Well. I never thought I would ever go back to school. Yet here I am, somehow possessing an A-B average. Wow, this took way less effort than I ever would have expected. Fuck man, I could probably go to a legit college-academy and make bloody stonk if I wanted to.
Well, if you were to have a Gamer's stat spread, your Int would be in the hundreds by now.
Horse fuckin shit.
S: "Wow! You're so smart, Allen!"
Q: "...Dude, I will pay you to do my homework."
A: "...How much are we talkin' 'ere my dude?"
S: "Allen! It's bad to cheat!"
B: "Yes, he needs to l-"
A: "I was gonna make him review it all and make him recite the formulas so it sticks."
Q: "Come on, man! I'll need to cut the price for that!"
A: "Cash is cash my dude."
S: "Oh yeah! I forgot that someone dropped something off for you."
My greed senses are tingling!
A: "What is it?"
S: "It's still next to the door."
After gently opening the door, I yoinked a wrapped up box.
A: "You would think it was a Saint's Day gift with how it's so deco-"
All words escape me.
No way.
I need to find an offering. Gotta burn something up to appease the ROB who sent me this. There's a note attached to it too.
"Dear Allen,
I noticed you were ponderous over getting a device. Being a kind entity, I decided to solve your problems in this area entirely, all for the low, low cost of literally NOTHING!"
-Fondly, Rob.
hope you got over your obsession with chastity. Since you replaced Taiyang... Also, they cant read this."
A: "...ROB. Your transgressions are forgiven..."
S: "So... This is a good thing?"
See. Emyu here was the main computer I used for emulating consoles, hence the name. I also have some of my own roms stored here, but only the finished one. It would be way too fucking much to ask of my friendly neighbourhood ROB to send my Rom on top of Emyu. As such, I simply need to-
...Holy fuck it was modded to connect to the internet here.
Q: "Uh... Dude, why are you crying?"
A: "I feel as though a thousand blessings have been laid upon me..."
S: "So... Is now a good time to mention that we pick our missions today?"
Ah, shit. Well, this just makes it all the better. Hot damn the sexy fuck even brought the charger!
A: "Why wouldn't it be? And if its because I won't have a lot of time to ourselves, I can just pull an all-nighter."
S: "That is incredibly unhealthy."
R: "And for some childish games?"
A: "I have had a deep, scalding, hell-scaring itch within my god damned soul ever since we sent in our applications. I need this or else I will start to go mad."
R: "Define 'mad'."
A: "It would be as if I took Shatter, Euphoria, Amph, AND jet fuel all at once. And had a predatory desire to hunt down and torture anything that moves injected into my brain. This is the reason I came here now. Nothing else"
S: "What is-"
Q: "HOW DO YOU KN-"
A: "The internet is a place where you can learn some fucked up shit, especially when you don't have to worry about the K.I.S. breaking down your door because you're using someone else's device."
S: "..."
Q: "..."
R: "Is this what fear is like?"
A: "ANYWAY, what mission did you choose, Summer?"
She seemed very happy to change subjects.
S: "Oh! We're just scouting out a temple. Nothing too major, but if we sneak in, we might be able to find some treasure!"
Excellent, dear Rose.
