Chapter 37
Camping
It was Mrs. Hodges' rule.
Baths every other day and then Emma's lady's maid was to comb through Amy's hair carefully after each bath-all because the girl had what Emma considered to be a dry scalp, but what Mrs. Hodges warned discreetly to Emma could be nits or evidence of lice.
Emma had grown up in a household where both her father and to some extent her sister, would draw nefarious conclusions from the most mundane of symptoms. Emma, for this reason, was fairly used to silence disagreement—for what harm did it really do if her sister at thirteen had believed a mere blemish to be an impending boil? In time, it was clear that it was not a boil but no harm was done for it.
In this way, she was comfortable to agree to disagree and with respect to Mrs. Hodges, Emma did not feel it was a point worthy of argument and Amy tolerated the edict rather well. Emma however, did not follow the housekeeper's suggestion to wrap her hair in a turban as a precaution. But it did not escape her notice that Mrs. Hodges had taken to doing at all times she was in the little girl's presence. The last thing she would want was for the little girl to ask questions about the sudden change of style—and as she had not met the housekeeper prior she would have no understanding that this was not the older woman's usual method of headdress.
And she was also grateful that it would serve as some distraction for Amy, and that while the child was otherwise occupied she might seek to understand how things now stood between her and her husband. And she needed that, for when he had arrived here earlier in the day she had felt so uncertain of herself and almost felt an actor trying to appear perfectly normal within her own skin.
And if her greeting had felt tepid or if she had seemed too much unlike herself in spirit or personality, it could be explained by trying to slide into the role of what he might expect or want –without truly knowing what he might expect or want from her. It was an arduous task to be sure, full of guesswork and layman attempt at prediction. How could one behave naturally amidst those conditions?
For he was back and that could mean that he'd sorted out his conflictions, that he'd made up his own mind about how to proceed—how things ought to be. But if he knew his own mind, he seemed to give off very little that was telling, apart from clear shock at meeting Amy—which was really the only discernable flag marking to the landscape of his thoughts on anything at all.
And she found herself at war with her own mind and emotions—each of which seemed even split over whether to inquire as to his findings or to let him inform her in his own time. And she was not sure which one was preferable—for one had the merits of delaying the inevitable. Obviously, if it were to be bad news, then that seemed the preferred option –to exist in a state of unknowing and ignorant denial –or as close to it as one could arrive with the knowledge that there was at some stage to be truth proclaimed which may not be to their favor or liking.
And it was as she contemplated this, carrying an armful of blankets and pillows down the main stairway that she came upon him, George Knightley, the very source of her thoughts. And it was because he was a good degree taller than her that when they stopped, and he was on the step below hers, that he was still level to her, meeting her gaze just over the level of the pillows.
And it all just seemed so intense and it was almost a throwback to the first days living in this house and in her new role as his wife, for she felt now once more with a resounding force that she did not know how to be or how to compose herself in the way he might want. She felt hesitant, and she had very few other occasions in her whole life to look back on to find that same sensation present.
He broke then tension easily enough, for it was possible that he did not feel the same tenseness in the air around them. If he did, it did not seem to colour his words—as he sounded near enough the same.
"Where are you taking those?" he asked, the lightness he undoubtedly felt was contained in his casual tone.
Her immediate thought was jealous, how could he be so easy? But then she found herself falling quickly into the pattern she often did in other situations—perhaps that of hostess –and perhaps more arm's length than she would have wanted to be in her heart of hearts, but it didn't feel a choice really. It was almost second nature.
"I'm taking them to the parlour," she explained, and she placed a tight smile in an effort to mimic her normal upbeat countenance. And because she could be no other way, she continued with her explanation. "The top one is a fort, the bottom sets are bedding," she explained.
"Ah, allow me to carry them for you then," he said, and as simple as that, she found he had reached over the top of the pile and below it to secure the bundle in his own arms. It just so happened that his arm at the top of the pile was suddenly directly against the skin of her entire forearm. And all at once, she imagined this would be the sensation one might have had when standing a degree too near to Benjamin Franklin's famous kite. It was as if from the moment his warm skin connected with her own that a current was moving beneath her very skin, and that was to stay nothing of the sensation of when he pulled the light load from her arms, his own skin trailing the span from where his fingertips had set just above her elbow, down her arm and then over her own fingers. And it felt to her like it was at a languish speed—as if a song was playing and the tempo was suddenly switched to the slowest of paces and yet it was the opposite effect on her heart which suddenly jumped to race at a pace the most rapid of them all.
She is stunned for a moment or two, her own arms hanging lifeless at her sides before she tries to begin talking once more, "George," and she froze once again when he has stopped one stair into his descending motion and has turned back to look at her directly. And if she was not blushing before she wonders if she is now, for she was not expecting to call to herself his full attention. "I, well I, what I meant to tell you is that I'd taken on one of your ideas" she starts off with a tremble sounding voice, a bit too much like Jane Fairfax for her own liking, and perhaps it is that simple self-reflection that allows her to correct it quickly and gain back her normal, more confident way of speaking.
"When Amy came to stay, rather to visit us here that is, it seemed to me that it was cruel to make a little girl stay in a guest room all alone by herself, and although Isabella and I had sleepovers in each other's beds at times growing up –we were sisters and young then and the idea seemed hardly appropriate as an adult. So I thought of the idea, your idea really, and suggested to Amy the idea of camping indoors and we've sequestered the parlour for the task—but I bring the blankets, pillows, and bedding up and down at the beginning of each day and before supper every day as to keep in Mrs. Hodges good graces –I can hardly imagine her idea on the subject," she explained. "And all that to say if you wished to join our indoor expedition, we are at present about to start to canoe trip down the Nile River, and there is another lounger that could be commissioned for sleeping and ample space in the imaginary riverboat"
To her delight, he smiled at her words," I appreciate the invitation, it sounds fascinating," he told her.
"Oh yes, it really is, Amy saw a pack camel almost take off our guide hat with one bite, but he was quick to swat it and reprimanded it for its disobedience and he promised that we would have a different, more jovial camel on the ride to the pyramids"
"Ah, while I'm not sure my feelings on you traveling the globe with a male guide without me, I think it best I sleep in our bed,"
She smiled, perhaps it was his wording or maybe just maybe that he considered their bed more his own than his own bed which for many months he had abandoned in order to share hers. It warmed something deep inside to know that even without her presence he would still think of their bed as where he wished to sleep. But perhaps she ought not to read too much into it for he was a creature of habit after all.
"You ought not worry about Bakari, his wife is also along on the trip, and she waters the camels just like Rebekah in the bible story," Emma told him, and she could tell by his face that he was trying to discern if she was teasing him or if she and Amy had actually devised that depth of backstory for the members of the caravan.
She laughed then, "We did name him Bakari but I'm not sure if he is married or not," she concluded. "but George I would be remiss not to tell you that I could be a world away from you and never for a moment consider any other man, real or imaginary," and although she wanted it to be airy in tone, it landed very heavy between them, so to lighten the feeling, which she felt inclined to before they could dwell on her words. She cleared her throat and continued, "Now let's hurry to assemble the fort before Amy is done with her bath,"
And he complied, and they worked together at the task in what could only be described as a peaceful silence, the sort that Emma thought ought not to exist but did, and felt oddly normal—having none of the signature markers of the other kind. It was comfortable and there felt no obligation to break it or improve upon it. And his efforts proved that he was a more proficient fort builder than Amy and she, for it was clearly a better design than any that they had assembled hitherto.
It may have been the fact that he was home again, but whatever the reason, she fell asleep happy, listening to Amy's light breathing from the adjacent tent.
The older woman cleared her throat, hesitant to interrupt the familiar setting, "Mrs. Knightley—" she started but broke off and Emma's eyes darted to her instantly as the title for it was so very foreign to her ears, the staff often just called her Ma'am.
"Yes?" she urged.
"Mrs. Elton is here to see you, Ma'am," Hodges told her stepping further into the parlour where she and Amy were working on the child's letters and about to commence reading small words.
"Me?" Emma asked foolishly, but feeling really very surprised by it and a little thunderstruck because of it and foolish all at the same time for who else could the housekeeper be meaning? But the Lady in question had not been invited and alternatively had sent no word that she was planning to come or wished for a meeting on the matter. Surely in London, she would not have presumed to drop in on anyone there for any reason.
And the all more what did Mrs. Elton mean by it? For it was one thing to drop into the home of someone of the lower classes or who was down in their circumstances—to check-in on the sick or bring charity but it was another thing altogether where social equals or betters were concerned. For anyone who was not truly impoverished or in urgent need, an appointment was always made.
"Yes, I've set her in the sitting room off of the breakfast room," she added looking at where Amy sat in the low chair playing with letter blocks, "tea service and biscuits will likely meet you there,"
"Very well," she agreed, though she almost wanted to ask for the staff to forego the treats in spite because of the woman's ungrateful spirit at the previous tea.
Hodges nodded and turned to go, and then Emma addressed the others with her. "George darling," she plied softly and her eyes and tone naturally fell into the style she used when seeking a favour.
His eyes left his reading material instantly and were focused on her –his look was almost stern—or at very least a sharp dissecting focus.
"Mrs. Elton has arrived expectantly –would you be able to continue on to the sight words portion of our lesson? I've made this list," she stooped to retrieve a sheet; atop the other papers, she had been gathering as their learning materials."She has only seen them twice before so you will have to be patient—but patience is something that you are very good at so it should be no trouble at all. If you will mark for me here the easy ones and the ones that prove more difficult, then that would be exceedingly helpful" she supplied. "And then when you are finished, I would hope to be back but if I am not, then perhaps you would play?"
He gave her a small nod, and her smile bloomed into true brilliance.
She turned to Amy, "Mr. Knightley is a much smarter teacher than I and he also knows a good many games and I'm sure if you work very well at the learning then you will be delighted to play anyone of them—and if I am very fortunate and the meeting does not take very long, then I will be very lucky to join you both to play them,"
The girl then nodded, seeming very excited at the prospect of a game.
Emma took direct steps to be closer to where her husband sat; she leaned close to his ear, whispered a thank you, kissed his cheek, and she paused in the doorway before leaving to look back at him and his eyes were very much fixed on her-his expression equally dissecting as if he too wondered what she meant by it. She held back the flustering sensation, "Oh, and I meant to say if you finish with the English language before I return you may start in on Chinese," she added with a smirk and then left for the sitting room.
The maid with the tea service stood waiting for her to enter, Emma smiled, though she and her husband did not entertain very often Donwell staff was all very well versed in timing and protocol. The girl held back the tea as not to make her mistress appear late. "Thank you, and will you also direct a matching set of tea service brought to the main parlour for George and Amy—an extra setting of milk as Amy does not like her tea very hot at all?"
'Yes, Ma'am," she agreed and Emma smiled before opening the door for their entrance.
Mrs. Elton, turned as she entered her smile as wide as she had ever seen and her ensemble was very bright—chartreuses both yellow and green, bright pinks, and orange print fabric with a wild floral design. Emma was sure she had never seen anything quite so bold –especially not in Highbury.
"There is news about our Jane! We ought to both give ourselves a pat on the back for our esteemed workmanship," she told her –without a single pause for greeting.
It was odd, the strange sensation of not really knowing exactly how to conduct one's self when the other person so grossly violated social convention.
"Mrs. Elton, I'm glad to be able to receive you on such short notice, it is fortunate that today I was not occupied such as to make it impossible. And to hear you have news about Jane, I'm very sure I cannot take credit for any workmanship for I told her I would not interfere without her request and she has not asked anything of me. If it is a victory, it must be a victory all your own but I am happy to hear of it over tea,"
"Jane is going to Ireland to accept a post at the beginning of September," she informed looking very self-satisfied and Emma was not sure if it was only to do with having been victorious or having the choicest piece of new information before anyone else on the subject.
"In September? To Ireland? To being teaching so soon? I thought she wanted to stay in Highbury with her Aunts until the fall or perhaps even the New Year?"
"Well, she did but she obviously saw that I was right and she was wrong and she changed her mind. I didn't have to do anything to convince her I was right, she must have come to her senses on her own. She came to me almost as soon we arrived back from that excursion asking for the information for the Donoghue's –Mrs. Donoghue has some relation to my brother-in-law Mr. Suckling in Sussex though I don't remember exactly in what way. The Donoghue's are a very well to do family—I've never seen it but I've heard their estate is at least as big as Donwell—and the house too but perhaps the rooms are—"
"Would you like one? I assure you I did not make these," Emma said cutting her off with the thrust of the plate of small biscuits.
"I must not—I'm getting so puffy Mr.E is undoubtedly going to think I'm with child at any moment now," she protested but to Emma's eyes she looked the same as ever and simply more colorfully dressed. "I find it so hard to maintain any sort of walking regime in the country—for in London it was so easy there was so much walking to do –Hyde Park or around town in the ritzy areas, you know of course, but here in Highbury there isn't a single place worth walking –nothing to see and no one of any importance to hope to run into –oh it has been devastating on my figure."
And Emma thought the flicker of laughter that threatened –they were very different people, and she took another cookie hoping this meeting would pass a little faster with sweets to comfort. Truthfully she longed to be back in the company of George and Amy.
"Anyways, they are a first-rate family –four school-age children at present and two others up and coming to be eventual pupils and Jane is very lucky that the position was still open and that Mrs. Donoghue was willing to take her on, and on shorter notice than might have been otherwise I might add."
"Yes, I suppose that is fortunate,"
"Yes, and it brings me to the other matter—back in London I was quite the central figure in my group of friends and it was always me that was looked to when a thing was needed doing, such as a welcoming soiree or throwing a sensational goodbye party for a friend that was leaving London and I recognize that here in this place it is you that occupy that role and I was wondering if we might plan a farewell for Jane in the next few weeks together?"
And although there was a time when both these things combined, a party praising Jane and wishing her farewell, not to mention planning it alongside Mrs. Elton, would have been Emma's very own sixth circle of hell, and perhaps seventh for she very likely would not have thought up something worse! Emma found perhaps she had changed –at least with regard to one of those things-for she realized she did not mind the idea of throwing Jane a party. And it was not merely because it was a goodbye party and Jane would be leaving –she didn't feel the same deep vexing at the mention of her name, she didn't dislike her for merely being so ridiculously perfect or simply for breathing and being Jane Fairfax. Now, she would not go quite so far as to think she would miss her, she did not begrudge the task of honouring her with a party and inviting all of their friends from near and far.
"Yes, it is a good idea to throw Jane a going away party and I would allow your help in whichever way you'd like,"
"Oh, it will be the very best! Only the very best for our Jane," Mrs. Elton declared, and perhaps Emma was instantly regretting allowing her to join in on the planning.
Hiya! Not dead –sorry to those who asked if I was okay! I'm well, very busy with work but doing alright.
After this, Go read & REVIEW No Indeed by ppemberleys – it is a cool spin on what could have been accomplished faster in Emma. Very adorable :)
Rubandepluie asked if I have seen the new Emma movie and yes, I had just streamed it the day or two before I was asked that! I was also going to ask you guys in the previous chapter if I should watch it or what your thoughts were but I had forgotten. I'm a 2009 stickler, loved that one to the moon and back. But there were elements of the new one I loved –their dance scene! And maybe some of the laughing moments.
I abhor the nosebleed scene! Just no. They could have put it someplace else for comedy but not in that scene!
Knightley felt so young –I didn't feel the same tension that is there in every other version because they feel the same age in the new one. I liked the costumes and felt they were well done. This Emma is the queen of the jackets and hats! Similar to 2009 they chose very nice colours and accents for Emma's outfits and she looked amazing in every scene.
But yeah, what did you guys think of it?
canaryinacoalmine: Yes, you throw that man over the hedge! Hah, you made me laugh. This man does not know how he is coming across! Emma was a little less than transparent –so I imagined him jumping to all sorts of conclusions trying to figure the whole thing out! Yes, they need to work through stuff together! I think we will find they are on the path in the right direction.
whitefire24: Thank you for the reviews! I agree George can be super harsh and I SO agree that his throwaway line in the proposal was not enough! I do think he means well by in –he wants only the best from Emma and for Emma and he takes it a notch to far at times. I tend to think of it from a passion is passion kind of way. If he cared less he'd have shown less desire to see Emma do right in all things!
Rose and Psyche: Thank you for the review. I personally don't think they are inaccuracies. So far as I understand, women in 19th century England would not have had the right to property and inheritance in the same way men did (with rare exceptions). This is why the Bennett's are so concern about Mr. Collins taking it all and wanting a Bennett daughter to marry back in to keep the roof over their heads when Mr. Bennet dies. The same is true with the Dashwood's –this isn't special circumstances–it is the reality in places where linage was designed to keep inheritances intact (Primogeniture). The absence of this is why Germany and Belgium and others have so many Duchies and broken lines –because they had a different pattern of distribution of inheritance and title which didn't keep wealth consolidated. Even at the end of the century women weren't able to have their own banking affairs (Ibsen's A Dollhouse was written around the paternalism seen everywhere at that time, almost a full century later). In this case, Hartfield would have rightfully passed to Henry (oldest Grandson) when he became the age of majority at 21. I would imagine John would have had something like regent rights until that time, which is why John is handling all the affairs related to it in this story. Could John and Isabella have allowed Emma live there-of course but there wouldn't have been much of a story, and I think most people would have recoiled at the idea of a sudden orphan living alone. Women were fragile, somebody pass the smelling salts!
The money in trust is referred to in the first chapters and Knightley implies it was to be a dowry –that would be accurate for the times as well. It likely would have been wrapped up in government bonds with a percentage kickback every year to be her annual income for dresses and gloves and ribbons and pretty things.
If she wasn't given permission to live at Hartfield alone, what could she really do with her money? A woman married or otherwise would not be allowed to sign a contract, own property in her own name or carry out any of the basic things required to 'live alone'—mothers and daughters usually had some provision by their next of kin (son or brother that could sign on their behalf) and would live similar to the Bates or Dashwood's (modestly in clusters or sent to live with extended family). There isn't a lot written legally with reference to unmarried single women as they were not thought to exist in the eyes of the courts. Women got married and that was all (we know what isn't true but that was the atmosphere of the times). Even based on Emma's age (20 at the start of this fic) she would have been not-yet the age of majority by the legal definition. It would have been absolutely expected that she move to live with next of kin (Isabella). It was not expected that she get married but she chose to do that anyways. In my mind, it was her seeking her own autonomy over her life. Women were thought of as chattel for a very long time and it wasn't about to change in Emma's lifetime.
Hartfield is smaller, that is true. I don't know if Austen paints a clear picture of where their annual income is generated from, but from what I know of that time period it was usually banking interest (wealth accruing wealth) and tenants on smaller pieces of land—which was very common for wealthy people. People didn't just own a house in the country without land (they did own houses in town without land)—the very location would suggest ownership of land. I can't imagine Hartfield not having farming tenants as well as people living in the region under their lease because of the value of land (prestige) and the fact that many bought up land when it became possible under British law. (Shift from landholder (vassal to the king) to landowners). Tenancy was expected and it follows much of the underlying feudal taxation model –old system, new face! My thinking is since Woodhouses were unarguably wealthy and had a country manor, and are considered the very utmost of Highbury society, they very liking had people paying their taxes and increasing their income by living on other areas of their property.
Sorry! That was the wild history extravaganza nobody wanted or asked for! ;) While I could have written this story to have Emma be an exception to the rule, but instead I placed her in the most likely of situations for her time period.
To the Spanish speaking reviewer: Thank you for the review! I love reviews in other languages it is so exciting to run them through the translator –like opening a gift! Thank you for your kind words! I have no plan to abandon the story! Updates might be slow but this will be completed eventually!
Very grateful for all the reviews and everyone's patience as I endeavor to keep writing this story! Until next time!
