They managed to deliver all of their boxes in just a few trips. The walk to the castle and back was a bit long but Aubrey didn't mind. She was grateful for the movement. She needed the time to shift her mind off of herself and onto Levi. Her part was done. Now he would be forced to go through the same pain… Aubrey was determined to be there with him for every second.
She knew that Levi's experience might even be more difficult than hers. Instead of just one room to empty, Levi had two.
Aubrey hadn't seen Isabel's room since the day she'd done her orientation. She had no idea what was in store for them.
She looked to Levi. He was setting down the final box at the foot of their new bed. The sight was both thrilling and horrifying. Putting down the final box from her room meant that her journey was done, that her move was complete. But it also meant that Levi's was just beginning.
Aubrey crept closer to him and placed her hands on his back. She slid her fingers down and over his shoulder blades and then twisted him to face her.
Aubrey looked up at him, seeing that his features were all hard lines. She thought it looked like he'd turned to stone.
Her hand automatically went to his face and she began to smooth away the tension. Ever so slowly, she saw him start to relax until, eventually, he moved into her, leaning his head on her shoulder.
Aubrey ran her fingers through his hair. She'd wait as long as she needed to. Levi had done the same for her.
After a few minutes, Aubrey felt his breathing slow to a steady rate and it wasn't long until he pulled back. She met his gaze, waiting for him to speak.
"Let's go."
Aubrey nodded and ran her fingers through his hair one last time.
"Do you want to start with Isabel's room or yours?"
Levi shuddered but kept his voice strong.
"Isabel's."
Aubrey nodded again and took his hand in hers. She tugged lightly and Levi followed behind her as they left the room.
Aubrey dragged them to a supply closet before they headed for the barracks again. They'd need more boxes. She rummaged around on the shelves until she found what they needed. Levi took a few and Aubrey carried her share. Hopefully, they would have enough to pack away everything in both rooms.
Their walk to the dorms was silent. Aubrey kept a close watch on Levi's features the entire time. His brows were furrowed and there was a small frown on his lips but other than that she saw no signs of turmoil. She hoped it would stay that way.
It felt strange to go to the front door of the barracks rather than the back. Both of them had taken that path for so long that it was almost instinct. But neither of them would ever be entering through the back door again.
Aubrey approached first, pushing open the door and making sure everything was clear. They'd have to be careful in the halls. It wouldn't be a surprise if some girls had already returned from dinner.
Aubrey saw no one and she reached back for Levi's hand. He took it without question.
Aubrey led Levi through the halls and realized that he'd probably never even seen Isabel's room. She wasn't sure if that was better or worse.
They made a few turns but Aubrey knew that Isabel's room wasn't very far from the front door. They'd be there any second.
Finally, the door came into sight and Aubrey slowed their pace until they finally came to a stop. Levi looked at her, a silent question in his eyes. This is it?
She nodded and felt her throat tighten. This was going to be hard.
Levi turned back to the door and Aubrey saw him scanning every inch of the wood. Maybe he was trying to memorize something he'd only get to see once.
Aubrey waited, watching closely for any sign that he needed her. She didn't have to wait long.
Levi's gaze left the door and when twisted to face her, Aubrey could see the horror on his face.
She dropped her boxes and reached for him instantly. She knocked Levi's own boxes from his hands and her arms slid around his neck. Aubrey brought him close, placing light kisses all over his cheek. She could feel the tension in his muscles and felt a punch in her own gut. She knew exactly how he was feeling.
Her mind searched for a way to help him, to soothe him and she suddenly remembered what Levi had said to her. Perhaps those words would work for him as well.
"You can do it, Levi. I know it hurts, but you can do it."
Aubrey felt him shake in her arms. She could only think to repeat the same encouragement.
"You can do it."
She placed another kiss on his cheek.
"You can do it."
Levi pulled away from her. He was still trembling but his expression was slightly less horrified and slightly more determined. Aubrey saw him turn his attention to the doorknob.
His hand reached out and the second he touched the metal he halted. His eyes flew back to Aubrey and she ran her fingers through his hair for the thousandth time.
She found his gaze again and nodded.
Levi swallowed and after just a second's more hesitation he turned the knob and pushed the door open.
Aubrey watched as he scanned the room from the doorway. His eyes were wide and she almost expected him to call for her again.
But, to her surprise, Levi turned back around, gathering their fallen boxes. Aubrey was stunned and he had nearly all of them in his hands before she managed to help.
When she stood, Aubrey saw Levi waiting for her. She nodded at him one last time.
"You can do it."
Levi took a deep breath and with one quick movement he pivoted and walked into the room.
Aubrey followed him in, dropped the boxes, and shut the door. She practically ran to his side, not wanting to leave him alone for even a second.
Her eyes landed on his face and she could see that he was lost in thought. It wasn't that lost look that he sometimes took on but it was still intense.
She took the boxes from his hands and set them down but Levi hardly seemed to notice. His expression didn't change.
Aubrey brushed her fingers across his cheekbone but he still didn't respond.
"Levi." Aubrey exhaled in relief when he blinked and looked down at her. She pulled his forehead to hers. "What first?"
Aubrey felt him shudder but he still managed to speak.
"The closet."
Aubrey nodded and started to lean down for a box. She didn't get very far.
Levi grabbed her jaw and pressed her lips to his. He was desperate, overwhelmed. When he'd walked into the room, he'd barely been able to breathe. The space seemed to scream Isabel's name and he'd almost expected her to just appear before him. But… he knew she wouldn't. Not now and… not ever again.
He kissed Aubrey harder and felt her hands press into his chest. He still had her. That's what he would focus on. It was the only way he'd get through this.
Levi pulled away, pressing his forehead to hers.
"Stay close."
Aubrey responded by kissing him again. She'd stay by him every second.
As soon as they broke apart, Levi found her hand. He laced their fingers and then, after one last breath, raised his head and walked toward the closet.
Aubrey grabbed a box and followed eagerly.
As they walked, she realized she had yet to actually look at the room. She'd been too distracted by Levi's discomfort.
Her eyes scanned the surfaces.
The space was a bit messier than Levi and Furlan's room but still neat. The bed hadn't been made and there were a few bits of trash that hadn't made it into the can. Other than that, it looked exactly as she'd thought it would. It was eerily… lived in.
Aubrey came back to the present when Levi halted in front of her. They'd arrived at the closet.
She watched as Levi slowly inched open the door and revealed the items inside.
A quick look revealed that the closet was fairly empty. There was an extra pair of boots, a set of straps, and an entire set of military-issued winter clothing that looked like it had never been touched.
Aubrey nearly sighed. She was glad they'd started with the closet. It would probably be the easiest of the things they had to go through.
Aubrey set the box down on the ground and reached for the pair of boots. She held them up and turned to Levi.
"Keep or leave?"
Levi's eyes went cold and Aubrey almost reached for him again, but he spoke before she could move.
"Leave."
Aubrey set the boots to the side. She'd throw them out when they were finished.
She reached for the straps.
"Keep or leave?"
Levi's eyes went even darker and this time he didn't respond. Aubrey didn't hesitate. She moved into him, wrapping an arm around his waist and placing a hand on his cheek.
"Keep or leave?" Her voice was barely above a whisper.
Levi's eyes lightened the tiniest bit and Aubrey felt his hand go to her waist. He looked back at the straps.
"Leave."
Aubrey set them to the side. She studied him for a moment, planted another kiss on his cheek, and then moved on to the next item.
The process repeated over and over again until Levi had emptied the closet and eventually the dresser.
Aubrey was almost grateful that Isabel hadn't really had enough time to acquire many personal items. It would only have made things harder.
The desk was practically empty apart from a few unopened ration bars, some quills, and a notebook with a few scribblings and drawings in it. Only the notebook sparked any intense reaction from Levi. He'd started to tremble at the sight of the sketches but Aubrey held him through it and eventually he calmed enough to help her strip the bed.
And, just like that, they were done.
Aubrey made her way back to Levi's arms and kissed him gently. She was a bit surprised that his reactions hadn't been more extreme but she had a feeling he was trying to hold it in until he'd finished with everything. After all, they still had a whole other room to go.
She broke away and let her hands drag down Levi's neck until she reached his chest.
His expression was stony but Aubrey could see the fear growing in his eyes with every second. It was time to leave.
"Tell me when you're ready."
Levi nodded and took her in his arms, pressing his head into her neck. He wasn't ready. Not quite yet.
They stood there for what Aubrey knew was a long time. She rocked them back and forth, swaying on their feet. Levi held onto her with an almost crushing grip but she wouldn't have wanted it any other way. She needed to be close to him just as much as he needed to be close to her.
Finally, Aubrey felt Levi's arms start to loosen and she stilled their rocking. Levi moved back just enough to look her in the eyes.
"I'm ready."
Aubrey placed a final kiss on his lips and walked to the boxes in the middle of the room. She picked one up and carried it out and into the hallway, leaving the door open as she returned for another. Levi joined her and soon they were down to the last box.
Levi picked it up gently, holding it like it was made of glass. Aubrey moved behind him and pressed her lips to his neck as her fingers trailed down his spine. She remembered how hard this part was.
Aubrey stayed put, continuing to comfort him in any way she could. She didn't know if it was helping but a few minutes later Levi reached back and found her hand. She knew what he meant. He was ready.
Aubrey circled around to face him one last time and then she pulled him toward the door. Levi went with her willingly.
She turned to face him when she stepped into the hall and watched him take a deep breath as he passed through the doorway. He turned, his hand finding the knob and, after a last glance, he shut the door.
Aubrey saw a shudder go up his spine and she placed her hand on his back. Then, with no warning, Levi gathered the boxes in his hands. Aubrey didn't hesitate to do the same. It was obvious that Levi wanted to go. He wanted to finish this.
The two of them managed to carry everything in one trip. Isabel hadn't had much to begin with and Levi had decided to keep even less.
Aubrey led them back through the halls and out the front door. They got lucky again and didn't run into anyone returning from dinner. Aubrey figured there must be someone watching over them.
As soon as they were out of the barracks, Aubrey led them to the side of the building and set down her boxes. Levi did the same, though he wasn't exactly sure what they were doing.
Before he could even stand, Levi felt Aubrey's hand on his chin. She raised his eyes to hers and stared at him with a burning intensity.
"Do you want to take these back or… do you want to go right away?"
Levi paused. He didn't want to do the same thing all over again. But… waiting would only make things worse. He needed to get it over with. He needed it done.
Levi took a deep breath and felt his lungs shake. He hoped he'd be able to speak.
"Let's do it. Right now." His voice was barely audible.
But Aubrey had heard him.
She pulled him in for another kiss and then turned to the boxes. She didn't want to leave them out in the open while people were returning from the Mess Hall. She didn't think anyone would even bother to notice them but she just couldn't risk anything getting taken. Every single item was precious. They'd have to take the boxes with them.
Aubrey leaned down, picking up as many as she could. They still had had enough empty ones to get through Levi's room.
Levi helped and soon they were ready to go again.
Aubrey was a bit panicked by the idea that the boxes prevented her from holding his hand but she didn't really have a choice. As soon as they got there she'd make sure to never leave his side.
After one last look, Levi led them away and headed for the men's barracks.
It took almost no time at all to arrive and without even a glimmer of hesitation, Levi walked through the front door. He couldn't care less if they got caught. It just didn't seem to matter anymore.
Aubrey followed closely behind him. Her eyes scanned the area. It was clear. She didn't know if she'd ever had such good luck in her life.
Levi twisted through the halls until Aubrey recognized that they were getting close. Her own breaths started to come faster. She was nervous for what was to come.
Finally, a familiar door came into view and Levi came to a stop. Aubrey hurried to set her boxes down and heard them thump on the floor. Her hands found Levi's arms and she lifted his own boxes out of his grip. He didn't resist.
Aubrey moved in front of him, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him close.
"Levi…"
Aubrey could feel his breaths on her skin. They were harsh, fast, worried.
"I love you."
There was barely even a second before Levi's lips crashed into hers. It was exactly what he'd needed to hear.
He kissed her for a moment and then, with a surge of willpower, he reached for the door and pushed it open.
The shock wasn't as bad this time. He'd already seen this room and he was grateful that he'd decided to face it earlier that morning. Otherwise it might have been too much.
The sight of Furlan's things was still devastating but at least he'd known what to expect.
Levi heard Aubrey shut the door behind them and turned to see that she'd already gotten all of the boxes inside.
The instant his eyes met hers, she was with him, her hands smoothing over every tensed muscle in his body. Levi sighed and leaned into her, pressing his lips to her hair. He would need her.
But, as much as her touch soothed him, Levi didn't allow himself to linger. He needed to force himself to start. If he didn't, he knew he'd stay in Aubrey's arms forever.
Reluctantly, Levi backed away, keeping her hand in his as their only point of contact. He quickly grabbed an empty box and then headed for his dresser. He'd start with his own things. He wasn't quite ready to face Furlan's half yet.
Levi yanked open the top drawer and dug through its contents. Everything was already organized so it was easy to go quickly. He gathered the first stack of shirts in his hands and dropped it into the box. Aubrey joined him, and they had the entire dresser done in just a few minutes.
Aubrey closed up the boxes they'd finished and then raised her fingers to Levi's face, tracing his cheekbones.
"What next?"
Levi released a breath at her touch.
"The desk."
Aubrey nodded and they moved across the room.
Levi started to go through it and Aubrey stood behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist and kissing down his spine.
Levi shuddered but kept going. He didn't want to stop for fear that he wouldn't be able to start again.
His hands went through the drawers. He didn't have much, only some paper he'd never had a need for a couple of quills. In fact there was only one thing in the desk that he actually cared about.
Levi came to the bottom drawer and carefully slid it open to reveal what he was looking for.
Aubrey recognized it immediately. Wind in the Hills. It was his mother's book.
Levi picked it up gently and just held it for a moment. His thoughts went back to the day he'd grabbed it from his mother's bedside table as Kenny had taken him away. It was the only thing he'd been able to reach. It had been with him through everything. His time with Kenny, his life with Isabel and Furlan, and now his future with Aubrey. He remembered the day when she'd managed to steal it from him at the pond. Things had been so… new. Now, it was hard for him to imagine a time when he didn't have her, when he'd somehow convinced himself that staying away was the better option.
Aubrey's lips on his neck brought him back and Levi rose from his crouch on the floor. He twisted to face her and immediately drew her into his arms. His mouth found hers and he kissed her deeply. Just thinking about a time when he'd forced himself away was enough to make him need her close.
When they broke apart, Levi leaned back to look at her face. His eyes traveled over every feature, taking in every detail. He couldn't fathom how someone so perfect had managed to fall for him.
"Levi?"
His eyes continued to memorize every inch of her skin.
"Hm?"
"Can I ask you a question?"
He nodded, not pausing his task.
"What was your mother's name?"
That caught his attention. He met her stare and paused. For a second he was too caught off guard to speak but, eventually, he found his voice.
"Kuchel."
Aubrey smiled. Somehow the name was so… fitting.
She leaned in, placing a quick kiss on Levi's mouth.
"Thank you."
Levi dipped his head into her neck and ran his lips over her skin. She was the only person still alive that he'd ever told about his mother. Now, it was a piece of him that belonged only to her.
Eventually, he realized he'd been standing there too long, his mouth grazing her neck for a nonsensical amount of time.
He sighed and backed away. Aubrey still had a smile on her lips and the sight managed to lift his own spirits a bit, even as he returned to the task at hand.
Without saying a word, he pulled Aubrey to his bed and started stripping the sheets. When she recognized what he was doing, she moved to help him and the bed was done in seconds.
Levi looked around the space. Unlike Aubrey's room, he and Furlan had only had one closet to share. He thought about asking her why but decided it didn't matter anymore. After they were done here, he'd have a bigger closet than he'd ever had in his entire life.
But there was one last thing he had to do before he approached the closet at all.
"Stay here."
Levi released Aubrey's hand from his own and walked across the room.
Aubrey furrowed her brows at his request but she did as he said. She was sure she had a reason. She was right.
Aubrey watched as Levi kneeled in the corner of the room, his fingers pressing into the floor in a methodical manner. Her mind swirled. What was he doing?
Finally, Levi must have found what he was looking for because a look of familiarity took over his expression. His hand moved another inch and Aubrey watched as he tore a floorboard from its place.
Her eyes widened. Now she knew why he'd told her to stay. He was literally ripping up the floor.
Instinctively, she walked to him, completely forgetting about his order. She didn't care anymore. She needed to see what exactly he was doing.
Levi noticed her coming closer and he arched an eyebrow.
"I thought I told you to stay?"
Aubrey ignored him.
"Why are you tearing up the floorboards?"
Levi sighed. No point in stopping her now.
He reached down into the floor and pushed his hand around until he found what he was looking for.
Aubrey leaned in closer when she saw him pull out an envelope that was practically bursting open. Whatever was in it was obviously too big for its container.
"What is it?"
Levi set the envelope to the side and replaced the floorboard. Aubrey waited eagerly. Her curiosity was growing with every passing second.
Finally, Levi stood, bringing the envelope up with him.
Aubrey peeked at it again. Her interest was obvious.
Levi let out a long exhale and then, after one last pause, he tore the thing open.
Aubrey thought her eyes would pop out of her head.
Inside of the envelope was a stack of money larger than she'd ever seen. And they weren't small bills.
"Levi… where did you get this?" Aubrey couldn't stop staring at the mountain of cash.
"I told you we'd been saving up, remember?"
Aubrey forced her eyes to meet his as she remembered what he'd once told her. This must be the money they'd collected for their lives on the surface.
Aubrey scanned Levi's expression. It was dim but she didn't see any signs of his distant look returning. He was still in the moment.
She cupped his cheek with her hand and he leaned into it, thankful for the touch.
She didn't know what to say. The money was obviously a reminder of his past and now… it had no purpose. Levi didn't strike her as a big spender.
"It's ours now."
Aubrey felt her mouth pop open. All she could do was stare at him.
"I'll buy you a necklace or something."
Aubrey found her voice.
"Oh, no, Levi. I can't let you-"
"Stop."
Aubrey closed her mouth. There was that authoritative tone again. She had a sudden feeling he'd make a good captain one day.
Levi's sternness melted away from his features just as soon as it had come on. He wrapped a hand around the back of her neck and pulled her closer until their foreheads touched.
He took a deep breath.
"Please, Aubrey. It's what they would have wanted."
Aubrey nearly choked on her own air. How could she say no now?
After a few seconds, she gave in and nodded.
Levi sighed, glad that she hadn't dragged out their disagreement. He would have found a way to spend it on her even if she'd persisted. They had a new life to start and a little bit of money wouldn't hurt.
He kissed between her brows, then down the bridge of her nose, and then finally he landed on her lips.
Aubrey kissed him hard. She was overloaded by his ability to make her feel in ways she'd never felt before she met him. Her body was on fire and she couldn't think of anything except how much she loved him.
When she needed air, she pushed her face into his chest, her fingers grasping at the fabric of his shirt. She knew she'd never find someone that she wanted, needed, more than him.
Levi put his lips all over the crown of her head. But it wasn't long until his eyes caught on a closet that he'd yet to face. They still had a lot more to do before they were finished.
Levi ran his hand up and down Aubrey's back as he spoke.
"We have to finish this, Aubrey."
Aubrey shuddered, took a deep breath, and nodded. He was right. It was time to end it.
She moved away from him, only holding on to his hand.
"Where to?"
Levi's brows furrowed.
"The closet."
Aubrey squeezed his hand and after just one more pause, Levi pulled them to the closet door and threw it open.
He froze immediately but Aubrey had been ready. Her hands slid down his back and then she moved in front of him. She kissed him lightly and then took the nearest item of clothing off the rack.
"Keep or leave?" She was going to do the same thing they'd done in Isabel's room. She wasn't sure it was the best way to help him, but it worked.
Levi relaxed the tiniest bit and his mind woke up just enough to make a decision.
"Keep."
Aubrey folded the shirt and placed it in the box before picking up another and repeating the process all over again.
They made their way through the closet with as little difficulty as could be expected. Levi had gone blank at the sight of one particular shirt but Aubrey had gotten him back fairly quickly.
After they were done there, they'd moved to Furlan's dresser and emptied it in a similar fashion. Levi had handed her whatever he wanted to keep and the rest of it was set aside.
The bed was without its sheets less than a minute after they'd finished the dresser.
That just left the desk.
Aubrey tensed when they approached it. It was all they had left. When the desk was done… all of this would be over.
Levi halted and just stared for a moment. Aubrey didn't think he was suffering, just preparing himself. Nonetheless, she put her hands on him. She knew that the last part was the hardest. It was the time when you really had to let go.
They stood there for a few beats and then, suddenly, Levi grabbed her arm and pulled her in front of him. When Aubrey looked up at him, she could see the determination, but also the need in his eyes. He moved her arm around his back and Aubrey understood.
She hugged him tightly and Levi sighed. Now he could begin.
Slowly, his hand reached out and his fingers closed around the handle of the top drawer. He took a deep breath, felt Aubrey hold him a little tighter, and then pulled the drawer open.
It looked a lot like his own drawer had. It was neat and there wasn't really a lot to go through. When Levi began to shuffle through it, he found exactly what they'd found in every other desk. Paper, quills, ink, an unopened ration bar. It was all very… ordinary.
Levi was thankful for that. He was hoping he'd get through this desk without any surprises.
He moved on to the next drawer. It was more of the same.
Finally, he came to the last drawer and he felt a surge of fear in his gut. The last drawer always seemed to hold the secrets.
Just when he needed it, Levi felt Aubrey's lips on his neck and her hands smoothing over the muscles of his back. He turned his head and placed a kiss on her hairline. They were almost there.
With a renewed sense of strength, Levi tore open the final drawer.
At first, he was confused. It was another stack of clothes. Why was he keeping clothes in his desk?
But when Levi looked closer, he could tell that this clothing was different. It wasn't military issued… it was his clothing from the Underground.
Levi had thrown his out the minute they'd gotten to the Surface. Their capture had left him filthy and he hadn't even considered keeping them. He hadn't found any old clothes in Isabel's room so he assumed she'd done the same. But, apparently, Furlan had kept his.
Maybe it was because the clothing was the only thing they had left of their time together in the Underground. They'd been dragged away by Erwin without ever being able to gather any of their belongings. And, as much as Levi loathed the Underground City, it had been his home for most of his life and it was where he'd met both Isabel and Furlan. That city would always be a part of him.
Levi reached for the clothes and realized that his hands were shaking. Aubrey must have noticed, too, because she ran her fingers through his hair and kissed along his collarbone.
Levi took a breath as he finally gripped the fabric. His whole body was humming but he was too distracted to determine what emotions he was feeling. All he could do was stare at the clothing in his hands.
Aubrey held on to him. She didn't know what the clothes stood for but they obviously meant something. She'd give him as long as he needed.
She busied herself with putting her lips on whatever skin she could find.
What could have been seconds, minutes, or hours passed but Aubrey just kept going. She wasn't going to stop until he told her to.
But, eventually, she felt Levi begin to shake even harder and suddenly his breaths were erratic and harsh. She moved back immediately to look at his face.
He was crying.
Aubrey panicked but she wasn't necessarily surprised. In fact, beneath her layer of panic was a layer of relief. When he hadn't cried in Isabel's room she was worried that he would just hold everything in. But now he was going to let it out and she was going to stay with him through it all.
Aubrey put a hand on his chest and gently pushed him into the desk chair. She crawled into his lap as soon as he was seated and pressed her head into the crook of his neck. She continued kissing him, pausing every so often to wipe away his tears and then returning to placing her lips on his skin.
At first, Levi could only sit there, allowing her to comfort him. But after a few minutes, the pain set in even further and he ended up clutching her to his chest.
His silent tears turned to sobs and he pressed his face into her shoulder as she rocked him back and forth.
Every time he thought his pain was lessening, the past would come back into his mind and another round of sobs would begin. He'd lost them. He'd lost his family and there was nothing he could do to get it back. Now they were just pieces of his memory, pieces of his heart that would never be known by anyone else. He'd lost his family and he would never see them again.
Levi felt like he was being ripped in two. The pain was so intense that he almost couldn't take it.
But even when he thought he was about to shatter, about to fracture into pieces… he didn't. Aubrey held him tighter through every cry and her lips never left him. She pulled him back together, gathering the pieces and forcing them back into place.
She just kept comforting him, never letting him break. And, eventually, it worked.
Levi's pain began to numb just the tiniest bit with every brush of her mouth or graze of her hands and soon his cries quieted and only silence was left.
Levi was completely limp in her arms but Aubrey didn't mind. She was just happy that he'd gotten through it. Every sob had hit her like a punch to the gut and it had taken all of her strength to not start sobbing herself. It had been excruciating.
The two of them sat there, not caring how much time passed. It wasn't important.
Even after his sobs had ceased, Aubrey had never let her lips leave him. She was afraid to stop, afraid that letting go in any way would bring his pain back. But when his own mouth found her neck, Aubrey knew that he'd made it, that he was back. They were going to be alright.
Levi kissed all over her body, not even hesitating to go all the way down her arm and back up again. He practically worshiped her. He knew he'd never find someone more perfect.
Aubrey sighed at his touch and when his lips found hers, she leaned into him and dragged her fingers through his hair. She was so relieved by his return that she felt as if she could ride the wave of calm for the rest of her life.
Eventually, though, Aubrey had to break away and her eyes traveled to the stack of clothing that had fallen between them.
She still didn't know what the meaning was but she wasn't about to ask. She wasn't going to risk bringing back any of Levi's pain.
"They're Furlan's clothes from the Underground. It's... all I have left of that time."
Aubrey stared up at him, wide eyed. His voice was rough and hoarse but she was surprised he'd been able to speak at all.
Levi looked back at her, his expression exhausted. He'd barely been able to speak but he thought she deserved to know, especially since she'd just pieced him back together.
Aubrey didn't know what to say. It was hard for her to believe that that stack of clothing was all Levi had left of his former life. It seemed so… cruel.
She met his gaze again and slowly brought her lips back to his. Aubrey was surprised when his hand tangled in her hair and he pulled her even closer. He'd made the kiss far more intense than she'd thought it would be.
Levi used her lips as a way to ground himself. He tried to lose himself in her rather than lose himself in his thoughts. It worked.
With every second he could feel his mind shifting. The pain faded to the nervousness and hope he had for the future. As long as she stayed by his side, he could get through anything.
Eventually, Levi had to let go when he heard Aubrey gasping for air. He felt a bit guilty. He'd been so lost in her that he'd failed to notice her struggle.
Aubrey pressed her forehead to his and felt the shift in the air. His sadness had eased and now… it was time to go.
Aubrey took a deep breath. Walking out that door would be agonizing… but she knew he could do it.
She grabbed the clothes from between them and then moved out of Levi's lap. He reached after her but she just caught his hand and placed a kiss on his knuckles. She'd be right back.
She placed the clothes in a box and closed it. It was the last thing they'd need to pack away.
Aubrey went back to Levi but stood behind him and hung her arms over his shoulders.
"Let me know when you're ready."
Levi sighed. He wasn't prepared… but he was ready.
"I'm ready. Let's go."
Aubrey nodded and kissed his head before stepping back.
She watched him stand and heard him let out a long breath. His expression was...resigned. He was still in pain but instead of letting it consume him he'd simply… accepted it.
Aubrey leaned down, picked up a box, and walked out the door to set it in the hall. She went back for another and another and saw Levi join her on her third trip.
Finally, they had everything out of the room and Aubrey looked to see Levi repeating his routine last glance. She could imagine the pain he was feeling. This room was the home he'd shared with his best friend, even if it was just a dorm room. It didn't matter. It still held memories.
When Levi turned to her, she saw the decision in his eyes and she held her hand out to him from her spot in the hall.
He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and then with one movement, he crossed the floor, left the room, and put the past behind him.
A/N: This MIGHT be the longest chapter I've ever written lol. I hop it wasn't too repetitive. I know we just cleaned out Aubrey's room last chapter and we had TWO more rooms to clean out this chapter and then we STILL have to clean out their old room in the castle next chapter. But I think I can keep that last one pretty short. Not much trauma to work through in there lol.
BUT, after that there MAY be a smut chapter. I haven't decided yet. I keep feeling like I'm loading this story up with smut but then I realized the last one was like 6 chapters ago which comes out to like 20,000 words sooooo… I don't know. Let me know if you think I'm overloading it.
And, I don't wanna say that Book 2 is getting close because this story somehow keeps getting longer and longer even when I think it's coming to a close but… I think Book 2 is getting close.
I know I beg for comments every time but, like, this time I am REALLY begging for comments. School already has me feeling blah and I NEED the instant serotonin. Like, for real. Also, this chapter took a long time and I am ready for that validation lol. Y'all are seriously the best. I don't know how you even read these author's notes anymore because they are essentially just me repeatedly asking for comments lol.
AND let me know about the smut thing… for real. I need to know if it's too much.
