Author's Note:
This is a request from a Guest (they reviewed on Chapter 17, you know who you are) Side note, I haven't read Magnus Chase in a while)
Disclaimer, I never claimed to be Irish, and I'm sorry to those you are for the complete bastardization of your beautiful accents.
Cheers!
justapercyjacksonfan
To the Death
Everything in Valhalla was done to the death. This was simply a fact. It was just odd for everyone to be dead at once.
It only ever happened once a week.
It might have happened more often if they fought dragons more than once a week. They never beat the dragons. And Magnus was a quick healer, so he was always alive again before everyone else. And that was boring. What was not boring was the lead up to his death. It usually came in the form of a dragon, big shock, right?
The good news was that their group of battle brothers and sisters often killed a dragon. Well. Jack often killed a dragon, and then floated around, because Magnus would then die on the spot from the effort if he grabbed him. Similar to killing giants, Magnus had to throw Jack to actually take one out. And he couldn't throw Jack again without holding him. So Jack would then start floating around, not killing dragons but keeping them off of the group and they fighting them off in an effort to not be the first ones to die.
"Oh lovely. And I suppose ye all are not finished over there? Come on lads, we've got a dragon kill!" Mallory shouted. Her Gaelic lilt became very pronounced in the heat of battle.
"Woman, we've already killed a dragon. That's more than any of the other floors does."
"And ye all love take credit for that now! Come on, this one is an English blue-scale, and if there's one thing we Irish hate, it's England sure!"
"No one understands you!" he protested, but charged in after her.
Somewhere in the din of battle, Mallory's cry of, "Where's Magnus? I have my arm broken!"
Magnus and Alex, however, weren't about to run towards her, especially as a dragon stepped on her body.
"Probably for the best." Alex muttered. "Given how fast she resurrects she might be around by breakfast tomorrow this way."
Half-born appeared, bloodied and wounded, dragging Mallory's body. "And now I have myself as dead as T.J. Kill it." she was mutterering.
"Quit telling everyone I'm dead." T.J. protested.
"Well ye aren't far off."
"FIx her." Half-born said.
Before Magnus could, Alex stepped forward and cut Mallory's head off.
"That's literally the opposite of fixing her." Magnus said, a little annoyed.
"In this place? Please. No offense, Magnus, but Valhalla does a better job than you do. Besides, decapitation is a better way to die than by organ damage from being stepped on."
"Please never become a doctor."
"Wouldn't dream of it. Want me to help you too, Half-born? You're looking...stabbed."
Rather than answering, Half-born charged, once again, at the dragon. He was promptly killed.
"Well, I offered." she muttered. "Anyone else?"
Both T.J. and Magnus scooched away. Alex just shrugged. "Well, you heard her. How are we killing this dragon?"
"There's a hill over there." T.J. offered.
"Good enough for me." Magnus said. The three of them made it to the hill. Or rather, two of them did. They lost T.J. somewhere along the way.
"Now what?"
"I don't know, we lost all our leaders. Or at least all the people who shout orders at me on a regular basis."
"I shout orders at you all the time." Alex said.
"Right. Then why are you asking me?"
"I don't know. Duck right now!"
Both of them crouched, and a dragon passed over them by a hair's width.
"You distract them, and I'll try and garoute a wing off or something."
"Why am I the bait?"
"Because you literally can't hold onto your weapon without dying?"
"...fine. I hope you get killed first." Magnus said, huffing a little bit.
"Love you too?"
"You know what I mean. I don't like waiting for you all to regenerate."
Alex shrugged. "Sweet. Morbid, but sweet. Now go distract a dragon. I mean, I love you and I cherish you, but right now you're getting on my nerves."
So Magnus distracted the dragon, heroically, and not at all looking like an idiot. Alex transformed into an eagle, and got above the dragon, before dropping onto it's back, and switching back to human form. She hacked off one of its wings, and it plummeted from the sky. Alex managed to shift into an insect form before relieving it of its head, only to die from the acid blood.
But at least she died before Magnus, because it was boring as hell until someone else was no longer dead. He found her in their common space.
"So you love and cherish me?"
"Shut up, Chase. You only get sappy stuff when we're about to die."
So Magnus just didn't comment on the fact that she was holding his hand.
Author's Note:
I was using an internet-Irish person's guide on how to write out Irish dialogue, so if that's wrong….it's still probably my fault. But my traffic stats say that eight people from Ireland have read this fic, so maybe they can correct me in the reviews? Please and thank you?
Anyway, I'm imaging this happening after they've been together for a few decades or whatever. Time is weird in Valhalla, so of course they'd be able to say I love you without it being all weird.
Shout-out time!
(I love posting these later, because it means I get to wake up to reviews and read them throughout the day)
Fairyn - Yes. Percabeth is good.
Guest I Guess - Fluff is my area of expertise, lol. But I'm at least trying to branch out! One of the fics I'm planning is basically all angst. My point put in a much better way, right there. Then you'll be happy to know that I actually slept today...but you'll be less happy to know that it's because my sleep schedule is crap to begin with, and every few days I'll get actual sleep, and then the rest of the time, I can impersonate a vampire!
I'll change it to that….maybe after I post this, maybe tomorrow, we shall see.
Lilbumkin - see, instead I run around the board making dumb decisions until someone gets rid of me. Or don't and then I have to just say, "I'm done, we've been playing for an hour and a half!" Thank you, I was pretty proud of that one.
Wildcat stuck as a human - I'll be sure to fix that. I have not, but I vaguely remember getting ads for it a few months ago.
Have a lovely day!
justapercyjacksonfan
