DISCLAIMER: I own nothing from the Naruto universe but I do have an imagination of my own. I will take advice and suggestions from my readers' reviews!
Thinking
Biju, etc. speaking
Biju, etc. thinking
Emphasis
Danzo glared back at the Sandaime before his face fell back into a blank mask. It seemed he would have to bring up the demon's attack on the last Uchiha, that insubordinate little shit - so unlike his brother - at another time. Soon, very soon. The Jinchuuriki would be his tool. He would make her into his greatest weapon for now, then dispose of her after she supplied ROOT with enough red-eyed children of Uzumaki descent to house the Kyuubi, one after another if needed until he had what would be his absolute perfect weapon. It was all for the Leaf: he would be their ultimate savior.
Ramen. She needed ramen.
Naruto was no idiot, nor was she naive - well, at least not as much as I was before, she thought as she walked to the stand of the most awe-inspiring gods of deliciousness. This emergency council meeting that Asuma was at? Kakashi must be there, too; that was probably why he took off earlier and she hadn't seen him since. The man was becoming quite "protective" over her: at least that's the term she was using to make herself feel better about his most recent actions. More like possessive and a little… domineering. She groaned out loud. It was nice in a way - but it wasn't something Naruto had ever, EVER expected, or had been on the other side of before. Shikamaru often told her that she had nearly as much a martyr as she did a hero complex in her past life. She had mellowed in the timeline she was in now regarding those things - at least she thought she had…
She'd do anything to protect… everything? Yeah, everything good, anyway. Okay, so maybe she still had a complex of some kind. Shikamaru was no better! How were they supposed to feel and act when they'd been given a second chance to save everything from the absolute hell it was when she had Kurama ripped out of her. She shivered involuntarily. Kami, I can't even imagine what everyone had to go through after Kurama was taken. She remembered trying to hold on to Shika - his chakra had been nearly gone… They had only guessed upon finding one another again in this life that they had died together, each trying to hold onto life and each other's chakra to continue the battle.
She could only imagine what the Ten-Tails was like at full force after Kurama had been taken: the last of the nine being sucked into that fucking statue. She tried to shake off these thoughts, and looked up only to see that battlefield… the wasteland of what had been the edge of… where? She'd been close or in the Land of Fire or River: the broken forests in the background of the now dead and devastated landscape they were desperately fighting in… the only life being the Shodaime's trees that were attacking. Did the reincarnated Shodaime attack? She couldn't remember; it was suddenly very hard to breathe.
"Kit!"
"I - I know; panic attack. Fuck!" Naruto focused on the rough wall of whatever it was she was holding herself up against. Come on idiot! This isn't real! She felt Kurama's warm, calming chakra push through her and slowed her breathing. There was one way she knew of to stop a panic attack. "Do your worst! I dare you to get worse! This isn't real! Fuck you, Panic!" Finally, she could see pavement beneath her feet, rather than the dirt of the battlefield.
"Well look what we have here. The bitch is talking to herself!" Naruto took a deep breath, looking at Kurama in her mindscape. Kami only knew who this woman was, but Naruto knew she was in trouble. Trying to control her shaking - it always followed her panic attacks - she looked up to see a group of women before she was hit in the face with… a purse? "Look at those whiskers: it's the demon herself! You WHORE!"
Naruto saw the disgust on their faces: they were civilians, and obviously hadn't forgotten what she looked like, even now that she was grown. She wasn't sure she'd been called a whore before in either life, except by Sakura that one time... She stood up, then immediately fell to her knees, vomiting - something else that nearly always followed these panic/PTSD events. Inoichi had told her she needed therapy for this shit, and at this moment she was beginning to regret not taking him up on it, even though it had been a long time since her last little breakdown. Of course, he thought these episodes came from one childhood attack or another, not from being freaking killed in the Fourth Shinobi War, so she had refused his offers of counseling. "Go… go away," she told the red-headed leader of the female mob as she tried to stand, only to get attacked by a frenzy of females. "No!" Naruto yelled in her mindscape.
"Don't you tell me no, idiot! I feel what you feel! Those pointy shoes hurt!"
"They're civilians! And we can't let anyone see our combined… Oh damn: that does hurt!" The last thing Naruto saw were shadow spikes coming toward her as something came down on her head, hard.
The Sandaime called for an hour recess after getting his so-called council under control. Everyone was unhappy - even more so than usual for a council meeting, and he wanted to end the thing, but no. The elders - his Genin teammates and rival - insisted on finishing "business" today. Hiruzen had a horrible feeling about what those old coots still planned to do, but couldn't overrule the votes against him. What was sensei thinking when he allowed the ratio of civilians to shinobi to ever possibly come near this? His sensei, the cunning Nidaime, usually had such foresight, especially when it came to entering anything into the village charter - anything at all in writing, actually. Other than some of his experimental jutsus that are locked away, he reminded himself. No one was perfect, no matter how great that person may be.
Kakashi stood between the Hokage and his son. Gods, this is a clusterfuck. And now they're coming for my head. He looked up to the shinobi members of the council who were incredibly emotive now, then looked to Asuma, who had just clapped him soundly on the shoulder - a cigarette already lit in his mouth. He couldn't take the pressure any longer: he pulled his book from its pouch, opened it to a random page, and stuck it in his face. He heard various groans along with a couple of chuckles: those assholes - but at least they weren't all attacking him on his now-revealed young wife's behalf.
Kakashi had allowed Asuma and Shikaku to push him forward, following the Sandaime. He reluctantly shut his book and waited for the inevitable flogging. Asuma was making huffing grunts of laughter intermittently, although it was muffled, and Kakashi really wanted to throttle the stinky man next to him. Naruto had been right: smokestack was a very appropriate nickname for Sarutobi. Some friend you are, enjoying my suffering!
"Put down your smut, brat," Tsume Inuzuka was looking somewhat amused about the whole thing while Asuma chuckled, pulling Kakashi down into the Hokage's office couch beside him.
"Die Old Man!" The ceiling fell open and a small boy fell through, right on top of the Hokage's lap. He was holding a kunai and wearing the dumbest helmet ever made, surely. He was also wearing a long scarf that held him to the Hokage's desk lamp as he struggled to assassinate the village leader.
"Konohamaru-kun," The Sandaime sighed tiredly. A few snickers were heard around the tense room. "This is most definitely NOT the time for your latest assassination attempt. We are very busy." The Hokage disarmed the boy and tapped the retrieved kunai on the boy's helmet gently. "Where… is Ebisu-kun?"
"He's a loser, gramps! I want Nee-chan and Nii-san," Konohamaru demanded with a pout.
"Troublesome," grunted the Jonin Commander. He looked out the open window facing the village. "What the hell?" He was now at full attention as a hidden ANBU called out for a Code 9.
Kakashi and Asuma were on their feet. Asuma must know, too, then. As a former ANBU, Kakashi knew that a "Code 9," the most easily identified name that he could even imagine, was code for the jinchuuriki. Shikaku's bratty son jumped in through the window holding his wife over his shoulder.
"She got jumped by a bunch of broads: must've held back or something," he said lazily, laying her down on the recently vacated couch. He realized Kakashi was on the floor beside him and frowned as the silver-haired man carefully examined her already healing wounds. Shikamaru didn't know whether to hit him or laugh at how tenderly his sister's husband was touching her. Blegh: that makes Kakashi my brother-in-law, he suddenly realized. As if it isn't troublesome enough to think of the also perverted Kankuro and stoic, frightening Kazekage as future brothers-in-law, now I've got this guy… "She'd puked," he added, staring at Kakashi who gave him a strange look in return with that one eye of his.
"My wife! Someone help my wife!" Every shinobi in the room turned to look at the helmeted kid's plea. The kid faltered a bit. "Ano, my future wife," Konohamaru said meekly.
"Looks like you've got a love rival there in my murderous little nephew, Bakahatake," Asuma said with amusement.
That wasn't funny! Especially as his little wife was only now beginning to regain consciousness, and the chibi Sarutobi brat was challenging him to a duel to the death. Not to mention, the last thing he needed in life was another insane rival. Realizing that he was stroking Naruto's whiskered cheek, he pulled back quickly, not fooling anyone.
"Yo!" Naruto said dazedly. Her brother was here, Kakashi was here… Smokestack was here along with Not-dad… Oh, there's JiJi! She could feel the rest more than see them; everything was blurry. She tried to curl into Kakashi, but he moved away. "Bastard," she muttered. She heard chuckles and gave them the finger, only making someone bark out in laughter. Female, but sounds like Kiba. Oh!
"Lord Hokage! I apologize profusely and can assure you that I will not be so negligent in the future with the Honorable Grandson," a Jonin wearing sunglasses dropped to his knees in front of the Sandaime who sighed heavily.
"Ebisu-kun," the Hokage began before being interrupted by his granddaughter's loud voice.
"EBISU?!" The blonde sat up as her hands flew through signs.
"NO NARUTO!" Shikamaru tried to stop her, he really did! Kami knew that he did not want to see which of the supposedly great men around him fell to his sister's perverted jutsu. He heard the poofs and groaned, then scolded his head-injured sister.
"Mmmm, Ebisu-kun," moaned a dozen much-too-naked Narutos.
Ebisu, naturally, fell over with blood gushing from his nose. Shikamaru looked up to see his Uncle Inoichi also gushing blood, but still conscious, thankfully. Chouza was holding in laughter, as his father, Shikaku, was looking away with an expression of pure grief on his face... Hiashi was turned away from the group, holding tightly onto the stoic Shibi's shoulder. The Hokage was wiping blood off his face, too. "Tch!" He then noticed Asuma-sensei holding his hand over his eyes: he apparently knew his sister's horrifying jutsu and how to counter it. The Killing Intent coming from his brother-in-law - blek - finally increased enough to make his sister stop her stupid giggling.
"Mouuuu, Kah-kah-shiiii!" Naruto said in a slow, sad, flirty voice - sounds Shikamaru never wanted to hear again. Her hands started moving through signs again, so Shikamaru jumped on her. The idiot just giggled at him.
"Lose the clouds and I swear I'll shadow strangle you, Namikaz- whatever your long-ass name is now," Shikamaru loudly whispered to her before getting thrown across the room by her jerk husband. Fortunately, it made her release the jutsu. She laid there pouting before rubbing her head and groaning.
"Troublesome." Chouza let out a laugh at his teammate's statement, then kicked his other still-bleeding team member as Inoichi wiped at his nose. Indeed, that was the perfect word for everything that had taken place today.
Tsume Inuzuka walked up to examine the back of Naruto's head - and why did she have a little blood under her nose? "What did you get hit by, kid?"
"Ano… purses and shoes," Naruto pulled back as the Inuzuka matriarch's widened eyes were suddenly in her face. She grasped the side of Kakashi's Jonin pants and held on despite his efforts to escape. "Well… They were civilians! And, and… they got me with something else at the end," she argued quietly.
"Why the hell didn't you fight back?" Tsume asked. Naruto looked up to see the shinobi in the room nodding in agreement as Konohamaru was pushed out the door by ANBU. She noticed the Hokage had just tossed Ebisu's limp body out the window.
"What? But JiJi said never to fight back against civilians," Naruto said, in disbelief of the simple idea of fighting them. Dear gods, if I fought them, I could probably tear every one of them to pieces! She heard Kurama begin purring in her mindscape at the thought and quickly shook her head. If he purred, she might, too, and that would look or sound fucked up!
"Naru-chan, when did I EVER tell you not to fight back?" the Sandaime asked gently.
Naruto sat up and tried to remember. She knew for a FACT that in her past life, JiJi definitely told her not to fight them - right? Gods only knew what she had done to trigger that conversation. Back when she was little in her first lifetime, she had been a little terror, running around the village doing anything and everything to get attention. Had he said the same thing this time? Who knew? That head injury - Oh Kami, I have another one - left her with almost no memories… If I keep letting this happen, I'm going to be dumb as dirt or as empty-headed as Kiba. She jumped at the thought - must be because his mom's in my face. Fortunately, the woman stood up straight again, shaking her head at the blonde. Naruto noticed that Kakashi's fingers were twitching, as his eyes were obviously looking for threats close by.
"Why do you think I had you trained, Naru-chan? Remember?" the Hokage asked.
Naruto really didn't, but Itachi had been her guard during her first life. "My… Uchiha boys?" The words, which suddenly seemed so familiar, rushed out of her mouth in a squeak before she even thought of the consequences. Seeing her JiJi nod his head with such a sad face, tears broke from her eyes. She sucked it up and saw Shikamaru's worried face, but looked away. She could feel Kurama's hesitance - and his concern, too. People were speaking around her but she couldn't concentrate. It's just the knock on my head giving me trouble. She heard a familiar voice and the word "jinchuuriki" and stood immediately, ignoring the nausea and spinning view she was experiencing. "If you're going to refer to me as such, you will refer to me as Jinchuuriki-sama, you fucker!"
Danzo turned and looked at her with that one natural eye of his. She wasn't afraid, oh no. Naruto was beyond pissed at seeing that guy! Knowing that Kurama wouldn't allow her to stay in the asshat-traitor's genjutsu if he dared try it, she was itching for a fight: maybe more than she'd ever felt during this lifetime. Her hands were in fists, and she had to hold back a growling snarl from both herself and Kurama. Kurama's haunches were up in her mindscape and it took every bit of energy she had to fully hold him back - or not rip open the seal right in the middle of everything and everyone. I'm taking that eye: fuck him - fuck this!
She couldn't move, couldn't even speak. Damnit! Why had she allowed his jutsu to advance so much! I'll get you for this Shikamaru Nara! Naruto heard the word "animal" come from that old geezer's mouth, then felt a pinprick in her neck just as she escaped the shadows to attack. Suddenly she was lying in her mindscape. "That… that… Asshole!"
Kurama flopped on the floor, still growling. "I so wanted you to rip the Sharingan out, Naruto." He stretched his back as much as he could in the cage he was suffering in. Naruto reached out to pet his snout and he allowed it. Lying down again, they planned vengeance on both the Warhawk and her deer-herding brother. They were different types of vengeance, of course, but Naruto couldn't wait to inflict her wrath on both of them.
A/N: Please don't be frustrated! I'm already in the middle of the next chapter with the rest of the council meeting.
