29
~ The ride home had been quite. Norma looking out the window at the trees that were still barren from winter and the fact that the village had very little traffic; despite it being noon on a weekday.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Alex asked stopping for the red light.
"There's nothing to talk about." she said coolly. Her gaze fixated away from him. "It seems you've made the choice for me."
"I-" Alex started to argue but the light turned green and he looked both ways before crossing.
It was suddenly more important to him to drive carefully that ever before. Everything he'd ever cared about was in the vehicle with him and it seemed as though dangers were everywhere.
"I didn't mean, we shouldn't talk about it." he said once they were out of the slight traffic and heading towards home.
"You were trying to talk me out of it." Norma said. She leaned her head on a hand and slumped against the window. Her face becoming sad. "Telling me about your dad dying and not to get an abortion." she suddenly looked angry. "It's exactly why I didn't want to tell you." she snapped.
"Norma." he said. "I'm sorry. I was just taken by surprise. That's all."
"I wanted to handle this by myself." she said bitterly.
"Well, I don't want you to do any of this by yourself." he said.
She shifted in her seat.
"You don't want me to have an abortion." she reminded him.
Alex shook his head.
"No. I don't." he said. He was only being honest with himself. "I don't want you to have an abortion. If it's what you want though… I want to be there."
He looked back at her. The short drive to the motel seeming to take forever now.
"Is that honestly what you want? Because if it is, you would have done it by now." he told her. A part of him risking the hellfire of her notorious wrath coming down on him. "You could have left the quarantine for Portland. Gotten an abortion and quarantined back at the house, no trouble. No one would have questioned you. We can schedule an appointment today if you want." he challenged.
He had to press his luck. Press this gut feeling that she wouldn't go through with the thing. Norma loved being a mother. She loved to nurture and care for things too much to ever willingly give up a baby.
She wasn't wrong to worry though. He was worried to. It was scarier to have a baby after the age of forty, even if the mother was as healthy as she was. Then there was the stress she'd been under from the pandemic. Not to mention Norman and everything he'd put her through.
He caught her swallowing hard.
"I just want to go home and take a nap." she told him bitterly. "Those nausea pills they gave me at the ER are making me sleepy."
Alex nodded.
"I'm going to make an appointment with Dr. Gaddis for tomorrow. See if we can't get bloodwork and maybe a sonogram." he said.
"I doubt they do a CVS test here." Norma said bitterly.
"What's that?" Alex asked approaching the wooded area behind the house where they parked their cars.
"Tests for Downs Syndrome." Norma told him aloofly before stepping out of the SUV.
~ "Tomorrow at ten?" Alex asked eagerly.
Norma had already gone upstairs to take a nap and Alex had taken it upon himself to schedule the appointment with Doctor Gaddis. She was the only OBGYN in town after the harsh winter had taken such a toll on the healthcare workers of their community.
"That's great." he said writing it down. "My wife asked about something called a CVS test to?"
"I'm afraid we don't do that here." the receptionist said. "Is the pregnancy high risk for downs?"
Alex wasn't sure what to say.
"My wife told me to ask." he said instead. He honestly didn't know enough and the idea scared him. Anything could go wrong with the baby. Norma could bleed to death, have another miscarriage. Their baby could be horribly disfigured or they could both die.
"I don't know." Alex said again feeling helpless he couldn't help the situation and angry that Norma refused to participate.
"We will have to see what the doctor says." the receptionist told him brightly. "If she recommends one, we will see what can be done."
Alex was slightly reassured. Women knew more about this than he did. This was a woman's world and he felt like a clumsy intruder making this appointment and asking about special tests he had never heard of.
~ Norma heard Alex's heavy footsteps climb to the second floor landing and make no attempt at being subtle. It annoyed her now more than soothed her. She was trying to relax after such a tortuous day. She'd kicked off her shoes and was already in bed with the curtains drawn and the covers over her.
"You asleep already?" came his voice with the door creaking open.
"No." she said bitterly. "I was trying to sleep." she added.
"I made the doctor's appointment." he said and she could hear him closing the door behind him and crossing the room to his side of their bed. The mattress sagging and the sounds of him slipping off his shoes as he made himself comfortable next to her.
"Did they have the CVS test?" she asked stiffening at his touch. She was still angry at how he'd found out. That she'd been in a car accident and gotten hurt and her once beautiful car was smashed and might not ever be repaired. She wanted to be angry at the world, and the world was treating her like something breakable. Or worse, like a monster for not wanting to be pregnant again.
"No." He whispered and she could feel his hands rest over her; trying to pull her body closer.
"Alex, no." she moaned and stiffened so she would stay on her side of the bed. She didn't want to be touched right now. Didn't want anyone to touch her or love her. She didn't deserve it.
She heard him sigh.
"They said they will have to see during your appointment what tests need to be done." he said calmly. "I didn't know what questions to ask."
Norma was quite.
"I'm going to take time off work. So we can go to the appointment together." he told her.
She rolled over to look at him.
"You never take time off work." she accused harshly.
"I did for our wedding." he reminded her. He was casually leaning on one elbow and looking down at her.
Norma rolled over to look away from him again.
"Well, it's boring." she told him. "And… like I said, I'm still not sure what I'm going to do."
He was quite.
"Why didn't you tell me about your dad dying?" she asked suddenly. "Why did you decide to tell me now? You never told me about him till today."
Alex was quite for a while.
"We were never close." he said. His voice sounding different. As though it was difficult for him to talk. "He died in prison. From the virus."
Norma rolled back over to look at her husband in shock.
"Prison?" she asked. She knew very little about Alex and his family. Only that he'd lived in this town his whole life and seemed to be the loneliest man she'd ever met.
Alex nodded.
"Yeah, he… got involved with the wrong people. Got corrupt." Alex raised his brows and tried to smile like it meant nothing to him. "Got caught."
Norma waited for him to go on.
"Was serving fifteen of a life sentence when he died." he explained.
"Did you ever visit him?" Norma asked.
Alex shook his head.
"It must have been hard for you. Being a cop and having everyone know your dad was in prison." she whispered.
"He was the Sheriff here for twenty years." Alex said casually. "They had to drag him out of the same office I use now."
Norma looked at him in amazement. Waiting for him to say he was teasing. He only shook his head.
"My mother died more than twenty years ago. I was an only child. For a long time, I was okay with that, but now I'm not. You-" he bowed his head in her direction. "And this one are the only family I have."
"Alex." she sighed.
"Babies are good, Norma." he said with all the wisdom of someone who'd never stayed up late with a colicky newborn.
"I know babies babies are good." she agreed sadly. "But this isn't an idea time."
"It's never going to be an idea time." he reminded her with a smile.
Norma shook her head. He was right about that. Maybe if they had been younger. If she was a fresh faced teenager and they had met in high school. Had the world open to them and never knew how hard life could be.
"Are you upset because it's mine?" he asked carefully looking away.
Norma furrowed her brows.
"No!" she huffed. "I'd much rather have a child with you than anyone. Just… I just wish things were more peaceful. That's all. I look down the hill and see the police there and the motel guests. Reminds me all the time we're in a pandemic. Dylan's mad at me for marrying you and sending Norman away. I haven't even spoken to Norman yet. I… just. If this pandemic hadn't happened… things would have been better."
Alex looked troubled but thoughtful.
"We might not have gotten together at all." he speculated.
Norma didn't like that idea. She always needed Alex. Always wanted him around even before he'd moved into the motel. Even when she was slightly scared of him. When he'd been so suspicious of her killing Keith Summers, she'd found herself wanting to be near him. To be protected by him. Loved by him.
"No, I think we would have." she whispered.
"I think your right." he said sitting up suddenly in bed.
"About us still being together?" she asked optimistically.
"No, about the stress here. It's no good. I need to make a phone call. See if I can't make some better arrangements." he said getting out of the bed.
"What?" Norma asked sitting up and feeling angry he wasn't going to stay. Normally, it was their custom to argue a little in bed and then cuddle; always ending things with a heated round of foreplay followed by even more fun. But Alex didn't seem interested. Something that annoyed her, because he was always interested.
"Alex!" she demanded seeing him make for the door.
"By the way, the car is at the repair yard we will see if it can be fixed." he told her putting his shoes back on.
"Make that stupid red Jeep pay for it!" Norma spat angrily. The memory of the red Jeep hitting her from behind still made her flush hot with rage.
Alex paused.
"Red Jeep?" he asked. "What red Jeep?"
The one that ran me off the road." Norma waved a hand out. "Hit me from behind and made me go into the ditch."
Alex looked thoughtful.
"You're sure it was a red Jeep? Not just an SUV?" he asked.
"I saw the letters on the hood!" Norma huffed. It was one of those older models. A four door; very red and shinny." she looked at Alex suspiciously. "Why? Do you know who's it is?"
Alex shook his head but she knew he was about to lie to her.
"No. But we'll find the guy. Just take a nap. I've got some errands to run and I'll pick up some take out for us." he said leaning over to kiss her unbruised forehead.
"What?" Norma said feeling hot and annoyed he was leaving her to run errands.
So I know no one likes the (A) word when we're talking about a Normero baby, but it's a conversation people have. Besides, as a feminist, I respect other women's choices even if I don't like them or agree with them.
