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Thinking

Biju, etc. speaking

Biju, etc. thinking

Emphasis


Sexist idiots - particularly ones as horrible as the civilian council members, not to mention the "Elders" who were straight off the scale, even with one being a retired Kunoichi… Once the Leaf's Kunoichi force found out the plans for Naruto Uzumaki? Hatake, Kakashi reassured himself, they would be on her side and dare any shinobi or civilian to say otherwise. He couldn't help but think that the bulk of shinobi would be undividedly upset regarding Uchiha Sasuke's attack on her, too.


"Shikamaru!" Naruto ran up to her brother-figure who was lying on the ground watching the clouds; Choji was next to him eating chips. She had noticed Sakura upon arriving on the training grounds; the pink-haired girl was whispering to Ino but Naru paid her no mind. "I thought you said you weren't lazy."

Shika sat up quickly - well, quickly for a Nara - and glared at her. "You've got a lot of nerve…"

"Don't even! I'm tired and already dealing with this," her hand gestured back toward the two ninken following her. Pakkun scratched his chest and looked bored, while Bull tried to hide his enormous form behind the nearest tree, then peeked out from behind it. Naruto shook her head. Bull was too darn cute, but having them following her around was a pain.

"Why are they…? Never mind. Dad told me what happened last night," Shikamaru popped his back and moaned. "I tried contacting you over and over." He lifted up Naruto's hair and looked at her ears only to find that she wasn't wearing their communication earrings. "Where did you put them now?"

Naruto looked away from Ino who was carefully watching their interaction. She had offered her a smile, then looked down in embarrassment. "Lost one in the shower." Shikamaru scoffed at her. "It's not totally my fault, HE wanted to see them and I guess I didn't screw it back on tightly afterward, ya know? We were having a…" Naruto groaned and closed her eyes. "Debate. Yeah, a debate."

Shikamaru watched as his little sister shook her head in what was obviously annoyance. "Not a debate in the shower, right?" Choji choked on his chip and Ino came forward, looking confused. Confused but angry?

"Alright, I can't STAND it! What is your deal, Uzumaki?"

"Do what? Ino-chan, what are you talking about?" Naruto replied.

"I'll tell you what I'm talking about! First, you say that you don't like Sasuke-kun," Ino ignored Naruto's eyes roll in exasperation, "...then I see how tight you are with Lazy Bones here, and now you're… Showering with someone else?" Her face was pink with embarrassment before she turned deadly serious. "Is it Sasuke-kun? And are you really marrying him?!"

Naruto felt the bile come up in her throat and tried to swallow it down but finally had to spit up in a nearby bush. She came back toward Team 10 as she furiously shook her head, taking a sip of water, swished it around in her mouth before spitting it out. She took a long drink as she looked to see what turned out to be the blank face of Shikamaru, concern from Choji, then glared at Ino. "Hell no! You've got to be messing with me, Ino-chan. I told you before that I really don't like that guy AT ALL." Naruto lowered her voice and there was sadness or at least a bit of despair in it, Ino noted. "Bastard attacked me, so he's lucky I don't hate him now." Ino didn't look surprised, which was weird considering all her questions. "BUT… He's my teammate, and you know how the Leaf relies on teamwork." Naruto's face twisted up at the word before she continued. "Bastard," she said darkly. "And what's this marrying crap?"

Ino let out a little huff. "Forehead was here ranting about it. I didn't believe her at first, but she was really angry. She said she had an 'in' with someone who gave her the intel." The girl watched Naruto's eyes meet Shikamaru's. Interesting. "So, you and Shika, ne?" Shikamaru coughed loudly while the other blonde looked at her blankly.

"What?"

"HELL no, Ino! She's like, my little sister!" Shika's hands were on his head and Naruto wanted to laugh at his horrified expression: now she understood Ino's dumb question. "No - she IS my imouto: she's been living with me for years!"

Choji nodded before putting another chip in his mouth, looking up at Ino's scandalized expression, and chuckled. He passed a chip to Naruto before offering one to Shikamaru. Ino never took them, so he didn't offer her any this time. He was glad she was no longer on a diet but couldn't understand how the blonde could resist the ultimate treat. Oh well: more for me.

The next half hour was filled with more questions from the Yamanaka who could not believe she hadn't been informed that Uzumaki Naruto might as well be a Nara Naruto, especially as her father apparently knew the whole time! Naruto tried to make Ino at least wary of the last (un)loyal-ish Uchiha, while Shikamaru was adamant about keeping Ino away from him. Choji only listened but finally laid his head back on the ground, looking up at the clouds with his buddy. Ino finally had enough and stomped back to her family's floral shop.

"Troublesome." Naruto and Choji nodded in agreement.

"Where's your smokestack of a sensei? I can barely smell his pollution," Naruto began.

Together the boys chorused, "Emergency council meeting."

"Really? I didn't know Asuma was on the council!" The guys both nodded at her. "Ugh: sucks to be him." She realized her husband's ninken had dispelled and felt relief.

Shikamaru noticed that as well and wondered just how bad things were. "Hai, this morning he was at the house and said something about the Sandaime forcing him to take the Clan Head position. I guess he's either been avoiding it or hasn't needed to be there before now." He groaned, taking a good look at his fairly oblivious sister. After what had just taken place between Naruto and Sasuke, it was only a matter of time before the council stuck their fat heads into her business. Not wanting to worry her more he asked the one question he both hated and knew Naruto would love. "Wanna spar?" Of course, the woman was on her feet immediately. "Troublesome blonde."

He took his time getting up while Naruto bounced around excitedly going through her odd mixed-form katas. Choji stretched and agreed to join, and mentioned that their sensei was surprised to be sent to the meeting today: they had planned on grabbing a late lunch as a team or maybe even go on their first mission. Fortunately, Naruto didn't catch on; Shikamaru was only going through this troublesome exercise to keep her from fretting over the probably ongoing council meeting. Kami knows she'll have enough worries, later on, knowing how troublesome and empty-headed the council is.


When Kakashi arrived at the Hokage Tower, he was glad to find he wouldn't be walking into the council meeting alone. Asuma Sarutobi had greeted him outside with a troubled face as he blew smoke at him, then told him that he was taking up the Sarutobi Head position for the first time today, just as Kakashi was for his clan. He dreaded walking into the room, though. He followed Asuma and had to force himself to retain his lazy bearing as he saw his clan insignia hanging on the wall. I haven't seen it in years. Fortunately, it was between the Akimichi and Sarutobi banners. He knew both clan heads well and was thankful to have a seat at that wretched table between the two kind men. He felt fairly sure that the Ino-Shika-Cho formation all knew about his marriage. I hope! The men definitely knew about the Uchiha's attack on his little wife.

Looking around the room, Kakashi saw the three men huddled in a corner, whispering to one another with an air of deep concern. He and Asuma sat down heavily after the younger Sarutobi reluctantly put out his smoke. Asuma smacked him in the shoulder jovially and challenged him to a janken-pon match. Kakashi told him to "fuck off," then cleared his throat at the glare he received from Nara Yoshino. He had been too concerned about what would take place here, not to mention being entirely uncomfortable in this blasted council room to notice them before Asuma pulled a Gai. He was probably trying to calm me down. Fuck. I'll take him out for a drink later. Kakashi appreciated the friend he'd known since before his toddler days, but one Maito Gai was enough!

The Sandaime was still not in attendance, thankfully neither were the elders nor civilian side of the council. Is it always like this? The Hatake observed the clan insignias and their order, which were all on his side of the room. Nara, Yamanaka, Akimichi, mine, Kakashi groaned out loud: he really didn't want to be here - there was a good reason he never took up his seat aside from being the lone Hatake until recently. Sarutobi, Inuzuka, Aburame, Hyuuga… The next flag was offset, and he wondered which clan's insignia had previously been there, considering the sun-bleached wood there had definitely been another clan that was no longer being represented. Senju, Uchiha: he knew those two last seats would be vacant today, just as they had been for years. You had to be at least 16 to be on the council - that was in the village's original charter. His brat student was too young, and his brother - well, the brat's brother was his clan's slaughterer. What happened to you, Itachi?

Nara Yoshino sat down in the Nara Clan Head seat, and wasn't that interesting? She had been a Chunin before having her child, Kakashi knew. To his knowledge, in order to be on the shinobi council, one had to be listed as active duty, so he could only guess that she just wasn't being called for missions. The Hatake Clan Head stopped his tapping fingernails and Asuma snorted at him. He glared at his friend then watched Commander Nara pat his wife's shoulder gently. At least I'm not the only one nervous here. Ibiki walked into the room and looked apologetically at Inoichi, who rolled his eyes playfully. Most wouldn't be able to read the head of the torture side of T&I well, but Ibiki was a friend of Minato-sensei, and he'd known the man his entire life. Suddenly Kakashi felt his stomach churn.

"Tell her goodbye for me," he whispered to the man beside him, who had just resumed smoking. Asuma knew who "she" was but had no idea what the Hatake was on about now. Seeing his obtuse look, Kakashi sighed heavily. Every shinobi that would be in this room was a friend - most were close friends - of his sensei. He looked around lazily and moved closer to the Hokage's son. "They'll be avenging her honor for sensei," he whispered heatedly into the Sarutobi's ear. The jerk had the nerve to laugh heartily at him.

Other clan heads marched in, all looking glum - aside from Hiashi who had that Hyuuga I'm-better-than-all-of-you-combined face and stride of his… Tsume Inuzuka patted Kakashi's head as she walked to her chair alongside her ninken, giving him a wink. Kakashi chastised himself: he had darted his head away from the woman, just like he did when he was a boy. Asuma laughed and quietly told him to relax, only to get his beard pulled by Chouza Akimichi - who made a ridiculously goofy face at the both of them. It was only then that Kakashi realized just how much younger he and Asuma were than everyone else. Judging from Asuma's expression and pale face, it looked like he saw it as well. Finally, the Hokage walked in, looking pleased as he slapped down papers in front of his chair at the end of the table.

"Let's get this show rolling before the ass-" The Hokage stopped his sentence and his shoulders sagged as the civilian side of the council filed in. "Speak of the devil and he will arrive," he muttered. The elders had just made their way in, too. "First order of business, the Chunin exams will take place in our village in two months…"

Kakashi listened as the civilians - it seemed they were all greedy merchants - asked for one ridiculous thing after another, hoping to gain business over their competitors. He had to hand it to the Sandaime: he took it all in stride, stressing the need for community and whatnot, refusing their whims. The Hatake Clan Head winced as a particularly loud green-eyed woman argued about something he had no interest in and wondered if her hair was naturally that ugly color. Surely they don't make a dye that color? He snorted internally. At least it wasn't as bad as the guy next to her. Imagine being a man with neon pink hair?! It was even pinker than his female student's!

He watched Asuma begin to take notes on some topics that followed and might have done the same but none of the other shinobi members were doing it. The Sandaime probably forced him to take notes. They were elite shinobi: it wasn't like they were forgetful, plus he always felt that seeming a little out of it made those around underestimate one's skills - or made others avoid me entirely. He smiled to himself at that thought, then fisted his hand to avoid pulling out his beloved book. He saw Asuma's hand twitching ever more violently: he must be craving a cigarette. It made sense, it had probably been over 10 minutes since the Hokage made him toss the one he had. Doesn't seem fair: the Hokage's still smoking his pipe! Kakashi certainly wouldn't say anything. There were obvious perks to being a leader, and he was also glad Asuma's addiction wasn't currently assaulting his sensitive nose quite so badly.

Hiruzen reshuffled the papers in front of him. "I'd like to announce that I am promoting Ibiki Morino to the Head of the Department of Torture and Investigation. Congratulations, Ibiki-kun!" Ibiki didn't look one bit happy about his promotion, but then again the man never did look happy.

"Finally! I get to retire to my flower shop!" Inoichi went on waxing nostalgic, giving his teammates grief that they couldn't retire soon, but Kakashi didn't believe it for one second. No, looking around the room he saw the Sandaime's game, but he still didn't have the numbers to win. Sarutobi had brought in all of the shinobi he could get to have as many votes as possible if the council and/or elders went against him.

No person could have two votes. The Jonin Commander and Head of T&I got to vote on council matters, but it just so happened that they were also clan heads. In his position, the Hokage couldn't hold the Sarutobi Head seat, so Asuma was sent in to be an extra vote, just as the Nara Matriarch had taken her clan's council seat to obtain another tally in the Hokage's favor. Finally, Ibiki was able to vote because of his new position, and Inoichi could still vote as the leader of his family. The shinobis' combined vote wasn't enough to overrule the will of the civilians and elders, but now it was closer. If I was in charge, there's no way I'd allow this ratio of civilians to shinobi in the council! Not that the silver-haired man would ever take on the role of Hokage - but to allow civilians to rule over shinobi in a shinobi village? It was just insane.


Over two hours later, he was still there dealing with council bullshit. Kakashi let out a groan, but cleared his throat, hoping to cover it. He now wanted to take a nap even more than read, and Asuma had an unlit cigarette that he was now chewing. Just as the Hokage began to rule for dismissal, Danzo spoke. "There is extremely important, urgent business which you have failed to discuss with either your advisors or this council, Hiruzen." The civilians bristled at this, but the Hokage knew that it was somewhat of an act. Normally when Danzo was trying to override him, The Warhawk would easily lead the idiots into a near-feral state.

"Isn't that interesting." Hiruzen really wanted to jutsu his old friend into the afterlife, but knew doing such a thing would only add to his paperwork, especially with his friend's supposedly secret army which would do Gods-only-knew-what if Danzo were to die. Minato, you bastard: leaving me with this shit. That thought was beginning to become his mantra as of late. "And at the very end of our meeting. Say what you will, Danzo," he said sourly.

"I am speaking of our jinchuuriki," Danzo waited for the ruckus he desired, enjoying the chorus of so many of his bootlickers whispering "demon," "monster," along with a few death threats thrown in. Life was good when he acted as the orchestrator of the blind mob, even though he was furious with Hiruzen for allowing Minato and Kushina's spawn the allowances he had. The civilians were nearly as loyal to him as ROOT members and easily riled. He was pleased to see that even some of the shinobi in the room reacted uncomfortably to the blonde hellion's title being raised. "I want her marriage to Jonin Hatake Kakashi annulled immediately."

To say that chaos reigned down would be an understatement. As soon as Kakashi realized the Sandaime's summon, Enma, was in the room, he reached his hand under the table and summoned his pack. Kuromaru, Tsume's constant companion was already on the table barking at the civilians, who were nearly comedically screaming jibberish, shaking their fists, and pointing at him angrily. He didn't see a jutsu thrown, but something was keeping most of the paper that had been anywhere on the table or near it in the air. He allowed Bull to jump up beside the Inuzuka ninken, and together they were terrifying enough to stop the madness. Looking at Danzo's smug face, he realized that the old bastard probably gave his civilian minions directions to shout and scream, but only for a certain time period. He wondered to himself if he had ever felt the itch to Chidori someone as badly as he did now, and focused his racing chakra away from his hand.

"I also demand to know WHY your son and Jonin Hatake have been allowed to take seats on the council!" Just as he additionally demanded proof of Ibiki's promotion, Danzo had Enma, in bo-staff form in his face.

Hiruzen Sarutobi stood in all his glory, chakra crackling. Nowhere in sight was the kindly old grandfatherly-figure: that persona had been replaced with the veritable God of Shinobi, who slowly growled out, "Remember well, Danzo: I am the Hokage; you are not. I lead this village, and ALL it's citizens. Including that little army you believe you've hidden. Do I make myself clear?"

Danzo only glared right back at him with his one eye, before his face fell back into a blank mask. It seemed he would have to bring up the demon's attack on the last Uchiha, that insubordinate little shit - so unlike his brother - at another time. Soon, very soon. The Jinchuuriki would be his tool. He would make her into a great weapon for the time being, then dispose of her after she supplied ROOT with enough red-eyed children of Uzumaki descent to house the Kyuubi... One after another if needed, until he had what would be the absolute perfect weapon. It was all for the Leaf: he would be their ultimate savior as well as their Hokage.