{-Alfonse-}

He smiled at the scene in front of him, glad that he'd woken up soon enough to see it.

Xander had arrived moments ago, and when she'd seen him, Veronica seemed to completely forget what she'd been doing before and hugged him.

"I missed you…" She was barely audible, yes, but it held its meaning all the same. "There's a lot I need to talk to you about…"

"I missed you too, little princess." Xander had a smile of his own, just as genuine as it would've been to be looking at any of his siblings. He looked up at Alfonse and nodded to him. "Thank you for looking after her for us. It means a lot to know there's someone we can rely on to take care of her when neither of us can."

"I'm just happy to be able to help," Alfonse replied honestly. "Trust is a valuable thing to have in times like this. If we can't even depend on each other, what hope can we have for a peaceful future?" He knew that Xander was only aware of the half of it—only what Veronica knew about the nightmares and the situation with Loki—but that didn't mean the gesture lost its meaning.

"No one here can argue to that, I'm sure." Xander turned his attention back to Veronica again. "Now how about we head home? I think Bruno should be coming back in a few days too, so with any luck we can all get there at the same time."

Veronica nodded. "I'd like that… there's something I'd like both of you to know and I'm not sure if I'll be able to say it two more times…" She glanced at Alfonse. "I didn't think I'd say it at all, if I'm being completely honest."

"Before you leave." Alfonse stepped a bit closer to them, holding out a neatly folded piece of paper. He'd written it the night before and grabbed it when he realized Xander was there for Veronica; with everything Henriette had told him on his mind, he realized that there was actually a way he could ask the questions he wanted to. "Can you give this to Zacharias? I hope it's alright if the letters are personal, and I'd understand if you'd rather—"

"I'll see to it that he gets this," Veronica promised. "You don't have to worry about anything. I'm sure you've got enough to deal with as it is, and I'm not Askran—I'm not going to deny that I can call you an ally, regardless of our current circumstances."

Alfonse wordlessly nodded his thanks, and watched them leave. He sighed and, aware that it was too early to do anything truly productive, went to the library. Even though it had been a few days, he still hadn't read much of the books Henriette had given him; just a few pages with Veronica, since it was written by a member of the Askran royal family (though they couldn't decide on the specifics).

And for a while, no one bothered him. He had more time to think than he would've preferred, given the complicated mess of things that kept him from focusing on reading. Really, he wished he was thinking about the future; how well Veronica and Xander would get back to Embla, the kind of reply he'd receive from Zacharias, what they were supposed to expect from Loki, and how they could even consider defeating her if they were still stuck arguing with each other. But it wasn't like that.

Closing his eyes, if not just to blink, and an image of someone else came to his mind. He thought of Gustav, Líf, Hel, Thórr… the blurry yet so clear smug look of Loki. It wasn't just faces—the picture of Natheniel's versions of them, the cave they'd been in when the siblings first encountered Loki years ago, so many different scenes from the realm of the dead, barely a week ago when he stood in front of Veronica and listened to what she felt about her worth. What he'd felt in each of those times came back to him, only succeeded in making him overwhelmed and frustrated.

"This is pointless," he mumbled, no longer able to focus on the book in front of him. He closed it and shoved it aside with the others.

"What's pointless?" He jumped at the voice that was a bit too close to the problem for his liking. Eir poked her head out from behind some bookshelves—likely having just entered the library a couple minutes ago—and, seeing that it was him, walked over to his table.

If it was obvious that she'd surprised him, she certainly didn't mention it and he tried his best not to let his tone show it. "I thought you were at the Order's castle."

"Sharena invited me yesterday, remember?" The princess to the realm of the dead looked at him curiously, blinking. "She said she told you, though I suppose you have been rather preoccupied lately. But that leads to why I am here, specifically, at the library. About twenty minutes ago, she asked if I could go and get something for her headache; likely the result in her and the queen spending a considerable amount of time yesterday in the gardens with the odd crystal. I forgot to ask where it was, though, as I am not as familiar with this place as I am the Order's. So I went to find you as I did not wish to bother her."

The day after he'd talked with Henriette, Sharena came to their mother and announced what Lekra had suggested; getting used to the feeling of the nightmare's heart in an attempt to dull its effects on them. Both Sharena and Henriette felt at least some form of discomfort around it, so the latter was trying her best to support the former as much as she could. So far the only thing it seemed to be doing for either of them was making them even more uncomfortable—he knew that Henriette was finding it harder to sleep and Sharena was having frequent headaches like Eir was describing. It still didn't keep them from trying, though.

"You know how to get to the kitchen, right?" At her small nod, he continued. "From there, walk to the back like you're going to the pantry. There's two other small rooms, and if it's not in the one on the right check the left. Some of the servants have an annoying tendency to misplace things…"

Even after a couple of minutes, she was still standing there. It wasn't until a couple more minutes of silence did she actually say something. "May I ask you something, relating to what I've observed upon our minimal interactions since defeating Hel?"

"Sure." His thoughts still felt like they were all over the place, but he wasn't about to tell her that. But he began to wonder if it had been a mistake when she took another moment to properly put it into words.

"When you look at me, who do you see?" Her voice was solemn, but the look in her eyes showed she wanted an answer.

"I don't follow." In truth, he did follow. More than he wanted to admit. The fact he didn't even look up at her was more than enough to prove it.

Eir sighed, shaking her head slowly. "Then allow me to phrase it differently. If you were to face your reflection, right now at this very moment, who would be staring back at you? Will it be yourself, or maybe someone who's hurt you? What about someone you have hurt—maybe even a complete stranger? Don't mistake my words, it is wise to hold precautions and doubts and fears. But one must not let that overcome them. The kingdom's stability resides in your stability; if my words mean nothing else to you, then let that be your reason to take what I am saying into consideration."

She didn't wait for him to reply at all. Bowing, she announced, "With that, I should fulfill Sharena's request. I have lingered here long enough." She went to leave, about to disappear behind the bookshelves again when she paused in a thoughtful silence. "What was it that they always called you..? Ah! Long live the prince of peace." Then she was gone.

Alfonse didn't bother asking her about it. He wasn't about to ask her how she knew about him being called prince of peace—if she hadn't heard it from Sharena or Iztali than she would've heard it from Hel, who must've used it before if Líf knew it. And he was aware that everything she'd told him was true.

He could feel it; the distance he was placing between him and everyone else, especially after the nosebleeds started. He didn't quite understand how but he knew that he was falling prey to the part of him that couldn't help but become reminded of the past at even the smallest of similarities. People were worrying over him and he knew that, but that didn't mean he was going to open up about it. That meant hearing their false pity and understanding, their words of comfort in a situation they couldn't begin to comprehend yet acted like they had gone through all of what he had. He'd deal with his own problems by himself.

"Believe me, you're not always going to have them to hide behind. There's no saving you. Just stop while you're ahead, everything will be simpler if you leave them out of this before anyone gets hurt." He didn't think he'd ever be agreeing with what Líf had told him as much as he was beginning to agree with that.

((A/N: Y'all have no idea how long I wanted to state that Xander refers to Veronica as "little princess."

I just love how Eir says this super cryptic thing, then goes "OK, my work here is done" and walks away like she said nothing. I need more Eir in these stories.

This is the final chapter of this story! Check below for a preview of the next story and ways to support me!

Preview: The appearance of an álfar sparks a journey to the dream realm. It's called Following a Dream, and it features the Book IV people and a lot of Sharena. The release date is also not set in stone, but probably around the end of November in 2020.

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