Emily clung to the elevator handle and pushed down the wave of nausea that hit her. She could hear her pulse as she bent forward, lifting a hand to press against her lower stomach.
When the door slid open, it took her a moment to straighten and stagger into her living room, swaying as she made her way to the couch, where she collapsed and curled into the fetal position. Closing her eyes, she took deep breaths and fought to stay conscious. It was sometime later that she heard Steve calling for her and waved an arm over the couch's back.
"Sweetheart? You okay?"
"I made a poor decision."
"Oh?" he asked, appearing at her side and frowning. "Emily?"
"I got a piece of copper shoved in my uterus twenty minutes ago, Steve. I'm in pain."
"Can I do anything?"
"Take me to bed before I end up crawling there, and then get me some coffee and ibuprofen?" Chuckling, he picked her up and made his way to the room, sidestepping her half-packed suitcase. She was sitting up against the headboard, knees up to her chest, when he returned and handed her the mug and pills. Settling beside her, Steve wrapped an arm around her shoulders, and she leaned against him, sipping her coffee.
"I love you." Without a word, Em leaned up and pressed a kiss to the hinge of his jaw. "Ready for tomorrow?"
"If I think about it too much, the combo of stupidity for scheduling this appointment the day before testifying is going to make me vomit."
"I can still take your place."
"The stupidity of you continuing to say that is going to make me vomit." He huffed a laugh and kissed her temple.
"So that'd be a no for me going with you."
"Remember the no antagonizing senators and stay out of prison plan? Let's stick with that."
"What time is the flight?"
"Six. I've got one final prep session with the lawyers at three, so I figured I'd spend the rest of the day grading midterms but right now, I just want to sleep."
"Well then," he said, lifting the mug from her hand and setting it on the bedside table. "Let's sleep."
"Don't you have a meeting at nine?"
"My wife's in pain. And Tony owes me one, so I'm here if you want me."
"Well, then you're not going anywhere. Ouch."
"I'm not going anywhere as soon as I get back from getting you a heating pad."
"Ugh, you are the perfect man."
"Remember that the next time you're mad at me."
OOO
After a quick trip to the Smithsonian to update her paperwork, Emily and Pepper went for dinner, where the Stark security team did their best to keep the paparazzi at bay. But being seen was part of the plan. Since the news of Steve's identity had broken, the PR team had to shake up their media strategy. Rather than doing any interviews before her testimony, they'd canceled everything. With nothing but the pictures of them at exiting their celebratory dinner and the blurry videos of their announcement at the wedding (the hotel staff person had signed an NDA but apparently thought the payout was a good enough risk without taking into account that Tony would easily be able to track it back to them), the news organizations had scoured the internet and their archives for anything of Em and Steve which drove up the anticipation of her appearance in front of the Intelligence Committee. Coming in on the Stark Industries jet with their CEO was bound to draw attention and underscore Emily's importance not only to Steve but to the Avengers as a whole.
The hearing was scheduled for ten. Em spent a sleepless night pacing around the guest bedroom of Tony's DC penthouse, reading through her opening statement that had been released to the press just after they'd landed, and placed a call just before ten o'clock. Her navy blue pencil dress and white blazer hung in the bathroom while she tried to get used to walking in the white Louboutin stilettos Pepper had bought her as a good luck gift.
Carter met them outside with coffee in the morning and had to wipe away her red lipstick kiss on his cheek after she berated him for not staying in New York to keep Steve company. While the Stark team took point on getting them safely through the gathered crowd at Hart Senate Office Building, he provided a comforting presence as she met with her legal counsel and entered the hearing room to the loud clicking of cameras. Em glanced at him and Pepper before sitting in the chair her lawyer pulled out for her and opening her leather portfolio.
The gavel banged, and the room fell silent. Chairman Weir peered at her over his glasses before clearing his throat. "Thank you, Dr. Harthorn, for accepting our Committee's invitation to testify. A few weeks ago, less than ten miles from here, one of our intelligence agencies was attacked by individuals later identified as Captain America and Black Widow of the Avengers. We've asked you here, Dr. Harthorn, to provide insight into Captain America as his former colleague at SHIELD."
As the Chairman droned on, outlining an argument that Steve and Natasha were rogue actors, Emily's hands were clenched under the table. She forced herself to breathe slowly, infinitely aware not only of the eyes on her in the room but also the news cameras trained on her face. As the Minority leader gave her speech on the importance of getting to the bottom of the issue, she forced herself not to reach up and fiddle with her earring backings and satisfied her nervous energy by twisting her wedding ring.
Finally, they asked her to stand and be sworn in. Raising her right hand, she took a deep breath. "Do you swear that the testimony you are about to give before this committee will be the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth so help you, God?"
"I do."
"Thank you. You may be seated and give your opening remarks."
Emily nodded and sat, pulling her portfolio closer and pushing her glasses up her nose. The words of her carefully prepared and vetted statement swam before her eyes, and she blinked. And then, squaring her shoulders, she shut the folder and took a deep breath. "Good morning, and thank you for this opportunity. Last night, my opening remarks were released to the media as agreed upon. Hours were spent preparing them and, while I believe every word of them, I will not be reading them for you this morning in light of what I just heard."
"What are you doing?" the lawyer to her left hissed, but she ignored him. Whispers broke out in the crowd at her back, and the senators exchanged weary glances. She swallowed hard, wondering where Steve got the courage to do this sort of off the cuff speech.
"I have just sworn to be honest, and the first misconception that must be corrected is that I was invited to testify, as I've been informed, is usually the first step towards establishing one of these hearings. In fact, I am compelled to be here this morning. If given a choice, I would never have stepped foot in this room or sat in front of this assembly. I must admit that I never expected this dubious honor, especially not to be presented to me while grabbing marshmallows at the grocery store. So again, I thank you for the subpoena that panicked my husband, who was recovering from stopping yet another attack on the United States."
"But before we get to my husband, who is the actual reason for me being here, I would like the opportunity to introduce myself to you. My name is Dr. Emily Rose Harthorn-Rogers" - she leaned towards the microphone to emphasize her last name - "and I am an Assistant Professor of History at Empire State University in New York City. I was born in Maine and later moved to Massachusetts. I am the proud daughter of a fifth-grade teacher and an attorney, sister to an attorney and pharmacist, and aunt of four wonderful human beings. I am also the proud daughter-in-law of Irish immigrants. My mother-in-law" - Em fought the urge to touch her earrings - "was a nurse in a tuberculosis ward who died helping her patients. My father-in-law was in the Army and died fighting for his country. He received the Purple Heart."
"I graduated with Bachelors degrees in History and Political Science from the University of Massachusetts-Amherst, took some time off, and then moved to North Carolina, where I began studying for my doctorate. It was there that I met the first love." Emily dug her nails into her palm, forcing down the memory of seeing Garrett that night, a cocky grin on his mouth as they flirted. "He was a paratrooper stationed relatively near the campus. Together, we weathered the ups and downs of graduate school and his deployments to the Middle East. We gained many, many friends who supported us as we struggled with his PTSD. Not long after we got engaged, he was sent back overseas where a roadside bomb hit his convoy, and he was presumed dead. I say presumed and will return to that later."
"Dealing with depression and struggling with anxiety, with the support of my friends and family, I somehow finished my doctorate and began flying across the country to apply for jobs. As anyone who has applied to academia will tell you, the job market is small and the competition tough. I thought I'd nailed the presentations, and my CV was strong, but I never heard back. Not from a single interview. With my funding up, I graduated and accepted a postdoc position in my department to give me more time to job hunt."
"It was under these circumstances, not even an hour after I crossed the graduation stage, that I was approached by a man from the Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement, and Logistics Division, more commonly known as SHIELD. Without a long-term plan and intrigued by the information they offered on a topic that spanned a quarter of my dissertation, I moved to New York with only two days' notice. It was there that I met the love of my life - my husband, Captain Steven Rogers, who you know as Captain America."
Em smiled, remembering those frantic few days of packing and getting settled in at SHIELD before he woke up. "Our story isn't the typical love story - eyes meet across the bar, witty banter, etc., that my first love was. No, ours is so much more complicated - boy volunteers for an experimental treatment to fight in World War II, crashes a plane to save the world from nuclear annihilation, and is frozen for sixty-seven years; girl is hired by an intelligence organization to bring him up to speed on the modern world and prepare him to get back in the field. It took weeks for him to trust me and, over the four months I was with SHIELD, we not only fell in love, but I also found out that my first love was still alive. He had been recruited by SHIELD and taken into their ranks after he nearly died. I terminated my contract shortly after discovering this."
"Which brings us to when the public became aware of my husband again. He, along with his team, managed to stop an alien invasion. And between that moment and now, I have watched him go on countless missions to help make this country - this world - a safer place. He has shed his blood, sweat, and tears, spent nights unable to sleep, and nearly died more times than I care to think about. And a few weeks ago we all watched him fa -" - she cleared her throat - "fall from a helicarrier after managing, with help from honorable men and women, to root out a parasite that he had nearly died fighting in World War II. A parasite that had grown inside an organization founded by his first love and friends. The organization that brought us together - SHIELD."
"Now, you may be wondering why I tell you all of this - about me, my family, my loves, and my friends. The answer is two-fold. First, I have a platform to publicly apologize to all of them for lying to them about what I do and who Steve is. Having to do that is one of my biggest regrets. Second, I am a historian who specializes in World War II. As a discipline, our mantra is that, unless you learn from your history, you are doomed to repeat it. Please indulge me as I give you a short lesson." A smile tugged at the corner of her mouth as she let her frustration fade into the background as she tread on firmer ground.
"We are here today because our government - the government you are part of - launched Operation Overcast, later renamed Paperclip, in 1945. Its purpose was to give us a strategic advantage in the Cold War. To accomplish this, we turned a blind eye to the fact that many of the scientists and engineers recruited to our side were part of the Nazi party. And yes, we won the space race and got to the moon first because of the work of Wernher von Braun, but we also imported Hydra. Paperclip brought Armin Zola into this country and put him into the Strategic Scientific Reserve, SHIELD's predecessor. Zola was the right hand of Johann Schmidt, a high ranking Nazi also known as the Red Skull. Let me repeat - we invited Hydra into our intelligence community."
"To be fair, your committee wasn't around to provide oversight at that time. But you are here now. So I ask you, Senators, are you going to hold accountable the organization that we allowed in - that my husband nearly died fighting not once, but many times, that installed a SHIELD director that pulled servicemen and women like my fiance from their families through disgusting recruiting tactics that Nick Fury - for all his flaws - put an end to, and targeted millions of people with the helicarriers that now lay in the Potomac, or are you going to turn a blind eye to all of that history and once again use individuals for their strategic benefit?"
"Are you going to use my husband, Captain America, as a scapegoat for the failures of this government and your subcommittee when all he was doing was exactly what he was trained to do, which was to fight Nazis?" Emily paused and met each senator's gaze. "Thank you."
OOO
Steve leaned forward on the couch and grinned into his hand. He could see Carter's frustrated expression over her shoulder and Pepper tapping away on her phone. The lawyers looked angry and leaned towards her to hiss in her ear.
His phone chirped, and he glanced down to see a text from Sam. So the speech thing is a shared trait?
OOO
The lawyers had coached her on how the hearing would proceed, from the order of the senators would speak to anticipated questions, and even down to making a signal for when she needed a break called to use the restroom.
A few softball questions were thrown her way, asking her to go over how she began her career, why she chose to keep her occupation hidden, whether or not she was required to do so, etc. When asked about her relationship with the other Avengers, her lawyer jumped in and said that it was outside of the purview of her reason for being there. It wasn't until Senator Boynton was given his opportunity to question her that Emily started to feel nauseous again. She had clashed with him a few times in interviews after the Battle of New York, where he'd called for the Avengers to be prosecuted and held financially liable for the damage done to the city. After he spoke for two of his five minutes about the danger the Avengers posed to national and global security, he turned his attention to her.
"It's good to see you again, Dr. Harthorn-Rogers, and I want to say congratulations on your marriage. Can I ask how long you've been married to Captain Rogers?"
"We've been married for about two weeks."
"So it's very recent. Was it a long engagement?"
"No."
"Oh," Boynton said, putting on a mockingly confused expression. "How long?"
"Just a few days."
"Huh. May I ask why you were in such a hurry to get married?"
"There were a few reasons: my husband's wanted to get married for quite a while, and I kept telling him we had to wait, I didn't want to plan a large wedding, and we were in Maine where we could have a small wedding with my family."
"You wanted to wait? So what made you change your mind?"
"Well, we've been together for more than a few months, which is when he initially proposed, and seeing him fall out of the helicarrier made me realize that all of the reasons I wanted to wait didn't make sense anymore."
"So it had nothing to do with the subpoena you received?"
"No," Em smiled. "In fact, quite the opposite. He didn't want to get married after I got it because he didn't want the perception that we only did it because of the subpoena, which I assume is where you're going with this line of questioning. I'm the one who wanted to do it quickly because I wanted our wedding to be for us, one last moment for us to be private people and celebrate our relationship before everyone knew about Steve's life." He studied her for a moment before nodding.
"Do you know of a man named Josef Reinstein?" Emily inhaled sharply, and Boynton grinned.
"Yes, he's my maternal biological grandfather."
"Is he still living?"
"No."
"Do you know how he died?" She forced herself not to glance at her lawyers, who scribbled something on their notepad before sliding it towards her - it was a note telling her to proceed carefully.
"I...I was told that he was killed in a car accident."
"What about the name Abraham Erskine - does that mean anything to you?"
"Yes," Em stated before taking a deep breath. "He's the scientist who created the formula that allowed Steve Rogers to become Captain America."
"The formula, that would be the one you discussed earlier with my colleague. Would it surprise you to hear that Josef Reinstein and Abraham Erskine were the same person?" A murmur went through the crowd, and she looked at her lawyers, who both nodded.
"No."
Chairman Weir had to bang the gavel hard when loud conversation broke out, and Boynton grinned. When order was finally restored, the senator cleared his throat. "Please correct me if I'm wrong, Dr. Harthorn, but if I understand your testimony correctly, Dr. Abraham Erskine is your maternal grandfather?"
Emily bit the inside of her lip and nodded and then cleared his throat when Weir asked her to answer the question aloud. "He is."
"And are you aware of how Dr. Erskine died?"
"I am. He was murdered by Hydra just moments after he administered the formula to Captain Rogers."
"But you just said that he died in a car accident. You are aware that you're under oath, Doctor, right?" Em's face flushed, and she clenched her fists under the table.
"I'm absolutely aware that I'm under oath, Senator, and I resent your attempt to say that I've violated it. Allow me to repeat your line of questioning back to you to ensure that you've heard my answers correctly and disavow you of that notion. You first asked me about how Josef Reinstein died, and I stated that I was told that he died in a car accident, which was what my grandmother said happened. It wasn't until I joined SHIELD that I found out about our connection to Erskine and his murder. So to clarify for you, Senator Boynton, I did not lie about how Josef Reinstein and Abraham Erskine died, nor my relationship with the men. I have answered all the questions posed to me by you and your colleagues to the best of my ability."
"But not entirely truthfully."
"I'm going to have to protest that you're defaming the character of our client," the lawyer to her left said, leaning over to speak into the microphone. The other lawyer leaned over and handed her a handkerchief, and motioned to her nose. Em quickly wiped her face and was unsurprised to see a small bit of blood.
"I need a break," she whispered, holding a hand up to cover her mouth. He nodded.
"We'll ask for it as soon as his time is up. We're going to break for lunch soon, so we can just suggest we go early."
It took a few minutes for things to get back underway, but then Boynton cleared his throat. "Dr. Harthorn, you began your testimony by outlining your reasons for not supporting SHIELD - I'm surprised you left the murder of your grandfather out. Why is that?"
"Because I would have preferred that relationship to stay out of public knowledge. I want my family to be safe, and I've been told quite a few times that having the information out there is dangerous, so I wanted to spare my loved ones."
"And not because you're continuing to cover for your former employer? After all, I've heard that Nick Fury inspired loyalty in his agents right up until the very end."
"Your time is up, Senator Boynton," Weir said.
"Can I respond to that?" Emily asked, leaning forward towards the microphone again. When the chairman nodded, she leveled her gaze on Boynton. "Senator, I have never been a SHIELD agent. I was brought on as a consultant for a special project. As for Fury, I've only met the man a handful of times and didn't particularly enjoy any of those interactions." From behind her, she heard a snort and knew that Carter was probably recalling her flipping the former Director off. The corner of her mouth curled up at the memory, but she fought against the smile.
"SHIELD took my future from me before I even knew it existed. It nearly took my career not once but twice. They've sent my husband on so many missions where, afterward, I've had to sit by his bed and hope that he wakes up. So while I'm thankful that its predecessor rescued my grandfather from a concentration camp, and that they've looked after my family on his behalf, and that I met my husband working with them, I am not loyal to SHIELD. I'm loyal to the handful of people I know who worked for them. But you are trying to paint my husband as a dangerous man, and you couldn't be more wrong. His team and countless real SHIELD agents stepped up the moment they realized Hydra controlled those helicarriers - without them, millions of people would be dead because of Insight. And I think that's what we need to keep in mind, that lives were saved that day because of actions taken by selfless people who threw themselves at a problem without regard for their own safety. To turn it around on those heroes and blame them for the lack of oversight on your part is a disgusting miscarriage of justice."
"We'd like to request a break," one of the lawyers said when Em sat back in her chair and ducked her head to dab the handkerchief under her nose again.
OOO
"You've been watching the testimony of Dr. Harthorn-Rogers, wife of Captain Steve Rogers, also known as Captain America. The Committee has adjourned for lunch and will be back in two hours, and we'll continue to carry the whole thing. Now, I don't know about you all, but I really think Boynton shot himself in the foot with his line of questioning."
"Absolutely, Anderson - "
Steve muted the television and watched as Emily was escorted from the room, Carter and Pepper trailing behind her. She looked composed but pale, and her hand was clenched tightly around her leather portfolio. He grabbed his cell and tried to call her, but it rang a few times before rolling to voicemail. After the third time it happened, he called Carter, who answered on the second ring. "Hello?"
"How is she?"
"Currently, with her head down the toilet. Hang on, let me see if Pepper can pass her the phone." There was a knock and muffled conversation.
"Hello?"
"Hey, Sweetheart. You alright?"
"It's been another day of firsts - never thought I'd throw up in a Senate building." Steve chuckled sadly.
"Well, for what it's worth, I think you did amazing. And the pundits agree."
"I thought my lawyers were going to kill me for going off script."
"They didn't look happy. But can I ask you to do one thing?"
"Depends."
"Try not to look so damn sexy tearing those senators a new one. It makes it hard to focus on what you're saying when you look like that." When Em snorted a laugh, he grinned.
"I'll do what I can. God, I think I sweat off all my deodorant, and I definitely need to touch up my makeup, and - "
"You look beautiful."
"You can't even see me."
"You always look beautiful." She huffed a laugh and was silent for a moment before she said somewhat thickly.
"I wish you were here."
"Me too, Sweetheart. Only a couple more hours until you're home."
"Thank god. But I think I need to get up, and we're supposed to go get lunch somewhere."
"Alright. I love you."
"Je t'aime aussi, mon coeur."
OOO
Carter gently nudged Emily, and she lifted her head from his shoulder where she'd been dozing. The Tower was coming into view, lit up against the New York skyline.
The rest of the hearing had gone relatively well with few fireworks. One or two senators had tried to get a newsworthy sound bite from an exchange with her, but after a stern conversation with the lawyers, she'd toned down her responses. From the limited media she'd looked at while in the car to the airport, it seemed like the highlight of the day was her back and forth with Boynton. A few articles had even linked to their previous news segments.
"You want me to take you up?" Carter asked as he held out a hand to help her from the car when it came to a stop in the underground garage by the elevator.
"No, you should go home. Unless you want to crash with us tonight?"
"As much fun as that sounds, I'm going to head back to my flat."
"Alright. Thank you for coming with me," Em said, wrapping her arms around him. He held her tightly.
"You were brilliant, love. I mean that - you would have made Gran proud." She closed her eyes against the tears gathering in her eyes, so easily able to picture Peggy's grin as her grandson kissed her forehead.
"Love you, Cart."
"Love you too, Em. Now get upstairs - I texted Steve that we were almost here, so I'm sure he's waiting for you."
"I'll see you before you leave for London, right?"
"Absolutely."
"Good. Goodnight."
"Night." With her bag slung on her shoulder, she made her way to the elevator, which opened as she neared. Leaning against the wall, she watched Carter wink at her before sliding back into the car. Tipping her head back against the wall, Emily closed her eyes and took a deep breath, finally letting the stress and anxiety of what she'd done wash over her.
Steve was standing at the kitchen counter, pouring two glasses of wine when she stepped out of the elevator. His grin quickly slipped from his mouth when her bag hit the floor, and she trudged towards him, her heels clicking dully on the floor. "Sweetheart?" he said gently, setting down the bottle and turning towards her. Without a word, Em buried her face in his chest and burst into tears. Startled, Steve held her tightly, pressing kisses to her temple and hair and murmuring, "It's alright, I've got you."
When her sobs turned into sniffles, he pulled away far enough to meet her eyes. "I'm so tired," she sighed, answering his unasked question.
"Okay. Have you eaten?" She shook her head. "Alright. Pizza or Chinese?"
"Pizza."
"JARVIS, mind ordering our usual?" The AI agreed while Steve handed Emily a glass of wine and guided her arms around his neck before ducking to slide his hands down her outer thighs, rucking her dress up slightly. He lifted her, and she wrapped her legs around his waist before retrieving his own glass of wine and walking them into the bedroom, making a beeline for their bathroom where he deposited her on the sink. When he moved away to start running the tub, Em put her hair into a messy bun and smiled when Steve came back to kneel in front of her, taking her ankle in hand. "I like these," he grinned, pulling off her Louboutins and setting them aside before brushing his lips up her calves and standing. As he kissed her neck, he reached behind her and unzipped the dress, sliding the sleeves off her shoulder and down her arms, then unsnapped her bra and flung it away with his shirt. Once he discarded his own jeans and boxers, he pulled her to her feet and pushed the dress and her thong from her hips to puddle at her feet.
Steve set their wine on the rim of the tub and stepped in, settling down with Emily between his legs and tugged her back to lean against him. With a deep sigh, she rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes, saying, "JARVIS, please dim the lights and play my acoustics playlist."
They were quiet for a long time, content to listen to the music and relax in each other's presence. When the second song ended, he took her hand from where it rested on his thigh and lifted it from the water to press a kiss to her palm. "Better?"
"I shouldn't have said anything about Garrett. Not without letting his parents know I was going to do it. It's just, I talked to them last night and told them everything and that… I shouldn't have done that over the phone, but I didn't want to be asked about it during the hearing and have them find out that way. But I think I forced the question with what I said. I should have stuck with the opening remarks they wrote for - "
"They knew, Sweetheart. You did the right thing by talking to them before."
"I need to go see them, try to explain..."
"Alright."
"And they knew about Opa… what if someone hurts my parents, or Tuck or Lauren, or the kids?"
"We've already talked about the security plan for them. And you. What else are you thinking?"
"Things are never going to be the same again, are they?" That made him pause, and he gently turned her to face him.
"No, but we'll get through it." Her breath was hot against his face when she sighed again and then twisted to straddle him, cupping his face. His hands fell to her waist when she leaned in to kiss him lightly.
"Okay," Em whispered, then sniffled. "Okay. Now that… that's done, I'm going to start working on trying to figure out what happened to Bucky."
"Emily - "
"No, I need to do this. You said he didn't know you, and when you bring him home, he deserves to know what was done to him, if he wants to know."
"I can do it."
"My love," she said with a wry smile, "you are not a historian. And I have watched you try for the last few weeks to make headway into… all of that, and it's… well, it's not your forte."
"So you're saying I'm bad at it," he smirked. Em wrinkled her nose, which made him laugh. "What about your book?"
"Let me worry about that. You just worry about finding him."
"Tomorrow," Steve said. "Tonight, my focus is on my wife."
"Good," Emily said, trailing a hand down his chest to slip under the water and wrap around his cock. "Because she needs you."
Author's Note: Back to a long chapter! Boynton is actually a character introduced in the epilogue of Change, where Steve sees Em on the news while in a diner. I wanted to get this all out in one go rather than splitting it up because I'm officially done with the Winter Soldier storyline. I've also decided to continue and wrap up all of Em and Steve's story in this fic rather than splitting off and writing Ulton through Endgame in another fic. Those stories aren't going to take nearly the amount of time that this one did. In fact, the next chapter of this is going to kick off the Age of Ultron!
I hope you all enjoyed this and all of the news that came about Marvel Studios yesterday at the Disney Investor Day presentation. I won't have time to update again before the new year, so happy holidays to you and yours! Stay safe, and thank you for sticking with me so long!
