XVI

Morty's mouth flattened as chlorinated water dripped from his hair. He watched Sleepy Gary place the parasite incubator jar on the countertop with the carefree satisfaction of a proud papa.

With far less surprise, he saw Jerry behind his love punch open a can of diet cola and sip from it, absently serene.

"Is no one going to say anything?" he asked, ending in a broken squeak.

Sleepy Gary yawned, "About?..."

"The newest family member?" Morty's voice rose.

"I wasn't going to, no. But now I get the feeling I should."

"Right. Our family was done when Spike showed up months ago, then Rick brought Pencilvester to us."

Gary almost beamed, "Yes! That was a wonderful day!"

Morty glowered, "Yeah, we were all pretty happy about that and we saw what was going on when Mr. Beauregard, Mrs. Refrigerator, Cousin Nicky, and the others showed up."

"Right. We spent most of the day wondering what the heck was going on when Pencilvester showed up and decided to leave well enough alone, before Rick decided to kill everyone again," Jerry recounted, tapping his cola can with his fingers repeatedly.

"And more of the parasites started coming in from the original set the first time we hosted them," Morty agreed, "And we've all been waiting for the shoe to drop and for Rick to lose his shit and start killing everyone again, but we have contingency plans this time. So I thought we were okay. Most of us, anyway."

"And this one is going to be different?" Sleepy Gary questioned, lifting the most recent parasite spore and peering into its jar.

"It already is different," Morty lowered his voice, "Oh, it'll be Hamurai, or Tinkles, or the Bearded Lady, or the astronaut, whatever his name will end up being, but it isn't the who that bugs me."

Sleepy Gary took the jar in both hands and held it against his chest, "What then?"

Morty locked Sleepy Gary's eyes. "I can do math."

Sleepy Gary's eyes widened, "What?"

"Restoring the family took seven spores. There are eight more of the original parasites all out by the pool or in the media room with Chris. Now there's that jar."

Sleepy Gary looked quickly at Jerry and back to Morty.

"That's fifteen parasites and one spore in that jar you're holding, Uncle Gary," Morty growled.

"I…" Gary stammered, now compressing the jar in a bear hug and involuntarily retreating a step.

Morty balled his fists and advanced two steps, pointing at the jar, "Where did the sixteenth spore come from, Uncle Gary? I don't take being lied to well."

"Morty, I swear! I don't know! I didn't realize!"

Jerry stepped between his son and his fiance, "We had fifteen spores, Morty. I counted them too. I don't know where the sixteenth came from either and yeah, I admit that's a problem."

"Well, good." Morty softened, "Because I'm willing to sit down and figure this out with you, but do you want to think about what happens when Rick does a headcount? Or checks his iPad? Or whatever is inevitably going to tip him off that the goddamn parasites are out of control again?!"

Jerry swallowed hard, "No. I don't think I do."

"Well, I already have," Morty hoarsely whispered, "and we better come up with some new plans. In fact, maybe we need to implement the evacuation now. Get everybody inside."

"Now?" Jerry asked.

"Yes, now. We don't have any more spores," Morty said, then glared at Sleepy Gary, "Or so I'm told! And if I lose my family again, we can't make another. Rick finds out the supply of parasites isn't limited, he's gonna blow a gasket and there isn't going to be anyplace to hide and no time to try to get there even if there were. Get everyone inside. Now."