A/N
This chapter was pretty much a 'honorable mention' sort of chapter for the songs. I had so many songs running through my head and not nearly enough made it into the story or even this chapter. Write that final review for me guys, let me know if I missed any loopholes or if it ended horribly or wonderfully. Tell me you're favorite part of the whole story! I WANNA KNOOOOOOOW!
It's a classic "me" mistake
"She's really beautiful you know." Gajeel sat on the grass, a guitar in his hand as he absently strummed while he spoke. "And Levy. Ah, man. Levy was a fucking trooper. Not even you could have found a fault with her Minnie." He smiled at the stone in front of him as he continued, "I was scared shitless the first few days, still kinda am really. I didn't want to crush her she's so tiny. Compared to her, I feel like an oaf ready to break her at any sudden movement. Levy has helped me with holding her and changing her. She does so much for our daughter and it's only been a week. Minnie, I'm scared I'm gonna fuck her up. She deserves the best father and sometimes I'm not sure that its me."
He let his mind drift on his tangent before he focused back on to his friend's grave. "Anyways, I'm about forty days sober now and I forget which step it is but I know that part of recovery is apologizing to those you've done wrong. Besides Shorty, there ain't no one I've done more wrong to than you."
Gajeel furrowed his brow as he stared at the artwork etched into the stone. "So, uh…" he hesitated, not sure where all this emotion came from as his eyes filled up with tears. "I…. uh…. I'm just so sorry babe." He did not bother to wipe the salty tears that fell down his face. Instead, Gajeel just let them fall freely as he was finally given a chance to truly mourn his close friend. "I know I treated you like shit when all you wanted was love. I could not be the guy you wanted me to be for you. It was impossible."
Someone gives me love and I throw it all away
He stopped strumming to finally wipe his eyes. "I hope you don't think I've forgotten about you. You were one of my best friends Minnie. Even if you weren't 'the one', we still had something special. I'm sorry that our last moment was me treating you like trash. If anyone does that to my daughter, I'm going to teach him or her a very painful lesson."
Tell me have I gone insane?
Smiling at the thought of his little one, he kept going. "She's got my nose and a head full of black curls. Looks just like me, the poor little squirt. Except for her eyes," Gajeel closed his eyes to picture her in his head, "It's still too soon to tell, but I know. I wouldn't have it any other way. She's got her mother's eyes."
Gajeel readjusted his guitar and started playing with a purpose, "So anyway, with this new sobriety, I've got a lot of free time to pick up old new hobbies; Hence, the guitar." He started the opening rifts of a song that he knew Minerva would love, "So, uh, I'm gonna play for you for a while if you don't mind."
Talkin' to myself but I don't know what to say
Sometimes you gotta lose somebody
And he did.
But I'm a creep; I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here
Gajeel played through every song he could remember and even played a few that he had written himself.
But tell me, did you sail across the sun?
Did you make it to the Milky Way to see the lights all faded
Everywhere around him suddenly darkened as rain began to fall around Gajeel in the cemetery. "Tch. Figures I'd get rained out trying to play for you."
Cause only you can save me now from this misery
I've been lost in my own place, and I'm gettin' weary
How far is heaven?
He scowled at the dark clouds, "This better not be you trying to stop me from playing!"
I don't know how I got this way;
I know it's not alright
So, I'm breaking the habit
He half-heartedly shook a fist to the sky, "Jokes on you Minnie! I've got no qualms about playing in the rain!"
Such a lonely day; and it's mine
The most loneliest day of my life
Gajeel kept on playing.
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
Singing and crying.
In a crowd of strangers and lovers
Someone told me that you were coming
Laughing and apologizing.
Where are you? And I'm so sorry
I cannot sleep, I cannot dream tonight
Every so often he stopped and shared a memory or two.
My heart is just too dark to care
I can't destroy what isn't there
By the time he was finished, Gajeel was soaked to the bone. He stood up to leave, stretching out his stiff limbs from sitting in the grass for so long. "I'm gonna be better Minnie." Gajeel could feel his eyes begin to sting again with his tears. "For your memory and for my daughter's future." Raindrops mixed with his tears as he continued to stare at the wet stone. It did not go unnoticed that this could have easily been where he ended up. It damn near was. He had brushed so close to the unknown and it had grasped him firmly. The only thing that he could grip on to was his daughter and his love for Levy.
He couldn't help but think at how sad it all was. Every memory. Everything she ever did. All of it was summed up right there on that stone.
A year of birth.
A year of death.
A thin, blurred line in between.
If Heaven and Hell decide that they both are satisfied
Gajeel finally turned to leave, walking towards a black sedan. After getting in, he sat there for a moment, not caring that his brand new interior was getting soaked from his own wetness. He needed to gather his thoughts and emotions. I'm sorry, he thought one last time before putting the car into gear and heading home.
~Levy POV~
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs
Levy was sitting in a rocking chair in her new apartment. She was so tired. Having to physically produce milk and feed her daughter was definitely a recipe for no sleep and overtiredness. She was sure there was baby spit up in her hair and she wasn't quite sure she properly disposed of that last diaper, but Levy was so happy and full of joy that everything else seemed worth it. It had only been a week since she gave birth but it was the happiest week that Levy had ever experienced.
She was humming a nursery rhyme to her newborn as she tried to burp the baby after eating. The baby girl cooed in contentment while being lulled to sleep. Levy heard the front door open and close. She stopped humming when she heard a familiar gruff voice call out her name. Not wanting to wake the baby, she stood up to meet Gajeel in the living room.
"There are my girls," Levy smiled as Gajeel beamed a huge smile at the two of them.
Levy noticed his arms reaching out to grab their daughter but she swatted his arms away, "Not until you go put on some dry clothes." Although happy with his new found confidence to hold the newborn, there was no way Levy was going to let her near Gajeel while he was soaking wet from the rain.
If there's no one beside you when your soul embarks
She laughed as his face instantly went sour. "Tch. Fine-uh." Gajeel trudged to their bedroom to change. Their bedroom. Levy loved the sound of that.
This is going to be great, she thought to herself. It's going to be hard. We still need to both finish school and find jobs. And raising a child together is going to be no joke, but so long as we're together, I know we can do it.
Levy was so focused on her thoughts; she did not notice Gajeel come back out all dried up. He walked up behind her and gently wrapped his arms around both Levy and their daughter. She could feel the pressure of his lips on the top of her head as he kissed her softly. "How are my two favorite people in the world?"
Meow.
"Of course you too, Lily. How could I forget?"
"Mmmm. We're fine. She's just finished eating if you want her."
"Nah, I think I'll stay like this for just a bit longer." Gajeel tightened his hold around them and gently swayed.
Levy held on to him with the arm that wasn't supporting her daughter's head and closed her eyes. Safe, she thought as they held each other. Safe and home.
Then I'll follow you into the dark
~~~Author's Note~~~
WOOOOOOOOW WE DID IT GUYS! THE STORY IS OVER! Okay, maybe...just maybe, I have an epilogue to add. Should I post it? Let me know!
Sorry if this chapter was hard to read but I wanted to convey the time he spent at the grave/different memories they had shared.
Song Credits:
Kygo & One Republic : Lose Somebody
Radiohead : Creep
Train : Drops of Jupiter
Los Lonely Boys : How Far is Heaven?
Linkin Park : Breaking the Habit
System of a Down : Lonely Day
Goo Goo Dolls : Iris
Dan + Shay : I Should Probably Go To Bed
Blink 182 : I Miss You
Slipknot : Snuff
Death Cab For Cutie : I Will Follow You Into the Dark
