"Sorry, it's just that I don't see spark anymore"
"Yes, I love her than you."
"Sorry, we're over"
"You're boring just like the others"
"You're really desperate"
"You're just desperate to love"
"Aren't you tired? That's why all boys in Hogwarts sees you as a toy"
They keep repeating inside of my head. I just can't stand it anymore. I grabbed bag and went to the Great Hall. I just cried my eyes out in the girls bathroom.
All of them are staring at me. I mean I look like a mess. My eyes are puffy and red. I sighed and went over to my 'friends'
They just gave me a small smile and went back to their business
Seriously, are you guys still my friends or you all used my weaknesses?
I sighed and quietly ate my food. After that I went back to my house's common room. I mumbled the password, but it seems that the painting didn't hear me
"Oh dear, I'm letting you in because you look dreadful and broken. Now in you go" I gave him a small smile and I went to my dorm.
I pulled over the covers and silently cried there.
The next morning, I woke up pretty early. I looked over to my mirror and my eyes, they are really swollen. It looks like a bee stung it. I sighed and fixed myself and readied my books for today's classes.
I have Potions today with the Slytherins today. And they would probably make fun of me being dump again.
I skipped breakfast and went immediately to Snape's Class. I sat there jotting some notes from my book. Studying in advance. Not caring if some students are having a chit chat.
Soon the class is full, and Snape told us we are going to make a love potion, or Amortentia
Great. What a great day.
"Now, you all are working in partners. And I will be the one who will assign. L/n and Malfoy..." I went to Malfoy's place and sat down.
"So, you got dump again huh" He teased me and I looked at him. He got surprised when I looked at him with my tears almost spilling. I quickly wiped it and sighed
"I'm getting the ingredients. You ready the cauldrons" I said and went to pick up some ingredients.
We worked silently and I'm surprised that he didn't teased me all day. Normally when I got dump he would make fun of it.
As soon as we finished , Snape wants us to make an essay and smell the Amortentia. Which is lucky because I can't smell anything.
"You go first" He said and I nodded, I smelled the potions and I wrote down what I smelled.
"What did you smelled?" He asked me, I shrugged and looked at my parchment
"Drugs. Abuse and Broken glass"
"That's...weird. We should smell the one what attracts us most"
"I know. But looks like you didn't know about the effects of being broken hearted." I said to him. He just looked at me. With those scared, and hurt eyes.
"Well what do you smell?" I asked him, breaking the silence between us two. He leaned a but and smelled the cauldron
"I smell, cherries..and fresh flowers. I also smell tears. That's weird." My eyes went wide. I don't know why but cherries and fresh flowers are my perfume.
I avoided his gaze and went to my essay to distract my mind. I can't fall in love again. I'm still lovesick.
••••••••••••••••••••••••
I saw my ex, Alex in the hallway, snogging my very own bestfriend . I felt my heart beat in broken. Slowly I feel my tears I quickly wiped it away.
I went to the Prefect Bathroom. And cried there. No one was here so it's okay to sneak out. I went to the bathtub and let my clothes get soaked. I just sat there crying and hurting myself.
———————————————
I've been in here for hours now. Missed two classes today. And my arms are full of scratches. I sighed and sat up straight. I felt hot tears again, escaping my eyes.
"Y/n?" I looked over to my left and saw Malfoy, half naked. I quickly turn around and I felt my cheeks goes red. He quickly went in and distance his self.
There's a huge space between us and huge silence.
"You okay?" I heard him asked me, I looked at him and he was staring at me, I nodded and broke down immediately.
Suddenly I felt strong pair of arms wrapped around my body, and there I just leaned in his shoulders crying
"Do you know the reason why I smelled those?" I asked him quietly but clear enough for him
"Is it because you're broken?"
"No, that's what muggle smell when they are lovesick. For us muggles, love is a drug. It's addictive and abusive at the same time. I'm addicted to it and I let myself abuse me. I let them abuse me because I was desperate to love" I said between soft sobs. He tighten his hugged and snuggled into his neck
"Yeah. Love is a drug cause when I smelled the potions, I also smelled drugs together with your smell" He confessed, I looked at him and he pressed his lips against mine. My body reacted to it and I just kissed him back
We broke the kiss and he looked at me in the eyes and gently wiped my tears away
"I'm lovesick. Aren't you disgusted by that?" I asked him, and he let out a soft chuckle and tucked in my wet hair
"Why would I be disgusted by that? Also being lovesick is not a thing. It means that you're string enough to love and accept everything."
He kissed my forehead and hugged me "I'll give you time to heal properly, and I will help you with that cause I love you."
"Thank you Dray. Thank you." I said and snuggled to him closer
