Author's Note: For the past five months I've been posting a new chapter of this story every Monday. But we're now in the middle of NaNoWriMo, with the holidays fast approaching, and right now, I just can't keep up that pace. So for the remainder of the year, I've decided to post a new chapter every two weeks, instead of every week. I'm hoping to return to my regular posting schedule in January, but for now, I need a bit of breathing room. Thank you all for your patience and understanding.
Chapter Thirty-one
By the time Brienne left Jaime's chamber, another hour had passed. Although she'd been curious about what had happened between Sansa and Gendry, her curiosity had not compared to her desire to be with Jaime again. The night before had been glorious! And the hour she had just spent in his arms had been just as wonderful. It had been difficult to let Jaime go, to walk away, even though she knew she would see him again later that day. They were just rediscovering each other, and if Brienne had had her way, she would have stayed in bed with him all day and into the night. For once, she didn't care about duty and honor. All she cared about was Jaime. But duty was calling, no matter how badly she wished to ignore it, and she had to find Sansa, for the sake of everyone's sanity.
The afternoon meal had just passed by the time Brienne found Sansa walking through the palace gardens, surrounded by a swarm of fashionable young ladies, all of them hanging on her every word. In preparation for the feast, Bran had hired a team of gardeners to restore the grounds to their former glory, and while there was still much work to be done, Sansa looked like a fairy queen holding court amongst the flowers. How much things had changed since her first visit to the Red Keep! She was no longer the disgraced daughter of the traitor Ned Stark. No. Now, she was the most admired, most powerful woman in Westeros, and everyone wanted to be close to her.
When Sansa finally saw Brienne, she stopped, forcing the entire party to stop as well. Her eyes locked with Brienne's, she said, "Would you ladies please excuse us? I must have a word with the Lord Commander of the Kingsguard."
In an instant, the ladies of the court scattered in a flurry of colorful silks. Soon enough, Brienne and Sansa were alone with only the roses for company.
"I hear you've had an eventful night," Sansa said, a knowing smile quirking her lips.
"I've heard you have as well."
Sansa turned away, walking a calm, straight path to the wall that bordered the gardens, overlooking Blackwater Bay.
Brienne followed without a word, and together, they sat down on the edge of the wall, turning so they could face each other. Sansa was clearly playing coy, and Brienne didn't have the slightest bit of patience for it, not when she could be doing much more important things.
"Well?" Brienne said when they were finally settled.
"Well, what?"
"You know what. Lord Tyrion was at Jaime's door just an hour ago, spouting some nonsense about you being engaged."
"Was he?" Sansa seemed intrigued by the news, but not the least bit startled. In fact, there was almost an air of satisfaction in her voice.
"Yes, he was. But I'm sure that comes as no surprise to you."
"Tell me what happened between you and Jaime last night," Sansa said, purposefully changing the subject.
Brienne felt no shame in what she and Jaime had done the night before. They were both consenting adults, and neither one of them had taken any vow that precluded them from engaging in an intimate relationship. Besides, Sansa already seemed to know the truth, so there was no point in trying to deny it. "I think you know what happened."
"And you're sure this is what you want?" Sansa asked, her tone taking on a note of genuine concern. "I know you love him, but love doesn't always solve everything. And just because you spent the night together, doesn't mean you have to spend the rest of your lives together. If you ever want to return to Winterfell, I would be more than happy to have you as Lord Commander of the Queensguard."
Brienne shook her head. "Thank you for the offer, but no. I have no desire to leave the Six Kingdoms. I'm proud of what I've accomplished here, and I don't want to leave. Besides, I think I'd like to see where things go with Jaime. I know that what happened last night doesn't solve all our problems, and it certainly didn't change what he did, but it's a step in a new direction, and I'm not ready to retreat just yet."
"You don't ever retreat, do you?"
"No. Never," Brienne replied, unable to mask her own pride. She was nothing if not brave. She never ran from a challenge, not even when the odds were against her.
"You know what Bran wants, don't you?"
Brienne was surprised by the question. It had been nearly two months since she'd had a private word with the king, and in that time, she had done her best to push aside the memory of their last conversation. Not long after Jaime's return, Bran had told her that she wouldn't be Lord Commander for long, and Brienne had found the thought most unsettling. Even though things were going well between her and Jaime, she simply couldn't imagine ever abandoning her post.
"I don't know what Bran wants," she answered, "though I suspect it has something to do with me leaving King's Landing."
"I think Bran is expecting you to marry Lord Jaime and become Lady of Casterly Rock."
Brienne laughed. "You can't be serious. Has he said this to you?"
"In his own way."
"Well, I can assure you that is not going to happen. I've worked too hard to get where I am, and the people of the Six Kingdoms need me. They need Jaime too. He has done a great deal to ensure the safety and security of this city, and of Westeros as a whole. I'm glad he returned to King's Landing, and it would be a shame if he ever had to leave."
"He'll have to leave someday. Casterly Rock can't stay vacant forever."
"I suppose that's true."
"So the question is, when he does go, will you be going with him?"
Brienne stared at Sansa in silence, desperately searching for an answer. Although, since his return, Brienne had often fantasized about sharing Jaime's bed, she had never once thought about what might come afterwards. Jaime was now Lord of Casterly Rock, and that meant that he would someday have to find himself a bride and produce a legitimate heir. It was something Brienne didn't even want to think about. She couldn't imagine being any man's wife, not even Jaime Lannister's, and yet, she couldn't bear the thought of him marrying another.
"I . . . I don't know," Brienne finally replied.
"He'll need to take a wife."
"I know."
"Do you really want him to marry someone else? Because if you don't go with him, he'll have no choice."
Brienne turned away and looked out over the bay. This wasn't a subject she wanted to discuss, not even with Sansa. She was still reeling from the joy of spending the night in Jaime's arms, and she didn't want to worry about the future. She wanted to take what happiness she could and enjoy it to the fullest before it was inevitably taken away from her. Because even though she loved Jaime and she knew Jaime loved her, she was sure that their happiness couldn't last forever. Nothing ever did.
"Jaime will do what he has to do," Brienne said, unable to look at Sansa as she spoke. "And I will do what I have to do. Whatever that is."
"You deserve to be happy, Brienne." There was a softness in Sansa's voice that bespoke true friendship.
Brienne dragged her eyes away from the water and looked at Sansa again. Although Brienne hadn't noticed it earlier, Sansa looked happy. There was a gleam in her eyes that Brienne had never seen before, and she wondered if Gendry Baratheon really had managed to steal her friend's heart in the course of a single evening.
"So do you," Brienne said, more than happy to change the subject.
Sansa straightened her spine and idly fluffed out her skirts. "I am happy. I'm going to be married."
"Yes, so I've heard. But the question is, to whom?"
A slow smile spread across Sansa's lips, making her look far more mischievous than she had any right to. "To a lord of the Six Kingdoms, of course."
"Yes, but which lord?"
"I'm afraid I can't tell you," Sansa said. "It's a secret, and I wouldn't want the wrong person to find out before it is officially announced at the feast this evening."
"You mean, you don't want Lord Tyrion to find out."
"Yes." Sansa's tone turned serious. "I think this is something he needs to hear for himself, and he needs to hear it from me."
"Are you sure that's wise?"
"I certainly wouldn't want him to hear it from someone else."
"What I mean is, don't you think it would be better to have a private audience with him before the feast tonight? Then, you could tell him privately and save him some embarrassment."
"And why would I want to save him any embarrassment?" Sansa asked archly.
Why, indeed! Although Tyrion had wounded Sansa deeply, Brienne had thought that Sansa had already worked through her pain, that she'd come to King's Landing to ask Tyrion to be her husband. But obviously, she'd been wrong.
"I think you're playing with fire," Brienne said, her sense of honor compelling her to tell Sansa exactly what she thought. "And you need to be careful, lest you get burned."
Sansa laughed. "You needn't worry. I'm not going to get hurt. I promise."
"And Lord Tyrion?" Even though Brienne wasn't particularly fond of Tyrion Lannister—he meddled far too much for her liking—he meant the world to Jaime, and for that reason alone, she didn't want to see him suffer any more than he already had.
"Lord Tyrion will get what he deserves."
Brienne sighed, realizing that nothing she said was going to change Sansa's mind. Sansa Stark could be a very stubborn woman when she wanted to be, and obviously, she and Gendry were now keeping secrets together. Brienne was rather sorry, actually. Although she genuinely liked Gendry, she had always hoped that Arya might return to Westeros someday and mend his broken heart. It was difficult for Brienne to imagine Sansa and Gendry together. Even though they made a stunning pair, she had always thought that Sansa shared a deeper connection with Tyrion, and she had hoped to one day see it come to fruition. But Brienne supposed that just wasn't meant to be.
"Please don't look so disappointed," Sansa said. "I know what I'm doing."
"Well, I wish you would tell me what you're doing. I thought we were friends."
"We are."
"Then, what happened between you and Gendry last night? How did everything change in a single evening?"
"This isn't how I planned things," Sansa replied, "but Gendry and I did a lot of talking last night, and he convinced me that this was for the best."
Brienne's heart thudded hard against her ribs. For some peculiar reason, she felt a pang of genuine sadness for Tyrion. He'd come so close to knowing true happiness, and now, it was gone.
"In that case," Brienne said, forcing the words past the tightness in her throat, "I think you owe it to him to tell him personally, and not in front of the entire hall. He loves you, Sansa. You know that. You owe it to him to do this the right way. Besides, when this is all over, he will still be Hand of the King, and you will still need to deal with him. Even though you are about to marry Gendry Baratheon, Lord Tyrion will continue to be a part of your life, and you need to make sure that you're on good terms when you leave."
Sansa nodded. "Yes, you're right. I will make sure that, whatever happens tonight, Tyrion and I are on good terms when I leave King's Landing."
"I suppose that's all I can ask."
They sat there in awkward silence for a moment, neither one saying a word. It was hard for Brienne to admit, but she was disappointed in Sansa. She had expected better from the Queen in the North, expected her to act more mature and not so childish. But Sansa seemed to be smitten with Gendry, and that was clearly clouding her judgment.
It was Sansa who finally broke the silence. "You know, when I first learned that I was to marry Lord Tyrion, I came to this very spot and cried my eyes out to Margaery Tyrell. I was horrified by the idea of marrying the Imp, and Margaery did everything she could to comfort me. I never expected things to turn out the way they did. I never expected Margaery to die or to find myself caring for Tyrion the way I did. How strange life is sometimes, isn't it? I bet you never expected to find yourself falling in love with Jaime Lannister, did you?"
That was the last thing Brienne had expected Sansa to ask her, and it took her a moment to reply. "No, I can't say that I did."
"How did it happen? When did you know?"
Brienne wasn't quite sure when it had happened. It had started when Jaime had raced to Harrenhal and jumped in that bear pit to save her. At least, something had sparked then. Even though she had still been wary of him, he had risked his own life to save hers, and she had been unable to ignore the goodness in him any longer. But she hadn't actually been in love with him then, just intrigued by his sudden kindness. Friendship had followed, and then love, though the exact moment it had struck her remained a mystery.
"I don't remember exactly how it happened," Brienne answered. "Jaime and I started off as enemies, but then, we became friends. And it was an easy transition from friends to something more. I think it has a great deal to do with trust. Once I learned to trust him, it was very hard not to give him my heart."
"Yes, I think I know what that's like."
For a moment, Brienne thought Sansa was talking about Tyrion, but she couldn't have been because she'd already made up her mind to marry Gendry. Brienne was tempted to question her about it, but she was afraid she'd be disappointed in Sansa's answer. "Love can be a very peculiar thing," Brienne replied. "It often comes when we least expect it."
A wistful, almost sad smile curved Sansa's lips. "Yes, it does."
Brienne shifted uncomfortably in her seat. The idea of Sansa marrying Gendry troubled her, and she was having difficulty keeping her feelings to herself. All she wanted was to return to the Tower of the Hand, tell Jaime what she had learned, and fall back into his arms.
"I think, perhaps, I should be heading back to the keep now," Brienne said. "Jaime is waiting for me."
Sansa's smile widened. "Oh, is he now?"
A warm blush crept into Brienne's cheeks, and she fought the urge to look away. "He is. I told him I would return to him before the feast. He and I have much to discuss."
"And by discuss, you mean . . .?" Sansa didn't finish the thought, but then, she didn't have to. They both knew what she meant.
"I mean, we have a few things to talk about. That's all."
"Of course."
Brienne was used to being teased by Ser Bronn, and even Lord Tyrion, but she was not used to being teased by the Queen in the North. It wasn't often that Brienne saw Sansa's playful side, but when she did, it always surprised her.
"Yes, well," Brienne said, still squirming under Sansa's scrutiny, "if there's nothing else, I will bid you good day, Your Grace."
Sansa stood, giving Brienne leave to rise. Brienne pushed herself up from the wall, intending to head back to the keep, but before she could turn away, Sansa reached out and took both her hands, squeezing them gently.
The gesture caught Brienne completely by surprise. Even though they were friends, Sansa had never been openly affectionate with her, and Brienne didn't know what to think.
"I know that you think what I'm doing is wrong," Sansa said, "but all I can ask is that you trust me. There's so much I want to tell you, but I can't. Not now. Not tonight. You are the truest and most loyal friend I have ever had, and I would never do anything to jeopardize that friendship. You do know that, don't you?"
"Yes, of course I do."
"Then please, be patient with me just a little while longer."
Brienne's eyes narrowed on Sansa. She had no idea why Sansa was acting so strangely. Could her one night with Gendry really have had such a profound effect on her, or was she simply feeling guilty for what she had done to Tyrion? After all, just the day before, she'd practically confessed her love for him, and now, she was about to marry another man.
"Of course I will be patient," Brienne replied. "We are friends, after all. And I would never let a man come between us."
Sansa smiled softly at Brienne, finally letting go of her hands. "Thank you, Brienne. That's all I needed to hear. Now, will you walk me back to the keep? I'd rather not go alone."
"As you wish, Your Grace."
Sansa turned back toward the castle, and Brienne fell into step beside her. Together, they strolled through the garden, taking their time returning to the keep. Brienne had no idea what had come over Sansa. She just hoped that her dearest friend wasn't about to make the biggest mistake of her life.
