Chapter 35 – Motherhood

The low thump of the music playing from her phone played through her headphones and into her head. The pencil in her hand almost matching its' beat as she sketched along the page. Her hand moving in a slight diagonal movement, wanting the skirt to be more long than puffy. Her hand followed the line and then down and around in a semi-circle. She stopped and held the sketch up. Her long, shiny black hair falling by the side of her face as she took a moment to look at what would be the beginning. The design had been keeping her up at night. She had to draw it, so here she was sitting up on her bed at 3am, the low light of the lamp giving her room a golden glow. Her pencils were strewn across the light pink duvet while her soccer cleats lay tossed on the floor. Everyone else was still asleep in the house. This was when she loved to sketch. In the quiet of the early morning.

She searched and picked up the faintest shade of pink and began shading in the shadows of her dress. She didn't want stark white, just a hint of champagne pink. Finishing, she drew in her own neck and face above the sweetheart neckline. She drew her hair half up, half down…her current favorite way to wear it. She sketched in her mother's high cheekbones but the depths of her father's eyes. While Stevie always looked just like her mother and Jason just like their father, she was the perfect mix of the two.

It is exactly what her parents saw, except now they were looking at the beautiful young woman their daughter had become and not the 17 year old. Elizabeth thought back to the morning she bounced herself on to their bed, holding her sketch while she packed for a State Department trip. "Mom, look. If I ever get my own company, THIS will be my wedding dress!" Elizabeth had immediately stopped her packing and sat. Together, they looked over the sketch and Elizabeth told her how beautiful it was and how she couldn't wait to see her in it. Now, here stood her youngest daughter in the wedding dress of her dreams.

"Oh Noodle…it is even more beautiful than the sketch. You look gorgeous and all grown up," she was wiping a tear from her eye.

Henry stepped out of their bedroom into the common area and stopped in his tracks. He hadn't seen either of them in their gowns yet. For him it was a sight to behold. Alison looked just as stunning as her mother, if not more.

"Oh Allie. You look so beautiful. Everything about that dress is all you. Perfect in every way." He stepped over to Elizabeth and handed her a tissue. "Babe, you are going to ruin your makeup." As he did, he checked out her whole body, which was wrapped in the most, striking Caribbean blue dress. It hugged every curve and showed off her amazingly flat abs.

She turned to him and said, "You are looking quite perfect yourself. God, I love you in this tux." It wasn't the first time in his life, he was awestruck by the intensity in her eyes. But, the color of this dress brought out more blue. They drew him in as he kissed her.

With that the door opened and in came, Stevie, Sarah and Annie all dressed in beige champagne colored dresses. Eliza toddled in carrying a basket of flowers and wearing a white dress, with a pink sash that matched her aunt's dress. The sash was hanging down in the back.

"Mom, I couldn't get the bow to stay. Can you…?" Stevie sighed to her mother. "I think it's because I just can't really bend over anymore."

Elizabeth nodded and leaned over to tie the ribbon in the back of Eliza's dress. Henry was more than happy to catch a glimpse of her backside, thinking nobody saw. But, Annie did and she rolled her eyes, "Uncle Henry, save THAT for later!" For the first time in the last two days, the whole family laughed as Elizabeth smacked him on the arm.

Henry moved to Stevie and whispered to her, "You okay?"

She looked back at her father, "I will be. Just need to get through today. I just want Allie to be happy."

For the second time in her Presidency, Elizabeth walked down the aisle escorted by Jason. Walking down, he said, "We did the right thing. Keeping today for Allie."

She looked at her son and smiled, "I agree." She took the first seat in the first row. The seat Secret Service had chosen for her so she wouldn't be blocked by anyone. The one right in front of Conrad, again at Secret Service's request.

She turned and watched as Annie walked down the aisle a confident teenager who had put her past in the past. She grinned from ear to ear. Henry's niece Sarah followed. Stevie then took her place in line showing the world her beautiful smile to hide the pain. Elizabeth's heart was breaking but she would never show it.

The crowd all sighed and laughed as little Eliza, a mini of both her mother and grandmother, toddled her way down the aisle, her blonde curls falling on her shoulders. She left light pink rose petals for her aunt to walk by. When she got to the end, she surprised everyone and stepped to Liam to kiss him on the cheek. She then ran to her mother's side, a little shy from the oohs and laughter. Conrad, placed a hand on Elizabeth's shoulder. She tapped it back. He was the big brother she never had. Lydia was next to him and then Will.

The tune from the violins changed and everyone stood. The aisle for this wedding was much longer than the Stevie's. Anyone who was anyone in the fashion industry was there, celebrities she had designed for, Elizabeth's donors and other politicians who had to be on the guest list. No matter the length, as if he was holding a baby, the sight of Henry walking their daughters down the aisle, left Elizabeth breathless.

Alison walked with in her masterpiece of a dress. Everything was perfect. When they got to the end, Henry leaned in and whispered in her ear, kissed her cheek and shook Liam's hand. As he stepped away, Eliza ran over and took his hand. Henry sat down next to Elizabeth and scooped Eliza up onto his lap. She snuggled into him. It had been a day for her. She had asked for her "Daddy" more than once or twice. Now, she clung to the next best thing, her grandfather. Elizabeth handed her the pink bunny blanket that had become her lovey and she began to close her eyes.

Elizabeth turned and looked at her three grown children. Pregnancy still made Stevie glow and she looked so much like her mother. Elizabeth marveled at her strength. She's about to lose her own husband while her sister stands here marrying hers. Jason stood proudly. As he's grown he looks more and more like Henry. So handsome in a tux. She was proud that he had finally come around to college and managed to find his place at Harvard. She saw the looks between him and Claudia and it took her back to her college days with Henry. She was just as smitten as Claudia was and Jason was just as hung up like Henry.

Her eyes gazed over to Alison, earlier today seeing her in the gown she created at age 17, Elizabeth saw her 8 years old "Noodle" dressed in a white dress with a pink sash for Will's wedding. She was fighting with Elizabeth, who was trying to desperately to get her hair done. She could always get Stevie's hair done in minutes because she just let her parents do it. But, not Allie, she knew exactly how she wanted to look and fought for just the right look every time.

Months earlier, her cellphone rang at 10pm. Elizabeth and Henry had just gotten into bed. Elizabeth and the girls had just returned from New York only a few hours before. She looked and it was Allie.

"Hey Noodle, what's wrong?" Elizabeth answered.

"Do you love the dress? Because I really started having second thoughts tonight. I could tell by the look on your face that you weren't thrilled. I really love it, but if you hate it, I can change it. I can wear a different dress or redesign it in white. Or ivory? How about ivory because I really hate white?" Allie was rambling and whining at the same time.

Elizabeth rolled her eyes at Henry while he put his book down on his lap and pulled his glasses off.

"Noodle…wait…stop. What is going on? Your dress is beautiful. It looks gorgeous on you! I love it." Elizabeth answered back, while pointing to the phone and giving Henry the "I have no idea what is going on' look.

"I just got the feeling you didn't like the pink shading of the fabric." Allie whined back to her.

"Baby, I love the dress. This is your wedding. I love the dress but you don't need my approval. You're an adult and you know way more about fashion than I do. We are so so proud of you. Stick with the dress. It has been your dream since age 17." Elizabeth rested her head back on the headboard.

"Really?! Because remember that time I got you that flowered dress for Mr. Dalton's Inauguration? I was having a moment just like that." They both laughed. Elizabeth assured her again and they hung up. She slid down in the bed as Henry took the phone out of her hand.

"You're not happy the dress is pink?" His voice was low almost a whisper. She turned over to look at him and her face was scrunched up.

"That bad?" he asked again.

"Not my choice, Henry." She rolled over.

Here Alison stood now, looking more beautiful than ever. The color was stunning. Her hair pulled in the back like dark ribbons. During the vow, she turned and smiled back at her parents. Elizabeth was struck that even though they wrote their own vows separately both she and Liam paid tribute to the lessons learned from their own parents' marriages. Elizabeth was so very proud of her. She was building her family and an amazing, successful business.

A couple of hours later, she and Henry were dancing at the reception. As they moved around, Stevie sitting at one of the round tables, smiling caught her eye. Elizabeth stopped them from moving. Henry swayed her back and forth while she couldn't believe what she was seeing.

"Stevie is sitting with Andrew Hill," she whispered in Henry's ear.

"What?" Henry turned and looked over her shoulder. He saw the same look on Stevie's face that Elizabeth did. "Oh boy."

"Henry," she said gently, emphasizing the first part of his name while trailing the back end. "It's way too soon. She still has so much to go through." She tensed in his arms.

"I will talk to her tomorrow morning." He glanced around at another scene in the room. "Oh boy. Look."

They both turned and there was Jason with Eliza in his arms, dancing with her and twirling her around. He put her down and he and Claudia held her hands while the three of them swayed back and forth to the music.

Elizabeth smiled up at him and said, "I love that girl…both of them." Henry smiled back at her and said, "Me too."

The night was coming to a close. Alison dressed in a cream colored dress with short sleeves hugged Elizabeth. She held on tight to her baby girl. "Noodle, you were so beautiful today and so strong in the face of everything that is going on. I am really so, so proud of you and we love Liam like he was our own."

She didn't want to let her go but knew she had to do so. Alison eyes brightened as she smiled back at her mother. "I love you, Mom."