Notes:
"Memory can make a thing seem to have been much more than it was." – Marilynne Robinson, Gilead
It's a long walk from the warehouses to the Lucky Cat Cafe. Also, no Aunt Cass this chapter. We have to address the boys first!
"Hey." What else was Tadashi supposed to say? The remorse was unbearable. He rubbed the back of his neck, the hoodie still half propped up.
"Tadashi?" The crack in Hiro's voice broke his heart. The teenage version of his baby brother stood frozen, eyes wide and full of shock.
"Yeah," Tadashi said. "I… uh, may have been a little late to dinner."
The air was sucked out of Hiro's lungs. The person he was chasing was… no. It couldn't be. It was a distraction, a trick. Tadashi was supposed to be dead. Still, Hiro inched his way closer.
The disheveled hair and warehouse grime didn't shield Tadashi from the scrutiny. Eye bags that never used to be there hung heavily on his face. Faded scars, bruises, and scratches littered his arms. Every injury could have gone unnoticed if not for the industrial lights.
It was still him. Somehow, it really was Tadashi.
"How?" Hiro asked. Every step he took forward, his older brother took several steps back.
Okay, not a good sign, Hiro thought. Plus, Tadashi's attempt to escape was somewhat suspicious. He could be different. He could be hurt. He could be a million things.
There wasn't any room to run through the possibilities. Tears welled despite Hiro's efforts to keep his cool.
Tadashi didn't know what to do. He was panicking. He saw the millions of questions running through Hiro's head. Tadashi wanted to escape but his brother grounded him to the spot.
He moved in to give Hiro a very awkward and reassuring shoulder pat, only for him to crash into Tadashi's side full of sobs, snot, and all. He stood there, slack-jawed, as his little brother embraced him without a second thought. Rejection, anger, and hatred were all on the list of reactions he was expecting. Several seconds of disbelief passed before Tadashi wrapped his arms around him and squeezed.
"It's a long story."
Hiro backed up from the hug angrily, "But why?" he half-yelled. "Huh? Why did you wait? Why didn't you just come home?" Tadashi tried to grab him by the shoulders. Hiro pushed himself further away, "This… this isn't real. You're not… you can't!"
Honestly, this was not how Tadashi imagined meeting his family if he ever planned on it. Not that he didn't want to.
He was still scolding himself for the lackluster comment. 'Hey.' What kind of response was that? There had to be a better approach.
Run. Speak. Do something. All Tadashi could do was attempt to respond.
"Why?" Hiro asked again.
Pyrokinesis, Tadashi thought. He never came home because of pyrokinesis. And well, his lack of better judgment after the trauma of waking up in a completely different reality.
He was dreading the existential crisis that would hit everyone who dared to enter the Lucky Cat Café.
And, of course, the threat of bursting into flames.
Now, Hiro was going to have to relive his nightmare a couple of years after everyone else moved on. Well after Tadashi accepted his circumstances. Coming home was a milestone that was going to hurt.
"I was afraid," Tadashi replied. "And, I made some bad choices."
Hiro punched his shoulder.
"Yeah, no kidding, knucklehead! What were you thinking?" Hiro launched back into the hug. A million questions flooded his head at once.
Why are you here?
Is it really you?
What kind of messed up game is this?
Why?
Just why?
But all he could do was hold onto his brother as if letting him go meant he would disappear again.
Baymax beeped in the background, his visor flipping upwards. Hiro turned towards him.
"Is that... who I think it is?" Tadashi asked. Hiro tensed up and wiped his face clean.
"Long story?" He wriggled out of the hug once more. "And what about you?" Hiro said. "How-? Why, why are you here? Are you in trouble? Were you running from someone?"
Tadashi didn't know how to answer. The armor caught his attention. Hiro stood taller than his 14-year-old self. He asked questions with more authority. Yet the kid in front of him was his baby brother, not some superhero keeping strangers in check.
He raised his eyebrows, "Wait a minute, what are you doing out this late? You're playing vigilante? What are you thinking?"
Oh, those were fighting words.
"Tadashi," Hiro argued, "You're not supposed to be here. You're not supposed to be alive. What's going on? You're… you're-" He couldn't ask everything at once. Hiro was overwhelmed.
"You're right," Tadashi said. He needed to cut off his brother's train of thought before his brain decided to wreck itself. "Look, I know you're going through a lot. This is a lot. But, the best thing we can do is stay calm. I promise I'll explain everything. Okay?"
Hiro frowned. He tried to run his hand through his hair, only for his hand to smack against his helmet.
"Unbelievable," Hiro said. Baymax beeped again.
"Hiro, my neurotransmitters are detecting rising-"
"Not now, Baymax!" He was hyperventilating. What were the chances that this was another ploy? It was Tadashi. It had to be. All of Hiro's trust, hope, and visions of the future were radically transforming in a matter of seconds. "I can't. I don't, I don't understand it! You're-"
"I said I would tell you," Tadashi said. "Just, let me explain?" The tiredness in his face became more apparent. Hiro shut his mouth. He was exhausted too.
Hiro wiped more of his tears away, "Just come home this time."
Tadashi froze. Hiro wasn't grounding him anymore. Instead, it felt like his shoes glued to the cement.
"Home?" he asked. Mental images of being surrounded by flames flashed in Tadashi's mind. Two years of suffering only to end up in the one place he was trying to avoid. His rules, his pledge, and his fears obliterated any hope for normalcy. "Uh, um…" Hiro pulled Tadashi by the arms as Baymax gently pushed him forward. "I can't."
Hiro turned sharply on his heel, still drenched in tear stains, "What do you mean 'you can't?'"
That familiar pain in Tadashi's side gave a warning of his lack of control. He could tell Hiro now? That might be too much.
"I…"
Another crash from the warehouse entry sounded off. A security team, a real security team, slammed open the metal slide door. "Hey! You! Stop!"
Hiro snagged his brother's arm with a metal grip.
"Aw, Krei's gonna kill me if he finds out I'm here! Come on!"
The guards bolted towards Baymax. Tadashi was still trying to piece together what little information he had. He was caught between running from the guards, running from his brother, and heading somewhere towards an exit.
Tadashi broke free from the grasp.
Hiro swirled back around, locking eyes with him. Don't do it. Anything but that. Don't disappear again.
Tadashi started to sprint in the opposite direction. A hollow feeling filled Hiro's chest. Tadashi trailed backwards, towards an exit before being scooped up by his former SFIT project from behind. So much for making decisions on his own.
Baymax flicked out a pair of wings before launching into the air. The edges of the red suit slammed into the side of the equipment as Tadashi's side seared with heat with each bump.
Not now. Please, not now.
Hiro mounted onto Baymax's magnetic holds, shoes automatically strapping in as he shoved the devastation down. He was bringing his brother home regardless.
"Let's go!" Hiro shouted. Rocket boosters built into the armor whirred. And soon, Tadashi's line of sight was blocked by a hunk of 3D-printed armor. Baymax shielded him as he made a sharp angle for the ceiling.
The rooftop splintered into pieces.
Tadashi felt all of it, unable to assist. The sheer force of the rockets gave both boys whiplash.
The security guards shrank in the distance as Tadashi opened his eyes to the night sky.
He shouldn't have run. He was going home whether he wanted to or not. The lack of a response from Hiro made things worse.
He let all tension go as he leaned against Baymax's armor. Silence now filled the space between him and his brother.
Question after question filled Hiro's head. He needed to start the conversation. He was upset. No, furious. Well no, confused. Hiro just wasn't ready to handle the onslaught of issues about to hit him. The somber tone wasn't helping either.
"So," Tadashi finally asked, "this is what you've been doing?"
Hiro grimaced. They were flying home via Baymax. He never really considered Tadashi's thoughts on hero work or using his SFIT project for that matter. Maybe he would be mad or overly-concerned... in a good, I'm-still-the-responsible-sibling kind of way.
Yet Tadashi's words were too hushed. He was upset, sure. Hiro couldn't read his other emotions.
"It was my way of doing something good," Hiro said. "Baymax is still the same, though."
The faint sound of robotic batteries dying changed the atmosphere drastically.
"Uh-oh," Baymax said. The rocket boosters puffed out the last of exhaust before dropping several feet.
Hiro screamed as Tadashi closed his eyes and braced for impact. Upset wasn't the word. Terrified certainly was. For now, he just wanted to avoid incoming injuries.
The giant robot slammed and skidded across an open field. Dirt flooded over both boys as they struggled to hang on. Baymax slowed to a halt, half-buried, as Hiro frantically tried to claw his way out from underneath the armor.
"Tadashi!" he yelled. He just found him. It was too early to lose him to another accident. A muffled laugh came from underneath the mound of a useless robot. Hiro shoved Baymax's arm away.
"I'm okay!" Tadashi said. A huge grin was plastered onto his face. "I'm okay. It's still in his programming to avoid injury!"
"Oh my God," Hiro said, "We just fell from the sky, and you're happy about his programming? Are you insane?" Tadashi may not have remembered everything before the accident, but he knew enough.
"A year and a half of programming will do that to you." Tadashi pried himself free, the aches coming back in bits and pieces. Hiro moved to pull him by the arms, only for Tadashi to jerk away in pain with a yelp.
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Hiro said, hands raised in the air.
"Don't… don't be stupid. I'm alright." Hiro nodded his head nervously as he looked back at the hunk of 3D-printed armor partially buried in the ground.
Baymax couldn't walk home.
Great. Just great, Hiro thought. Tadashi was hurt yet somehow alive, and Baymax was dead weight. And he didn't even get a chance to check Krei's inventory. Silent Sparrow would have to be shelved. Hiro was forced to drag everyone home and it was going to be grueling.
"Where… where are we, anyway?" Tadashi asked. The image of Tadashi backing away was ingrained in his mind. An unsettling feeling was rooted in Hiro's chest. If his brother really wanted to stay hidden, now was his chance.
"San Fransokyo. Not even near the university." Hiro helped his brother stand on his feet, "We're nowhere close to home, that's for sure."
Tadashi was out of energy for the night. No, make that a month. Two months, maybe. Rules or no rules, Tadashi needed to rest. He could contain his powers for a night.
The screaming and the breakdowns were worth it. Just no more running; no more not-knowing. His eyes were starting to close without permission. "How long until we get there?"
They walked in the dark for 40 minutes. The awkward silence came back in full.
Hiro dragged Baymax's deflated body across the pavement while he gripped onto Tadashi's arm. The red, 3D armor was either abandoned at the crash site or still hanging onto the vinyl by sheer luck.
Step by step, the house drew closer.
Tadashi was slower than he remembered, but who was checking? He looked down at Hiro, who was stricken with shock. Right, he was checking.
His legs were getting heavy, his sleep schedule was catching up, and the never-ending aches nearly convinced him it was alright to call it quits. Hiro pushed him forward anyway.
Yet, Tadashi could still escape. He could run.
Just don't do this, he thought. Anything but walk back home. Out of all the terrible ideas to follow through with, this one? Still, his eyelids were practically shutting on their own. Two years of dodging his old life managed to total into a chaotic swirl of what-ifs.
Maybe Hiro finding him was a good thing.
No more unidentified hospital visits. No more moving from motel to motel, only to wander back towards the warehouses. No more being on his own.
There was absolutely no controlling his fiery outbursts; Tadashi knew that. At least, not anytime soon. But he had a support group, right? Once they were past the introductions and the anger, they would make it to the other side unscathed. He was hoping for it.
There was no justification for staying away from home anymore. Tadashi had enough.
The Lucky Cat Cafe came into view after an eternity of walking. They trudged together as Hiro pulled him along.
The dim lights stemming from behind the glass brought a bizarre mixture of fear and happiness. And for a second, Tadashi smiled.
A cramp sent him toward the ground. He gritted his teeth and groaned. Hiro watched in horror from behind Baymax's shapeless vinyl as his brother clutched his side.
"What's wrong?" Hiro asked anxiously. No reply. The pain was overbearing. Hiro took off his helmet, "Okay! Just… um. You can camp out in the garage, and I'll go call Aunt Cass!" Tadashi glared up at him. "No, no, you're right. That's a terrible idea. Maybe we should call an ambulance? How am I going to explain that?"
Tadashi stopped him mid-rant, shaking his head violently. His hand shot up to cover Hiro's mouth as he fell back onto the sidewalk. The cramp in his side locked him in place.
Hiro eyed him up and down, worry written all over his face. Tadashi looked like he was seconds away from collapsing completely.
"You… you don't want an ambulance? Are you sure about that?" Hiro didn't realize that going home was the furthest thing from his brother's plans; nevermind a hospital. Tadashi was tired. The warm bed his brother denied that night was now a 99% possibility. Nothing would bring him more joy.
Still, they needed to trek from the alleyway to the garage and then upstairs. Getting Tadashi out of the warehouse was one thing. Flying was another shock that added to the situation. Now they had to cross the ultimate barrier: Aunt Cass.
Hiro was too young to handle the gravity of the situation. He was about to bring his dead brother back to life. There was no time to plan or elaborate on an explanation that made sense.
He was confused and almost sick. Would Tadashi even say anything once he was well? What made him stay away? It wasn't like he didn't love his family, right? Right?
"Oh my God," Hiro repeated, running his hands through his hair, "How am I supposed to explain this? What were you doing out in a warehouse? How are you even alive?"
Hiro was flipping between watching his brother try to walk back home and say, 'um,' more times than he liked.
How would Cass react? Sure, Hiro could say he just found him in an abandoned warehouse. But then she would ask questions. Big Hero 6 was still a secret.
Question after question fell out of Hiro's mouth subconsciously. What w-
"Can you please stop worrying?" Tadashi finally managed to spit out. He straightened up, pushed the pain away, and held Hiro's shoulders down.
"I- I'm sorry," Hiro whispered.
"Don't be. I'm the one who should be sorry. But right now, let's just focus on getting somewhere safe." He stood up slowly and followed Hiro towards the cafe.
Tadashi was dreading the introductions too.
What on earth was he gonna say to his aunt? 'Hey there, Cass! Sorry I ducked out of two years of both of your lives. I was scared I'd frighten you guys into the next millennium.'
Tadashi stopped walking. Regret began to replace every bone in his body.
Hiro turned back, "What is it?" Tadashi didn't answer. He was lost in thought and didn't hear a word. "Tadashi," he pleaded, "Please, say something."
Hiro watched the gears begin to turn in his brother's head.
Truth be told, Tadashi didn't know what to do either. He wanted to be the know-it-all but, right now, he was drained. The front door of the cafe felt like it had magically appeared after miles of empty streets.
He put his head in his hands, "Ugh, I just," Tadashi sighed, "I should have just come home." Hiro was attempting to take it all in.
"Okay. Well, um, we can take this slow. But right now, I can't even hear myself think and you look like you're falling apart."
Hiro leaned down to meet his eyes.
"What are we supposed to do, genius? You still have anything in that big brain of yours?" he asked. Tadashi took a second to come up with a reply. He stuck his hand out and pointed at the café.
"How about we just go through the front door?"
Notes:
Y'all. I love unceremonious 'welcome back' parties. The chaos, the ruin - absolute perfection.
I'm super excited to see Cass finally have her moment in the next update. She's under-appreciated and deserves more love.
I've reread this story so many times, the shock value is gone. Bruh, give me that good critique so I can improve and stuff! See you guys Feb. 21!
