Barba rushed into the hospital, happy it was not yet 5PM. He hoped Olivia finally had an appetite, and that she would enjoy the food he ordered for her. He sprinted to the front desk, placed the bag of food down next to him, and scribbled his name quickly on the guest sign in sheet. As he grabbed the bag of food off the floor next to him, he caught a nurse smiling in his direction. The closer he got to Olivia's room the calmer he felt. By the time he exited the elevador, he had almost no anxiety, but that was short lived. When Olivia's room came into view, he was hit by fresh waves of fear and anger. He walked faster, and finally he was standing in front of his best friend's unguarded hospital room. He took a deep breath. His green eyes slowly focused on a man strolling up to the room with a cup of coffee in hand.
"Hi Mr. Barba." The officer said, as though he didn't have a care in the world.
"How long have you been gone?" Barba said in a low angry voice. The officer was silent.. "Let me rephrase. Officer Peterson, How long has this room been unguarded?"
"Let me explain, the officer said.
"How long?""Barba asked, getting argier by the second.
"A while.
"As long as Lieutenant Benson is in this hospital, she is supposed to have 24 hour security."
"I know."
"And you leave her? For what? To get coffee. If you need a break, you call someone to cover for you. You could have asked me to bring you some coffee. You don't leave her alone."
Barba walked closer to the hospital room door, and opened it. His green eyes took in the sight of his best friend lying in the hospital bed, He walked as quietly as he could into the room. In front of the bed was a small table on wheels, he placed the food bag on it. He approached Olivia and gently placed his right hand on top of hers. She was warm and breathing. He watched her sleep for a moment, before walking out again. He was not done with officer Shawn Peterson.
Shawn Peterson watched as Barba quietly shut the door. He watched as Barba walked in his direction and stopped in front of him. The officer saw that Barba was livid and trying hard to cope with all the emotions swirling inside him. "I'm sorry." officer Peterson said, "What do you want me to do?" He regretted speaking the second he heard himself.
"What do I want you to do? I want you to do your job. If you can't do it, find another way to make a living." Barba's courtroom voice dripped with outrage, but he kept it quiet. He didn't want to disturb patients or staff. He wanted things done right, he wanted Olivia protected.
"I know you're pissed off". officer Peterson replied in a thick Brooklyn accent . "I get it. The Lieutenant... she doesn't want me around, and I don't blame her. I wouldn't want to be watched." Barba silently shook his head in disgust. It was a waste of time to say anything more to Shawn Peterson. it would only make things worse.
"I'm sorry." He heard officer Peterson repeat. Barba ignored him, and quickly walked back into Olivia's room closing the door behind him. He found Olivia sitting up in bed.
"Counselor What's wrong?" She asked, a mixture of happiness, and worry in her voice.
"Nothing", he answered. He wanted to say I can't believe they put such an idiot in charge of your security, but he kept his mouth shut.
"Rafa talk to me." He walked toward the bed, and sat in the chair beside it.
"Nothing now." He replied looking into his best friend's beautiful brown worry filled eyes. He gave her a half smile before speaking again. "How are you?" He asked softly.
"I'm fine."
"Are you sure?" He said looking at her intently, She looked away, and grabbed the hospital blanket. She pulled it up to her chin.
"Yes. I'm fine. I'm worried about Noah, and I'm worried about you. What's wrong?"
"You're in here. That's what's wrong." He answered softly. "As for Noah, I keep checking in on him. He's OK. He misses you, but he's ok." How are you feeling?"
Olivia covered her mouth then coughed. She winced, coughing hurt her ribs. "I'm on the mend. I can't wait to get out of here. I want to see my son."
"I know." I need to give Fin a call."
"You can call anyone you want, but if it's about Shawn Peterson don't... please."
"You know about that?"
"I know I told him he could take a break."
"He said you didn't want him around "
"I don't."
"Liv, that doesn't excuse him from doing his job."
"I can take care of myself. I don't need a security detail."
"You do, I'm sorry to say it Liv, but you do."
"I'm fine. I'll be fine."
"I know."
"I'm not a civilian Rafa."
"I know. You're a cop in a hospital bed. If Officer Peterson was guarding someone else, and he stepped away from them would you tell me to forget about it? Would you forget about it?"
"You're concerned., and I appreciate it." Olivia replied.
"Not concerned Liv, terrified. You didn't answer my questions." He was about to repeat them when he heard Olivia softly speak.
"No, I wouldn't tell you to forget it, I wouldn't forget it. You don't know how many times I've lectured other officers for leaving when they shouldn't have."
"And when you lecture them what do you say?" Barba asked, raising an eyebrow.
"I tell them never to leave a victim alone. I am not a victim.."
"Ok, In your opinion, did Finn have a good reason to order security? Let me rephrase if someone else were in your current situation would you order round the clock security for them?"
"Yes."
"So what you're saying is it's not ok for an officer to leave someone unguarded, unless that someone is you."
"Drop it Barba... please. Change the subject."
Barba sighed. " What do you want to talk about?"
"How was the trial today?" Olivia asked.
"It was a good day for the people and a bad day for Mr. Paul Gibson." Barba answered with a confident smile.
"Good work Counselor. I wish I was there to see it."
"You'll be back in the courtroom soon."
"I know." Olivia forced herself to say. She fought the urge to say everything she was feeling in this moment, but she was ashamed. Some of her feelings were scary, but some were silly.
"I had a meeting with Rollins and Carisi today right after court."
"Really you had time for that? Court must have let out very early then."
"It did."
"That doesn't worry you. It worries me." Olivia admitted.
"Not this time Liv. I think it's a good sign."
'You do?" Olivia asked, surprised.
"Yes, and it gave me some time."
"I know you feel you have to be here with me, but is it good for the case?"
"Yes, as I said, it was a good day for the people and a bad day for Paul Gibson."
"Good." Olivia said. Barba could hear the relief in her voice. He didn't want to take that relif away, but he couldn't keep secrets from her.
Barba sighed softly, and then spoke. "I met the happy couple at Anglo's restaurant. He watched as Olivia's body siffened a little. "I brought some food for us from there. Carisi said you ate there, and liked it."
"It's good, I haven't eaten there in awhile."
"Liv, They told me they ran into you with the doctor. at the restaurant months ago." Barba said softly. His instincts told him he would get further with his best friend in conversations involving Dr. Taylor, if Dr. Taylor was not mentioned by name. "They gave me the impression that he was pushy."
"Did they?" Olivia replied sarcastically , trying to mask her emotions, something she was normally a master at, but found it extremely difficult to do now. It had nothing to do with the fact that she was in a hospital bed. It had to do with Rafael Barba, for some reason he read her like a book, it wasn't helping that his green eyes were locked onto her. A part of her wanted to look away from his gaze, it would be safer that way, but another part of her was afraid to look away. "I handled the doctor." She answered, never breaking eye contact.
"I also spoke to the owner of the restaurant, Anglo. He was worried about you. He gave me the food on the house, and even threw in some cake. He talked about the first time you came in. He got the impression that the doctor didn't like that he was speaking to you. Anglo is Carisi's cousin by the way."
"That's why I looked familiar to him." Olivia replied in a surprised whisper.
Barba nodded his head, keeping his green eyes on her. "He recognized you from a Christmas card Carisi sent. The card has a picture of the squad. I'm a little offended that I wasn't included in it." Barba said, trying to sound light-hearted.
"I remember the day last year we took a photo for Carisi's annual Christmas card. I tried to get you to come to the squad room, You said you couldn't make it down."
"Why?""
"You were too busy panicking over the possibility of a not guilty verdict."
"Last November. You came to my office an hour later. You insisted I drink some tea, and you gave me a chocolate bar. I was a wreck, but you calmed me down."
"No I didn't, you got your guilty verdict, that's what calmed you down."
"You calmed me down." He repeated. Olivia felt instantly comforted, not only by Barba's words, but by his voice which in that moment was a mixture of seriousness and gentleness.
"I'm glad." She answered softly.
"You want to eat. I got us chicken cutlets."
"I'm not hungry. You can eat the whole thing, you can have it for 2 meals."
"Have you been eating?"
"I've been eating enough. I want to go home."
"I know hospital food is bad, that's why I brought you lunch or dinner, whatever you want. " Before Olivia could respond, there was a knock on the door, and Dr. Wilder entered the room.
"Hi Olivia." The young woman said.
"I'll give you some time. I'm not going far. I'll be right outside. Let me know when you want me." Barba said getting up quickly, and leaving the room.
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15 minutes passed before Dr. Wilder exited Olivia's room, and softly closed the door behind her. She turned to find Rafael Barba standing right outside waiting. "Dr. Wilder, how is she?" Barba asked.
The young doctor walked to Barba and stood right in front of him. "She's healing physically. As of right now she doesn't have a fever. I'm hoping she'll get her appetite back soon." She's exhausted, and her ribs are very sore."
"Will she be able to go home soon?"
"Mr. Barba", Dr. Wilder said slowly. "The only reason I'm able to give you information on her condition is because when she regained consciousness, she gave me permission to do so. I would release her with some doctor's orders, but she has no one to help her.
"I want her to come home with me. Are you saying you would release her today?"
"If she had someone to help her, yes." Dr, Wilder answered.
"She does."
"I can release her tomorrow in the late afternoon to give you some time to prepare."
"I don't need that much time. I want her out of here as soon as possible." Barba replied quickly. "How long would it take you to tell me what I need to know."
"Not long. I need to check on another patient. I'll come find you when I'm done."
"I'll be right here." Barba replied quickly.
"Talk to Olivia." The young doctor said, turning from Barba, and walking away. Barba smiled. He glanced at Officer Peterson, who looked afraid, He wanted to say something to the officer, but once again he held his tongue. He turned the doorknob and reentered Olivia's room.
"What if I told you, you could have a nice dinner outside of this hospital.?" Barba said excitedly to his best friend.
"How?" Olivia asked.
"Dr. Wilder will release you under certain conditions."
"I can go home?"
"Come home with me Liv." Barba said, his voice taking on a begging tone.
"What?" Olivia asked, shocked.
"I've been meaning to talk to you about it. I think you should stay with me."
"No, I can't."
"Yes, you can, and Dr. Wilder won't release you unless you have someone who can help you."
"Then I'll have to wait or sign myself out against doctor's advice."
"Liv, I want you with me." He pleated.
"I can't. I can't do that to you."
"Liv, the only thing you would be doing is making me feel better. Please, I promise I want you with me. You have someone to help you."
"You don't have enough room."
"I have plenty of room."
"You don't have room for Noah, and I need to see my son."
"I have plenty of room." Barba repeated, His eyes once again locked with hers..
"I can't." Olivia said, her voice breaking.
It tore Barba up inside to see tears in the eyes of Olivia Benson, and suddenly he had a thought, "I'll be right back. If Dr. Wilder comes in, don't let her leave. I'll be right back Liv." He exited the room before Olivia could say a word. He ran outside to the hospital parking lot, took out his cell phone, and dialed. He put the phone to his ear and waited.
"Hello?"
"Mami, Mami, I need your help. please."
