It took them a few weeks before Historia and Ymir settled back into a comfortable norm again. Historia wasn't sure what happened that night when Ymir ran away after their fight but she was thankful that things were starting to get better.
"Wait," Historia said, pulling Ymir by the belt loop and picking off lint from her work uniform. "That's better."
Ymir stared at her, a little longer than intended and Historia could see the gears working in her head. Ymir was still a little antsy around Historia and Historia knew it was because of guilt. Ymir hadn't forgiven herself yet for those times she had treated Historia poorly. While Historia's already let go of their previous tensions, she could tell that the brunette was still trying to make it up in every way possible.
Historia met Ymir's gaze, the edge of her lips twitching into a smile. "Hey, it's okay, you know that, right?"
Ymir nodded, flushing lightly. "I-..yeah. I'm sorry."
It wasn't the first time Historia had heard her apologize. Ymir had been doing it frequently, for almost every little thing she did. Historia stood up on the tips of her toes and her lips brushed against Ymir's. "How many times do I have to tell you that there isn't anything to be sorry about?"
Historia already knew what Ymir had prepared to say but she watched as the brunette refrained from doing so. Ymir sighed, her shoulders slumping. "Probably a million times more."
"Then that's what I'll do," Historia kissed her softly. "I love you."
"I love you too," Ymir muttered hoarsely, her hands moving to cup Historia's face. Ymir's forehead leaned against hers. "I'll see you later today."
"I'll see you," Historia replied, pulling away and allowing Ymir to go. As she watched Ymir go, she still noticed how Ymir favored one leg over the other, it wasn't as obvious as before but it was still a subtle thing.
After doing proper healing up, Ymir had found herself a temporary job. Historia could see a lot of things storming inside Ymir that she could only understand. Their relationship had never been the easiest and there were still a lot of personal things they both had to do before their lives settled into some sort of domestic comfort.
…
"Your hair," Ymir mumbled, commenting on Eren's appearance as the two of them walked into a sandwich shop to grab lunch. Her shoulders felt heavy and it felt as if someone's hand was wrapped around her neck. Her eyes ached in tiredness that sleep couldn't defeat. Her brain felt overwhelmed with thoughts but also empty at the same time.
Eren raised a hand to press a lock of hair between his fingers. His hair had grown a little past his shoulder blades and he even had some facial hair starting to grow in. He didn't look bad, far from it but it was different compared to his usual clean appearance. "I wanted to try something new."
It had been a while since the two of them talked. While Eren knew about the accident Ymir was involved in, he didn't know the full details. The fact that Marcel and Zeke had a play into this. She couldn't decide if she should tell Eren about his brother's involvement. The thought of keeping another secret made an apprehensive feeling brew in her chest. She was tired of keeping secrets but right now wasn't a good time to tell him about it.
"Maybe I should try letting mine grow out too," She hummed around a sip of her drink. Ymir normally kept her hair up but it wouldn't be scandalous if she tried something that parted from her usual short haircuts. As they sat at a table, with their food in tow, Ymir couldn't help but appreciate the normality of their moment. While her eyes constantly ached and there was a feeling in her chest that she couldn't chase away, she enjoyed how simple it was. It felt as if it had been so long since she had such an experience.
"I encourage that idea," Eren said, his fingers tapping along the rim of the table before unwrapping his meal. "I've never seen you with long hair. I am sure Historia would love that. Probably go crazy for it, actually."
Ymir knew the implications he had in his words due to his tone but his suggestiveness wasn't enough to rile her up. Usually, she would already have a sharp reply ready but she just didn't have the energy. As they ate, she noticed Eren was staring at times in a similar way Ilse would when she evaluated people. When he got up to dispose of his wrapper, he came up from behind Ymir and took a grip on her shoulders. Ymir winced as his thumbs dug into her muscles and pulled away, giving him a pointed look but not saying anything.
"Wow, you're really tense," Eren went back to his seat and gave an even stare at his friend.
Ymir sighed and tried to glare, her thoughts drifting to her last conversation with Marcel. All her desires came at full force, her drive just to move forward, to get what she wanted and fulfill his request. Once you get your little girl back, I want you to leave this place. She just wanted her life to settle in some sort of domestication. She was tired of the problems, the conflicts, the drama, the stress. She was so tired of fucking up, so tired of starting over, so tired of losing and losing and-
"Sex. You need sex."
Ymir exploded. "What?!"
"Sex makes everything better, Ymir," Eren spoke all too casually making her bristle.
"I-...No, Eren, what the fuck," Ymir fumed half-heartedly. She still felt like she was being pulled downwards and just leaning forward with a heavy placement of her hands on the table wasn't as expressive as it should have been. "That's the last thing on my mind. I don't need-"
"Wait," Eren interrupted as his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. "You normally aren't like this when it comes to sex. How long has it been since you had sex? Historia and you still haven't done it? Have you even-," He actually faltered for a moment then lowered his voice. "Masturbated recently."
Ymir had a sudden and strong urge to lift a foot and kick him right in the crotch. Too bad she was too weary to do so. She lifted her head to the sky and laughed, almost a cackle, then hissed, "You're comfortable talking about sex so casually but you can hardly whisper 'masturbate'?" Her words earned a few curious and disturbed stares from the other customers around them but she didn't care. "You're warped, Eren Yaeger, absolutely warped!"
Eren grinned one of the most shit-eating grins that Ymir had ever seen. He shrugged and took a relaxed sip from his soda. "Hey, Mikasa and I still do it."
"I did not need to know that," Ymir snorted, crossing her arms and clenching herself in an almost insecure manner. "I did not need to know that at all."
"But seriously, how long has it been?"
Ymir huffed, wiping her face and pinching the bridge of her nose. He wasn't going to leave this alone, was he? "I don't know...a year, maybe?"
Eren choked. "You're kidding."
Ymir raised her face away from her hand and gave him a scowl. "I haven't exactly been in the best mental state for a while now."
"Obviously not if you haven't had sex for that long," He said but when Ymir didn't reply, he waved his hands in reassurance. "I'm joking! I get it, I do. It's just hard to imagine I guess...Mikasa and I-"
"Don't even finish that sentence," Ymir said, getting up from her seat and straightening her work uniform. Her workplace was closer compared to Eren's and she knew he had to get going before he was late. Though that seemed far from his concerns considering he kept commenting on Ymir's more...intimate life. "Go to your car, I don't want to see you ever again."
As they started walking, Eren took a hair tie off his wrist and started to put his hair up. "I'm sorry, but have you, you know, played with yourself? Recently?"
"Eren, you got to be fucking kidding me!" Ymir looked at him in disbelief and placed the palms of her hands on her temples. "I am not having this conversation with you!" She really wanted to kick him now.
"Okay! Okay!" Eren laughed, getting in his car. "Though, you should totally get around to having sex with Historia soon. At this rate, you two will be too old if you don't start now!"
…
Ymir
Historia. I'm killing Eren, don't tell Mikasa.
You
But then Mikasa will kill u :(
R u alright? What happened?
Ymir
Don't worry about it.
You
If u say so
Love u
Ymir
Love you too.
Historia looked up from her phone with a small smile as she heard her name being called. She had gotten a phone a few weeks ago after so long without one and she appreciated it. While Ymir didn't normally initiate a conversation or even give her more than one-word replies, Historia was glad she had another way to get into contact with her. Historia was surprised that Ymir had even texted her that. Whatever Eren did to rile her up like that, Historia appreciated it. It was almost like Ymir was her normal self again. Someone free from the weight of the troubles of their own life.
"Hey, Historia, can you help me replenish the condiments over here?" Sasha asked from nearby. Historia made her way around the counter and greeted Sasha with a nod. The woman had been put to easier tasks in the restaurant as time went on. Historia could tell Sasha's pregnancy was taking a toll on her as she was simply sweating at the effort of getting up and going around the tables to take empty containers.
Historia briefly wondered how it felt being pregnant but didn't entertain the thought all too much. She did curiously think about how Ymir, at once, was in the same condition as Sasha.
Historia and Sasha worked diligently in a productive silence. At the corner of her eye, Historia could see Sasha occasionally wincing and it caused concern. "Sasha, are you okay?"
She drew in a sharp breath. "N-never better."
Sasha's stressed state drew reasonable worry from Historia and she already had an idea of what was happening. Historia stood up and told her, "I'll get Nicolo."
"Wait," Sasha gasped out, grabbing her wrist. Her grip was tight and Historia had to fight the immediate instinct to pull away. The pressure applied was enough to send Historia in a familiar panic but she pushed it down. Now wasn't the time. "I...I-"
Historia saw the flicker of fear in Sasha's eyes. It curled Historia's stomach miserably and she made a sympathetic expression. She could almost feel the terror running through Sasha's body. The hesitancy. For a moment, all those months of being pregnant, of being happy and hopeful, flushing down the drain to be replaced by dread and doubt. But also in the same instant of anxiety, determination conquered Sasha's features. She gritted her teeth and closed her eyes. With a heavy breath, she said, "Get Nicolo."
Historia nodded and raced quickly to the kitchen, where the man was helping the busser clean the counters and place dirty dishes in their appropriate spot.
"Nicolo," Historia called out. He turned to her, unassuming, and gave a questioning quirk of his lips. "Sasha, she's-"
The blond didn't have to finish that sentence to see a switch flip in Nicolo's presence. His smile curved into a lopsided awkward frown and his eyebrows furrowed in the nervousness and worry of a husband and upcoming father. He knew what Historia was going to tell him before she could say it. He stalked forward, placing the restaurant's keys from his belt loop into Historia's hand.
"Finish up in here and close up the restaurant," Nicolo ordered, putting Historia in charge. Then, blowing air through his nose, he took off.
Historia stared dumbly at the keys in her hand before looking up at the busser. The young man grinned reassuringly at her and she offered a small smile in return. Guess she was in charge of the restaurant for now.
…
Ymir looked at her hand. She had started thinking about what Eren said after they departed. It actually triggered desires inside Ymir that she hadn't felt in so long. Her imagination was occupied with Historia in rather intimate situations.
Ymir's breath hitched, her face burning. No, no, no! Now definitely wasn't the time. She was home, of course, but she couldn't even consider trying to satisfy the feeling that was starting to build up inside her. Just imagine if she got caught in the act….by Historia. Oh god. All the ideas that sprouted in her head made Ymir squirm uneasily, making her feel even more embarrassed and guilty.
The click of the lock coming undone alerted the woman. Ymir jolted, her heart throbbing erratically in her chest. Hope for Historia was diminished as Ilse walked in.
"Oh, it's just you," Ymir mumbled, the sensation in her depleting but still present. Any idea she had was chased away and she was a little upset that Ilse decided to come home tonight instead of staying with Onyan.
"The one and only," Ilse replied, already heading in the direction of her room. When she noticed Ymir's expression, she waved a hand. "If it makes you feel better, I am only here to pick up one of my old laptops."
"I-...okay."
Ilse raised an eyebrow, her classic analytical look drifting over Ymir. Then, with a wrinkle of her nose, she said, "Gross."
"What? What's wrong?" Ymir asked, confused.
"You know what's wrong," Ilse went to her room then came back with an old backpack. Something she had used when she was a college student. She slung it around her shoulder and she grimaced. "If it's gonna get you to relax then go for it. Just don't do it on the couch."
Ymir flinched and a groan erupted from her throat. "Fucking great. First Eren and now you're saying shit."
"You're the horny one here," Ilse responded nonchalantly, earning a glare from Ymir.
"Go fuck yourself."
"Don't have to, I have Onyan," Ilse laughed, walking out the door. "But maybe you should take your own advice!" A beat later, Ilse continued. "Oh, hey, Historia."
Ymir shot up from the couch, her face flushing and she was very tempted to grab a pillow and scream into it. Her sluggish state from the past few weeks was, at this point, no more, and different feelings had started to emerge. As Historia walked in, Ymir settled herself quickly and offered a lopsided smile. "Uh, hi."
"Hello," Historia greeted easily. She showed no sign that she had heard Ymir and Ilse's brief exchange. Putting her stuff away, Historia said, "Sasha went into labor today."
That was enough of a distraction to chase away Ymir's current emotions. "Oh, damn?"
Historia nodded. "Yeah, Nicolo put me temporarily in charge to close the restaurant."
"That's nice," Ymir winced, feeling as if her input wasn't enough. She didn't want to sound like she didn't care. "I mean, it shows Nicolo trusts you enough. That's a good sign."
"Yeah," Historia smiled to herself. "Yeah, it really does." She looked at Ymir. "So, what's up with you? Anything interesting happen today?"
"No, not really," Which wasn't a lie. Nothing significant had happened. Ymir shrugged, showing that she didn't care. "Not like it matters. It's a temporary job anyway."
"Well, a little excitement isn't a bad thing."
The word excitement sent a tingle up Ymir's spine and that's when dread started to fill her head. She was going to be that person, wasn't she? Oh. Fucking. No. She shook her head and threw a thumb over her shoulder. "I'm-, I'm going to shower, is that alright?"
"Uh, that's fine," Historia furrowed her eyebrows with a quirk of her lips. "I don't mind."
"Good, I mean, thanks, uh, I'll go now," Ymir scampered off and got herself some clothes then locked herself in the bathroom.
"You idiot! You fucking idiot!" Ymir hissed, leaning against the door and slumping down. She hit her forehead a couple of times then took a deep breath. There was a more noticeable ache between her legs now and she wasn't comfortable about it. She's been aroused before. She's had sex before but there was something about Historia that made everything feel brand new. But Ymir was scared. She loved Historia and she accepted the fact that the blond probably wasn't ready for that sort of step in their relationship. Ymir's guilt weighed heavily in her mind. It wasn't Historia nor Ymir's fault. Things were just different for them compared to other relationships and there was an acceptance that accompanied them as they progressed through it.
Ymir could handle it. She was probably just freaking out because of her earlier conversations today. That's all. Everything would be fine.
…
Everything was not fine.
Mikasa didn't talk to Ymir about much. She didn't even mention the brunette's recent downward spiral when they got back into an exercise routine.
And while Mikasa was a person of few words, her actions weren't restrained like her voice.
Mikasa set Ymir on a more strict and difficult practice when it came to exercise. She made sure to push Ymir to her limit. Wake an hour earlier than usual, run the extra mile alongside her, lift a few more pounds, another set of reps before Ymir could take a break.
It wasn't like it bothered Ymir. In all honesty, she felt as if she deserved it. Everything Mikasa put her through and she couldn't help but think this was Mikasa's own way of expressing her disappointment.
But despite the blood, sweat, and tears Ymir was put through, the throbbing between her legs hardly subsided.
Ymir laid on the ground, her eyes squeezed shut and an arm over her face. Sweat dripped off her body, making her hair damp and an unpleasant smell sticking to her skin.
This time they had tried doing something new.
Boxing.
And while Ymir had some experience, she already knew she had no chance against Mikasa. Mikasa was extremely talented when it came to hand-to-hand combat so it wasn't long before Ymir was beaten far too many times than she could count while they sparred.
"I'm a disgusting human being," Ymir groaned, her body aching all over and not only because of the exercise.
Mikasa loomed over her, expressionless as ever. She offered with a lack of emotion, "You could do better."
Ymir sighed, the air leaving her chest like a tire pump. "Thanks."
Mikasa responded by offering a hand for Ymir to grab onto. Heaving the taller woman up, she gave an even stare then turned away. "I think that's enough for today."
Ymir slacked her shoulders and rubbed the back of her throat. Moving to gather her gym equipment and back her things, Ymir didn't face Mikasa as she said quietly, "I'm sorry."
There was a few seconds of silence and Ymir started to think that Mikasa hadn't caught her apology. It made the brunette feel a mixture of relief and anxiety before she got a reply. "I'm sorry too."
It was unexpected and Ymir couldn't confidently say that she understood. Ymir looked at Mikasa, rather dumbly before shifting her bag strap around her shoulder and preparing to ask, why?
"You're difficult, Ymir," Mikasa started, her cool expression wavering and she looked away for a second. "And if things were different, Eren and I would help you. But we can't-," Mikasa paused for a second and then met her gaze with a serious furrow of her eyebrows. "Because of Carly."
Ymir wouldn't lie and say that Mikasa's words stung, because they did. A lot. But Mikasa wasn't to blame.
The two of them were both mothers after all.
So Ymir understood why Eren and Mikasa weren't involved and Ymir didn't want them to be. It wasn't their responsibility, even if they were supposed to be Ymir's friends. Family, at this point. but there were differences in their lifestyles that kept them from being interconnected in each other's lives. Ymir didn't have a stable life, a satisfactory income, a house big enough for her and her own family. Not like the Yaeger family.
It's one of many things that divided them.
And Ymir would never blame the Yaegers for not being there. Because she wasn't their responsibility and Ymir was in control of her own actions.
Ymir was the fuck up and she knew she had to get her life together. For good. A life with her child and-
And Historia.
Ymir's features softened and she gave Mikasa a quick pat on the shoulder. "I get it. Alright?"
Mikasa blinked for a moment before gathering her stuff and going to her car. She didn't say anything and Ymir didn't mind. It was Mikasa after all. She was going to treat their moment like any other because she just wasn't one for emotions unless it involved her husband and child.
But Mikasa was still a good friend despite all of that.
Ymir hoped she knew that.
…
While Historia didn't expect it, it didn't go underappreciated as Ymir pulled out a chair, at the dinner table they were supposed to eat at, for Historia to sit down. She offered her thanks and gave a warm, honey-like, smile.
A dinner date.
And they definitely weren't dining at any ordinary restaurant. It was present in the fact that Ymir made sure that both of them were wearing formal attire. Not to mention the beautiful architecture, detailed designs etched on both the exterior and interior of the building they were in.
Historia's blue eyes drifted to admire everything around her, the beauty and elegance of it all. A professional musician played at a grand piano on a small stage for the customers to enjoy as they dined. The high-toned environment made Historia genuinely concerned.
She whipped her head in realization, pointedly looking at Ymir. "How...How could you afford this?"
Ymir looked to the side, scratching her cheek with one finger. "I, uh, I had some money saved up."
Historia frowned at her sentence. "Are you su-?"
"Historia, it's fine," Ymir quickly cut her off before the blond could finish speaking. She gave a lopsided grin. "I did this for you. You deserve it more than anything."
Historia flushed, backing down, and shifted in her seat. "You don't think this is a little too much?"
"Nothing is too much when it comes to you."
Wow.
Historia couldn't remember the last time Ymir had acted so cooly. How easily that reply slid out of her mouth reminded Historia of who Ymir was. The someone behind the weight of responsibility and stress. It was a reassurance but also a worry all at the same time. Ymir had been under a lot of pressure these past few months, due to circumstances that Historia would rather not think about at the moment. Though, the blond did notice that this past week, while Ymir still acted off, she was far more awkward than usual. Historia wondered if the awkwardness from the past week was just because of their upcoming date that Historia didn't know about until a couple of hours ago.
Staring at Ymir, Historia noticed there was still tension in her posture but Historia could tell the brunette was trying her best to relax. To be normal. So Historia decided she would give that in return. For tonight, they could forget about their troubles and be a couple.
"Sasha and Nicolo were able to take their son home last night," Historia mentioned as a waiter came to place a bottle of wine, glasses, and menus onto the table. "He's the cutest thing ever. Though, the restaurant's been a little quieter without its owners helping run the place."
"Geez, Cowgirl and Cowboy have a kid," Ymir mused, carefully pouring wine into both their glasses. "I know they will be good parents though. How's it been running the place on your own?"
"Busy. And in all honesty, it's hard to order the other employees around. I haven't been working as long as most of them. I don't think I really deserve it in the first place. Nicolo is obviously playing favorites, isn't he? That isn't fair to the others."
Ymir frowned and she shook her head. "You were put in charge during a very important moment for Nicolo. It wasn't like he had time to consider his options."
Historia looked away. "Maybe...but he texted me afterward to keep things steady. He wanted me to be in charge. Play manager, basically."
"It just shows how hard you work, Historia," Ymir reassured. Her eyes were soft and a comforting smile laid on her face. It was weird in a way. To have this sort of conversation and having Ymir there to comfort. It wasn't like Ymir hadn't done those things before but considering the subject and their words, it was a different moment altogether. It wasn't like Historia's situation was life-threatening or depressing. It was just simple doubts at the workplace. An ordinary conversation.
Historia won't mention that some of her work mindset came from the fact she had needed a distraction during Ymir's depressive episode. It wasn't necessary and things were changing. She would never blame Ymir for her work ethic and she understood that sometimes things like Ymir's accident happened. She could tell Ymir was actively making up for her previous and rather toxic set of mind. This date was probably one of her attempts of putting that part of their relationship behind them.
"I used to fantasize about being like him when I was younger," Historia said, looking past Ymir's shoulder.
Ymir looked up from her meal. They had already had a few conversations and grew a little quiet as the two of them focused on enjoying their food once it had been placed in front of them. One of Ymir's hands was resting on the table and her fingers drummed against the cloth as she turned around for a quick glance. Historia was talking about the professional musician who seemed lost in the songs he played on stage. His body moved fluidly along with the piano music and his passion radiated from every skillfully placed finger.
"A pianist?" Ymir turned back to Historia and her gold eyes danced over the blond. She took a bite from her meal and swallowed. "I could see that. Do you play?"
"I don't know if I remember anything. I started when I was a child," The memory was far faded and it was a past that seemed almost unbelievable. It was only for a month when she had taken lessons. It was when her father had very briefly taken her in before his parents chased Historia out. She could faintly recall how easy it was to lose herself while learning how to play. It had been after her mother died, she had only been six years old and the piano was a way to distract herself from the grief. "And if I remember correctly, you know how to play guitar. That night, for karaoke, you played at Nicolo's restaurant."
Ymir's lips twitched into a fond smile. "I...I, yeah. That was a night, huh?"
"We sang together."
"We did."
"You weren't that great but you were decent," Historia jokingly said.
"And you were amazing," Ymir shot back easily, sending an arrow straight through Historia's heart.
Historia laughed lightly with a blush. "Maybe if I knew a little more about the piano, we could have been an even better music duo."
Ymir chuckled and put a hand over her forehead, leaning onto her elbow. "And that song. Zero Eclipse? That was an amazing cover we did, right?"
Historia could feel everything in that memory as she recalled it. The raw emotion on stage between Ymir and her as their audience cheered them on. Historia felt warmth pool into her chest and she smiled tenderly. "We should do that again."
"Should we?"
"Why not?"
"Then next time. We'll do it next time."
By the time they were done, a full moon hung above them on a bustling street. Historia and Ymir walked side by side, burning some of the energy from their meal. Both were on the tipsy side, leaving them giggling at every word that was said by either of them. Every time Ymir tilted in to whisper something near Historia's ear, her breath would grace Historia's skin and draw excitement from somewhere deep inside her.
They stopped on a bridge that connected two walkways that both held a number of businesses that were making a profit during the busy weekend night. Historia leaned against the railing and looked at the calm river that cuts through this side of town. She couldn't help but notice that Ymir stayed away from the edge. Historia didn't blame her.
Historia admired the reflections of the lights on the river and she couldn't help but think about how pretty it was. She looked out at the distance, the river extending far from her sight. "Ymir."
"Yeah?"
"Were you nervous this whole week because of this date or was there something else on your mind?"
Historia could hear Ymir flinch at the question. "I-, oh, um…"
Historia didn't turn to Ymir. Historia took a deep breath, the night air filling her lungs. She loved the life around her. The people chattering around the streets and sidewalks. The warm glow of the store lights. The live music playing from some nearby restaurant. "You were nervous but not in a bad way, right? You just seemed more at ease this week than any of the ones before."
Even though Historia couldn't see her, Ymir nodded. "Yeah, I really wasn't nervous in a bad way."
Historia turned to face her girlfriend, her back using the railing as support. "Then what was it?"
She watched as Ymir's face turned red and the brunette waved her hands. "Ah, don't worry, it really wasn't important."
Historia moved to grab Ymir's hands and she squeezed them. Looking up with furrowed eyebrows, the blond said, "It's important to me." Her thumbs ran across Ymir's knuckles. "I-I just want us to be honest with each other. It's been nice to know that for once you're not worrying about-" About your mistakes. It's just so nice seeing you with confidence again, even if it's just a little.
"Oh, Historia," Ymir's eyes widened and she took a step back, pulling away from Historia's grasp. She spun away from the blond and covered her face with both hands. Crouching down for a moment, she groaned into her palms before facing the blond again with a flustered expression. "It's just...it's just-"
"It's just?"
"Historia, there's nothing wrong, it's embarrassing to say out loud though and I really don't want to weird you out or anything. I know our relationship isn't like others and I respect the pace we are going because I love you and I want you to feel as comfortable as possible-"
"That's sweet," Historia cut off Ymir's ramble before she could go any farther. "You're really sweet, Ymir. And I have no intention of judging you-"
"I WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!"
Oh.
Well, that definitely wasn't something Historia expected.
Ymir's cheeks were burning, she was practically on fire after blurting out that confession, and Historia wanted to take her seriously but
...
"Pfffttt," The sound came out of her mouth unintentionally and Historia had to cover her lips as she tried to suppress her laughter. Because wow.
Ymir was shuffling in place, her embarrassment present all over her body. Ymir clenched her jaw, looking away and muttering curses to herself.
Historia couldn't help but laugh even more. Just considering their environment, how better fitted it was for some heart heavy confession rather than that.
"I-...I-I am sorry Y-Ymir," Historia gasped out, trying to stop laughing. She grinned, staring at the brunette, and reached to grab her hand to pull her closer. "I'm not laughing at you I swear." Well, she was but just a little.
"Mm-hm," Ymir growled lightly, her eyes narrowed but her cheeks burned a bright red.
Historia leaned into Ymir, her forehead placed on Ymir's chest as she giggled then she lightly pushed the brunette away. "I wasn't expecting that, okay?"
"Obviously."
"Don't be like that," Historia tittered, just appreciating the fact that Ymir looked adorable in her flustered state. "It's alright. I don't mind. We're humans."
Ymir fidgeted with the collar of her shirt, not meeting her gaze. "I honestly expected a different reaction from you."
"Hmm? Like what?"
Ymir flushed without a reply.
And this time, Historia blushed because she knew exactly what Ymir was thinking.
After gaining both their composure and an awkward silence settling between them, Historia had time to process what just happened. The warmth that suddenly drenched her body was an excitement all on its own. It had been so long since she felt...she that way. It was a little frightening and a part of her wasn't sure how to react. She was afraid of suddenly entering an empty state the same way she did when Porco touched her. But Historia could trust Ymir. Unlike Porco, Ymir had never intentionally hurt her before.
She loved Ymir.
She wanted Ymir.
And as the brunette drove them back home, Historia accepted that truth and she welcomed it. Her whole body shuddered at the thought.
"Are we ready for that step in our relationship?" It was Ymir who asked. Her voice hoarse and barely a whisper which was sensuous to Historia. They were almost home at this point, any moment the car would stop and they would walk into their apartment.
Historia felt as if her throat was too tight to reply. She swallowed thickly and she wasn't sure if she could give one.
When they finally got home and entered their apartment, it took roughly a minute for Historia to make sure Ilse wasn't home before she let loose the storm brewing in the pit of her stomach.
Taking a grip onto Ymir, she pulled her in, kissing her with enough intensity to make both their knees buckle. Being able to feel Ymir's breath inside her, filling her lungs was something far better than the normal air she usually inhaled. Historia wanted Ymir in every way possible. Her body melted against the brunette's, her grasp on Ymir the only thing keeping her steady.
The freckled woman whimpered again Historia's lips, her tongue slipping into her mouth with hungry insistence. Ymir's flavor flooded her taste, sending a dizzy spell to be cast onto her mind. She didn't care though, continuing as she swam in a sea of euphoria. Her hands wandered, her fingers trembling but determined to get the brunette's clothes off. Historia could feel Ymir working her magic too. Ymir's fingertips left her skin on fire through her clothes as they made a desperate journey.
Historia left Ymir's mouth to latch her lips onto the crook of her neck. Ymir let out another whine making Historia shudder in satisfaction. Their feet started to move, she was aware that Ymir was leading them to their bedroom. She couldn't help but briefly amuse the fact that they weren't going to do it on the couch. Probably for Ilse's sake.
"Shit," Ymir gasped out as Historia successfully got Ymir out of her shirt and was halfway done with unbuckling the brunette's pants. Ymir's gold eyes were swollen with desire as she flushed red, keeping up with Historia's pace.
Historia's gaze drifted over her stomach and lingered when she noticed Ymir's taut abdomen. She had to thank Mikasa for forcing the brunette into an exercise routine.
Historia placed a palm onto Ymir's chest, pushing her down onto the bed and straddling her as she continued exploring Ymir's body. Her lips danced across her collarbone before she undid the brunette's bra and traveled down to the cleft of her breasts.
Historia hesitated for a moment and lifted her head to look at Ymir. The brunette's eyes were glazed but her focus returned when she realized that Historia was staring at her.
"What's wrong?" She asked, her eyebrows knitting together with concern. Her cheeks were still painted red but she shifted backward, managing to gently get Historia off her.
Historia shook her head and ducked down in embarrassment. She admitted, "I've...I've, uh, never actually done it with a woman."
Ymir's lips formed an "o" shape and she wrapped an arm around Historia and carefully brought her forward. Historia could feel her warm shaky breath against her skin. She leaned against Ymir, a hand placed on her shoulder and another on her thigh. Ymir's lips brushed against her ear.
"You can take your time," Ymir rasped, sending a shiver down Historia's spine. "I'm yours."
A crack of lightning struck beneath Historia's skin. Ymir was letting her have control. Letting Historia set the pace and do whatever she was comfortable with. Ymir was giving up her body willingly to Historia and that thought made Historia's stomach swarm with butterflies.
Her head dipped down and teased as her lips pressed against Ymir's shoulder, "I didn't think you would be this submissive."
It was a joke to ease the nervousness inside her and knowing Ymir was blushing with embarrassment was a little comforting. They were both anxious but excited.
Historia moved her other hand away from Ymir's thigh and slowly brought it to the waistband of her underwear. Her fingers drummed against skin before arching downwards to reach underneath and dive between Ymir's legs. Ymir's thighs immediately squeezed between Historia's hand in reflex before relaxing and allowing the blond to continue.
Historia's fingers were met with the warmth and stickiness of Ymir's excitement. The heat against her fingers was enough to encourage her to go further. She glided forward, easily finding Ymir's clit.
Historia stroked lightly against Ymir's bud, a whimper drawn out of her lips in response. "Oh, fuck."
Historia's fingers started to move lightly, the slight friction causing Ymir to shudder and attach herself to Historia. One of her hands moved to entangle itself with Historia's golden locks.
Picking up the pace, Historia worked rhythmically, her heart thumping in her chest as she took in Ymir's vulnerable state. The brunette's shallow breaths filled the silence in the room alongside the sound of Historia's fingers pushing against her heat.
Historia was kissing Ymir's neck fervently as Ymir started to buck her hips against the blond's fingertips. She could hear Ymir sighing with desperation and pleasure. Her voice was a haze inside Historia's head, fueling her passion. Historia nipped Ymir's neck in several spots, intentionally wanting to leave hickeys. Her tongue lashed out to ease the spots where she was a little rough on and was careful not to draw blood.
"H-Historia," Ymir's throaty groan filled her ears and she felt Ymir tense up against her palm.
Historia slowed down, the pressure on Ymir's clit alleviating. She pulled away from Ymir's throat, noticing that some of her marks were starting to appear. "Hm?"
Ymir's cheeks seemed to be permanently scarred with scarlet. Her golden orbs glazed and yearning. The corner of her lip twitched. "You know...you're a little overdressed."
"Mmhmm," Historia hummed, blowing air through her nose with amusement. "Maybe if someone wasn't being too horny, they would have gotten these clothes off of me."
Ymir's fingertips traveled alongside Historia's hips and underneath her shirt. Considering how quickly she was able to unhook her bra reminded Historia that Ymir was more experienced in these sorts of things. Historia helped peel off the rest of her clothes. Once they were both exposed, Historia couldn't help but break her confidence and hug herself, hiding her breasts.
"I think it's fair now," Ymir teased, probably in revenge for Historia's earlier remark.
Historia blushed deeply but leaned forward, bringing a hand back down between Ymir's legs. "We're not done yet."
"Ahh," Ymir cried out in surprise but was quick to silent herself as Historia inserted a finger.
Historia was going off her own experience of touching herself to pleasure Ymir. She was nervous and afraid of hurting the brunette but Ymir quivering against her was enough reassurance to know she was doing something right. Slowly, she entered a second digit and brought her thumb to Ymir's clit. She moved her hand carefully at first, getting used to the feeling before she found herself in a steady rhythm.
Heat encased her fingers and the slickness of her arousal started to spill onto her palm. Her blue eyes rested on Ymir's features, watching the brunette lose herself to pleasure. Delight spilled in her chest and desire swelled in her eyes as she watched Ymir start to work with Historia's hand. It wasn't long before Historia felt pressure claim her diligent fingers, her thumb increasing friction against Ymir's clit and pumping deeper into the brunette. Ymir's hands moved to grip the sheets, her eyebrows furrowing as small moans of pleasure rippled out. Her legs suddenly clutched around Historia and she felt the brunette's muscles flex violently before quivering as she started to climax.
"H-Historia," Ymir managed to gasp out as she cried out in a release of tension. The blond felt a shiver roll down her spine and she moved to press her lips against the brunette's shoulder as Ymir climbed down from her orgasm.
As her lover started to steady her breathing, Historia pulled her fingers out and slowly brought them to her lips, taking a purposeful taste of Ymir's arousal. Ymir looked at her through narrowed eyes, her gold orbs glazed. She exhaled heavily, "Fuck."
"Mmm," Historia smirked, leaning to press her lips against Ymir's, swiping a tongue along her lips.
Ymir returned the kiss and Historia allowed her control and felt Ymir carefully flip their positions. Historia felt the comfort of the mattress pressed against her back and Ymir's teeth tugging at her earlobe before brushing the side of her neck and down to her collarbone. She felt the purposeful puncture to her skin and quick ease with a glide of her tongue as the brunette made an intention to leave her own markings on the smaller woman.
Eventually, Ymir traveled lower, her lips brushing against the delicate skin of her abdomen and a thumb running along a hardened nipple before Ymir's hands moved to grip Historia's hips. Historia inhaled sharply with anticipation as Ymir's lips lightly traveled along her thighs.
The eventual pause of teasing made Historia realize that Ymir was silently waiting for permission. Her head tilted to look at Ymir who was looking back up at her with an intense gaze. The ferocity in her features sent a ripple of arousal along Historia's body. Her fingers moved to dance along the nape of Ymir's necks before entangling themselves with Ymir's hair and nudging her slightly as a signal of permission.
It was like dynamite was ignited the moment Historia felt the warmth of Ymir's mouth between her legs. An expert flick of the brunette's tongue caused ecstasy to consume her body. Historia whimpered with pleasure, arching her back to bring more friction as Ymir's tongue lashed out on her clit. Goosebumps formed along her body and her head was swarming with a symphony of bright lights as her lover worked their magic.
"Y-Ymir!" Historia called out, tugging on her lover's hair. Every movement of Ymir's tongue broke her down and rebuilt her up again. Elevating her among an atmosphere of exhilaration before she reached the highest point and her heart skipped a few beats. The pulsating of blood didn't drown out her moans of pleasure as she reached her climax. Bright lights blinded her with euphoric visions.
Her body quaked against Ymir and when the brunette moved away, she was vaguely aware of the absence between her legs. When her heartbeat finally evened, Historia shakily positioned herself to sit up.
Ymir met her gaze, her golden orbs raw with emotion, and she moved forward to cup Historia's face with both hands. Her touch was like flames during a winter night. Ymir kissed Historia tenderly and Historia heard her mutter an apology against her lips.
Historia pulled Ymir forward, hugging her closer, and ran her fingers along the back of her neck. She kissed her softly and lovingly with all the warmth she could offer.
"I love you, Ymir."
Ymir slid her palms along Historia's arms and intertwined their fingers. She stared at her with a seriousness in her features and a promise in her tone. "I love you too, Historia."
They sat there for maybe a minute before the intensity of Ymir's expression eased away and the brunette said something else, with a lopsided grin and a flush to her cheeks. "Thank you."
Laughter tickled the back of Historia's throat. "You're welcome."
…
AN: I APOLOGIZE FOR THE DELAY! Please forgive me, November was a very hectic month but the beginning of December has been no better. Thank you to everyone who has read/reviewed/favorited/followed, it means the world to me. And since you guys are so patient with me, expect a new chapter very soon.
Until then, Zouboss
