Stuck
"Good evening everyone, the library will be closed in half an hour. Please make your way to the front exit. Thank you."
Hearing the announcement, Miranda Bailey shook her head. This was the one weekend that she had completely free. And she'd been reading in a private room in the old library sitting in an armchair reading all day long. Her legs were crossed and her blue dress flowed along her thighs. She'd only left the room to get some food and to go to the bathroom. And it had been lovely. Her six-year-old son, Tuck, was with her ex-husband and instead of staying cooped up in the house, she decided to come to the library and relax. It was like a spa day. And there were so many books to read. Books she had never even heard of much less had time to read. But she was halfway through a novel now and had started a dozen others. But in thirty minutes, her beautiful day would soon come to an end. Soon, she'd be back at home and what? Exactly. Doing nothing but being bored. Maybe she could sneak into the hospital and scour the board for a surgery, like she used to do. No, that wouldn't work, this was supposed to be a work-free weekend. She'd earned it. Miranda ignored the announcement and kept reading.
"Gooooood evening, the library will be closed in fifteen minutes. Please bring all books that you want to check out to the front or make your way to the exit. Once again, the library will be closed in fifteen minutes. Thank you."
Ben Warren lifted his head from a book, bringing the page that was attached to his face with him. He'd fallen asleep in the stacks. At least he'd made a dent in his research—kind of. He was making a big decision soon. It would be life-altering and he needed every bit of information he could find. He had to make the right choice. Yawning, he rubbed his hands on his black jeans waking his body up. He closed the book and walked into a random aisle, pushing some of the books onto a dusty shelf, silently apologizing to whoever would have to put them in their proper place. After gathering his things, Ben headed toward the elevator. Pushing the button, someone walked up beside him. The elevator arrived on the top floor of the library. He held the rickety doors and allowed the other person to walk ahead of him. Pushing the "L" button, he turned to speak, being polite. "Evening," he said looking at them. Seeing his ex-girlfriend, Miranda, he turned red and almost panicked.
"Howdy, folks, the library will be closed in five minutes. Five minutes. We open tomorrow morning at eight o'clock. And I'm not nice like everyone else, I will lock you up in here, okay? Thank youuuu."
Miranda chuckled at the voice above her head. She stopped soon after when she remembered the person standing next to her. Was that really Ben? The man whose heart she'd broken, unintentionally and for the best of reasons, in her opinion. She glanced over and, for some reason, she was surprised to still see him. "Hello, Benjamin," she said trying to keep her voice strong. His name felt strange in her mouth. She hadn't said it in almost two months. Hadn't talked to him in twice as long. "Miranda. I… didn't think I'd see you here." She scoffed before saying, "I brought you here first. This is my spot." He nodded. "You did." "How are you?" She asked before she could swallow the question. "I'm good." The elevator dinged as they stopped on the second floor. The doors didn't open.
"The library is now closed. If you're still in here. You'll still be here when we open in the morning. Goodnight."
"Wait," Ben said pushing the button for the lobby again although it was already lit. They heard the lights shut off and Miranda dropped her bag. "You've got to be shitting me!" She shouted. Ben whipped around. "Sorry. I'm just pissed and hungry." He smirked. Miranda never used foul language unless… he shook the thought from his head. That was another time, another them. "Relax," he told her pushing the emergency button. "No one's going to hear it if they're gone." "It won't hurt," he replied over his shoulder. "Why don't you try calling the police or the fire department?" Ben watched her reach into her pocket, feeling for her phone. "Don't tell me you left it somewhere." "Then I won't tell you that," she spat. Her semi-angry face was so gorgeous, even though the look was directed at him, he wanted to hug her. "You still haven't learned to keep up with your devices." He shook his head as she hit him gently.
She wouldn't lie, their back and forth reminded her of good times. Miranda searched her bag for her phone. "Oh, it's still plugged up in the room up there." Ben sighed and pulled out his phone, handing it to her. "You remember the code?" He asked. Her heart fluttered. Of course, she did. She tapped the power button. "Your phone's dead." Ben took it from her. "It's n—damn it." Miranda laughed and Ben harmonized with his own. She sat down in the corner of the elevator. "This is… unbelievable," she said as he sat opposite her. For the first time, she was able to take in his entire face. He was still so handsome. When he caught her staring, she looked away.
Why was she looking at him like that? "What?" Miranda demanded. He cocked his head to the side. "Nothing. I just… haven't seen you in a long time," he admitted. That wasn't entirely true. Sometimes he sat in the gallery when she did surgery, slipping out just before she finished. Seeing her face always made him feel better. Pulling him from his thoughts, Miranda asked: "Are we really stuck?" He nodded. "I guess." "What are the odds that not only do we get trapped in an elevator, we get trapped with each other?" Her realization made him chuckle. They were quiet for a long time and Ben practiced questions in his head to ask her. He wanted to know everything. There was so much Ben missed about being with her. He'd really thought they were meant to be and would eventually marry—that's how well their relationship had been. He wanted to ask if she still liked to sleep under the covers no matter how hot it was. Or if her refrigerator had her emergency pint of salted caramel. But there was one that burned his brain… Did she still love him?
"Tuck asked about you a few weeks ago," Miranda said after a long period of silence. "Yeah?" His face brightened. Ben and Tuck had been good friends. Their breakup had kind of ruined that and Miranda felt bad. "Yes. And I didn't know what to tell him." "Well, what was the question?" Miranda's cheek reddened and she put her hand to shield her face. "He wanted to know if you were going to come back over." It had been out of the blue and thrown her for a loop. Miranda had stammered through an answer and was thankful when her ex-husband had knocked on the door. "Well, if you're cool with it, maybe the two of us, or the three of us, could hang out one day. I wouldn't want him to think I've forgotten about him." Miranda clenched her jaw. "Because I haven't, Miranda. I haven't forgotten." She picked up her bag and began rummaging through it. What she was looking for, she probably couldn't find in there.
He hadn't meant for that to sound so… desperate. Was that the right word? Ben scratched his head. "Do you, uh, have any gum in your Mary Poppins bag?" He asked. Miranda glared at him and he grinned. "Just for that, no, I don't." He stood up and moved next to her. "Don't act like you don't have everything in that bag." "I don't have my phone," she said with so much sass that he had a flashback to a time when if she'd made a comment like that, he'd attack her with kisses, tickling her. Those little pockets of joy between them were things Ben had never experienced before Miranda and definitely hadn't after. He sighed. "Hellooo?" Miranda was holding out a piece of gum for him. "Thanks, babe," he said. Damn it, Ben.
"Don't," she said softly. "I didn't mean it. If literally just slipped," Ben told her. "Old habits." Miranda rolled her eyes. "Try to contain your habits, will you?" She unwrapped a piece of gum and put it to her lips. They chewed their gum and sat quietly. There was so much that needed to be said and Miranda just preferred to not say anything. Instead, she opened a book and started to read. Ben did the same. He slouched, his leg pushing against her. "My bad." "That's okay," she said. She snuck a look at him. His hand beneath his chin meant that he was really concentrating on the material. Miranda smiled. "And what is it that you're looking at?"
He cut his eyes at her playfully. Ben loved seeing the great Miranda Bailey squirm. "I'm not even looking at you." She yawned. "Tired?" He asked. Her voice was slow and unwilling when she said: "Yes." He patted his lap. "C'mon, rest your head." "I'm not that tired." Ben laughed. He missed this. He missed them. "Fine. Here." He touched his shoulder. "Thanks for the offer, but I'll lean my head against this—" "Old and dusty ass wall?" Ben finished for her. She faced him, her hand grazing his leg. His body jumped. "I don't want you getting any ideas." "Ideas about what?" "Us." His heart was racing now. "Is there an us?"
A lump formed in her throat as they both waited for her to answer. Miranda tried pushing it down, but it was immovable. "Miranda?" Ben's voice snatched her from her thoughts. "We broke up." "I didn't want to," he told her grabbing her hand. She hadn't wanted to either. But too much had happened for her to feel like she could give him what he needed in a relationship. She was being fair. She did it for them. Hadn't she? "I needed to." Miranda pulled her hand away and wiped a tear that had magically appeared. Damn emotions. She exhaled. "Even now. Do we have to keep resisting?" Ben asked. Why did he have to ask that?
"I'm not resisting," she replied, her tone was soft and even. He knew it so well. "Okay, are you, uh, seeing anyone?" Miranda shook her head. Ben's heart rejoiced. "Not anymore." "Wait, you were seeing someone? What about the tape and the glue and the…?" She reached for his hand. And she must have realized what she was doing because she pulled it back. "I used him as a kind of adhesive. Like a, um, bandage." He watched her poke her lips out and the only thing on his mind was how much he wanted to kiss her. Ben closed his eyes briefly. "Did you?" Miranda asked. He opened his eyes, confused. "Did I what?" "Did you see anyone else? Are you seeing someone?" Ben inhaled. He wanted to lie. He wanted to say no and that would be the fastest and easiest route back into her arms. "Ben?" "Yes."
Miranda felt her heart plunge. "Nothing serious." She pursed her lips and squinted at him. "Hey! Don't look at me like that. Please." Miranda softened her gaze. "I was just trying to get over you." Thinking about her short-lived fling, she nodded. "I guess I was, too." "Did it work?" His question was sincere and she moved the book from her lap, shaking her head from side to side. "He didn't touch me the way you did," she confessed, looking at the floor. Maybe it was the situation—being stuck in the elevator with the man of her dreams, but Miranda couldn't believe she was telling him this. She'd kept her feelings about Ben locked in a vault since she'd pushed him away. "I'll be honest," he started, his brown eyes meeting her brown eyes, "no other woman made me feel the way you used to. Emotionally, mentally, physically." Ben's admission made heat rise between her legs and she cleared her throat, looking away once more.
"Really?" She prodded. Ben rubbed his hands together. He cursed silently. Why couldn't he have been her bandage? Why didn't she run back to him instead of to another man? Why had he? So much time had been wasted. "You had to have felt something for them," she replied angrily. Was that an accusation? "I didn't. It was just sex. Nothing more." "Just sex?" Concern was written all over her face. "Yes, not even good sex." He chuckled and she smiled. "In the on-call room?" Ben tilted is head to the side. "She doesn't work at the hospital." "Are you saying that keep me from finding her?" They laughed loudly. "No, no, nothing like that." Quiet filled the elevator car. "Didn't you miss me?" Ben asked at the same time Miranda was saying: "I never got over you." They looked at each other. Her soft eyes made his organ rise and he shuddered a little. "I never got over you," she repeated.
Did she really just say that? Out loud? For him to hear? Twice?! Miranda's stomach and heart were jockeying for first place to make her sick. "I mean…" Ben picked up her hand. "I never got over you either. I will never get over you," he said tenderly. He ran his other hand from the top of her head to her chin, hooking it and pulling her face closer. "We can't… we're broken up… we're not together," Miranda mused. "Ben…" "Yes?" He would be patient. He wouldn't rush. This she already knew. He was Ben. Her Ben. But was she ready for whatever was around the corner? He put his forehead against hers, waiting. "I miss you," he told her. "So much." Finally, she was able to swallow the lump. "I love you." Who the hell was pulling her string? Why was she saying these things? Ben smiled. "I love you, too."
Ben pulled the gum from his mouth and put it on the back of the wooden handrail above their heads. He held out his hand. "No, that's nasty," Miranda countered. He kept it out and with a roll of her eyes, she dropped her piece onto his palm. After discarding it, he inched toward her. His woman. "So, you love me?" He said with a grin. She would later call it "cocky," but he was confident. Ben had never stopped dreaming of this day. The day he'd get her back. "I think we have a lot to discuss and love is just the tip of the—" Ben pressed his lips to Miranda's, silencing her. His entire body was tingly with excitement. She touched his chest and pushed him a little. "Yes?" He asked lifting an eyebrow. "I am not having sex with you in this elevator," she told him. "Okay, baby." He grabbed the back of her head, pulling her hair gingerly. Slipping his tongue into her mouth, she moaned. "But there are no cameras. And there is no one here." Miranda shook her head. "We're just getting reacquainted. We were seeing other people and we're rebounding." "No, see, they were the rebounds. Not us. I'm in love with you. And I will wait if you want to, but I want you so bad I can't even see straight right now." She laughed, falling into his chest. "I want you, too."
Common sense was gone out of the window. The combination of Ben sitting there giving her "the look" plus good timing multiplied by good fortune was making her woozy. Miranda eased her leg over his body. He held her waist and snuck a hand between her legs, past her panties and into her overly moist entrance. Her chest caved as his fingers swam around expertly. She'd spent weeks on weeks having sex with another man just trying to feel as good as she was feeling now—and the two of them hadn't even gotten started yet. Ben removed his hand and touched her bottom lip. "I thought about you every day," he said. She grabbed the front of his pants. "I thought about you, too. I wanted to call you," she whispered. He placed kisses on her neck. "You should have." She stroked him and he put his head back saying, "Shit!" Miranda laughed. "Damn, you're beautiful," he told her. "Thank you." Another tear fell from her eyes as they stared at each other, not moving, not talking, just breathing and taking it all in.
She broke their eye contact first. "I don't have any c-condoms," she said holding the back of his head. Ben's brain sputtered. "I could just pull out," he offered. Miranda moved from on top of him, leaving him grasping at the air. "This is a mistake." She stood up and fixed her dress and wiped her face. Ben stood up, straightening his clothes as well. "What's a mistake?" He asked staying on his side of the elevator. "This." He shook his head. What was she talking about? Sex? Or their relationship? "Everything," Miranda answered reading his mind. He crossed the invisible line and walked over to her. "You're doing it again, Miranda." "Doing what?" She snapped. "Pulling away. Don't do that, baby." She looked up at him. "What if it blows up again?" Miranda asked. He inhaled and hugged her, kissing the top of her head. "We won't let that happen again, alright? There is nothing our love can't overcome." "You make it sound so good and so simple." Ben smiled and they sat back down in their original spaces. "It is." He pulled her back into his arms and she straddled him. "We still don't have condoms," he reminded her as they kissed easily.
Miranda lowered herself onto Ben and shut her eyes so tightly, she saw constellations. She rocked her hips slowly. "Damn," she breathed. He squeezed her ass through her dress. "How does that feel?" She asked, hoping that he felt as good as she did. "So… fucking… good," he told her bringing her in for another kiss. "You?" Miranda couldn't catch her breath enough to answer so she nodded. He laughed in her ear. "Did he kiss you like I do?" Shaking her head, she scratched the back of his head, digging her nails into his neck and scalp. "Did he stroke you like this, Miranda? Huh?" Ben asked biting her earlobe. "No, baby," Miranda whimpered, five minutes from her orgasm. She put her lips on his, trying to quiet him. Anymore talking and she'd explode and she wanted to savor their first time since breaking up. She grinned, happy that they were together again. At least that's what she thought had happened. "Miranda?" "Yes, Benjamin?" She responded pulling back to look at him. "Is this pussy mine?" Miranda blushed hard. He was doing that on purpose. "Shut up." He laughed, slapping her ass and kissing her neck again, moving down to her chest. They were quiet, whining and grunting. "Was hers as good as mine?"
Ben's mouth dropped open. She never countered when he spoke dirty to her. It turned him on and his hips rose from the floor. "No, baby. No," he reassured her through deep groans, "this is all for you." Ben felt himself about to come and held Miranda, kissing her as he pumped faster. "Slow down, baby," she whined. "Slow, Benjamin." He nodded, listening to her soothing voice. "I love you, Benjamin Warren." "I love you, too, Miranda Bailey." She reached up and held onto the railing above them as she came softly, "Oh God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!" Ben started to push her off as he neared his climax. She shook her head. "You're sure?" He asked, his mind filled with pictures of the future of them. With kids. With grandkids? Happy and full of adoration. Grabbing his face, she peered into his eyes: "I'm sure." Ben moved quickly, orgasming into her. They kissed passionately, in no rush at all.
Miranda lay against Ben's chest as he smoothed her hair. She looked up to see him looking down at her. Her entire heart was full. She was satisfied and in love and—she had to pee. "I can't believe we've defiled the library." Ben grinned. "No one will ever know." "Hopefully not. Because now I feel dirty." The two of them talked, getting to know each other again. "How long have we been in here?" She asked. He shrugged. "A couple of hours. We have a long way to go until someone comes in." He made circles on her arm the way he used to do and it made her feel at home. "What does this mean? Really?" Miranda sighed and waited for his reply. "You are mine," he said calmly. "I'm yours and that's… that's all we need to know." A smile crossed her lips. "You are so in love with me," she laughed. The evidence was all there; Ben didn't even have to respond. She could tell by the way he was holding her, how he'd said her name while they made love. "You're right. I am in love with you." Miranda tilted her head and kissed his chin. "I'm in love with you, too."
Being wrapped in Miranda's arms again was a gift from God. Ben had prayed for this. She was his one true love and the only person that made his heart pound just at the sight of her. "We need to figure something out because I have to use the bathroom," he said. "Me too," she echoed. Ben kissed her head and stood up. "What are you doing?" Miranda asked. "Thinking." "We stopped on the second floor," he said. "Right, so we're not between floors." He snapped his fingers. "And this building is old, I might be able to..." He stopped talking and stood in front of the doors. Ben stuck his fingers into the crack of the doors. "Be careful, sweetie." He couldn't contain a smile. "I will." It took a little elbow grease, but in just a few minutes, the door was open. "What the hell?" She exclaimed jumping up. She picked up their stuff and they walked out of the elevator. "I cannot believe it took all of two minutes." He shook his head. "It may have felt like two minutes, but my arms say otherwise." "Want a massage?" She asked looking up at him. "Do not tease me, woman." Miranda shrugged. "Fine then." "Okay, yes! I want whatever it is that you'll give me." He wiggled his eyebrows at her.
"Oh, no! That was a one-time thing," Miranda. "That we'll never talk about. Ever." Ben pouted. "I don't care. We should not have done that… here." She walked toward the bathrooms. In the creepily empty room, she took her time, processing everything that had happened. Sex in the elevator was fun—she would cross that off her sex bucket list. But sex with an ex… though Ben wasn't just any ex, he was The One. She knew it, he knew it, they'd talked about it once before everything got messed up and discombobulated. When she returned, he asked: "So, did we only hook up because we were stuck?" That question had been in her mind, too. Was that the only reason? "I don't know," she said, exasperatedly, "maybe." He dropped his books onto a table. "But you do want to be together, right?" There was so much fear in his voice, her body shook. "Of course!" Now, she was near tears. "Yes, I do." She wanted what they'd once had; but that was a different time. Miranda and Ben had to find themselves again with each other. It would take patience and would be difficult but it would be worth it, wouldn't it?
Ben stared at Miranda and watched her glassy eyes blink back tears. She really did love him. He hugged her tightly. She was the love of his life. He knew it, she knew it. And when they'd talked about it, her smile had literally lit up the entire room. Despite the tough exterior she tried to put on for everyone, she loved love and melted at romance. "Ben?" "Yes?" "What are you thinking about so hard?" She inquired. "Love." She slid her arms around his waist. "You're in love?" He nodded. "With whom?" "Just the most amazing woman I've ever met. No big deal." They laughed. "Let's try to get out of here," he said. "Ready when you are."
Four Years & Some Months Later
"I'm not ready," Miranda said. Ben grabbed her face and put their foreheads together. "It's time, babe," he told her. She shook her head. "We've been sitting here for fifteen minutes." "So?" "So, you did this with Tuck and now we don't have time for it with Tyra," her husband laughed. "Okay. Okay." "Plus, we have to go in and drop her off and you have surgery in an hour and I have to get my orientation." Hearing that, she allowed Ben to kiss her. After wiping her eyes with a napkin, she got out of the car. He unclipped their daughter from her car seat and Miranda bent down to kiss the top of the girl's head. "Ready for your first day of Kindergarten, baby?" She asked the girl. The three-year-old nodded, her twists bouncing about. The girl owned her. "Soft" didn't even begin to describe how she felt looking at her. And that went for Tuck, too. Ten and light of her life, she cried when he'd disappeared behind the school doors. "Say, 'Yes, mommy'," Ben told her. "Yes, mommy," Tyra repeated. Miranda put her head back, hoping to get the tears to flow back into her tear ducts. No such luck. She was so emotional.
Ben took deep breaths, that's how he kept the tears from falling. He'd done it watching ten-year-old Tuck walk off into the school without any assistance from them. Just a hug and a wave he was gone. Now, his youngest was going to school for the first time. "Emotional" didn't even begin to describe how he was feeling. He and his wife flanked their daughter and followed the hoard of parents and students going into the small building. In front of her classroom door, Tyra was already tearing up and Miranda had a look on her face. "Maybe I could just take her with me. Just for today." "Unh-uh. Because then it's 'I'll take her with me tomorrow' and we can't have that." He knelt down. "So, you're going to be a big girl for mommy and daddy, right, baby?" Tyra shook her head, holding on to Miranda's leg. "Yes," he nodded. Tyra mimicked him. "Yes, daddy." "Right, and you're going to have so much fun and meet some friends and your teachers are nice, too." The girl threw her arms around him and he squeezed gently. Miranda and Ben walked with her inside of the classroom. "Welcome," the teacher said. Tyra saw a ball bouncing and took off after it. "I guess she's good," Ben said out loud. "She'll be fine," the teacher said with a wave. In the car, Ben sat under the steering wheel. "I can't believe we just left her there," Miranda said. Ben glanced at her out of the corner of his eye and they cracked up. "You're a mess." "Well, hon, you knew what you were getting into when you said, 'I Do'," she told him turning away from him. He reached for her hand and kissed it. "That is so true, my love."
