A/N: I fixed chapter 44, I had forgotten to save the document before uploading and autosave only had about half of it. I didn't notice until later last night. I hope I didn't do that at any other point. Darn ONE DRIVE making me forget to save my files...


Early morning sunlight peered through the window and reached out to touch Thor where he still sat beside the open wardrobe.

"It's morning, Brother," he said, quietly. "Are you feeling any more together?"

Loki had his arms folded across his drawn-up knees. He raised his head from them. He still looked pale and absolutely exhausted, but he was no longer sweaty and he seemed composed.

"I'm fine, Brother. Your concern and support has been humiliating, but… welcome."

"We're brothers. We've got each other's backs," Thor said. "Or at least that's how it should be."

"I'm sorry that it hasn't been that way of late," Loki said.

"I more than played my part," Thor said. "I've been thinking about it – you had started to think there was something… frost gianty… going on with you by the time we got back from Jotunheim. After what I said to father about making the frost giants fear me, you must have been afraid that I would turn on you if I found out."

"It… didn't make me feel like you'd be forgiving me for getting you exiled, that much is true."

Thor gave him a sidearm hug. "You're my brother. I don't care where you come from or who your real father was. We've shared almost our whole lives together – your whole life. We've shared adventures. What we have is more than blood, it's family. And yes, you did stab me in the back at the coronation, but I guess I understand why you did it. If I had taken the throne at that point it would have been disastrous for Asgard. I admit that now. Getting exiled was a real eye-opener. On that count I… guess I owe you."

Loki snorted. "Strange thing to owe someone for, and I think I've caused enough shit to more than make up for any benefit."

"True. We'll call it even, then. Getting exiled was a growth experience for me, but I've seen signs of growth in you, too. Where did the change come in? Judah? Or just getting your ass handed to you by the Avengers?"

Loki nodded slowly. "I've had to do a lot of changing for Judah, or try to at any rate, but… I wanted to change because… of what I saw."

"You mean the future timeline? Ragnarok and all that? How did you see that anyway?"

Loki shook his head. "I cannot answer your question, Brother."

"Cannot or will not?"

"Either or. Both."

"Fine, keep your secrets. You're just like mother. It's a wonder you're not her real son. Honestly, you have all her powers. How do you think that happened, anyway? Do you think she gave them to you?"

Loki shrugged. "When I found out I was a frost giant I thought it might be so, but now I wonder. Odin claimed I was born with powers. Why then would she give me more? I have it from… a reliable source… that the frost giants took Vanir goddesses captive. Of course if he gave them to his Generals Laufey would certainly keep a few for himself. My mother almost certainly must have been one of them."

"That might explain why you look more Vanir than Aesir – in your god form," Thor added quickly.

"'In my god form,'" Loki mocked. "Like you've seen me in my frost giant form. I've got news for you – I still look remarkably Vanir. I have hair and everything."

"But you're, like, blue, right?" Thor said.

"Yes. I am, like, blue."

"You… gonna come out of the closet now? Judah might be getting up soon. He's going to wonder what the Helheim we're up to."

Loki began to unfold. "Yeah."

Thor got up and helped Loki out of the wardrobe. He dusted his brother off – a little more roughly than he needed to, but that was Thor. "Clean yourself up, Brother; you look like a hard night spent at the bottom of a bottle and you didn't take a sip. I'll see you at breakfast. I will see you at breakfast, right?"

Loki nodded. "You will."

"Good. I guess this night puts my heartbreak into perspective."

"Pain is pain, Brother," Loki said quietly. "It doesn't matter how it derives, or even how much there is. If you need me, I'm here for you."

"Thank you, Brother. But I should not burden you with my petty troubles. You have to bear up under enough."

"We're brothers. Your troubles are my troubles."

"By that logic, your secrets would be my secrets, but we know that's not true."

"I'd tell you if I could, Brother, but too much would be affected."

"Are you going to be all right today? How does your back feel?" Thor asked.

"It's fine. Better, anyway. I'll be all right."

"I can't believe Eir did not prescribe some kind of pain reliever."

"She might have, if I had stayed in the Infirmary long enough. I… left in rather a hurry."

"Brother!"

Loki flinched. Thor winced. "I'm sorry I shouted, Brother, but you really are too much sometimes. Go back, tell Eir you're an idiot, and get her to give you something for the pain. Don't be proud."

"Eir wasn't the one who had the caring of me. That's why I left."

"Who then did?" Thor said, puzzled.

"Lady Sigyn, one of my fiancées. She applied some balm, and we got into a bit of a spat."

Thor sighed. "That's you, Loki – making friends and influencing people, everywhere you go."

"If she didn't continually try to analyze my mind and motivations, I would have gotten angry."

"Maybe your mind and motivations require a bit of analysis," Thor said. "They've always been rather inscrutable to me."

"Would you like to be constantly under scrutiny?"

"No, I wouldn't. But Brother, she's a Healer, it comes rather naturally to her to act that way. And you, whether you like to admit it or not, are someone in a lot of pain. Of course she wants to help you."

Loki made a head motion that suggested he saw Thor's point, but his facial expression still said he didn't like it one bit. "I get it, but I don't want to be married to it," he said.

"Well I can't blame you for that. Still, she could be good for you, assuming she toned it down a little."

"She'd have to tone it down a lot, and she as much as said she had no intention of doing so."

"Well, hit the showers, cool off, clean up – you'll feel better when you look more yourself. I know you can't say 'put it behind you' to someone with PTSD, but… try to put what went wrong between you and the lady behind you, eh? Even if you don't choose her. It wouldn't hurt to be nice to her in the meanwhile."

"I will. Be nice to her, at least."

Thor looked at him critically, at though he doubted Loki's sincerity, or at least his definition of the term "nice," but he let it go. He clapped his brother on the shoulder and headed for the door. "I will see you at the breakfast table," he said again. "I hope you have a good appetite. I, personally, am ravenous."

"You're always ravenous," Loki called after him. He stood where he was for a moment as though uncertain of what to do next, then headed for the bathroom to shower and change.