I can't believe The Yard bought me the stupid hat. -SH

I think it's quite funny. -JW

It's not funny. I know it was Anderson's and Donavon's doing, they were snickering at the back. -SH

Relax, Sherlock. They're just poking a bit of fun. -JW

It's childish. The hat isn't even mine, it's becoming my brand and I hate it. I hate the hat. I'm burning it. -SH

Doesn't mean that you've never worn it. There's loads of pictures of you in it now. -JW

John this is your fault, why'd you make me wear the hat. -SH

Social etiquette. It's the polite thing to do. -JW

No. You just wanted to see me suffer. -SH

That too. :) -JW

You're supposed to be on my side. -SH

I am on your side. It doesn't mean I can't still make fun of you. The hat is cute and silly anyways. -JW

I am neither cute nor silly. The hat is ridiculous. -SH

You're ridiculous. -JW

Why do people insist on giving me gifts? -SH

To thank you for your work. -JW

How does a hat, cuff links or a tie pin equate to me catching a serial killer? -SH

People are just being nice, they're grateful for what you do. -JW

The gifts are useless. -SH

I know that but just try to pretend to be grateful for them. -JW

I'll try, it's so tedious though. -SH

Boo-hoo, sorry people are giving you gifts. -JW

Goodbye John, I'm busy. -SH

No you're not, you're moping on the couch. -JW

Are you watching me? Where are you? -SH

I'm at Tesco. I just know you Sherlock. -JW

Can you pick up some red food colouring? -SH

Yeah sure. See you later then. -JW

See you. -SH