DECEMBER 17 FRIDAY

On the train back home.

"Do you have any twos?" Sirius asked.

"Go fish yourself," James replied.

They had been on the train for an hour. It somehow felt like they had forgotten something.

Since it wasn't his turn, Remus put down his cards, and stroked the Breadscalibur in his lap.

"Today is the 16th right?"

"It's the 17th," James replied.

"Oh. Then the Gingerbread Witch won't turn up until tomorrow."

"Actually I think she's supposed to do it today," said Sirius.

"Hm."

Then Remus said, he couldn't play more, because he needed to practice conjuring bubblegum monsters, to counter the Gingerbread Witch's dough monsters.

"If you were smart, you'd practice conjuring an oven monster," said Sirius.

This gave Remus an even better idea.

"Yeah I do have my flexible volcano spell don't I!"
"Damn it."

But he decided to practice conjuring gelatinous bubblegum monsters anyway.

"I wouldn't mind some bread," said James. "Good thing we brought a bread knife."

"I was going to stab the Gingerbread Witch with it but I'll let you get your bread first," said Sirius.

A flurry of snow inside the compartment, despite the window being shut. Except... it wasn't snow.

It was... flour.

"She's coming!" said James and put down his cards. "Everyone get changed!"
They spun into their Mismen outfits and made sure their butt masks were on right and that the acid marigolds on their waistcoats were working.

Peter was still trying to zip up his formal shorts when the Gingerbread Witch arrived.

Because they didn't often get the chance to show off their Arse Marks, because they often forgot to moon their enemies, they had painted the green butt with the tapeworm wiggling out in the form of an M on their masks.

Gadgets in hand. They waited.

The flurry of flour became Grethel Hansen. She was a fairy tale kind of hideous.

"The hell are you?"

Sirius put down his rubber chicken. He grabbed the Breadscalibur, raised it high.

"You're duck food!"

He sliced the sword through her neck. But nothing happened. He stabbed her in her heart. Nothing happened.

"Only Mordag the Cutter can defeat her!" said Remus.

"Oh yeah guess I forgot."

He threw the sword on the luggage rack.

Grethel Hansen raised her arms and made sorcerer-style wormy fingers.

"Rise! RIIISE!"
Dough monsters arose from the floor, two of them but they were large and they were ready to protect Grethel Hansen from anything.

Sirius raised his rubber chicken.

"Misman Eggnog, awesomeness un-feathered!"
He flung the rubber chicken at a dough monster but it just got stuck there. James remembered seeing his dear Ziggy Stardust being snapped it half. He opened both palms.

"Misman Shocko-Hoop! You're toast!"
He could smell the bread cooking and see golden crusts form on the dough monsters in small patches.

But the train made such a sharp turn the sword fell off the rack, and on his arms. Grethel Hansen grabbed it.

Peter was hiding under the seats. Remus opened his snake-nut can but what happened between the dough monsters and the bubblegum anaconda just looked weirdly perverted.

One dough monster kneaded the bubblegum anaconda into itself and became a peppermint dough. The two massive dough monsters kept rising, filling up the entire compartment, and began to swallow the mismen.

"Ha ha ha!" the Gingerbread Witch laughed. "Get them my pretties!"

Something kicked open the compartment door. It was a giant green gummy bear. It roared, grabbed the Gingerbread Witch and broker her neck.

She fell down dead.

The dough monsters began to weaken and lose their grip.

Behind the semi-transluscent gummy bear, a silhuette. A silhuette that the Mismen had seen many times.

"The Cape?" said Sirius. "Is that you?"

The Cape came running into the compartment, squeezing past his giant gummy bear, and struck a pose.

"Ha ha ha! I bet you thought you had seen the last of me, MisMen!"

"Did you just save us?" James asked.

"No! No I did not save you! In your sad little dreams! Why would I do that? No I came for this, didn't I?"

He picked up the Breadscalibur.

"Ha ha haaaa!"
He felt the Breadscalibur.

"The Gingerbread Witch is dead so I guess it is up to me to cut the horns off Goaty Man! Try and stop me!"

He ran out with the sword. The chaps were still trying to get out of some very sticky dough. They could see The Cape behind the giant gummy bear stop and back away.

"Oh god! What is that smell? Oh... oh no!"

The silhouette of two venus fly traps lashing out at The Cape, as well as a bunch of ribbons being thrown a him.

"Not the fly paper! Not the fly paper! Damn you, The Poo!"
The Cape dropped the sword and ran off. The Poo's plumpy silhuette came into view.

"I'm not The Poo! I'm The Fly Trap! Yeah you run along!"
The gummy bear vanished and The Poo came into the compartment.

"Mismen! Are you ok?"

"We were already fine but thanks anyway, The Poo," James replied.

"I'm not The Poo! I'm The Fly Trap! The Fly Trap In Da House!"

He cast his mark: a fly buzzing around a poo.

"Nice poo mark, The Poo."

"It's not poo, it's honey! I think I will keep the sword as payment, for saving your lives just now."
"Are you sure you want to do that?" said Remus. "The Tojours Fromage want that. They will kill you to get that."

"What are you saying, do you want to borrow it? All you have to do is ask! Here, take it!"
The Poo dropped the sword and ran out again.

The chaps were reunited with all their gadgets and James found the snapped halves of his Ziggy Stardust. There was also a ton of other crap lying around now.