AN: Gorgeous Goats Creamery is a real company, I just borrowed the name for a small part of this story.
Chapter 9
"In my experience, there is no past, there is no future. Everything simply is."
Sadhguru
I try to ignore my best friend's questioning and all too observant eyes as I allow Paul to lead me over to the mudroom. Finding my old work clothes exactly where he said they'd be, I dress quickly, keeping my memories and thoughts of my mother at bay. Stepping out of the door connected to the mudroom, I feel each of my senses come to life as a ray of sunlight dances across my face, and the noises and smells of a busy farm take me back to my childhood. Closing my eyes, I take a moment to analyze my emotions as waves of memories of working on the farm run through my mind. Inhaling sharply, I realize that I don't have a single bad memory connected to the farm itself. Working in the barns or on the fields had always given me a purpose, a sanctuary from anything and everything that worried me. Feeling my shoulders drop with relief, I allow a small spark of excitement to grow inside of me.
Opening my eyes, I see that Paul is studying me carefully, clearly waiting to see how I'll react. The pleased smile that slowly spreads across his face, gives me the confirmation I need and with it I find both purpose and relief. Without even thinking about my actions, I find his hand with mine, locking us together.
"Okay, I've seen enough, hold up!" Jake's loud voice breaks through our little bubble, grabbing our attention.
Glancing over at my old friend, I see his confusion as he glares suspiciously at our joined hands.
"When did this happen?"
Paul and I share a look, but neither of us reply which only appears to annoy Jake even further. The man who is clearly still the closest thing I have to a big brother huffs in aggravation, placing both hands at his hips before locking eyes with mine.
"Leah?"
Shooting a glance at Paul, I realize that he's fighting back a smile.
"Paul and I met at a bar recently. We… uhm," I stop, unsure of how to best describe our current relationship. Luckily, Paul jumps in and fills the gap.
"We're dating, Jake," he explains simply.
It's clear that my friend isn't satisfied with his answer.
"Looks like you're doing quite a little bit more than dating."
Something in Jake's almost accusing tone appears to hit a nerve within Paul, because he immediately takes a threatening step towards him. Both men equal in both strength and size.
"What Leah and I do is our business, Jake, and ours alone. If you have a problem with that you are welcome to leave."
The men lock eyes and for a brief moment I wonder if Jake's meddling, big-brother instincts will lure him into turning this already heated exchange into a raging, fist-punching brawl. Instead, Jake narrows his eyes, tilting his chin up as he boldly continues to question Paul about his intentions.
"And it has nothing to do with the fact that she's part owner of this place?"
My heart skips a beat at his direct question.
The fury and outrage on Paul's face is undeniable, however, I'm pleased to see that he's able to keep himself in check.
"Of course not!" Paul exclaims, taking several deep breaths to calm himself before addressing Jake again.
"You know that I'd never do something like that."
"Yeah, I do," he pauses, "but she doesn't."
Jake's response causes my breath to hitch and after studying Paul's shocked expression, I can see that he's managed to knock the breath out of him as well.
Jacob's lips curl into a roguish half-smile.
"Just making sure that your heart's in the right place, brother, and that she knows it, too."
He jabs a playful punch into Paul's shoulder.
"Hurt her, though and I'll have to kill you," Jake warns, pushing a pointed finger harshly into his opponents chest.
In the next second, he has wrapped a heavy arm over my shoulder and is dragging me with him towards the barn.
"Now, allow me to be the first one to tell you about all the changes Romeo over there has made to turn this place around."
Paul follows behind us, shaking his head at Jake's unusual, but highly effective antics.
§§§
Walking the grounds, I can't help but feel overwhelmed by both the familiarity, but also the unfamiliarity of the extreme changes that have been made over the years to my family's beloved farm. Having done a lot of research on the market, Paul managed to convince my father to replace some of his corn-fields with soy-beans. The production and range of new opportunities had really given the farm a facelift and new purpose. This is now the main source of income. My mother's goats, which had long been a passion of hers, ranked as a high second.
Seeing the goats again, peacefully grazing in the wide, green pastures, immediately awakens a rush of happiness from me, unlike anything I've felt in a very long time. Before I know what I'm doing, I've jumped the fence and am walking out to greet them with a wide smile on my face. Losing track of time completely, I spend my time enjoying their presence, feeling a connection to my mother that I realize that I've sorely missed. When I finally turn back, I see that Paul's waiting patiently by the entrance.
"Have fun?" he asks, opening the gate for me.
I respond with a small smile.
Chuckling merrily, he wraps his arms around me and pulls me close, kissing my temple. I've already realized that Paul is an extremely affectionate person, and he really doesn't seem to care that things are evolving very quickly between us. Usually, this level of affection would bother me, but for some strange reason it doesn't. In fact, curled against the heat of his body, I can't help but feel completely at ease. The usual stress and fear I feel when I'm dating someone is strangely nonexistent.
"Bella's here with some lunch," he announces, my eyes lifting to his in surprise.
"I thought you had a refrigerator full of food from Mrs. Elizabeth?"
His grin widens and he tenderly tucks a few locks of hair behind my ear as he explains.
"Once a month, your father would order a big lunch from Bella for all the men and women that help out here. I'm only continuing that tradition. They usually set up right outside the main barn."
This is perhaps the biggest change I've found while walking around the farm's grounds. There's an incredible sense of unity between every single one of the workers that I never experienced while growing up here.
"My Dad-?" I begin, but am unable to find the words to continue.
"Your Dad really did change, Leah," Paul pauses, making sure that I'm ready to listen before he continues.
"He stopped drinking and put all of his energy into making this place successful; for you."
Doubt flares up inside of me and I'm about to speak out against him when he beats me to it.
"I know that's probably difficult for you to believe, but it's the truth and I'm going to do my best to prove it to you."
Staring into his genuine, dark brown eyes, I feel his fierce determination and decide it would be pointless to argue. Lowering my gaze to his chest, I give in when he once again pulls me close. Hugging me tightly, we look out upon the vast and rich land of my family's beautiful farm.
§§§
We've only just turned the corner around the barn, when I'm almost violently dragged away from Paul by a whirlwind of pink and cream. Dragged back behind the barn, I'm pushed against the wall by a surprisingly strong Bella dressed once again to perfection. The bow in her hair and the dressy, pink crop top and flaring oversized shorts are the perfect outfit for the warm day and I immediately feel a little embarrassed by my dirty overalls and work boots. Bella, however, doesn't seem to care. Her bright eyes busy as they pierce me with a death glare.
"Do you have any idea how worried I was about you?!" she yells.
"I had Charlie and the entire Forks Police Force patrolling the streets searching for you all night and all because you didn't have the decency of leaving me with a way of contacting you before you just took off!"
My mouth opens to respond, but she silences me with a wave of her hand.
"Where's your phone?"
I feel my mouth open and close like a goldfish, shocked speechless by her strong reaction.
"Give me your phone!" she orders sharply and I quickly comply.
Mumbling under her breath, she effectively calls her own phone before typing and saving what must be her contact details into mine.
"There. Don't you ever do that to me again!"
Her fiery eyes flash back to mine.
Lifting my palms in front of me in surrender, I finally find my voice again.
"I swear!"
Bella's nostril's flare as she huffs out in frustration, but I can see that her anger is quickly dissolving. Before I can stop it, I'm overcome by a sudden fit of giggles, which Bella soon joins, the two of us resembling a pair of teenagers. After a while, we're both holding our stomachs, trying desperately to stop.
Reaching for her hand, I gently squeeze it.
"I'm sorry," I tell her, genuinely.
She purses her lips and waves me off as though she's already over it, all the while keeping her hand locked with mine. Pulling me from the wall, we slowly begin to walk back to where the lunch is currently being held.
"Paul, huh?" she asks me, with a wink and a wicked smirk.
Immediately I feel my cheeks flare with heat, but I do my best to push back my embarrassment.
"Yeah," I answer simply, to which Bella's bright eyes twinkle happily.
"I'm glad."
And with my new friend's state of approval, I don't even hesitate when the man in question calls me over, having reserved a seat next to him at the large picnic table.
§§§
Lunch is a pleasant affair and I find myself drawn into an enthusiastic conversation with Seth, a 21 year old farmhand, who has some wonderful ideas about different products we can create using goat's milk. Bella soon joins in, her professional expertise and personal experience from working and living in France, fueling our ideas even further. My mother had started producing handmade soap out of goat's milk, which now had expanded to lotions. Seth wanted to expand, arguing that the interest for goat's milk as an alternative to dairy was on the rise and Bella couldn't agree more. Although the taste was a little stronger, it really was a great alternative on its own. There were also a large range of products that we could easily make and sell at all the different Farmer's Markets with very little effort on our part.
As lunch comes to an end, our ideas have grown and, with a gentle push from Paul, we head up to the house, where I grab my computer and sketch pad, putting my marketing degree to good use. By nightfall, we've come up with a series of products and recipes we want to try, a marketing plan and a brand new logo. Working on this project had ignited something in me that I hadn't felt for a long time; enthusiasm and passion for a product. Thinking back on the career I'd built in Seattle, I realized that over time I'd become complacent… I was good at what I did, yes, but I'd lost that spark I used to have and after the news of my parents' death, it had been blown out completely.
Walking Bella and Seth out the door, I'm surprised to see how dark it is. Paul is still nowhere to be seen, however, I get the feeling that he'll probably come walking through the doors any minute. Deciding to get dinner going, I rush to the kitchen and get a good look in the refrigerator and pantry before I get to work. I'm frying up the last piece of breaded trout, when I hear the tell-tale thumps of someone stepping into the mudroom. Throwing the fish in the oven for a little while to finish, I check on the potatoes and vegetables. Briefly forgetting about Paul, I actually startle when his strong arms curl around my waist, pulling me against his front as he drops a kiss to my neck.
"Now this I can get used to," he whispers, his lips brushing against my skin, sending a flush of goosebumps through me.
Sighing, I allow myself a moment to melt against him and enjoy his proximity. It blows my mind how intimate and natural being with him feels, but yet again I try to push my doubts away and simply accept it.
"I didn't know if anyone would be joining you," I tell him breathlessly, feeling the heat of his tongue join his lips as he trails up my neck.
"Mmm," he hums, one hand moving determinedly to cup my breast.
"Yeah, well, I decided I was done sharing you," he reveals in my ear, his voice husky and incredibly sexy.
Moaning, I spin in his arms and tug his lips straight to mine, passion detonating between us like a fucking explosion. Unfortunately, we aren't able to get very far, because in the next minute or so the alarm on the stove goes off, alerting us that the food is done. Paul's frustrated groan makes me laugh, cooling some of the seemingly uncontrollable lust I feel for him. Pulling out the fish from the oven, I ask him to set the kitchen table as I carry the food over. Together we get everything ready. We're just about to sit down when I remember the pitcher of water I have cooling in the refrigerator and quickly return to fetch it. When I come back, I find Paul studying my sketches, his expression full of appreciation and pride.
"Gorgeous Goats Creamery, huh?"
A wave of nerves surge up inside of me and I realize that his opinion on this means more to me than any others.
"Yeah," I pour us both a glass of water.
"Do you like it?"
Paul's eyes shoot to mine and for some reason, I get the impression that he can actually sense how nervous I am. In the next second, I release a small shout when I'm suddenly draped across his lap, his hands cupping my cheeks as his pitch black eyes burn into mine.
"I fucking love it," he tells me arduously.
Ducking my head bashfully, he quickly forces my eyes back to his.
"I'm serious Leah, your work is excellent."
"So, you don't mind us trying to expand the Goat products?"
He releases a sharp laugh.
"Not at all!"
His expression goes soft.
"Leah, you have just as much a right as anyone to explore our options. More, in fact, seeing as you're the owner."
"Part-owner," I whisper.
"Well personally, I think I like the term partner."
The way he looks at me makes me feel as though I'm something incredibly precious to him… important.
"Doesn't this scare you at all?" I ask, wondering how he's able to be so confident and sure about the two of us all the time.
Paul sighs, running his hand up and down my back in a soothing manner.
"No," he pauses. "Because you and me… this farm… it's fate."
