So! New Chapter! Probably the last of the christmas ones for a while. (Though I could change my mind).
Mending Bridges
After having seen Santa's Workshop before, it was odd for it to be so empty now. Devoid of toys and having no elves or yeti's scrambling around getting things done.
It made sense. They'd been working all year to get everything ready for Christmas, and since it was Christmas they were taking a day off before getting right back to making toys.
Jackie stood in the far back. Her arms crossed in front of her, as she watched the Guardians and her mom and uncle mingle with each other.
It was early in the morning, Jackie had been woken up at around 6 in the morning by Phill the Yeti, Santa so they could welcome Santa back to the Pole. Sleeping in the Workshop had been interesting but there was a part of her that wished she had slept over at Sarah's.
Mom had told her that if she would prefer to have the sleepover at Sarah's they could do that instead, but a part of her had wanted to see Santa's Workshop, Sarah had insisted that visiting Santa's Workshop would be fine, and despite her mother's insistence that everything would be fine no matter what Jackie chose. Jackie also knew that her mother wanted to visit the Workshop again, see Bunny, and Tooth, North, and Sandy.
But now that she was here, she suddenly felt small. Everyone here bigger than life and Jackie was so small, so young, and still suffering from the nightmare's that Pitch had been inflicting on her for months.
Maybe it would have been better if she-
"Hey."
Jackie blinked as she was torn out her musings and turned her head to stare at her father.
"Hello." She said quietly.
"Merry Christmas," Jack said with a soft smile.
"Merry Christmas," Jackie said with a nod but unable to think of anything else to say.
Jack seemed just as lost as Jackie was on what to say next.
"Ready to open gifts?" Jack asked as though the thought just came to him.
Jackie looked down and shrugged. "I guess?" She crossed her arms in front of her to hide the frost growing on her hands. Jack had been trying to help her control her emotions, but it was a constant work in process. Especially given how uncomfortable she was around him.
Jack went quiet. "It's annoying being the youngest person in the room isn't it?"
Jackie looked down. "I'm always the youngest it's nothing I'm not used to." She said softly.
"I was once the youngest person here," Jack said. "Newest guardian, decades younger than the next youngest guardian. I felt out of place too."
At least they knew you existed. Jackie thought.
"And before that, not one of them wanted anything to do with me."
Yeah, after you spent the past three centuries causing trouble for the Guardians.
"Cept for Sandman, he was always pretty chill with me," Jack said. "Always had a few good dreams to spare for me."
Jackie nodded softly. I was invisible to all the guardians including Sandman. Be thankful for what little attention you received, had any of the Guardians listened, Pitch wouldn't have had such a hold on me. Jackie shook her head. She didn't want to feel so bitter. Besides she wasn't ignored by all the mythical beings that helped children. The Befana had come over like clockwork every Epiphany leaving her shoes filled to the brim with candy and fruit.
That thought made her feel a bit better.
"Little Jackie Bennet, why don't you come here and open present," North shouted over to her.
Jackie shrugged and made her over to North. She knelt on the floor and sighed and took the package that Toothiana had passed her she smiled hesitantly at Tooth's warm smile.
She shook the package lightly and stared up at everyone smiling down at her, as though they hadn't ignored her mother for years. As though they hadn't left her mother and uncle out in the cold on her second Christmas.
Her hands frosted over. "Before…Before I open gifts can I use the washroom?" She asked.
"Of course," North said.
Jackie nodded once and before anyone could say anything she turned and walked out of the Globe room.
The minute she was out of sight she sprinted into the bathroom and shut the door behind her and broke down in tears. The bathroom tiles frosted over as her emotional control died on her.
She should be happy. Finally, after 10 years of none of the Guardians acknowledging her existence, she had it. So why wasn't she happy? Why was she so angry, and hurt, and feeling as though she was going to explode from all the pain?
She tried to keep her cries at a low volume so the others wouldn't notice that she was crying. They would ask why, and she couldn't tell them why when she didn't know why she was crying in the first place.
They saved her, had dropped everything to rescue her from Pitch. Didn't that mean something?
They only rescued you so you wouldn't become another Pitch.
Jackie covered her ears with her hands. "That's not true." She whispered to herself. "They care about children all children."
All children who appear on the globe. You don't have a light on the globe and are of absolutely no use to them.
Jackie's breathing started to become erratic she could almost feel her teeth vibrating as she tried to get a handle on herself.
"Jackie?" She hears her mother call. "Are you alright sweetie?"
She was drowning, but she didn't want her mother to worry. "I'm fine." She called out and winced as her voice cracked.
For a moment there was silence. "Sweetie…" She heard her mother say. "Want to let me in?"
She didn't, but she also did. She didn't her mom to see her tears, but she also didn't want to be alone. She didn't want to risk her mother getting too cold given the amount of ice that was growing by the second, but her mom was probably the only one who could understand.
She took a deep breath and unlocked the door. Her mother walked in and sat down beside her and put her arms around Jackie.
"I'm sorry." Jackie whispered. "I'm sorry, I-I don't know why-"
"Shhh," Sophie said stroking her snow-white hair. "It's ok. We'll just stay here until your ready."
Mom never asked why she was upset, Why she was sitting on the bathroom floor with frost coating every inch of the bathroom. She didn't need to. She just held Jackie tightly occasionally kissing her forehead, as she waited for Jackie's tears to subside.
"You must be cold."
Sophie shrugged. "I like the cold," She said with a smile.
Jackie whipped the tears from her eyes. "I'm sorry I ruined your day."
"You didn't," Sophie said. "You're in pain, it was silly of me to think you would be over it in a few short weeks."
"Pitch didn't do anything," Jackie said. "He just sent nightmares… everyone gets nightmares."
"Pitch doesn't just send nightmares Sprite. It's fear itself he deals with. He can and will magnify the fear already within you. Nightmares were just his catalyst for doing so."
Jackie took a deep shuddering breath and stayed in her mother's embrace for a few more moments before she stood up. She looked at the frost-covered ground then up at the small window.
"You should go," Jackie said. "I should get rid of all this frost, snow and ice. I'll be out in a few."
Sophie smiled and stroked her hair for a final time. "Are you better?"
Jackie smiled and nodded. "I'm fine."
Sophie hugged her, "I'll see you outside."
"How is she?" Jack asked when Sophie left the bathroom.
Sophie leaned against the doorway and sighed. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I think I should have just insisted we stay in Burgess."
Jack looked in the direction of where the Bathroom was. "That bad?"
"She had a panic attack," Sophie said. "I don't think she's over the pain that Pitch put her through. A part of her still believes the things he said, even if she knows that she should know better."
"Maybe I should talk to her?"
Sophie closed her eyes. "She doesn't know you," Sophie said. "You're her father, but you've been away for such a long time. She might not talk to you."
"Shit" Jack Cursed. Sophie blinked at the use of the word. In all the years she'd known him he'd never once cursed in front of her.
"Sorry," Jack said running his fingers through his hair. "But how can I get close to her, if she won't even talk to me?"
"You have to give it time," Sophie said. "She's been through a lot, as have you, you both need to be patient with yourselves."
Jack turned away. "What are you going to do?"
"Half tempted to take her home," Sophie said. "Let her sleep for a few hours in her bed."
Jack nodded. "They'd be upset."
"Yeah, well they can just deal, had just one of them checked in at all-" Sophie blinked and shook her head. "This wouldn't have happened."
Jack said nothing.
"I don't blame you," Sophie said. "But the rest of them don't have your excuse."
"Excuse for what?" Bunny said hopping toward them followed by a jolly Nick St. North
"Don't worry about it," Sophie said forcing a smile on her face. "I'm thinking I might take her home soon. It's two AM over there right now, and she's going to need her rest for the
Christmas party tonight" Sophie said. Good thing I offered to host the thing tonight, so Jackie can have the choice to just hide in her room if it gets overwhelming.
"Of course of course," North said with a nod. "But surely she can stay long enough to open presents."
Sophie forced a smile. "Of course." She said.
"We're gonna go after you open presents," Sophie said. "Alright?"
Jackie seemed to relax at that even if she tried to downplay her desire to leave. "You don't have to do that."
"Jackie." Sophie started. "I'm hosting the Christmas party tonight. By the time we get home, it will be 3 AM, I would appreciate it if you got a bit more sleep before the party tonight and I'm gonna need it."
Jackie paused before she smiled. "OK," Jackie said.
After opening all the gifts that the Guardians had gotten her (Which included a small little fairy made of dream sand in an orb, toothbrushes, Chocolate bars, and a small little snowflake made of ice, that Jackie just knew was spelled to never melt.) Jackie was ready to go home.
She forced a smile and said goodbye to all the Guardians. Toothiana had hugged her, North had picked her up and spun her around, Bunny patted her head and warned her about spending too much time with Jack.
"Hey!" Jack said. "She can spend as much time with me as she wants!" He argued before Jackie could be overly offended by it.
"It was just a joke mate," Bunny said.
Jack rolled his eyes but gave a wink at his daughter.
Sandy stepped forward and hugged Jackie as well. Jackie started to yawn but fortunately Sandy stepped away before Jackie could pass out.
"Hey, mind if I come with you?" Jack said stepping forward his eyes trained on Jackie so she knew he was asking her specifically for permission.
Jackie stared up at his face and shrugged.
"I don't mind," Sophie said stepping forward giving Jack a one-armed side hug. "I know for a fact that Jamie has been meaning to talk to you for a while now."
Jack sighed. "Oh, that'll be a fun conversation I'm sure."
Sophie shrugged a twinkle in her eye. "You never know."
The party was in full swing downstairs, but Jackie was tired even after using some of Sandy's birthday gift to her earlier that morning to help her sleep, she hadn't been able to handle more than a few hours with her mother's side of the family.
It felt nicer to be with her mother's side of the family (not as good as being with the Jessups who were more like her than the guardians and her human family could ever be.) But there wasn't a lot of baggage in regards to her family, not like with guardians. She at least knew these people, and they (to an extent) knew her. There was no pretending that they'd been in each other's lives, no pretending that everything was fine when it clearly wasn't. Jackie may not have fit perfectly, but she knew her role.
She didn't have that with the Guardians. Maybe not ever.
She'd just walked past her mother's bedroom on her way to her room when she heard something interesting that caught her ear.
"I was so angry with you." Jackie heard Jamie say. "You left my sister to wake up alone and hadn't even had the decency to say goodbye."
"I know."
"I had my doubts about the relationship," Jamie said. "I knew it could end badly. I had hopedthat because you cared about her you would at least have the decency to not leave in the middle of the night."
There was a slight pause before Jamie continued.
"When you did not come back, I thought you were a coward that was too frightened to see their ex."
For a moment, all Jackie could hear was silence.
"I was wrong. I thought the worst of you when you had been kidnapped by Pitch."
"That's alright."
"It's not," Jamie said. "I was so angry at you I never once thought that something might be wrong. I was your friend- I should have known better."
"You didn't have any reason to think different," Jack said. "To be honest, Pitch didn't capture me until the day of Jackie's birth. I was putting off visiting burgess again, the day I decided to come back Pitch kidnapped me."
"But you did decide to come back," Jamie said. "And I should have known as your friend that you would never just leave Burgess. It's your home too."
Even Jamie had forgiven her father, and Uncle Jamie had been angrier at Jack than anyone. (Though to be fair, there wasn't anything to forgive, Pitch hadn't stayed away out of choice, but because he was kidnapped. She knew this, she knew this.)
"Uncle Jamie? Dad?" Jackie said stepping into her mother's room.
"Yes, snowflake?" Uncle Jamie said turning toward her.
"I'm gonna go to bed," Jackie said stepping forward. "So… goodnight."
Jamie smiled and walked forward and scooped his niece up in a bone-crushing hug. "Night little Snowflake." He said kissing his niece on the cheek.
When Jackie took a deep breath and turned to Jack walked toward him and hesitantly kissed him on the cheek.
"Night Dad." She said before she turned and walked out of the room and headed back into her room.
So she wasn't ready to incorporate all of the guardians into her life. But if Uncle Jamie could try to make amends with Jack maybe she could try .
A/N Can you tell which part of the story I had (mostly) written a year ago? Hope you enjoyed it!
Jackie will get better but as of right now she's mainly just confused. She gets better in the months to come (as MLWS II shows) but for the moment she's not ok. Though she is getting better.
