.
Even though Phil's absence is felt like a giant whole everyone, including Natasha, Clint, and Maria who arrive and join in, do their best to do what they can to assure that Daisy has an enjoyable birthday.
September 3rd 2012
Two months have passed since Daisy's seventeenth birthday and ever since she and Melinda have been taking it one day at a time to attempt to get used to their new normal; life without Phil Coulson.
Having already done Tai-Chi with her mother Daisy returned to her room to get ready and is now, fully dressed and ready, walking back into the living room where her mother is sitting on one of the stalls drinking tea.
"Do you want cereal or go to the diner?" Melinda asks her daughter.
"Cereal's fine," Daisy says, as she walks into the kitchen, basically dropping her bag as she goes.
"Daisy," Melinda says, as while her daughter isn't close enough for her to be able to feel her emotions she can tell that something is wrong with her.
Realizing there is no point in lying to her mother Daisy turns back around and leans on the bench.
"I'm a senior," Daisy says to her mother. "Today's the last first day of school I'll ever have, and Cols isn't here," Daisy explains, pain in her year. "Ever since Pre-K I would come home from school and Cols would be here, I'd tell you both all about my day; it's just going to really suck not being able to do that," Daisy admits, her voice breaking slightly.
"I know," Melinda says, getting up and walking over to her daughter, hugging her, feeling how hurt, and upset Daisy is; and more than anything she feels how much Daisy is missing Phil. "Daisy, he would be so proud of you," Melinda tells her daughter, as she knows that without a doubt.
"I just want him back," Daisy says, and Melinda can feel how much Daisy means that and it is almost a relief to Melinda as she knows that she is feeling the exact same thing and now she can really feel it.
"I know," Melinda says, as she kisses the top of her daughter's head and the two of them just stand in their apartment hugging, both thinking about, and missing, the person who means the world to both of them.