Author's Note:

Hi everyone! So, I know it's been a while since the last update (Which I apologize tremendously for) but my laptop fried, and I haven't been able to get a new one until recently. I was on my way to updating the new chapter back in, I believe it was October and the darned thing shut off and wouldn't turn back on. I did take it to a shop, but they said that buying a new one was cheaper, so I just bided my time until I could afford a new one, but I can say that this one works SO much better! (: I was unsure how to update you guys on exactly what was going on seeing as you don't get notifications for updates to old chapters, and I didn't want to put anyone's hope up with a new chapter. But I'm back with a shorter chapter purely so that I could finally get an update out so hopefully it's smooth going from here!


Rey looked into the eyes of innocent youth, the future of the Jedi standing in what served as an adopted training room thanks to Poe. It gave her privacy from the stern glares of the rest of the Resistance who had yet to forgive her. That was fine. Their acceptance wasn't what she was looking for, and the part of her that wanted to seek out their forgiveness stepped into Ben Solo's shoes and embraced it as punishment for leaving him in the first place.

She would need to train in military history, diplomacy, science, investigation, medical science… Resistance toward mind probes and interrogations-something that she'd practiced since first running into Kylo Ren-and to hone her own abilities toward the light side. Looking around at the sudden slew of new trainees, Rey surmised that she was way in over her head.

Way, way in.

One not fully-fledged Jedi attempting to train six force sensitive children and Finn without Ben who had training by Luke Skywalker-less limited than hers had been at the very least. She wished that she would have at least asked him where to start before she came back-it wasn't like she had textbooks to refer to. "Good. All of you." It wouldn't be as simple as holding out her hand and feeling the Force flow through to her fingers. An object was the first step. "Let the Force flow through you. A stone in the air feels the same as a stone on the ground." She instructed. "Let it show you."

A couple of them straggled behind, their stones wavering the tiniest amount, and as much as Rey wanted them to learn so that she could consider her work done and embark on a long-winded journey to find Ben Solo, such feats were proving to take time. Much longer she feared than what she had promised. Regardless, the hope of finding him now could all have been a pointless attempt at picking something to hold onto. He was still blocking her out, closing himself off as though he were in a place where their bond wouldn't reach.

The space between them was void of feeling; not a single call or interruption would give her the opportunity that she so desperately yearned for to finally talk. She'd rehearsed apologies and reassurances and promises, but each fell hollow and empty in the abyss that stretched further between them with the passing days. She still owed one to Finn. Her leisurely stroll through the jungles of Ajan Kloss had been the first step. She'd found a stone; bright, yellow and probably a gem that someone had mistakenly dropped, or a collectible from one of the many hoarder species on the planet.

She'd decided that it was as good a peace offering as any.

Rey didn't have a Kyber Crystal or the means to make a new lightsaber to offer as consolation instead. She made due with what she had.

Her thumb ran over where it nestled into her palm, her eyes fixed on the children albeit her attention elsewhere outside of the room. Outside of the planet even, traversing somewhere far off through the galaxy with his only fuel being a hatred that she felt in herself too. Disappointment was immeasurable. Tarnishing the few relationships that she did have was a recurring theme over the past few weeks.

Hey, Finn. It's not a big deal, but I found this gemstone and it was beautiful and I thought of you…

Too strong. Way too strong.

Um, Finn. This stone symbolizes companionship and adversity in spite of…

Too much of a mouthful. Why were these things always so difficult?

The hiss of the doors stole her attention away with Finn's entry, a vague expression of surprise betraying her attempts to act natural where he was concerned. If he hadn't pretended like everything was fine and his bruises from their training altercation underneath his jacket, seh may not have felt such heavy guilt. They hadn't talked-not personally-and she found the situation too awkward to approach him with while he was with Poe or Rose-something they noticed.

Neither had taken the initiative to explain it just yet.

"Hey," he greeted her, sounding just as neutral as she expected.

Her expression fell, offering a half-hearted greeting in return. She stepped to the side to offer a few feet of space to give him a clearer view of the room, more so the children's progress, but he didn't take it.

Somehow that made her feel worse. "They're doing well with just a few days of instruction."

Finn bobbed his head in agreement, slowly turning to eye the rest of the room, his hands snaking into the comfort of his pockets. "They are."

"I can't help but to think that I still don't really know what I'm doing." Rey tried again, an awkward laugh stifling through her lips, her saliva feeling much thicker than before. She swallowed, wringing her hands in front of her. Her gaze turned downcast.

"Yeah well," he shrugged. "They're better off with you than me. I think that they've made more progress than I have."

Her heart dropped, brows creasing into a scowl at the floor. "They still have trouble honing their emotions. You have a better grasp of that in most cases." She murmured.

"I have to put up with you and Poe." He reminded her. "Someone has to be the level-headed one out of the three." When Rey looked up, he wasn't looking at her directly. His eyes swept out over the training room in concentration, the attempt at a joke a vast leap compared to the radio silence over the last few days. It instilled her with a bit of hope, but it was a joke that he didn't acknowledge. Any other time she would roll her eyes and groan and they would share in a mutual less one-sided laugh.

One that didn't sound so pained coming from her in the form of an awkward chortle.

"What about Rose?"

"If we considered Rose, there'd be no competition." A smile slipped, but she didn't have time to acknowledge it before it was gone. Finn cleared his throat, ducking his head. "Poe wanted to talk to you. That's why I'm here."

"Oh."

"I'll keep an eye out." He waved a hand over the training room.

"Thanks. Try not to let the room burn down before I get back." Rey murmured sheepishly-a lighthearted joke that he didn't return, and without another word, she left Finn's side to leave the room and make way for the general's new office.

She bobbed and weaved through crowded and winding hallways to find the office-avoiding giving much reaction to the subtle glares, it didn't take long to find Poe, standing at his desk full attention but with ever as apologetic an expression as she had ever seen on him before. Had the circumstances not been so unfortunate before, she may have just asked what ushered such a look from him.

Except of course, she knew. What else could it have been?

She averted her eyes, stealing a guilty glance to the floor.

"We're happy you're back." Poe started. "I know that it wasn't easy with-everything with Kylo-"

"Why have you summoned me here?"

Poe sighed, a long drawn out one that bled exasperation. His hands braced against his hips, ducking his head low as he mulled over words that wouldn't come. Gnawing on his lower lip, he threw a hand out to the side, gesturing vaguely at the air beside him. "Why do you think? We needed you."

"To train the force sensitives." Rey answered.

He nodded. "And help Finn. You were always a part of the Resistance. You always will be. I don't know why you're suddenly second-guessing your permission."

"Because I nearly killed some of them leaving Crait." She reminded him, and for a moment she thought that he hadn't remembered, but the subtle flinch told her otherwise. An eyebrow raised, and Rey scoffed in disbelief. "But Ben isn't welcome? He was Resistance. We cast out our only hope of dealing with General Hux-"

"Do not pull this back around on me." Poe accused. "You came back. We gave you the choice. Finn asked you and you agreed and left. That wasn't us. He made his choice and you made yours."

"We could've made a spot for him." Rey argued. "It didn't have to be like this."

"I don't know what you want me to do!" His voice cut through the air an octave, bouncing off of steel walls and hitting her with sheer force. He seemed to catch her sudden waver, her gaped expression for he backpedaled. "I just-I can't do anything about this now. Not yet."

Rey was throwing her own insecurities on him, demanding that he do something when she was the one at fault. She knew that, and yet she was the one still arguing about who had decided Ben's fate. She had, when she'd told him that she was going back to the Resistance, abandoning him in the fields to fend for himself. It pained her heart, and suddenly she didn't blame him for blocking her out; she'd done the same for lesser reasons-and that wasn't Ben at the time. "I just wanted to help him. I didn't want him to turn back from the dark side just to be cast out a traitor."

"He's committed more war crimes than Darth Vader-" Poe cut himself off, fingers snaking back through his dark brown curls. "Never mind. I didn't bring you in here to talk about him, I brought you in here to talk about Hux and the New Order. What we're going to do."

"What can we do? Fight? We lost a lot of our numbers in the battle of Exogol."

"But we also gained a lot of numbers thanks to Leia. We were heard, and people came from the farthest reaches of the galaxy to help. But we're not ready for another war." Poe walked around his desk, connecting his fingers with his wrist in a taller stance that bled his authority. It wasn't consciously. "The sensitives are still kids. It'll take time."

"So what are you proposing?" Rey craned her neck to look at him, him stopping at her side now. One hand wavered, but came to clap on her shoulder. She didn't shake him loose.

"I'm proposing that we spend some time getting some supplies ready." He suggested. "Go over our inventory, think about a new base somewhere off grid."

"And you want me to scout for a new base?"

Poe nodded. "With Finn preferably. It'd do the two of you some good."

Rey grimaced. "You heard?"

"I think the whole Resistance did. They're not looking at you like that because of Kylo Ren." He mused aloud, walking out of the office with her in tow. Members rushed around them in a much bigger haste than what she'd noticed before. "Try to see if you can find somewhere that they're not likely to look, we'll relocate and go from there. It can't be any of the planets we've been to before."

"Are you thinking they're going to build another planet destroyer?"

"If Hux is as crazy as I think he is, then yes. He won't do anything until he finds Kylo Ren, and that buys us some time."

"Shouldn't we be warning Ben?"

Poe shrugged. "You tell him, he will go straight to Hux himself. Do you want to risk that?"

She sighed. "No."

"Good. Do this favor for me, make it up with Finn, and we'll reconvene with a report by the end of the week. Deal?"

"Alright."

"Thank you. After this, I promise, but he needs to be left in the dark for now and if we can find him, then we'll tell him everything, keep him out of Hux's way."

"After the Resistance."

"After the Resistance." A clap on her arm and Poe was turning to her with a newfound resolve. A means to make things up on both sides, however late she knew that already was. Had they been just a few hours earlier, a couple of days or even weeks, then maybe they would have a chance. She didn't see her convincing Ben anymore now than she had been before. "Don't worry. He can handle himself."

"I'm not worried about him."

"Sure, Rey."

Rey was worried, but she only feared that he would trek down the same dark path without her there for reprimand….

She stopped.

She felt it, yet she couldn't describe it. Something nibbling on her nerves, on those who wandered the halls of the base. Bitter anticipation possessed them all, only Poe beside her seemed oblivious of it. Confused, if anything. Someone knocked into her shoulder, mumbling a rushed apology before they were off again.

A glance was exchanged with Poe.

The filtration system whirred into a somber hum. The noise outside sounded like a quiet pinging, or a muffled crescendo of hisses. Then she recognized the resounding din of faraway blasters, the shriek of resistance. The screams. Then at last, Rey felt death. Wide eyes snapped to Poe, and without wasting another second they ran for the bay door.