Carly almost had the conversation that very evening. It was already 9 pm, and yet she couldn't sleep.

-Can I watch something?- Lapis had smiled at her; in spite of himself, he was too excited for that useless stupid swamps challenge. He didn't even need to sleep often, then if he was also thrilled it wasn't worth it, fair and square.

Carly had watched a bit of the movie with him, -Honey, what's the right time to do something important you're not sure about?-

What a strange question. Seventeen had been in a similar situation before when he forced himself to spill the beans and fill Carly's three-year gap.

-...Suck it up and do it.-

Early in the morning, Carly had watched him take off from the balcony of their house; he didn't need John's helicopter.

Lapis would be in the swamps for a week, when he got back she would have to talk to him. She didn't know how, but she had to say something. It was almost time.

Trying to fill her head withsomething else, Carly felt dismayed that the group home would be gone soon, without her being able to say goodbye to Robbie, or even Anna. Carly didn't mind doing anything to stay safe from the disease, but she was worried about Robbie.

She would be updated daily by Anna.

With the will to take care of herself, however, she wanted to get rid of the worm of doubt: only a serological test would tell her if she was incubating chickenpox or less.

That same morning, Lillian drove her to the hospital.

-They will look for antibodies to chickenpox. I hope I don't have any…-

Sitting next to her in the waiting room, Lillian felt Carly shiver imperceptibly.

-You'll put your heart at peace. You'll be fine.-

Later, while Carly sighed at certain questions from the questionnaire that the nurse handed her, the doctor approached Lillian, -Does she always look that white?-

-Well, she's a natural redhead…-

The doctor scratched his goatee and turned to the nurse, -Have her iron levels checked too.-

Lillian felt triggered: was Carly unwell?

-Are you two sisters?- the doctor inquired.

"Yes" was the park ranger's instinctive thought. -No, just friends.-

/

In the Southeast it was already midsummer.

Roshi had taken his granddaughter to the nearby Southern Archipelago National Park, Oolong and Turtle had gone with him; Yamcha and Chiaotzu had stayed on to train with Tien, who had decided to pay a visit.

Krillin and his wife were alone; they knew well that intimate moment would be elusive, like every other there at home.

For Eighteen the pleasure was even more intense when they did it like that, with her face pressed against the sheets and Krillin's whole body resting on her buttocks.

The cyborg girl panted behind the gag she had fashioned, with the lingerie she had stripped off herself; the human kept her arms tied behind her back, hit her buttocks with his pelvis and with his hands; Eighteen's skin was so pale that those smacks left the faintest idea of red mark; every so Eighteen turned back to look at her man's stripped body, excited at the sight of his sculpted and sweaty abs.

When they did it that way, Krillin would give in quickly; Eighteen soon felt him throb as he reached his release.

Eighteen had torn the lace of her thong with her teeth; without speaking she lay on her back, folding her legs and letting him see everything.

Her flesh was inviting, red and moist like rose petals in the morning...but not a minute had passed.

-Let me take a breath, Wonder. I'm no longer a young man.-

Krillin speculated that he could recharge immediately, if he was like her.

-Imagine that: again and again, gush after gush, boom boom.-

-Do you really have to express yourself this way, Kril?-

From his smile, Eighteen realised how much the thought of multiple and close orgasms excited him.

-Do you think it would be possible?-

-I don't think you'd need to be like me.-

And in any case she didn't have a member; it was an awkward conversation, and Eighteen herself did not understand why she found it so.

Eighteen had been afraid that Krillin would no longer want to do it like that with her after she had Marron.

Sara had confessed that Bruno, even though he was always in love with her, could not let himself go to certain intimacies with the mother of his daughter.

"He is convinced that he would disrespect me, sully me. What can I do, Lazuli, force him? " she sighed, "no. But I miss certain moments, doing it dirty. "

Bruno cared about purity; he was not one of those who imposed his vision of things on his wife, however he had never grown fond of Sara's tattoos, he found they ruined her femininity, he preferred her in white lingerie. Eighteen remembered; she knew it was her ethereal colours that had physically attracted Bruno when they were only fourteen and twenty.

Bruno was a golden man, but Eighteen winked mischievously at hers, -I love that you always want to do it dirty with me.-

-What choice do you give me?-

The room rang only from the fan spinning and the couple kissing.

Eighteen stepped away from Krillin, pulling on his shirt. When she did that she never got the sexy girl-next-door movie look, because Krillin's shirts fit her well.

-I give you choice over everything, except for one thing: keep on wrapping it and we'll all be merry.-

Eighteen did not feel serene in saying those words: they were out of place, what did they have to do with that little moment of cuddles?

-And why shouldn't I?- Krillin watched her walk towards the mini fridge they kept in the room, looking for a sip of fresh water. -Is that about the argument we had the other day?-

Eighteen nodded.

Krillin wanted another child. And not just him, the whole Kame House seemed to want to pressure her to push out another baby.

"What about a little brother?"

"Will you leave her an only child?"

"Why don't you have another one? In the end you can't get pregnant?"

"Is it because you are a cyborg?"

Marron wasn't even a year old.

-Aren't you happy with me and Marron?-

Krillin's large eyes widened, focusing on the outlines of Eighteen, half naked in the half-light.

-Eighteen… you girls are my whole life. But there is always room for even more love in my heart.-

His was such an immense heart: the more love he gave, the more he produced.

Oh, Krillin...

Eighteen couldn't help but feel disappointed in herself. Yet he knew it was wrong, even harmful, to sacrifice herself just to please him. Her own happiness and serenity mattered as much as Krillin's: if Eighteen didn't take care of herself, who should have?

Krillin cared for her with extraordinary love, he had always done everything to make her life easy.

He was the kind of husband who, when she was pregnant and her back hurt so bad that she couldn't roll over on her side, turned her over and cuddled her with pillows and strokes, calmed her down.

Nevertheless, the first one who had to love herself more than anyone, better than anyone else was herself, Eighteen.

-I don't want to, Kril.-

Was it so wrong not to see herself having more children? She had had a child, her mother two, some women didn't want any and others dreamed of large families. Was there a right or wrong way a woman could feel about motherhood?

Maybe she was a cyborg and didn't understand; it must be her problem, in the end she was the weird one, other women almost always wanted more children.

Marron was worth it, Eighteen wouldn't have given up on her daughter even if she had known that she would suffer to have her.

What Eighteen couldn't do was going through pregnancy again: she had bled, wept, lost hopes, dragged herself along for eternal days of nausea, ruminating like a cow, forced by her own body to constantly gorge itself.

Of course, if she wanted to feel better about it she could always talk to Kate, but by now Eighteen knew that pregnancy was not a bad experience for everyone.

When Roshi returned and Krillin went to meet him, Eighteen stayed alone with her cell phone; she came across a thread on in which many users complained about missing the bump, having had beautiful hair, about how "the typical symptoms were a myth to debunk" since they had had no nausea, no swelling. Eighteen often happened to read about that kind of experience.

An unknown end of the spectrum.

"Well, lucky you! Those bitches."

Perhaps karma repaired those breeders only useful for getting knocked-up with long and painful labours.

But karma did not exist: Eighteen closed the web page, not without secret jealousy.

/

By the dawn of June the last batch had managed to land in the swamps. The test for the last four shouldn't have happened that late, but all the rangers had been busy and John had pushed it further down the calendar.

Églantine had tackled the five swamps at the gates of summer only once, fifteen years ago, and was not impatient: it was better to do it in the winter, with the heat the marshes reeked, grew foggy, filled with insects.

-It couldn't be worse than this!- the woman sighed, gripping her shotgun and kicking the mud.

-How boring,- the top ranger complained emphatically, staring down at his own legs and those of his colleague, thigh-deep into a slobbery, foamy, acid vomit-coloured mucilage.

-I didn't deserve it, Seventeen. But you did.-

Églantine alluded to the meeting in February; John had done it on purpose with him.

-And I don't regret that.-

"Attaboy..."

Églantine had never worked with Seventeen, she had just interacted with him a couple of times. He had a reputation for being arrogant, unorthodox, Églantine hadn't been impatient to be in a group with him.

But perhaps she had better stay with him, since that year she was really listless and her knee ached more than usual.

-Well, I'm going. See you,- she announced, wading through the mud.

-Wait up!-

Seventeen knew he would be bored to death, so he was going to have a little more fun. Églantine watched him undo the light wool scarf from his neck and fold it into a long strip. Seventeen leaned down with his back to her, -Wanna help?-

He wanted her to blindfold him.

-Ok...Why?-

The ranger woman made a knot with the scarf, careful not to pull his hair.

-Because now I can't see. So I will be less bored.-

He always had the other senses, it was useless to go out of his way to reason with Églantine.

Seventeen immediately came into contact with the environment: he listened to the different sounds created by various plants and various depths of water, he used his skin to feel vibrations and tasted a sample of air with the tip of his tongue.

-What are you, a reptile?- Églantine laughed to see him.

-There's a grove over there,- he nodded behind him. -It will be less hazy.-

Églantine was almost certain she remembered a grove was there.

"Crazy."

Seventeen had no intention of spending the week with Églantine, or with that big comedy rucksack on his shoulder: he started rummaging in it and handing his ropes to his colleague.

-I don't need anything, you can take these.-

Then he gave her his tent and sleeping bag, -And these.-

He made a stack in Églantine's arms when he placed the saucepan, noodles and lighters on top, -And these. If you feel heavy, pass the gun.-

-Of course.-

Églantine knew that if he wanted to, he would take it.

Seventeen had kept his water bottle and first aid kit, strapped to his belt. He was finally ready to go.

-Seventeen? Can I come along?-

The five swamps were an excuse to be on his own for a while, but there was the danger of boredom...he could always ditch Églantine if she bothered him.

He shrugged, nodding "ok" with his blindfolded face.

/

Sleeping on the marshy ground would be uncomfortable and unhealthy. The large low branches of the grove were a better option.

Night had fallen and Seventeen was still blindfolded: lying on his back, he tossed pebbles into a hollow of the tree where he and his colleague were stationed. He always hit the mark.

Églantine went through all the essential items he had dumped on her, -Don't you need your torch?-

-Eh? No, I have night vision.-

-You're funny.-

Seventeen took off his blindfold and picked up a torch. He turned it on, mimicking the hum of a lightsaber.

-I'm one with the Force, the Force is with me- he declared to the tree, in a menacing voice, zigzagging the beam of light.

From the sleeping bag, Églantine smiled. The boy had to have his fun; even though he was the top ranger and carried out grown-up stuff (and as grown-up) in her eyes Seventeen was virtually a child.

/

Louisa Dubochet had long ago warned Carly that two cows of Michel Crozier's, owner of the pasture located between Viey and the Pessy plain, would soon calve.

One morning, still early for her, Carly woke up to the insistent vibrating of her cell phone: Louisa wanted her up to the cowshed to show some new interns how a twin birth in the Grey Fleece happens. It was something unusual in that breed of cows.

Carly didn't really feel like, but it was an opportunity a superior was giving her to show everyone how good she was: she couldn't say no.

She hastily brushed her hair and teeth, put on some shorts and rolled at the wrists the long and wide shirt (it was Lapis's) she had slept in.

Carly put on a white coat and picked up another in a bag, along with the tools of the trade; for breakfast she allowed herself a drop of water from a fountain, hurrying to her car.

/

Leni stood in line at Mrs. Crozier's little shop, buying fresh cream to eat with wild strawberries.

The wails of calving cows rang from the sheds not far from the shop; Carly arrived there after a slow drive, her eyes still clouded with sleep. She waved at Leni before Louisa intercepted her.

-Little Bo Peep, are you finally awake?-

Louisa looked eloquently at her watch; was it 10.30, what was her beloved vet doing still in bed at 10.30?

-Come on, come on!- Louisa threw her in the cowshed, in front of a handful of unpaid interns. -Guys, this is Der Veer, she worked for me for free. And she's doing it even now!-

"This is abuse of power."

Carly would have retorted if she had had energy to waste; but that morning she had woken up on the wrong side of the bed, her stomach empty and her head dizzy.

Mr. Crozier stood a moment to guard the zoologist and her interns, while they watched a cow go in circles, perhaps to find comfort from contractions.

Louisa turned to Carly, -Der Veer here is obsessed with birds, but she's an artist with births: she pulls out calves like she'd shell hazelnuts. When she was a volunteer like you all, that was her daily bread.-

Carly was tempted to ditch the zoologist, -It's not obsession, Louisa. It was my specialization.-

Since her first internship births had been satisfaction for Carly, but it was also challenging; it was not easy to live with those that ended badly, even if it was part of the trade and of life, however unpleasant.

When lambs and calves died in her hands Carly cried, home alone.

Once she had shocked some interns while, with her heart in turmoil but her hands and mind cool, she had skinned a lamb that had not survived birth, to use its fleece. It was done to comfort the ewe, she had to explain.

/

Normally, when John brought up the challenge of the five swamps, no one else but ranger groups went there.

Seventeen, always followed by Églantine, knew for sure that the trail he sniffed did not belong to the other two colleagues in the batch.

-What is it now?- Églantine exhaled wearily as she watched the blindfolded top ranger wrinkle his nose and cross his arms.

Seventeen had promised her he would lead her to a stream of clean water, to gill their empty bottles; but by now she was no longer sure he'd stick to the plan.

-If you're thirsty you can boil the mucilage,- he cut it short, in fact. -Me, I think I'm busy.-

-Eat the mushillage yourself, Seventeen.-

-Mucilage.-

-What did I say?-

- 'Mushillage'.-

Églantine still complained, yelled for him to wait for her but Seventeen had scooted forward, still seeking the source of the scent.

/

The furtive figure squatting in the cattails, in those swamps known to be deserted, let out a little cry when she found herself the victim of an ambush. With that cry she revealed to "the attacker" that she was female.

-What is a civilian like you doing here?-

The boy had a blindfold over his face and the employee had seen him only once, but his features were easy to remember. Those, and more.

-You here, you racist?-

Out of all rangers, she had to stumble over that one. That was some bad luck.

-Ohhh. In fact,- the boy cleared his throat, his voice became sharp. -What's uncivilised scum like you doing here?-

-You don't even know who I am. You can't see me.-

-Don't need to.-

The prowler didn't take him seriously. She walked away as if nothing had happened, but soon she fell face-down into the mud: out of nowhere, the swampy waters had stirred and a small wave had submerged her.

Seventeen listened with pleasure to the various insults the woman covered him with, but he was not satisfied: really wanting to enjoy the her face, he took off the blindfold and in a leap he was a few centimetres from her. He stole her jacket and sweater, loaded with rotten water, and she watched him tear them into long regular-shaped strips, mummy bandages, at impossible speed.

Yeah, that ranger could fly, what was there to argue?

Seventeen figured why that delinquent was there.

-You and your shit company have to stop,- he asserted absently, intent on tying the various strips together.

-Or else?- she challenged him.

-Or else, I'll hunt you down.-

-You won't find me.-

-I will always find you.-

This time, she believed him. She knew innately that he must have memorised her scent and the timbre of her voice, her step as she walked.

And knowing to be at the mercy of someone like that Seven-something guy, she couldn't rebel: she let herself be passively enveloped in a kind of chrysalis made of her own clothes. She began to complain when she was carried up to a tree and tied upside down.

-This is mistreatment! It's unethical!-

-So is what you do ethical? Don't make me laugh,- the ranger snorted.

The criminal answered with a bark, blood rose to her head and a vein swelled on her forehead.

-Are you seriously not afraid of legal consequences, stupid brat?-

-Me? Nah…-

Meanwhile Églantine panted, and pushed aside the cattails, dismayed to see the top ranger pacing around someone tied up, vulture-like.

-Didn't you want water?-

Seventeen reached into the woman's bag and threw a full water bottle to his colleague. He gave her a summary of the Solway Solvents situation and once prevented Églantine found herself appreciating his devilish smile.

The woman, hanging like a sausage in the heat of June, was starting to feel faint, -Give me water!-

-You sure?-

Seeing how he had tied her up, if she had to go to she would have peed her top, not her pants. -Be careful what you want.-

Églantine found Seventeen to be right, but she wasn't convinced that leaving that person hanging like that was legal.

-Untie her, before she dies.-

-Oh, no. I'd need a pail to hook to her chin, so if she...-

Églantine, who was fifty-one, was a little disturbed.

-You're terrible! Just untie her.-

/

Back at the Crozier cowshed, the morning proceeded slowly.

"Damn grey fleece. All the other breeds calve in the cold, but not them. "

Carly examined the two cows: the one that was still spinning bellowed faintly, the other had the calf practically already her hind legs. An intern took care of the first while Carly bent over the most imminent birth: she crouched in the suffocating straw and with one gloved hand helped the first calf to be born, repositioning it in the mother's womb.

Leni had come to keep her company,

-They shouldn't have called you. And you should have declined, you're not paid for this.-

-That's okay.-

The manager smiled with her as Carly pulled out the calf, soft, tender.

-You make it look easy. Is it easy?-

-No.-

Lately Carly didn't know what turn she wanted to make in her career.

Her veterinary job was very on the field, rewarding, but she liked studying too much: being in contact with zoologists had inspired her, the thought of dissecting cadavers didn't faze her.

Carly placed the calf close to its mother's udders and thought she would like to continue studying, perhaps getting a PhD. In any case, she had more urgent projects to attend to and would have to put that idea aside for a few years. She got ready to extract the second calf which was born quickly, with a powerful push.

Leni cheered, -You did it! GG, Carly.-

-Well, that was a bloody miracle.-

The twin birth that had so worried the Croziers and even the vets had been relatively smooth.

The student gave the new mother an affectionate pat. The cow stood up, releasing a warm, dark splash on Carly's white gown.

Leni pinched her nose and stifled a laugh, but was amazed at how calm her friend could be at that sight of guts, blood and excrement.

-...? Poop?-

Incredulous and horrified, Carly looked down at her gross lab coat.

She let the second calf start suckling, then quickly changed and looked at the dirty white gown on the ground; she sat against one wall of the cowshed, dry-heaving.

-Oh no…- her face twisted in disgust, she warned that she was going to be sick.

-Hold it!-

Leni struggled to find any empty bucket but didn't have time; Carly threw up those few sips of water that she had gulped down before reaching the mountain pasture; she stood for a minute with her head back and her eyes closed, panting with the effort, and then went on again; Leni held her long ponytail, of such a light orange it looked almost blond; she had focused on Carly's hair to give her some privacy.

-What a sight. I'm sorry, Leni.-

-You kept you cool even for too long; after a cow shits you, this is really the minimum.-

Louisa had also rushed in, -Oh, oh, poor thing! How pale you are...Do you need anything?-

Carly asked for Coke. Louisa ran to Mrs. Crozier's shop and returned with a bottle of orange soda (she thought it was equally useful).

A bloody-gloved intern approached, -You all right , Der Veer? Can you help me with Carina?-

Like a boxer ready to face a new round, Carly rinsed her mouth and returned to the ring; she looked at Leni out of the corner of her eye, changing her gloves and kneeling behind the other cow still in labour. She sent the intern to attend to a matter and took the HR director aside.

She had to do what needed to be done.

-Listen, Leni. I need to communicate to you a decision regarding my contract with the RNP and my career. Sooner or later I'll tell Louisa too.-

-Don't tell me you don't want to work with us anymore! -

Leni watched with apprehension Carly attending Carina while still struggling with malaise.

-You have to rectify my contract. Since my due date falls at the end of November, I won't start in January.-

-Which due date?-

The director was shocked, knowing in her heart that the semantics left no doubt, yet she made an effort to remain calm, -Are you pregnant?-

Carly nodded, still focused on Carina, -The doctor says he'll come out on the 30th; in practice, when he wants.-

"Or she... "

Leni could not help but notice that under the new clean white gown, Carly wore her shorts unbuttoned, to make room for a belly that was just beginning to round out.

A cold sweat lined Leni's forehead, in spite of the heat of the cowshed.

She grabbed her friend eagerly, -My god, my little Carly! How is it like, how are you feeling?-

-Not so great today.-

Carly had realised she got pregnant that afternoon in early March, the day of Lapis's birthday party; she had remembered she had been skipping periods only on the clover field day.

When she had had her gynaecological examination she was already ten weeks, two and a half months: she had already gone through a quarter of her pregnancy totally ignoring it.

Both she and the creature were fine, but Carly still worried about all her sushi nights.

She had felt disoriented and almost shocked by happiness. During all that time it hadn't been Carly, but Carly and her baby. Everything had changed.

She was stunned at how she could have overlooked it. In hindsight, it justified her sleepiness and salt cravings.

According to the Internet pregnancy was almost divine punishment, so Carly was surprised to see the weeks go by without her turning into some kind of invalid. But she thought it was always around the corner.

Leni thought back to a moment before, -Do you have any morning sickness?-

-I do today.-

Ever since Carly found out, she had expected to give up her normal diet, but she usually had no problem with what she ate.

She had expected to swell, but instead she had lost 3 kg. She had prepared herself to feel perpetually uncomfortable and to vomit more than twenty times a day as had happened to Lazuli, but she had learned from the doctor that poor Lazuli was only the other end of the spectrum.

Carly counted on the fingers of one hand the times it had happened to her, it was more likely when she smelled Lillian's gasoline or detergents. She might have heartburn, but it was mild and bearable.

Carly was in good health: it was as if that creature wanted to be there as quietly as possible, without making its mother suffer.

That morning had been a case in itself: what bad timing with the dirty gown, it had made Carly throw up at work. It was the most stereotypical thing she could do in her condition.

-What month are you?-

-Almost eleven weeks. The third month is about to end.-

Carly cleaned up the calf she had just extracted; she reached for a glass, but favoured the bottle of orange soda directly.

Out of nowhere Louisa broke into the conversation, making Carly's heart jump.

-Congratulations, Der Veer! Why didn't you tell me right away, now I regret calling you. The baby is the top ranger's, isn't it?-

-No, the of Holy Ghost,- Carly chuckled.

-Please, Louisa, don't shout it from the rooftops. Don't tell John either,- Leni ordered, sensing Carly's thoughts.

-I told you to be careful at Seventeen!- Leni stuttered, -blue eyes, long black hair, thug attitude...voilà, pregnant.-

Carly was not naive, she didn't appreciate being treated as such; she sighed, masking her annoyance with a half smile.

-Actually, you said he was exactly my type; and why are you accusing him? He's been my boyfriend for a long time and we both wanted a baby, we just didn't expect it so soon.-

-Your boyfriend for a long time?-

-Yeah. High school sweetheart.-

They had told anyone who had asked that they had taken a break; Carly had also told Leni that she was convinced that Lapis was dead. It all didn't add up, but Leni had stopped thinking about it.

Carly couldn't wait to tell her Lapis; she herself had found out late and had decided to wait the end of the infamous third month.

That was in fact the most delicate time, she wanted to avoid to tell Lapis something that would make him immensely happy, only to suffer a miscarriage. It was something that could happen to any woman.

-Moral of the story, Leni: this is what happens when you forget the pill twice in a row.-

During the weeks leading up to the four-leaf clovers Carly had continued taking the pill, still unaware that the one time she forgot it, combined with not taking it the next day because she was still drunk, was enough.

She patted her belly, which looked huge to Leni all of a sudden.

It had happened that Leni forgot the pill; she was amazed to see that her younger friend was so fertile.

Returning to Verny for some well-deserved rest, Carly thought about the reasons for her choice: she didn't want Lapis to be happy and hopeful for nothing. She knew what that baby meant to him, she could imagine it.

Maybe she was wrong to do so, Lillian had told her too; she wasn't having much faith in Lapis, assuming he couldn't handle any loss.

But it was still for a good purpose.

/

Thoughts of the author:

We recall a peremptory statement by Carly to Lillian, from chapter 17, "I don't shag rangers."

While writing that, in my mind I said "huahahah you'll see": now there is no denying that an exception has been made (and with nothing less than the top ranger.)

Églantine is right about Seventeen being a kid, but now he must grow. Now or never.

However let's acknowledge that he's improving on a human level, with his colleagues. If Églantine had asked him to join him two years earlier, he would have told her to f**k off...

Thank you, readers, for making it this far. This part is super important for me, giving my interpretation of 17's family. It's starting here, with his firstborn.