Natalie and Adrian walked hand-in-hand down the corridor of the intensive care unit in what unfortunately had become an all too familiar trek. It was now the fifth day since Leland had been shot. Natalie had dutifully called Randy every day for any update on Leland's condition and she had to be the one to see the despondent look in her boyfriend's eyes every time she told him there was no change.

"Stable, but no change," the doctors always said.

She and Adrian had gotten into quite the heated argument the day after Julie was exonerated about the validity of the word stable, and consequently, she and Julie knew well enough to make themselves scarce in the living room as he spent the rest of the day unpacking everything in his kitchen and re-organizing the refrigerator.

She ran her thumb comfortingly against the back of Adrian's hand as they made their way to the same private waiting room they'd all been in the day they'd waited for word on Leland's surgery. Visiting hours weren't for another hour for non-immediate family members but Monk insisted they come. She was surprised, but not shocked, to see Randy and Sharona in the small room as soon as she opened the door.

Randy had been spreading himself incredibly thin the last five days, according to the phone calls Adrian got from Sharona. He spent most of his time at the station doing his best to take care of everything in Leland's absence. On one particular day, he spent the entire day on the phone or in meetings with the mayor and the commissioner, telling them everything that he, the commander, and Monk had discovered about Captain Lewis and Lieutenant Holman. The end result of this was that in large part due to Randy's persistence, Lewis and Holman and District Attorney Drake were all suspended from their positions. The Attorney General of California was personally heading up a full-scale investigation into their underhanded schemes and dirty blackmail and it was doubtful any of them would return to their former jobs.

On other days, Randy was continuing to pull double-duty, working his own captain job and Leland's job as commander.

And, in the midst of all of that, he made time every day, sometimes more than once a day, to come to the hospital to see if there was any word on their friend and his superior officer and mentor, promising he'd stay with Leland in his intensive care room and giving T.K. time to herself for ten minutes, the only break she allowed herself.

Sharona hardly saw Randy but she didn't complain. They were all in limbo and unsure of what to do. They were all grieving for Leland in their own way. This was Randy's way.


"Any news?" Natalie asked quietly. Randy shook his head somberly and Natalie's heart sank even further into her stomach. It had been five full days since the shooting, and each day Leland didn't wake up there was a small voice inside of her head growing louder that wondered if he ever would. She dared not ever say the words out loud so she pushed them down, so far to where she wouldn't have to think about it. "How's T.K. holding up?"

Sharona looked up at Natalie's question. It hadn't escaped her attention that, though Natalie hadn't spoken personally to T.K. in five days or stopped by very often to the hospital, she never failed to ask about her. Maybe there was hope for all of them after all.

Sharona smiled sadly at Natalie. "After you and Adrian took Julie home when Powell got her charges dropped, it took Jared and Max and I a good hour to convince her to go home at least for a little while to get some sleep and eat something that wasn't hospital food. And that was the night that..."

Natalie knew what came next by the way Adrian squeezed her hand. Randy called the morning of the third day to report that Leland had apparently had a hard night - something about his blood pressure bottoming out and it taking the staff a while to stabilize him - and that as soon as T.K. arrived at the hospital she had raised holy hell on the entire staff of the intensive care unit for not being notified of the changes in her husband's condition, and had steadfastly refused to leave his side ever since. She hadn't left the hospital in almost fifty hours and had hardly left his room.

Randy's mouth curved into a slight smile. "And we think the commander is stubborn as hell when he doesn't want to do something. He's got nothing on his wife."

Natalie smiled back, but almost as soon as she smiled, she lowered her eyes in shame. They shouldn't be smiling and laughing about this. "We should have been here. We should all be here more, for T.K.'s sake."


Natalie and Adrian sat in the waiting room with Randy and Sharona for half an hour, the four of them talking quietly and exchanging stories on what had happened outside these hospital walls. The Dishers were happy to hear that so far it had been the best possible outcome as far as Julie adjusting back to her freedom and Randy told Natalie and Adrian as much as he could legally tell them about the ongoing investigation into the Port Patrol officers and the district attorney. He needed to report back to the station that afternoon to get some more work done but the investigation itself was being worked at the highest levels in Sacramento and was being watched carefully by the commissioner. Lewis, Holman and Drake would get theirs, Randy promised. They didn't need to worry about that.


As soon as the clock in the room hit seven, Randy stood up from out of his chair and told the three of them that he was going to check on T.K. and talk to her for a few minutes. Ever since Leland's Wednesday episode, they had been keeping non-family visitors to one at a time, so Sharona simply nodded. "Ask her if there's anything she needs." She said, and he shook his head.

Natalie was there for moral support for Monk, making sure that he wouldn't be left alone as much as for his sake as for those around him. She suffered under no delusion that T.K. would want to see her. In fact, it was becoming increasingly obvious that T.K. more than likely would never want to see her again. Still, she could be there for Monk and she could wait like the rest of them and hope. That's all any of them could do at that time and so that's what she did.


Randy walked down the hall, waited at the set of double-doors at the entrance to the intensive care unit to be buzzed inside, where he was immediately stopped and asked who he was visiting. He knew the reason for this, knew it was simply policy, and even though he was well aware of where Leland's room was due to his visits for the past few days, he listened as she gave him directions and then shot off down the hallway within seconds of her letting him in.

He hesitated briefly then knocked gently on the glass-paned door before entering. He didn't expect a response and didn't take it personally that Leland's wife hardly acknowledged him when he entered the room. Randy called in every favor he could to get the commander a private room during his stay here and he knew now that those had been favors well spent. There was enough space for a second hospital bed to be set up that was supposed to be for T.K., but judging by the sheets, it still hadn't been used. Randy wasn't at all surprised by this fact, given that Sharona had told him that the bed hadn't been used any of the nights T.K. was here and he had never seen so much as a wrinkle in the sheets on the days he was there. Still, he took note just the same.

She was in the same place he'd left her the last time he'd seen her, holding Leland's hand. She sat in one of the hospital chairs which was pulled up as close to his bedside as it could possibly get. A well-worn paperback book was in her lap and after a few seconds of silence he heard her soft voice.

"'First of all," he…that would be Atticus,… he said, "if you can learn a simple trick, Scout, you'll get along a lot better with all kinds of folks.

You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view ... until you climb into his skin and walk around in it..'"

She stopped abruptly, as if she finally saw Randy, and he smiled.

Out of respect, he had remained quiet as she read to her husband, but then, he asked, "To Kill A Mockingbird?"

T.K. nodded. "It's one of my favorites, has been ever since I was a little girl. I figured it had enough law and justice and people trying to do good in it to make Leland happy. I just - I know he's in there still and I know he can hear me, so I thought I'd read to him."

She marked the page with a bookmark and closed the book, wiping her eyes with her hand. She nodded towards the book that was laying on the second hospital bed.

"All Quiet On The Western Front is over there. I know that's one of his favorites. He tried to get me to watch the movie with him once, and I tried so hard to stay awake because I know how much he loves it, but I was asleep within fifteen minutes. He hasn't let me hear the end of it since." She wiped her eyes once more. "I brought the book from his shelf in the living room when the boys and Sharona ganged up on me to get me to go home. I'll start on that once next. But, truthfully, I'm - I'm hoping he'll wake up before that happens."

Randy had to swallow back the lump in his throat that made it hard to talk all of a sudden. "I'm sure he will," he said quietly. "Listen, I'm here now for a few minutes and I'll sit with him, why don't you take a few minutes? Or fifteen or twenty?"

She shook her head. "No, thank you."

"T.K., when is the last time you've…?"

"I ate something from the vending machine a few hours ago and I went to the bathroom forty-five minutes ago. I'm fine. I just want to stay here with him." Her hand clutched at the chain she wore around her neck, the one that now held Leland's wedding ring that the nurse had returned to her before his surgery. "Randy, I'm fine," she repeated, her voice firmer and louder but no more confident to Randy's ears. "Please. I want to be here."

"Then I'll sit here with you," Randy said. He took the chair on the opposite side of Leland's bed. "T.K., uh, look, I know the two of us aren't very close, but I'm just trying to do right by Leland and look after you."

It was quiet for a good while before she responded. "I know," she said quietly. "I know what all of you are doing, and I don't want you to think I don't appreciate it. I just don't want to -"

"You don't want to leave him. We understand," he told her, gently. "But you've been by his side for practically fifty hours straight and he'd be the first one to say that you need a break to take care of yourself. You know he would." He handed her a tissue when her eyes filled with tears like she wanted to cry. "Why don't you go find Jared and Max?"

"Max is at home," T.K. whispered. "He's been refusing to go to school all week and I don't have any energy to argue with him about it and try to make him go, so he's at home." She stroked the inside of Leland's palm with her thumb. "I'm sorry, Leland."

Randy pretended not to hear her as her voice got softer and she talked quietly to her husband. "I'm the only one to take care of him and your son hasn't gone to school for almost a week. I'm so sorry."

Randy handed her another tissue. "I'm pretty sure he'll forgive you," he said, in the same quiet voice as her.

T.K. looked up at Randy and motioned for him to hand over her phone. She scrolled through her recent texts and found a picture and handed the phone back to Randy. "Max texted me this yesterday," she said.

Her eyes shined with unshed tears, but no longer was she crying. "Seems Monk was in our house and now our refrigerator is categorized by color, shape, and food group. I told him not to even think about touching any of it. I want it to be left exactly how it is so Leland can see it."

Randy looked uncomfortable. "Uh…well, that's just Monk. I can go talk to him about it if you…"

"No, no, no!" T.K. said, waving him off. "Adrian was just trying to help. I know that. I want to leave it that way if for no other reason, Leland will get a kick out of it when he sees the pictures."

Randy nodded, understandingly.

They talked for a few moments more and through some more gentle persuasion, Randy was finally successful in getting T.K. to agree to take a break. She argued him down from twenty minutes to fifteen to ten, though he would take anything at this point, and he made a point of averting his eyes as T.K. slowly stood, bringing Leland's hand to her mouth and kissing it. She leaned forward and brushed her lips against his forehead.

"Randy's here," she whispered, tenderly. "I'll be back in ten minutes, I promise. Don't worry, sweetheart. I'm not going far." T.K. quickly brought her fingers to her mouth and kissed them, before pressing her fingers to her husband's cheek. "Please wake up soon," she whispered. "I miss you."

Randy walked with T.K. to the door, promising for the fifth time in as many minutes that he would come find her or get word to her if anything changed with Leland in the twenty minutes she was gone.

"Ten." T.K. corrected.

"Ten." He replied.


As soon as she was gone, he closed the door to the commander's room and stood at the foot of his bed.

"Hey, commander,"

Randy shook his head and cleared his throat. If Sharona and the doctors were right and the commander could hear them from wherever he was right now, he needed to hear Randy sounding confident and solid and secure - everything that Randy didn't feel about himself.

"It's me, Randy Disher, your protege. But you probably already knew that. We've all been here the last couple of days and we've even been sitting in here with you when T.K. lets us. But I bet you knew that too… You know everything I do, especially the dumb stuff... Which means you basically know everything I do, before I do it."

He swallowed back the lump in his throat. The commander was always doing something, always working. It was unnerving and threw everything out of whack to see him here in the hospital so still and un-moving.

"Sharona's been here a lot to support T.K. She's always around to explain the medical stuff to T.K. in a way she can understand it." Randy glanced up. "Not that I'm saying your wife is stupid, I'm not saying that at all.

I can't understand half of the medical words they say around here and I'm married to a nurse. So, I'm just letting you know that she's being taken care of. Jared and even Max are looking out for her, too. You'd be proud of them."

Randy's sneakers shuffled and squeaked against the floor, and even he winced at the noise it made. How he wished the commander would wake up right about now to yell at him to "be quiet Randy!" After all, it was a hospital.

Swallowing, he continued. "T.K.'s strong, you don't have to worry about her, but Monk, man, he's not doing so well without you. He almost got himself and Natalie kicked out of the hospital because he kept touching and organizing things, and Natalie and Julie said he spent an entire day re-organizing his refrigerator and his pantry at home.

Your wife showed me a picture on her phone - Monk showed up at your house and all of your food is color-coded now. She wants you to see the pictures before she touches any of it."

Randy sniffed, then cleared his throat. "I'm trying, commander, I'm really, really trying. I'm trying to do your job and mine and make you proud of me, and I'm trying to take care of your wife, and Monk, and everything, but it's hard, man. It's so hard to do this without you."

The commander didn't move or show any signs of life.

"I got Natalie and Monk in touch with Harrison Powell the night you were shot, and the next day they were in court with the judge. Melody's in jail and Julie's free. All the charges against her were dropped and her record is clean. Monk and I will tell you all about it when you..." Randy refused to finish the sentence, or more accurately he couldn't finish the sentence for the lump in his throat that threatened to overwhelm him and the tears that flooded his eyes. "I know you're the commander. You're the superior officer and that is how it should be, but I'm going to give you an order anyway. Commander Stottlemeyer, I am ordering you to wake up."

His vitals remained steady and stable. There was no sign that Leland had heard anything or was going to wake up anytime soon. Randy was beginning to understand now why the commander's wife said she hated the word stable.

"Please, commander," Randy whispered. "For your wife and your boys. For Monk. For all of us. We need you, man. This - this team doesn't work without you."