There was a game happening.
A well and true and proper game of poker. All of Akatsuki was involved and so far Kakuzu was winning by a landslide.
They'd placed two tables together in the main room of the tower that had inadvertently turned into the meeting room. The real meeting room hadn't been used in years since everyone just talked about everything over food.
So here they all were, slowly but surely going broke as Kakuzu slowly and surely robbed them of everything they had.
"Yes hm! I got two aces! Beat that you dumb bastards hm!" Deidara laughed as he slammed his aces on the table. There were multiple groans around the table, before Kakuzu smirked and tossed his cards on top of Deidara's.
"Straight flush."
"Fucking hell!" Deidara cried as he watched all of his money vanish. He had gone all in that round thinking he could finally take back all his losses.
"You've lost, pack your stuff and go." Sasori snorted as he gathered the card for the next round.
"Tobi thinks Deidara should still play." Obito defended as he counted his chips. He was one of the only people in the table that could actually win.
He was cheating of course. What use were ninja skills if not to use them as much as possible?
"Alright, an article of clothing per round then." Kisame agreed immediately.
Sasori nodded and began dealing the cards as Deidara sat slowly on his chair with a stunned expression. "This is unfair hm, I just wanna win hm."
"The last chances count for everyone, and no one leaves until I've gotten every article of clothing off your backs." Kakuzu stated as he lifted his cards and looked at them blankly.
"Cheap fuck."
"Fold." Itachi grumbled as he tossed his cards down after the first flop.
A few more rounds came and went, as alcohol was passed around to those who could drink. Which was everyone except for Sasori.
Obito put his mask aside and took a large gulp out of the bottle before passing it on. He then grinned widely and upped the bets.
When it was Deidara's turn he just frowned. "What am I supposed to do? I don't have any chips I can't just call hm?"
"It's fine." Sasori said as he minutely lifted his puppet shoulder. He was clearly attempting to shrug but it didn't really look natural.
"Fold." Hidan tossed his cards.
"Call."
"How's it fine hm? If I win do I get to keep all the chips in the middle even if I didn't call hm?" Deidara frowned.
"You only have to lose a piece of clothing if you lose a round. If you win a round you get the base pot. The chips in the raised pots go to the second place winner." Konan informed him. "Call."
"We just did two rounds you lost without any raises in the pots, however a shinobi should always pay attention to his surroundings." Kisame grinned. "All in."
There were bunch of fish in the pond outside waiting to be thrown at Kisame but no one sent a clone to retrieve them.
The word fold was echoed all around, with Obito, Deidara, and Kakuzu still standing strong.
Cards went down at the final card flip and Kisame whooped with glee as he tossed his cards down. "Finally, you cheating bastards."
"Ahem, Tobi got a royal flush." Obito snickered as he flipped his cards down.
"Odd, I got the same." Kakuzu hummed.
"I got a pair of twos hm."
"There can't be two royal flushes! You two have the exact same cards!" Kisame barked. "Which one of you brought an extra deck?"
"Tobi is a good boy." Obito lied smugly as he sent a glare over to Kakuzu before quickly shuffling the chips into his pile and sorting them. "A very good boy."
"Yes." Itachi agreed before he quickly leaned over and kissed Obito's cheek. Obito blushed and looked away as he carefully piled his chips neatly.
"Dammit hm!" Deidara grumbled as he took off his right shoe and whipped it at Obito. Obito snickered and hid the shoe in his cloak.
It was when everyone was well and truly drunk, with most of them half naked did Kakuzu decide he was happy with his winnings. He'd collected the money off of everyone, and gotten Obito down to his black shinobi pants.
Konan reached over to Kakuzu and slurred something into his ear and the both of them staggered off together.
It was at this time, that Minato and Orochimaru used the hiraishin to break out of Kamui to appear on top of the table, making chips go flying as they pulled back their energy.
No one noticed.
I looked around at the drunkards surrounding me and felt a spark of fondness fill me. Somehow, I don't know how, but everyone had become close to one another.
In my universe the Akatsuki had joined our village and split ways. Even those that had been partnered with each other had split ways, minus Yahiko and Nagato.
Those two had been inseparable.
I looked around as everyone seemed to chatter amongst each other happily about nothing, or argue and banter without threats. The thing that made me blink was the sight of Obito sitting in Deidara's lap, with Itachi's tongue down his throat. The three of them mostly naked.
I looked over at Minato blankly, and he returned the look with a raised eyebrow.
"Perhaps we should come back tomorrow? We could go retrieve our clones." Minato suggested with a shrug.
I glanced at the three, who were obviously letting the alcohol control their actions before nodding silently.
Minato smiled warmly towards me and took my hand in his before he focused on his seals in our house in Konoha.
A moment later we were standing in the living room of the house and faced with something we hadn't expected.
It wasn't something indecent this time. Perhaps all the yaoi books I'd written over the years had affected my mind a little more than I realized.
No, we came to the sight of a literal puppy pile underneath the kotatsu. An eight year old mini-me, a sixteen year old Naruto and Sasuke, along with the thirteen year old wolfy Kakashi.
"That's sweet. I wonder when they begun to get along so well like this." Minato hummed as he touched his cheek and looked upon the pile with a motherly smile.
"We can find out quite easily." I hummed as I led the way to the room where I could feel our clones sleeping away.
Minato followed along as we went into the room and stood over each of our clones. I touched the seal on the back of my clones neck and absorbed its memories with a touch of spiritual energy.
The clone poofed out of existence with a cloud of chakra.
I blinked as the memories quickly filled my mind. Three years flashed and suddenly everything just made sense.
Sasuke asking to become Orochimaru's apprentice, Sakura asking out Lee, Sai becoming more human and becoming best friends with Kabuto, my novels my clone wrote and got published.
Naruto and Kakashi starting to date, and the advice I'd given to older Kakashi about his conflicts with his counterpart, and then Jiraiya teaching Naruto Sage mode. Sasuke losing his motivation to become stronger and me giving him advice on his brother. How Danzo momentarily went missing only for him to return to his cell the next week. How my counterpart healed Itachi and seeing exactly how everyone in Akatsuki became so close.
Then the scandal of Lee cheating on Sakura in public with Shikamaru only for the two of them to start dating and begin a whole slew of public sex escapades. How me and older Kakashi had to give Gai advice and help him feel better about his wayward student.
And all the missions Naruto had gone on and how he practically saved the worth with his team ten times over with words and fists.
There was quite a bit.
"Oh, we're friends with Kakashi." Minato hummed. "Guess he can keep his current body. Apparently he started dating someone."
"Oh? I didn't know that." I blinked as I sorted the memories neatly before looking at the bed forlornly.
Sleep would no longer be possible. We didn't actually need sleep anymore since our bodies no longer worked the same way. A pity. I truly did enjoy sleeping.
"It's a good thing. I'd be conflicted for a while adding my student from another dimension into our relationship." Minato smiled sheepishly.
"It never would have happened anyway. I only need you." I huffed sourly. "Polygamy may be natural here but I grew up with marriage being a sacred right between two people only."
"Yeah, yeah." Minato smiled. "I love you too."
That night the both of us worked over the table to create a seal to keep our forms physical. With all of our experience, we managed to create one quite easily.
It did restrict us a lot, making our spiritual energy a bit harder to use. But it was worth it to know we wouldn't accidentally destroy the world with a sneeze.
Not that we could sneeze, but it was just an example to show how hard it was to keep the physical form on our own. So with our sealed forms, we relaxed for a few days with everyone.
A few days of simply chatting, and occasionally giving advice here and there to people. We spoke to Kakashi to see if he wanted to come back to the other dimension with us and he decided he wanted to stay with Naruto here.
Then we were off to go and obtain the ten tails. Minato and I had decided against taking Kurama from Naruto since the two of them had unsurprisingly started to get along. So we needed to steal Minato and the yin half of Kurama from the shinigami to complete our ten tails to get back home.
If only it were that straight forward.
"Something happened to my siblings."
Naruto blearily opened his eyes and groaned before rolling over. "And?" Naruto huffed out as he curled into the warmth of the smaller body beside him. Kakashi snuffed a little and snuggled his face into Naruto's shirt before relaxing again.
"My connection to them has vanished."
Naruto hummed a little as he placed a small kiss to the tip of Kakashi's nose before sinking into his mind scape to talk to Kurama.
When he opened his eyes he found himself in the usual sewer scenery, with the impossibly large gates in front of him with a seal halfway pulled off from all the times they'd willingly worked together.
Kurama was pacing around his cell, his tails swishing all around nervously.
"I can usually feel them, but last night my connection between all of my siblings vanished one by one. I managed to talk to Shukaku for a moment before he was taken. A group called the Akatsuki had abducted all the jinchuuriki. Your friend, that Severus was there." Kurama spat.
Naruto stilled as he quickly worked through the information. "Severus-nee-chan...?"
"I didn't stutter, Kit. That brat is planning something. Him and your dad." Kurama growled. "My siblings, I don't know what they want with them, but I can't imagine it's for anything good."
"You don't think-you don't think he might be trying to revive the ten tails do you?" Naruto worried as he stepped into the cell to run his fingers into the fur of Kurama's coat.
Kurama growled darkly as he obediently settled down to let Naruto pet him. "Nothing good can come of bringing us together to create that monster again."
"We need to stop him." Naruto decided firmly. "Severus-nee-chan has to see reason. They can't take you or your siblings like this as they like!"
"And what can we do against him? Shukaku said that Severus felt like a god, even stronger than Tou-san." Kurama hissed out.
"I'll talk to him." Naruto promised. "He'll listen to me. I'll find out why he's taking your siblings and get him to set them free."
"I can only hope it works. I don't think there's anything else we can do." Kurama sighed darkly as he set his head down on the floor.
Of course there was always time travel, but Kurama knew better than to open that can of worms his Tou-san had left him for desperate measures.
Rin slowly opened her eyes.
She stared at the high ceiling above her, dark and moist. Metal and cement. She stared tiredly as memories of the world she had just been in slowly vanished.
Soon the only thing she could remember was having Kakashi-kuns fist in her chest.
Her suicide.
She blinked with confusion and quickly sat up, noting silently that her body felt incredibly different. Smaller. Stronger?
"Rin." A man breathed, and suddenly she was wrapped up in arms far bigger than her. She was lifted unceremoniously into large warm arms and held, her face hidden in a black cloak with red clouds.
It sparked little memories that slowly drifted away before she blinked up at the orange mask. "Who are you?" She managed through an unused throat.
The man quickly tossed his mask and she stared with incomprehension. "Obito?" She blinked. What? Why was he so old looking? He looked as old as Minato-sensei.
Wait a damn second, he was alive?!
"Obito!" She cried out as her little arms wrapped around his neck. Obito stiffened slightly before he gingerly held her tighter in his arms.
As he held her she soon came to realize how strange her predicament was. She was supposed to be dead.
Not wherever she was, being held by an Obito who was obviously four feet taller than her. Not to mention her voice came out squeaky and childish.
"So this is the girl?" Someone hummed warmly.
"She's a shrimp hm? Can't marry a shrimp. Stuck with us then hm." Someone else said happily as they came to her other side.
Rin moved her head away to look at the two who had come and felt her face heat up with warmth. Bishounen.
Incredibly pretty boys. Oh my.
Her eyes widened when one of them, the one with black hair came to Obito's right and kissed him closely to his lips. She didn't miss the way Obito blushed under the attention before he looked at her and smiled happily.
"It's like we had a baby! Tobi is so happy!"
Rin squawked.
"Rin-chan will take a while to grow into her new body." A familiar voice said happily. "But a promise is a promise. I'm only glad she didn't reincarnate in the time she'd been gone."
Rin turned suddenly in Obito's arms and widened her eyes at the breath taking sight of her sensei. He looked incredibly beautiful, with his flowing white haori over a white t-shirt and blue pants. He met her eyes and her breath caught at how majestic his face was.
A god. Her mind quickly supplied her.
There was no mistaking the familiar power radiating off of him in waves, or the way his clothes seemed to flow around him in light undetectable winds. Her mind flashed with the memories of gods she'd once been in the presence of before the memories were abruptly stolen from her.
Though the feeling had not gone.
"Minato-sensei?" She breathed with disbelief.
"Not quite." He smiled kindly at her. "I'm from another dimension, actually."
"Well now that that's done. We can get to reviving this dimensions Minato." Someone else interrupted. Rin looked in that direction and her mind short circuited as her jaw dropped.
The man she was looking at was indescribable. Bright, powerful, godly, beautiful. There were too many words and not enough to describe the black haired man who obviously shouldn't be allowed to exist.
Her survival instincts quickly worked against her now as she stiffened in Obito's arms and shut her mouth with a click. Something in her told her this man was dangerous. Beyond dangerous.
Something that shouldn't be possible in this realm.
Minato turned to him, and the man softened under his gaze. Easing the pressure that had caused her heart to momentarily stop in her chest.
She could feel her soul ease and overfill from the energy surrounding the two. She wasn't sure what was happening, she couldn't remember anything from before but she had this inkling of what she should do. So she slowly closed her eyes and fell into mediation.
No one noticed how she began to slowly, slowly take in the excess energy around her into her soul.
Stealing a soul straight from the shinigami's stomach was supposed to be a great feat. Facing death himself as you cut his stomach open and pull out the specific soul needed.
It was supposed to be a fear inducing task. Though I supposed it was.
I looked into the eyes of the shinigami and I could feel the creatures fear. I saw his eyes widening in horror as I formed a diamond sword made of pure spiritual energy.
The shinigami tried to take a step back, to escape the power of the seal holding him in place.
It was futile.
Not with the seals Minato and I created with our spiritual power alone. Shinigami moved his lips frantically, the movements were pointless since he clearly did not speak human tongue. Sound could not be heard from him either. Blocked by the fact that the shinigami didn't have a physical form to speak with.
The pressure he pressed on everyone around us had no effect on me, and only put my own power into perspective.
I was stronger.
I brandished the sword and sunk it into his flesh slowly, with a wicked smile on my lips. The feeling of satisfaction filling me as the creature struggled against his restraints with pure fear.
His stomach was opened, and the spiritual energy the thing had so far accumulated began to spill like a waterfall out of his gut. I found the soul I needed and tugged it out, the yin half of the kyuubi coming along with it.
I handed the soul to Minato and he took it gently and proceeded to place the fragile thing into the small body awaiting it. I took that time to bring a glowing hand to the shinigami's gut to heal it.
I felt how powerful I was, and it satisfied me completely. The shinigami could do nothing to me. He was completely under my thumb. Weak.
I wanted to kill it, simply because I could. However, I did not know what consequences there would be for this world if their shinigami vanished from it. What chaos would occur with the loss of the very creature that held the helm of the spirit world here. I was not completely unreasonable.
So I healed the creature and unlocked the seals holding him here. He nodded once to me before he slowly backed up into the gate behind him and escaped with his tail between his legs.
The door vanished and everything went back to normal.
"Well that was anticlimactic wasn't it?" I hummed as I turned to Minato. Minato shrugged as he continued to put the soul into the body carefully without harming it.
He even went so far as to strengthen it with spiritual healing chakra so it wouldn't get crushed in his fingers. The soul dared not to struggle.
"At least there won't be any fights when we get back home." Minato said with a happy smile. "I'm sure the shinigami's counterpart back home isn't any more powerful than this one."
I laughed a little at that. "Aha, you sure do like to jinx. Though I do have to agree."
Minutes passed as a seal slowly began to form over the small body's stomach.
"I'm almost done." Minato said as he kept his palms on the boys chest.
It was a little odd seeing a small Minato once again. Brought back memories of when I'd first met the boy when he was four and I was only 19.
The reluctant fondness I'd experienced with the boy as I'd passed on everything I had to the willing child. The puppy eyes and the fawning I'd suffered over the years, and the way my own protective instincts had awakened for the boy.
How it had changed somewhere along the lines towards something more.
I wondered briefly if I'd ever thought of the boy as anything more than what he was before I was revived. Just to be certain that I wasn't the type to raise my own mate from the cradle.
I found that I truly had no inclination. If anything, I'd been completely unwilling, but possessive when Jiraiya had wanted to snatch the boy from me.
I imagine if Jiraiya had not been there, I probably would not have accepted the child as an apprentice. I would have answered the boys questions and let him go back to the academy to do as he pleased, as I went on my way to do what I pleased.
It somewhat disgusted me to think that perhaps Jiraiya had unwittingly taken part in saving my life.
Icky.
Without him I would have never taught someone else the methods of true reanimation. I wouldn't have left my home open for anyone to get to the research needed to revive people.
What would I have done if I hadn't had someone I could trust to revive me if I'd ever died?
I found that I'd rather die than thank Jiraiya for inadvertently being the reason Minato became my saviour.
Minato took a step back from the boy and came to me to brush my braided hair away from my face. "Your thinking too hard, Oro-chan."
I hummed, pleased at the attention as I leaned into the touch and closed my eyes. "I'm lucky to have met you, Minato."
Minato's beautiful eyes shone with affection as he leaned in and pressed ethereal lips to my jaw. "You are." He agreed smugly.
A smile broke on my face against my will and I chuckled lightly before moving to press my face against his neck. "Though you can be insufferable sometimes." I murmured as I thought back to all the times we'd argued over what we'd eat for dinner, or who's turn it had been to clean the dishes.
"Well maybe if you got off your lazy ass to help with the garden sometimes." Minato huffed lightly as he pressed his lips to my cheek.
I purred as his gentle hands came to my waist. I leaned in closer and opened my eyes slowly only to pause when I saw two tiny blue peepers peering at us skeptically.
"Mina, your counterpart is awake," I smiled, unable to stop myself from looking upon the young boy with fondness.
Minato nodded and dropped one last kiss to my cheek before turning abruptly to smile at his counterpart.
"Hi, tiny me!"
