Chapter 31

Erwin VI – What Could Have Been


"You should try smiling more, Levi."

"What is there to smile about?"

"The promise of a new day?" Erwin suggests, chuckling down at his grouchy Captain.

One week after Levi's impossible return, the Survey Corps receives summons directly from the Royal Government through Darius Zackly. A bit of a frenzy from the Scouts and media reporters ensued as the Scouts made their way from Shiganshina to Trost District. Erwin would have ignored the summons, but if it has something to do with the capital city, he has to comply. Moreover, the Government wants Levi.

The Commander and Captain climb out of the luxurious carriage provided for them. Erwin wears a formal military uniform of a dark green double-breasted trench coat and combat boots. Beside him, the Captain is similarly attired. The Royal Guards in Mitras meet them at the end of a long colonnade and from there on, escort them further into the castle grounds. Erwin has been here several before with Commander Keith Shadis, and he is all but sure this is Levi's first time. Still, the Captain scowls at the pageantry.

The guards lead them upstairs, across glamourous hallways with crystallized chandeliers. Erwin is amused that a Captain heroic bravery would put them into this honor of recognition.

"Are we meeting up with Signe here?" Levi asks.

"I am not sure. Though I am hoping we'd see her."

Erwin glances at the Captain's face and catches the slight glimmer in his stoic face. Only a dense fool would not see the Captain's change in demeanor ever since he returned. He looks better somehow, the temper curbed more now. Erwin wonders if that is Sieglinde's influence on the Captain.

When Levi perks up at something ahead, Erwin follows his gaze.

Sieglinde is waiting for them at an intersection, wearing her Military Police coat and black gloves. She notices their approach and immediately beams at them, running towards them with a slight bounce on her feet. At the last step, the carpet brunches and she almost trips, but Levi snatches her by the arm before she completely falls.

"Don't embarrass yourself so far away from home," he scolds her.

"If I trip, the embarrassment extends to the MPs," she retorts, puffing her chest with pride.

She turns to Erwin. Something crosses in her features−something that Erwin himself, sharp and quick as he is, could not place. Yet the hesitation in Sieglinde melts as quickly as it appeared as she beams some more, and jumps into her brother's arms. He catches her as she buries her face in his chest.

"I missed you, Erwin! Ohh, I missed your smell…"

"I missed you as well, Signe." Erwin leans down and presses his nose on her hair.

"Congratulations on your award, Levi," she says, peeking from where she is still holding Erwin around the waist like some little girl obsessed with her doll.

"Yeah, thanks," the Captain grumbles.

"Are we ready?" A guard leads them towards the throne room.

The doors are closed, and more guards flank the sides. Erwin nods at the guards, who open the large double doors to the spacious room with glass windows dominating the back of the single chair at the center. A figure in white sits at the very top, with four regional lords and a pastor from the religious Order of the Walls. The five others are seated on chairs below King Fritz's throne.

Without sparing another glance, Erwin and Levi leave Sieglinde behind as the doors shut behind them. Her presence is not mandatory for this meeting, but Nile Dok is considerate enough to let her meet them. Erwin and Levi step forward, passing by the crowd of Military Police officers and Garrisons, Commanders Nile and Pixis included, to witness this rare moment of triumph for the Survey Corps.

Erwin steps back and lets Levi to continue forward, towards Commander-in-Chief Zackly, an old man not much taller than Levi himself, with bushy white mustache and beard. Erwin joins the ranks of his fellow Commanders, between Nile and Pixis. This is Levi's moment of glory−and Erwin couldn't be prouder as he watches the Captain kneel before Zackly, the lords, and the King to receive a golden medal for his brave feat of saving all 31 lives of his squad members.

A little charade, Erwin knows, to appease the Shiganshina families who are practically worshipping Levi after their children's safe return. The Scouts' outpost over there still overflows with gifts and baskets of food and wine. It had been a trouble bringing them all back to Trost with them.

Once Levi stands again, the small crowd breaks into a modest clapping. A group of reporters are scribbling away in their notepads. Some are rough sketching the image if Darius Zackly shaking Levi's hand as congratulations. One artist goes as far as also sketching Erwin with the other two Commanders. Odd.

The awarding ceremony takes only about half an hour, before the rest of the gathered crowd are being ushered out of the throne room. Erwin waits up for Levi as the Captain shares a few last words of acknowledgement from Zackly.

"Congratulations," says Erwin when Levi walks back to him. "The Commander-in-Chief seems taken."

"Not really." His nose wrinkles. The golden medal has a dark green silk ribbon, and is emblazoned with the images of the three Goddesses Sheena, Rose, and Maria. "Just some empty words for show."

"You don't think that this is all for show, do you? I am sure the Commander is earnest in this one."

"Maybe," Levi says without much conviction.

They step out of the throne room. Sieglinde meets up with them. "Congratulations, Captain. I'm so proud."

Levi removes the medal and tosses it to her chest. "Here. Have it melted down for your blades."

She jolts. "What? Why? This is beautiful! I would hang this in your office if you want."

"I don't really care. I didn't become a soldier for fancy uniforms and awards. You can have it."

"If you say so." Sieglinde deflates and holds the medal against her heart.

Erwin smiles at the interaction, the way the Captain looks perpetually annoyed by the theatrics while Signe is nowhere near sharing Levi's irritation. On the contrary, she seems the most excited among the three of them, making Erwin chuckle under his breath. Then someone puts their hand on his shoulder, interrupting his observations of the pair, and turns around for the other person.

Darius Zackly whisks him away for a quiet conversation. "I'm glad your last expedition turned out the way it did," says the older man, peering at the blond over the rim of his glasses. "Though the reports I received, particularly from Hange Zoë, are very alarming. Do you think there is truth into it?"

"Captain Levi himself fought the Moonlight Titans," Erwin answers levelly. "Along with thirty more recruits who testify that they saw the same kind of Titans. Right now, I am proposing to mount another expedition to focus more on this new kind, hoping they might shed some light in the Titans' true nature."

"And do you have plans how to complete such another dangerous mission?"

"Hange Zoë has proposals that I would like you to consider, Commander."

"Just as well." Zackly nods. His eyes slide over to the two youths behind Erwin. He has already acknowledged Levi's presence earlier, and so appears interested on the other one. He glances at the Scout Commander once. "Your younger sister, I presume?"

"Y-Yes," Erwin murmurs.

"Ah, the troublemaker," Zackly says with a hint of surety.

"Yes." Erwin signs in defeat.

"Would you introduce me?"

"But of course." Now this comes off as a surprise.

With a smile, Erwin ushers the older man towards the pair and gestures for his sister to come forward.

"Signe, this is Commander-in-Chief Darius Zackly, the general of the three military branches. Commander Zackly, this is my sister, Sieglinde Smith, Special Ops Squad Vice Captain and the Scouts' combat instructor."

Zackly offers a hand. "My pleasure to finally meet you, Sieglinde Smith."

She smiles and shakes his hand, bowing her head a little. "The pleasure's all mine, Commander."

"I heard many news about you, from Erwin's reports."

"I hope I do not disappoint more than I already did."

"Not really." To Erwin's surprise, Zackly's lips twitch into a small smile. He looks down on her with a hint of a grandfather-like thoughtfulness, and pats her and Levi on the shoulders. "I am expecting great things from this generation's Survey Corps." He looks at Erwin with the same proud glimmer. "Despite the previous failures, you have already proven yourself to rise from your failures and humiliations. Keep that resolve, and we will surely triumph over the Titans."

"Yes, sir!" The three Scouts salute.

"I shall be going now." Zackly turns his back to them and says over his shoulder, "I'll be looking forward on your next expedition's success, Erwin Smith. Good luck."

"Thank you very much, sir!"

"Great," Levi grumbles once the Commander is out of earshot. "Can we go now?"

"Wait! Don't go just yet!" Sieglinde pouts at them both. "If you leave now, I'll be left alone with the MPs!"

"Tch. Just shuffle yourself inside the carriage trunk and we'll be on our way," Levi deadpans.

"Levi!" Erwin scolds. "We cannot steal a member of the Military Police."

"Relax. It was just a suggestion. Watch out for your blood pressure."

Sieglinde covers her mouth to stifle a laugh.

"Ah, there you are, you three." Nile Dok approaches them with a wave of his hand. Erwin turns around to meet the friend he has not seen in some years. Nile puts a hand on his shoulder. "It's been a while, hasn't it? Some three or four years, right? You haven't changed. How's Mike?"

"He's all right, thriving in the Scouts as always." Erwin smiles.

"That's good to know." Nile glances at Sieglinde, then back at Erwin. "I am thankful for your cooperation with my last request. The mission was a complete success, I'll have you know. Zackly and the rest of the regional lords are pleased with the result."

"I am glad to hear that."

"Listen, do you three have someplace to go to?"

"Uh, Levi and I have to return to Trost. Signe will have to stay here." His sister's lips tremble downwards.

"If you three are not so busy, perhaps you'd like to come home with me in Stohess District?" Nile suggests, sheepishly scratching his nape. "I haven't been home in weeks and I promised Marie I'd go back home today. Maybe you'd like to join us for some simple family dinner?"

Erwin blinks at the offer. "Of course… We'd love to join," he says, prompting a quiet huff from the Captain.

Nile grins back at them, noticing that the young woman is still pouting. "Relax, Sieg. I did say the three of you, so of course you're invited as well." He chuckles when her features brighten. "I have a few last orders to disseminate to everyone, so I'll meet you all at the gates?"

"Agreed."

"Good." Then, Nile gathers his officers and heads to the other direction.

When Erwin turns around to his two companions, Levi is crossing his arms and openly glaring at him. He blinks, playing the innocent, blinking ice-blue eyes. The Captain just snorts and rolls his eyes.

Chuckling, Erwin leads his ragtag group outside the palace, traversing the long hallways with glass windows and gilt panels. Outside, the grey skies are heavy with snowfall, swirling with the wind.

Sieglinde is silent throughout the walk, but then remembers something. "Isn't Marie your ex-girlfriend?"

A blush creeps up from his cheek, neck, to the tips of his ears. "She was not. And that was a long time ago."

"Is this okay though?" she asks, voice teasing.

"Signe, please don't mention this when we get there," Erwin sighs.

"He's very ashamed," she whispers aside to Levi, who smirks at the Commander.

This will be one hell of a day.

They wait for Nile at the palace's entrance doors. The skies are gradually turning a darker shade of grey, but they could not see the sun sinking beneath these clouds. Whereas Erwin basks in the coldness, letting the chilly winds whip his pale cheeks flush, his sister burrows underneath her much-more extravagant furred coat and shivers. Levi, standing between the siblings, looks as if he wants to be anywhere but here.

Sieglinde sneezes. Erwin is about to offer his handkerchief when Levi pulls out his own.

"Stop spreading your germs," Levi scolds, pressing the cloth on her red nose.

"It's−It's so c-cold…" she whines and pulls up the furred collar of her coat.

"Where's your scarf, then? Why aren't you wearing warmer clothes?"

"L-Left them behind." Another sneeze. Levi wrinkles his nose. "Can't afford to be late on your awarding ceremony, you know…" She shivers as another blast of cold wind surges down on them, whipping her silver hair around them. Erwin purses his lips, as Sieglinde's eyes turn glassy from the cold. She has always been so vulnerable in winters.

Without missing a beat, Levi removes his blue scarf and wraps it around Signe, covering the lower half of her face with the fabric. "Wear that for now," he says. "Don't wipe your snot on it."

She nods, inhaling his scent. She visibly calms down. "You're the best, Levi."

"Not in front of your brother," he says, smirking again. "He'd be jealous."

"Oh, sorry!" Sieglinde laughs and nuzzles on her brother's right arm. "Don't worry. I love you, too, Erwin." She sighs and leans her smaller build against his own, and Erwin is not loathe letting her warm up against his body heat. They stay like that for a few more minutes, until Nile comes running towards them.

"Sorry for making you guys wait for so long. You okay, Sieg?"

"Yes!" She raises her hand up.

"Alright, I arranged a carriage to take us home. Let's go."


It is already dark when they exit Mitras territory and plunge into the streets of Stohess. Erwin stares out of the window, seeing not the houses, the stalls, or the candlelight inside the homes. What he sees is something from years past, when he was just a trainee in the Training Corps. A young man of twenty with hopes and dreams no one else in this world could have imagined. Mike and Nile shared his dreams soon enough, but they never knew the extent of Erwin's dream. He had his life planned out way ahead of him.

Until he met her.

The carriage stops in front of a three-story townhouse with pointed roofs. The lot is enclosed inside black iron fences. A banner of the Military Police Brigade flutters on one of the iron grills. Nile leads with guests across the small stoned courtyard with planters and other gardening tools. Few toys, a small cart and a wooden wagon are put aside, gathering snow.

Upon entering the house, Nile calls out to announce his arrival. Erwin and his companions step into the Dok home and start looking at their new surroundings: a neat living room, earning Levi's nod of approval; modest furniture and family paintings hanged to the walls. The entire space is well lit, and warm, very warm. Erwin already feels at home, as he slips off his coat and hangs it on a hook.

He glances at his companions. Levi is back with his awkward domestic persona while Signe, relieved from her trench coat but keeping Levi's scarf on, is bouncing on the balls of her feet.

Oh, no. This is not good.

Erwin is not a religious person, but he prays that Signe loves him enough not to embarrass him tonight.

"Welcome back!" A woman with wavy brown hair emerges from the kitchen and tiptoes to kiss her husband on the cheek. She ruffles his dark hair and fusses over his brown jacket, before turning her hazel eyes to their guests. "Erwin? My! I wouldn't have recognized you!"

"Hello, Marie." Erwin places a friendly kiss on her cheek. "And here was Nile saying I didn't change a bit."

"Well, you did," she insists, noting the dark bags under his eyes.

"You remember my little sister Signe, don't you?"

"Why, yes." Marie smiles and admits Sieglinde into a warm embrace. "How have you been, Sieg?"

"Never better," Sieglinde says with a laugh.

"And this is Levi, the Captain of the Special Ops Squad."

Levi inclines his head a little, bowing. "It's very nice to meet you, Mrs. Dok."

Marie's smile never falters. In fact, it gets more radiant with every passing moment. "I am very happy to meet you, and have Erwin and Sieg here. Now, why don't we all proceed to the dining room? I have everything prepared for the night."

"I thought I told you I can help with the housework," Nile grumbles at her.

"I'm sure you can, but you've been working so late." Marie beckons them to a large rectangular table, laden with all sorts of food, ranging from a thick creamy soup to honeyed chicken and some bread. She nods as they take their seats and cups her hands around her mouth. "Children, dinner time!"

Erwin doesn't miss a pair of children racing each other down the stairs.

Nile is quick to scold them. "What did I tell you about running?"

A young boy, around eight perhaps, fiddles with his fingers. "That it's dangerous?"

"Yes, that's right," Nile says, switching the hardened Commander persona to a strict yet loving father. He puts a hand on the boy's brown hair. "These are Papa's friends from the Scouts. Introduce yourself."

"Um−" The boy has Marie's hair and eyes. "My name is Gabriel."

"Good." Nile nods and carries a smaller girl in his arms, kissing her on the cheek. "And your name is?"

"Emma," the little girl mumbles, her hazel eyes brighter than her mother's.

Sieglinde melts at the sight of the two children. "And how old are you, Emma?"

Everyone watches, slowly melting−except Levi−as Emma holds up three fingers for the soldier.

"And how many is that?" Sieglinde prompts, tone soft.

The girl stares at her raised fingers, her baby lips pouting. "Three?"

Sieglinde beams and claps her hands. "Yes, you're a smart girl, Emma!"

Nile chuckles at the exchange and directs his two children to their seats. As the head of the family, he sits at the center, with Erwin, Sieglinde, and Levi at his right-hand side, and then Marie, Emma, and Gabriel on his left. Candlelight illuminates everyone's faces as they say grace, their eyes closed and their hands clasped together, for the food on their table.

"So, how are things back home, Erwin?" Nile engages them all in casual conversation.

"Mother is doing fine," Erwin answers after sipping the creamy soup. "She continues with her trade and could only do well without her two troublesome children in the way." He offers an innocent smile as he feels Sieglinde ramming her boot to his leg beneath the table. "We visited her not too long ago, actually."

"And how are the Scouts this time around?" Marie asks, worrying her bottom lip. "I heard some bad news."

"Marie," Nile says in a soft scolding tone.

"It's all right," Erwin offers. "We have expeditions once every month. It helps keeping our soldiers in their best physical and mental states, and to keep the Scouts from disbanding." He feels as if the statement is not only for Marie, but for Nile as well. He slices a small portion of his chicken. "Recently, I have been feeling rather more confident with our latest discoveries. And the fact that I have the most reliable soldiers that I could think of."

In the corner of his eyes, Levi takes a sip of his water.

"You're in the Scouts now, too, aren't you, Sieg?" Marie turns to his sister.

"Oh, yes, going back and forth between Scouts and MPs," Sieglinde says with a hint of sarcasm. "I think I might have the worst luck of all the soldiers out there. I might be sent to the Garrison next."

"Nonsense." Nile shakes his head. "You did well in the last mission."

"I did nothing but watch from above the tower," Sieglinde answers, offering him a sidelong smile.

"Still enough for a contribution," Nile's voice is more strained, and like that, the topic is dropped.

Marie comes to save the conversation. "How do you like the chicken, Levi? Is it all right?"

The Captain almost flinches at the sudden unwanted attention, but plays it cool as he nods. "Yes, it has a very rich flavor, the honey seeped right into the meat. It's very delicious."

"Thank you," Marie sighs. "It's my first time trying it."

"You've done well for your first time," he reassures her.

"Gabe?" Marie notices that her son is not eating, but staring at the older man seated across the table. She follows his gaze to the Captain, who is intent on ignoring the boy. "What's wrong?"

"Mama, is the Captain's face broken?" Gabriel asks.

Nile blanches. Erwin chokes on his water. Sieglinde snorts and covers her face with the scarf.

Levi's eyebrow twitches, but he says nothing.

Marie is his only saving grace. "Why would you say that to the nice Captain, sweetheart?"

"His face doesn't move," Gabriel says, a matter-of-fact. He turns innocent hazel eyes to his mother. A cute little boy with his messy brown hair and childlike plumpness. "Is his face broken?"

"Yes," Levi answers, voice strained. "My face is broken."

"Maybe someone can help you fix it?" the boy suggests, enlightened that his guess is correct.

"I don't think someone can help me, br−kid." Levi is a hair short from calling him brat.

"Oh, maybe she can help you!" Gabriel points his spoon at Sieglinde's direction.

"She tried already," Levi says, "but it never works."

"I will try and try until he does though," Sieglinde promises the boy.

The Captain checks at her face, calms down, and busies himself with the food.

The rest of the evening is spent sharing stories about the simplicity of life. Weather. Work. Flashbacks from their training days. A few inside jokes over wine and the candlelight. Marie comes in and out of the kitchen to deliver a warm batch of honeycakes as dessert. For drinks, she serves hot cocoa for the children−and Sieglinde−and an experimental hot hazelnut toddy for Levi. Like before, the Captain praises her for the experiments and she thanks him with a smile.

Erwin and Nile engage each other in some military issues, Military Police and Survey Corps alike. Nothing too classified not to share over a dinner table. The others are free to hear about this and that, the activities of the Royal Government and their measures for lasting the food resources throughout the winter.

Marie shares her children's accomplishments in school: Gabriel, at seven years old, is in his first year of elementary school. Emma, at merely three, has accomplished with doodling with her crayons on the paper, and not on the wall.

Erwin watches the small girl and sees Marie so much in Emma's bright face and eyes. A small girl, perhaps as small as Signe when she was also three years old. Damn. It's been sixteen years since Signe was three. Where'd the time go? While he was busy devising the Long Scouting Distance Formation, Nile is having the best time in his life with raising a lovely family.

Suddenly, a puppy is barking at the door.

Cue Sieglinde gasping in complete delight and Levi rolling his eyes.

"A puppy!"

Gabriel runs off and comes back to the dining room with a small puppy with fluffy white fur.

"It's so cute!" Sieglinde drops on the floor and holds out her arms for the small creature.

"It's a marshmallow," Levi says, watching her from his above his chair. "Or a walking-barking cloud."

On cue, the puppy barks at him, lolling pink tongue happily.

Sieglinde squeals and buries her face in the white fur. "What's his name?"

Emma joins them, also seated on the floor. "He's Snowy."

Levi snorts. "Original."

"Oh, stop hating," Sieglinde scolds him. She bounces the puppy and says, "Bark?"

Snowy barks again.

Nile sips his red wine. "We're still potty-training him, and listening to some simple orders."

Gabriel nods as he pats Snowy's head. "Papa, someone's at the door."

"What?" Nile sputters and immediately answers the calls, stressing that his son should have told him at once. He leaves everyone else on the table, with Marie starting to clear the mess.

Erwin and Levi stand together, helping her with the load.

She laughs, a soft tinkling sound. "It's all right, gentlemen. I can handle this."

Emma patters over to her and tugs at her skirt. "Mama, can we show the nice lady to our playroom?"

"Yes, of course, baby. Go ahead and bring Sieg upstairs. You and your brother both."

"Can Snowy come with us?" Emma pulls out the innocent-eyes card that Erwin himself knows too well.

"Okay, you can take him, too. But remember to clean your toys afterwards."

Levi nods in appreciation. Just then, the little girl pads over to him next. "Want to come, mister?"

The Captain frowns, but not at the girl. He must be frowning at the idea of him playing along with two children, an immature young woman who is far too excitable for tonight, and a dog. A frigging dog. It amuses Erwin that Levi seems to gather all ounce of politeness in his voice.

"Go ahead, Levi," Erwin says, hammering nails to his friend's coffin. "I can help here."

"But−" Levi protests, but Emma has her small hand on the Captain's hand already, tugging him towards the base of the staircase where Gabriel and Sieglinde are waiting for them. Snowy wags his tail as the Captain joins their unlikely group. "Fine. Whatever."

"You're very considerate, Levi," Erwin teases as he carries the larger plates to the kitchen.

He catches Marie piling all the plates and saucers into the sink. He puts the dishes down and sets to rolling his dark blue sleeves to his elbows. "I can help with the washing," he offers quietly.

Hazel eyes flit once at his face, then Marie smiles. "You can help drying them," she offers instead.

"Sounds good." And they proceed to the task, Marie handing over the washed dishes for Erwin to pat them dry with a cloth and stuff them back to their rightful places in the cupboards and shelves.

As he is reaching out for the next plate, his fingers accidentally brush over Marie's, making them both flinch. He shies away and clears his throat. "Sorry."

"It's all right," she murmurs, cradling her hand he touched.

A bulging, prominent red-brown scar runs the length of the back of her right hand, from the base of her pinky to the bone of her thumb. It might be the only imperfect thing to her otherwise beautiful face and character. But Erwin could see that Marie is not ashamed of it.

Actually, she laughs at his staring. "It's been a while, hasn't it?"

He blinks twice and shifts, awkward. "I didn't meant to stare."

"I would have worn gloves if I didn't want anyone to see it. Besides, you were there that night, weren't you?"

"Yes, I was," he breathes, remembering the night.

It was another weekend for the Training Corps back then. A mock defense drill as planned by Instructor Roth, taking his trainees down to Shiganshina to practice with the lads from the Garrison. After a well-done practice, trainees were allowed to drink themselves to a stupor. Marie had been a server in Erwin, Mike, and Nile's favorite bar, and visited her there more often than not to regale her with their misadventures and such, since she had been so interested in the military.

Most of the Garrison officers were there as well, drinking too much to handle. One in particular braved to stand up to Erwin's table, where Marie was serving, and straight up confessed his feelings for her. Feelings she politely declined−but the man would have none of it.

Rejection made him blind. Then next came anger that she was spending more time with trainees than an actual soldier. Mike sensed the hostility long before the man blew up, and offered to take Marie to a safe distance. She was more than happy to come along, but the man had had enough, tackling Mike like a madman.

There had been a knife involved as he launched forward. Marie threw herself between them−right hand outstretched−and received the brunt of the attack. Mike and Nile forced the suitor down to the ground while Erwin was tending to the wound.

Two stitches and one month with a bandaged hand.

And one month later, she was still serving them desserts and drinks with the same radiant smile.

"Sieg and the Captain seem pretty close," Marie shifts the topic once more.

"What makes you say that?" Erwin couldn't decide whether the change is for the good or not.

"Well, the Captain's face is broken, so it's hard to tell his emotions." They share a knowing grin at the quip. "But I've seen how Sieg looks at him. That adoring look is saved only for you and Mike."

"I suppose Levi earned that spot."

"What's the matter?" She laughs, catching his slight hesitation. "You don't approve?"

"Not that I don't. I mean−I respect both Levi and Signe as both my soldiers and friends." He continues patting the bowl and mulls over his words. "They haven't told me anything, and I would not want to force myself on them. Everyone takes time, you know."

"But you don't disapprove?" She hands him the next saucer.

"Oh, no." He chuckles good-naturedly. "On the contrary, I do approve. Signe has always had the bigger heart between us two. So full of love and affections for everyone that she needs someone to invest all those to them. I am quite relieved she chose Levi. Any other man, soldier or not, I might have given a hard time."

Marie's eyes gleam. "Any other man would face the wrath of Erwin Smith?"

"And Mike Zacharias," he hums. "I swear that guy is our brother from another mother."

"What makes Captain Levi different than any other man?"

"The fact that Signe chose him is enough to soothe my old man's nerves." He chuckles. "On top of that, Levi is strong and independent, with good sense of judgement and extreme sense of responsibility over his duties and his subordinates. More than a bit rough on the edges, but overall−a good and reliable man."

"He sounds fantastic for our impulsive, decisive Sieglinde."

"He's getting good at reining her in," he agrees.

"And what about you?" She smiles at his puzzled expression. "Where's your lady, Erwin?"

"There's no one." He shrugs.

"No one for the brave and handsome Commander of the Survey Corps?"

"The moment they find out I'm from the Scouts, they'd all go bolting to the other direction."

"Why should they?" She snorts, a little annoyed. "You're a wonderful human being. In any case, if they bolt to the other direction, then you don't deserve them. You deserve someone who will love you for yourself."

"I have all the love I need from family and friends."

"But wouldn't you want to have a family of your own? A son or a daughter to raise?"

Erwin thinks about it for a moment. He had a chance of playing father to a younger sister whose father died because of Erwin's own foolishness. He had raised Signe until she was ten years old. What difference would it make if he has his own children? Wouldn't it be the same experience−feeding, clothing, playing, telling bedtime stories−but minus the presence of a loving wife? He glances at Marie and knows he would not have the same experience. Not anymore.

"I am fine where I am now," he says after a while. "It's not like I feel incomplete without a family. The Survey Corps is my family. From my Squad Leaders down to the most timid cadet. I watch over them all, guide them all, provide help and support when I can. It is the closest thing I would ever have to raising children and shaping minds to become useful members of the society.

Plus, I don't think I have the potential to be a good father," he admits rather shyly. He raised Signe and look how she turned out: a human equivalent of sunshine thrown with gunpowder all over it. "If anything, I think I have the 'fun uncle' potential. Signe can have her children if she wants them."

"Oh, Erwin! I think you're invalidating yourself too much!"

"No, no, I am being completely honest here."

Just then, Nile walks into the kitchen. "Sorry if I left all of a sudden," he says, dark hair rumpled from the cold winds outside. Before his wife starts fussing over him, he holds up a palm. "I received a new order from Commander-in-Chief Zackly."

Erwin stiffens. "And?"

"Where are Sieg and Levi?" Nile extends the suspense.

"Upstairs." Marie wipes her hand on a cloth. "What's the matter?"

"It's something I'd tell them, too." Nile disappears from the kitchen as Marie and Erwin exchange looks.

Hurriedly, they finish with the dishes and join the others back in the dining room. Levi is descending from the stairs, looking all grumpy with white fur standing out against his deep green cloak. Behind him, Sieglinde is patting the fur off her own coat. The two children are nowhere in sight, probably still clearing up their toys as their mother once ordered them.

They sit back on the table and Nile stares at the young woman's face.

She shrinks under his dark thoughtful gaze.

"Oh, god, please tell me I didn't burn the headquarters from all the way here," she deadpans.

"Nothing of the sort." Nile's lips twist into a small smile. "I gathered you here to bring good news, straight from Commander Zackly." He produces a folder and slides it over to Erwin. He starts explaining: "As it turns out, after Captain Levi's awarding ceremony at the palace, Zackly deemed it a good decision to approve all of the Scouts proposals stuck on his desk."

"Which means…?" Sieglinde prompts her brother.

"Which means we're free to go all out on our next expedition," Erwin breathes, unable to imagine this sort of luck. All of their proposals, from Hange's ten-page plan down to Levi's request for more budget for cleaning supplies, all agreed to by Zackly with all the needed resources. An expedition, sponsored and supported by the government itself. This is so much better than raising a child.

"One more thing," Nile tells Sieglinde. "You're relieved of duty from the Military Police."

"You mean… Really?"

"Really." He nods and extends a hand to her. "You did very well, Sieg. All those hard work and knocking some sense into those privileged brats' heads paid off. You no longer have to stress yourself with them. And don't worry about the moving process−I will have your belongings and carriage prepared first thing in the morning."

"Hurray!" She throws up her hands and clings around Levi's neck. "I'm coming home tomorrow!"

"Don't get too excitable," he scolds, disentangling himself from her.

"But the thing remains! I am still going home!"

"Yeah. Sure. Fine. Whatever."

"Stop frowning though." Sieglinde nudges the furrow between his brows.

Nile and Marie Dok chuckle at them.

Erwin recovers himself from Zackly's support and nods to his long-time friend as thanks. He observes them both−Nile and Marie, husband and wife, father and mother to two beautiful children.

What could have been if Erwin had the courage to balance his dream and his want for a family? Maybe he would have been married by now, with two children−a naughty son and a sweet daughter. Maybe he would have even named them Gabriel and Emma, spitting images of their mother, and then have a dog of their own. Then Signe would come along as their aunt, playing with the children. Levi might even be in the picture. The grumpy uncle, perhaps?

That last part softens him. Such a faraway dream. He'd rather go out there and meet with Titans than stay indoors in the arms of a loving wife.

Ah. What could have been, indeed.


Author's Notes: Erwin the fun uncle, confirmed.

I've written this chapter long before Erwin's death in Season 3 was revealed. Rereading this chapter in his POV makes me all the more emotional. It really does make me wonder what his life would have been if he was not a Scout. Even if he was a Scout, he still could have chosen to have a family. All the 'what ifs' just hurts my heart and soul even more. I miss Erwin's character, I really do.

Rant: Start!

Also, I'm updating because I have recently seen the anime's Season 4. I've been holding off for weeks because I'm not emotionally ready−but I caved. AND HOLY SHIT! Mappa did so well in this season! The art style and animations are just top class! I'm so hyped to finally see Marley in the anime, especially the Warriors! (Note: I have officially fallen in love with Porco Galliard, maybe expect a fanfic of him soon!) AND THAT LAST EPISODE? With Eren vs. War Hammer Titan, AND THEN Levi's entrance? Let me tell you I screamed with tears in my eyes. I missed Levi so freaking much to say the least. I'm so excited for the anime and everything it has to offer for us fans.

Rant: Over!

*cullenett - Thank you for your kind words! I've been feeling a lot better lately, too! I'm glad you're enjoying the story and even Kenny's sudden reappearance, haha!

*hascroggin - I hope you had awesome holidays!

*Ridethelightning26 - Yay, glad you enjoyed Kenny's little screentime! I do believe his appearance is due so that we could learn more about Levi's background. They both are such fascinating characters!

*Foxx21 - Thank you so much for the support! Yes, times are tough these days but I'm sure all of us could pull through! Sending you lots of love!

*John joe - Thank you so much!

*StuckInside - OMG, you binged read the story in two days? Kudos to you! Thank you so much for letting me know that you're enjoying the story! And I'm glad Levi and Signe, however chaotic these two are when they're together, make you happy!

*lizyeh2000 - Thank you so much for following! Keep safe!

*Guest - When I first read your review, I felt instant dread and thought "Is this how people feel when Signe threatens them?" LOL. Not gonna lie, you had me in the first half! I hope you enjoy this chapter like the last one. Kenny was indeed a wild card, and his appearance will indeed affect the course of the story in the near future *wink wink*

That's all for now, everyone! Stay safe and healthy! Love you all, a lot! ❤️

P.S. What do you guys think about a Porco Galliard/OC fic? Are there any Porco fangirls (like me) out there?