Deep Tunnels
A vampiric ilithid was a strange creature. Feral, barely intelligent compared to a live mind flayer, craving both blood and brains, but lead more by instinct than any conscious thought. There was little strategy in it's attacks, usually just a release of wild surge of psionics and then forward charge. The drow usually dealt with monsters such as those by using slaves to distract it and then pelting the undead with bolts. The creatures never hived in pairs or groups like the living specimen and seemed genuinely hated by them. Daria wondered how Sendai managed to get one into her enclave. Was it an ally? A prisoner? A pet? In her visions the monster roamed freely and seemed able to communicate telepathically, but the diviner couldn't spy on those conversations. If those even were conversations. Perhaps the drow was simply giving out orders, or using a form of domination? No, that couldn't be it. Both an undead and a member of the ilithid, the monster was completely resistant to any forms of mental attacks and most magic. All but the divine one, perhaps? Undeath could be a weakness also. Perhaps Anomen could turn or destroy it? Backed with a summoned animated sword, a golem or a pack of skeletons?
'Doable' she made a mental note and moved deeper. Sendai bled her own army dry of lieutenants already, sending the best of them as assassins after Daria, and now, having assumed her enemy was dead, loosened her defenses. The last room was her inner sanctum and a ritual chamber. If Daria's party moved fast enough, she could use the severely thinned out chain of command and general chaos to reach this place before the drow Bhaalspawn had a chance to devise anything truly nasty.
'That would be enough, for now' the diviner decided to end her tour. She needed to write it all down and make a sketch of the tunnels. Xan could probably draw it better, but failing aesthetics, at least her maps were easy to read. Now if she only could find the right moment to go back to...
Ah, yes… the earth elemental prince. Quite a summoning achievement and an impressive addition to bolster the thinned ranks of the drow. But Daria already had a good look at him before. Her 'present' was earlier. She kept looking.
The dark woods, seemingly empty, but underneath the decaying leaves and impenetrable roots of slowly rotting oaks, traps awaited in hundreds. This forest wouldn't be safe for decades, even after Sendai was gone. Trekking through all that nastiness would require both Imoen's and Minsc's full attention, otherwise limbs would be left on the way. But that too, Daria had already seen.
Frustrated she pulled back, diving deep into the past. No, wait… she wasn't moving through space, but time… She tried to correct her path, focusing on where her body should be…
She ended up looking at herself, suddenly conscious of every pimple on her face. Especially now, seeing how beautiful the stranger they just freed was. A genuine full-blooded elf, right there – in the bottom of the Nashkel Mines!
That was way too back in time, but Daria let the moment last. Xan looked horrible, having spent months in the dark, separated from his Moonblade. His face was gaunt and robes tattered, barely providing any protection from the cold and damp environment of a cave. And yet when he took the hilt of his sword, bathing his face in pale blue light, he truly looked like a mystical being more than an injured mortal. She felt in love that very moment, seeing him, defeated so completely and standing up to fight, like there was nothing else he could do. A paragon of the People… to his very core. She was in awe, humbled and inspired at the same time, for the first time realizing how little she knew about her own race. She yearned to stand by his side. And that feeling lasted to this day.
She took a shaky breath and began shifting through the pages of her past, careful not to lose the path. Too often was she reading this book – her own history – out of order, picking the pages at random, skipping back and forth. And finally she lost the plot. One stray thought and…
She got lost again. It was a village… a flood? There was no one familiar there, just some strangers, villagers huddled in a house slowly sinking into a marsh, crushed by the downpour too fierce for the wooden planks of the walls to shield against it. There were other houses around it, but nothing from this scene made any sense to Daria. This wasn't her future, or her past, just… some unconnected piece of space and time.
No, no, no… Again, she tried to focus. When was the last time she talked to anyone from her group? When was the last time she even saw a vision of talking to anybody? They've killed Abazigal and survived Sendai's ambush. Right now, they were preparing an assault on Sendai's enclave. Jaheira was meant to replenish herbs, Imoen with Minsc and Sarevok were looting the dragon's treasure… They set a camp in the cave systems. There were hot springs? Yes, and Daria went to craft another plan of attack. Her party was supposed to wait for her to tell them where to go. She didn't tell them yet… did she? I mean, she remembered telling them a couple of times, but those were only visions…
Weren't they?
Xan had access to all her notes concerning what she saw already of the Enclave, chaotic and out of order as they were. He could potentially navigate through using only those…She must have written down the most important parts, but she always did it after the vision ended and by now those could last for hours…
Focus. Past was one and unchangeable. Futures were branching and ever-shifting. All the diviner needed to do to find her current place on the line, was to locate the point where the possibilities connected into a solid, constant thread. That was where Xan's heartbeat was. Next to her, as always. All she needed to do, was to stop panicking.
There was a black space in her mind, an empty space, where nothing would distract her. Made of Abazigal's essence, her fortress of focus. She entered it. And listened.
There was no answer. The darkness felt suddenly that much more empty.
Xan's heart wasn't beating, her ears couldn't pick it up. Anywhere. She should be able to hear it on the other side of Toril should she want, but it just wasn't there, nowhere near the time she wanted – had to – come back to.
No, no, no… She was panicking now, but that couldn't be right! He was fine, he survived the battle with Abazigal without a scratch and none of the assassins came even close to him! He wasn't injured, he wasn't poisoned, so where was he?! If she, if he, if they went into he Enclave without her, if something happened…!
The futures blurred and mixed into a smudged image she couldn't make heads or tails from. The dark place she entered to concentrate shattered as she jumped from one moment to another, frantically looking for something at least remotely familiar.
"Where are you, where are..." she reached out, truly lost.
Someone took her hand. A familiar, cool grip enveloped it, a pulse, a life, a spirit – all known to her, everything was alright. She followed it home, not even disappointed when she woke in her body, stiff and immobile in a world where a drop of water, falling from a ceiling, paused mid-way. Daria looked at the stalactites above her, light brown, almost orange. Only one cave system she ever explored had rocks in this particular hue. She was still in Abazigal's hideout. She was stuck again, but it wasn't bad. This was the right moment.
"Ah. It seems to have worked" Daria heard just over her head. She'd jump in surprise or at least yelp, were she able.
Xan leaned over her, only slightly surprised that the entire camp around him stopped moving. Daria tried to force her eyes at least to center on his face, but they remained firmly pointed at the ceiling, everything closer was but a blur.
"Are you there, melamin? But you can't answer me, can you?" Daria heard him very well, this couldn't be a hallucination. His heart was beating, her palm closed in his. If all else failed, this was the last thing she would be sure of.
The enchanter placed his other hand on her forehead and she felt a presence invading her mind, delicate footsteps of a guest, careful not to damage anything in the host's house.
'I'm here! I'm here, can you hear me?' she called.
'I can hear you' he answered. If she was able to cry out in relief, she would. 'Thank you, thank you...' For a moment she lost his voice, drowned it in a weave of emotions, panic receding, giving way to relief. Calming slowly, Daria felt Xan wait patiently for her to regain composure.
'I'm sorry, we do not have much time...' he hesitated what to say next. 'I experimented with time stop spells, lining a trigger to your ring, that would sense you emerging from a vision to cut out the self-enchantment… Truthfully, I didn't think it would work, I...' She felt formulas and runes, complex patterns going through his memory, all mixed with worry and sadness over the state she was in. He would have to leave her soon, she realized, the time-stop spell wouldn't last nearly long enough to cover the duration of time she would spent stuck.
Daria braced herself. It would be alright, now. He came for her, that was the most important part. She couldn't ask for more. He would hold her all throughout this time, so it wouldn't be as bad.
'I will not leave you here' Xan answered her thoughts. He leaned lower, his forehead now touching hers. 'If you allow me… Forgive me, but for now, this is the only thing I can do… You are going to fall asleep in a second, your senses should return to normal… Is that alright, Daria?'
His scent surrounded her, the scent of old books and ancient magic, of longing for a homeland she never saw… his face was the only thing she could see, just a splash of colors so close. She relaxed herself to his spell, lowering her defenses… And blinked.
The world was moving again. Xan sat back straight. Now that she could take a look at him, he didn't look that good, clearly exhausted and probably sick again.
"She's awake" he sighed. A blonde head popped into Daria's field of view immediately. The elf would sit, but she was still all stiff. Jaheira appeared next, then the broadly grinning Minsc and Boo.
"You've been attacked by a drow assassin and poisoned" the druidess explained. "You then went into a vision and helped us prepare the antidote, do you remember?"
"No… I mean, yes, but that was more than a week ago…?" Daria asked, confused.
"It's been three days. You went… you got… like in Suldanessellar. You got lost again." Xan exhaled slowly. That explained why he looked so forlorn. Daria tried to hold his hand, but her own didn't feel right.
"The poison did a lot of damage." Jaheira also seemed tired, but the very notion of exhaustion seemed to be afraid of the druidess, wary not to bother her too much. So, it'd be better to say, she wasn't at peak efficiency right now. "We healed most of it with Anomen, but your heart was too slow for too long. I feared… There was a risk the damage to your brain would be enough to make you unable to return from a vision. But those worries were unnecessary, fortunately."
"Oh. I can heal myself a bit, I'll just..." Daria reached out to the essence of her father. Using it became quite effortless as of late.
"NO!" The three – Jaheira, Xan and Imoen – screamed in unison.
"You are not allowed…! I mean..." Jaheira pursed her lips, looking at Xan expectantly.
"It seems the more of Bhaal's taint you absorb, the more powerful your divinations become" the enchanter began to explain. "You can heal better, physically, and your mind doesn't suffer through it – that's why you don't get the headaches that much anymore. But you can't control this sudden influx of power. It it happened gradually, as you gained skill, this wouldn't be a problem. But as it is..."
"You learned how to throw a fireball and were handed a comet" Imoen summed up.
"...yes. So it would be better if you refrained from using your taint, as much as you can, even for healing. Jaheira will cure you completely, she just needs a few more days. And in the meantime..."
"You need to go back to school" Imoen grinned like a cat who just ate a canary. "Go through the basics. Maybe study some contingencies, why you're at it?"
"I..." Daria got slightly embarrassed, seeing her friends looking at her expectantly. She didn't have the heart to tell them, that she already absorbed Abazigal's portion of the essence. They were right – that was what caused her to get lost – the mental empty space that she created with it was enhancing her powers, cutting her off from any external distractions. Including her anchor. That's why she couldn't hear Xan's heartbeat, like always – she unintentionally blocked it out.
Her sire's essence was pulsing in her blood, filling the damages left by the spider venom. It wouldn't be long until she was back to health. She should lie, to ease Jaheira's worries at least, say she would resist the lure of Bhaal's power. But they've asked her for the truth so many times already… And in the end, she could never fully hide it.
"I can't stop it anymore" she confessed. Her dead muscles were regenerating, her heart beating strong, pumping blood both cursed and divine, to every cell of her body. Every part of her was now marred by this choice – this was her destiny. There was only one straight path were it would lead, one final conflict. There was no pretending, no turning back. It was selfish to think that, but with all the dairies and links to her psyche, none of of her friends could follow where Daria wandered.
"It's all mine, all the essence that I took from my siblings. It doesn't care if I use it or don't – not to me, as a person. It's not a corrupting agent. Well… Not more than any power. There is only one fate for this essence – to be complete. In me, one of my siblings, or new Bhaal, reborn. If I don't absorb it, learn to use it... if I pretend that I'm just a normal elf – it won't change a thing. I will still have to fight. I will still have to take part in deciding it's fate."
Jaheira didn't take it as well as Daria hoped. Anger flashed in her eyes.
"If it doesn't matter, then why won't you leave it alone?!"
"I have to protect you, I..."
"How does getting poisoned protect us?! Good job, Daria, it…!"
"I am protecting you" the diviner interrupted. "And if I do my job well, you won't even know there was a danger."
"And how does not knowing help?!" the druidess was screaming now. Daria tried to keep her face stone, but it was getting harder and harder with her body so wretchedly worn, thoughts muddled. A sweet moment for a reverie was all she wanted. But Jaheira always picked her weakest moments to make a scene. "I tried to be reasonable. 'She's an adult' I said to myself! 'She knows what she's doing'. But I don't think you know what's going on at all, child! All you to is try decide everything by yourself, without even thinking of consulting someone…!"
"I do know what..."
"Don't. Interrupt. Me. Again. You set us like pieces on a chessboard and moved at your leisure. The spell that made Solaufein fall, my unstable storm barrier – those were all a part of your plan, weren't they?! And not a word of warning, not a – 'don't worry when that happens'! Is this all a game to you?!"
Tears filled Daria's eyes. She wanted to wiped them, but her hands were still still and she couldn't coordinate them properly to do anything.
"Maybe we should talk later? Daria needs to rest, it's been..." Xan intervened.
"No, she needs to answer me" Jaheira remained unmoved.
"I-I-I thought it was just a vision, I was thinking about a way to kill Sendai, I just watched, I let it happen as it would, without talking because I would have to change what I said anyway and it was..." Daria had to pause to take a deep shaky breath. She was all in tears now. "I not toying with you… I'm trying not to have to toy with you…" she got tangled in words again. "I'm sorry..." There was nothing else she was able to say.
Xan wiped her tears, moving between her and Jaheira.
"That's enough. You can talk again later."
"No… No. I think I heard enough. Sir Anomen – get on with the healing." Jaheira left.
Daria slept through the next day and the next night. And a day after that, whenever someone got to check up on her, she'd pretend to sleep some more. Gooseberry brought her some fruit and she scratched his pink belly in return. Her rat got quite chubby as of late. It was Solaufein's fault, Minsc was teaching him how to care for and feed little animals. The familiar was getting more than his fair share of snacks in this 'training'. She focused on a vision the two – a berserker with a hamster instructing, a drow with a rat emulating. Gooseberry ignored most of the lesson until food came into play.
"No self respecting animal will agree to work without payment!" explained Minsc. "It's only fair to feed the warriors in a battle for righteousness!"
Solaufein didn't limit himself to learning, thought. More than once Daria's keen hearing caught the sound of blades clashing, a subtle vibration of a dancing Moonblade and dominating Ebony Blade.
She wasn't shy with spying on the two, to see how on Toril that particular cultural exchange started.
"That parry was weak, you barely made it. I don't want to sound rude, but you need to work on your technique" Solaufein indeed sounded rude, approaching Xan. He didn't realize it, but he struck the same pose as when Veldrin introduced herself in Ust Natha, an intruder on his domain. Xan held no sympathy for him, one would have to be blind not to notice that. But this wasn't a drow city. There was no need for them to be rivals. And not really knowing how elves on the surface acted towards each other, Solaufein could only make a guess.
"I am not a warrior" Xan simply answered. He looked better, having caught up on sleep since Daria woke up, but still, one would not mistake his lean form for that of a front line fighter.
"That's no excuse not to know the basics. There isn't always time to use magic, don't waste such a weapon. Besides, there are ways to blend magic and swordmanship that could make a good addition to a skill set."
Xan got up. He looked the drow, the enemy of his race, in the eye. He saw another lost soul Daria helped, another person that defied what they were born and raised in. For some reason his beloved never even considered those matters when adopting another misfit into their band. A noble or peasant, a priest or a thief, a drow or a moon elf, it all seemed the same to her. But how could it be any different, when her own legacy hounded her every step?
"Teach me then."
"What?"
"You are right, that would be a valuable skill. Would you please teach me?"
Daria came back from a vision, in her hideout out of blankets. She wanted to go to them, to talk to them, like before, like normal person. Instead of being a creep, who stalks her friends to know what was happening around her. Her divinations should serve only to defeat her enemies, only for a good cause. But she was terrified of leaving this safe spot, of doing something without planning, of taking even a smallest risk. What if Jaheira hated her? What if by talking to her Daria would only make things worse? She could say the wrong thing or show too much arrogance or vanity, or…
Was she really starting to think she was above all this? Above her friends? How could she change the way she thought, then?
Xan would help. It was his specialty, after all – though perhaps a touch too literally. And if he couldn't help, it'd be better with him anyway. Daria rolled up a blanket to mask her absence in a nest and cast an invisibility. The spell wouldn't fool anyone by now, not for long, so the sun elf quickly moved to find her beloved resting in a corner of a cave after a recent training session. He did not like them, that much was obvious. But after so many battles, he knew to appreciate a learning opportunity when it came.
She looked at him – once more unseen, a stalker, a nasty spy. His hair was in mess and has been for a few days now. He didn't find time nor motivation to take care of himself. Moonblade was left on his bedroll, near his limp right hand. Solaufein held no blow and though both fighters used stone skin spell to avoid an accidental injury, the strength of each blow still carried through. By now Xan was probably cursing the very fact that he had muscles, for them to be hurting that much.
Even so, he cast a glance at the nest of blankets, where Daria was supposedly resting. A worried frown on his face never truly disappeared, so now it only deepened. Daria knew he wasn't happy and one way or the other, it was her fault. Her heart hurt, seeing him like that. Perhaps before he could do something for her, she should do something for him.
She shuffled her feet to warn him of her approach, and whispered 'It's me' before he had a chance to take her for another drow assassin.
"Come with me for a moment?" the sun elf asked quietly. Her beloved found her in the blurred space before him, in a tensing of the Weave. Such a hasty spell wouldn't fool him and besides, he'd been watching her illusions since the day she cast a first Blur. But he knew why she wanted to stay hidden and said nothing, gathering himself from the ground.
Daria took his hand – the left, sparing the right any more effort and lead the moon elf to one of the more hidden hot springs in the cave system. The air here was stuffy, steam filling the air. In a moment Daria's clothes clung to her skin, thick mage robes gaining extra weight with the absorbed moist. Seeing the place her vision showed, Daria picked up the pace, heading straight into the water, Xan noticing it and trying to stop her a second too late.
The water made a huge splash as Daria entered it, pulling her beloved along, ending the invisibility. It was hot, almost but not scalding, and smelled vaguely of iron and ozone.
"Melamin, what are you doing?" Xan didn't hide the reproach in his voice. The level of the water was only slightly above his waist – this little nook hid no underwater tunnel – but he got completely soaked from their vivid entrance.
"I have regrets" she answered, not really answering. Instead, she dipped her hands in the water and touched his face, his forehead, temple and cheeks. He didn't ask further, just looked at her, eyes dark. There was no hurry. Tonight nothing would happen. There would be no assassination attempts, no madmen trying to kidnap her, no rivals ready to fight, no wars… Daria wanted to remove all traces of exhaustion from her beloved elf's face, but for now, she only had this one night.
"I should have helped Solaufein adapt to the surface, I should have made sure Imoen was alright…" she began explaining, finding an old shallow cut on his chin and washing it too. "...having learned of her heritage and then it being taken away from her so suddenly… I should discover what Sarevok really wants and talk more with Jaheira… And be with you. I should be with you more often. So many regrets…"
She put her arms around his neck, finding and opening a clasp to an amulet he wore. A nasty bruise formed on the nape of his neck – the amulet was heavy and he never really took it off. She let the piece of enchanted jewelry fall into the water with a splash and put her wet fingers on the darkened skin, massaging it gently, as it that could wash it off. Xan's eyebrow raised at the careless way she disposed of a magic item that probably cost a year of honest work, but only sighed, feeling her hands now moving to free his fingers from the rings of protection, of magic, of power… of countless things he cared so little about.
"But I am not walking to my death" Daria continued, drowning the rings in hot water. "I have Immy, Jaheira, you… people I care for. And that's why I want to live after this war. I haven't found a way yet… but I will. I'm not doing these things, because I will have time later. After. One day, this will all be a memory, no more enemies… But for now..." Her hands wandered to the Belt of Piercing he wore and slid on it's clasp.
He answered her, palms danced on her clothes, reliving her of the brooches and rings, necklaces and magic stones, slipping off the gauntlets and leaving them for the water to claim. And then, suddenly, the last – Daria's heavy Ring of the Ram, fell with a loud splash.
"This… it's..." Xan didn't finish. His eyes were dark as the bottom of the ocean and focused only on Daria now. They stood close to each other, hands halted where they finished the search. Daria first let her fingers probe deeper, into the folds of the purple robes her beloved wore and he did the same, untangling the last threads that tied hers. Without all the belts and clasps keeping them in place, the clothes slid off easily, with only little help from tender palms. Their lips found each other and…
Ciriane woke up. So far she never missed a single dream of this past. But now she needed some tea. Well… A lot of tea, enough so she wouldn't sleep tonight. In this one, they needed some privacy.
