Last Words

"Daria." Jaheira disapproved and let it be heard in every letter of her ward's name.

"Well, I have good news and bad" the diviner tried to joke. "The good one is..." she stuttered to a halt, unable to think of anything to finish sentence with.

"It was nice to be healed in temple by a slightly startled priest in Amkethran temple" Jeheira started with her voice low. But she was grating her teeth, Daria could already hear the oncoming shout. "But it is starting to become truly grating to once again be treated like a trifling, a toy you can put back in the box and forget about, when you're bored!"

"Jaheira, calm d..." That never worked, but she tried.

"NO! Don't tell me to calm down!" The imminent explosion came. "I'm not some woman you met by the side of the road you can just as well leave behind on another roadside! You're… We're… You're my… I can't just watch you leave and say nothing…!" Instead of escalating her voice broke, her eyes suddenly glassy, all the force going into something Daria didn't expect.

And Jaheira cried.

A punch in a stomach wouldn't be more surprising. Actually it would be well within Jaheira's character. Daria just stared her mouth agape, completely stunned. It was Solaufein who cautiously approached her and placed a hand on her shoulder. The druidess returned the gesture, placing her hand on his. She took a deep shaky breath, composing herself a bit. Only that woke Daria up from shock.

"No! Jaheira, that's not what… I didn't mean...!"

"I understand you don't need my help anymore" Jaheira sighed. "I do. I see how much you've grown, how you stand on your own, I couldn't miss it… I just hoped it wouldn't be so soon…"

"Jaheira!" The sun elf hugged her, trying to pretend that it was all unnecessary, that it was all one big misunderstanding.

"Jaheira, you dolt!" Imoen interrupted, making it a group hug. "My sis isn't going anywhere, don't you worry!"

But it wasn't. Problem was, Jaheira understood everything perfectly. As did Xan. And Sarevok. And that made it…

She stepped away to look at her party, her family, that tagged along with her to change the fate of the realms, because it was the right thing to do, obviously, but also, because they would never leave her to face it alone. There was a lot she had to tell them.

"Minsc" she approached the berserker and hugged him despite the full plate armor. "And Boo. You helped me so much… I think I would have gone mad many times over if not for you. I know you two will be alright no matter what happens, because you, Minsc, have Boo and Boo – you have Minsc. So I'm not worried. You will keep kicking butt!"

"Boo wouldn't put it better himself! Evil beware, where Minsc and Boo go, no evil butt shall escape righteous kicking!"

"Anomen" Daria smiled at her friend. He used to be so full of himself, but the recent travels shook him truly. Only she didn't think it was humility, more like... "I know you doubt yourself now…"

"Do not worry, my friend. It's just… I just need… I shall support you in this battle with all my might. My mace and my shield will… I..."

"Shhh… Do not worry. And don't hurry to the next assignment. The Oghma priests in Candlekeep used to say, that faith cannot grow without experiencing doubt. I think… I don't really know how to help. I wish I could simply give you the answers you seek, but I don't know..."

"It's alright, Daria. You gave plenty already. And besides, I think they wouldn't be worth much, if simply given out." He gave her a small smile.

She answered with her own and turned to Sarevok.

"You are a moron. A great one."

The armored human just glared. This certainly wouldn't be an emotional conversation.

"...but you did help and as an added bonus didn't stab me in the back. That's honestly more than I expected. So let me tell you… Do you remember how you cast away Tomoko to face us all alone under Baldur's Gate, to either regain your trust or die?"

A look of surprise crossed Sarevok's features, but quickly solidified into a blank mask. He remembered. But he wouldn't show that he cared.

"Yes" he seethed out the word.

"Well, she basically decided that enough is enough and ditched your cause. We let her pass without any trouble. She's still alive and returned to Kozakura. I'd tell you where exactly, but you were annoying, so you only get a classical vague prophecy. You listening? There you go:

Three rivers meet

Brisk water rushes to the dam

Words left unsaid." She wasn't exactly proud of those verses, but she was no bard, she did what she could.

"Why… are you telling this to me? And why now?"

"I was hoping you'd get your head from your butt without help. But I grew to know you better and realized you're permanently a moron – that's the way you're built. You are supposed to go and beg for forgiveness, in case you haven't figured that out either."

The former Bhaalspawn put a hand on the hilt of his greatsword, gripped it, his teeth clenched. He took a deep breath. Then he let go.

"I owe you one" he hissed just under his breath, but she heard.

"Solaufein."

"You don't have to say anything. Do anything" he knew what this was. He smiled at her and stepped forward to hold her too. "Five months ago I was hoping for death and honestly, it would have been a mercy. I couldn't imagine being free. And now here I am. On the surface, surrounded by people I can call truthfully friends. Friends! Can you imagine? I never could."

"There is a group of Eilistraee followers that gathers in Myr forest every full moon, in case you ever need help, Jaheira knows the general area. And a small temple in Silverymoon, it's far but..."

"I will be fine, Daria. Truly." He looked at her and she saw tears gathering in his eyes. But he was always so stoic… He held them back and moved forward to hug her.

"Just ask for help if you ever need it" she mothered him just a little bit longer. "It's different here. I know you'll have trouble because of your skin color, but there are good people here. And no bias it impossible to overcome..."

He held her again.

"Imoen."

"That was a nice spectacle, sis. I get it. Building up a bit of tension."

"You know me" Daria gave a weak chuckle. "I love the drama."

"That you do." Imoen's eyes were grassy, but her voice didn't waver one bit. "And don't let anybody tell you otherwise."

She held her sister for the longest time. Stopping it's flow again felt tempting, but no. It had to move forward. This scamp from Candlekeep, that grew up to become a powerful battemage and a clever trickster, would grow even further. And whatever she would do with her life, Daria knew it would be great.

"Jaheira. There are no words to describe how much I owe you."

"Hmph. You could at least try." The druidess had some time to recover, wipe any trace of tears and was now stubbornly pretending she was only grumpy.

"Yes. I should." Daria used the last of her strength not to cry. Battle awaited. There wasn't time for emotions. But she needed to… "Thank you, for making me who I am. For having my back, always. For teaching me even though it must have been a pain, for healing my injuries and the nasty elixirs, and..."

"Not always, Daria… I should have done more" Jahiera was starting to fall apart too. It was so much unlike her. "I want to help you… But you don't need my help anymore. It should make me happy, but..."

"But it only irritates you?"

"Yes." Jaheira admitted, wiping fresh tears before anyone could accuse her of crying again and scowling, trying not to act completely sappy. "Very much so."

'Gooseberry...' Daria reached out to her familiar, the rat scampered on her sleeve onto her shoulder. A warm little furry head pressed to her cheek.

'I'm coming with you, mistress, do not worry.'

"Xan. I..."

He stepped close, just a breath away. Took a stray hair and place it behind her ear, his cool fingertips brushing her cheek. He looked at her as if he was trying to etch her face into his memory forever. She took his hand in hers, placed a kiss on an open palm. What could she say?

"Forgive me..."

"Melamin… There is nothing to forgive. I fell in love in a rising goddess. The days I spent in her arms were the happiest in my entire life."

Sometimes she still doubted him. Because after all this struggle, all this heartache, it couldn't be as easy as simply realizing he fell for her some time along the way… Because why would he? What did she ever bring him, but troubles and hurt? It was easier to believe, that it was some desperate attempt to atone for abandoning her in Spellhold, or an overzealous way to support her mentally in this war… Maybe Imoen bullied him into a confession, or Jaheira asked to pretend, for everybody's sake… She mulled it over every now and then, even tried to subtly ask a few times. And he'd see through her every time and reassure her, over and over, until she finally believed him.

"Xan..." she couldn't stop her tears. This wasn't fair… It was never fair. There was nothing she could tell him, not even the smallest consolation prize, a gesture to show that if she only could… Because it mattered, all of it. The pain and the struggle, the heartache… And at last she gave him hope. And now was taking it away.

"I love you. No matter what, I will always love you."

Xan held her, so she wouldn't see his tears.

Those parting words she had for them were the last she could give. Jaheira was right. One way or the other, that was it a goodbye.