The Mess Hall seemed quiet as they approached but that was no surprise. They were extremely late and they would just barely have enough time to eat and get out to the training field.
When they rounded the corner, Aubrey's eyes immediately scanned the tables and she was surprised to see Erwin still in his seat with Hange beside him.
She tugged on Levi's hand and pulled him across the room. She wanted to know why they'd stuck around.
When they finally arrived, Aubrey's eyes met Erwin's and he smiled up at her.
"Good morning."
Aubrey couldn't help but smile back.
"Good morning, Erwin."
"How did you sleep?"
Aubrey's smile fell away. She didn't really want to think about Levi's recurring bouts of grief if she didn't have to.
"Fine, thank you." She quickly decided to change the topic. "Why are you two still here? Isn't training going to start soon?"
Erwin nodded.
"Yes, but we decided to wait for you."
Aubrey's brows furrowed.
"What? Why?"
This time Hange was the one to answer.
"Because we have questions."
The air went cold and Aubrey went quiet. She hadn't been expecting that.
"She already told you everything you need to know."
Aubrey turned to Levi, a little shocked that he'd joined into the conversation and a little more shocked at his sudden protectiveness.
His eyes were hard and his lips were twisted into a mean frown.
Aubrey squeezed his hand, trying to reassure him.
"No, it's okay." Aubrey was speaking to everyone but her eyes were still on Levi.
He turned to her, his gaze smoldering with intensity. He didn't like the idea of her having to drag up painful memories if she wasn't ready. The others had no right to cause her that kind of discomfort.
Aubrey stared back at him, trying to convey that it really was okay. She didn't really want to discuss her childhood again but she'd decided to stop hiding it. And, if Erwin and Hange had questions she'd rather just answer them straight away.
Erwin watched carefully as the two of them engaged in their little staring contest. He could almost see the communication flying back and forth as they both struggled to gain the upper hand.
Hange had noticed too and her eyes were glued to them as she wondered how they could be so adept at speaking silently.
Finally, Levi couldn't take it anymore. He scoffed and tore his gaze from hers. If she really wanted to tell them then that was her choice. He'd just have to step in again if something went too far.
"Fine. Food first."
Aubrey didn't even have time to respond before he dragged her away to the food tables.
As soon as they got there he shoved a tray in her hands and waited to see that she was filling it before finally picking up a plate for himself.
Levi moved more quickly than her and by the time she'd finished, he had already secured a cup of hot water for her. She glowered at it. The idea of tasting the tea again was revolting. But it had to be done.
Levi waited for her to start walking and then followed her back to the table, never straying more than two feet from her side.
When they finally reached their seats, Levi slid in beside her and placed the cup of water on her left.
Aubrey looked up at him, a desperate expression covering her face. She wasn't sure what kinds of questions she was about to be asked and she was silently asking for his support.
His eyes immediately softened and Aubrey felt his hand on her thigh beneath the table. She sighed, grateful to have his touch grounding her.
Levi tilted his head toward her tray. Eat.
Aubrey followed his instruction, picking up her spoon and taking a bite of her oatmeal. As soon as she swallowed, she took a deep breath and turned her attention back to Erwin.
"What do you want to know?"
Erwin was unable to answer for a second. He'd been too focused on the way Aubrey and Levi had been displaying such a silent connection. Last night, he'd known they were close, but from their actions this morning it almost seemed like they'd known each other for years.
Finally, he managed to pull himself back to the present and ask his first question.
"I'd like to know more about your… training."
Aubrey saw Levi's eyes shoot to Erwin, a death glare forming in his eyes. She grabbed his hand beneath the table and shoved it into her pocket. He could focus on getting the plants ready. Maybe he'd stop looking like he wanted to kill someone if he had a distraction.
"What about it?"
Aubrey's plan worked and Levi turned to stare at her. His expression had shifted from murderous to surprised and she knew he'd be occupied for at least a few minutes. Perhaps she could even multitask and teach him how to make the tea.
Erwin was stunned again by their closeness but this time he was able to respond more quickly.
"I'd like to know what drills you did, how long you practiced every day, what your focuses were, all of it."
Aubrey processed his question as she saw Levi place the plants on the table. He was still scowling at Erwin, but it wasn't as intense as before.
Aubrey pointed to the familiar white flower and then to an inconspicuous looking weed.
"Three of these petals and then one of those leaves, please."
She moved the glass of hot water in front of him and then returned her attention to Erwin.
"Can I ask why you want to know this?"
Erwin was once again distracted by the directions Aubrey had given to Levi and Hange was growing impatient. She decided to answer for him.
"We want to know if those methods can be applied to our training here."
Aubrey sighed. She had a feeling it would be something like that. She shook her head.
"I'll tell you but I'm not sure my information will be of any use. My abilities are a result of abuse and terror. Those tactics should not be used on anyone."
Aubrey briefly turned back to Levi.
"Two of these, one of these, and one of these." Her fingers gestured to a few more plants before Hange spoke up again.
"We know that, but maybe we can… alter the methods to be more… humane."
Aubrey frowned but she decided to tell them anyway. Maybe they'd be able to see something she couldn't.
"Well, my foundation was always centered in strength and balance. I spent hours in a balance swing and my father would push me in hand to hand combat until I threw up. Then he'd make me get up and keep going."
Aubrey was almost grateful when she felt the familiar surge of anger go through her at the mention of her father. She'd rather be angry than upset. She wasn't in the mood to cry before training.
The table went silent but Aubrey wasn't fazed. She looked at what was left of the plants.
"Two of these, and one of these. And that's all."
She turned back to Hange, waiting for the next question.
Hange recognized that she had Aubrey's attention and forced herself out of her stupor to continue.
"U-um… and what about your hand to hand combat? What kind of training did you do for that?"
"You ask too many questions, four eyes."
Levi angrily slid the finished tea into Aubrey's hand as everyone turned to look at him.
Aubrey's mouth popped open.
"Levi! Don't be rude!"
She elbowed him in the ribs but he barely reacted.
"Tch. There's no point to this. There's no such thing as adapting torture."
The table went quiet again. Levi had a point.
Finally, Erwin spoke up for the first time since Hange's takeover.
"Levi's right. Perhaps we didn't think this all the way through. I'm sorry for even asking, Aubrey."
Aubrey was about to object but Levi closed the subject before she could even open her mouth.
"Good. Glad we agree. Now, Aubrey, eat."
She looked to him, still not quite convinced. Maybe Erwin and Hange would have been able to see something she couldn't. But in her heart, she knew that wasn't true. Levi was right. There was no way to adapt torture.
Her attention turned back to her tray and she took another bite of oatmeal, washing it down with a gulp of tea that she tried not to taste.
Everything was silent for a long time until Erwin finally cleared his throat. He knew they were done discussing any kind of training but he did have some other news to tell them.
"Aubrey. I have someone going through the records today. The change should be complete by tonight."
Aubrey froze. She knew she'd asked for the change but hearing that it was in motion was… jarring. Once it had been made, her father would be able to see her name on any of the public records. He'd be able to walk right on to base and ask for her if he wanted to.
She shook herself from her trance. She knew how unlikely that was so there was no point in thinking about. Instead, she decided to focus on the idea that she was finally taking back her identity, that she would no longer be no one. Both literally and figuratively.
Aubrey thought back to the rest of their conversation from the night before and suddenly she remembered that she had her own news to share.
"Thank you, Erwin. And, um, there's actually something we need to tell you."
Erwin quickly recognized the reference to 'we'.
"Ah, you've chosen a room?"
Hange jumped in her seat and Aubrey had to fight to contain a smile. She'd forgotten that her friend didn't know about their moving.
"Yes."
Erwin raised an eyebrow.
"Can I ask which one?"
Now Aubrey really couldn't contain her smile and a grin spread across her face.
"The Commander's Suite."
Aubrey was pretty sure she saw Hange choke on nothing.
Erwin just chuckled.
"I guess I should have known."
Aubrey leaned forward, her eyes widening. She'd hoped that Erwin would let them have the room but there was always the possibility of him saying no, especially when it was so luxurious.
"You'll let us take it, then?"
Erwin smiled back at her.
"Well I'm not using it, am I?"
Aubrey couldn't contain herself. She sprang from her seat, rushing around the table to place a kiss on his cheek.
"Thank you, Erwin."
He shook his head.
"There's no need to thank me. You deserve it."
Aubrey embraced him, nearly squealing with excitement. She turned to Levi and saw that even he had his lips turned up at the corners. In Levi terms he was practically jumping up and down.
She moved back to him, grabbing his hand and yanking him out of his seat.
Her eyes went to Erwin again.
"Well, let's go. We're all late."
Erwin chuckled again but did as she said and stood from his seat. Aubrey watched as Hange scrambled to her feet, a shocked expression still on her features.
"I'm actually headed back to my office. Saru knows you're coming. If you have any issues you know where to find me."
Aubrey was a bit saddened that he wouldn't be joining them but she didn't let it ruin her mood.
"Thank you again, Erwin. For everything."
Erwin nodded and as he walked past her, his hand gently patted the top of her head. Aubrey watched him disappear from the Mess Hall. Hange followed closely behind him and Aubrey deduced that she'd probably be working on research today instead of participating in training. She made a mental note to find her friend later. It'd been far too long since they talked. Plus, she'd have to apologize for Levi calling her 'four eyes'. She couldn't believe he'd said that. Or maybe she could.
As soon as they were out of sight, Aubrey turned back to Levi.
"Okay, let's-"
"One more."
She was cut off when Levi pressed her teacup into her hands. She looked down to see that there was one last gulp remaining. She groaned.
Levi just pressed the cup further into her grip.
She gathered her willpower and managed to get the rest of the tea down in one swallow.
Levi took the cup from her and gathered their empty trays, moving to the back of the room to discard them.
Aubrey watched after him, a small frown on her lips. They'd have to leave the Mess Hall now and start training. And that meant facing the Special Ops squad. Aubrey cringed. She didn't expect them to be very happy with her after she'd abandoned them during the expedition.
"Oi."
Aubrey heard Levi's voice ring out and she was brought back to the present.
He'd already returned to her and she was surprised to see a concerned look on his face.
"What's wrong?"
Aubrey realized that she was still frowning. She sighed.
"Nothing, I just… don't think my squad is going to be very happy with me. I, um, abandoned them on the expedition."
Levi went silent. He could guess why she'd left her squad behind. He reached for her hand and pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her back. He couldn't express to her how thankful he was that she had abandoned her squad back then. If she hadn't… who knows what he would've done.
Aubrey pressed into him, her forehead leaning on his shoulder. She stayed there for a moment before pulling back and shaking her head. She couldn't think about that right now. They had places to be, people to see. Plus, Levi's whole purpose for coming to training had been to escape his thoughts about the past. She needed to change their focus.
She placed her hands on his cheeks and pulled him in for a quick kiss before speaking.
"I'm sure everything will be fine. Besides, they'll probably be too scared of you to even notice I'm there."
Levi scoffed and Aubrey was happy to feel that her ridiculous statement had lightened the air around them.
"But we do have to go now."
Levi huffed and moved back. His hand found hers and he allowed her to lead them out of the Mess Hall and on to the training field.
Everyone was already in their squads, nearly ready to begin the day. Aubrey scanned the groups, looking for any sign of Special Ops. Her eyes finally landed on Chris and she paused, turning back to Levi.
"Ready?"
He nodded.
Aubrey untangled their fingers. She figured he probably wouldn't want to be holding her hand for introductions. It didn't really fit his 'scary' branding. He raised an eyebrow at her action but didn't say anything.
Aubrey took one last look at him, reaching up to brush a lock of hair from his eyes. Then, she drew her attention back to Chris, seeing the rest of the squad surrounding her.
"Let's go, then."
Aubrey took off and Levi followed close behind her.
As soon as they neared the group, Aubrey felt Saru's eyes piercing through her. She swallowed. She'd been right about them being mad. She was probably going to get ripped to shreds by the Captain.
They finally came to a stop and the entire squad turned to stare at them. Aubrey glanced at Chris, noticing that her friend looked overly concerned. Aubrey wasn't sure if it was because Saru was about to ream her out or if she was still upset by what had happened during the expedition. It was probably both.
"So you two finally decided to show up, huh?"
Saru was looking them up and down, an unamused expression covering her face.
Aubrey swallowed.
"Sorry, Captain. We, uh, got held up in the Mess Hall."
Saru arched an eyebrow. She obviously didn't care what their excuse was. She was going to be annoyed no matter what.
"Right. Where's your gear?"
Saru's eyes went to their waists, realizing that they had no 3DMG, just straps.
Aubrey cleared her throat.
"Um, we'll be using some spares today, Captain."
Aubrey hadn't wanted to lug the gear into the forest and around the grounds so she'd left it in their room this morning. Now, the disgusted look Saru was giving them was making her regret her decision.
"Fine, but make sure you get it on quick. I've already waited long enough for you two."
Saru finally shifted her eyes to Levi.
"You. Levi, right? We're going to do introductions first. Chris, you're up."
Aubrey glanced at Levi, seeing that he looked utterly bored with the idea of introducing himself. Nonetheless, he didn't put up a fight.
Chirs stepped forward hesitantly, her eyes still concerned but with an added glimmer of curiosity. She shifted nervously for a second and then spoke up.
"I'm Chris. Nice to meet you."
She extended her hand and Levi stared down at it. Aubrey nudged him. If he was going to be nice to anyone here, it should be Chris. She was the most decent person on the squad.
Levi shot Aubrey an irritated glance but his hand eventually moved forward.
"Levi."
Aubrey watched as they loosely shook hands. Chris smiled but it faded quickly when she saw that Levi was maintaining his neutral expression. Aubrey sighed. That was the best she was going to get out of him.
Saru noticed that their interaction had come to an end and quickly called Lena forward. The introductions continued but Aubrey didn't force Levi to shake anyone else's hand. Lena had always been blunt with her and Jacob and Leo were as rude as ever. After Chris's introduction Aubrey just wanted the whole thing to be over.
Finally, Leo stepped away and the introductions came to an end.
"Alright, you two go get some gear. And make it snappy."
Aubrey didn't hesitate to get out of there. She wrapped her hand around Levi's wrist and dragged him away toward the shed that held all extra gear. It was on the edge of the field but they were already fairly close. It would take them less than a minute to get there.
They walked in silence as Aubrey thought about the fact that Saru hadn't even mentioned her disobedience. She suspected Erwin had something to do with that. He always thought way ahead of her.
When they arrived at the shed, Aubrey went into the shed and managed to find two sets of extra gear. They were both ready in just a matter of minutes.
"Levi." Aubrey spoke up. She just had one last thing to say to him before they went back. "Don't rip anyone's head off today, okay? Especially Chris. I like her."
Levi scoffed.
"Wasn't planning on it."
Aubrey smiled at him. She was glad she could lighten the mood a little before they returned to the group. Things had gotten a little gloomy after Saru's forced introductions.
She stepped toward him, placing a kiss on his jaw before grabbing his wrist again and heading back.
Training was tough. Aubrey had a hard time being away from Levi even during the drills. They'd been together constantly for the last two days and his absence was jarring. Whenever she could, she stood close to him, allowing their hands to brush and their shoulders to touch.
At one point, Leo and Jacob had started teasing her about her kiss on the field but she just knocked them over the head. They were lucky that's all they got. If Levi had been there, she was pretty sure he would have torn someone's head off.
Lunch was a nice break but it was short and just holding Levi's hand didn't seem like enough.
When the afternoon finally rolled around, Aubrey finally started to feel hopeful. She knew that the second the dinner bell rang, they would head to their rooms and pack their things. They were going to move.
Aubrey was excited but… also scared. Moving would mean going through all of the things she'd left untouched for so long. There was no doubt in her mind that she would cry. The thought of disturbing Tika's things after so long was almost too much to handle. But… she would have Levi. If he was there… she could do it.
Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Aubrey could see the sun lowering in the sky and she knew it was only a matter of minutes before they were set free. She looked for Levi on the branch next to her only to find that she already had his attention. A knowing look was exchanged and Aubrey knew that they'd be leaving the second the dinner bell rang.
The seconds ticked by and eventually, after Aubrey had sworn several times that the damn bell must be broken, the chime rang through the air.
She flew out of the forest and landed as quickly as possible. Before she could even turn around she heard the thump of someone landing beside her. She turned to see Levi on her right and her hand instantly found his.
For a moment, all she could do was stare at him. They'd been waiting all day and now the time had finally come.
Aubrey found her voice.
"Ready?"
Levi nodded.
"Okay… my room first."
Levi squeezed her hand a bit tighter. He knew how hard this was going to be… for both of them.
Aubrey couldn't resist moving closer to him and pressing her forehead to his chest. She was already struggling and she needed him.
If Levi minded, he didn't say anything. He just held her hand tighter.
Finally, Aubrey felt strong enough to pull away. She knew it would be difficult and she wasn't sure she would ever be totally prepared, but… she was ready.
Aubrey took one last deep breath and met Levi's stare. His eyes were burning.
"Let's go."
A/N: Okay, so, not gonna lie. I don't really like this chapter. I feel like it's choppy and the words just don't flow right. BUT, it's the best I could do. Maybe I'm just imagining things because the last chapters have been really emotional and soft while this one needed to be a little more straight forward. Idk.
Anyway, next chapter will be back to emotional because it's the moving chapter lol.
Also, I'm sad to say that my updates will probably be a bit slower starting Monday. I'm starting school and… ugh. Seriously, pray for me.
Your comments are great by the way! I still lowkey cry every time I read them. Y'all are literally the nicest people on the planet. But I'm STILL a comment PIG so keep leaving them, pleaseeeeee. They make me happyyyyyyyy. Thank youuuuuuuu :)))
