HAPPY NEW YEAR!
This chapter is dedicated to Black-Inu-1 & Tsuruga Lia1412! I really appreciate everyone's reviews and questions - and thank you all so much for reading and following my stories! I hope y'all have a VERY safe, healthy, and prosperous New Year!
Once again, this really isn't a bashing fic, I promise!
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing from the Naruto universe but I do have an imagination of my own. I will take advice and suggestions from my readers' reviews!
Thinking
Biju, etc. speaking
Biju, etc. thinking
Emphasis
Naruto had no idea how much Kakashi's ninken liked to gossip like old women. Not that I'll say that to them. As long as she kept the snacks coming, they kept talking. Unfortunately, they wouldn't say a lot about their summoner, which was understandable but a bummer - although somewhat unfair. After all, there was little doubt that Gamakichi would totally sell her out, as long as he believed the person was trustworthy. And his little brother, Gamatatsu? He'd probably sell her out to anyone just for candy…
"How's the jerky coming, Naruto-hime, I mean Naru-chan?"
"It should be finished in a few minutes but you'll have to wait a little bit for it to cool down, I think. And thank you Bisuke: I appreciate you calling me what I prefer - although there's no need to use honorifics - as I keep telling all of you." Naruto gave the ninken lying around the kitchen a pointed look and saw several shrugs. At least she had gotten the one she was currently speaking with to finally stop calling her "Bitch-hime." Honestly… She knew Bisuke was always the rudest of the bunch, but this was ridiculous. Pakkun had explained that the term wasn't in any way bad, and she could understand that in a dog's mind that might be the truth. She just didn't like it, plus she couldn't even imagine her embarrassment if they called her that with people or even toads around. She had a strong feeling her summons wouldn't care for the term at all, and would probably even get on her case about her association with ninken. As jealously as the fox guarded her against the toads, she was worried that the toads wouldn't take kindly to another slight. As soon as I finally get them back...
Oddly enough, she could feel Kurama's chakra warm significantly in the ninken's presence. "Oi, Kurama - are you feeling so nice because foxes are canines, too?"
"Who said I'm feeling nice, brat? I am the great Kyuubi no Kitsune! My hatred knows bounds!" Naruto rolled her eyes: he said that crap more than Ero-sennin went on about being the "Great Toad Sage of Mt. Myobuki." All Kurama needed to do was jump up and do a little kabuki jig and they'd be like fraternal twins. Kurama stopped his rant and stared at her accusingly. Oops, did he hear that? I'll be eaten for sure! "I will give you this, gaki: the summons of your perverted intended are far superior to amphibians. I'll say it again: perhaps you should use the summoning jutsu to summon yourself to a more appropriate destination than that dreadful mountain. Doing it without signing a contract first will allow you to…"
"We've been over this before, Kurama. The toads are my partners! I couldn't possibly want or be tied with any others."
"Better to be without one then." Naruto turned up her nose at him, then went back to check on the cake the ninken had begged her for. So damn stubborn! He didn't really mean what he said; she definitely needed a summon, but THEM? No way! Perhaps if I take over her body…
"Are they really wedding cakes?" Pakkun asked with a longing look on his puggy little face, staring into the window to the oven she just closed. When the dogs whined about not being invited to their summoner's wedding, and thus not getting cake, Naruto thought it was cute. Thinking about it more, she became aggravated that she and Kakashi they didn't have cake or any of that wedding stuff at all! So, she decided to make at least this little part of a proper-wedding, herself. Naruto nodded her head at the lead summons, then made a face that made Pakkun doubt her.
"Hai: they're really wedding cakes!" Sort of. One cake she was baking should be pretty tasty for Kakashi if she could just get him to eat something even a little sweet, and the other larger one was for the ninken. No chocolate on either, Naruto thought sadly. Well, she'd never give chocolate to a dog or ninken - summon or not! Everyone knew that chocolate was deadly for dogs: poor babies. Fortunately, Kiba had complained about wanting a cake fit for Akamaru years ago when she was in the back of the Yakiniku. Akamaru had apparently done something Kiba called "especially super awesome," and she overheard a fellow chef-in-training go into the main restaurant to speak to the boy about how he could safely make a cake for his pup. Naruto took notes in the back, hoping to gain back her Inuzuka friend at some point - and she wanted something unique to give her former sensei's summons when they met again. If she had to admit it, back then she was hoping it would somehow win his heart or at least get him to notice her. Kami, I was a stupid kid!
Thinking over the horrible fight that happened between her and Sasuke, she began to feel guilty. It's not like she meant to nearly entirely cut his ear off - she'd only instinctually powered up a wind attack after the idiot refused her hurried explanations and violent punches to make him stop attacking her! How can I make him see, plus make this up to him? If the Bastard was anything at all like he was in her first life, his giant ego and pride would be damaged from getting his ass handed to him… "I'm in the kitchen, and they say the best way to a man - or boy's - heart is through his stomach, ne?" Pakkun agreed and Naruto scratched him behind his ears - which seemed to take his mind off anything and everything. After doing the same with the other seven, (turns out they were a jealous bunch,) she began packing a bento for the Bastard, beginning with a note, which she placed the food on top of. "I'll have to stop by the store, too: we don't have enough tomatoes." Although all the tomatoes in Fire Country probably wouldn't satisfy the Bastard's lust for this disgusting fruit, she thought darkly. "Gods know that they're the only thing that Asexual Ass will probably ever lust for!" She broke out in strange laughter, alarming the ninken.
Shikaku Nara arrived at the Tower just before Kakashi and Asuma were dismissed. He demanded to know who attacked his daughter-figure, making all the men sit back down. He'd just learned from his son that the earrings his brats had been wearing for a while now allowed them to communicate, and although he was impressed, he was more worried.
First off, why the hell wasn't Naru-chan answering his son if they could converse - especially when she'd shown up in front of Shikamaru burned after an attack?! Secondly, a jinchuuriki knowing fuuinjutsu? He was proud as hell of his two kids, but if the council found out about her knowledge? Shikaku felt that it would end up being a real drag. Kushina-chan had been one thing: she was an Uzumaki, too, but she had a good knowledge of sealing when she came to Konoha in the first place. He also knew that rumors had gone around years ago that little Naru-chan wasn't really an Uzumaki at all, but had just been given the name. Whoever outed her status really went the extra distance to make her even more hated with that rumor. And more recently? He'd learned from his son that the Uzumakis and home village were completely wiped out of their textbooks.
"Troublesome. The civilian side of the council is going to be impossible after this. I'm actually surprised we haven't been brought in already for them to complain about Naruto-chan, or to continue to force her into…" Shikaku stopped and grumbled, not even wanting to mention what those bastards wanted from Minato's girl. And ours.
"You're absolutely right about that, Shikaku-kun, and I'm glad you stopped by. Perhaps there are actions we can take immediately to subdue the outrage that will no doubt follow Naruto-chan's actions…" Seeing the glare from the men in front of him, the Hokage rephrased. "...from Naru-chan defending herself." He walked over to the wall, unsealing a compartment that served as a bar, and brought out the hard stuff along with four glasses. "This may take some time," Hiruzen ordered meals to be brought in and the four men began discussing plans to protect Naruto.
"Boss won't like you leaving, Naruto!" Pakkun warned. His summoner's wife just waved his concerns off as they headed into the village. He didn't understand why she henged herself when she was a pretty little thing for a human but didn't ask her about it. She stopped outside the hospital and closed her eyes.
"There!" Naruto said upon opening her eyes. "Hang on, Pakkun, I gotta drop this off for a certain tomato-obsessed asshole." She walked up the side of the building, waited outside a window for a moment, then hopped in.
Kakashi will not be at all happy about this. Not only will he be pissed at her, but also at us for letting her out. This looked to him to be the beginning of an ongoing problem! His summoner's wife didn't seem to pick up on the cues they gave her regarding Kakashi's sometimes domineering personality, only laughing at their warnings. She also didn't respond well to their threats for her to stay home, offering arguments that Kakashi never told her specifically to stay home - which was true - but he knew their summoner better: the brat! Worse still, she asked why she had to listen to Kakashi in the first place outside of work; she even laughed at the idea. They were married, but she didn't get the mating thing at all! As long as I get her home soon everything will work out… She'll learn soon enough. Eventually, the woman giving him grief walked back down from the room she'd been in, no longer holding the bento she'd made for whoever was in there. That was another question she wouldn't answer for him. He groaned.
"On we go!" Naruto pointed ahead, her now long black hair swaying behind her. Pakkun tried to stop her, but would she listen? No!
What are we doing at T&I? Pakkun sneezed, then scratched behind his ear. His eyes went even wider as he watched the former blonde break into the building. She turned to the summon, a big smile on her face, and gestured for him to follow. Boss is going to kill us!
As soon as she was in the building again, Naruto dropped her henge and freed her senses. Absent, rather vacant chakra was easily found in two rooms next to each other upstairs to the South. She hesitantly made her way toward the ROOT guys who had earlier been captured in the Sandaime's office. A large, angry chakra signature appeared in a sunshin. Naruto dropped back to hide herself but sighed in resignation at the man who appeared. "Ibiki-san! How's it going, man? It's been a while, ne?"
Of course, it would be the brat. "Uzumaki," Ibiki groaned. "It sure as hell hasn't been long enough. What the hell are you doing here?" Naruto noticed he sounded exhausted and felt excitement build within her. An exhausted Ibiki meant he would be even more eager to get rid of her, and would probably let her go about her business. She really liked the man who seemed so scary to others - which was just a ridiculous notion to her. The large man folded his arms across his chest and leaned against the wall just in front of her target's room - or cell - whatever…
"Just doing a little investigating, Ibiki-san!" Naruto chirped. Ibiki looked like a headache was increasing: poor man! She leaned into the frustrated looking man and whispered. "I was there in the Sandaime's office when those ROOT members got taken away. I want to see them!"
Ibiki's eyes widened. Minato's holy terror or not, that's out of the question! Knowing the little demon - and by that, he was most certainly not referring to the damn fox - she had to have a reason for wanting to see the two he considered traitors to his Hokage. He slid down the wall a bit and pinched his nose. "Pray tell, brat: why in the world would I allow you to see them? What's your game kid?"
He watched the girl look one way, then the other, looking like an amine version of a really bad detective, before grabbing his arm and literally dragging him into the closest room.
She stuck out her tongue and pointed to it. "I need to get a close look at their seals."
"How the hell do you know about that?!" Great, now the kid's looking at me as if I'm stupid. Ibiki shut the door behind him, thinking about how it made sense that she'd be a little pain in the ass, considering her parents. But the Nara influence had also upped her game and made her even more troublesome. He snickered to himself at the use of the lazy clan's favorite word.
Naruto had already decided upon what she'd say to that question, should she be caught. She couldn't just say, "Sai, the teammate I had in my past life showed and described it to me," so she went with something close to it that would make sense to her favorite T&I person. "I have a new teammate - and I saw that he had a seal on his tongue. Those guys will have it too, ne?" Ibiki's glare meant more questions so she continued. "My new teammate is SO obviously ROOT, Ibiki-san: no personality - well he is kinda weird, so maybe that counts as such - but anyway, he even wears those stupid clothes, ya know? Flat chakra…"
"Alright, Naruto: I get it. But what can you even do about it once you see the seal? We've been trying to do something about those seals for at least five years on and off…"
"Hello-oh! Uzumaki here!" Naruto put up her hand in a silly fashion and waited for him to acknowledge that truth. She may not know the specifics of that silencing seal… So gross: I don't want to touch his slimy Sai tongue! But she felt like she had a good chance of eventually figuring it out so that she could get it off him.
Ibiki pulled the girl into a chair and spoke to her quietly and sincerely. "Indeed. Uzumaki, it's - it's great that you have capabilities with fuuinjutsu… It's your heritage and you deserve to use it, and Kami knows the village needs someone even better than Hatake - someone who's a Master like Jiraiya-sama, but…"
"BUT, I'm the Jinchuuriki, and of course I'll open the seal up or do something crazy to seal up all those who've smited me or whatever. Or I'll let the fox eat them, or maybe…"
"Would you please not joke about that crap, Uzumaki!" Ibiki said in near-defeat. "Thought you were a boy before, by the way." He ignored her calling him rude. He looked out the door and waved her towards him. "Anko just got out of sessions with both these assholes, so they should either be unconscious or dead." He watched as his new and odd little accomplice bounced on her toes at that news as she followed him into the first room, where sure enough, the ROOT guy was very nearly dead to the world. If only she weren't a jinchuuriki: she'd be great in the department. Maybe I can bring her in part-time once she becomes Chunin. He watched as the girl put on gloves she had with her and repeatedly pulled the traitor's tongue out of his mouth as she drew a sketch of the seal. She verified the second prisoner - who was now dead - had an identical seal and bounced up to give him a hug of appreciation. "Idiot," he thought as the corners of his lips unknowingly turned upward.
"I'll let you know, Ibiki-san," Naruto sang. It was only as she left that he noticed her being followed at a distance by Kakashi's ninken.
Strange. "So the little shit finally found his balls and approached her…" More likely, he's having her followed. Great: that meant he'd have to deal with Hatake and all his oddities
"One more stop, Pakkun!" The once again dark-haired former blonde said happily.
Here I was excited about Boss getting married... Boss' wife was Trouble - and she still didn't listen to his warnings about Kakashi finding them! He looked around to make sure his summoner wasn't anywhere near when Naruto picked him up and rubbed his back.
"You're slowing down, Pakkun! I'm sorry buddy, I didn't mean to drag you all over," she cooed at the pug, making him sigh in both embarrassment and in content. The girl's fingers were nearly as magical as Kakashi's. He closed his eyes in bliss as she skipped into the ramen stand. Naruto placed an order for herself and meat for him and his worries went out with the breeze. Or they had - until he heard a sharp-toned voice he was way-too familiar with...
"Pakkun." Oh no. That dark one-eyed glare meant nothing but even more trouble. He let out a whine as the silly, naive little woman holding him waved happily at her husband.
Sasuke Uchiha looked up at his supposed "benefactor" on the Council. He didn't trust Danzo-sama at all and wasn't sure what his entire game was, but Sasuke was not in any way stupid. The guy wanted power, and he planned to use him to get that power.
"Why are you here?"
"Sasuke-sama, word of that wretched girl's attack on you reached me, and I wanted to see if you were alright." His grandfatherly smile was so fake that it made Sasuke want to wretch - if the food he'd finished from that idiot's bento hadn't been so good. He made sure her note was out of the one-eyed man's sight.
"I'm fine. The staff has assured me I'll be out of here in no time," Sasuke said coldly.
"But that's not entirely, true, is it Sasuke-sama? Your ear will continue to need treatment…" the Warhawk began.
"What's your point, Danzo? Why are you really here?"
Danzo seemed to nod his head slightly, but Sasuke could tell that the man was seething, not that he cared. "I simply came to discuss your future wife and her attack upon you."
Sasuke scoffed. "As you've said, I only need her for one thing." That wasn't quite true - in addition to requiring her "special chakra" to ensure the continuation and strength of his clan, he also needed her as his wife to spite Itachi. That Man had been so enamored with her even at a young age, and although they didn't know it, he had heard his parents speaking about a supposed betrothal. Sickening. But if the note she left had accurate information, he felt somewhat unsure after all these years... But only a bit, if that. One way or another, Itachi had killed his family, and he would get him back for it, then he would kill him.
