Click Your Heels Three Times

The first thing Aisling was aware of was that she was lying on something soft. A bed. And there was something up her nose. She didn't open her eyes, feeling a bit disoriented. But there was something heavy leaning against her leg.

She then heard the soft murmur of voices in the background. But they weren't voices she recognized. Something about storm damage. Taking a deep breath, she tried to move her hand, finding that she could wiggle her fingers.

It was then that she finally opened her eyes, looking around and finding that she was in a hospital room.

It had worked.

Gingerly, she sat up and looked over, seeing Liam passed out in a chair, curled up in a way that couldn't be comfortable, a blanket on top of him. She then looked over, finding Tiernan leaned over on the bed, his head next to her leg and his eyes closed.

Aisling took a deep breath, tears already springing into her eyes. She was part relieved, but part in agony. Because even though it worked, she was still separated from Haldir. She brought her hand up to wipe away her tears and then looked down at Tiernan. Serious, brave Tiernan. His hair mussed up as though he had spent the last few days running his fingers through it constantly.

Or how long had it been?

She studied him closely and then looked over at Liam. They both looked the same, though they could both use a shave.

There was a sudden crash and Aisling looked over, seeing a nurse standing in the doorway to her room, her eyes wide as a tray of food was now splattered across the floor. The sound immediately had both her cousins stirring. She looked down as Tieran blinked his eyes open, looking up at her. He then shot up out of his chair, his mouth falling open.

"Oh my god," he breathed before he reached out and pulled her into a crushing hug. "Oh my god."

Aisling was vaguely aware of the nurse calling for a doctor as Liam jumped out of his chair and to her side, also wrapping his arms around her. Tears began pouring down her cheeks as she held onto her cousins.

But while she was happy to see them, she felt pain unlike anything she had ever experienced in her heart.

"Hal…" she thought, wishing there was some way to let him know that it worked. That she was back. And she was okay.

"Holy fuck, you're awake," Liam said, the first to let her go as he stared at her in awe. Aisling couldn't speak, only nodded. She then looked at Tiernan as he let her go.

Upon closer examination, she could see the dark circles under his eyes. And she had never seen him look so worn out.

"I'm okay," she finally said, watching as tears filled Tiernan's eyes. He reached out, touching her face as though he couldn't believe she was actually speaking to him. She swallowed and looked back and forth between them. "What… what happened?"

"The wind knocked loose a board in the shed. It hit you in the head," Liam said. Aisling focused her eyes on him. "We managed to get the door open to the shelter and pull you in, but… you wouldn't wake up."

"The doctors… they couldn't figure out what it was," Tiernan added. Aisling looked over at him. "Your injuries weren't that bad… and there was no brain damage as far as they could tell… but… you wouldn't wake up…"

Aisling took a deep breath and then reached out, taking each of her cousins' hands as she closed her eyes, not wanting to ask the next question, but knowing she needed to. Her mind was a swirling mess at the moment, but she needed to find something to focus on. She was already feeling dizzy.

"The house?" she whispered.

"It's fine," Liam said. Aisling's eyes shot open as she looked at him. "Before the tornado got close it just… dissipated. There's no damage at all. And the horses are fine. Toto too."

Aisling breathed a sigh of relief, happy that her family home was still standing and Sunfire, the other horses and Toto were safe. But just as the relief settled in, she felt the pain start up again as she thought about Haldir. Tears welled up as she tried to take a deep breath but ended up sputtering a bit. She was back and she wanted to see her cousins and know they were okay, but the pain was much harder than she expected.

"Ash, it's okay. You're awake," Liam said, squeezing her hand. "Everything is going to be okay now."

She looked over at him. She wanted to say that nothing was okay and that her heart was literally breaking in front of them, but that seemed like a good way to get her locked up in the psych ward, so she kept her lips shut. Hell, how did she even begin explaining what happened to her? Just moments ago, she was in Lorien, drinking poison and dying in the arms of a man she loved with her entire soul and being.

And now she was sitting in a hospital bed. Seemingly fine. Yea, there was no good way to explain that. So instead, she asked the only other question that entered her mind.

"How… how long have I been out?" she asked softly.

"Twelve days," Tiernan said. She looked over at him. "You were in a coma for 12 days…"

She could see the agony in his eyes and remembered what she had heard before.

"It wasn't your fault," she said. "You know that, right? I ran after Toto." Tiernan swallowed and looked away, running his fingers through his hair. "Seriously, Tier. Don't blame yourself."

"Kind of hard not to," he admitted, looking back at her.

"But I'm okay now," she said, suddenly feeling guilty.

She had chosen to give up this life. To leave her cousins behind. What would have happened if she never came back? Or well, she would have died eventually. They would have waited for her to wake up, however long that took. But at the same time, she knew if given the choice again, she wouldn't change anything.

And she couldn't tell them about it.

Before anyone could say anything else, a doctor and two nurses rushed into the room, asking for Liam and Tiernan to leave or at least step aside as they looked her over. Aisling was certain she was about to be put through a battery of tests. And that her cousins were not about to go willingly. But somehow, the doctor got them to leave.

As they ran through a few things and then started to wheel her out for a head scan, Aisling wrung her hands together and then stopped, looking down at her hands. Her heart nearly stopped as she realized the gold ring she wore on her index finger - the one Haldir gave her on their wedding day - was gone.

She looked up, her eyes widening slightly. She had been in a coma for 12 days. She had been in Middle Earth for a year. As she looked down to her hand again, she began to wonder - had it all really been a dream?

OOOO

A week later, Aisling was sitting on her bed in the townhouse, Toto lying peacefully in her dog bed in the corner, finally happy to have some peace and quiet. Even though everything had checked out okay, the doctors still wanted her to stay a few more days, still unsure of just why she had been in a coma to begin with. And she was pretty sure if she told them it was because her consciousness had been somehow transported to another world, they would have made her stay even longer.

But during the days she had been stuck there, Liam and Tiernan barely left her side. And then there were the visitors. The Wrights had come by with the twins making off-colored jokes that had their father smacking them in the back of the head. Amanda had brought cookies that she made. Avery even came by, dropping off flowers to add to the already stunning array that had come in while she was asleep. Or in a coma, rather.

And with each person, Aisling found herself even more overwhelmed, discovering it was difficult to separate her time in Middle Earth from her current reality. She had made a joke with the twins about dancing, forgetting for a moment it was something that happened in Imladris which had garnered a few strange looks. Thankfully, she played it off as a coma thing.

She had then almost called Avery Aragorn, but managed to catch herself, though she saw Liam and Tiernan sharing a worried look. And every time she heard footsteps coming down the hall towards her door, she couldn't help but sit up, waiting for Haldir to walk in. But he never did.

And the longer she was awake, the more she began to wonder. Had it all really been some sort of elaborate coma dream? Had she been right in her original assessment all along?

But it had felt so real. And the pain she now felt at being separated. That was real. It had to be. Something she made up in her head wouldn't hurt this much, would it?

"How you doing, kid?"

Aisling looked over at Liam, who was leaning against the frame of her door. She offered him a weak smile.

"Good to be home," she said. He smiled in return, but it was clear in the look he was giving her that he didn't fully believe her.

She supposed the fact that she had woken him and Tiernan up in the hospital shouting in her sleep was probably going to have him keeping a close eye on her and worried for a bit longer.

"What do you want to eat?" he asked. "We could order something or I could make my famous pasta?"

Aisling chuckled, knowing his famous pasta was just sauce and spaghetti noodles that he often didn't let cook long enough. She pushed up from the bed.

"Think you better let me help with your 'famous pasta'," she said, feeling a bit more like herself.

"I can do it myself," Liam said, frowning playfully.

"Right," Aisling said, rolling her eyes and already walking past him out of her room, Toto on her heels.

After sometime, they were both in the large kitchen, Aisling chopping up onions while Liam defrosted the meat. Toto was sitting at her side, patiently waiting for scraps. Aisling was surprised that Tiernan wasn't there, but remembered he had run off to some meeting about the gala and potential merger, saying he would stop by afterwards to fill them in.

Right. The merger. It suddenly didn't seem as important.

"So… how much stuff have I missed at work?" she asked, glancing at him.

"You seriously want to talk about that?" Liam asked with a chuckle. Aisling shrugged.

"I'm already behind. Figured it was best to jump back in," she said.

"Well, Tier is still dead set on the merger," Liam said with a sigh.

"Right… suppose it's not a bad idea," Aisling said lightly.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" Liam asked. Aisling stopped chopping and looked over at him, seeing the shock clear on his face. "I thought you hated the idea of the merger."

Aisling turned back to chopping, her eyes locked on the knife as it slid through the onion. She had been against it, but now… Her mind was too focused on other things. Though it had only been a bit over a week since she had been back, it felt like years. And everytime she closed her eyes, she saw Haldir's face. Heard him say her name in her sleep. He was gone, so what did it matter if they merged with the European chain?

"Guess I changed my mind," she said.

She heard Liam walk over and lean against the island next to her.

"I'm fine," Aisling said automatically, not meeting his eyes.

"I call bullshit," Liam stated. She looked over at him, pausing in her work. "You tossed and turned most nights in the hospital. At least the nights they didn't give you something to knock you out."

"Really, it's okay," she said.

"You're hiding something. And you never do that," Liam said. "You know you can tell me."

"I guess… I'm still just a bit… overwhelmed, you know? I was in a coma for 12 days and the doctors still don't know why. Tiernan's got me going to some hotshot neurologist. Maybe he'll have something," she said, keeping her voice light.

"Maybe you should see a therapist. I know a good one," Liam suggested. Aisling turned and glared at him.

"I don't need a therapist. I'm fine," she stated. Liam backed up from her, his hands up.

"Wasn't saying that, Ash. You know I'm only trying to help," he replied. "But we are worried about you. I just want to help."

Aisling stared at him a moment and then sighed, running her fingers through her hair. She knew he was telling the truth and it wasn't fair to snap at him. And really, she had missed him while she was gone. It was only 12 days to Tiernan and Liam, but it was a year to her. She finally smiled softly and stepped over, wrapping her arms around him. Liam immediately returned the embrace.

"I'm sorry. You're right. I'll… I'll think about it," she said.

"Okay. Just know we both have your back, kid," Liam said, rubbing her back. Aisling felt tears spring up again.

God, she was tired of crying.

"Thanks."

OOOO

For a moment, Aisling thought she had gone back.

She stood in the home she had shared with Haldir. Closing her eyes, she put her head back and breathed deeply, allowing the calm to fill her.

"Aisling."

She spun around, her eyes widening before she started grinning and ran over to him, throwing her arms around him.

"Oh god, I miss you," she breathed, already feeling the tears prick her eyes. She then stepped back and looked up into his eyes. He smiled softly at her. "I hate being away… I wish we had more time…"

"We will find each other again," he said before kissing her. Aisling slid her eyes closed, relishing in the kiss. Even if it was only in her dreams.

But when she opened her eyes, she was no longer in the forest, but now stood on a castle wall, watching as chaos reigned around her.

"Oh my god."

The large creatures - orcs - were laying siege to the castle and from her untrained eyes, there was no way they would lose. All around her men and elves were dying in mass. Even though she wanted to look away, she couldn't, her eyes searching for him.

And then she found him on the wall. Aisling tried to yell out to him, but couldn't. Haldir had turned and shouted something to his men then turned to run. They were retreating. Aisling took a step forward, even though there was no way she could get to him. This was just a dream, after all.

Well, more like a nightmare. But even though she knew that he was going to die and had imagined it, it was never this real. This intense.

And she was stuck watching, unable to do anything. Tears poured down her cheeks as she watched him fight his way down the wall and then turn, not seeing the orc come up on his side. Aisling jumped, her hands flying to her month as the crude sword sank into his side and then another attacked from behind.

Orophin ran up and fought them off, but Aisling knew it was too late. Haldir was dying and she was stuck on this wall, unable to get to him.

"HALDIR!" she finally somehow managed to shout, agony filling her.

She squeezed her eyes shut and when she opened them, she was now standing over him. She jumped and looked around, but no one saw her. Noticed her. She was still in the dream.

She then looked down at him, seeing him struggle to breath as Orophon and Aragorn held him. They then locked eyes and Aisling swore he could see her.

"I'm here!" she cried out.

He lifted his hand towards her.

"I'm… coming... Aisling…"

He then leaned back and his last breath left his body. Aisling stared as Orophin shook him and then Aragorn jumped up and ran off, his sword up and shout on his lips. Rumil ran up and tried to drag his brother away, both of them inconsolable. All Aisling could do was stare down at Haldir's dead body, struggling to breathe.

"Hal… no… HALDIR!"

"Christ, wake up!"

Aisling's eyes opened and for a moment, she wasn't sure where she was, struggling against strong arms trying to hold her down. She then stopped, realizing she was in her bed in the townhouse, her sheets tangled up around her legs and Liam attempting to stop her from thrashing around.

She looked up at him, knowing her cheeks were coated in tears and she probably looked wild.

"Calm down, it's okay," Liam asked, his hair going everywhere as concern filled his eyes and he backed away. "It's okay, Ash. It was just a dream."

She stared at him a few moments, trying to breathe, but then sat up and wiped her cheeks.

"But… it wasn't," she murmured. She glanced over at Liam and then back down at her hands.

"There's something you're not telling me, Ash. What is it?" he asked. Aisling sniffled, feeling as though she was going to start crying again.

But at the same time, she was tired of trying to keep it all inside. Maybe Liam would understand.

"When I was in a coma… something strange happened…"

Liam sat silently, allowing Aisling to speak at her own pace, not showing any sort of expression. She continued staring down at her hands, her eyes latched onto her bare finger.

When she finally finished, Aisling closed her eyes a moment and then chanced a look at Liam. He was looking away, his brow furrowed. He then looked back at her and sighed, shaking his head.

"Ash… you didn't go anywhere. You were in a hospital bed the entire time," he finally said.

"I'm not… that's not what I meant. My… mind. It went somewhere else," she said vehemently. Liam stared at her and then reached out, taking her hands.

"It was just a dream," he said gently.

"It wasn't! It was real!" Aisling shouted, pulling her hands from his. Liam grimaced. "It, it has to be!"

"Ash… I really think you should see the therapist," he said. Aisling stared at him, her mouth dropping open.

"I'm not crazy," she stated.

"And I'm not saying you are, just… you were in a coma for 12 days. I think… it could help you deal with this," he said. Aisling only stared at him. "Seriously. You're worrying both of us. You toss and turn every night. And you keep saying his name… in your sleep. You haven't been the same since you woke up."

"I told you," she retorted. "We were married-"

"Enough, Aisling," Liam said sternly, causing her to jump slightly in surprise. "Look, you're really scaring me, kid. Please, just… go to the therapist. Talk to her. You're never going to get better if you don't try."

Aisling swallowed and was silent a few moments before nodding. She should have known that he wouldn't believe her. He thought she was losing her mind. Maybe she was.

Liam leaned over and kissed her forehead.

"It's going to be okay," he said, smiling at her. Aisling only nodded in return. "Try and get some sleep, we'll talk more in the morning."

He then left the room and Aisling leaned over, resting her head in her hands. She felt ridiculous for telling Liam, knowing he wouldn't believe her, but she had hoped. She breathed in and out slowly and then looked up and around her room.

"It was real," she whispered into the darkness. "It had to be."

OOOO

A couple weeks later, Aisling collapsed in her chair in her office, rubbing her temples. She had just had a meeting with Tiernan, Liam and the other vice presidents about the potential merger that she had barely paid attention to. Both of her cousins - and her therapist - had tried to convince her to take off more time, but Aisling felt it was better to throw herself back into her work.

It was the fastest way to get back to normal, in her mind.

Though she was still having dreams every night about Hal and the others. She stopped mentioning this to Liam, not wanting to worry him more than he already was. And well, in her last session, she had to admit that Dr. Waters had made some logical points. And the neurologist that Liam had made her see. That it was possible for her to have vivid dreams while in a coma that would appear real, but really weren't.

And as more time passed, Aisling had to admit that she was starting to wonder if it had been real. But then she would get upset with herself and feel guilty. But it didn't seem to change the fact that the longer she was home, the more she began to wonder if she really was losing it.

Sensing a presence, Aisling looked over, finding Tiernan standing in the doorway, his face unreadable save for his eyes, which were full of concern. She jumped, for a moment seeing Thranduil, but then shook her head.

"What's up?" she asked, pasting a smile on her face.

Tiernan took a deep breath and walked in, shutting the door behind him and sitting in one of the chairs on the other side of her desk. She felt more nervous the longer he was silent, unsure of what he was about to say.

"I think you should take the rest of the week off," he finally said. Aisling frowned and shook her head.

"No, I want to be here. And I'm so behind," she said, turning to her computer and pulling up a press release she had been drafting before the meeting. It was taking longer than she liked.

God, she felt so rusty at something that used to come to her so easily.

"We can handle this, Ash. The more important thing is that you get better," Tiernan said.

"I'm not sick," she said sternly, whipping her head around to glare at him. "I'm fine."

Tiernan stared at her a few moments before leaning over and rubbing his face, his cool, boss facade falling away. Aisling couldn't help as her eyes widened a bit. He must be worried if he was allowing it to show at the office.

"Tell me what I can do," he said, finally looking up at her. "I want to help you, but I don't know how to do that. Liam says you're still not sleeping well."

"I was asleep for 12 days. Think maybe I don't need a whole lot right now," she retorted without thinking. Tiernan winced and looked away, the guilt creeping into his eyes. Shit, she hadn't meant to make it sound like it was his fault. It wasn't. She swallowed.

"I'm seeing the therapist, I… it just takes time," she said, her voice softer. Tiernan looked over at her. "Really, you're already doing a lot for me. I'm fine. Or, at least… I will be."

He stared at her a few moments before sighing.

"Are you sure that you're ready to be back?" he asked. "We can get by without you if you want more time." Aisling shook her head quickly.

"I think it's better that I'm back at work. Gives me something I can focus on," she urged. And it did. She was worried without work and the gala, she wouldn't have much else to really ground her here.

And she really hated how worried she was making Tiernan and Liam right now.

He smiled and nodded slightly, then stood and walked towards the door. He stopped and looked back at her.

"Seriously, let me know if you need something or need help," he said before leaving.

Aisling sighed and sat back in her chair, reaching down to pull off her heels and dump them under her desk. She took a moment to look around her office.

The main office for the company had always been located in the very first hotel that her great-grandfather had purchased, though it had been renovated several times since then. The latest had been a few years ago, though they had only done a bit of a facelift, allowing the building's art deco renovation to shine through. The walls were dark blue with gold accents that normally made her feel calm, a few photos up of her with her cousins and then her with her parents.

She stood and turned, walking up to the windows that looked out over the busy street below. Normally she loved the view, but now she wished with all her heart she could be back among the trees of Lorien. But just as quickly, the guilt came back.

She had her time with Haldir. And hopefully she would get that chance again. But for now, she needed to be here. Her cousins needed her focused and working at her best, not half-heartedly going through the motions. More than that, she needed it. To feel normal again. Closing her eyes for a moment, she took another deep breath, her mind filling with the image of Hal smiling at her.

"I'm sorry… I need to put you aside for now," she whispered.

She then opened her eyes and looked at the street then turned and walked back to her desk. It was time to get to work.

OOOO

UPDATE 1.22.2021 - Okay, so the updates in this chapter were mainly adding in Toto, because I realized I completely forgot about the dog...

OOOO

As you can see, Aisling is now back in "was it all a dream?" territory. Which is exactly where I want her. Full explanation in the next chapter...

Thanks for reading!