A/N- What's up everyone? As promised, chapter 14 is here. I hope you enjoy.
When I managed to compose myself after our sentimental moment, I removed my face from where it was hiding in Stef's neck and instantly lifted my sleeve to wipe the tear tracks away. I also had no doubt that my eyes were puffy and red from all of the crying. I kept sniffling too, and I felt really embarrassed at the snot and tears that were on Stef's shirt.
"I'm sorry for ruining your shirt," I said.
"Oh my baby, what did I say about that?"
"That I don't have to apologize for my feelings unless it's harmful to me or to others," I mumbled. "Can I have a tissue?"
"Sure honey," said Lena, then got up to grab the tissue box on their nightstand and the trash can from their bathroom. She returned with the items in hand, and set the trash can by my feet while holding out the tissue box.
I murmured a thanks and wiped my face before blowing my nose into the tissue. I threw it into the can as soon as I finished, and took another one only to do the same thing. I hated it when my nose got all stuffed up or leaky, so I used up quite a few tissues doing so. They both just sat there silently, and I felt a bit uneasy, especially when I was done. Stef was the first to speak.
"Is that better sweets?" she asked kindly.
"Yes," I said, but much to my dismay, my stomach let out a very large growl, signaling that I was hungry.
"Oh my!" exclaimed Lena. At first I thought it was because of my stomach, which made me feel even more embarrassed, but the sentence that followed made me feel relieved. "It's almost 2 o'clock and we haven't had lunch!"
"Lena, my love, it's alright. No one is going to blame you for not making anything earlier," said Stef, trying to soothe Lena's emotions (Guilt? Anger? Both? I honestly don't have a clue).
"I know, but everyone is probably starving, Stef, and I know we don't have enough to make everyone the sandwiches they want because I was going to go grocery shopping after school today!" responded Lena, seeming very agitated if the way she was now pacing was any indication.
"Why don't you just make something else? Or we could order something?" suggested Stef.
"We just ordered pizza over the weekend, and I am not going to start wasting money to order food just because we forgot to make lunch!"
"Alright, love, alright, then what do you suggest, hmm?" asked Stef.
"Grilled cheese?" I supplied. "It's pretty easy and pretty fast to make. It's not super healthy, I know, but you could make a salad for the side, and add tomatoes to the side as well for those who want to add it to their sandwich."
Lena seemed to be thinking it over. "Good idea Ems," she responded, much calmer now that she had a plan.
"Thank you sweets," Stef whispered in my ear.
"Welcome," I whispered back.
"Ok, grilled cheese sandwiches with salad it is," said Lena.
Suddenly, we heard a shout from downstairs. "MOM!"
Stef was the first out the door and down the stairs, me hot on her heels and Lena on mine. I was especially in a hurry because I could recognize my brother's voice anyday. We entered the living room where everyone looked just as confused at Neal's shout from where they were spread out playing UNO. Before I could blink, Neal had rushed over and jumped into Stef's arms. My breath caught in my throat at that, but somehow, she saw it coming and caught him, her arms wrapping around him almost instinctively.
"Neal, baby, what's wrong? Are you hurt? Did something happen?" she asked, confused as to why he shouted for her and why he was clinging to her like a baby would to its mother.
He buried his head in the crook of her neck, looking much like I did earlier, and mumbled the sentence so softly so only she could hear. She mumbled a few sentences back, and I could tell he was ashamed by the way he tried to retreat further into her. Stef then added something else, and his face brightened considerably.
"We're having grilled cheese?!" he shouted excitedly.
"Yes honey, we are," confirmed Lena.
"Can Emma make mine? She makes the best grilled cheese sandwiches in the whole wide world!" exclaimed Neal, causing me to blush fiercely as I hid behind my curtain of hair once more.
"Is that so?" Stef asked him.
He nodded his head vigorously.
"Well I think Lena's are quite delicious too," said Stef.
"No offense Mama, but Emma's are way better, I just know it!" my brother pronounced.
"Well then, I think we should have a contest, what do you say?" asked Stef, eyes twinkling with mirth at the prospect. The other kids looked very intrigued, and I was just doing my best to pretend I was invisible.
"What kind of contest?" asked Jesus.
"Mama and Emma will each make a plate of grilled cheese, one for every person including themselves, and then we'll vote. Obviously they don't get a say, and whoever's is better is going to make our grilled cheese from now on," she explained.
"I like it," confessed Callie.
"Me too," said Jude.
One by one, all of the kids agreed, which just left me and Lena.
"What do you think my loves? Are you up to the challenge?" asked Stef.
"I'm in," said Lena.
I was shocked, for I didn't think Lena was the type to do this sort of thing. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure she's a lot of fun, but I thought this kind of thing was more up Stef's alley. But now, despite how anxious I was feeling about this, I didn't want to seem scared by backing down.
"Sure," I said meekly, but it seemed very loud in the silence that was awaiting my response.
Jesus and Stef whooped, and everybody laughed.
"Ladies and gentlemen," said Stef, acting in an announcer's voice, like the ones that are introducing the players in sports games. "We've got ourselves a cooking competition!"
Everyone laughed at Stef's silliness, and then we were making our way to the kitchen. By this time, Neal had left Stef's arms and was making his way towards me. When he reached me, he beamed up at me, full of confidence that I was going to win.
"Emma, you're gonna win, I just know it!"
"Thanks kid, but I'm not so sure. Lena's been doing this for years, and I haven't made grilled cheese in a long time," I said, trying to get him to see that he shouldn't have so much confidence in me. It didn't seem to matter to him.
"Even if you do lose, I'm still gonna think yours are the best in the world! But I know you're gonna win, and then everyone else will know it and love them too! I'm still gonna love them the most though," he said.
"Thanks bud," I said, chuckling at the last sentence while messing up his hair.
He stuck his tongue out at me, and I did the same to him before going to sit down at one of the stools. I figured Lena was going to make hers first so we wouldn't get them mixed up, and I assumed correctly. She grabbed two loaves of bread from the freezer plus the loaf that was half full from already being out. She then grabbed 18 slices of cheese, and split them into two piles, one for me to use and one for her. She then grabbed the tomatoes and asked someone to cut them up and place them on a plate so that anyone who wanted any could add them to their sandwich. Jude got up to do so, and she thanked him before going back to work. Lena went back to the fridge and grabbed the butter and a knife to spread it. Everyone else was chatting away, but I was watching her cook, seeing what was different from the way I did it. She grabbed the little indoor griller and plugged it into the electrical socket, and set to making and placing the first sandwich on the grill. I smirked when I realized I was easily going to win. Lena was going with the traditional grilled cheese, while I was going to make Cajun grilled cheese. If they had any cajun seasoning, I mused. I would also have to make sure that no one saw what I was adding, for it was a secret ingredient. I assumed everyone would be ok with a little extra spice, but I would have to see if anyone had any food allergies. Jude had just finished cutting up the tomatoes, and placed them and mayonnaise on the table.
"Would one of you guys make the salad please?" Lena asked from where she was cooking.
"I'll do it Mama," Callie volunteered.
"Thanks slug-a-bug," she said.
That's a nickname I haven't heard before. I shook myself out of those thoughts, and decided since I wasn't watching Lena anymore, I should ask Stef about if anyone had any food allergies.
"Hey Stef?"
"Yes Ems?"
"Is anyone allergic to anything? Just so I know in case I decide to cook again," I added the last part as an afterthought, not wanting to spoil the surprise.
"No sweets, everything is at your disposal," she said, before returning to her conversation with my brother and Jesus. Mari and Jude were talking, Brandon chiming in every once in a while.
As I observed this, it made my insecurities about being wanted and being loved creep up on me, causing me to have what I knew were very irrational, negative and untrue thoughts, but at the moment, it didn't seem like it. It was making me wonder where I fit in, why they asked to adopt me. It seemed everyone was perfectly content without me. Heck, even Callie and Lena were conversing while Lena was cooking and Callie was making the salad, not noticing my presence. I mean, sure, Stef and Lena have been comforting me and keeping me safe and doing everything a good parent should do, but I didn't see why. I'm just a dirty foster kid who is never gonna be wanted anywhere. I cause trouble everywhere I go, and even if I don't, foster homes always find a reason to kick me out. Whether it be because they claimed that I don't follow their rules or because I got so injured that I was forcefully removed or because they claim I'm too tomboyish or because they claimed that I was damaged goods. Maybe the Adams Fosters were adopting me because they wanted a younger kid, but they knew I would never leave Neal, and he would never leave me. The thought of running away entered the realm of possibilities as to what I could do, but I knew my brother would be devastated if I were to leave. He would also probably be angry and would never want to forgive me. However, I think he would eventually understand that I did it to protect him, I rationalized. Ever since I met him, that was my job, to make sure he stayed as innocent and a kid for as long as possible. I failed him when I got kicked out of the Catholic home and they sent him back, so I didn't understand why he needed me, why he still loved me. Now he has two moms and five older siblings to love him and to take care of him, so why would he miss me? He doesn't deserve someone like me in his life, someone who runs away when things are too hard, someone who gets in trouble everywhere she goes. This caused me to decide I would be leaving tonight.
I would make sure to leave the phone behind so Stef couldn't track me. I would also take some money to add to the money I have saved up so I could hop a bus and change my appearance and name so nobody would recognize me. I would get a job and my own place to live. I would leave a letter thanking them for their hospitality, and for them to continue the adoption for Neal because he deserves it. I smiled at the thought of this being my baby brother's forever home, and it made me even more sure that leaving would be the best thing for him. Although it saddened me to great lengths, I knew this, this family, is what he needed. Not an older sister who isn't even biologically related to him raising him while they kept moving from house to house, and maybe even on the streets. I was snapped out of my trance by everyone looking at me worriedly and calling my name.
"Emma?" asked Neal.
My heart clenched painfully when I realized this would probably be one of the last times I would see and talk to him. I tried not to let it show when I answered, "What's up little man?" It would appear as though I was successful, for everybody seemed none the wiser.
"We've been calling you for five minutes now," he said.
"Sorry kiddo, I was apparently lost in space," I said jokingly.
"What were you thinking so hard about, love?" asked Stef, her brows furrowed, worry lines etched onto her face.
"About what it would feel like to be here all the time," I easily lied.
They all seemed relieved at that, except Stef. She didn't seem to believe me, but she didn't say anything. She was, however, studying me, trying to figure out what was really going on in my mind. I would have to be extra cautious tonight to make sure I acted normally so as not to tip her off that something was indeed amiss.
"I'm glad it was nothing more serious. Anyways, it's your turn to make your famous grilled cheese sandwiches, according to Neal," said Stef, although to me, it didn't sound all that true. Nobody else seemed to notice though.
I tried really hard not to feel guilty at those words, but I did. I decided to ignore it by responding to Stef. "Alright," I said, then hopped off the stool and made my way over to where Lena was cooking previously.
I took a quick glance to notice Lena had put her plate on the table already, along with the slices of tomato and the salad, which gave me more room to work. I took 18 slices of bread out and spread them out. I made sure nobody was watching, then reached for where I knew they kept the spices from previous observations, and hoped and prayed they had Cajun seasoning. Sure enough, they did, and I quickly sprinkled some onto each slice of bread before placing the spice back just as quickly. I then placed the nine pieces of cheese on nine of the slices of bread, then placed the other pieces of bread on top of those, almost completing the sandwiches. I made sure when I grilled them that they were grilled to perfection, the crusts golden brown, both sides crispy, and the cheese melted. I also made sure to flip them so they weren't burnt and that they were evenly cooked (obviously). One by one, the sandwiches made their way to the plate until they were all on said plate. I unplugged the griller before bringing my sandwiches to the table.
"Voila! My famous grilled cheese sandwiches," I said proudly.
"Yummy!" exclaimed Neal.
Someone must've set the table when I was coming up with my plan for running away, for everyone had plates and forks at where they were seated.
"These smell like absolute deliciousness," moaned Jesus.
We all chuckled at him and his insatiable hunger for food.
"Ok, so whose are we trying first?" asked Mariana.
"Mama's," said Stef.
Stef grabbed the plate with Lena's sandwiches and placed one on her plate before passing it around so everyone could grab one. Lena was the one who grabbed the salad bowl and made sure everyone put some on their plates.
"Ok, we take one bite of Mama's, then we try Emma's and vote, got it?" asked Stef.
"Got it," confirmed Jude, everybody nodding in agreement.
We all took a bite of Lena's, everyone chewing slowly and thoughtfully. I thought they were pretty good, but I was confident I was going to win. Once everybody finished their bite, they complimented Lena.
"Emma's now!" exclaimed Neal, reaching across the table to grab one and taking a ginormous bite.
"Neal!" I scolded while trying not to laugh, but I was very unsuccessful if everyone else was snickering too.
"Wha? Ith's dewicious!" he said while his mouth was stuffed with the bite of sandwich he had just taken.
We were full on belly-laughing now.
"I think you might be a bit biased, kiddo," I said, wheezing from laughter. My laughter started to die down when I remembered I would never have this again, but I didn't let it show.
"Ok, let's see what's so good about Emma's," said Jesus.
He grabbed one and took a bite, immediately moaning. He started talking as soon as he finished chewing. "Oh my God! I'm so voting for Emma!" he proclaimed before practically swallowing the sandwich whole.
"Jesus, slow down or you're gonna choke!" chastised Mariana.
"But ith tho good!" he exclaimed, sounding much like Neal did a few moments ago because his mouth was full of grilled cheese.
Callie, Mariana, Jude, Brandon, Stef, and Lena all decided to grab a sandwich and see what all the fuss was about. I waited patiently for them to grab theirs before I grabbed mine. I decided to finish Lena's first before moving onto mine. As I was polishing off the last of Lena's sandwich, everyone else was taking a bite of mine. They all groaned simultaneously at the taste.
"Emma, you win," said Lena after she finished her first bite, instantly taking another.
"You don't get to vote Mama," admonished Mariana, before turning to me. "But I agree, Emma wins."
"Me too," said Brandon and Callie.
"This is heaven in my mouth," groaned Stef. "No offense sweetheart," she added, looking to Lena.
"None taken, and I mean it," responded Lena.
"This is really good, Emma," said Jude.
"Thanks," I said quietly, blushing profusely at their praise.
I took a bite of my own grilled cheese, and even I had to hide the groan that threatened to come out. It didn't seem fair to make such noises at my own food, but the explosion of flavor my tastebuds experienced made it one of the best sandwiches I've ever made, and was most definitely worthy of the moan I was holding in.
"Ems, what did you put in this to make it so flavorful?" asked Lena.
"It's a secret," I said smugly, glad that everyone was enjoying my grilled cheese. I made a mental note to tell Lena what it is in the letter I was going to write to them.
"Well whatever seasoning it is, it makes this sandwich delicious," she said.
Everybody voiced their agreement.
"Emma, what else are you hiding? I mean, you play piano, you sing, you found your brother we didn't know you had, and you make the best grilled cheese sandwich I've ever tasted," jested Brandon.
I let out a nervous chuckle, his words making me think about my plan to run away. "Nothing that I can think of," I responded.
"Hey Emma?" asked Jude.
Nobody else was paying attention, for they were caught up in their own conversations, so I was all ears. "Yeah Jude?"
"Would you maybe want to paint your nails with me, Callie, and Mari when we're done eating?" he asked, seeming afraid of asking and what the answer would be.
"Sure kid," I said, even though I haven't painted my nails in what seems like forever with the way this system works. I also knew this would be one of the last times I would hangout with them, so I decided to make every moment count.
"Awesome!" he said, then turned to Callie to let her know.
My focus was pulled away from them when my brother called my name.
"Em?"
"What's up kiddo?"
"Are you really happy here?" he asked, his big oceanic eyes looking straight into my emerald ones.
I swallowed heavily before answering. "Why are you asking?"
He shrugged his shoulders and broke our staring contest. "I don't know," he mumbled.
"Yes you do know, Neal, otherwise you wouldn't have asked," I said patiently.
His eyes met mine again. "Because before we were separated, everytime something good happened, you would push our foster parents' buttons to see how much they could take before they sent us back," he explained rapidly, afraid of hurting my feelings with his accusations.
I could feel the curious gazes from everyone on us, but I pretended not to notice to continue discussing with my brother. "Neal, that's not true."
"But it is!" said Neal, now teeming with anger. "Remember the Stantons? The Fergusons? The Coopers? Every single one of them wanted us, both of us, but you kept pushing and pushing them away because you didn't believe them, and they were so fed up with it they sent us back! Maybe they didn't want to adopt us, but they still wanted us to be there!" he yelled, his face flushed red from anger and his breathing heavy.
My brain was short-circuiting. I couldn't come up with a coherent sentence. "Neal," I stammered.
"NO!" he shouted. "I don't want your apologies! I want you to promise that you won't ruin this for me! I love it here and I want to stay!"
"Neal," said Lena, the warning not to do or say anything he would regret was clear in her tone.
He wasn't listening to her, so I tried to diffuse the situation. "Neal, come on kiddo. I love you, and—"
"Don't call me kiddo! My name is Neal! YOU RUINED EVERY GOOD THING I'VE EVER HAD AND I HATE YOU!" he screamed, before sprinting upstairs and slamming the door to his bedroom, the noise echoing throughout the otherwise quiet and still house.
I was stuck in my seat, stunned to silence. I had no idea Neal had so much anger towards me and my ability to push people away. I was especially stunned at the fact that he said he hates me. Throughout every argument we've had, never once have we uttered those words to each other. This officially solidified my plan of running away. If my own brother didn't want or love me, who else in this world possibly could?
Stef & Lena's bedroom seconds before Neal called for Stef
"Ok, grilled cheese sandwiches with salad it is," said Lena.
Suddenly, there was a shout from downstairs. "MOM!"
Stef was the first one out the door and down the stairs, Emma hot on her heels and Lena on Emma's. Stef was in a rush because her son yelling for her filled her with a sense of dread, and the same went for Lena even though he had called for Stef. When they reached the living room, everyone looked just as confused at Neal's shout from where they were spread out playing UNO. She noticed Neal dashing towards her and she instinctively knew he was going to jump into her arms, so she prepared herself for the added weight. Sure enough, that was what he did, and her arms wrapped around him protectively.
"Neal, baby, what's wrong? Are you hurt? Did something happen?" she asked, confused as to why he shouted for her and why he was clinging to her like a baby would to its mother.
Her son buried his head in the crook of her neck, much like Emma had earlier, and mumbled a sentence that even she had to strain herself to hear.
"You said you would be down in a few minutes but it's been twenty," he mumbled.
Stef let out a quiet breath of relief before mumbling back. "I'm afraid your sister needed me, love. If you wanted me, you could have just come back upstairs instead of almost giving me a heart attack thinking you got seriously injured by shouting like that."
She felt him try to retreat further into her, and her heart swelled with love for this precious boy. "It's no reason to be ashamed, sweets. Now, what do you think of having grilled cheese for lunch? Hmm?"
"We're having grilled cheese?!" he shouted, becoming much more like the exuberant child she knew he was.
"Yes honey, we are," his Mama confirmed.
"Can Emma make mine? She makes the best grilled cheese sandwiches in the whole wide world!" he exclaimed, and everyone noticed how Emma's blush became prominent as she tried to hide behind her beautiful golden curls.
"Is that so?" asked Stef.
Neal nodded his head vigorously.
"Well I think Lena's are quite delicious too," she said, trying to defend her wife without making it sound too defensive.
"No offense Mama, but Emma's are way better, I just know it!" he announced confidently.
"Well then, I think we should have a contest, what do you say?" Stef asked her family, knowing that her eyes were just twinkling with mirth. She noticed her kids looked intrigued, but Emma was still trying to hide behind her curly locks.
"What kind of contest?" asked Jesus.
"Mama and Emma will each make a plate of grilled cheese, one for every person including themselves, and then we'll vote. Obviously they don't get a say, and whoever's is better is going to make our grilled cheese from now on," she explained, feeling very proud of her idea.
"I like it," confessed Callie.
"Me too," said Jude.
One by one, all of the kids agreed, which just left Lena and Emma.
"What do you think my loves? Are you up to the challenge?" asked Stef, knowing her wife couldn't refuse a challenge.
"I'm in," she responded.
Now, everyone was waiting with bated breath for Emma to decide if she was going to take the challenge. During this time, Stef deemed it ok to put Neal down, and he didn't protest, which she took as a good sign.
"Sure," said Emma after a few tense moments of silence.
Stef and Jesus whooped, and everyone laughed at their antics.
"Ladies and gentlemen," said Stef, purposely talking in a sports announcer's voice to hear the wonderful laughter of her family. "We've got ourselves a cooking competition!"
Her plan worked, for everyone was laughing at her, and she smiled as they made their way to the kitchen. Lena made it first, then Stef, Emma, Neal, Brandon, Jesus, Mariana, Callie, and last but not least, Jude.
Stef managed to catch the last part of Emma and Neal's conversation, and grinned at the confidence Neal had in Emma. "...will know it and love them too! I'm still gonna love them the most though," said Neal excitedly.
"Thanks bud," Emma replied, chuckling at her brother's silliness while messing up his hair.
Stef then proceeded to sit at the table, everyone else following suit, save for her wife, who was going to make her grilled cheese sandwiches first. Her kids started chatting to each other, and realized this was one of the only times she would simply get to stare at Lena without any interruptions. She observed as Lena moved about the kitchen with an ease and grace she would never possess. Her astoundingly beautiful, wonderful, kind, loving, hard-working, patient, absolutely amazing Lena, and pondered how she got so lucky as to meet such an incredible woman. Stef then got pulled into a conversation with Jesus and Neal about what was cooler, skateboarding or rollerblading. She couldn't help but to laugh quietly to herself about how passionate and adamant they were that theirs was better. While they were distracted, she took a surreptitious glance around the table, noting that everybody but Emma was talking. Her daughter seemed to be deep in thought about something while eyeing Lena like a hawk as she cooked, and Stef realized she was probably just watching the competition. Before she returned to the conversation with two of her sons, she noticed Emma smirked at something. However, she was pulled back into their discussion, and she quickly forgot about Emma smirking as she focused on what her sons were saying.
"Would one of you guys make the salad please?" Lena asked from where she was cooking.
"I'll do it Mama," Callie volunteered.
"Thanks slug-a-bug," she said.
Stef was going to offer, but her eldest daughter did so before she could, so she shrugged her shoulders and was about to return to talking to her boys before Emma's voice caught her attention. "Hey Stef?"
"Yes Ems?"
"Is anyone allergic to anything? Just so I know in case I decide to cook again," she asked.
She quickly responded to her daughter so she could join Neal and Jesus so they wouldn't start yelling at each other. "No sweets, everything is at your disposal."
As Stef was busy in her conversation, Callie and Lena were busy in theirs.
"So Cal, how's school going?"
"It's pretty good. Not too much homework yet, which I'm grateful for. Other than that, nothing that interesting," she said, feeling a bit suspicious about her Mama's intentions. Callie knew that her Mama could easily check up on her grades, so naturally, she was curious as to why she would ask something like that.
"Good, that's good," said Lena while working up the nerve to ask Callie about what she thinks of Emma and Neal becoming a part of their family.
Callie, however, was much more observant than her Moms gave her credit for, so she could see that something was making her Mama nervous. "Mama, what do you really want to ask me? I know you can check on my grades in school, and you always know when we have homework, so what's really going on?"
Lena let out a deep breath. "Are you really ok with Emma and Neal being adopted? I know it's a big adjustment, having two more siblings, one of which you and Mari are going to have to share a room with. And having two more people to share a bathroom with, having even less privacy..." she trailed off.
Callie took a moment to gather her thoughts before responding. "I wouldn't have said yes if I was unsure about it, Mama. Besides, I really like Emma. We're a lot alike, and I think I can really help her adjust. I'm not saying I don't like Neal, but I haven't gotten much of a chance to hangout with him since he sticks to either you and Mom, Emma, or Jesus and Jude. But from what I've seen, he's a lot like Jude. Sweet, innocent, kind, helpful. I know it's a lot of change, and pretty fast too, but I want them here, Mama. They need love and stability, and I know we can offer them exactly that."
Lena's heart melted into a pile of mush and goo at Callie's words. "Oh sweetheart, you have no idea how much better that makes me feel. I know we didn't discuss it with you all beforehand, but Emma was feeling so scared about being taken away and insecure about how much we wanted her and—"
"Mama," interrupted Callie. "I promise you, we all want Emma and Neal here, you don't have to explain why to me."
"You're right, you're right," said Lena after taking a deep breath to calm herself down before she got worked up.
"I'm done with the salad. Do you want me to put it on the table?" asked Callie.
"Yes please," said Lena, nodding towards the table.
Callie did just that as Lena finished making the last sandwich. She placed it on the plate and brought it over to the table.
"Emma, I'm done," said Lena.
Emma didn't answer, for she was lost in thought about her plan to run away.
"Emma, it's time for you to make your sandwiches," Lena tried again. When there was still no response, she looked to Stef for help.
"Stef, she's not answering."
"Emma, love. Come on, we're waiting for you to make your sandwiches."
There was still no response. By this point, it had been about two minutes, and all of the other kids were now paying attention to what was happening.
"Emma, sweets, come on, this isn't funny," said Stef.
"Come on Emma, I'm hungry!" Jesus said jokingly, trying to get some sort of reaction from his foster-soon-to-be-adopted-sister.
"Em, come on, I want your grilled cheese already!" whined Neal.
"Emma, we're having a concert and we want you to play and sing with us!" said Mariana, desperate to get some response from her foster sister.
Three more minutes, and nothing. Stef was about ready to book it out of the house and take her to the hospital before Emma finally came back to the present and responded to Neal.
"Emma?" he asked.
"What's up little man?" she asked.
"We've been calling you for five minutes now," said Neal.
"Sorry kiddo, I was apparently lost in space," said Emma jokingly.
"What were you thinking so hard about, love?" asked Stef, feeling her brows furrow and feeling the worry lines make an appearance.
"About what it would feel like to be here all the time," said Emma.
Stef saw how the rest of her family reacted to those words. They believed Emma, but she didn't. Stef had a feeling that it was something else and something deeper than just living with them all the time. She didn't know if it was a cop's intuition, a mother's intuition, or a combination of both, but she just knew something was up. She studied Emma for a bit, trying to figure out what she was trying to hide from them. After a few seconds of this, Stef responded to Emma so as not to tip the others off about her thoughts on something being amiss with their soon-to-be-official-sister/daughter. "Well, I'm glad it was nothing more serious. Anyways, it's your turn to make your famous grilled cheese sandwiches, according to Neal," she said, knowing that only Emma would be able to tell that her words weren't all that true.
Emma seemed to process this for a quick second before speaking. "Alright," she replied, then hopped off the bar stool to go make her sandwiches.
Stef watched as Emma glanced at the table for a moment before grabbing the bread and cheese she needed for hers. Stef decided to think about it more later, and made a mental note to see if Emma and Neal were biologically related at work the next day. She was about to get caught up on what the rest of her kids were up to when she felt Lena's hand grasp hers and give an almost imperceptible squeeze. Stef looked to her wife to see her smiling at her, and she had no choice but to smile back, not wanting to worry Lena about the thoughts in her head. She gave her a squeeze back, and her hand was released as they got caught up in two different conversations. Lena, however, knew her wife, and she could tell something was on her mind, and it has been ever since Emma was lost to the rest of the world. She watched Stef as she replied to their daughter, and she just knew from the look on her face that something Emma said had caused her concern. That was why she grabbed her hand, for she knew Stef would need the distraction. Lena put on a smile, hoping she would get one back, and she did. She felt Stef squeeze back before they got caught up in their separate conversations. After a while, Emma appeared with her delicious smelling sandwiches in hand.
"Voila! My famous grilled cheese sandwiches," she said proudly.
"Yummy!" exclaimed Neal.
"These smell like absolute deliciousness," moaned Jesus.
Everyone chuckled at Jesus and his insatiable hunger for food.
"Ok, so whose are we trying first?" asked Mariana.
"Mama's," said Stef.
She grabbed the plate that was holding Lena's grilled cheese and placed one on hers before passing it around so everybody could grab one. Lena grabbed the salad bowl and made sure all of the kids, including Stef, put some on their plates.
"Ok, so we take one bite of Mama's, then we try Emma's and vote, got it?" asked Stef.
"Got it," confirmed Jude, everyone nodding in agreement.
Jesus was the first to take a bite, the others following close behind. They all complimented Lena after they had finished chewing.
"Emma's now!" exclaimed Neal, reaching across the table to grab one and taking a ginormous bite.
"Neal!" scolded Emma while trying not to laugh, but she was failing and everyone else didn't even bother to try and hide their snickering.
"Wha? Ith's dewicious!" he said while his mouth was stuffed with the huge bite he had just taken.
Now, everyone was full on belly-laughing.
"I think you might be a bit biased kiddo," said Emma, wheezing with laughter.
Stef was the only one to notice Emma somber for a little while, and she hoped Emma didn't notice. It appeared as though she hadn't, and Stef made another note to spend some extra time with her.
"Ok, let's see what's so good about Emma's," said Jesus, unknowingly interrupting his Mom's train of thought.
Jesus grabbed one and took a bite, immediately letting out a moan. He started talking as soon as he finished chewing and swallowing. "Oh my God! I'm so voting for Emma!" he proclaimed before practically shoving the whole sandwich down his throat.
"Jesus, slow down or you're gonna choke!" chastised Mariana.
"But ith tho good!" he exclaimed, sounding much like Neal had a few moments ago because his mouth was full of grilled cheese.
Callie, Mariana, Jude, Brandon, Stef, and Lena all grabbed a sandwich to see what all the fuss was about. Emma waited patiently for them to grab one before she grabbed one of her own. She decided to finish Lena's first before trying her own. As she was polishing off the rest of Lena's grilled cheese, everybody else was taking a bite of Emma's. Everyone groaned simultaneously at the taste.
"Emma, you win," said Lena after she finished her first bite, instantly taking another.
"You don't get to vote Mama," admonished Mariana before turning to Emma. "But I agree, Emma wins."
"Me too," said Brandon and Callie.
"This is heaven in my mouth," groaned Stef. "No offense sweetheart," she added, looking to her wife to gauge her reaction.
"None taken, and I mean it," responded Lena.
"This is really good Emma," said Jude.
"Thanks," she said rather quietly, blushing quite a bit at their praise.
Stef and Lena watched discreetly as Emma took a bite of her own sandwich, her reaction instant. Her eyes closed and she looked as though she was hiding her own moan. They felt very amused at the thought of Emma moaning at her own creation. Lena, being the "official cook" of the family, decided to ask Emma a question. "Ems, what did you put in this to make it so flavorful?"
"It's a secret," she said smugly, seeming glad that everyone was enjoying her cooking.
"Well whatever seasoning it is, it makes this sandwich delicious," said Lena.
Everyone voiced their agreement.
"Emma, what else are you hiding? I mean, you play piano, you sing, you found your brother we didn't know you had, and you make the best grilled cheese sandwich I've ever tasted," jested Brandon.
Stef noticed Emma let out a nervous chuckle before replying to Brandon's question. "Nothing I can think of," she responded.
"Hey Emma?" asked Jude.
"Yeah Jude?" replied Emma.
"Would you maybe want to paint your nails with me, Callie, and Mari when we're done eating?" he asked, feeling very nervous that she would downright refuse.
"Sure kid," she said.
"Awesome!" he said, then turned to Callie to let her know that Emma had agreed.
Neal made sure no one else was paying attention, then called Emma's name. "Em?"
"Are you really happy here?" he asked, locking his oceanic eyes onto his sister's emerald ones.
Emma swallowed heavily before answering his question. "Why are you asking?"
Neal knew she was deflecting, but he didn't care for it. He shrugged his shoulders and broke their staring contest. "I don't know," he decided to mumble.
"Yes you do know, Neal, otherwise you wouldn't have asked," Emma pointed out patiently.
His eyes met Emma's again. "Because before we were separated, everytime something good happened, you would push our foster parents' buttons to see how much they could take before they sent us back," explained Neal rapidly, afraid of hurting his sister's feelings with his accusations.
It didn't go unnoticed by him or Emma that everyone was curiously gazing at them since he raised his voice a little responding to Emma.
"Neal, that's not true," she said calmly.
"But it is!" he said, well and truly teeming with anger now. "Remember the Stantons? The Fergusons? The Coopers? Every single one of them wanted us, but you kept pushing and pushing them away because you didn't believe them, and they were so fed up with it they sent us back! Maybe they didn't want to adopt us, but they still wanted us to be there!" yelled Neal, knowing his face was bright red from his anger and knowing he was breathing heavily from shouting.
Emma seemed speechless. "Neal," she stammered.
Neal didn't mean to blow up at her like this, but he was so so so angry that she had this ability to push people away from her because she thought the world was only filled with people who wanted to hurt her. "NO!" he shouted. "I don't want your apologies! I want you to promise that you won't ruin this for me! I love it here and I want to stay!"
"Neal," said Lena, and he heard the warning in her voice, telling him not to take it any further so he wouldn't say or do anything he would regret, but he was so tired of holding in how he was feeling because nobody listened to him. What Emma tried to do next was the last straw.
"Neal, come on kiddo. I love you, and—"
"Don't call me kiddo! My name is Neal! YOU RUINED EVERY GOOD THING I'VE EVER HAD AND I HATE YOU!" he screamed, wanting to hurt his sister like she's hurt him in the past. He then sprinted upstairs and slammed the door shut to his bedroom, the noise echoing throughout the otherwise quiet and still house.
The kids were in shock, for the only other time they heard Neal sound so mad and hurt was when Emma ran away. Stef wasn't sure whether to go chase after her son and make him apologize or if she should try and comfort her daughter and let him stew in his anger. Stef could guess by the look on Emma's face that she's never seen Neal act anything but loving towards her. She had to wonder if this was going to be the last straw for Emma as well and if she would attempt to run again. Stef resolved herself to keep an extra close eye on Emma today. Lena was having the same thoughts as her wife. She was worried about both of her children, for she has never seen either of them act like this toward each other. She hoped and prayed that Emma wouldn't try to run, and she knew Stef was already thinking of ways to keep an eye on Emma without Emma knowing that she was keeping an eye on her. Everyone was hoping that this wouldn't cause Emma to retreat back into her fortress of sturdy walls packed with defense mechanisms. But based on how angry Neal was, they weren't too sure what was gonna happen next with the both of them.
A/N- What do you think? I know I had no clue that any of this was going to happen, that's for sure. The chapter wrote itself.