Chapter 33: Her Apology
I looked around. Lisa was in the back of the cage, meowing at me loudly like she'd been doing it for a while. It was time for her dinner.
"Alright," I said. My voice was wobbly. My cheeks were wet. That made sense considering what happened. I wiped my cheeks and got up. "Alright," I said again. "I get it. You're hungry."
Lisa looked at me with wide eyes. I went over and gave her a quick hug. Then I left the cage. My mind was still half in that dream. The tears hadn't stopped. I wiped my face again and went into the house. At the sink, I washed up.
I needed to get a hold of myself. Mourning my long-dead parents was one thing, but mourning the loss of a person who didn't exist? That had to be crazy.
I slapped my cheeks, hoping that would wake me up. Then I dried my hands and went to the fridge. I grabbed Lisa's food and headed back outside to feed my hungry bobcat.
About a half-hour later I was back in the kitchen washing up. Lisa had been on edge as I fed her and I still wasn't feeling right. I couldn't get over it. I just kept replaying the events in my head. I remembered everything. How Dhiren had just appeared, entering the dream world, him giving me a phone number of all things and of course how he had held me. I had felt safe, rather than suffocated. It had been so real.
Even now, I felt lighter, like I actually had talked to someone about my parents. For one night, it was like I actually had a friend who understood me, but then he had left and I had woken up. I wished I was still asleep. I wished it had been real. I wiped away another tear. I didn't want to be messed up all weekend and Sarah was returning tomorrow night. I needed to prepare for her and pull myself together.
I wiped my hands off and was about to go upstairs and get properly dressed when the doorbell rang. I paused, looking between the stairway and the front door. Who on earth could that be?
The doorbell rang again.
And again.
Okay, whoever it was they were persistent. I shuffled over to the door and looked through the peephole.
Cathleen?
Today was just getting weirder and weirder.
"Kelsey are you there?" she called through the door as she rang the doorbell again. "I need to talk to you."
I just stared. What was she doing here? Cathleen had literally never visited. I was surprised that she even knew where this place was.
"Please Kelsey," she said. There was a pleading tone in her voice as she attacked the doorbell button. Whatever she wanted, I wasn't going to find out by standing around and I did not think she was going anywhere.
I unlocked the door and opened it. "What do you want?"
Cathleen's mouth opened. "Kelsey!" she gasped.
"Yeah…" I wasn't sure why she was so surprised. She had been ringing the doorbell for a solid minute.
"Hi," she said breathily.
I just repeated my question. "What do you want, Cathleen?"
Cathleen looked at the ground. "I've been trying to reach you since yesterday. You wouldn't answer my calls, so I decided to drive over."
She had been calling me? That was news to me. I suppose that was what I got for hiding my phone away to avoid Sarah. "Why have you been trying to reach me?"
Cathleen blushed. "Can I come inside?"
I stared at her.
"Please," she looked at me. "I…I wanted to apologize."
Of all the things she could have said, that was probably the only thing that would have gotten me to let her in.
Soon we were seated at the family dinner table with two glasses of water. Cathleen was sipping hers and looking around the place as I watched her.
"Well?" I asked.
Cathleen's eyes flicked over to me. "Um… could I use the restroom?"
I glared at her for a moment before I pointed behind me. "It's on the left."
Cathleen got up. "I'll be right back."
She was off. I turned and watched her go. Then I look back at my own glass of water. First, she'd asked for water and now she wanted to use the restroom. She was totally stalling, but why? She was the one who had started this.
It was all so weird. First, the Dhiren dream and now Cathleen showing up claiming that she wanted to apologize. Lisa was still recovering. My life was in shambles and Sarah was returning tomorrow. I really didn't need this extra stress. I shouldn't have let Cathleen in.
Fifteen minutes passed and Cathleen still wasn't back from the bathroom. This was starting to feel like a certain family dinner.
I got up. I was going to go check on her.
I went to the bathroom and knocked on the door.
Nothing.
"Cathleen?" I asked, "Are you in there?" I knocked again.
Still nothing.
I turned the knob. It was unlocked.
"I'm coming in," I announced.
I opened the door.
No Cathleen.
What the hell?
I stared at the bathroom like it had the answers, but it was empty. I closed the door. Maybe she'd gone to use the upstairs bathroom?
I went over to the stairs and called up "Cathleen?"
Still nothing.
I climbed up the stairs and checked the other bathroom.
Empty.
Where was she? Had she gotten scared and run away? I searched upstairs. I checked every room, not that there were many. Every bedroom was empty. She wasn't in Sarah and Mike's bathroom either. As I walked through the hallway, I glanced up at the attic. No way she'd be in there, but…
I dashed down the stairs. Maybe she was in the basement. I turned to head over to the basement door. It was close to the downstairs bathroom.
Then a voice called out, "Kelsey?"
I turned. Cathleen was at the table.
I stopped. "Where the hell did you go?"
"I got lost," she said with an awkward shrug.
"Lost?" I repeated. This house wasn't that big.
"In the basement," she added.
I blinked. That had been where I thought she was but I wasn't so sure now. Cathleen looked so…on edge, but this was an awkward conversation. Anyone would be on edge.
I made my way to the table and sat down.
"I'm sorry about that," she said more to the water than me.
There was a long pause as I waited for her to say more. Why hadn't she heard me calling for her? Why had she taken so long? Why was she even here?
I opened my mouth, but Cathleen beat me to it. "Listen Kelsey." She was still staring at her water. "I said that I wanted to apologize."
"Yeah."
She had my attention again. "Look, I…I'm sorry about how I acted for the last couple of months. It was wrong. All you wanted to do was make up and I wasn't ready, so I'm sorry."
I listened as she cataloged every time she'd avoided me or lied to me. It was a lengthy list.
When it seemed like she'd run out of steam, she said, "And I'm sorry about before too. Our original fight. I didn't mean to make you so angry back then." She finally looked up at me. Her face was pale and worried.
She knew that saying that she made me angry was putting it lightly. It was more like I had exploded. I had said some stuff that I regretted even now. I had overreacted and ruined our friendship, but "How was that not supposed to piss me off? You implied that it might have been my parents' own fault that they were killed," I said evenly.
She looked back down at the glass. Her fingers clutched it tightly. "I was 10," she said. "I didn't know how insensitive it was to say. I thought since my dad died, I knew what you were going through. I just thought it was so cool you were going to a normal school and I was jealous. Plus, Matt-"
"What about Matt?" I snapped, interrupting her.
"Nothing," she said quickly. Her eyes met mine for an instant before darting away. "I just wasn't thinking is all and I'm thinking now. We should leave it in the past and start over. I was hoping we could finally catch up."
I stared her down. Cathleen seemed to shrink. She was basically saying the right things. It was almost exactly what I wanted to hear. All I had to do was apologize myself and we could have a new beginning. It was that simple. Except it wasn't.
"Why now, Cathleen?" I asked. "It's been over 5 years since our fight. And several weeks since I started at the circus. What made you come by today?"
Cathleen swallowed. "I'm sorry I took so long."
"Cathleen." Something about my tone made her glance up. "Why are you really here?"
She squeezed the glass tighter. "I told you…I wanted to apologize."
Cathleen's phone buzzed and despite how serious this conversation was, she hurried to check it.
I shook my head.
I'd given Cathleen so many chances and every time she'd either brushed me off or lied to my face. Maybe if she had apologized weeks ago, even eight days ago, I might have been able to forgive her. If she apologized before last night I might have at least been tempted to, but she hadn't.
And this apology she was giving right now felt all wrong. Something was definitely up and I was done with being manipulated.
"I think you should go," I said.
Cathleen looked up from her phone. Her expression was unreadable. "What?" she asked, looking almost dazed.
I felt so tired. "I shouldn't have let you in here. I don't know what's going on, but I'm not falling for whatever trick you're trying to play. I'm done. So, leave."
"But I'm not trying to play a trick," she said. "Honestly, I really am sorry. I want to start over." Somehow, she sounded even less sincere than before.
"Cathleen." My voice was hard now. "Just go."
She didn't move.
I went around the table and grabbed her arm. "Come on," I said.
"No," she cried out desperately. "Please, can't we talk things out some more?"
She resisted my attempt to help her out of the chair. Cathleen was smaller than me, but she was a gymnast. The girl was strong.
"I'm done talking Cathleen. It's time for you to go," I said pulling in earnest.
"No," she cried out again, dragging her feet and clinging onto the armrests.
I couldn't believe this. I tried to move her again. She gritted her teeth. She still hadn't left the chair. "You're acting like a child!" I shouted at her. "Let go."
"No!"
I was yanking her arm now as I demanded, "Why are you doing this? Why did you come here after avoiding me for years? I didn't ask you to come. I didn't want you to. I-"
"It's not always about you, Kelsey!" Cathleen snapped, kicking me in the shin.
I stumbled back and she righted herself in her chair.
"You're always thinking about yourself," she told me in a shaky voice. "You're always complaining about how unfair the world is. You're not the only one with problems."
I stared at her in disbelief. She had just kicked me.
Cathleen just glared at me. "Did you even think about what you were doing?" she said. "How it would affect the circus?"
What had I done? What was she talking about now? "Do you mean me quitting?" I asked. "I think I did everyone a favor."
"You didn't quit," she said.
"Uh…yeah, I did. I-"
"You were fired!"
I blinked. My shock gave way to anger. "What are you even talking about! You're not making sense, Cathleen. I don't know what is going on, but-"
"Yes, you do."
"No. I don't!"
Before I could say anything else, a roar thundered through the air.
I turned toward the sound. It had come from the street. It sounded like a tiger's roar. Dhiren?
I glanced over at Cathleen. "Is Dhiren out there?"
Cathleen was staring at her phone. "I have to go," she said. Then she stood up.
"Cathleen, what is going on?"
Cathleen just walked towards the front door. I raced ahead and blocked the door.
"You're not going anywhere," I told her.
Cathleen held up her phone in my face. "It's over Kelsey. Matt found Ren."
I blinked.
Matt found Dhiren? Had he been lost? The words from my dream came back to me.
I'm sure they are already going crazy about me leaving.
"Did Dhiren run away?"
"Ren didn't run away. You stole him," she said. "We got him back. It's over. Now move!"
She shoved me. It caught me by surprise. I fell back and both me and the door swung away from her.
Cathleen shot out the door. I righted myself and went after her. Cathleen was sprinting down the street that bordered the forest. She was faster than me. I struggled to keep up. She turned a corner and I followed. Then I saw where she was headed. Mr. Henry's truck and an attached animal trailer were parked on the street.
"Matt!" Cathleen called out.
Matt leaned out the passenger seat window and waved. He was barely recognizable. His face was covered in bruises. He saw me and scowled.
"Come on," he shouted. "Let's go."
Cathleen practically jumped into the driver's seat. I ran into the road. I stood right in front of the truck.
"Stop!" I cried.
I saw the odd couple glare at me.
The truck went into reverse. It changed gears and moved passed me.
I turned and I caught sight of Dhiren looking out of the animal trailer window. His paws grasped the bars and his blue eyes were filled with despair.
I didn't hesitate. I started running after the truck and shouting "Dhiren!"
The tiger cried out in response as the truck turned to the corner. By the time, I made it to the intersection, the truck was long gone and Dhiren with it. I stared blankly at the empty streets. As I came to terms with things, my hands balled up into fists. I started back towards the house.
Somehow Dhiren had escaped and now he had been captured. Cathleen and Matt thought they could just trick me and drive away with him. They were wrong. They weren't going to get away that easily. Not after Dhiren looked at me like that. He needed help. I was going to give it to him. Even if it meant returning to the circus.
A/N: Hey Everybody,
It's beginning. This marks the true start of the Climax arc. I can't believe this is happening. I might actually be done with this fic soon.
But it's not over yet. We still have a few chapters to go. Look forward to more soon!
