Chapter 34 – You're The Pulse That I've Always Needed

Note: Chapter Title from Phillip Phillips' song 'Gone, Gone, Gone'

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any of its characters.

Now that that's out of the way, let's begin…

Last time,

"We said too many children have already grown up without parents. We can't help their parents, but we can help them. You can help them."

Peter nods too, then looks back to Mary and Moody, "All right, I'll do it."

And so, like a man walking to his own death, Peter Pettigrew returns to the Order of the Phoenix.

Now,

"Harry, what the hell is going on?!" Jamie demands when he meets her at her old house in France by floo.

Harry, despite his cousin's confused anger, remains calm, "Have you heard of Inimicus?"

"Of course, who hasn't?"

Harry can't help but feel a bit of pride hearing that. "I'm him."

Jamie blinks, "What?"

"He's me. I am Inimicus."

"…no, no that would mean you are trying to kill Professor Dumbledore…it would mean you killed my little broth-no-sister's best friend." Harry sighs, nodding. Jamie gasps, eyes filling with tears, "No…no. I won't help you with this! I won't keep your damned secret!"

"Then you will not know it. But given how many years ago you told me the truth of my family, that will be a lot of memory you lose. Your choice, of course," He replies coolly.

"You'd turn against your own cousin?"

"Are you not currently doing the same?" He asks, she blanches. Harry sighs at her, "Jamie –"

"You're bloody mental!" She exclaims.

"Perhaps, but I also have far more backing right now than Dumbledore does. So who would you prefer to have on your side?"

Jamie's eyes harden, "You're a coward. You have so much backing because you know you can't really take him on."

"This isn't about my pride or ego, Jamie. I don't need to be able to take him on, I just need him to be dead."

"And what will you do once he is?" She demands.

Harry gives a small, tired smile. "Live in peace."

For a moment, she believes him. But only for a moment, "You're insane," She says breathlessly. Jamie shakes her head as she steps away from him, "I've had enough of insane family members. So have it your way. I'll say nothing, but you leave me the fuck alone."

Harry studies her for a moment, gauging whether or not he can change her mind. Then he nods, "As you wish."

Jamie wastes no time before apparating away.


"Cockamaime?" A voice asks from the door. Jamie turns to see the Weasley twins at the door, she nods them inside.

Taking the hint of a serious conversation, Fred shuts the door behind them. "Tonks and Mad-Eye finished their sweep of the place. We're all just about ready to head to New HQ." Jamie nods again but says nothing more. "What's going on, Love?"

"I'm leaving. I've had enough of this war. My Dad was right, I had no idea what I was getting into. But now I know I don't want to find out," She tells them. They seem, understandably, quite shocked. "I know now that if they need me, I can be here just like everyone was when we sent out a call that they needed help. I don't have to be here and actively in the war to help them when they need it. So, I'm leaving," She says again, "Will you come with me?"

"Anywhere," Fred replies without hesitation. He walks over, taking her hand.

She nods, clearly relieved but no less tense, "And you?" She asks, turning to George.

George frowns, pain clear on his face as he shakes his head. "I'm sorry…I-I can't."

"George…" Fred begins.

He shakes his head, "I'm sorry, Freddie. You have to go and I know that. But know that I have to stay. We…" George sighs, "We knew we'd branch off eventually."

"I didn't think that meant now," Fred replies, tears in his eyes.

George nods, "Nor did I. But I have more stake in this war than you know. I've been helping someone…someone outside of the Order. Someone who I believe can bring peace."

"Inimicus," Jamie states as things fall into place. His disappearances in the last few months, his sudden interest in keeping in touch with those at Hogwarts, the constant secrecy.

George nods again, "I need to see this through." Fred and George share a moment before Fred nods, taking Jamie's hand. George gives his brother a tight smile.

"Be safe, George."

"Goodbye."


"How did it go?" Lillie asks Harry as he enters her room.

"She'll keep quiet but is refusing to help," He replies before taking in her nervous demeanour, "What's going on?"

"Your Father called me into his office while you were gone, Greyback was there," She begins to explain, Harry's eyes widening with fear and with interest. "They want me to join Greyback's pack, to learn about the pack before acting as liaison between the pack and your Father."

"That's…a big position for someone they've just met," Harry says in confusion.

"Exactly, there's a reason they want me to do this, I just can't work out what it is. Dollars to donuts it's about you, though."

Harry frowns as he thinks about it, "Influence," He realises, eyes lighting up, "You abandoned the Order, your family, everyone, to stay here with me with no hesitation or forethought. They know you are loyal to me. My Father thinks he can use the two of us to have more influence on the pack, Greyback thinks he can use my loyalty to you to have more influence on Voldemort, or at least be able to get away with more."

"So we're pawns," Lillie states.

Harry nods, "Yes, they just don't realise we're playing the game too," Harry replies with a smirk, "Afterall, while it may be difficult, a pawn can take a Queen too."

Lillie smirks too as she nods, "And checkmate a king."

"Exactly."


"Where's Jamie?" Sirius asks as everyone begins heading through the floo to The Fortress.

"She's coming back to Vienna with me," Phia tells him, walking down the stairs with Jamie and the Weasley Twins behind her. "So is Fred."

"What?" Benni and Molly ask simultaneously.

Fred and George go off to talk to their Mother while Jamie walks over to Benni. "That was really brave, earlier. Coming out to everyone," Jamie tells her sister as she kneels down in front of her, speaking French as they usually do when speaking to each other. Jamie smiles sadly, "I wish I was that brave."

"You are, you're the one who taught me to be," Benni replies, sounding more like a child than she has in a long time.

Jamie shakes her head, cupping Benni's cheek in one hand, "No, Little Benni, you worked that one out all on your own. See, the truth is, I was raised in fear. You learnt to battle through it, and I didn't. I don't want to live in fear anymore." Jamie takes a deep breath, taking both of Benni's hands in hers, "If you need me, I will be here. Immediately, no matter what. Just like always."

Benni nods before throwing her arms around her sister, "Je t'aime ma soeur."

"I love you too."

Jamie walks over to Sirius and hugs him, "Look after my Dad, will you?"

Sirius hugs her back tightly, "Always have, always will."

"I know. When he's feeling better I'll come talk to him about this but, honestly I sort of doubt he'll notice me not there right now."

Sirius nods, "Good point." Jamie pulls back, squeezing Blaise's shoulder and smiling at him before she, Phia, and Fred leave back to Vienna.


When at last the whole Order and kids arrive in the Fortress, the floo activates once more and Peter Pettigrew steps through.

"Right, shall we get this over with?" He asks, looking antsy about being surrounded by the Order of the Phoenix.

"Promise you won't run to Voldemort and tell him where we are?" Tonks challenges.

Peter smiles slightly, nodding. "I solemnly swear it."

Mary chuckles as she walks over and throws an arm around his shoulders, "Dork. How's Budgie and the Baby Bird?"

"Rema had an ear infection and we did not have any potion on hand, in our entire apothecary, to deal with it. So that was interesting to try and deal with while Bridget tried to whip one up." Peter sighs as Mary snickers and pats his back. "How's Moony doing?"

"He was shouting at Sirius last I saw, seems to think Sirius doesn't actually love him he hates him and that's why he's doing this." Mary winces, "It's not pretty."

"Poor Sirius," Peter says with a frown, Mary nods.

"And yet, from the ashes of heartbreak, I emerge." Mary, Tonks, and Peter look up to see Sirius standing on the first floor landing.

"Hi Sirius," Peter greets awkwardly.

Sirius' jaw tenses as he nods, "Peter."

"…how's Re doing?" Tonks asks into the awkward silence that follows.

"Regretting life, Molly's sitting with him for a bit while I get something to eat," Sirius replies, still looking at Peter unhappily.

Peter clears his throat, "Moody said you were the one who suggested using me as secret keeper."

"It made the most tactical sense," Sirius replies sharply. He moves down the stairs and towards the kitchen as he says, "Besides, you've got more to lose by betraying us this time. How's that kid of yours doing?" He leaves the room without waiting for a reply.

"You don't think he'll actually-" Tonks starts asking before Peter cuts in.

"If he did Remus would straight up leave him, so no, I don't think he will."

Dumbledore arrives a few minutes later, checks with the Order that they are sure about their choice, and then enacts the charm.

"You are our secret keeper now, Mr Pettigrew."

Peter nods, "I won't let you down again. Any of you."

"Hope not, because if you put my sister's life in jeopardy again, I will tear you limb from limb," Draco declares as he walks in the room through one door and out another, apparently just casually passing through.

Peter nods awkwardly, "Fairo."

"Actually, Professor we called you here for more than just this," Mary tells him, "We've got the Order together for a meeting, we need to talk."

Dumbledore frowns but nods, "Well then, shall we?"

"Dumbledore, Sir," George calls just before Dumbledore enters the dining room. Inimicus had spoken of a need to have someone else within the Order, this is an opportunity he can't pass up.

"What can I do for you, Mr Weasley?" Albus asks, surprised to have been stopped.

George isn't convinced his old Professor is sure which twin he is. He takes a deep breath, shyness creeping in once more without his Twin present to take over. But he made this decision, to be without him. He has to see it through. "I want to join the Order, Sir."

Dumbledore nods, unsurprised by that, at least. "Your brother and Miss Lupin are not with you?"

"No, Sir," George replies with a shake of his head and sadness in his eyes, "They've left, Sir. Jamie…she doesn't want anything to do with the war anymore. I think it's Harry that's done it, Sir. She doesn't want to lose anyone else and…she already sort of has. Fred won't leave her," George continues, unsurprised by the slight look of knowledge in Dumbledore's eyes when he gives away which twin he is though confusion about what Harry's got to do with anything. "They don't want a part in this and I can understand it. But I can't just stay out of it."

"Have you spoken with your parents about this?"

George shakes his head again, "No, Sir. But I am nineteen, it's my decision, not my Mum's."

Dumbledore nods slowly, "Very well. Welcome aboard, Mr Weasley," He says, holding out a hand that George takes and shakes.

"Thank you, Sir."


"Harry Potter has joined Lord Voldemort?" Dumbledore clarifies with shock after the whole situation is explained to him, the others all nod.

"He wasn't making a lot of sense…" George begins hesitantly, "It's like it wasn't him, like his whole personality, his morals, were…flipped or something."

All the Order Members from the First War look over as things click into place. Dumbledore seems mildly exasperated for a moment before feigning concern. George is fairly certain he's succeeded in making Dumbledore believe it is his spell that caused this.

"He cast the spell, the Moral Reversal Spell, you-know-who cast it on Harry. He had to have," Molly says, the others all nodding their agreement.

"Yes, it does appear so," Dumbledore states, going along with it. "Did we ever create a cure for that particular spell?"

Severus sighs, knowing he needs to speak with the Reapers higher up in the food chain than he is to find out what exactly is even happening anymore, "No, Sir, but we know it is possible. Bellatrix died defying Voldemort, which means somehow she was saved." Severus looks up and sees hopeful looks, he nods, "I'll redouble my efforts."

"See that you do."


What is it you wanted to tell us when you asked to meet up to begin with?

Harry asks Draco through the enchanted paper as he sits in his room. Draco in his with Blaise.

Blaise and Draco exchange looks before Draco replies.

We were searching that place that Pansy found out about. We found a dead body, looked pretty old, clear signs of torture. Thought maybe it was someone who fought against your Father in the last war. We got his wand, figured Ollivander might recognise it and we can work out who he was, which is all going to be easier to do quietly if the world isn't in shambles from the immediate effect of us outing Dumbledore's skeletons so to speak. And, I don't know. Something seemed off.

Send Ginny to Ollivander, she's non-descript and people tend to just believe what she says.

Understood.


Ginny takes the wand and heads to Diagon Alley, going directly to Ollivander's.

"Miss Weasley, nice to see you again," Ollivander greets as soon as she enters.

Ginny smiles, "Good Morning, Mr Ollivander. I was hoping you could help me with something," Ginny tells him.

"And what might that be?"

"I'm trying to identify the owner of this wand," Ginny replies, handing the wand over and hoping he doesn't notice the small drops of dried blood on the one end of it. She's pretty sure he does.

His eyes widen, "Are you in trouble, Miss Weasley?"

"Of course not, why would I be?" She asks, carefully controlling her expression to mask the interest and nervousness his words have invoked within her.

"Because this wand belonged to one Caradoc Dearborn."

"And who is he?"

"Dead, Miss Weasley," Ollivander replies simply. He sighs, "As I understand it, he fought alongside your Headmaster during the first war against he-who-must-not-be-named."

Ginny's eyes widen, "Oh."

"If you are involved in something, Miss Weasley, I strongly suggest you get out of it."

"I'm not. We're just trying to return the wand to the people who care about him, that's all."

"We?" Ollivander questions. Ginny curses herself internally, but Ollivander smiles. "I think you'll find that one Sturgis Podmore was his closest friend. Perhaps you should start there."

"Thank you for your help, Mr Ollivander."


The Reapers in the Fortress, including Severus and excluding Remus (for obvious reasons) succeed in secretly meeting in the attic. Harry at a payphone near Malfoy Manor on the line with Severus' mobile phone which is on speaker so that they can all actually talk for once.

"Caradoc Dearborn?" Harry asks Ginny after she fills him in.

"That's what he said. Apparently he was a member of-"

"The Order of the Phoenix, I know," Harry says to the surprise of all the Reapers.

"Is this one of those things we shouldn't ask about?" Ginny asks, unused to there being something she doesn't know.

Harry shakes his head though they can't see it, "Moody showed me a photo of the original Order and told me who everyone was, Dearborn was one of them."

"What do we do about the wand?" Ginny asks.

Harry frowns for a moment, "Is anyone of the Order not at the new HQ?" He asks, knowing he can't get there without Peter letting him and there's no way Peter's going to take any risks with this.

"Tonks, she's with her parents tonight," Severus replies, confused.

"Good. Now, as for the wand. George, apparate to the tunnel and hide the wand and my Inimicus suit under some rubbish or something, leave the rest of it to me."


That night, Harry wraps his invisibility cloak around himself and his broom as he flies first to the tunnel to grab the wand and then to Andromeda and Ted Tonks' house where he knows Tonks is staying the night. Once there, in full Inimicus regalia, he enters her room and leans against the inside of the closed door. Tonks walks out of her ensuite, toothbrush still in her mouth as she tries to untie her shoe. Really, someone as uncoordinated as Tonks is should probably have learnt not to do that by now, but that's none of his business. She freezes as she looks up and sees him.

"Who the hell are you?" Tonks asks around the toothbrush as she points her wand at him.

"Inimicus," Harry replies, using the voice disguiser that Blaise sewed into the mask for him.

"What do you want?" Tonks questions after taking the toothbrush out of her mouth.

"Only to give you this," He tells her, holding the wand out to her but sideways so that it is not pointed in her direction.

"Whose is it?" She asks, taking it hesitantly.

"An old member of the Order of the Phoenix. The first Order of the Phoenix."

"How do you know about the Order?" Tonks asks more aggressively than the previous questions.

"I know a lot of things, Auror Tonks. I am bringing this to you as a kindness, because I know how important closure can be. You can find his body at 5 Coleham Head, Shrewsbury."

"And now I suppose I am to just let you leave?" Tonks asks snarkily.

"You won't be able to stop me," Inimicus replies, "and I would very much prefer that you and I part on good terms. Don't you?"

Tonks frowns, then slowly lowers her wand. "Don't make me regret that, Inimicus."

"We all regret things in life, Auror. That does not mean they were the wrong decisions, only that they came with a heavy weight."

With that, Inimicus leaves.


"Remus!" Tonks calls happily as she enters the dining hall of the Fortress where the rest of the house's residents are currently eating.

"Hi, Tonks," Remus responds, sounding tired and looking pale and sickly, but okay. He's going to be okay.

"How're you feeling?"

"Like I got hit by a truck," Remus replies, "So better than I have in a few days."

"Right well I called the others here," Tonks says as she notices Dumbledore, Hagrid, McGonagall, and Kingsley arrive. "So kids leave, but Remus I think you should stay."

"I'm not a part of the Order anymore," Remus reminds her as the kids leave with suspiciously little argument. The others assume they are shaken from their capture and hope that this means they will argue less when the adults attempt to keep them out of war activities.

"You handled yourself pretty well on that rescue mission," Sturgis points out as he entered.

"No one handled themselves well on that rescue mission," Remus replies. Then he sighs, "I can't fight a war this way." Everyone nods, letting it go.

"This isn't about this war, it's about the last one. Inimicus paid me a visit last night," Tonks tells everyone. They all look at her in shock, Remus just as surprised. Not by the fact that he didn't know, he can't imagine why they would have told him yesterday all things considered. No, he's just surprised because he doesn't understand what could have made that risk necessary.

"What did he want?" McGonagall asks, raising an eyebrow as she and the others that just arrived take a seat. She's been keeping a close eye on the situation, still unsure how she feels about the whole situation but for now willing to go along with the agreement she and the students reached over the previous school holidays.

"He gave me this," Tonks explains, handing the wand to Dumbledore who honest to god gapes at it for a moment.

"Mr Dearborn's wand," He says quietly.

"What?!" Sturgis calls in surprise. Dumbledore hands the wand to him. "How did Inimicus get this?"

"I think he found it. He…" Tonks trails off for a moment, taking a deep breath in the face of the grief in the room, "He gave me a location, said we'd find the body there."

"This proves it, doesn't it? Voldemort and this, Inimicus character, they're connected," Sirius states but Tonks shakes her head.

"I'm not so sure about that. He said he was doing us a kindness, that he knew how important closure was."

"He tried ta kill Dumbledore," Hagrid reminds her.

"So has Remus, internally at the very least," Tonks rebuts. Remus rolls his eyes but denies nothing. "I just think there is more to this."

"It is curious, isn't it?" Kingsley tells them, "This was a risky move, motivated by emotion. This whole idea of closure…he wants us to find our friend because we deserve to." Kingsley shakes his head, "He cares about people, which makes his actions even more confusing. And yet, not. I don't think he has a big goal or over-arching plan," Kingsley explains, "I think he wants you to suffer, Albus."

"Why would he want that?" Dumbledore questions him.

"I don't know. But whatever reason he has, it's personal, and emotional. Inimicus feels you have wronged him in someway, I do believe he is trying to punish you for it." Silence follows his words, no one quite sure what to say.

"Let's just get Caradoc back, put him to rest properly. Then we'll deal with the rest of this," Severus suggests, the others agree.


Moody and Tonks go to Ollivander's that day, he seems unsurprised to see them.

"You ever seen this wand before?" Moody asks him, holding up Caradoc's.

"Yes of course. I remember every wand I've ever sold."

"Recently," Tonks adds.

Ollivander smiles slightly, "Someone came in with it, asking whose it was. They were trying to return it to its owner so of course I told them whose it was."

"Who came in?" Moody questions gruffly.

"A young girl."

"You ever seen her before?"

Ollivander shakes his head, "No, and she didn't offer her name."

"You didn't ask?" Tonks asks.

"I'm afraid not."

Tonks and Moody exchange looks, both agreeing that he knows exactly who came asking questions, before Moody huffs, "We'll be back if we have more questions."

"My door is always open," Ollivander replies cheerily.


"So, what did you guys want to talk to me about?" Jamie asks her Dads as they sit in a small sitting room in Phia's palace.

Severus looks at Remus nervously but Remus nods strongly despite still looking quite weak.

Remus clears his throat, "I want to talk to you about your Mother." Jamie's eyes widen but Remus shakes his head, "Not that Mother."

"What are you talking about?" Jamie asks him.

"Your middle name, Loraine. That was your birth Mother's name. She was a Death Eater and knew you would not be safe with her, growing up around Voldemort. It's not the life she wanted for you. So she started looking for me. I didn't know you existed at that point. You were nine months old when she finally found me. Told me I had a kid and that I had to look after you now. She strongly suggested we do a blood adoption with Bellatrix, Loraine thought it would be easier on you if you just never knew she existed."

Jamie's eyes widen once more, "You…I-what?" Jamie stands, pacing for a moment, "So you were just, what, never going to tell me?"

"No, no, of course not, Jaim," Severus tells her, "Your father and I made the decision a long time ago that when you turned 17 we'd tell you the truth but…well shit's sort of been non-stop insane since that happened so we hadn't. But we are now, obviously." Jamie calms down significantly at the knowledge that they had always planned to tell her and it was just delayed by war.

Remus clears his throat, "Losing your child, Jamie…it's hell. I don't know how she even dealt with it. But I wanted you to know how very much she loved you to do that for you."

"So how did Mum react when she came home and you just had a child?" Jamie asks, nervous as she always is to bring up her Mother to her Dad.

"…less shocked that I thought she'd be," Remus replies, "I mean she was speechless for a moment but after that, not so much."

"Well, if it was going to happen to anyone it would be you," Severus tells him. Remus looks at him in confusion and irritation. "Twice, Remus. Twice women have showed up on your door with months old children of yours that you didn't know existed."

"Shut up," Remus tells him, elbowing him slightly. Severus chuckles.

"Actually, erm, that was a pretty good lead in to something I wanted to ask you about when you were…well, feeling better, I guess," Jamie tells Remus who raises an eyebrow at her. "When you-know-who showed up, what you said, about him killing your kid. He called her Baby Ella. What were you both talking about?"

Remus freezes for a moment, then breathes more steadily than the other two were expecting. "Trixie was pregnant at one point during the first war. She named the child, Constellation Lucinda Lupin, but to be called Ella for short. She'd said in our first year at Hogwarts that if she had a kid she'd name them Constellation. Mostly because Sirius had just sworn no child of his would be named after a Constellation and she liked messing with him."

"And Lucinda because of Uncle Lu?" Jamie guesses.

Remus nods, "Lucius worked very hard to free your Mum from the spell her parents had her under for a few years, she felt she owed him a lot for that." Jamie nods, remembering her Father telling her of that spell the first time he ever talked to her about her mother.

"What happened to my Mother? Loraine, I mean."

"I really don't know. I never heard from her again," Remus tells her.

"I worked with her a few times as a Death Eater," Severus says, "She disappeared over a year ago."

"Do you think she's dead?" Jamie asks.

"I really don't know. She could be on an extended mission, she could be guarding something. I just don't know, and I can't exactly find out anymore." Jamie nods her understanding.

The two get up to leave, but when they go to Apparate away, Remus stops. "I have to go do something, I'll meet you back there, okay?" Severus looks quizzical but nods.


Remus apparates to his parents' place and walks in the door, walking into the living room. He goes to the mantle, picking up a picture of himself, Phia, their little brother, and their parents all sitting in front of a Christmas tree. He's got no idea who took the photo, but then he remembers very little of being four.

"Remus?"

Remus turns to see his Mother and smiles widely at her, "Hi Mum."

"What's wrong with you? Are you ill?" Hope asks, looking him over even as she comes over and hugs him.

Remus hugs her back, taking a deep breath and feeling safer than he has in a long time. "I'm not ill. I…well, turns out it's a little harder for an alcoholic to quit drinking than it sounds."

Hope looks at her son's face for a moment before she cups his cheek with a hand and smiles gently at him, "I'm proud of you, Remus."

"Thanks, Mum."

"So, shouldn't you be resting or something?"

"I had to go to Vienna, there was something Sev and I needed to tell Jamie, it went pretty well."

"That doesn't explain what you are doing here," Hope says, a suspicious look coming over her face.

Remus laughs a little self-deprecatingly as he nods but hesitates to speak. Then he hands her the photo he was holding and she looks at him in confusion. "What was his name?"

Understanding fills Hope's face along with old grief as she nods. "Ceri. His name was Ceri. He was a happy baby. You adored him, Phia always complained that he cried too much but still always wanted to play with him."

"Well that's just Phia in general, isn't it?" Hope laughs at Remus' words, nodding.

"Remus!" Remus looks over to see his Father entering the room, he goes over to hug him. "You all right, son? You look pale."

"I'm fine, Dad." He looks between the two nervously before he nods and gestures for his parents to sit on the couch as he sits on the coffee table in front of them. "There's some things I want you both to know, and you aren't going to like them."

His parents seem nervous but nod for him to continue. And then he tells them about Moony, about Werewolves in general, about their book and the research they conducted as a kid, about finding out Moony could talk and about the Marauders raising him and teaching him. He tells them about Moony hating Sirius, and his grief about losing his pack and his mate. And then he tells them about how Moony found out what a baby is and how he reacted when he realised what he had done during his first moon.

"This is…a lot, son," Lyall tells Remus who nods.

"I know, but I wanted you to know that he is sorry. He didn't mean to hurt Ceri, he just had no idea what anything around him was and he was scared, and he's been punishing himself ever since and he's just really damned sorry," Remus explains.

Lyall gets up, pacing. Hope takes Remus' hand, for comfort more than anything. "If we had known all of this years ago we could have helped you better," she says.

Remus nods, "That's why we wrote the book, so some people could live better lives than I did in that regard. And it worked, Petunia recommended it to the parents of a young Werewolf many years ago and she's been so much better off for it."

"And we're proud of you for that, never doubt that," Lyall tells him, but Remus can hear how unwilling he is to accept that Moony wanted to help too.

"None of it would have been possible if Moony hadn't worked with us to make it." Lyall nods but says nothing more about it. "Oh, also, about Benni," Remus says, partially to change the subject and also because Benni had requested he tell them about what Remus is internally referring to as 'the whole gender thing' that he is still trying to wrap his head around. "So I'm probably not going to be explaining this right…" Remus frowns, "Actually hold on."

He apparates back to the Fortress and almost immediately finds Ginny, "Hey, can you help me with something?"

"Yeah, of course, what's up?" Ginny asks him.

"You have to promise not to be weird about it."

"I make no such promises."

Remus rolls his eyes, "Look Benni asked me to tell hi-er-her grandparents about her being a girl and I don't know how to explain it."

"Glad to, will 100% do so, yes," Ginny replies quickly.

"Don't be weird with my parents."

"Now, Professor, when am I ever weird?"

Remus narrows his eyes at her before he sighs and nods, she grins as they go.

They find Remus' parents exactly where he left them. "Right, Mum, this is Ginny. Dad, you remember Ginny. Ginny, this is my mother, Hope Lupin."

"It's good to meet you, Mrs Lupin," Ginny tells her.

"And you, Ginny," Hope replies, hugging her, just because. Hope's a hugger, it's a thing.

"Right so, Professor Lupin has brought me here to explain something Little Benni wants you to know that Professor Lupin is pants at understanding let alone explaining," Ginny explains.

"I'm trying!" Remus defends.

Ginny nods, "And you have no idea how much that means to Benni, truly." Remus smiles slightly, glad that of all the ways he's failed his children, this so far has not been one of them.

"So, what's going on with my Grandson?" Lyall asks.

Ginny clears her throat, "So, a few days ago Benni told her parents that she would prefer everyone refer to her as a girl from now on because that is what she feels to be true." Hope and Lyall look at Ginny in confusion, she nods. "Yep, okay, so. There are people who are born biologically one gender, but their soul is another, and that's what has happened here. Biologically Benni, as you know, is male. However she is a girl, and would like to live as one now because, well, why would she want to live as something she isn't."

"But she-he…I mean Benni is a boy," Hope states, quite confused.

Lyall, however, looks thoughtful, "There's probably some way to use magic to change Benni's biological gender to fit the way he's feeling. Then he'd actually be a girl."

"Which is a wonderful sentiment except for one thing," Ginny replies, "Some muggles feel this way too, and they can't use magic to do that. But they still are the gender they identify with, even without the ability to change their biological gender."

Hope frowns, nodding slowly. "Well, we have some of Jamie's old dresses, I think, if Benni wants them."

"Yes, and a couple of her old Hogwarts uniforms. It's only the tie and coat that actually shows a house so they should work too," Lyall adds.

"I'm sure Benni would appreciate that a lot," Ginny says with a big smile.


NOTE:

Harry's got a plan, okay, I swear.

Y'all have no idea how much of a relief it is to not have to misgender my own character anymore. Literally the amount of pronouns I had to change because it said 'she' when Benni hadn't even realised this yet was a whole situation.

And I've been thinking about it, I'm actually not convinced a pawn can checkmate a king, because like it has to be right diagonally next to something to take it but if it's that close then the king can take it…I'm not good at chess, is my point, so apologies if Lillie and Harry's analogy there made no sense.

Also, I was reading back over a part of The Boy Who Never Cried Wolf while writing this and read through the group's first interaction with Eleenie. I didn't notice at the time but without what was going on in my head at the time, Eleenie's comment about hearing Sirius was attractive came out…well, a little creepy from a Professor to her teenaged student. So I just wanted to explain that when everyone tensed up worried what she would say when she said he wasn't what she expected, she noticed it. So she made a joke in an attempt to lighten the mood and went with a joke she'd usually say without thinking for a moment about the fact that it wasn't really appropriate in these circumstances but it's too late at that point so she just moves on. Anyway, she wasn't creepily flirting with him, is what I wanted to say, she was actually trying to make him more comfortable by reassuring him she wasn't just expecting him to be like any other Black and didn't think it through.

Apologies to anyone that moment weirded out because literally none of the above sentiment came through in the chapter.