A/N: sidenote: listen to Nothing Left To Say by Imagine Dragons on loop for this chapter, you'll see what I mean, so before you begin to read, search the song on loop on youtube, ITunes or whatever and read the chapter, it'll bring the feels out even more.
#sorrynotsorryforthis
Chapter 15: The Search Of The Truth
I gasped as I sat down on a tree in a small wooded thicket in Colorado, I wasn't in Montrose, but I was safe, and gone. Gods. That had been so close…. Very close…..That couldn't happen again. No again. I-I thought that Tartarus couldn't control me. What had happened? What had gone wrong? The dark lines had swirled and sparked scarlet. My-my conscience was gone. What was wrong with me? The only thing I was thankful for was that at least she had made the rest blind and deaf for that time. It was mandatory that no onlookers are to see or hear what The Dark Virgin does to her victims and to erase whatever memories they had before and replace them with new ones. I realized that I was breathing heavily, I couldn't go back to Camp Half-Blood. I would just pick up my satchel, leave a quick note and flee, like I always have done. But then I realized that my whole body was aching. I began to breathe in and out. The pain lingered around as it faded and then popped back up once more, burning and bringing even deeper pain.
I groaned.
Shit! This hurt.
That couldn't happen again, not again.
What had happened?
That wasn't supposed to happen, or at least not like it did.
I sighed and winced as I stood up and disappeared back to the Camp. I silently and sneakily walked back to the Hera Cabin as I stuffed the chocolate bag and bar and closed my satchel. I grabbed a prism and made an IM message. Once I was done I began to write a note:
Dear Chiron,
I'll go ahead and start watching over them today, don't worry, everything will be okay.
~Love, At ❦❦❦
I duct-taped the note on the door of the Hera Cabin as I went to the Dining Pavilion and smuggled as much food as I could and disappeared. I landed in Delaware.
"Shit!" I screeched.
I leaned against a tree as I felt my body ache once more and my stomach felt queasy. I threw up at the base of a tree as I stumbled towards the banks of a river. I went down to my knees as I glanced at my reflection in the water. I couldn't….. I just couldn't… I wasn't The Dark Virgin….. Right?
I saw as my eye color changed from chocolate-blueberry to a fiery scarlet red…. My pupils began to turn into slits…. Black lines with slivers of fiery scarlet began to creep up my arms to the side of my neck…..My tattoo began to burn at the side of my neck….
I let loose a small scream as I stood up and I clutched my head in pain. No. Not again…
I clutched my head. As I began to gasp for breath, I felt my throat burn as I choked and gasped, sputtered and tried to make it stop.
I wasn't The Dark Virgin, or was I? I had been tortured to become an assassin, a murderer, a psychopath…
On another side I felt The Dark Virgin cackle with glee. Obviously she was pleased. Because she had left her mark and a great one. The Dark Virgin, the TRUE Dark Virgin was back. Back and stronger than ever before.
No.
She wasn't back.
There was no Dark Virgin, she didn't exist. There was no murderer or psychopath or mindless assassin. She was….
She….
No one knew who she was…..
Not even her herself…
And no one cared, it didn't matter.
No.
Because she wasn't a toy.
She-she….
She…
I…..
What was it?
She or I?
She or I?
Her or me?
Her or me?
They or them?
They or them?
Who was she?
Who was she?
What was she?
What was she?
From the bottom of her essence, she had to be something.
Something.
Thing.
A thing was an object.
Some was having a bit.
So was she a bit of a thing?
Was that it?
Was she just a thing?
A thing?!
Things...so needed and so wanted…..
The Boss had called her a thing.
A useless thing.
Use.
Use was functional.
Less, was nothing.
So was she a functional nothing?
Was she something that didn't work?
Something that was trash?
Was that it?
Was that the reason her Boss had been so upset about?
That she didn't work?
But she did!
She did work! Then why had he been so cruel?
Wait...was she...was she cruel too?
No.
No, wait, no…..
She had helped humanity.
She had helped them out, right?
I didn't know what I was.
What was I?
Who was I?
Who.
What.
I was a Descendant of Hatshepsut.
Was.
Was.
No, wait…
I am a Descendant of Hatshepsut.
Am.
Much better….
I was a Vestal Virgin.
Was.
Auuggh!
There was that stupid word again.
Darn it!
But I was.
There was a time where I worshipped and helped Vesta. When I was her faithful Lieutenant. When I had roamed the countryside when I didn't have anything to do. I had been immortal and a Virgin.
I had dressed in maroon clothing and helped Vesta out by hunting monsters and tending the Hearth. But that was around a year ago or so. Until Kronos and Gaia stepped in and we had to disband.
I was also the Host of Nephthys.
Was.
Because I was.
I remembered back when I had hosted the glorious goddess and felt free. When her power and mine combined… We were unstoppable. But that was around nine months ago. Weeks for me…..
I was the Daughter of Pontus.
Was.
No.
Am.
I am the Daughter of Pontus.
Whether I liked it or not.
I am.
Was, signified before.
Am, signified now.
Going, signified later.
I am.
Currently I am the Daughter of Pontus.
And currently I am searching for the truth…...
I reached for my IPod and saw a new song, called Nothing Left To Say by Imagine Dragons for free for two days. I clicked on the enter button and began to listen to the song as I stared out into the dark, cloudless night.
Who knows how long
I've been awake now?
The shadows on my wall don't sleep
They keep calling me
Beckoning…
Who knows what's right?
The lines keep getting thinner
My age has never made me wise
But I keep pushing on and on and on and on
There's nothing left to say now... [2x]
I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now... [2x]
There's nothing left to say now... [2x]
I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now... [2x]
Below my soul
I feel an engine
Collapsing as it sees the pain
If I could only shut it out
I've come too far
To see the end now
Even if my way is wrong
I keep pushing on and on and on and on
There's nothing left to say now... [2x]
I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now...[2x]
There's nothing left to say now... [2x]
I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now... [2x]
I keep falling, I keep falling down...
I keep falling, I keep falling down...
Hey!
I keep falling, I keep falling down...
I keep falling, I keep falling down...
If you could only save me
I'm drowning in the waters of my soul
There's nothing left to say now... [2x]
I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now... [2x]
There's nothing left to say now... [2x]
I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now... [2x]
Gods. I had NEVER related to a song like this one. I pressed another button for it to go on replay as I heard it even more. I heard every lyric and beat and I felt as if it were calling to me. My brain screaming
"Finally! Something I can relate to!"
I relaxed even more.
This song, this song was my song.
I could relate to it at every level. No matter what.
Who knows how long
I've been awake now?
The shadows on my wall don't sleep
They keep calling me
Beckoning...
Every time I fell to sleep, I never could. I always stayed awake and wondered how much time had passed as my dreams. My nightmares. My "shadows" kept calling back to me. Trying to reach for me.
…...
(Andy's flashbacks:
We see Andy waking up at night, screaming, drenched in sweat, sobbing….
We switch to another setting….
Andy in the middle of a room with black walls, blood dripping from the chandelier above her, blood streaming down the walls, trickling towards her…. We see her clutching her head, on her knees, screaming as the blood converts itself into dark shadows engulf her as she puffs her chest out, her head facing the ceiling, her arms folded as her palms expel out scarlet magic, as she turns into the Dark Virgin….)
…..
Who knows what's right?
The lines keep getting thinner
My age has never made me wise
But I keep pushing on and on and on and on
Who knew what was right now? Who knew what was right? I didn't. I didn't know what was right or wrong anymore. Every time I sided with the good side, it always ended up in a disaster. The lines were indeed getting thinner. Each year more and more people perished. The lines of age were decreasing, a lot. As I got older, many thought I got wiser. But that was false. I always committed the same mistakes. I never learned. My age had indeed never made me wise. But even through the hard times, I always kept pushing on, no matter what.
….
We see Andy struggle and doubt herself as she's facing the constant battle, of whether she should join Kronos or not….
We switch to another setting as Andy screams in agony as she sees hybrids get slain in the most brutal ways posible, no one is paying attention to these deaths, only her, as she witnesses hybrids fall to the ground, dead…..
We switch once again and see her struggle with herself, and falling into Tartarus' trap once more and committing the same mistake, for even as she got older, she never seemed to get wiser…..
….
There's nothing left to say now... [2x]
I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now... [2x]
There's nothing left to say now... [2x]
I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now... [2x]
When I felt weak, down, beaten, broken… I never found anything to say. For once in my life, I couldn't say anything. There was nothing left to say. I am giving up. I was giving up. I am giving up everything.
Below my soul
I feel an engine
Collapsing as it sees the pain
If I could only shut it out
I've come too far
To see the end now
Even if my way is wrong
I keep pushing on and on and on and on
Everytime I witnessed a death or saw the disaster of what I've done, I did feel that engine collapse. If I could only get rid of the pain, the anger, the grief, the misery… I had come too far to go ahead and die, (when I faced Tartarus….) there was no way I was going to give up, even if my way was wrong. Even if my plan was wrong. I didn't care, because I kept pushing on. Always. I always kept going forward, trying not to look back…..
There's nothing left to say now... [2x]
I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now...[2x]
There's nothing left to say now... [2x]
I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now... [2x]
Even if, when I saw him, I was speechless. Broken. Scared. When I had entered that tent and seen his face….. I wanted to give up. And I almost did. But I had given up before. On me. I never gave up on the rest, but I always gave up on me. Because I was always the one who kickstarted it all.
I keep falling, I keep falling down...
I keep falling, I keep falling down...
Hey!
I keep falling, I keep falling down...
I keep falling, I keep falling down...
If you could only save me
I'm drowning in the waters of my soul
Always. I always kept sinking back to that stupid quicksand pit.
"Every day, I've been lamenting myself, trying to do good to see if I can wipe that red in my files and every time I think I'm doing something good, I keep causing more trouble. I might as well die and stop doing things. I've been trapped in this…. quicksand pit for years! Every time I make an attempt to get out, I keep sinking. It's useless, I'm useless. I've never been tooken well cared for and when I do, BOOM! I cause a mayhem and I have to leave. Now, I've just stopped, I've gone rogue, figured out that I'm better off by myself and leave things how they are… I can't control their fear or hate, only mine... But noooooo, he still has to come back and torture me!"
And yet, after everything. Someone always ended up dying and for I was back, crying and grieving for another person I just lost.
I rotated my neck as my hands were beside my temples, inches away from them as I closed my eyes.
There's nothing left to say now... [2x]
I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now... [2x]
There's nothing left to say now... [2x]
I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now... [2x]
I screamed as I clutched my head. I wrapped my hands around my temples and screamed. I was done. I didn't want to suffer anymore. I just wanted to be left alone.
"It was your fault!" wailed the river. "You carry a lot of misery, and grief! All of you do, let us help you!"
"You carry a lot of guilt, regret and pain. Daughter of Helena… let us subside it.." whispered a voice.
"We know your fears, and your regrets… Are you sure, woman warrior?" said the river.
"Ready as I'll ever be.." I murmured. Several figures rose. Luke Castellan, Silena Beauregard and Charles Beckendorf. "It was your fault we're dead, you should've warned us, it was your fault we're gone, you pushed us to our own death!" they spoke.
"No, no... It- it wasn't me! I swear!" I wailed, as I started to step back in fear.
Another figure rose, I knew him. His green eyes, his pale blond hair….
"You knew he was going to die, you knew…. And you didn't do anything…. They're all dead because of you! You murderer!" he shrieked.
"No!" I yelled back as tears started to form in my eyes. "I didn't murder, I swear! It wasn't my fault!"
"It was your fault!" yelled the figures.
"NO!" we yelled back.
Soon enough, another figure began to rise, he had a long cloak and red glowing eyes.
"No, no… not him!" I shrieked.
"You useless slut, traitor, outcast, disappointment, you idiot! You are pathetic! You are a disgrace! A MONSTER!" boomed the hooded figure.
"NO!" I shrieked as tears streamed down my face.
I ran towards the river and went on one knee and stabbed the ground with my double-axe.
"ENOUGH!" I yelled.
….
"You know what you did, you will never get rid of it, you will always be a murderer, you will always carry regret, pain, sadness, misery, grief, and jealousy….. It will always be your fault, always. You are weak!"
"You killed, you murdered, you sliced and you burned. It was all your fault! If it weren't for you your friends would still be alive! Your dearest wouldn't have left you! And now you will die in agony like they did! ….You burned their faces, you stabbed them, you blinded them. You deserve what you got!...You pierced them with your arrows, you shot them with your guns!...Give up! You're worthless, useless and no one cares about you!"
"They're the monsters! They're the ones that did it! It was their fault! Their choice! HIS FAULT!"
"You killed, you murdered, you sliced and you burned. It was all your fault! If it weren't for you your friends would still be alive! Your dearest wouldn't have left you! And now you will die in agony like they did!"
"NO!" I screamed.
"NO! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! It wasn't my fault! I swear! I tried to save them! Please! Give me MERCY!" I yelled.
I felt a sickening burn across my back and shut my eyes tight. I felt bullets pierce my skin. Tears started forming and as they fell my face burned too.
"You burned their faces, you stabbed them, you blinded them. You deserve what you got!" screeched another voice.
"NO!" I yelled "Please! NO!"
I felt acid burn through my right side and as I looked down I saw that it was the stab I had received hours ago.
"You pierced them with your arrows, you shot them with your guns!" shouted another voice.
Her back started to burn and she saw him. He was in his same cloak and held a whip. He grabbed her from the throat and slammed her through the ground as he raised his whip and started to hit her with it. She screamed and screamed, tears scorching her face, her insides burning and eaten away from acid. He leaned down and grabbed a dagger as he started to write with the tip of his dagger on her neck. She screamed again and again. Her feet felt numb, suddenly she didn't feel anything, she was him. She looked sideways and saw that there was a syringe pierced through her neck. He pulled it out and smiled wickedly. She felt the contents burn through her body.
"Kill." he said.
She grabbed out her gun as he revealed the target. She got close to the target and pulled the trigger. BAM! BAM! BAM! Three gunshots to the head, the target's blood had spilled over her, but she didn't care, she was doing something good for him…..
I felt a stab through my right thigh and claws scratching my cheeks as groaned in agony. "You, you will suffer! You deserve pain! You deserve misery! You deserve those gunshots! Those injuries! You deserve those curses! You will die! Give up hope! Dying is better than staying here!" screeched the first voice
"Give up! You're worthless, useless and no one cares about you!" screamed the second voice.
Through my body I felt an excruciating pain, I was back to being a seven year old, when I first received my curses. If I disobeyed once, I would get a punishment, but if I disobeyed more than ten times, I would be forced to kill myself with my own powers.
"It was not my fault! I swear! I'm innocent!" I yelled
More tears started to burn my face even more.
The voices cackled inside my head
"You killed, you murdered with no heart! You deserve that misery, grief, pain, sadness, hopelessness….. Because you are pathetic! You are wrong doing! A slut! A traitor! An outcast! An idiot! A disgrace! A rebel! A dissapointment! A MONSTER!" they screamed.
"NO!" I roared back as I received more injuries.
I was now a bloody mass, but I wasn't dead yet, The Arai wanted me to suffer. I felt a scorching pain on my side, right where Luke had stabbed himself and killed himself….. Soon enough, I couldn't hear anymore, I saw for a brief moment that my hands were all cut up. I felt a searing pain in my neck and I yelped in pain.
"They're the monsters! They're the ones that did it! It was their fault! Their choice! HIS FAULT!" I screamed
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry for everything I've ever done! You're right! I am a slut, a disgrace, an idiot, an outcast, a wrongdoing, a rebel, a disappointment. I am a monster! I deserve that pain, misery, grief, sadness, hopelessness, regret, and shame! I am useless, I am pathetic! You're right no one used to care about me, but now they do! I DON'T DESERVE MERCY! I DESERVE TO DIE IN THE MOST CRUEL WAY POSSIBLE! I GIVE UP!" I roared.
…
"You will never make it far!" said a voice. "We will kill you! Our new master will let us kill! We will rise! We will rise from your dead bodies! Spy, you're the next target!" yelled the zombie
"Aaagh!" he yelled
"Flesh! We'll get fresh flesh!"
"No!" I roared as I grabbed my dagger and pierced through his neck. At that same time I felt a sickening pain on the right side of my neck.
"You will make a new world out of blood!" I muttered.
The zombie, which had fallen, smiled wickedly.
"We will rise! To a golden age! And you'll join us!"
"No, I won't join you….I will never join you, there will always be someone or something between Order and Chaos, always. I will join you 'till hell freezes over…" I growled as I summoned Cut-Throater and stabbed the zombie straight in the heart.
The zombie relaxed and said
"You will never escape it, ever! People will always fear you. It's your destiny!"
"I know my destiny and what I did before was hideous. I can't control other people's fear, only mine...And I don't fear him!"
…
"She's a useless asshole to me now! I don't want her anymore! Just give the disgraceful monster some water…" I heard his voice speak. I slammed a pillow against my bed in anger…
…...
"You never do anything!" he roared
…...
"You're next in his list. You won't escape him, you know your destiny and you'll always be a murderer, you'll always be a psychopath, you'll always be a useless piece of trash! You are a disgrace! You are a MONSTER!" roared Kronos.
….
"Of course she did!" growled Lycaon ``She's a trickster! A spy! A wretched girl!...Master's getting furious! Only those wretched zombies got close! He said not to let her trick us! Porphyrion's after her still.."
….
"Our new master will not give his foes any mercy! Beware Daughter of Helena! You're one of his first targets!" mumbled the monster.
…..
"Besides the master told us to take her alive and once he's done with her, then we can feast on her…" that was what one of the lycantropes had said and the Sphinx head had said
"Our new master will not give his foes any mercy! Beware Daughter of Helena! You're one of his first targets!" that just cleared it up even more.
….
"Look hybrid, Icelos wanted to delay you and so many others wanted to as well. Werewolves, Echidna's and Typhon's children, Porphyrion and the Giants and their new master. You, the demigod, the giant and the titan must leave before Porphyrion, the Giants and their new master finds you all and murders all of you." Morpheus said
The Boss came towards her.
"Mission Report." he said firmly.
Nothing.
"Mission report!" he said fiercely.
She stayed silent.
The Boss sighed angrily and pulled out some chains...Oh, she knew those chains too well… Darkness chains…
He pushed her back and wrapped her arms with them.
She compiled, he was her master, she served him, him and no one else.
"The world is thriving because of your work, my dear." he said as he placed on some gloves and an empousa handed him a tray.
He grabbed a syringe.
She knew it too well.
He tapped it as the black liquid swirled and writhed. Reddish streaks burst out as he tapped it.
The Boss removed her hair and placed his fingers across her neck. He set the needle against her skin and pushed.
She let loose a slight whimper and she turned her neck around as she writhed and groaned.
She felt the belladonna, hydra blood and melatonin course through her body. Getting absorbed by her blood. Her brain that was once full with thought, was empty. For she served him, she needed no thoughts, thoughts were for the weak, the useless, the idiots…
The Boss let her chains loose and she sat up. She grabbed a glass shard and examined herself as how she felt her body change.
Her brain was empty, her pupils were now slits….
Her brain was empty and we were both waiting,... waiting for an order.
She stood up and pulled out her sword. The Boss led her to an empty room. The room had black walls, ceiling and floor, so when the blood spilled, it wouldn't be seen as the target got murdered. There was a red and white canvas target in the center of the room, standing all alone, about 6 feet tall. She heard whimpering from behind it.
The Boss chuckled wickedly.
"Kill." he ordered.
She stood in front of her target and slashed her sword against the target with three diagonal movements. One going right to left, left to right and right to left once more. She brought her sword to the center as she stabbed the target. She stabbed it once in the center, then three more times at the top, and the center once more and near the bottom. As she stabbed, the blood splattered against the black walls. Leaving marks and trails of blood. She felt specks of blood splattering against her skin, but she didn't care, she was serving her master, the only one she was loyal to. She wrenched her blade out and it was soaked in blood.
"The world will be in forever debt with you, my dear. The world will thrive of your wonderful work, Dark Virgin." he said
She tossed her blade aside and he summoned it.
The blade levitated as it rotated silently.
Tartarus grabbed the blade and wiped off the blood with his right hand and licked it all off.
Two lycanthropes grabbed her by the arms/shoulders and brusquely turned her around and pulled her away.
The Boss flicked his hand and the canvas target was removed.
A bloody and brutally murdered corpse collapsed.
This person had been murdered in the most gruesome way ever.
You couldn't even tell if it had a face, the person was completely unrecognizable….
The Boss turned it around and grabbed a small knife as he tossed my blade aside.
He kneeled beside the corpse and he grabbed the knife and began to rip off his skin on his chest and took out his heart.
If her serum weren't injected, she would've screamed in horror, but she didn't, yet her eyes widened as the lycanthropes locked her inside her cell.
She saw that some monsters sunk back deeper into the shadows.
Tartarus examined the heart with hunger as he licked his lips and went to the counter, he placed the heart in a glass case and slammed it shut.
He neared towards my cage and grabbed me by the neck and squeezed….
As he squeezed she felt the serum remove itself, detach itself from her body, her blood and her conscience…..
I choked and he dropped me. I gasped as I glanced at the floor, everything was coming back quickly and painfully. I was breathing heavily and I groaned in pain as I gently touched the mark, his mark. I turned my head around as he moved aside and showed me the glass case.
This time, now with my conscience back, I screamed in horror.
The Boss laughed.
"This, is what you've done. The world will be in debt with you, Dark Virgin." he said.
"You murderer!" I screamed as I shook the bars of the cage.
"No." he said firmly as he flew at me and gripped the bars of the cage, his red eyes, glowing fiercely.
"You're the murderer, the world will always live in fear with you, no one loves you, no one cares, you'll never escape your destiny, because in the end you'll always, always come back to me, your true master." he snarled.
"The day I go back to you will be the day Hell freezes over." I growled.
"Oooh! Bravery, I love it! That undeniable warrior spirit, I love it!" he said with false enthusiasm.
"You'll never get away with this." I hissed as , Arachne, and the Minotaur dragged my cage away and he walked away.
The Boss turned around and smirked, his red eyes glowing once more.
"But...I just did." he said...
"Fine, if my stupid brother has claimed his daughter, then I can't target him anymore…. We'll have to change some plans. Bring forth my sons! The Gigantes! We'll need them for this task…" Tartarus said menacingly as he turned to face Arachne, who nodded and scurried out
"Fine, then it seems like my brother isn't the only threat standing between me and my glory, then it seems like he and the rest won't be the first targets on my list then….." he muttered to himself as I turned my head and peeked at him from the pillar, as a dagger slipped into his hand and he turned around and flung it
"My next target will be her." he growled as I saw that the dagger had a picture of me, dead center.
"You wretched asshole!" screamed Tartarus "What did you do!" he screeched as he slammed me against the wall.
"I-I didn't do anything!" I choked
"I didn't do anything!" mocked Tartarus "You never do anything!" he roared.
He slammed me down against the floor and picked me up by the collar of my neck and threw me onto a chair. He lifted my face with two fingers and slapped me.
"Answer me. What did you do!" he said sternly.
"I told you, I don't know!" I growled through my clenched teeth.
"I'll know, I always do…." he said as he turned around.
Sure, that's what they always say…..
A foreign land in flames, a palace empty, a broken amulet, bodies lying everywhere... lifeless in a flaming battlefield, corpses burning, a boat on fire….A dead body, A cloaked figure, Darkness rising, A valley in flames, The world in flames, Decapitated heads everywhere, Blood trickling down a thousand dead gods,
And then...
A cloaked figure stabbing at an unknown person as the screams echoed, splatters of blood covering what was a white floor, the sun setting down in an unknown land with dead bodies lying everywhere, glassy eyes open, a bloody sunset…. Blood trickling down a black wall as it glistened and continued to stream down in a straight line….
And then…. I hid across the boulders and peeked around. I saw the elevator go up. I wanted to scream. I saw Damasen and a familiar Titan fight against Tartarus. He injured them greatly and threw their bodies across. "Hey!" I yelled as I grabbed Cut-Throater and faced Tartarus. He laughed and looked super ugly. "You?! A filthy hybrid? You are no challenge to me.." he said. "Yeah, that's what everyone says.." I muttered "Before they fight me…" my brain finished and I charged….
And then, he loomed towards me laughing and he placed his hand around my throat.
"Do you think, you can stop me?" he hissed, "You will have to sacrifice someone for you to win! You, do not have that courage!"
"Yes-I-do!" I choked
Tartarus smirked in disgust
"You disgust me, you liar, traitor, you useless piece of trash… Where were you when Gaia and Kronos needed your help? Huh?" he boomed as he dropped me on the ground and turned around sharply, his black cloak fluttering around him as I was on my knees, gasping for breath.
"That, was not my fight!" I croaked
"Of course, you don't do anything!" he said innocently as he flew towards me and fell on his knees and brought two finger under my chin and lifted it sharply
"Listen to me ungrateful disgrace. You might be with them, but you'll never escape me, ever. You need me and in the end you'll always come back to me." he snarled
'Yeah, well I'll never go back to you, I'll join you once hell freezes over!" I exclaimed
"Of course you won't because you can't kill me.." he said smugly
"I'll kill you! I'll kill you before the war's over!" I told him defiantly as chains wrapped around my hands, restraining me back.
Tartarus laughed, his wicked laugh echoed across the dark room as a red glow seeped in through the walls and flames erupted.
"I'm the Primordial of the Pit dear, if you want to kill me, you have to destroy the Pit too.." he said
I bowed my head down as Tartarus revealed his whip and slashed it against the ground as he began to spin it. Every time the whip's flaming rope hit the ground, it sent sparks.
"And I'll kill you before the battle's over…" he said menacingly as he neared me….
I screamed.
And gasped as I opened my eyes and realized I was on all fours.
I was panting deeply.
As cold sweat streamed down my face.
As I began to tremble like an earthquake.
And then….
I burst to tears.
As the cold sweat and tears mingled with each other in a way I'd never be able to mingle with the rest of the world...
I was a monster.
A monster nobody cared for.
A monster…..nobody loved…..
"I need to talk,
But I don't know what to say.
I need to cry,
But I don't know how to let the tears flow.
I want to live
But I don't know if I have the courage to face another day."
"When a girl cries.
It's not usually over one thing.
It's built up anger and emotions that she's been holding in for too long."
"She's got the eyes of innocence;
the face of an angel.
A personality of a dreamer,
and a smile that hides more pain than you can ever imagine."
"Crying isn't a sign of weakness.
It's a sign of having tried too hard to be strong for too long…."
"She's been through more hell than you'll ever know.
But that's what gives her beauty an edge…
You can't touch a woman who can wear pain like the grandest diamonds around her neck."
"The enemy is fear.
We think it's hate;
But, it is fear." -Gandhi
"I'm half agony,
Half hope." -Jane Austen
A/N: 10/23/2020
Ok, so...the Dark Virgin…. So, The Dark Virgin is a servant of The Boss. One of his most faithful and loyal (when drugged) servants of the New Master. And in a way, we see that Andy is (or technically was) a Dark Virgin, a mindless assassin. As we progress, we see Andy struggle with herself, whether or not she matters, because of all of the bullying she received from The Boss, her fellow Dark Virgins, some campers at Camp Half-Blood and kids at her schools, she feels very insecure and wondering whether she's actually worth it. The Dark Virgin kinda plays a role here, because the Dark Virgin is feared, but Andy isn't. Think about it, Andy spent five years during the night as she slept as the Dark Virgin, killing mindlessly and then being brought back to her senses after doing what the Dark Virgin did and feeling guilt over it. It's kind of like Dr. Jekyll and Mister Hyde, Bucky Barnes and the Winter Soldier or Bruce Banner and the Hulk. Two distinct sides, but sharing one body. The Dark Virgin represents all of the bad, and killing side, meanwhile Andy represents the good, protecting side. In a way they're like two distinctive people, sharing one body and I love it because Andy references the Dark Virgin as her. Every Dark Virgin flashback she has is in a third person point of view, because Andy knows it's not her, not Andy. And when she comes back to her senses, it's in a first person point of view. These tiny little details are important because it tells us about Andy and her dynamic with the Dark Virgin. Because whatever the Dark Virgin does, Andy has to pay the consequence because they saw her body, not her conscience. Honestly, I'm the author of this, yet I'm still quite fascinated by this and I'm looking at this from not only a writer's point of view but in a reader's as well. I love it because it shows us that the Dark Virgin does all of the bad stuff and when Andy goes back to her conscience she gets all of the hate because they think she's the Dark Virgin, when she really isn't.
Welp, bye!
*runs away from an angry/crying/screaming mob of fanfic readers, hybrids, demigods, magicians and gods*
Also, in the last chapter, for some reason I feel like What You Made Me Do by Taylor Swift, could be a perfect song for what happened w/ The Dark Virgin. Welp, bye!