31
Surprises
"Does Bones know you're here?"
"With respect," Lizzie knew she was going to say something not-so-respectful, "Why does it matter if he knows or not?"
Kirk cleared his throat, "Er, well he is your CO and umm..."
Lizzie had never seen the Captain without words before.
"Captain, does this matter concern Doctor McCoy?"
"Not explicitly."
"Am I not capable of communicating with you myself?"
"Yes, but—"
"Does the subject I communicated to you raise the need for Doctor McCoy to be present, or any other member of staff for that matter?"
"No," Kirk looked almost uncomfortable at Lizzie's logical argument.
"Then, I would request that we keep this meeting private. If I feel it is relevant that Doctor McCoy is informed he will be so. If you feel it is necessary under protocol, then so be it."
"Very well, Lieutenant. Feel free to continue," Kirk was back on top, easy manner to boot.
Despite her exterior show of confidence and control, inside Lizzie was trying to hold it all together, feeling distinctly uncomfortable at the way she'd addressed the Captain. She did, however, feel justified. She was the one who'd requested the meeting and she was the main topic. Not McCoy.
So, why should McCoy be present? I'm more than capable of flagging anything he needs to know.
Trying to set the wriggling doubt out of the way, she continued with Kirk.
"It's come to my attention that, having had such a long absence, I'm quite behind on what's going on with the ship. I've next to no idea where we've been the last few weeks, or where we're going. Please could you give me a run down?"
Kirk frowned at her request. He'd been right, this was something Bones could have sorted.
"Couldn't you have asked Bones?"
Lizzie bit back her exasperation at the Captain's persistence, replacing it with desperation.
"I would have, but," it was her turn to hesitate. Did she really want the truth anyway? The whole truth?
"I feel that McCoy may withhold certain pieces of information he views as potentially…damaging. And," she added carefully, "that's not the only thing I'm here for."
The Captain surveyed her, it felt like he could see all her intentions.
"Alright. What exactly is it you need?"
"I need to know what happened when I returned to the ship. I don't remember much." Lizzie closed her eyes before quickly reopening them.
Kirk seemed to understand her need to know, "You were brought back by transporter by Spock, Bones and me. In the transporter room you, ah, ran out, McCoy found you somewhere on Deck Twenty-Two."
Kirk seemed to trigger a blurred recollection accompanied by a rather cold feeling. Lizzie vaguely recalled the cupboard, but she couldn't remember getting there. What she did well remember was, during her extended stay in sickbay, McCoy bemoaning her having found the cupboard furthest from sickbay. But Lizzie hadn't really had the energy to fight him, or tell him that she had very little idea of what he was talking about.
"So that's what he was going on about," Lizzie muttered over Kirk.
Kirk paused when she spoke before carrying on, "Spock and I took security teams to investigate the rest of the planet. That's where we found Stills, Mercier and Sanders."
Lizzie felt the consuming stab of betrayal at the mention of Lauren's name, quickly followed by the confusion of feeling associated with Sanders. She'd missed a considerable amount of what Kirk had said, but she knew these events roughly, she just wanted to hear them again.
"We then dropped off the passengers and prisoners to the Starbase. We conducted an investigation into what took place on Trouvadore, but that's still partially ongoing. We received new orders and we spent nearly a week investigating a crop of solar flares—"
"Wait!" Lizzie was focussed on the dropping off of passengers, "Did you drop off Stills?"
Kirk was hard pressed to find a reason not to tell her everything. He felt like he owed it to her, given that she managed to escape from a kidnapping. Twice.
"O'Neil, I can't tell you everything."
"I don't need everything. I just need something."
It was the first time Lizzie showed how starved for information she truly was. Curiosity had set in and began to feed on her. She'd hidden it from everyone, but now she needed to know. She needed to know why her.
Kirk ran a hand through his hair, "Well, Stills is still being dealt with."
His dodge was good, but Lizzie was shrewd.
"She's still on the ship isn't she?" In the silence her eyes bore into Kirk, "Isn't she?"
He didn't see the point in trying to hide it from her anymore. "Yes, Stills is still on the ship."
The door to his ready room buzzed and she wiped her expression blank as he called for it to open.
"I've got people spewing all over sickbay, Spock, I don't have time for your nonsense. Now move out of my way or I'll stick you with—"
"Doctor, once again I find your threats irrelevant."
McCoy stormed past the Vulcan and into the ready room, confronted by Kirk and O'Neil.
"Lizzie? The hell's going on in here?"
She wanted to bury her face in her hands. It was never going to end. She was never going to get her answers.
Lizzie looked at Kirk waiting to take his lead, but he sat watching her as she watched him. They all stayed there, Spock and McCoy watching the two engaged in a staring match of sorts. Lizzie realised he was waiting for her, she'd made her wishes clear, he was giving her the choice.
"Well? Is anybody in? Or am I gonna have to lock you all up in sickbay and declare you mentally incapacitated?"
"I hardly think that's going to procure—"
"Shut it!"
Lizzie broke from Kirk's gaze and looked at McCoy while addressing Kirk. "He may as well know, you'd probably only tell him later anyway."
"I wouldn't do that, you asked me not to."
"Well he's here now. I've worked with him long enough to know that he's not just going to give it up."
"He is right here, and waiting for an answer." The Doctor was clearly in a grump.
Spock had subtly closed the door, but Lizzie noticed, "Thank you, Mr Spock."
Spock inclined his head slightly to Lizzie.
"What are you two—out with it!"
"McCoy sit down before you give yourself a heart attack." Lizzie was too tired to try and talk him down off the edge. Spock hovered by the door, apparently unsure if the invitation was extended to him. Lizzie looked pointedly. "May as well join us Commander, with the present company we may well end up requiring a mediator."
Spock's lips lifted almost imperceptibly, betraying his amusement at Lizzie's quip towards the two other men. He took a seat beside her.
"Well?!" Lizzie wasn't sure whether McCoy could disconnect his eyebrow from his forehead, but it receded well into his hairline. "You gonna be explaining or not?"
Lizzie let out a sigh. This had been far from her intention. She now had three COs sitting in an office with her. It was beyond what she had expected to have to handle, and she found herself struggling to bottle the anxiety.
"I've just been trying to clear up some events from the past few weeks."
McCoy frowned even more deeply. "And? I could've done that with you, why him." He jabbed his thumb in Kirk's direction.
"Hey, I am actually the Captain of this ship."
"Yeah and that really shows sometimes."
Lizzie put her head in her hands, if they wanted to scrap, they could help themselves, the less attention on her the better.
"Bones, it's my job to look out for my crew."
"I'm her CO, so what was it that I can't handle?"
Although she didn't want the attention, she also didn't want to have to listen to their fight indefinitely.
"Nobody said you can't handle it. They just—"
"They just what?"
"Bones this is ridi—"
It had gone on long enough. Lizzie whistled a clear level pitch, gaining their attention. Beside her Spock raised an eyebrow slightly.
"Hey. I'm your problem. Which was what I was trying to avoid. So how about we have an actual conversation?"
The two opposite her sat stunned and merely nodded at her suggestion.
"Grand. Now. For the newcomers: I believe we'd just had a conversation about what's taken place since I got back on the ship from my lovely visit to the planet Trouvadore. Then just as we reached a hitch in our conversation about Lauren Stills was when you came in. Good? Glad that's sorted."
McCoy had calmed suitably by now, his jabs at Jim seemingly having done the trick at easing his frustrations. He looked slightly mistrustful, almost unsure what to make of the situation, "What about Stills?"
"I think I'd just found out that she was still on board the ship?"
Kirk nodded, eyes slightly narrowed as if trying to predict what would come next.
"Well. Before you entered I think my next question was going to be, "What's going on?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, Captain. She's still on board, but she's not working and she killed a man. So I'm guessing she's not just sitting in quarters watching a holovid." Calm and to the point, Lizzie was adamant it was something she needed to know, "So what's happening?"
Kirk looked to the other men. McCoy looked out of his comfort zone, Lizzie almost felt sympathy, before recalling that he elbowed his way in to the situation, so he'd just have to deal with the consequences like an adult. Spock merely sat statuesque.
"Stills is in the brig with Mercier."
Lizzie blinked as it registered.
She'd been so focussed on Lauren, she barely remembered Mercier. She hadn't clocked till just now that he had been involved, she'd failed to register who he actually was. She cast her mind back to events that had taken place months before, Lizzie had foiled his plan to practically kill his girlfriend. There was something else skirting her memory.
On the shuttle, idiot, when they strapped you to Sanders it was Mercier who nearly gave you a collapsed lung for your troubles.
She could almost feel the searing crack of bone in her chest.
"Lizzie?"
She looked up, she'd barely heard it, but she knew who was talking based on the address.
"Yes, Leonard?"
She blushed at the slip, having temporarily forgotten the situation. But neither of the others acknowledged it. The angry man of five minutes earlier was gone.
"Is everything okay?"
His eyes searched her face, she tried to hide her thoughts from his gaze.
Now's not the time for that, Len. You can do that at any other point.
"Yes, I was just recalling something."
Kirk was quick to ask, "What?"
Lizzie was mild, "Being in the shuttle."
McCoy practically bristled with suppressed rage. Only Spock remained unaffected by anger.
"Sorry, I just hadn't associated some of the facts. Anyhow, if they're still in the brig, can I speak to her?"
The three stared straight at her. If the situation hadn't been so serious it would have been comical. Spock's eyebrow was far higher than usual, McCoy practically had his mouth open in shock and Kirk was once again rendered speechless.
Lizzie waited as Kirk and Spock exchanged glances while McCoy continued to look at her.
"Lieutenant, I am unsure that such a decision would be wise."
McCoy was staring harder now and Lizzie found his gaze distracting.
"Commander, I feel that—"
"O'Neil, I can't let you in there."
"Captain, I think that it would be—"
Kirk was firm, "Lieutenant, it goes against every protocol."
"Captain, in the interests of transparency, I believe O'Neil has a right to all the facts."
Spock gave the Captain an indecipherable look that only he could understand.
Kirk conceded, "Fine Spock, continue."
At his gesture Spock took the lead. McCoy continued his analysing stare.
Spock leaned on the table fingers bridged, "Lieutenant. While you were still confined to sickbay, ongoing investigations led us down multiple different routes with different theories, as at the time there was little evidence to suggest what had really occurred. It was at this time that interviews of crew members, captured individuals and slavers alike were made. These led us to the conclusion that it was indeed Crewman Stills who had organised your capture.
"There are still some answers that we do not hold, but it is likely that the code blue in your laboratory was initiated by Mercier who had previously gained access to the ship. It was he who deployed the bulkhead in the Jeffries tube, splitting you from the other members of the crew. He was also responsible for deactivating lighting throughout the ship and a number of technical errors, making escape possible without detection.
"Mercier has given us a number of stories. Most we conceive to be fabrications, but there seem to be some elements of truth. Stills, however, has not made a statement of any kind in her defence or in admission of her guilt."
Lizzie listened with rapt attention. It had been the right decision allowing him to remain in the room. His cold logic made everything easier to take in without any added rambling or emotion.
"However, we did discover that there had been two Malivian's present on the planet Trouvadore, apparently sent to collect you. As such it appears that you were singled out for the purpose of being returned to them for their use."
Lizzie remained completely unaware that they had omitted a key piece of information. Focussed on the new information that had so far been hidden from her, she reeled from the realisation that it had been the Malivians who had tried to uproot her from her life again. Her feeling lost and confusion over being taken a second time had been for no reason, this made so much more sense to Lizzie, it didn't make everything okay, but it did stand to reason more than sheer chance.
"Why didn't you tell me this before?"
Kirk answered, "We weren't sure what you knew. It could have put you at risk to share that information. In fact it still could."
For the first time Lizzie felt the lick of anger, "I'm sorry? You withheld the information from me because you wanted to keep me safe? Sharing that information wouldn't have hurt me and you know it. You didn't seem to consider that when I was going practically loopy in sickbay."
Lizzie sat breathing heavily at the revelation and in outrage. How could they hide something this important from her? More importantly she felt almost betrayed by them because she just knew she could have adjusted faster if only she'd known.
You might be kidding yourself, Elizabeth. You weren't much good for anything after that. Hell, Leonard even thought you could be dangerous when you'd gotten back. I don't think you can really reasonably place all of the blame on them.
Lizzie didn't really want to feel reasonable, actually, at that moment she felt she'd quite like to lash out some more. Only the fact that they were her superiors did Lizzie manage to keep a lid on it.
Looking up from her fingers rubbing together, she made eye contact with McCoy. He'd still been watching silently. Her burning irritation softened slightly at his calm gaze. In the lull of the conversation McCoy spoke.
"Let her in."
"What?"
"Let her see Stills."
"Doctor?"
"If she thinks she's ready, then she probably is, and what harm can it do if the woman doesn't say anything anyway?"
If it was possible the Vulcan almost hesitated, "Captain. In this instance, the Doctor's logic is sound."
Kirk ground his teeth, "Bones, are you sure?"
The doctor nodded, and Kirk trusted his judgement. He looked to Lizzie across the table, "Are you sure you want this?"
Lizzie plastered herself together with determination, fixing up the cracks of doubt and pulling everything together.
"Yes."
They stood in the corridor to the brig. Kirk went in, and of course Spock followed. She was left in the corridor with McCoy. The apprehension was palpable. Lizzie had asked for this, but now she was almost doubtful.
What do you even want to say to the woman?
And therein lay the problem. Once again Lizzie wasn't sure what it was she needed to do, she just knew she needed something. She rubbed her fingers together as she leaned against the bulkhead.
McCoy crossed the corridor to stand next to her. Lizzie didn't pull herself from her musings. He reached for her hand, pressing it between his to stop her nervous gesture. His touch caught her attention.
"Do you still want to do this?"
Her body language screamed 'No', Leonard had worked as a doctor long enough to know that much, but there was a certain steel in her features.
Lizzie appreciated the fact he asked her, he didn't tell her she didn't have to do it, or that she wasn't ready, he was giving her an out without making her take it. She thought she might've caved in if he had.
"Yes...I don't know why, I just need too."
He nodded in understanding, possibly more than she had of herself. They stood shoulder to shoulder waiting for Kirk to reappear.
It wasn't long before the door slid open, Lizzie moved away from McCoy a little, readying herself to go in. He clasped her wrist gently, holding her back for a second.
He didn't need to say anything, it was written on his face.
"I'll be fine, they need you more in sickbay." Lizzie said it quietly as she squeezed his hand. She knew it was the confirmation he needed when he squeezed back. She broke the contact, suddenly feeling a little more vulnerable and turned to the doorway where Kirk now stood.
She followed him into the brig. She'd never been in the room before, the lights were uncomfortably bright and the cells were gapingly large and mostly empty. Except for two.
Colin Mercier sat in the nearer cell on a bench. He was smiling with the charm he'd had when Lizzie had first met him in the rec room. And even though in the first instance Lizzie had felt mistrust at his easy smile, it felt all the more dangerous knowing exactly what the man in front of her was capable of. Her hand unconsciously drifted to the right of her chest as her gaze tracked to the next cell.
Lauren Stills sat cross legged on the floor, straight backed and facing the wide white wall at the back of the cell. She didn't move at the incoming footsteps or Kirk's hushed whispers with Spock. Lizzie stared at the mousy brown hair that ran down the woman's back. She couldn't feel anything from Lauren. The woman she'd worked with for months. She'd spent time with, lived with, eaten with. Had everything been faked? Even from the start? Lizzie stared at the figure, the black outline of her clothes highlighting the fall of her hair.
"What are your intentions, Lieutenant?"
Lizzie waited. Yes, what are your intentions, Elizabeth?
"Can I speak to her?"
The officers shared a look, but it was clear they'd anticipated her request.
"Very well. I will activate the comm link to her cell."
It gave a click and Lizzie stepped towards the force field of Stills' cell.
"Lauren?"
The figure almost jerked at the sound of her voice, it was clearly unexpected. Nonetheless the woman refrained from turning and continued facing the wall. Lizzie was disappointed, but she didn't know what she'd been expecting. This Lauren was cold and indifferent, not the bubbly night owl Lizzie had known before.
"It's okay if you don't want to talk. I just wanted to see if you did."
Lizzie hovered in the open space to see if there'd be any reply. There wasn't. She turned back and Spock deactivated the comm.
"I know you said she won't talk, but I'd like to stay a bit longer. If you'll let me."
A silent conversation took place in front of her.
"Lieutenant, is that wise?"
"I know you have to go back to the bridge, so send security back in. I'm not going to interfere."
"Do you not have a shift to get to, O'Neil?"
It was a good tactic on the Captain's part, but, "I'm not on shift, sir."
There was a long wait before Spock spoke again, "Very well, Lieutenant you may stay."
"Thompson will stay here," Kirk gestured and the security officer stepped forward.
They left the deck and Lizzie offered Thompson a greeting, he returned it enthusiastically with a grin.
"It's been a while since we seen you, O'Neil. You was starting to get us worried."
"Me? Never! If it's any consolation, not many people have seen me Thompson."
"Well, least your back now. What you been doing down here anyways?"
"I'm not entirely sure. I just know that my gut's telling me I'm missing something."
"If you trust it then so do I."
Lizzie smiled at him. "Thanks, Thompson."
She sat on the floor watching Lauren's cell, studying her darkened figure for any hidden clue, as if it might suddenly present itself.
Kirk entered the brig light footed, Thompson stood to attention. Lizzie didn't bother, done with formality in this instance.
"Had enough now?"
Kirk had his easy charm back, but Lizzie was immune to it, despite its infectiousness.
She nodded, standing silently. Lauren made no movement, with a last glance Lizzie turned and left the wide room. She didn't look back as she left, but Kirk did one last time to find Lauren staring at them in silence. Her face a warning to Kirk. It spoke volumes.
He turned following Lizzie wordlessly, for all he let on, nothing might've happened. But he could still feel her penetrating glare.
Lizzie remained quiet for a while before stopping in the corridor.
"Captain, I think Lauren should be transferred."
It wasn't emotional on Lizzie's part, she could just feel it. They might've called it women's intuition at one time, or a premonition at another. But Lizzie could feel that keeping her friend on board was dangerous, and something told her she wasn't the only one in danger.
He eyed her skeptically, "And why's that, Lieutenant?"
There was a beat, "Call it what you like, a whim, a notion, a feeling. But something isn't right. I don't think she should be on board, especially not with so many people."
Kirk continued walking. "I don't think she's a concern, O'Neil, she's locked in the brig."
Kirk was clearly humouring her. She didn't press it. She was aware of the little authority she had.
You're a science officer for god's sake, what did you expect?
"I have one more thing, if I may?"
"By all means."
"It's about the Malivians, sir, they clearly need help, they must be desperate to have gone to the trouble they did, there must be something that can be done by the Federation?"
Kirk stiffened, "The Federation can't support a government that instigated the actions they took against you. We can't risk people like you coming to harm. They hid technological advancements from us and used them maliciously, you of all people should be able to see that."
Lizzie couldn't suppress the shudder, or the rising nausea at the reminder of the transporter, her skin beginning to prickle at the shadow memory of ripping pain.
Lizzie dropped her voice an octave, turning it cold, "Yes, I of all people truly understand."
Kirk looked uneasy. Feeling her reaction.
"They need your help."
"Lieutenant. I think you've said enough for today. Thank you for your input, but we'll take it from here."
It was a clear dismissal. They parted ways. If anything Lizzie was more frustrated than when she started.
