A/N: Again thank you so much for all the lovely comments and the support :-) It was nice to see that everyone had a different favorite part :-), mine was the part when they were struggling to reach out over the phone and then what followed when they met, the embrace, the conversation, the honesty, the vulnerability…
at Carly Fiorina I find it curious that you think I'm a student ;-), I could be 70 for all you know ha-ha ;-), I'm not but I could be ;-), let's just say I've watched all seasons of Grey's in real time, when they were actually being produced way before it became something new generations discover on Netflix ;-). But thank you for making me feel younger :-).
oh and I should inform you all that we are getting closer to the end, maybe some four or five chapters left, we'll see how many I will need to cover everything I still want to include, without dragging things and without rushing…
CHAPTER 16
WEDNESDAY CONTINUED
Arizona took a deep breath, it's not like she wasn't expecting a call into Bailey's office after what happened in the OR, she was, but she thought that maybe she would be able to avoid it until the next day. But no such luck, as soon as she and Callie came back from their lunch break at the beach, Bailey found them in the lounge and told Arizona to come to her office. Arizona straightened her coat with her hands and knocked on the door.
"Yes," she heard Bailey say and she opened the door.
"Dr. Robbins, please come in."
Arizona nodded her head and closed the door quietly.
"Please, take a seat," Bailey said pointing at the chair.
Arizona sat down and watched Bailey lean back in her chair crossing her arms, and look at Arizona intensely.
"Bailey, I'm really sor…" Arizona started.
"Uh-uh-uh," Miranda stopped her by raising her hand. She took a deep breath before she finally spoke.
"It cannot happen again," Miranda said calmly.
"It won't…," Arizona said.
"I can't have my star surgeons acting like that, you're supposed to be an example to interns and residents, besides Arizona you're part owner of this hospital, you're sitting on the board, I shouldn't be telling you that! Imagine if any other surgeon in this hospital behaved like that, would you be happy with such behavior as a member of the Board?" Bailey said with a sigh.
"No, of course not, I know it was really unprofessional and I tried to be professional but she just kept on going."
Miranda raised her hand again to prevent Arizona from talking.
"I understand but you have to understand that we have to take some measures, you're a member of the Board, you cannot act like that in the OR, and you cannot get away with acting like that."
Arizona sighed, "Right, yes of course you are right."
"The Board will meet later today to decide on what will happen, we cannot suspend you because you have numerous prenatal surgeries scheduled and you are the only surgeon who can perform them so it will most probably be a financial fine unless we come up with something more creative."
"Right, okay."
"Callie of course will not be in the meeting."
Arizona nodded her head.
"Now all that said, let me also point out how proud of you I am for handling the surgery so well under the circumstances."
Arizona smiled, "Thank you, Bailey, it wasn't easy though."
"I can imagine… you did great, and also as your friend I am glad you put that woman in her place," Miranda said, a satisfied smile covering her face.
Arizona laughed and nodded her head.
"And I apologize for giving her privileges, I denied the first time but she pulled some serious strings and I couldn't continue saying no."
"It's okay, Miranda, really, this visit as intense as it was has actually helped me and Callie work our way through the past."
"Oh, that's great then, I'm glad," Miranda smiled. "Well, Dr. Boswell should be out of your way now, that has been taken care of."
"Oh?" Arizona said raising her eyebrows.
"Dr. Webber and I pulled some strings too, and found out that Dr. Boswell already has a restraining order incident in another hospital that she managed to keep away from her professional file, I made sure she understood that if she ever bothered you again that incident would see the light of day as well as the one that happened here."
Arizona looked shockingly at Bailey. "You don't pull strings for things like this."
"Nobody acts like that in my OR with a patient open on the table! Especially not with my surgeons!"
"Right… thank you," Arizona said and smiled.
"So, was it bad?" Callie asked when Arizona came back to the lounge.
"No, actually not at all, the Board is meeting later today to decide what to do, I will probably get a financial fine since I'm the VIP surgeon in this hospital so they cannot afford to suspend me," Arizona explained in a teasingly boastful tone.
"They are going to punish you?!" Callie said completely taken by surprise.
"Well to be fair, they should, as chief of fetal surgery, not to mention a member of the Board I'm supposed to offer exemplary behavior to interns and residents."
"Hmm…" Callie mumbled curling her nose, not convinced.
The door opened and Amelia came in. "Is it true, did you really stab her with the scalpel!?"
Arizona raised her eyebrows in shock, "What!?"
"Now that would be worthy of a fine!" Callie pointed out.
Arizona looked at her, "That would have been jail time!"
"Jail?" Maggie asked in shock as she entered the room as well. "Oh my God, are you going to jail for punching her, how's your hand?" she asked looking at Arizona's hand.
Callie burst into laughter, "Nothing beats this hospital!"
"What are you two talking about?" Arizona asked with eyes wide from surprise, she turned to Amelia "I didn't stab her with a scalpel!" and then to Maggie "And I didn't punch her!, I just yelled at her."
"Really? Only that?" Maggie said, disappointment clear in her voice.
"Yeah, that's disappointing, I heard there was blood," Amelia agreed.
Arizona shook her head, "Well I am sorry to disappoint you all. At least Bailey was proud of me! I'm going back to my patients!"
Callie laughed out loud, "For the record I think you were really badass in there! Even without stabbing and punching!" she yelled after her.
Several hours later Arizona was putting on her jacket getting ready to go home when Meredith entered the lounge.
"So that was a hell of a day for you?"
"Yeah! Tell me about it? Which version did you hear? Did I maybe chop her finger off?"
Meredith looked at her with horror and a completely confused look on her face. "I have just come out of a four hour long surgery."
"Oh, so how do you know what happened?"
"Because I was up there in the gallery with Callie, I saw it live and it was really cool, you were badass!"
Arizona laughed out loud. "Thank you!
"Amelia and Maggie were disappointed there was no blood," she added and chuckled.
"What!?"
"Different versions of the truth have been circling the hospital, each more bloody than the other," Arizona clarified.
"This hospital is crazy…" Meredith said shaking her head in disbelief.
"Yeah…"
"So, how are you doing, considering everything?" Meredith asked observing Arizona.
"I'm exhausted, I just want to forget about these two days, I want to go home, snuggle with Callie and Sofia… and just move on with my life."
"Would you like a day off tomorrow?" Meredith asked.
"Huh?"
"If you could get a day off tomorrow, would you like it?"
"Oh God, a day off would be perfect but several patients are coming in tomorrow, and I have to get them settled and talk to them about the schedule for their surgeries, about the tests that will be done over the next few days as we prep them for everything, I cannot take a day off."
"Hmm, too bad, well I think you should consider some days off soon, both you and Callie, it's been quite intense lately for both of you."
"Yeah you are right, thanks for suggesting that."
"Okay, I gotta go, so see you tomorrow then," Meredith said with a smile.
"See you tomorrow."
Meredith opened the door and came face to face with Callie.
"All yours," she teased and winked at Callie walking past her. Callie laughed and entered the room.
"Hey, any news from the Board?" she asked walking over.
"No, the meeting is at 6:30 p.m., Bailey told me she'll let me know," Arizona smiled and leaned forward to meet Callie's lips.
"How was the rest of your day? Any more crazy theories?" Callie chuckled.
Arizona shook her head, "I've stopped paying attention to it, I just want to get out of the hospital and forget about it all.
Callie smiled, "Okay, let's take our daughter to the beach then…"
"No, I disagree," Meredith resolutely declared. "It makes no sense! Why would she pay for a situation that she handled perfectly well? This woman came into her OR, disrupted her work and walked out of this hospital like nothing happened and now we will make Arizona pay for what that woman did? You want to punish her for yelling at her!? She kept things under control!"
"We cannot allow Board members to act like that inside the OR!" Catherine exclaimed.
"Oh, please, everybody in this hospital has yelled at some point in the OR, or in the hallways, and frankly Catherine, you have gotten away with a lot of things yourself, and nobody has ever punished you!"
Catherine squinted her eyes angrily, Jackson chuckled in amusement while Webber cleared his throat and asked.
"Okay, do you have any other idea, Meredith?"
"Give her a day off!"
"What!? You want us to reward her!" Catherine said raising her voice.
"Yes, exactly! You can make it look like a suspension for a day without it going into her file and let her spend time with her daughter, or go to a spa or do whatever she wants to relax."
"She has a busy schedule…," Bailey started explaining.
"I checked her schedule, tomorrow she is supposed to receive new patients, settle them in and explain what will be happening over the next few days, any resident can do that. She can visit them all on Friday and explain more details if needed."
"Hmmm…." Bailey commented as she opened Arizona's schedule.
"Fine by me," Richard said.
"Richard!" Catherine protested.
"She's been through enough, and she did handle the situation amazingly well, kept the surgery under control, called for backup when she realized she needed help, and from what I heard the woman deserved at least a punch in the face if not a scalpel wound. So she yelled a bit, but rightfully so."
"I agree, no damage was done, the patient was number one priority, one day suspension is fine by me."
Bailey nodded her head, "Okay, I second that, it's four to one, even if you oppose Catherine you are outvoted."
"Well, for the record, I do oppose… and Jackson if you keep on running the hospital like this you won't be sitting on this Board for long!" Catherine said and cut off her call.
Meredith smiled, "Good, can I let her know?"
Miranda nodded her head with a smile.
"Good job, Dr. Grey, nice to see that my surgeons have each other's back."
"You taught us well, Bailey," Meredith smiled and got up taking her phone and heading out.
"You missy are going straight to the bathtub now to get rid of all that sand, and we need to get it out of your sneakers as well so no getting around the apartment until we do that," Callie explained taking Sofia's right sneaker carefully off.
"I had fun at the beach!" Sofia commented with excitement holding on to Arizona standing on one leg as Callie emptied the sand into the trash bin.
"Me too!" Arizona happily said.
"Okay, other foot," Callie said and Sofia switched legs and let Callie take off the other sneaker.
"Can we do that again soon, mama?"
"Sure honey, we can do that every weekend."
"If we do that every weekend our bathroom drain will get clogged by all the sand you will bring here," Callie joked as she took Sofia in her arms.
Arizona laughed wholeheartedly, "I think mommy is right Sofia."
"I am throwing you straight into the bathtub," Callie said as Sofia giggled happily.
"See you later mama," she said as she wrapped her arms around Callie's neck and Arizona waved at her with a smile. She washed her hands and started preparing dinner.
Twenty minutes later she was finishing dinner while Callie was still with Sofia in the bathroom when her phone rang.
"Hey, you're the bearer of bad news?"
Meredith laughed, "I'm the bearer of good news."
"Huh?" Arizona asked puzzled.
"I got you your day off tomorrow."
"What do you mean a day off?"
"I suggested we give you one day of suspension without it going into your record, so basically giving you a day off that will be called a one day suspension just so that it doesn't seem to others that we are rewarding you for the behavior in the OR."
"Really?"
"Yes really, you said a day off would be nice."
"Oh wow, thank you Meredith!" Arizona laughed, "So others went with it?"
"It wasn't difficult to get Bailey, Richard and Jackson on board, Catherine was against, but you know her," Meredith said rolling her eyes.
"You rolled your eyes didn't you?" Arizona said through laughter.
Meredith laughed, "It just bugs me that she thinks rules apply to other people but not her, but anyway, enjoy your day, relax, go to a spa, or spend it with Sofia, whatever you want."
"Oh God, I so needed this, thank you so much! But what about my patients, I have so many things to do tomorrow!"
"Oh please, residents can set everything up for your new patients, you can talk to all of them on Friday."
Arizona smiled, "Thank you."
"You're welcome, enjoy the evening with your girls."
"I will, you too with your family."
"Thanks, see you on Friday."
"Yes, see you on Friday" Arizona said and ended the call while inhaling slowly, "This is perfect," she whispered.
"What is perfect?" Callie asked appearing behind her and wrapping her arms around her waist.
"Where's Sofia?" Arizona whispered.
"She's putting away her toys, we have a few moments" Callie said as she leaned forward and kissed Arizona softly. She let her fingers trail along Arizona's waist before letting her go and stepping back.
"So what is perfect?" she asked taking a bite of the food.
"Meredith got me a day off with the Board," Arizona said with a smile.
Callie tilted her head questioningly, "A day off?"
"Yeah, a day off tomorrow that will be officially called a day of suspension but without going into my record."
"Now that's what I'm talking about! You don't punish your staff for handling the situation as well as you did."
Arizona smiled, "Oh, I really need that day, just to take a few moments to breathe, and let go of these two days and just reset myself. Can you take a day off? We could go to a spa?" Arizona asked with pleading eyes.
"Argh, I would love that, but I have two surgeries tomorrow, I can't postpone them."
Arizona made a sad face, "Oh well…, too bad…, well Sofia could skip school tomorrow, no? We could go to the park, go have some ice-cream, maybe go to the science museum…" she listed things smiling dreamily.
"Honey, we're not gonna make her skip school so you can take her on a fun day."
Arizona pouted, "Right…"
"Heeey, just take this day for yourself, relax, go for a walk, let your emotions settle down and just enjoy breathing and being at peace."
"Hmm, okay, you have a point."
"Oh and think of me of course," Callie said with a sheepish smile on her face.
Arizona smiled broadly, "I always think of you…" she said putting her right hand on Callie's back leaning forward giving Callie a tender kiss." Let's set the table and then I want my family snuggle time, has Sofia chosen a movie?"
"Yep, we are watching Zootopia," Callie informed.
"Oh, again?!"
Callie laughed, "Yeah, but at least it's not Frozen again."
"Right," Arizona laughed.
After dinner Arizona and Callie each showered and then they all snuggled up on the couch to watch the movie. The snuggle didn't last long though as Sofia was clapping and jumping up and down with excitement at her favorite scenes.
"How does she have this much energy at the end of the day?" Arizona wondered and Callie laughed.
"Torres genes," she said with a wink and Arizona laughed out loud knowing that Callie was insinuating at her own energy levels in the evening.
When the cartoon was over Callie said "Time for bed, honey."
"Mama, will you be here in the morning when I wake up?" she asked Arizona.
"Yes, sweetheart, I will be here," Arizona replied with a smile as Sofia hugged her, cuddling in her arms for a few moments.
Arizona ran her hand up and down Sofia's back softly as she kissed her on the cheek several times.
"I like having breakfast together," Sofia said and kissed Arizona's cheek.
"Me too, sweetheart," Arizona said happily.
Callie smiled and said "Okay, sweetie, let's go."
"Good night, mama, see you in the morning."
"Sweet dreams honey," Arizona said softly as Callie picked Sofia up in her arms.
Sofia placed her head on Callie's shoulder and waved at Arizona who smiled and waved back. When they disappeared from her vision Arizona sighed happily and took off her prosthetic leg before lying back on the couch. She started flipping through a list of movies looking for something they could watch while waiting for Callie to come back from Sofia's room.
"Found anything?" Callie asked as she entered the room.
"Not yet," Arizona answered moving to the left to give Callie room to slide next to her.
"I heard this beautiful song today and it reminded me of us," Callie said pressing play on her phone and lay down next to Arizona wrapping her arms around her from below. Arizona placed her head on Callie's shoulder and wrapped her left arm around Callie's waist as the song started to play.
Come by the fire
Lay down your head
My love I see you're growing tired
So set the bad day by the bed
And rest a while
Your eyes can close
You don't have to do a thing
But listen to me sing I know
You miss the world
The one you knew
The one where everything made sense
Because you didn't know the truth
That's how it works
Till the bottom drops out
And you learn
We're all just hunters seeking solid ground
Don't stop
Trying to find me here amidst the chaos
Though I know it's blinding
There's a way out
Say out loud
We will not give up on love now
No fear
Don't you turn like Orpheus
Just stay here
Hold me in the dark and when the day appears
We'll say
We did not give up on love today
"It's beautiful…" Arizona whispered while caressing Callie's side.
"Yeah…" Callie said and placed a soft kiss on Arizona's forehead as the song went on.
I'll show you good
Restore your faith
I'll try and somehow make a meaning of the poison in this place
Convince you love, don't breathe it in
You were written in the stars that we are swimming in
And it has no name
No guarantee
It's just the promise of a day
I know that some may never see
But that's enough
If the bottom drops out
I hope my love was someone else's solid ground
Don't stop
Trying to find me here amidst the chaos
Though I know it's blinding
There's a way out
Say out loud
We will not give up on love now
No fear
Don't you turn like Orpheus
Just stay here
Hold me in the dark and when the day appears
We'll say
We did not give up on love today
We'll say
We did not give up on love today
When the song ended Arizona lifted her head and looked at Callie as a tear rolled down her cheek. Callie wiped it off tenderly with her right thumb and smiled with tears in her eyes as well.
"No fear…" Arizona whispered.
"No fear," Callie repeated and moved forward to let their lips tenderly caress each other in a soft and slow kiss.
Arizona moved her head up to make their eyes meet, "Thank you for not giving up on our love," she said.
Callie smiled, "You never gave up, I think your heart kept on calling me to come back."
"I couldn't give up, I tried, but yes my heart was not letting me…"
"My heart listened to your heart," Callie whispered and smiled softly. "I love you," she said as she traced her fingers over Arizona's lips.
Arizona smiled, "I love you too," she whispered back and lowered her head to meet Callie's lips again while her left palm caressed Callie's right cheek.
She placed her head back on Callie's shoulder and let out a soft, happy sigh.
"This is nice…" Arizona whispered, "just being…, here…, in your arms…" she said as she started paying more attention to the other song that was already playing on Callie's phone.
"That's also a nice song," she commented.
"Yeah, it's called Saint Honesty, the same artist, Sara Bareilles," Callie explained.
Arizona listened to the lyrics and propped herself up on her right elbow to look at Callie a bit surprised, "That's a perfect description of what we went through yesterday," she said.
Callie nodded her head, "Right, no? I thought the same thing…"
"I feel like this song is embracing us and telling us that everything will be fine…" Arizona said and pause a bit, "plus it seems like a great make-out song…, I can imagine candles, wine, open fire…" she added with a seductive smile.
Callie laughed, "So you don't want to watch a movie anymore?"
Arizona shook her head slowly, "I think you should put those two songs on repeat and kiss my lips all evening."
"It's already on repeat," Callie smiled as she slowly pulled Arizona close to her and pushed her body lightly against Arizona flipping her over and making her lie on her back as she moved on top while her lips caressed Arizona's lips and her fingers got entangled inside Arizona's hair. Arizona smiled and wrapped her arms around Callie's back and let herself get lost in the beautiful sensation of their lips dancing to the music.
THURSDAY
Arizona was sitting in a café on the waterfront, sipping coffee. She leaned her head back and closed her eyes letting the warm rays of sunshine caress her face.
A waitress approached her and broke her moment of bliss.
"The lady over there asked if you would like another coffee," the waitress said with a smile.
Arizona looked in the direction the waitress pointed to and saw a woman waving and smiling at her, but she didn't react.
"Please thank her for me but I was just about to leave," she replied to the waitress, paid for her coffee and got up. "Have a nice day," she said and headed to the beach.
As she was walking a weird sensation appeared in her stomach and she didn't like it, she felt nervous, and angry, and afraid... She took a deep breath trying to stabilize herself. What is going on…? she thought puzzled by the emotions that suddenly overwhelmed her. After walking for a few minutes she found a bench and sat down, she closed her eyes but suddenly images of her with Boswell in the on-call room started appearing in front of her eyes so she opened them in shock as her heart started beating faster in her chest and taking air in became a bit of a struggle. Am I having a panic attack? she wondered trying to make herself breathe slowly and deeply. She focused on her breathing counting the inhales and the exhales as she felt her body start to relax slowly. She imagined Sofia smiling at her and her face formed a smile as well. Then she imagined taking Sofia's hand and she calmed down completely.
She took a deep breath and got up to continue walking towards the beach. When she got there she smiled, this beach now reminded her of Callie and she imagined Callie's arms around her body as she stood there looking at the surface of the water. She started walking but became restless again as images from the last two days found their way back into her head and affected her body. Boswell in the elevator… the pain on Callie's face when she saw them… the emotions she felt when Callie thought she betrayed her trust again… the helplessness she felt thinking that she had lost Callie… everything she saw in Callie's eyes when Callie took her back to that on-call room… and then their difficult conversation about the past… the anger in the OR… everything came rushing back overwhelming her. I need to keep myself busy, there's not going to be any peace and calm today, she thought as she turned around and headed back to her car.
She spent the rest of her day cleaning around the house, doing laundry, made herself go to the shop twice just to have something to do. It was almost 8 pm and she was getting ready to empty the cupboard in the kitchen and clean it from top to bottom when her phone rang.
"Hey, are you not coming tonight, Sofia has been asking about you, have you decided to stay in the spa forever?"
Arizona laughed even though her mood was much different. "I didn't even go to the spa…"
"Really? How come?"
"I just…" Arizona started but words got stuck in her throat as the thoughts started coming back to her mind.
"Arizona, are you okay?"
"Yeah, just still overwhelmed about everything, when I had time to think a lot of emotions hit me today and it wasn't very pleasant. I was just getting ready to clean the cupboard just so I don't think about any of these things."
"Honey, you shouldn't be alone, come here, that's what girlfriends are for, to hold you when something's wrong."
Arizona smiled, "That's sweet but Calliope I can't spend every night at your apartment…"
"Okay, tomorrow we'll come to your house," Callie teased making Arizona laugh.
"You know that's not what I meant," Arizona commented.
"I know, but these past days have been really tough and I would really like to have you by my side, we can spend less time together next week but I don't want to be alone tonight and I don't think you want to be alone either."
Arizona sighed.
"No fear, remember," Callie said.
Arizona smiled, "Okay, no fear," she repeated. "I'll take a shower and come down there."
"Sofia will already be asleep by then, come now and you can tuck her in and then take a shower here… we could even take a bath together, your own private spa experience."
Arizona smiled, "Okay, you just bought me with the spa experience."
"And there I thought you would come because you wanted to see me," Callie said with a sad tone.
"The allure of the spa experience is all about you being naked with me in the bathtub," Arizona explained.
"Oh, okay then," Callie said cheerfully.
"I thought that was a given…"
"I just…, well you know, you didn't feel like coming today so I immediately felt a bit insecure…" Callie admitted.
Arizona sighed, "I guess we both still have things to work on…"
"Yeah," Callie agreed.
"I'll be there soon," Arizona said.
"Okay, see you soon," Callie replied and ended the call.
When Callie opened the door Sofia ran into Arizona's arms. "Mama, I thought you would not come, I missed you."
"See, I told you mama was coming," Callie said softly.
"Oh, sweetheart, I was just busy and I didn't even realize it was already so late," Arizona said placing a kiss on Sofia's cheek.
"Can we color some books before going to bed?" Sofia asked.
"It's already getting late sweetheart," Callie informed looking at the clock.
"Just a little bit, I haven't seen mama the whole day," Sofia said sadly.
"Oh baby…, come on, ten minutes and then we are going to bed," Arizona said softly and took Sofia to the couch.
"You seem tired," she said looking at Callie.
"I am exhausted, I spent the whole shift in surgeries," Callie explained stretching her arms upwards.
"Mama you color this one, and I will color this side," Sofia interrupted as Arizona's eyes were just about to get lost in the sight of Callie's body stretching in front of her.
"Okay," Arizona said and started coloring as Callie sat down next to them lifting her legs up and rubbing her temples.
"So how was your day, honey," Arizona asked, "Did you have fun at school?"
"Yes, we danced, and played hide and seek and we went outside after lunch. What did you do mama?"
Arizona smiled, "I had coffee in the sun and then walked on the beach a bit and then I did a lot of cleaning around the house, and a lot of grocery shopping."
"Can we go to the beach again this weekend or to the park?" Sofia asked.
"Yes of course honey, if the weather is nice we will definitely go to the park, how about we take Zola as well and maybe also go to the science museum."
"Yay! That would be great!"
"Okay, then we will do that," Arizona said with a smile and placed her arm around Sofia who yawned.
"I think it's time for bed after all sweetie, look your eyes are closing, come on, let's put this away and I'll tuck you in," Arizona said rubbing Sofia's back.
"Okay," Sofia said and put away the pencils while Arizona folded the coloring books and put them aside.
"Well done, now kiss mommy goodnight and let's go."
Callie smiled and took Sofia in her arms, "Good night honey," she said kissing her on the cheek.
"Good night mommy," Sofia said wrapping her little arms around Callie's neck and giving her a kiss before heading to her room.
"Why don't you start the bath while I tuck her in, and I'll join you later," Arizona whispered and Callie nodded her head with a smile.
Arizona followed Sofia to her room while Callie headed to the bathroom. She filled the tub with warm water, added some Lavender bath salt, and lit up some candles, she put on soothing nature sounds and got inside the tub letting out a long exhale as her body started to relax.
Fifteen minutes later Arizona came inside, she sat on the bathtub and leaned forward to kiss Callie softly, "Would you like some wine?" she asked.
"Mmmm, yes that would be nice," Callie replied with a smile.
"Okay, I'll be right back."
Arizona went to the kitchen and poured two glasses of red wine. She turned off the lights in the kitchen and the living room and headed back to the bathroom. She handed Callie her glass and smiled at her before clinking their glasses.
"To home spa," Arizona said with a smile.
"Cheers to that," Callie smiled, "Come on, join me…" Callie said as she placed her glass on the little table on the side.
Arizona put down her glass as well and took off her clothes, she sat down on the edge of the bathtub with her right leg inside while Callie took her prosthetic leg off and then placed her hands on each side of Arizona's waist helping her lower her body into the tub. Arizona leaned back on Callie as the warm water covered her body.
"Ohh, this is nice," she said with a long exhale. "I should have gone to that spa today…" she whispered.
"Why didn't you?" Callie asked as she pushed waves of water lightly over Arizona's shoulders.
"Oh just being alone with my thoughts wasn't a good idea, all the emotions from the past two days came rushing back in and it was overwhelming, so I realized that a spa would have done the same, I preferred keeping myself busy instead."
"Do you want to talk about those emotions?"
"Would it be okay if I say no?" Arizona said turning around to look at Callie.
Callie smiled, "Of course."
"I just… I just don't want to think about any of that tonight, I just want to relax in your arms and enjoy this moment."
"Okay," Callie whispered as their lips met.
Arizona turned around and leaned back on Callie again. "So your day was tough as well?"
"Oh God, I had two of my scheduled surgeries and then an emergency with multiple fractures came in, I didn't leave the OR the whole day, I'm exhausted."
"I'm glad you suggested a bath, we both really needed this," Arizona said and took a sip of her wine.
"Mm-hmm," Callie mumbled letting the relaxation take over her body. They stayed like that, not talking, enjoying the silence and just being close to each other.
Arizona caressed Callie's leg and enjoyed feeling their bodies move in unison with every breath as she got lost in thoughts.
"Where are you?" Callie asked after a while.
"Hmmm…." Arizona mumbled.
"I can hear you think," Callie said.
Arizona laughed, "Yeah…, still a lot of things in my head."
"Let them go for tonight…" Callie whispered.
"Right…" Arizona said pensively as she started caressing Callie's leg again helping her relax even more.
After a few minutes she heard Callie's breathing even out a bit too much.
"Are you falling asleep?" she asked.
"Mmm, almost…" Callie mumbled.
"We should go to bed…"
"Yeah, maybe that would be best, the water is getting colder anyway…"
Arizona turned around and kissed Callie before she got up.
Twenty minutes later they were lying in bed, caressing each other as Callie was slowly drifting into sleep.
"Callie," Arizona whispered.
"Hmmm…" Callie mumbled dreamily.
"I really loved when you said that's what girlfriends are for on the phone this evening. I loved hearing that word again."
Callie smiled but didn't open her eyes, "Wow it's been so long since we were girlfriends, I really loved telling everyone you were my girlfriend back in the days."
"Does that mean you preferred girlfriend to wife?" Arizona asked with a bit of hesitation.
"Not necessarily," Callie said with a smile, her eyes still closed.
"Good to know," Arizona whispered and smiled as she kissed Callie.
Callie smiled and whispered, "Good night, girlfriend."
Arizona laughed, "Sweet dreams, babe."
NEXT DAY (FRIDAY)
"Are we gonna have lunch today?" Callie asked putting the lid on her now filled travel coffee mug.
When there was no reply Callie lifted her eyes and looked at Arizona who was playing with her coffee and drawing circles on a piece of paper.
"What's going on?" Callie asked getting closer to Arizona.
"Hmmm?" Arizona mumbled lost in thoughts.
"Something's going on with you, you seem distant, and you seemed distant last night too."
Arizona sighed and looked at Callie, "Yeah, I umm… my…" she started but was interrupted by Callie's pager going off.
Callie looked at it, "I need to rush to the hospital…" she looked back at Arizona, "you were saying?"
"Oh, I'll tell you later this evening, over wine."
Callie smiled, "Fine, but are you okay?"
"Yeah, yeah, everything is fine, don't worry," Arizona smiled and placed her right palm on Callie's cheek giving her a kiss, "Go! I'll take Sofia to school."
"Okay, see you later," Callie said and rushed out.
Arizona's eyes followed Callie out and when the door closed they moved to the left and for a few seconds stayed focused on the calendar which was hanging next to the door. She let out a long sigh and stood up.
"Sofia, come on honey, time to go!" she called and walked over to Sofia's room.
Several hours later Arizona was getting out of her car when she heard her phone ping. She took it and put it on silent before she opened a message from Callie.
What about lunch then, you never answered me this morning? ;-)
Well that's because you got paged and rushed out of the apartment ;-), I am about to enter Dr. Brown's office so it will have to be dinner :-) Arizona typed back and put her phone back into her bag.
She took a deep breath and entered inside offering a stiff smile to her therapist.
"Bad day?" Dr. Brown immediately asked seeing Arizona.
"You know me so well…" Arizona laughed and sat down, "Bad days," she said and sighed.
"More than one?" Dr. Brown commented with surprise. "What happened?"
Arizona exhaled heavily, "A lot…"
"Is everything okay with you and Callie?"
"Oh, yes we are great," Arizona laughed nervously, "considering everything that has happened we are doing really great."
"So tell me what happened?"
"The woman I slept with showed up, and tried to kiss me, and Callie saw that and it brought on this whole storm from the past."
"Oh!" Dr. Brown exclaimed with surprise, "That must have been hard."
"Yeah, it was… but we have managed to work it out, we have talked about a lot of painful things from the past and it hasn't broken us," Arizona smiled.
"That is amazing, well done!" Dr. Brown smiled, "See how much progress you are both making, you didn't even come running here to solve the issues, you sat down and dealt with the hard stuff on your own."
Arizona smiled, "Yes, I am really happy with how we managed to do that."
"Okay, so what is the problem then if everything with Callie is going in the right direction even with some really tough obstacles?"
"I… umm… in the past two days I've been thinking a lot about everything that happened, and thinking about me… it has brought all these thoughts to surface…and emotions, I think I had a bit of a panic attack yesterday… I managed to get them under control with the techniques you taught me but the thoughts… they are still there and I'm afraid…"
"Okay…, what thoughts about you?"
"I'm wondering if I'm sending the wrong signals, why did she feel like she could even get close to me, let alone kiss me… I just spoke her name surprised to see her, that's the only thing I said, was my body flirting with her, is that what I do, is that who I am…? Maybe cheating is in my blood, maybe that's simply who I am…?"
"Arizona, did you want to kiss her in those moments?"
"No! It never even crossed my mind!"
"So why are you questioning yourself?"
"I don't know, I'm just baffled that she thought it would be okay to come close and try to kiss me… so I'm thinking it must be something in me, I must have given her some kind of a signal that made her feel it was okay to lean forward and kiss me."
"But she didn't kiss you?"
"No, no, I stopped her but she shouldn't have gotten close in the first place."
"So you think it was your fault that she approached you."
"Yes, I obviously have this it's okay, you can come closer kind of energy, and I want you to help me change that, I'm afraid I'm going to cheat again unless I change this..."
"Arizona," Dr. Brown said softly, "You just told me you didn't want to kiss that woman."
"I didn't, I just want Callie, I just want to kiss her, I don't want anyone else!"
"So why this fear that you will cheat again?"
"I don't know! I just feel so insecure, and afraid that I'm going to mess everything up again… I can't mess everything up again, I don't want to!"
"Arizona…" Dr. Brown called tilting her head to the left, looking closely at Arizona waiting for her to lift her head. When Arizona finally did their eyes met and Dr. Brown smiled.
"I know what date is coming soon," she said softly.
Arizona closed her eyes and exhaled slowly.
"It's time…" Dr. Brown continued in soothing voice.
Arizona shook her head in denial, "I don't think I'm ready…" she whispered.
"You will never be ready… But if you really want your fresh start with Callie, you need to close this chapter, it's time to close it Arizona, it's time to face it… you feel like this because you want to run from that pain again, it's coming closer and closer and you have the urge to run from it, it's time to stop running…"
"I… ummm…" Arizona tried speaking as her eyes welled with tears, she nodded her head silently.
"I can go with you if you want," Dr. Brown offered.
Arizona shook her head into a no. "I… I was thinking of bringing Callie and Sofia."
"Sofia shouldn't see you like that..." Dr. Brown said softly.
"Right…" Arizona nodded her head distantly.
"Can some other friend come with you and look after Sofia until the first wave of emotions has passed?"
Arizona nodded her head, "We might be able to arrange someone else to come."
"Okay. Then that would be best for Sofia. Are you sure you want to do this without me?"
Arizona nodded her head, "I know what's going to happen, and how I'm going to feel, I just don't want to feel it…, so the only thing to do is let myself feel it and Callie will be there to help me through it."
"Okay, well I have a weekend conference in the area in two weeks, if you can organize your trip at that time I can be available to help, just in case."
"Okay, maybe that's a good idea, I like having that option just in case..."
"Good, and I would also like to talk to Callie about this, if I'm not there I need to explain some things to her, give her some pointers, is that okay with you?"
"Okay, yes sure, no problem," Arizona nodded her head and got up to leave.
"Arizona," Dr. Brown stopped her, "You've had a rush of all sorts of emotions this week and now they are getting mixed with the intensity that you still need to face. You might feel overwhelmed over the next few days, come see me again if needed."
Arizona nodded her head, "I'll let you know and confirm the date for the trip," she managed to say before she quickly exited the office. She had already started feeling like she couldn't breathe and she didn't want to talk about any of it anymore.
She stepped out of the building and inhaled deeply, looking up into the sky. She closed her eyes and shook her head trying to stop her tears from welling up. I still have the rest of my shift in front of me, so, no crying… she thought and took her phone out to distract herself. There was a new message from Callie and she opened it with a smile.
"Ahhh, okay, well Meredith just asked if Sofia could come play with Zola today, you wanna have a date, at Joe's after work? :-)
Arizona smiled, That would be nice, see you there then :-).
Arizona finished her shift and was sitting at the bar, waiting for Callie, lost in thoughts. A woman approached her.
"I haven't seen you around," the woman said and moved closer.
"I don't come here often," Arizona said and looked at her phone.
"You have pretty eyes," the woman said with a smile. "I would like to buy you a drink," she offered.
Arizona took a breath. "Thank you but I already have a drink and I'm waiting for my girlfriend so I'm sorry but I'm not interested," she explained politely.
The woman nodded her head, "Too bad," she said and left to the other side of the bar.
Arizona closed her eyes and exhaled deeply when Callie appeared behind her.
"Hey, stranger," she said and leaned over Arizona's back and shoulder and placed a kiss on Arizona's cheek.
"I wasn't flirting with her," Arizona explained in panicky tone, "She just came here and started flirting with me…"
Callie opened her eyes wide.
"Arizona, relax, I don't think you were flirting with her."
"So why did she approach, am I sending some signals to women, is that why they go after me?" Arizona babbled.
Callie laughed wholeheartedly.
"This is not funny, Calliope. Maybe I am sending some flirting signals and they think it's okay to approach me, I should be sending the step away I'm taken kind of signal."
Callie leaned forward and gave Arizona a passionate kiss.
"There, now they will get the message that you are mine."
Arizona smiled "I like that, but seriously still, what is it about me that women just always come to me?"
"Honey, you are beautiful, and sexy and when you appear with that beautiful blond head of yours and put on your magical smile heads turn, and as far as I'm concerned they can look as much as they want because my hand is still the one that's wrapped around your waist", Callie said squeezing Arizona's waist tightly.
"Yeah, well, that one over there doesn't seem driven away, she seems like she is planning to come over here and it is annoying, I feel like they are reminding me of being a cheater!"
Callie opened her mouth but didn't know what to say.
"What if it's who I am? What if I do it again? Maybe it's in my blood. What if a woman goes after me and I cheat again, and I ruin us completely, maybe that's who I am, a cheater and what if it cannot change?"
Arizona said all in one breath, standing up and storming off to the bathroom.
Callie stood there baffled for a second by what had just happened but then she composed herself and went after Arizona.
Callie entered the bathroom and found Arizona facing a mirror, wiping her eyes. Callie smiled remembering the first time they met right here in this same room.
She looked at Arizona and said. "Dr. Robbins, right, fetal surgeon?"
Arizona lifted her eyes and met Callie's in the mirror. "Callie, what are you…"
"I'm Calliope Torres, ortho surgery. I've seen you at the hospital. Are you okay?"
Arizona turned around slowly, "Calliope…"
"People talk, where we work, they talk… a lot," Callie continued. "So for the sake of being honest, I think I should tell you that I know things about you, because people talk."
Arizona inhaled deeply and smiled.
"It's just you look upset, and I just wanted to tell you that the talk is good."
"Yeah right", Arizona said and scoffed sarcastically.
"Well, not all the talk but hey, we all make mistakes, and people like you, in spite of the mistakes, they like you. And women are still lined up for you because they like you."
"I don't want other women…," Arizona said directing her eyes at the floor.
"Oh, no?" Callie asked getting a step closer.
Arizona shook her head, lifted her eyes and looked at Callie, "No, I only care what one person thinks. I only want one woman."
"Oh, and who might that be?"
Arizona smiled "She's this gorgeous and hot ortho surgeon, an amazing woman whose presence causes butterflies in my stomach."
"Really, well that is good, no?"
"Yes, that is great," Arizona nodded her head wiping her left eye.
"Well, luckily I know what this hot surgeon thinks," Callie said coming another step closer to Arizona. "And let me tell you, your presence causes butterflies in her stomach as well."
"Yeah?" Arizona asked wiping her right eye.
"Uh-huh," Callie added and placed her hands around Arizona's waist. "If I do this…" Callie smiled and leaned forward, she placed her right hand on Arizona's cheek and kissed her lips softly, then she took Arizona's right hand and placed it on her own abdomen.
"Butterflies…, of all sizes and colors", she said with a smile.
Arizona smiled, "I love you," she whispered.
"I love you too," Callie said before she kissed her again and then took Arizona's hands and asked.
"Something else is going on, what brought on all these self-doubts?"
Arizona shook her head getting teary eyed again.
"Arizona," Callie said softly, "we said we would be honest with each other about everything and I know you… something else is going on."
Arizona nodded her head through tears but could not speak.
"I need a second", she whispered trying to breathe through the tears.
Callie pulled Arizona into a close embrace.
"Okay, breathe honey, breathe," she said caressing Arizona's back and holding her close for a few moments feeling her breath slowly come back to normal.
Arizona leaned backwards and whispered, "Thank you", while wiping her tears off.
Callie smiled.
Arizona took a deep breath, "It's time…", she said.
Callie looked questioningly at her.
"Remember the thing about my brother I said I wasn't ready to face?"
Callie nodded her head.
"It's time to face it…", Arizona said as Callie squeezed her hand.
"Okay", Callie said softly, "why don't we go for a walk and you tell me about it?"
"Yeah, let's go for a walk, I could use some air."
A/N: at TingTorn78 originally I did consider a Callie-Boswell confrontation, I was considering two options, Bailey taking care of it or Callie confronting her, but in order for that to work I would have had to make Callie some sort of a bully, and I don't like any type of bullying so I just abandoned it and went with Bailey…
I never planned to use any songs in the chapters but a few days ago I heard those two songs for the first time and they both reminded me of Calzona :-) *heart* and I felt they fit perfectly with what I was writing for them lately so the scene of them snuggled up to the song Orpheus just came to me… BTW, I think Orpheus is one of the most beautiful songs I have ever heard... and guess what the name of Orpheus's mom was - Calliope, go figure! :-D.
P.S. The bathroom scene is my favorite Calzona scene, so I simply had to write a homage to it, I hope you liked it :-).