Chapter 40

2020 continues and with it came the great ffnet fail. Glad to be back with you all. Thank you to Team Harpy.

Trigger warning: Some violence is present in this chapter.

***E***

I open the door to the cottage and see her lone figure sitting there and I breathe a sigh of relief.

"Bella. Oh, thank God, Bella."

She looks up and it's not Bella but Alice.

"She's gone." She informs me.

"Where?"

"Just forget it, Edward. She doesn't want to see either of us ever again."

I run to her bedroom and look into her closet. I go back into the living room.

"She'll be back. She didn't take all her clothes."

"Don't you know she doesn't care about her clothes or BAR anymore? She just cares about what you did to her."

"What I did to her is fall in love with her. And marry her."

"And then you turned around and married someone else."

"You know why and the only person I owe an explanation to is Bella."

"She's probably sitting somewhere thinking of all the lies you told her and all the lies I went along with."

"It wasn't all lies."

"You know, I think you are so good at lying that you don't even know what the truth is."

"Thanks a lot, Alice."

"Well why not, Edward? We both grew up with lies and lying and that's what we're good at. But someone like Bella who thinks that honesty is the best policy well, she might not understand too well."

"I was going to be honest as soon as I got the situation under control and everything was working out okay..."

"You should have listened to me months ago!" She yells.

"Then she would've walked out on me! And she certainly wouldn't have married me."

"Oh, well how long do you think your marriage is gonna last now?" She challenges.

"If she wants a divorce then she will just have to ask for it. Then I'll just talk her out of it."

"This is not some kind of real estate negotiation. You can't just rip a woman's heart out and serve it on a platter and expect her to forgive you."

"I know it will take some time."

"I don't think you'll live that long."

"She's angry. Justifiably so but I'll deal with it."

"I don't even know how to deal with it because Bella was my only friend and she hates me and Jasper and Rose are really mad at me. In fact, Edward thanks to you my whole life is a complete mess."

"Alright, alright Alice this is no time for self pity. Just tell me where she went."

"I don't know where she went. Forks maybe!"

"Yes, of course." I get up to leave.

"What are you going to do?"

"I'm gonna go face the music with my family and give her time to get there then I'm going to jet over there and make her listen to me."

"To what? You justifying yourself?"

"No, I'm going to take your advice."

"What advice?"

"Bella is having a hard time sorting out the truth with the lies. I know I love her. I know she is the only woman in the world for me. And finding out about Angela the way that she did must have shaken her confidence in everything."

"Aren't you perceptive?" Alice mutters.

"So what I gotta do is make her believe in me again."

"Edward, what would you have done if Bella had done this to you. Married someone else because of some business deal. Would you be able to forgive her?"

I don't know the answer to that so I just walk out, leaving Alice behind.

"Bigamy, Edward, really?"

My mother's voice is the first one I hear as I walk into the den.

"I can explain."

"Oh really, because it seems to me that you're taking having it all to new extremes." Emmett chimes in.

"It's simply not done, Dear. You don't marry more than one woman at a time." Grandmother admonishes.

"Exactly. My marriage to Angela is not legal."

"What?" Victoria gasps.

"Wonderful, not only have you made a mess of our corporate image but you have both you and James facing possible jail terms."

"Everything is under control," I assure Grandfather.

I ignore their scoffs.

"If you're going to play games you need to play them well." Grandfather blusters.

"And play them with someone else's life please."

I face James. "This wasn't my game to play. You came to me on your hands and knees begging me to marry Angela."

"Oh please, it's not like you didn't get something out of it."

"Shut up, Emmett. You don't have a clue. The way I see it, you all have come out of this pretty well. James is not in jail and the family hasn't been drug through the mud. In fact, I am the only one who seems to have lost something. I may have lost Bella forever, so all of you can shut the hell up."

"And you're telling me that Angela won't retaliate?" Grandfather gets back to the only thing that matters to him.

"I guarantee it."

"Edward, Dear, we aren't polygamists." I go to her.

"Grandmother, I have but one wife. Bella."

"Fingernails and all." My father says, taking a healthy swig of bourbon.

"How are we to know that Angela won't come after James or you for that matter?" My mother asks.

The din rises again as the family talks over themselves.

"Angela is an embezzler."

Blessed silence.

"I see that got your attention." I fill them in on everything Mac found out and suddenly the atmosphere is lighter and happier. Wish I could bask in it.

"Let's have a toast and drink to welcoming the real Mrs. Cullen to the family." I interrupt their celebration and raise my glass.

"This wasn't just a ploy? You didn't marry this young lady just to protect yourself from Angela?" Grandfather asks.

"No, I've loved her for quite some time. I didn't intend to marry her the way I did but I couldn't be happier about it."

"Well now we know what you were up to all those months in Port Angeles." Emmett laughs. "LIving a double life with your rock and roll manager."

"And what's all this nonsense about you being Masen Whitlock?" Thanks, Emmett.

"Grandfather, Masen Whitlock came about one night in a hotel bar in PA and he's been having the time of his life." I smile fondly at the memory.

"I want to know where he got those leather pants." Riley laughs.

"What leather pants?" Victoria asks. She's been filled in but missed the fireworks this evening due to being sick.

"You remember that album cover we showed you. The Idle Rich?"

"That was you? Oh my God. Do you have any groupies?"

"A few," I admit reluctantly.

"What's a groupie?" Grandmother asks.

"Young girls that scream and faint when they see Edward. And try to rip his clothes off."

"Oh, Jesus." My mother puts her head in her hands.

"Are you serious?" My father asks.

"I'm very serious about my music and I'm actually pretty good at it. I'm very proud of Masen Whitlock."

"And this is the CEO of my company."

"Grandfather, I love Masen Whitlock and my wife does too, so I'm gonna have to find a way to keep him around so I don't lose her too."

"This is some kind of strange, premature, mid life crisis, isn't it?"

"You're not listening to me. Bella Swan and Masen Whitlock are the best things to ever happen to me. In fact, I … um… regret not coming clean to begin with. At first, It was more about keeping my rock n roll life away from you but then it became far more important to keep you away from Bella because I was afraid she would… well I was afraid she wouldn't love Edward as much as she loved Masen. And now I can only hope and pray I was wrong."

"How in the devil did you keep this away from everyone?" Mother asks.

"Alice knew but I'm afraid this may have cost her far more than I anticipated."

"Let's see if I understand this. You intend to stay married to Bella and bring her into the fold and take Angela's place."

"She doesn't take anyone's place but her own." I correct.

"Do you intend to continue on with your rocking and rolling?"

"Yes."

"This is absolutely outrageous!"

"Ed, sit down! Edward, do you really truly love her?"

"Yes, I do."

"She's a very refreshing girl." Grandmother smiles.

"Now, I'll readily admit to admiring her many qualities; she's intelligent, she's direct, she's nobody's fool and she has this extraordinary skill with figures."

"Grandfather, you're kind of missing the point," Emmett interjects.

"Yeah, does she want to be a Cullen? God help her." Victoria asks.

"Can she be a Cullen? That's the point." Grandfather asks. "As the wife of Masen Whitlock, she may serve you very well but as the wife of a CEO of a major corporation..."

"Grandfather! I didn't marry her to serve me in some capacity. I married her because I couldn't conceive of my life without her. Now I have no idea where I am going from here or how to convince her to forgive me. But I do know this. Bella is my wife and I have no intention of letting her go. So get used to the idea. I have to go now."

"Where are you going?"

I look at Grandfather and realize he will never get it.

"To find my wife."

***B***

"Bella! Bella" I pound on the Swan's front door. I see Bella's car haphazardly parked in their driveway like she couldn't wait another second to be in her parent's arms.

"Bella! I know you're in there! Please, just talk to me!" I pound again.

The door swings open to reveal a very angry looking Charlie. I back up a few steps.

"You've got a lot of nerve showing your mug around here."

"I need to talk to Bella." I keep a rational calm tone.

"You'll have to go through me first."

"Look, I know the situation looks incredibly bad but if I could just get ten minutes with Bella."

"You won't get even one! Do you have any idea what you've done around here, huh? My little girl has been sitting there crying her eyes out and I outta…" He lunges for me and I back away again.

"Charlie!" Renee blocks him. "Let me handle this."

He and his wife have some sort of silent conversation and he concedes.

"May God have mercy on your soul." Charlie spat at me.

Then it's just Renee and me. Judging by the look in her eyes, I should have taken my chances with Charlie.

She walks away but leaves the door open so I hesitantly step through the doorway.

"What should I call you?"

"Masen is fine."

She whirls around. "Masen is a lie you dreamed up to make a fool out of my daughter."

"That's not the way it was."

"Uh-huh, you wanna know what she's doing right now. Between her crying jags, she is questioning her judgment. She is second guessing her instincts, because of you. What was it? She was too tough, too independent. What, you had to knock her down a few pegs so you can feel like a real man?"

"Renee, you are so wrong. I love Bella."

"Spare her your love. She's in there choking on it right now."

"I know, I know and I feel…"

"Don't." She puts up a hand to stop me as she sits down at her weathered table. "I don't want to know how you feel."

"Listen to me, Bella is my life and without her, there's not one single thing left with any meaning. I made a mistake. A terrible dreadful mistake but I never meant to hurt her."

"Well, you screwed up, Mister, because you did hurt her. More than she's ever been hurt before and believe me, there have been a lot of losers throughout her life." She gets up and starts pacing. "You. I liked you. I made you part of this family. We treated you like a son and then you do this. I hope you're proud of yourself."

I get up, agitated. "Look, this is a waste of time. I need to talk to Bella."

Her eyes flash fire and before I know it a Renee I have never seen comes out.

"Bigamo! Fetuso! Cornutazzo! Nooo, cornutazza e lei! La bimba mia cornutazza ci fece! Ma gli estirpo i coglioni a questo. Glieli strappo a morsi. E poi sottaceto! Come i cetrioli. Cornutazzo. Maledetto. Manco fosse il medioevo." I back away for what seems the hundredth time tonight. I don't know what she's saying but it doesn't seem like I will live much longer.

"Mamma… Mamma, calmati. Ci parlo io. Fammici parlare."

I turn to see Bella who looks dead at me. "I'll listen to whatever it is that Mr. Cullen has to say." She says in English this time.

Renee nods but slams her way out of the kitchen leaving us alone.

"What do you want?"

"A chance to explain. Because if you hear me out, I think you'll understand how this could've all happened. But the most important thing I need you to remember is that I love you. I may have lied but not about that."

"Well, that doesn't matter anymore. You wanna know why? Because I don't love you. In fact, I really think I hate you."

"Please don't say that." I plead.

"Why not? It's the truth. But you know, that's a foreign concept to you, isn't it?"

"Bella. I'm not incapable of telling the truth. That's why I'm here."

"Too little, way too late. I suggest you find your way home before your fancy friends find out you've been slumming again. You know how people like to talk." She walks to the door and opens it.

"Slumming? How could you possibly say that? It wasn't that way and you know it."

"I don't know anything. Suddenly I'm in a world where the moon is on the ground and the ants are crawling in the sky. And from where I'm standing you were ashamed of me. You kept me hidden away like some dirty little secret while you played public life with Angela. I guess she is more suitable as a Cullen then some loud mouthed rock and roller from Brooklyn."

"You can't possibly believe that! Angela isn't even in your league. She isn't fit to even polish your shoes. And if I was ashamed of anyone, it was of myself. Of where I'm from."

"Poor little Cullen." She mocks. "You're really breaking my heart. Born into all that pesky money."

"Will you please just give me a chance to try to explain? I didn't know, the first time I met you I didn't know that I was going to meet the most amazing woman in the world and that I would fall crazily in love with her. I didn't know that stepping onto that stage and playing Masen Whitlock for the night would lead to this hideous mess. Bella, I didn't know that you would fall in love with me and that was the biggest surprise of all. That you would love me for who I am, inside. Not the money, not the name, just me. And that was so unbelievable, that was such a gift and the thought of losing you made me want to crawl into a hole and die. So I just put off the truth and a week here and a month there and there were times I really thought I could tell you but I just couldn't find the words. And then external forces started to interfere and the lie took on a life of its own. It multiplied and it just kept increasing and I didn't know how to get out of it. I didn't know how to make it stop."

"Why would you want to? You had quite the little setup, didn't you? I mean, me at the cottage and Angela…" She turns to face me. "How long you've been sleepin' with her, huh? Years?"

"No, Bella, no. I never slept with her. Okay, I did years ago when we had a short relationship but never since I met you. I swear."

"You expect me to believe that? You expect me to believe that your marriage was in name only? That she let that happen? I may be gullible but I'm not stupid!"

"Bella, calm down."

"Masen, you broke my heart! How could you?" She screams at me then starts sobbing.

"I'm so sorry. From the depths of my soul, I am sorry and I am ashamed. I lied to the only person I love in the world, not once, not twice but over and over again."

"Every day was a lie."

"Except for how I felt. That was as honest as I've ever been, as honest as any person can possibly be. And I know there's not much I can justify what I did except to say I couldn't lose you."

"I never lied to you. Not once." The look on her face is heartbreaking.

"Angela was blackmailing my family."

"So you say."

"It's true."

"How?" I decide to tell her because what else do I have to lose?

"James was inadvertently responsible for the death of a man."

"Inadvertently?" She scoffs. "Jeez, you Cullens slay me. You could justify anything, can't you? You either kill a man or you don't."

"It was an accident. There was a fight. He fell and broke his neck. But he was scum; he was an abuser and a child molester."

"So no great loss, right? Especially not stacked up against the almighty Cullens. Boy, I wish I had never left Bensonhurst." She mutters.

"Instead of calling the police, James decided to continue the evening as if nothing unusual had happened. So Jay Jenks became a flat tire that delayed his arrival at a banquet. Eventually, other members of the family became involved in the coverup and Angela got ahold of the evidence implicating James and she used it."

"To marry you."

"Yes."

"Mr. Wonderful." She mocks.

"No, but I'm rich and my family is powerful. Anyway, I allowed myself to be pressured into that horror of a marriage only after ensuring it wasn't legal and then only to buy enough time to neutralize her."

"Why didn't you tell me this while it was going on?"

"You would've left me."

"You don't know that. Hell, I don't even know that. You robbed me of my right to make that choice. That is the most pompous and arrogant thing I've ever heard of. Why don't you go on back home to your family? Why don't you trample on someone else's heart cause mine has sure had enough."

"I won't let you go."

"You can't make me stay. And I want my ring back." She takes hers and throws it on the table where it circles a few times then lands.

"No, never." I close my hands into fists and put them behind my back.

"Fine. You keep it as a souvenir. You could pierce your nose and wear it on your face for all I care. You just get the hell out of my face!" She screams at me. I pull her into my arms to try to get her to calm down. She yanks herself away then lands a solid punch to my solar plexus taking my breath away. I double over as she screams at me.

"Don't you ever do that! Do you hear me? Never!"

Charlie runs in. "What's going on in here?"

"Mr. Cullen was just leaving."

"You heard her! Get out!"

"Alright I'll go but this isn't over Bella." I wheeze out.

"Just go before I physically throw you out." He orders.

I walk away to the sound of her sobbing and her father's desperate pleas for her to calm down. I don't make it to my car before I collapse to my knees and join her as sobs rack my own body.

Playlist

Holding on and letting go - Ross Cooperman

Consequences- performed by Camilla Cabello

Don't Go Away- BuckCherry

Last Night I Woke The Fuck Up- Jon Bellion

Translations from the wonderful LaMomo.

Renee: "Bigamous! Bigamous! Despicable man! Bloody Cuckold! Nooo, she's been made into a cuckold. My baby, he made into a cheated, cuckolded wife. But I'll cleave out his balls, this guy. I'll bite them off his groin. And then I'll pickle them. Just like cucumbers. Cuckold. Damned cuckold. Middle Ages, not even the Middle Ages."

Bella: "Ma... Ma, calm down. I'll talk to him. Let me talk to him."

See you Wednesday.