The flat in Saint-Paul was silent and half-empty. Elliott was busy typing that damn email; he had been glued to his computer for more than ten minutes.
That blank page scared him, it seemed to suck him in and Elliott could not help but stare.
He mustn't have high hopes. It was a personal request, yes, not on behalf of the Royal Nature Park, perhaps that was the heart of the stress. In any case, if things were to turn out as he had expected, what he'd get out of it would be useful information, extra general knowledge.
Dear Miss De Villiers,
No, perhaps calling her by surname would ruffle her. She was young...
Elliott could write the email introduction even after, the body of the text was what mattered. It was the simple matter of conducting an interview and, if possible, observe specimens. If Elliott were told no it wouldn't have been the end of the world. Yet his hands were shaking.
Brawny, fat, fair-skinned hands.
Looking at his hands Elliott thought about his best friend and understood that he was definitely an anti-Brent: squishy, blond-ish, short, with a mop of hair that was neither curly or straight, but had a life of its own; a heavy derriere, rounder and higher than most girls'.
He wasn't anyone's aesthetic dream.
And knowing that he was so ugly, so unmanly and unappealing, Elliott realised that the real reason for his fear wasn't the interview.
It was the person he was supposed to interview.
The paleontologist finished to draft his email and, hearing that his best friend had come home, knocked hard on the bathroom door.
-Hey Bre, you back? Can you help me a moment?-
The shower water ran copiously, but the noise wasn't so loud as to justify the lack of response.
-Come on, you ugly stinking goat, wrap it up with the shower. I need you.-
Brent and Elliott were friends from high school and used to call each other charming names, an expression of friendship as old as their friendship itself.
Too late Elliott realised he had disturbed the wrong ugly stinking goat. He stared at the other roommate, standing in the doorway, eyebrows in supreme pissing position and body proudly uncovered by any type of towel or bathrobe.
-Hey, Sev-o ... where's Brent?-
Elliott knew he shouldn't expect an answer; Sev shut the door in his face without batting an eye.
The sense of inadequacy once again hit the poor paleontologist. If he was an anti-Brent, imagine if he wasn't also an anti-Sev.
Elliott would accept help from anyone tonight, but the one roommate around didn't seem particularly well disposed. Elliott was still in the way when Seventeen came out of the bathroom, this time wrapped in a towel.
-...I can't sleep Sev!-
-Then don't.-
That was the last thing Elliott heard him say before he was left alone in the hallway again.
/
The evening was crisp, perhaps that plain linen shirt he had hastily sewn the past week was a little too light.
Brent was shivering: he wanted to show off the stylized vegvisir embroidery on his chest, this was the second date and he wanted to be at his best. His plain shirt was neither too pretentious nor overly elegant for a night out at the pub, but it flattered his tall frame and let the shape of his big pecs show through, even showing some reddish hairs here and there.
They had an appointment there at the pub, she hadn't wanted him to go pick her up.
"God forbid you think I'm your girlfriend!" she had stated curtly.
The first date had been as friends and she demanded that it be the case for the second too. Brent was ok with that, he was in no hurry, he could easily let the girl of his dreams dictate the pace; he wasn't anxious to achieve certain goals, she was worth the wait.
After all, the last time she had been with anyone it was that jackass, Joel.
Brent understood that Lillian was in no hurry to undress for him.
/
-Will you hurry up? Don't keep the poor fella waiting.-
Carly was getting motion sickness from Lillian running from one side of her studio flat to the other. She pretended not to be wired "because it was just Brent", but the way she was obsessively looking for hairpins and for her lucky bra suggested otherwise.
-It's because I always want to be beautiful. For me, not for that guy.-
"Sure ..."
Carly watched her from the sofa, ready for a Saturday of movies and rest. She wanted to enjoy all the peace she could, she had taken a break from studying. Lillian too was on holiday and had gone down to North City in the morning to spend time with her.
Lapis wanted to spend that evening by himself; he and Carly had always done that, some evenings together, others alone.
-Anyway, in three days it's New Year's Eve. You and Brent could come with us to see the fireworks.-
-Where?-
-Down here.-
There was a reason why Lillian was nervous. And yes, in a way it was about Brent. She and Carly had already discussed the subject, but now there were positions to rethink.
-I'm thinking of starting with the pill…-
Carly was genuinely surprised. What happened to not wanting synthetic hormones in her system?
-So you have plans for Brent …- she giggled mischievously, rolling up a lock of hair so long that her finger got entangled.
Lillian was grateful for that little oversight that killed some tension.
-No, I'm doing it for me! A year ago...you don't know what real terror is until you spend weeks waiting for your period to come, and then when it comes, you thank God…-
Lillian wanted it not to happen again.
-A year ago you risked a pregnancy and you haven't even told me?-
Carly was a little upset, however it would have ended there if Lillian hadn't retorted,
-Er, you don't wanna know.-
Carly let out a gasp of shock, her pretty lips drawing a circle; the former top ranger began to worry when she saw her jump off the sofa and aim for her, with a threatening grimace.
Lillian bit her tongue: she always blabbered, she talked too much. Was there really any need for her to give Carly that kind of detail? Had she expected her best friend would not understand?
Lillian looked at her, now quite far from her usual being angry-but-adorable: shewas pissed, ready to give her a beating.
Lillian backed away cautiously, -Carly, Carly, no, wait, wasn't it water under the bridge?-
-YOU IMBECILE...HOW COULD YOU!-
Carly was now running after her.
-Don't you blame only me! Ahhh!-
Ready or not, Brent was waiting for her. And there was no better time to jump out the door and safely into the car, before that hellcat put her cute hands on her.
/
-May I?-
-No.-
The paleontologist ignored the answer and let himself in Seventeen's room; he was sick of seething alone in front of that email. Elliott found the top ranger lying flat on his bed, lights off, TV on, surrounded by several chocolate bars and bags of popcorn .
-If you're here for my Kit Kat, leave now.-
-Hahaha! I'm fat, you have Kit Kat bars, so funny…-
Elliott temporised, staring absently at the TV. Frames of bloody zombies running around in the night amused him. -I Am Legend. Sweet.-
Elliott was about to reveal to Seventeen why he had disturbed him when the latter interrupted him.
Seventeen opened the text message he had just received, a hand raised to invite Elliott to wait.
We need to talk.
Words so hermetic to unsettle him.
-What's up?-
Elliott sat noisily on his roommate's bed, earning a puzzled look.
-It's Carly.-
Elliott watched Seventeen shake his head as he typed his answer:
Tomorrow. Can you wait for tomorrow?
It looked like Carly was mad. Her sudden answer cleared up doubts about her state of mind:
Do you have company by any chance? At least ask her if she's on the pill before proceeding.
Elliott, who was peeking, nearly had a heart attack, -Er, Sev...what did you do?-
Seventeen didn't even listen to Elliott, a helpless rage built up inside of him. Was Carly accusing him of cheating on her?
"What the fuck..."
He called Carly, but the line rang empty.
Standing in the dark corridor Seventeen looked furious, absolutely unapproachable. He didn't care that Elliott was listening, he didn't give Carly time to retort:
"What does that mean ... What the fuck are you saying! You can say anything about me, but accusing me of cheating on you? You're out of your mind. "
When Seventeen changed rooms, Elliott felt troubled by that turmoil.
"Holy shit, he's in trouble. Yet he didn't seem that kind of guy...did he really cheat on Carly? "
He looked at the Kit Kat stash; if he had pocketed one, Seventeen wouldn't have noticed. Dark chocolate, so scrumptious...
But the young roommate came back without Elliott noticing. He didn't think he'd ever see Seventeen so upset, he was almost afraid he would go and take it out on him. It was too late to put down the Kit Kat.
-Look, you seem like a nice guy, but get things clear with her, it's unfair that she thinks badly of you. Speaking of girls ... please, Sev, can you tell me if this is okay? I have to send it to a girl ... -
Seventeen was bitter and disappointed, feelings he wasn't used to. He had his flaws, but cheating on his girlfriend was something that had never crossed his mind.
When Carly had told him she didn't consider cheating the misunderstanding with Lillian Seventeen had felt so relieved, it had been almost surreal.
There were two options, either to gut the whole building or to seek a distraction; delighted with his unusual self-control, the cyborg quickly read the email draft on Elliott's cell phone.
He knew his emotional intelligence wasn't particularly developed, but what Elliott had written didn't sound like a romantic request.
-You're contacting this person for business, why do you need me?-
-Because the person I'm writing to is basically your equivalent in the MIR,...-
-I have no hell is the MIR?-
The confused and anxious way in which Elliott told the facts was irritating him.
Between Carly and Elliott, Seventeen had had to put I Am Legend on hold at the very scene that gave him the most anxiety, the death of Sam the dog.
-The Monster Island Rangers. Sure, Defiance is not quite like you because you are virtually a machine, but I can't introduce myself badly: she's the daughter of Charles De Villiers, the Major. Those people are not pleb like us.-
"Don't call me a plebby."
Did the concept of social class still exist in the 21st century? Seventeen ignored the unconscious comparison that had just come out of his roommate's mouth, while Elliott kept talking:
-This one's a very smart, very hot girl: in short, if she agreed to be interviewed it would be huge for me.-
-And what can I do for you?-
If Elliott wanted to meet someone to talk about paleontology, he could do it himself.
-Because you're the only mate I have who has a girlfriend…-
Seventeen looked at him haughtily, -I've already read everything. Text body's too long, if you want an interview just ask her for the interview. And now give that Kit Kat back to me.-
"How the hell does he know? "
Elliott parted from the dark chocolate bar, edited the email, and finally hit send.
Since Seventeen didn't send him away, Elliott sat down and focused on I Am Legend, until sleep overcame him.
When he woke up it was almost 1 in the morning; he found Seventeen still watching movies. He was not through with his snacks yet.
-Well...aren't you going to bed? Are you sure all those calories before sleeping are good for you?-
Fat Elliott talking to him about calories, how sweet.
-I do what I please. And your cell was ringing.-
Without doing it on purpose, Seventeen had seen the preview of an email.
The Major's daughter had agreed to be interviewed.
/
Elliott's first reaction, once he got off the plane, was to shield his eyes from a very violent light. It was not a spotlight in his face, it was not even a dazzling reflection. It was simply the Southern sun.
Miss De Villiers had told him to land on Amenbo Island instead of South City, the way to Monster Island would be shorter from there.
During the flight, the elderly lady sitting by the window had told Elliott that if one has lived all their life in a gloomy place, the Southern light could be blinding.
Elliott had not grown up among the shadows but in the altitude of his mountains, where there was no shortage of sunshine and the sun was strong and close: yet that light shining above the other end of the world was something never seen before. Colours were clearer, as if stripped of a filter, so pure that they hurt.
-We are only in December, there is not so much light now…-, the same lady chuckled, walking with Elliott towards the airport exit.
Defiance De Villiers had told him she would pick him up herself to avoid wasting time. Before taking off from North City, the paleontologist had sent her his best photo, the official one from his resume.
"This is what I look like," he had written to her, embarrassed.
Elliott waited near the kerb, eyes ready to spot a black SUV sporting the SANP insignia. When he saw it, Elliott reached out to signal Miss De Villiers to wait for him; he would walk to her. His gestures were interrupted by the opening of a door, and the first thing Elliott saw were her legs.
Tapering legs, strong and sleek, and most of all naked: the paleontologist's gaze went up to the military green shorts, up to a tank top with the initials MIR, up and up to facial features drawn by a masterful brush. A face worth of a movie star.
Finally, poor Elliott's gaze followed the movements of a dark brown mane, blowing free in the warm wind.
The amazing apparition who had left the man gaping like a dead fish was now approaching; Defiance smiled, amused and almost modest at seeing another man-fish merging, -Mr. Gontier?-
Elliott knew the head MIR's face from pictures; he knew she was beautiful, really beautiful but up close, in real life, she blew him away. Elliott couldn't even think about what he was going to tell Brent. That one was a Valkyrie, very tall, majestic, it was impossible not to look at her. In some ways, perhaps because of her bearing and chiselled facial features she reminded him of the diaphanous blonde who had come to Saint-Paul a year before, even though this one was a brunette. Elliott struggled to imagine anyone more beautiful than Defiance De Villiers was; that blonde, in fact, was perhaps the only one who could compete with her..
Elliott was bewitched.
Now she was smiling at him: damn, was she really smiling at him?
"Brunette Valkyrie all the way, over and out."
Elliott was still waiting for a disgusted grimace to appear on that flawless face. Defiance, on the other hand, was waiting for her guest to stop gaping:
-Sir, let's go! I left work to pick you up but I don't have the whole day. Come with me to the car.-
Elliott wanted to have a conversation with her, he wanted to be polite, he wanted to tell her that he was only thirty-two and therefore he was no "Sir". But all his brain could process was a frivolous and useless question: trying not to let his eye fall on the seat belt, resting on Miss De Villiers's bosom, Elliott stared back at her legs and noticed the position of her seat:
-Er, Defiance, how tall are you?-
-183 cm; how was your flight?-
Defiance became aware of the tension that tormented that man coming from afar.
-Relax, Mr. Gontier, I don't want to have you for breakfast,- she pointed to the quaint town with cobblestone roads they were passing through. -This is the Sienna Bay, the port is around the corner, we'll take the ferry soon.-
-Will I...be able to see any specimens today?-
-Of course. We have mega-rexes and pteranodraxes.-
/
Elliott watched the trail of foamy water drawn by the ferry across that piece of ocean. They had parked the SUV in the hold and climbed onto the deck to enjoy the scenery. The bay formed a crescent, it looked like a postcard. Elliott was grateful that the great presence of all that nature distracted him from Defiance's. The ferry passed by a gigantic tower of dark rock, around which the waters were more agitated.
-What is that?-
Defiance basked in the sunlight, sitting on the railing of the deck,
-It's Cape Moor. Do you know why there are always high waves there? I won't bore you with physics, but in a nutshell, just below the surface of the sea lies a very deep canyon, which does not break the waves coming from the open ocean, on the contrary, it favours their height.-
She assured Elliott that a couple of days in the South would be enough to understand how frightening the power of the water element could be.
Later, when the ferry touched the sacred shores of Monster Island, the excitement gave Elliott goosebumps. That was a part of the world that was still brimming with archaic life, it was unbelievable. Just like the girl who ran it, no photograph could prepare for the real-life version.
Elliott slung his go-pro over his shoulder and followed Defiance into the jungle aboard the SUV, in search of dinosaurs. It didn't take them long to brake before a large three-fingered footprint.
-What do you say, Miss? For me it's a mega-rex.-
They both left the vehicle to look at the print. Elliott filmed and photographed, Defiance explained to his camera how the MI division had acquired those dinosaurs.
-Am I wrong or is that a pteranodrax nest?- Elliott stated, looking up at a distant hill beyond the treetops. -Shall we go and see?-
Climbing and huffing along the path that the MIR regularly walked to check out pteranodraxes, Elliott and Defiance crossed paths with other rangers. Unlike in the RNP, the MIR were mostly men. Elliott wondered if it was difficult for Defiance to be their leader, as a woman that young rarely commanded a handful of veterans.
-Can I help?-
He attempted to grab the rucksack from Defiance's shoulders, dominated by a heavy contraption resembling a large harpoon gun. She dodged, used to climbing there alone,
-If you wonder why I brought the hook launcher with me...I hope I won't need to show.-
Hearing a distant rumble, Elliott felt drowsy with excitement.
From up there one could see the sea and the paleontologist's gaze was caught by a large white ship facing another, the echo that could be heard so far must have been cannons.
The white ship bore the effigy of the South City Coast Guard, on its large flag a white star stood out.
His heart raced. He couldn't believe it ...
Defiance enjoyed watching him turn into dead fish a second time:
-As I said to John Dubochet, Monster Island never rests, raiders attack day and night. The white ship is the commander's White Star.-
-We can meet her, right?-
His gaze shone like that of a child in a candy store. He was in the company of Defiance De Villiers, seeing with his own eyes the cruiser of Malina Klintsov-Samuels in action.
His life had never been that exciting.
He even forgot the dinosaur nest they had arrived at.
Go-pro always in action, Elliott squatted behind a rock:
-Here, you see how big she is? If mama pteranodrax stood up, she'd be as tall as a giraffe. Let's see if we can get closer…-
Defiance wanted to hold Mr. Gontier back; she thought it would be stupid to get even closer to the nest to film the creature from another angle. Instinctively, she touched the solid climbing rope harness she had strapped to her waist, and all the snap-hooks she had attached to it.
Defiance had experience with dinosaurs, she knew Elliott had to get away before the creature, brooding its eggs, noticed him.
The sound of a twig trodden by the heavy foot of the Northerner was enough to prompt the pteranodrax to attack: with a stride that completely erased the distance covered by Elliott with a sudden run, the animal grabbed him with its mighty feet and hovered in the air, set to dart away.
-No!-
Defiance had to act fast. She knew exactly which protocol to follow, but it would be her first time.
"Excuse me, mother pteranodrax."
The grappling hook shot through the air and hooked onto a scale of the animal's tail. The long rope zigzagged and stretched as the dinosaur moved away, Defiance made sure all the snap-hooks were in the right place and braced for the whiplash, clutching the rope in her hands and hunching her back.
When the length of the rope ran out and the girl was yanked up into the air, the force of the pull squeezed her lungs and made her arch backwards.
-Ahhh! It's a monster!- shouted Elliott, feeling sure the pteranodrax would drop him at any moment.
Meanwhile, attached to the dinosaur like a spy on a helicopter ladder, Defiance grabbed her walkie-talkie and yelled into the wind:
"Code red. Pteranodrax airborne with a civilian. Force its trajectory towards the lagoon. "
Meanwhile, from the ground, all the rangers and tourists on the island had looked up to the sky, caught by that unusual sight.
-The king of the sky, ladies and gentlemen, the pteranodrax,- a tour guide announced, sharpening his eyes at hearing a scream muffled with the distance. -And our Defiance.-
Another park ranger rounded up the troops; together, the MIR set up some kind of large-calibre weapon on trestles and soon both Defiance and Elliott saw myriads of darts sticking into the dinosaur's body, just as the beast flew over a lagoon.
-Calm down!- Defiance yelled, trying to swing towards the animal's feet.
-We're going' to crash!- Elliott whimpered, absolutely unable to move.
The tranquilizers acted quickly and soon the pteranodrax lost altitude. With an extraordinary lucky strike, Elliott fell like a stone into some kind of pond as the dinosaur landed on a nearby boulder and fell asleep.
The impact with the water hurt like hell: Elliot had fallen from above and had met the shallow gravel bed of the body of water. But other than cuts and bruises, he was in good health. He remembered that he hadn't been the dinosaur's only passenger:
-Miss De Villiers?!-
The lagoon lay in a depression in the ground and Elliott was unable to climb the ring of rock that surrounded it.
"There, she's dead. She crashed. And it's all my fault… "
He saw a helicopter pass overhead and heard many sirens approaching.
Soon he saw a ladder unrolling from the top of the cliff. A silver-haired man leaned over to make sure Elliott wasn't already a broken corpse:
-Are you all right down there?-
/
Defiance was alive and well. She hadn't managed to undo all the snap-hooks in time and had gotten entangled in the foliage of the jungle surrounding the lagoon. The grappling hook was still attached to the dinosaur.
When Elliott and the man who had rescued him came, they saw that other rangers were untying their chief from her tangle of leaves and ropes. Elliott saw her walk normally and look at her bruised hands. He wanted to run to her and hug her, relieved to see she was fine.
-You're alive!-
Elliott could not hold back his relief: to hell with the polite turn of phrases he had hitherto employed.
"She attached herself to a flying dinosaur, crashed and is still standing. Wow. That's Sev-ish. "
-Next time listen to her and don't get too close to a pteranodrax,- the silver-haired MIR admonished him. -She risked her neck for you.-
Defiance herself wasn't mad at Elliott. Sitting in the back seat of the medical car she watched the nurse treat her hands.
Maybe she had to invest in a pair of gloves: clenching the rope with her bare hands, and so hard, had hurt.
Both victims of the accident were treated and immediately discharged: fortunately, their injuries were superficial.
-Why didn't you force the dinosaur to land in the forest?-
Elliott didn't realise he was really associating Defiance with Seventeen. By transitive property perhaps, he thought that she too could be capable of anything.
However, the top MIR looked at him as if he said nonsense.
-'Forced the dinosaur to land?' I don't know if you realise the strength of those beasts, Mr. Gontier. It is humanly impossible to overwhelm a dinosaur. I should be kind of a machine.-
As the day drew to a close, the plebeian Northerner and the noble Southerner walked towards her bungalow.
Defiance was different from what Elliott had pictured after the brief email exchange. He had expected a more authoritarian personality, a more martial way of doing things. Instead she was much more approachable than Lillian, she seemed as comfortable with him as he was with her.
The MI division was also different from the rest of the SANP and the RNP: inside there were no towns and villages apart from the tourist lodges and the accommodation of the MIRs and other staff: whoever was stationed there lived alone.
-Our families don't live here with us, mine is in South City for instance. Some of us have relatives on other islands in the district. Monster Island is dangerous for those who are not trained.-
Evening was coming down. Elliott watched other coastlines light up, where the homes of the MIR families were to be.
The go-pro was miraculously intact, it was still filming.
-Defiance, you're the chief ranger, but how did you end up here? Tell me about your career.-
-For me it all started as a child, when my mother bought this land to restore it: Monster Island already existed many years ago, but it had fallen into disuse and she was keen to restore it to its former glory. I have always been intrigued by this place, I used to come here with my parents, but before working here I served two years in the Royal Navy, with my father.-
-Let's remind them how old you are, Defiance,- Elliott interrupted, full of admiration.
-In January I will be twenty-three. I served from my eighteenth to my twentieth birthday, then I realised I wanted to do more. In the meantime, my mother and commander Klintsov-Samuels decreed that the island was a particularly popular target for raiders, so the MIR were born. We are former soldiers.-
Defiance was born with a heart defect for which doctors had given her a few weeks to live, despite having been successfully operated on shortly after birth.
-I always felt that I had something to prove, that I could leave my footprint on the world even with this handicap. I can't try as hard as I would like, but I'm doing anything,- smiled the young woman.
Then she turned serious and reached out a hand to the go-pro, still installed on Elliott's shoulder.
-You didn't film this too, did you?-
-Of course I did, it's part of your story.-
Elliott asked her how she and her co-workers managed a territory so large and full of creatures that could also be dangerous.
-Everything you see and hear is military discipline.-
Defiance conducted her interview with a smile, but deep down she was frustrated: during the dino situation there had been no time to coordinate a proper rescue:
-What happened today, with you being left in the lagoon, was extremely risky; we didn't have time to set up a net, the beast was too fast and too powerful. I hope you'll excuse us, Elliott.-
Elliott was touched by those words; the MIR had done everything humanly possible, counting the lack of time and also the fact that everything had happened because of him. If he hadn't approached the dinosaur, as she had told him, no one would have been in trouble.
-I'm the one who must apologise. I'm out of place, I'm in the way of you rangers. Well then, we'll continue the interview tomorrow before I catch my plane, for today we have had enough. Thank you so much for everything.-
He knew he had to go, but he felt disappointed to have to take the ferry back to the hotel. There was still something he wanted to do, and he lacked courage. It was something that scared him even more than a crash aboard a flying monster. Elliott already knew he was hopelessly attracted to her, but how could he, a measly 5 hope to get anywhere near a solid 10?
And beauty was the bare minimum, he had even shown her to be a wimp.
Yet, Elliott did not take a step further from the threshold of that bungalow at the heart of the MIR quarters:
-Defiance ... would you-…-
-Yes, sure. Let's go to the bar on the square, it will be full of tourists but it doesn't matter.-
/
Sitting at the bar, Elliott and Defiance laughed at each other, telling anecdotes.
-How did you know I wanted to have a drink with you? And why did you accept?-
he yelled, trying to be heard over the loud music.
-Well, we both need some entertainment; today and tomorrow we work together, it's fine.-
Tension was starting to hit the paleontologist again. Gazing up close at the delightful caramel of her skin, at the reflection of the lights in her gypsy eyes was already an enormous privilege; he had to be realistic, girls like Defiance didn't belong with boys like him.
"Do you think she's gonna give it to me?" Brent had said about Seventeen's sister. And Brent was already a hard 7 or even an 8, virtually a god.
The sight of a bowl of olives and a bunch of toothpicks put Elliott out of his misery: he pierced through the olives with the sharp sticks, forming a fairly regular cube.
-What you up to?- Defiance rested her chin on the counter, giving herself a better angle to glance at the 3D sculpture.
-I'm showing you my superpower. What's yours?-
Everyone had a secret talent: Brent could cook, Carly was practically a sniper, Lillian was a former Olympic champion. And Seventeen was...Seventeen.
Defiance accepted the challenge and ordered the bartender to serve her a pint of her favourite red beer.
When she had the glass in her hands, the ranger girl fiddled with her watch and got ready to start the stopwatch.
-This is mine, watch and learn. Press here.-
As soon as Elliott's finger started the stopwatch, Defiance started chugging her pint. She drank nonchalantly, without dribbling, lifting her little finger as if she were sipping tea from a cup. She set the empty glass on the counter with a sigh and began to cough. Elliott placed his hand thoughtfully on her back:
-Don't choke now!-
He just hoped she didn't ask him to get up until the manifestation aroused by that brief contact had flattened out. The stopwatch showed the number 3.04 in clear figures. THREE SECONDS.
"Ok, she's definitely Sev-ish."
He looked at her, amused -Is this your superpower?-
-It's not much, but do you know anyone else who can do what I did in three seconds?- she crossed her arms across her chest, smiling contentedly.
-Er… my roommate can, but he's nowhere as classy as you are.-
-Obviously. Wait, are you telling me I drink like a man?-
Here, he knew. He had offended her. Now Defiance would be gone, waving the pretty pockets on her rear, and she wouldn't want to have anything to do with him anymore. But Defiance didn't move, she smoothed her hair and fumbled to tie it into a braid.
-Relax! You can tell me, because it's true!-
/
Ronan couldn't decide whether to give the present to his Kate on New Year's Eve or now. He sat on the bed in their hotel room, turning the box over in his hands while she was in the shower.
But he couldn't wait any longer, even for a few more days. He was bursting with the desire to give her that gift, but he was also very afraid that she would not accept it.
Kate was a very pragmatic woman, at first sight she seemed unapproachable; however, she had a heart of gold. Ronan was afraid not of her, but of his own disappointment.
He heard her come out of the shower and sit on the bed, -I'm done, Ron. Sorry for taking so long.-
Ronan turned to look at her as she combed her damp hair, so black it looked blue. Love overcame him when she smiled at him.
Kate was happy. Really happy.
And seeing that happiness on her face undid him completely.
Without saying anything, Ronan went down on one knee; took her hand.
-Ron?-
In his other hand, Ronan held a red velvet box. In the middle was a delicate gold and aquamarine ring.
-Kathryn Alix Lang, will you marry me?-
Kate was completely blown away. She was moved by her companion's gesture, but she didn't know what to say.
-Oh Ronnie ... thank you.-
Thank you.
Thank you?
Kate had foreseen that her lack of response might have offended Ronan, but she didn't know how to tell him what she really thought.
And she was saddened to see him withdraw the box, snap it close, get up and walk towards the window.
-...I'm sorry, Ronan.-
-We've been together for a year. We both know what we want, we're no longer kids playing hide and seek. We love each other. Why can't you give me an answer?-
-Ronan, we're not even living together…-
Kate didn't want to dig deep into the reasons that made her lean toward no. However, she knew she owed her sweet, dear Ronan her complete honesty.
-...I don't want to screw it up. We're happy the way we are, without getting caught in marriage. Marriages separate people, they don't unite them. My mother, two marriages gone wrong. One of my sisters divorced after nine months. I don't want this for us.-
Tears stormed Kate's field of vision as she recalled those painful memories.
-Yet you didn't tell this to your daughter. When she got married you didn't tell her that she had ruined her life. Why are you saying this to me instead? Why do you think we will fail?-
Kate clenched her fists and pounded them against her thighs.
-Because you are immature. You can't take no for an answer, why are you asking me something if you already know what you want to hear?-
Ah, so the real answer was no.
Obviously it wasn't what Ronan had hoped for, but it was still an answer. Not a thank you, to avoid a reply.
Kate was relieved to see him sigh, take off his large square glasses to wipe away a small tear.
For a moment she hoped he would take it well and forget the first thing she had said to him. Kate hoped Ronan would sit down with her and talk. But she felt her heart turn to lead as he passed her by and headed for the door.
-I need to take a walk. See you at dinner.-
Kate was left alone and disconsolate watching the snow falling outside the window, soft luminous oblivion.
She knew the real deal wasn't the fear of ruining her relationship with Ronan. In that moment she knew that she had never changed, and that perhaps she never would.
Kate had always shied away from relationships when they started getting serious. She had done that in the past when she was young and hot-headed.
And now, old and still alone, she had done it again.
/
Thoughts of the author:
This chapter takes stock of the situation for a few characters and for this reason it is nice and long; y'all don't know how much I enjoyed writing it, especially with Carly who for once is not cutesy (even the tough Lillian got scared) and with Mr. Elliott Gontier's (mis)adventures.
With him I deal with something that almost everyone feels, insecurity.
Elliott is physically not a sex symbol and his personality is meek, when he decides to give it a try with a girl whom he judges "too much" for him, his insecurities overcome him.
But he's not alone. Brent feels insecure too, Carly too, Kate too. And in other chapters Lillian, Krillin, Lapis and Lazuli too.
I think it's normal and SO common, and I wanted to talk about it, especially since there is a lot of talk out there about women feeling inadequate, but much less about men.
Elliott plays geomag with toothpicks and Defiance knows how to down pints in record time: we all have hidden talents (mine is folding my tongue in three).
