Chapter 35: Lingering
If along the highroad
I caught hold of your sleeve,
Do not hate me;
Old ways take time to overcome.
...
If along the highroad
I caught hold of your hand
Do not be angry with me;
Friendship takes time to overcome.
~Anonymous, Book of Songs 81, trans. Arthur Waley
S.W.O.R.D. had aquired a hotel in a town about ten miles west of Westview to provide lodging for the guards and scientists who worked at the Westview Containment Temporary Command Center. The hotel was nondescript, but the security was serious.
Vision walked in undisguised, hoping it was staffed by the same operatives who had been there when he came with Director Fury earlier.
No one raised an eyebrow when he identified Tommy and Billy as his sons. They were photographed, fingerprinted, and issued access badges before being allowed past the lobby.
At the door to Wanda's room, Vision raised his fist to knock on the door, but hesitated.
Tommy didn't. "Mom, you in there?"
Sam opened the door.
"Who are you?" Billy asked.
"Billy, Tommy, this is our old friend Sam Wilson," Vision explained. "Sam, our twins, Billy and Tommy."
"Nice to meet you," Sam said to them. "I can see the family resemblance. Speaking of which, I'll leave you to your reunion." He stepped out of the way.
Wanda was standing in the center of the room, staring at them like she couldn't believe what she was seeing.
"Mom!" Billy ran to her and almost knocked her over when he wrapped his arms around her.
Tommy smiled brightly at her. "Mom, I never knew you were such a badass. You fought a robot army, fought an alien warlord, and made your own personal dimension. That is seriously punk rock."
She laughed lightly, relief evident in the sound. She wrapped one arm around each of her sons. She kissed the top of Billy's head and leaned her head on Tommy's.
Sam smiled at the scene, clapped Vision on the shoulder, and took his leave.
"Mom, I want you to know I love you no matter what," Billy said.
"Thank you," she said. "It's so good to see you. I love you both so much."
"What's with the weird hat?" Tommy asked.
"It's blocking my brainwaves from reaching out to the Infinity Stones, and from influencing the way other people think," she answered reluctantly.
"I'm sorry to tell you this, but it makes you look like a dork," he joked.
She laughed. "I'll see if I can get an upgrade to a more fashionable model."
Vision stayed back, merely watching. Seeing Wanda's happiness at being reunited with the children she thought she'd lost warmed his heart, but the knowledge he was the one who took the risk that might have caused her to lose them chilled him to the bones.
Finally, Tommy said. "Well, Mom, it's been a long, weird day and I gotta get to bed. Can you believe they gave us our own hotel room? I've never stayed in a hotel before. Have you?"
"Yeah, a few," she laughed.
Billy gave her a parting hug. "We'll see you in the morning, Mom."
"Sleep well," she replied, barely concealing her sorrow at having to be away from them again.
They left. Billy closed the door behind him.
Leaving Vision and Wanda alone together.
They stood in silence, looking at each other.
Vision had no idea what he could say. He had literally and figuratively stabbed her in the back, risking the end of all she held most dear in the world.
"I understand if you can't forgive me," he finally brought himself to say. "If you hate me, if you wish to never see me again, I understand. I didn't know what else to do." His voice trembled and sputtered to a dry whisper as he tried to get the words out. "I just didn't know what else to do."
Wanda shook her head. "Vision, you're alive. Billy and Tommy are alive. That's all that matters to me. I don't care if they lock me up for the rest of my life."
"They will not!" he vowed. "I will not let them."
She looked startled at his outburst, and maybe a little hopeful. "You still care about me? After everything? After I lied to you?"
He'd believed she might hate him now, but the fact that she'd feared the same about him was worse. His heart feel like it was dangling over an abyss. He floated to her, unable to stand the distance a moment longer. "Wanda, of course I still care for you. Nothing could change that. You gave me your friendship, your companionship, your love, and two wonderful children. How could I not care about you?"
She looked down at their hands. He followed her eyes. Without realizing it, Vision had taken her hand. He wondered if he should let go, if holding her hand was too presumptuous. After all, even if she didn't hate him, she might still be angry with him after what he had done.
But she made no effort to pull away, and he couldn't bring himself to let go. His thumb brushed over her wedding ring.
"A good marriage needs trust and communication," Wanda said, "and I failed you in that. If you...don't want me anymore, I understand."
"My love for you has not changed," he assured her.
"How can you be so sure? It seems that my thoughts, my attitudes, and my wishes have been affecting the minds of the people around me. Maybe...it's possible when you thought you loved me, you were just reflecting what I feel for you, the whole time."
These words stunned him. She could believe it was possible that he never truly loved her? Such a belief revealed so much fear, guilt, and insecurity, a manifestation of the experiences in her life that had more than once taught her everything she relied on and believed in could be torn away in an instant. He felt helpless in the face of that much fear.
With the hand that wasn't holding hers, he reached up to the tight helmet fixed over her head. "This is preventing you from influencing the thoughts of others?"
"Yes," she answered. "I can't even read you right now."
"Then there is no way my thoughts are currently under the influence of yours. My mind is perfectly clear. And what my mind is telling me is that you are the love of my life."
He kept his eyes fixed on hers, willing her to accept the truth. When fresh tears rolled down her cheeks, he wiped them away.
"Is the helmet uncomfortable?" he asked. "It looks uncomfortable."
"It's okay," she said. "The chin strap's a little tight."
The chin strap was bolted on, making it impossible for her to remove or adjust it herself. Vision ran his fingers beneath it and, carefully so as not to hurt her, broke it. He placed his hands on the sides of the helmet and began to lift it off.
Wanda's hands shot up to grasp his, stopping him. "Don't. I can't risk it. I don't know how to control it."
He stared at her. He knew how frightening it was to have strength and powers you didn't understand, to fear what could happen if you lost control of them. Wanda was even more powerful, her abilities even more unpredictable. He wished he could help her. He wished he could make everything better for her.
Her eyes stayed fixed on him like he was an anchor in a storm. Her hands still covered his.
He kissed her, so abruptly he almost surprised himself. If she couldn't read him to feel from his mind how much he loved her, perhaps he could convey it through touch.
To his immeasurable relief, she kissed him back.
