Will you look at that. Still got some fluff left for you. Enjoy this bit of Gray and Erza bonding.

Wendy threw the old dressings away as Porlyusica examined Gray's skin from every angle. There was noticeable discoloration between the grafted skin and the rest of his back, which was to be expected. They would eventually fade to his normal skin tone more or less within the next year. The severity of the burns pretty much guaranteed permanent scarring to some degree. The less-than-perfect blood flow had been a hindrance to his healing, but after four months, the grafts looked like they were finally fully established. The areas that had been torn last month weren't as smooth, but the skin held. In another year, his back would be as close to normal as they could hope.

His arms were the same. He still felt a painful tightness in his right arm from the tear, but he could pull on a dress shirt by himself now. T-shirts were still a no-go. All the thin scars from when it had used the blade on him, over and over and over, that crisscrossed his body, were mostly faded to white, with some still raised and darkened after all this time. Still visible reminders of one of his most painful encounters with his tormentor, but they no longer stood out as much as they had. Not that he'd ever know. Wendy was sure they would always standout to him. Through constant gesturing and clay molding, his hands have gained more dexterity, and no longer grew stiff like they used to. His chest wound...

Upon removal of the surgical padding a few weeks ago, he had been left with what could delicately be referred to as a large, deep crater in his chest, with just a few layers of blood vessel-rich dermis separating the surface from the muscle underneath. If not for the pain meds, the exposed nerves along the edges of the wound would have been a great hinderance to any movement. The subsequent grafting procedure had resulted in what looked like a thick mesh, strips of skin sliced and laid out in a criss-cross pattern over the cavity, and was meant to grow and eventually cover the rest of the wound. He'd have to keep it dressed until then, which, just as with his back, would take longer than usual because of his damaged circulatory system. It still felt strange, numb and hollow. That sensation would probably never go away.

For the most part, he was no longer required to wear all those dressings other than over his chest wound. With careful preparation, he'd be able to take real baths again, even showers if he was extra careful. He'd have to wear full strength sunblock for the next two years, especially with his, albeit no longer prevalent, stripping habit. He'd also have to adapt to the decreased number of sweat glands along all of his damaged skin, and find alternate ways to keep cool on warmer days.

She relayed all of this information to her patient, who sat there on his ottoman, paying minimal attention. Wendy returned, ready to do the usual sensation check along his back, but paused when she saw the look of concern on Porlyusica's face.

"What's wrong? I know it's been slow, but I thought you'd be happier with the progress so far," asked Porlyusica.

He blinked, becoming alert again. He'd been paying more attention to the sounds coming from his fish pond, than to anything his healers had to say. It was the second week of January now. Lyon had totally called it. His sleep had improved since he'd gotten the pond, and with better rest came a better overall mood. But it was as if this new quality of life came with a toll, and every once in a while, it crept up on him to exact payment.

He'd had a bout of anxiety and edginess shortly after the holidays, that had lasted over a week. He could only thank God he'd still been in a decent mood to make it through his planned evening with Erza, as he'd promised, before that depression had hit him so hard. That had actually been a fun evening, all things considered. So long as she gave plenty of warning before she had to take his hand to guide him anywhere, he could handle her being the only one of his friends there that night. That's how much he trusted her. It didn't hurt that he still had a cordial relationship with his former client, the writer of the musical they had gone to see.

After learning of Gray's unfortunate state, and the bare minimum of the incident that had caused it, he was more than accommodating. Not only had he arranged for them to be allowed in the venue long before the rest of the crowds could enter, but he had provided them access to a private room to relax in while they waited for the crowds to leave afterwards. He'd even introduced them to a few of the main cast of his show, to Erza's delight and Gray's wary amusement.

Erza could only wonder just what kind of job he had done to warrant such favorable treatment from this former client, but that was a story she'd have to get out of him later, as by the time the crowds were gone, he was spent. And other than one small near-panic she'd witnessed him struggle through during one particular song, one that had featured an unfortunate combination of instruments that he'd made an effort to avoid for a while now, he'd gotten through the show relatively fine. All in all, it had been a memorable night.

Gray would later suppose that he should have seen that bout coming. Perhaps he should thank his brain for waiting until after all the festivities were over before being a little shit to him again. It was like a delayed reaction to all the extra stimuli his body wasn't used to experiencing anymore. Too many people, too much noise, too much interactions with his surroundings. He understood that these moods could come out of nowhere, and hit him at any time. Sure was a bitch when it happened, though.

The dull ache that always lived in his head would intensify to near migraine proportions, and his fatigue would keep him inactive, regardless of the amount of sleep he was getting now. In fact, during these attacks, he'd like nothing more than to lay on his couch with nothing but the sounds of water in the background and a "do not disturb" sign on his front door. The only motivation he had to eat during those times was so he could stomach his meds. At first, his team was afraid he'd come down with the flu, but Porlyusica put those fears to rest, only to replace them with the usual worries over his mental well-being. It was so easy to forget about his ongoing struggles when he acted so...normal at times.

So just when they all thought that cycle of depression was over, it looked like he was just given a short breather before it intensified again.

Nervously, Wendy asked, "Did we do something wrong? Were you...?"

"No. I wasn't drifting. Sorry. I'm just tired...always tired. Are we done yet?"

"We just need to check the nerve sensations," answered Porlyusica, "Then you can go lie down... If you wouldn't mind indulging an old woman's curiosity, where do you go when you do drift? Can you recall what it's like? Is it always the same?"

He knitted his brow, trying to think on how to answer. This wasn't something he'd given much thought to. Often times, after coming out of a minor one, he wasn't even aware he'd been drifting until someone told him about it, if they had even noticed it themselves.

"I can't really tell you. I'm not sure where I go. I remember it being cool before... But after I started feeling discomfort from the cold, I noticed the place I go to is pleasantly warm now. It's nice. Sometimes it's hard for me to leave. Is that bad?"

She didn't want to disparage something that he obviously needed, if it gave him a place to go whenever he required some kind of refuge. It was interesting how his mind was actively creating whatever environment he needed most at any given time. But if he was having trouble coming out of them...

"You needn't worry about that. You leave that to me. We're almost done, so you can rest soon. But first...how do you feel about resuming an exercise regimen?"

Wendy looked at her mentor in surprise. This was the last thing she thought she'd bring up. He'd just literally gotten the bandages taken off. He wasn't yet ready for training, was he?

Gray was just as surprised. Sure, he had a wider range of movement now, but he still suffered from phantom pains constantly, and his lack of magic kept him too weak to participate in more than a few walks each day. That's just something he'd had no choice but to adapt to. Not to mention his heart.

But still, to be able to train again?

"It's not too soon?"

"At this point, that's more up to you. If you listen to your body, and don't push yourself too hard, I don't see why I couldn't allow limited, low impact workouts. Some more physical activity would help you in more ways than just getting stronger. I'll make a list of what you may and may not do before I go. I want you to have one of your friends with you at all times, though. And if anything hurts beyond normal muscle pain, or if anything just feels wrong, you will stop and let them know, and they will let me or Wendy know. Agreed?"

He nodded, feeling his mood lift ever so slightly. Wendy was pleased with this new development, as well. They finished the sensation check quickly. His responses were coming more readily now: Although there was some slight numbness throughout, he could at least feel pressure along his entire back again.

She watched him rise steadily, handing him his cane as he stiffly walked pass. It was strange how mental stress could have so many effects on one's physical body. She hoped these new workouts would help loosen him up at least.

Gray shuffled into the dining room, ready for this morning to be over. He zeroed in on the purring sound Joy was giving off. Finding her asleep on his pillow, he cracked a small smile. He sat down, softly petting her to where she didn't stir. 'At least one of us can wake up refreshed. Are you dreaming right now? Somewhere pleasant?... Think I could join you?' he thought enviously.

He laid down on his stomach for now, to apply pressure to the fresh dressings, but also because he'd gotten used to sleeping like that. In a little while, he'd roll over, finally able to sleep on his back again. Joy wasn't even disturbed as he snuggled into his pillow, just giving a yawn and a stretch before settling closer to his face. He'd hoped to sleep the headache away, but that entailed falling asleep in spite of the pain.

Wendy, sensing his discomfort, came in some time later with a cold cloth, placing it over the back of his neck. He was halfway in a doze when he felt the sudden coolness sap some of the fire away. He sighed, flickering his eyes a little, before falling into a deeper sleep. Wendy was pleased with herself. She was getting good at these slower, ordinary ways of comfort and healing.


Laxus was lounging in his seat by the bar, watching the mid morning crowd go about their routine. The old crone had pulled his grandfather aside a while ago to update him on Gray's condition. Hopefully it wouldn't be another set back. He leaned back in his chair to watch each group come and go, focusing on a few conversations here and there. It's not like he was eavesdropping on purpose. It's just that his enhanced hearing couldn't help but to get drawn in on occasion.

There were the usual bragging stories of mission successes, with a few sorrowful tales from the poor saps who'd failed. Max was fussing at Nab again. 'Just get a job as a gate guard somewhere, if all you wanna do is stand around staring at crap,' he thought. It was the group of mages that stood near them that drew his attention, a few of the newer members who'd joined after the war with Alvarez. They were discussing something that happened in the north recently. What the hell was so special about the north, that all the crap seemed to happen there these days?

"They just up and disappeared. Vanished like they were never there. Left all their things behind. And the weirdest thing is that lots of them left food cooking. Bunch of the houses burnt down since no one was there to turn off the stoves. The fire's what got the neighboring villages' attention," said guy who's name he didn't know. Cana's irreverence was rubbing off on him, it seemed.

"That's freakin spooky. You think some demon came along, scared them all off?" asked guy two.

"A demon would have torn up the whole village. Far as I heard, nothing was damaged...Hey. Is it true we got a guy here who survived something like that? I heard he kills demons for a living now," said guy three.

"Oh, right. You're talking about the guild's resident psycho—"

That caught Laxus' ear.

"— I guess you missed it when he had that total freak out a while back. Right here in the guildhall. Guy's a total whack job. Even took a kid hostage. Can't believe her parents still let the guy hang out with her."

"Wait, you mean the blind guy? He's the demon slayer I heard about? What good's a fighter who can't see?"

"That's what I'm saying! And you should see what he hides under his clothes. Looks like he dove into a pile of broken glass. No one knows how he got like that. Probably went nuts and did it to himself. Makes sense, actually. Have you seen his wrists? I heard he tried to off himself more than once. His team probably knows what he did. No way you'll ever get them to talk, though. They're always covering for him."

"I'm gonna shut you up now, if you wanna keep your teeth," said guy one, "Don't ever bring that crap up. Not around him, and especially not around his team. You shouldn't talk about shit you don't understand. If you paid attention, you'd have noticed those marks on his wrist go all the way around. Those are f*cking restraint marks. You weren't here when all that stuff with him went down, so shut up about it. Hell, all the old timers of this guild will put you in your place real quick if they hear you talking about that. And don't ever bring up his past. You're gonna learn real quick that's one of the unspoken rules around here."

Laxus slowly released the righteous fury that had been simmering at all those idiotic words. He had to give guy number one some credit. He'd just saved his boys a world of hurt from "being put in their place". They risked more than losing a few teeth. Still, he wondered if he could convince Mirajane to limit the other two idiots to low paid missions for a while. Just until after their rents were due. Once she heard his reasons, she'd probably do so with a cheerful, if mean, smile. He then snorted at the idea that the newer members referred to his generation as the "old timers".

He felt a tap on his shoulder, turning to find Mira beckoning him towards the old man's office. Lisanna was with her, so she must be in on this meeting as well. That's odd. Usually, when he and Mira were summoned, it had to do with S-Class business.

ooooo

Makarov sat behind his desk, going over what he'd just been told.

"I've given him a very thorough exam. He's healing as expected, though I'm concerned about something else. We haven't been doing enough to address the mental traumas he'd endured. I shoulder some of that blame. I'm so used to using magic to heal the wounded, even I was unprepared for what his symptoms actually pointed towards. From the very beginning, he's been in an almost constant catatonic state."

"How do you mean? I thought being catatonic was similar to being unconscious."

"Such as when he drifts?"

...

"There are different stages, but I'm not an expert of the mind, so I'd been missing the signs, but they were always there. The memory lapses. The depression and self harm. The drifting. The constant fatigue, fear, and agitation he experiences. I'd wager to say he's still being traumatized by his own mind, and the stress and fears are manifesting physically. That's why he's in pain all the time, even though most of his injuries are more or less healed.

"And there is one more thing: The damage to his vocal chords was extremely severe, but they should have mostly healed by now. I'm sure screaming during some of his more frightening episodes haven't helped, but he should have healed at least to the point where he'd have some limited speech. Yet he still can't make a sound, even when he tries. He still screams those silent screams, even in his sleep, so he's not doing it on purpose. Mutism is another sign of catatonia, and his case is what led me to this diagnosis. Something in his mind is causing these symptoms, and none of my treatments can help him."

Porlyusica left him with quite the puzzle. After thinking it over, the one thing that came to mind that could possibly have been so traumatizing as to render Gray in such a state, what would have ruined anyone, including himself, would have had to have been the instrument of his torture.

His own mother.

Just thinking of the sorrow and anguish his child must have endured breaks his heart. He couldn't even bring himself to imagine how he would have reacted if his own mother had been resurrected for the sole purpose of torturing him to death. And his child had been forced to live through it, and possibly even continued to relive it during every idle hour in his waking day, and every sleepless night since then. He couldn't even find respite in his dreams, apparently.

His thoughts were interrupted when his grandson entered his office, followed by Lisanna. Mira arrived soon after with Cana and Levy.

Seeing who was present, it didn't take a genius to figure out why they were here. Cana was the one who spoke their minds.

"Are we finally gonna confront Gray about his mom?"

"That's the reason I brought you all here. Laxus, you're absolutely sure that hair belonged to her?"

"One hundred percent."

"*Sigh* What were your reactions when you found out? And how do you think he'd take it if he learned that we knew?"

"It doesn't matter what we thought. I know for a fact that his walls are gonna go up. He's not ready to confront this. If he was, he would have brought it up himself," said Cana.

"Are you sure about that? We've seen him lose it over some weird shit, but he's usually pulled himself back together afterwards," replied Laxus.

"No, he only looks that way. The incident with Juvia really set him back. His symptoms got worse, not better. He just hides it better now. He goes out of his way to appear normal, but he ends up exhausting himself before too long," said Mirajane.

"Maybe we should tell him about the remains. If he could lay them to rest, maybe he could have some closure," suggested Levy, who had eyed the urn and the drawstring bag every day since she'd come back from Heleborus.

"Or he'll be pissed off that we've been secretly holding onto pieces of his dead mom for all these months," said Cana.

"I think Mira-nee has a point. If what happened with Juvia made him almost have a heart attack, what would happen if we brought this up? And how would we do it? Are we just gonna force him to confront what happened?" asked Lisanna.

"Tsk. If you wanna make the kid drift forever. I think we should bring his team in first. Get their opinions. They know him better than anyone, and he'd have more people around to keep him from losing it," said Laxus.

Makarov considered all of this, and came to a decision.

"I agree with Laxus. Gray's team has been his rock throughout everything that he's been through since the beginning. They need to know what's going on if they are to help him through this trial. Thank you for your counsel. You're free to go."

As they left, Makarov turned his thoughts inwards, still wondering if he's making the right decision. It made the most sense. And if coming to terms with this would help him heal, it's better done sooner rather than later.

"Mavis, help us," he sighed.


"...That's good, nice and slow. Breathe in, circle around, and breathe out as you move forward...repeat once more...you're doing great...keep your arm up...easy...circle around...and breathe...good. Well done. We're finished. Here, drink some more water."

Erza and Gray were in his backyard, taking up a space in the small natural area in the rear, among the trees and shrubs. The small number of young evergreens provided shade in the few instances when the sun shone through the thick clouds, and there was plenty of clear space without rocks and pebbles to trip on.

They had just completed their cool down, a few minutes of Tai Chi to stretch out sore muscles and calm down their, mostly Gray's, racing hearts. Their workout today consisted of a warm up of modified pushups and sit-ups, which were surprisingly difficult with half of one's ab muscles torn up by rune carvings, as they'd found out. They followed that up with some sword exercises, using a set of bokken that Gray kept on hand. Erza was surprised that he hadn't just used ice every time he worked on his swordsmanship before. He replied that sometimes he just liked to workout without the use of magic. He never thought he'd benefit from that foresight so well.

They'd worked on style and technique today, focusing on basic movements in order for Gray to strengthen his arms and back muscles. There was no sparring involved, as one didn't use bokken to spar with anyway. Maybe when Gray got stronger and more confident in his movements, they'd move on to actually crossing swords together. That would certainly help him develop his spatial awareness and reflexes.

She watched as he rubbed at his right shoulder and around the new grafts. Everyone knew he'd have more difficulty using that arm, but he's lived with it for this long, was well aware of his range of motion there, and had grown used to the pain that came with forcing its use. This kind of discomfort he was quite used to, having experienced its type throughout his physical therapy. Porlyusica had assured him that so long as he could still move it, even through the pain, without pulling on the grafts, that continuing to do so would help in the long run. He just saw it as another form of therapy. Erza couldn't agree with allowing Gray to purposely cause himself pain, but she wasn't the medical expert. She may not be his healer, but she was his friend, and she could make sure he didn't push himself too far, at least.

"How do you feel? You don't feel faint, do you? You better not try to hide it this time."

He wiped the sweat off his face with his sleeve before he answered. He looked kind of insulted. "I told you. I didn't hide it last time. It freakin snuck up on me."

Their first training session wasn't nearly as successful as today. Well, perhaps unsuccessful wasn't the right word. They'd definitely learned a lot that first attempt. With Natsu helping, they started out with easy stretches, to get the maximum range of motion they were going to get. Then they started with a simple spar. By simple, that meant letting Gray use Natsu as a practice dummy. Said dummy was only allowed to block and dodge, no punching at all. Gray would need more time to develop his other senses enough to evade and block oncoming attacks himself.

That had been their intention, at least, until Natsu let himself get drawn into the spar, and instinct made him throw a punch. Erza saw it in his stance and how he projected his movements, and knew the attack was coming, a berating already leaving her lips before he even made impact...which never came. Gray had blocked him. And then surprised him with an immediate follow through when he rammed his fist into his solo plexus, forcing him to stagger back.

Both of them looked at Gray in stunned disbelief.

"How'd you do that?!" Natsu yelled.

Breathing hard, he replied, "Why are you so surprised I got one through? I'm surprised you dropped your guard."

"No, he didn't. He threw a punch at you, which you blocked," Erza informed, smiling. "Did you not notice?"

"Still blind. And no, I just reacted. I started visualizing what Natsu was doing, based on where he placed his feet, and where his hands and arms were as he blocked. I guess it was instinct." He then paused, thinking for a moment, before unexpectedly throwing a bruising punch against Natsu's arm. "The Hell were you punching at a blind guy, you idiot?!"

"Ow! Hey! I just reacted, too. And how the Hell can you tell where my feet are?"

"The ground's littered with leaves and twigs, ash-for-brains. They snap and crunch with every step. It's how I know where both of you are when you're not talking."

"Your hearing has improved, I see," observed Erza.

Shaking his head, he informed, "That's just a myth. My other senses don't improve just because one of them stops working. I just focus more on them now."

"Well whatever it is, does that mean we can spar for real?" Natsu asked hopefully.

Erza thought about that, and imposed a stipulation that Natsu would have to hold back his strength, and to avoid certain areas (i.e. the upper right chest, abdomen, and upper back) just in case Gray missed a few attacks.

That was a good call, as after a few minutes of Gray's not-so-bad display, he started flagging, and more punches made contact than not.

He suddenly staggered, catching himself on a surprised Natsu—

"Hey, you alright?!"

—before he passed out.

"I didn't hit him that hard, I swear!" he cried as he gently lowered him to the ground.

"I know. He just fainted. He must have reached his limit for today. We neglected to take his weakened blood flow and magic fatigue into account."

After carrying him inside to a fretting Lyon, he came to after a few minutes, and received a relieved yet exacerbated question about why he hadn't told them he wasn't feeling well.

"I felt fine. At least, I felt no different than usual, which is fine given my current criteria. Besides...I was having fun."

No one could remember the last time he'd said that, so they let it go, with a new rule that workouts would have a shorter duration for now on, with many breaks in between.

Now, they'd gathered their things and headed inside, Erza putting the bokken away as Gray went to shower. Lyon was out on a mission until later in the afternoon, leaving just Erza there with Gray today. Natsu and Lucy had taken their own mission, and wouldn't be back until the next day. No one seemed to notice how much more often she'd been volunteering to stay with him lately, or that she'd been sticking around town more often, allowing Natsu, Lucy, and Happy to go on missions on their own whenever they felt that need for adventure. Though she was just a little disappointed in their lack of attention to such an obvious change in her behavior, she was glad to be able to keep her reasons from them. They deserved to enjoy some peace without dealing with the concerns she kept to herself.

She wondered what they would do until Lyon returned. It was too early for lunch, so maybe they'd walk around town today, or go to the park and try some new O and M exercises Loren had suggested. If he was feeling up to it. She didn't want to put too much pressure to perform upon him. He had a poor tendency of doing things for others needlessly, instead of looking out for his own desires.

As she waited at the dining table, enjoying a quick snack of cake, she noticed Joy peaking at her from her basket. Usually she claimed Gray's pillow like a queen, but she seemed shy around Erza. It wasn't that Gray was possessive over his fur baby and didn't want others to play with her. On the contrary, whenever he was in one of his sociable moods, he was quite generous in passing her around, espousing on how soft her fur was and how super cuddly she could be. She never looked amused when he was like that, but she always put up with it, because she loves her daddy, and he gives the best scritches.

But when he wasn't within sight, she tended to be wary around everyone else but Lyon, and that's only because his smell was everywhere. She eyed Erza as cats do, sizing her up for potential trouble, it seemed. As they had their staring contest, Erza heard the water finally turn off. Gray had recently discovered that the sensation of water running down his back was downright euphoric to him now, and would spend more time than necessary just standing under the spray.

As she waited for him to come out, she gathered the necessary items to redress the new skin grafts on his chest. Because they were recently grafted, they needed to be redressed twice a day. Gray had assured pretty much everyone, multiple times with some people, that he was fine with Erza doing it, and to stop fretting over such a trivial thing as a five minute wound check.

She heard the bathroom door open and the swish of his cane along the floor, so she went to sit on the couch to wait. He entered, wearing just a pair of dark jeans, tossing a fresh shirt over a chair for if they decided to go anywhere later. He towel dried his hair the best he could, and even though his arms still didn't reach as high as they should, he managed.

She eyed the healing wound now, still a distressing thing to see out in the open. It was almost completely covered by the spreading grafts now, though some spots still showed gaps here and there. He sat, putting the towel aside. He showed a relaxed posture, but he couldn't hide the slight trepidation in his eyes. She knew this could be an issue, but she believed he'd come a long way when it came to contact with women. He'd even let Lucy hug him last month. That was incredible progress for him.

"It's okay. I won't hurt you... It... It's just me" she said softly, remembering how theses words seemed to help every time Lucy said them.

He inhaled sharply, before shaking his head, gesturing slowly, so Erza could catch his words more easily, "It's not that, not really. I'm not afraid of you. I can't control how I react...and I don't want to hurt you."

She had to smile at that. As sweet as he was to worry, as strong as he was still, and as unpredictable his reactions could be on any given day, she had no doubt she could stop him from hurting her. She told him as much.

Now he had to smile, though more sadly. "That never crossed my mind. What I meant was, I don't want my rejection to make you sad. You're incredibly strong, and your strength comes from your feelings towards us. You let your emotions drive you, and embrace them so completely. I just don't want..."

He stopped, not sure how to explain himself more clearly, knowing she's still not as knowledgeable in Gesture Speak as Lyon or Lucy, or even Asuka.

But she understood enough, and was happy that he'd consider her feelings like this.

"It's okay. I know how you really feel about us. I won't take offense... Nothing you've said or done has made me ever think any less of you. In fact, my respect for your resilience and perseverance grows every day. You have nothing to worry about. Not from me. Now, why don't we get this finished. You look ready to fall over right now," she said sympathetically.

"*Chuckle* Yeah, well, these workouts definitely get me tired enough to actually fall asleep now."

"I'm glad they're good for that at least."

So they went through the process as Lyon had instructed. He sat ramrod straight, hands gripping his pants on top of his thighs tightly to keep them still, while he tried to keep from trembling. She allowed him to apply the balm over the wound himself, to keep any irritation down. He breathed unsteadily at times, and his breath hitched whenever her hand brushed his skin instead of gauze. When she was done, he had a thin padding of gauze packed into the now much shallower wound, covered with a fresh dressing taped in place. He could finally relax, moving to lie down as Erza got up from the couch.

She looked at him curiously, seeing how he was trying to position himself. "Shouldn't you lie on your back now? With the grafts..."

He paused just long enough to Gesture lazily, "New dressing, pressure helps keep in place," before dropping down on his stomach.

She merely hummed in acknowledgment, putting everything away. She came back to check on him, finding Joy had taken her place on his pillow. She quirked her one ear towards Erza, but kept her head down. No threat there. She was about to pull a blanket over him, when she noticed him fidget, trying to get comfortable.

"Do you need anything? You look really tense."

He waited a bit, before sighing and turning over again, this time all the way to his back. That position was taking a while to get used to. It felt weird, like half his back was asleep. Staring at the ceiling, he kept his hands on his chest, one pressed over the dressing, deciding how much to say. May as well be truthful.

"It's always like this. I could go boneless and still have trouble getting everything to shut down. I'm too sore and too tired to care. I'll drop off eventually," he finished, dropping his hands heavily and closing his eyes.

He must have been too tired to remember how much Erza was able to understand, but she got the gists of that. "Doesn't sound very restful."

He just shrugged. He'd had the same conversation more than once with Lyon, Porlyusica, and even Wendy. The little lady could be kinda bossy when the situation called for it.

She brought one of the dining chairs over and sat, thinking maybe some company and small talk would help him relax. Then she remembered that night months ago, his first night awake, when she'd found herself in a similar situation. She remembered how, after he'd...fallen asleep, that even unconscious he was stressed, his whole body knotted up. That put an idea in her head. But how receptive would he be to it? If he would allow a hug from Lucy, would he be willing to let her...?

"Gray?" She asked softly.

He shifted, letting her know he heard.

Before she could change her mind, she continued, "If you think it would help, and if you want—it's entirely up to you—but if you think you'd be okay with it, I could help you loosen up all those knots in your back?"

After a moment of confusion, he opened one eye, looking towards her voice, gesturing, "You mean like a massage?"

She guessed that last word was what she'd meant, judging by the motions, and she said yes.

He didn't look nervous yet. That was good. She let him think about it, not wanting to push him. But after a minute or two, she started to think she was rushing things with her suggestions when he finally answered.

"You'd do it?"

Lyon's words from that time came back to her.

"Don't worry so much. He knows you won't hurt him. He trusts you more than anyone. He can't control how he reacts to certain people. It's considerate of you, trying to be so accommodating, but if you keep avoiding him like that, you'll only make him feel worse. Just don't catch him by surprise."

She could do this. It's obvious he trusted her, or at least trusted her more than others with this kind of thing.

"Yes. But I could hire someone else if you'd prefer?"

"No! Don't want anyone else here...no one else to see..." he ended, alluding to his scars. She'd thought it was the cold that had kept his shirt on throughout their workout today.

"... You have nothing to be ashamed of. And nothing to fear. So...?

It didn't sound so bad. And if it helped him relax...

He nodded. "Right here?"

Pleased, she answered, "Wherever you're comfortable."

Another pause, and before he could lose his nerve, he stiffly rose to turn over again, placing his arms under the pillow before lying down. Joy looked a little annoyed at being disturbed yet again, and seemed to give a look towards Erza, like it was all her fault.

Now that she could actually study his back, she could see full proof of his need for this. His back had visible knots everywhere. Not surprising, what with the nature of his injuries and constant stress he's been under. No wonder he was having trouble getting comfortable.

She kneeled down beside the couch, wondering how she should proceed. She was a little nervous. She understood that his back was as healed as it would ever get, and that it's discolored appearance was mostly cosmetic. Having seen how it had looked before the grafts, she really couldn't be upset. But she would still try to be gentle, to be just firm enough. Deciding to start at the top and work her way down, she was about to start, but caught herself when she saw him hold back a flinch. Focused on his upper back, she hadn't noticed the cold sweat starting to form elsewhere until now, nor how his brow was knitted. She wondered if he was aware of the slight wetness in his eyes. She felt sorry for him. It looked like the man was doing this more for her than for himself, and was starting to regret the decision, but didn't want to let her down.

Recalling how Lucy had handled similar situations, and how certain words seemed to allow him to focus on the now instead of back then, she used her calmest voice, and quietly repeated, "It's okay. It's just me."

Some words triggered bad memories, and people will avoid them like the plague. But it's good to be aware of positive triggers as well.

He calmed down noticeably, taking in a deep breath before letting it out as he closed his eyes, giving his silent assent to begin. She slowly, tentatively brought her hands to his shoulders. He jerked, eyes opening in shock, but he held his breath and gritted his teeth, reminding himself that it wasn't HER, before slowly exhaling and closing his eyes again. She took that as permission to continue. Using her thumbs, she started out with small circles, massaging the knots as she found them along his upper back. She moved down his spine, always starting at the center, moving methodically outward, finding a rhythm as she alternated using her palms, knuckles, and thumbs again, changing the pressure applied depending on location and severity of the knots.

It was difficult for him at first. Yes, he trusted her, and yes, he had ample warning of what to expect, but it was still a feat of courage and endurance for him to allow such a prolonged and intimate touch. He was wound so tightly, and he knew she could tell, with how hesitant she still seemed. But she kept at it, and slowly, his tension began to lessen. She'd always been very perceptive, and as he gradually relaxed, her movements steadily grew bolder.

He started feeling a tingling sensation within his brain, going down his spine, as he could almost physically feel the endorphins releasing as natural pain killers throughout his body. It felt good, blissful even, and his mind started to wander. His ever present headache slowly dissolved. So did his anxiety. Never thinking he'd ever again be able to relax while alone in a room with just one woman, even one as faithful and as caring as Erza, the sense of relief that came with the realization of his growing ease with her was overwhelming. He was unaware of the trust he was showing as he unconsciously let his guard down. Before either of them noticed, he'd fallen asleep.

Erza was more than aware of how much trust he'd just shown in his willingness to allow such a vulnerability in her presence. She was relieved, and grateful that this idea had been such a good one. She was absolutely going to add massage therapy to his weekly regimen for now on. So much for going out today. Oh well. He obviously needed a nap. As she finally pulled the blanket over him, she watched Joy stretch and yawn, before padding onto the small of Gray's back. She kneaded the material a bit, before dropping herself down, facing her back to her, looking at her over her shoulder with expectation.

"Is it your turn, now?" Erza smiled. Reaching for her missing ear, she rubbed the nub gently, just as she'd seen Gray do, enjoying the purring sound as Joy nudged her head more firmly against Erza's hand. She knew what she wanted and wasn't shy about demanding it. Erza did this for a minute or two, before ending with a few soft pets along the kitten's back. She stretched again before curling into a ball, right where she'd settled on Gray's back. Far be it for Erza to disturb the little princess now.

"Glad to have met with your approval," she whispered.

Rising from the chair, she replaced it at the table, and turned out the lights as she left the dining room, deciding to take her own shower before starting on lunch.

She smiled to herself. They'd made a lot of progress today.


So, he's healing up nicely, the skin grafts are coming out well, he's learned that he can allow women to touch him without completely losing it, and he can finally workout again. Wendy has gained more confidence in her abilities, and Natsu's not too afraid of breaking him again, even willing to spar with him a little. Cheers all around.

I'm a few hours early in updating tonight. How appropriate, that my last update of the year is sort of a transition piece to a different tone for this story. Happy New Year!

Next chapter: Team Natsu discovers something painful, while Gray's feeling out of sorts.