I really appreciate all your reviews and questions - thank you so much for reading and following my stories! I began a new one, too!
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing from the Naruto universe but I do have an imagination of my own. PLEASE REVIEW MY CHAPTERS! I will take advice and suggestions from my readers while continuing the story.
Thinking
Biju, etc. speaking
Biju, etc. thinking
Emphasis
"Why can't Tenzo-sensei just cage it?" Naruto asked through her headset. Tenzo and Kakashi sighed heavily.
"Code-names, Blondie: remember them," Kakashi scolded. "God of Silver out."
"Right, right… Why can't Woodman just use his jutsu to cage the little fucker? Blondie out. Oh wait, that's a perfect code-name for Tora-chan, ne: 'Little Fucker'?" Tenzo groaned loudly.
"Woodman to Blondie: this is a team task! I am not solely responsible for caging that little…"
"Woodman," Kakashi warned.
"Hai, hai, God of Silver-san. What's your position, Emo?" Tenzo replied.
"Approximately 30 meters East. Again, I do not appreciate my code-name," Sasuke began in a bored voice.
"I swear to Kami, Uchiha: if you keep staring at my breasts, I'll rip your balls off," Naruto replied bitterly, having suffered the most scratches and cuts from the three hours they'd been chasing this absolute monster of a cat - she had just about enough of both the little beast as well as her team. "Uhh, Blondie over." Why is that cat so focused on me?
"NARUTO! Don't talk to Sasuke-kun that way, you hussy!" Sakura yelled in vain before realizing her mistake. "Ano, Pinky over," she finished in a saccharine-sweet tone.
Before Sakura had even finished her call, Naruto responded heatedly. "Screw this - and you, too, Pinkie! Stop being so damn immature! Blondie to Teme: YOU deal with this. Your clan has a bunch of cat people after all, ne?!"
"Hn... No," Sasuke replied. Naruto began swearing - of course, she did, her superiors thought.
"Broody-san, I read in a book that she is correct. It is common knowledge that your clan has a special relationship to felines," Sai offered before getting serious. The cat had begun to lick itself. "Tits Ahoy's argument is sound…"
"I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!" Naruto had had enough! Dealing with that cat was worse than anything she'd ever had to go through with the formerly hate-filled Kurama! She had been so close to that little cat-terror, nearly within reach again, when Sai made that comment… Gah! Why didn't I agree to him calling me "Foxy"?! Sai was barely rescued by the two Jonin team commanders landing on the screeching blonde. Tenzo-sensei got off of her furious form first, and Naruto looked up at her captain. Why is he looking at me like that?!
Naruto licked her lips, before she felt her lips part, feeling something strange - her heart racing. Kakashi just stared at her blankly before finally moving away from her. She closed her eyes and steadied herself. Here, in front of everyone - plus in front of that fucking cat? This was not where she needed to rediscover her sex drive. No, no, no… Why is my life so messed up?!
"Blondie to Woodman and Silver - she breathed heavily, trying to stop the heat that was taking over her… "Silver-God," she began.
"God of Silver, idiot," Sakura responded heatedly. Naruto walked away clumsily and threw herself into the nearby wildflowers, Sai began to make a humming noise. He was close to her, his hand on his chin, observing the village's biggest menace outside Orochimaru - meaning Tora, not her. She looked back at the cat, seeing its legs spread as it continued to lick itself. She didn't trust the thing to stay in place, though, no way!
"I read in a book that pleasure elicited through licking one's…" Sakura screamed so loud at Sai that Naruto rolled over and ripped out her earpiece, moving it to the other ear as she rubbed the first. Sai must have just continued, although Naruto thanked the gods that she had missed part of his observations. "... Pinky-san, it is my belief that anyone would lick their own sex provided they had the flexibility." Naruto looked up in absolute disbelief, seeing Sakura stare at the cat with what had to be the most perverted growing grin she'd ever seen outside of Jiraiya. She noticed that Sasuke was rather green as Sai tapped his mouth and continued. Oh, and Tenzo was now on the ground; Kakashi was behind her somewhere. "Blondie-san," Sai turned to her. "You could do such a thing easily with your clones, ne?" She swore she heard a "Ping" sound behind her and looked behind her to see her husband giving the thumbs up to the guy. Naru put her face in the grass.
"I hate my team…" she whined to herself repeatedly. It was all picked up on the team members' headphones.
"Maa, maa, Naru-chan… So mean," Kakashi responded, having gotten himself under control after seeing that look in his wife's eyes earlier - not to mention a very interesting vision thanks to the ROOT kid. Gods, I am disgusting.
"Team 7: withdraw to me and regroup," Tenzo ordered. Tenzo noticed that Uzumaki-chan and Kakashi-senpai were giving each other heated looks before avoiding each other's eyes. Really? Tenzo thought. Senpai should have realized that Uzumaki-chan, of all people, would become completely unglued at this of all missions. Occasionally even ANBU got the Tora mission when the lower-level shinobi were completely tied-up. Aside from notable seduction-assassination missions, depending upon who one asked, finding and "apprehending" Tora was the worst mission in the village! The Tora mission always took so long and there was so, so much wrong with that animal.
Tenzo had heard that the Shodaime had tried to rid the then-new village of the same menace, and didn't doubt it one bit.
"TENZO-sensei," Uzumaki began as the blonde looked up at him, "permission to obtain catnip from the Uchiha stronghold?"
"How DARE you, Dobe! I KNEW that It- -… that THAT man had," Sasuke began, his Killing Intent flaring - making the cat run away.
"You... Bastard!" Naru glared at the Uchiha before wiping the sweat from her brow. "Now she's gone! I already told you twice - once on paper, and once outside of the memorial that your brother…" She shook her head and made an inscrutable sound. Why would Naruto even try to explain again? (As much as she could without committing treason - considering her idiotic JiJi's lack of actions.) "Whatever: you won't listen to reason! You are the fucking worst Uch…" She found herself once again against Kakashi's strong, broad chest - his hand over her mouth. Does he know? Oh, if he did, she'd kick his ass! No matter what, Itachi was a TRUE hero to the Leaf - just as much as her father and father-in-law had been!
Kakashi watched as his wife's eyes turned purple in her fury. He began to lift his headband only to see her turn away and pout - that mouth of hers doing a number on him. He closed his eyes and scolded his perversions, something he'd never even thought of doing before he married her. Looking at her seriously, she seemed to be under control now - it was a wonder, considering this mission with THIS, of all teams - as she finally looked back at him sheepishly. She relaxed into his arms TOO MUCH, he eventually realized. He softly growled into her ear huskily - making her sunshin across the field of flowers. She was still within sight but glared at him. Kakashi bared his teeth under his mask at her - and damn it all, he could tell she knew. She again disappeared in a sunshin.
"Senpai," Tenzo said worriedly. Kakashi ignored his kohai and summoned part of his pack, first asking Pakkun to bring back Naru-chan. The pug nodded and darted away. Kakashi regarded his team but was pissed. He really didn't understand what was going on, both within himself and with his wife - or what his wife had to do with anything. This is not like me! This was a mission! Missions were the one thing he never failed anymore, not after Rin-chan… Even if it is that fucking cat.
"You know, kitty-chan," Kakashi turned his head so fast at hearing his wife's voice again that his neck cracked. His little blonde wife continued, "Matatabi isn't NEARLY as rude as you. Just saying... Ne?" He watched as Naruto looked at Tora with an inquisitive eyebrow raised as if she expected the damn cat to answer. Who is this "Matatabi?"
There was a definite pause in the cat's actions, as it looked at her with an intelligent expression. Naruto's teammates were silent as she stood up straight, lifting her head as she continued to give the cat a significant look. Seconds passed. Naruto finally walked toward the cat slowly, eventually holding out her hands.
Tora sprayed her. "You menace! I will disembowel you, you little shit," Naruto screamed as she threw multiple senbon.
Explosions of insane proportions reigned throughout the area, considering they were attached to senbon! How did she even know how to create such large explosions from such a small weapon, Tenzo wondered. Oh right, she's an Uzumaki. No wonder their clan was gone: explosion-obsessed maniacs!
"Troublesome. Oh, and shadow-possession complete. Look what we returned to…"
Naruto whipped her long blonde hair around without thinking. Tora had caused her to lose her hairband hours ago. She saw her dirty, very tired brother following his team. "Shika!" She ran toward him and he held her back with his shadows, reminding her of how badly her cat urine-soaked clothes and hair smelled. "We were - we were tasked with that… that DEMON!" Naruto told him.
"Watch what you call her, ne Naru-chan? You stink!" Shikamaru asked with enjoyment peppering his every word - especially as he saw her angry pout. She glared at him, noticing that this time HE wasn't wearing their communication earrings. "We just got back." He looked at Naruto's team with tired eyes, seeing Sakura look between the two of them in what was either relief or hope. He yawned openly. Shikamaru figured that this time, (just as in his last life,) the former medic-nin still thought "her Sasuke-kun" had the hots for his imouto, which was ridiculous! He looked up to see Naruto look at him as she gave him rather significant glances at the Uchiha and Sakura. He could only sigh before seeing Hatake glaring at him again. Honest to Gods: what an idiot!
"Ne, Shika: this is Sai-kun," Naruto introduced her brother to the man she still hoped would hit it off with his teammate. She immediately noticed the Nara tense and then glare at the midriff-baring weirdo and now-known pervert - and then he glared at her as well. It wasn't like Shikamaru strongly disliked her last teammate at the end of their past lives - it was just that he was very protective of his Yamanaka teammate. Naruto knew that if she hadn't been dropped so firmly into his life this time around, that he would think of Ino-chan as his one and only sister. She looked toward Ino and hung her head at the mere thought of it.
Shikamaru shook his head: Naruto's so easy to read! He gave her a wink to assure her, but that only made the Hatake let out something like a growl or rumble. At least this time Kakashi was trying to look away. He let out a chuckle as Naruto's eyes lit up with amusement and surprise. Shika looked over at the Hatake, who now seemed to be chewing something, probably his cheek - at least he could see his mask slightly moving. Hilarious!
"Shame on me, Shika-kun, Ino-chan, Choji-kun!" The latter two had just walked up to the group. "This is Tenzo-sensei - along with our team's captain, Kakashi-taicho," Naru said as she pointed each man out with an open hand. Considering Ino and Sakura had already begun ignoring everyone else and were already at each other's throats over Sasuke, Naruto winced. She looked toward where Sai had been, to introduce him as well, but saw that he was now gone. When she asked where he'd gone, Tenzo indicated with great awkwardness that the ROOT nin was relieving himself, making stiff, bizarre motions to indicate it. Naruto wondered why anything that had to do with one's "privates" seemed to stun the Mokuton user into stupidity, and shook her head at the silly man. Asuma finally approached and pried his team's kunoichi away from Sakura. Ino was now yelling at Naruto that she stank - as if I didn't know that, while Choji and Shikamaru nodded their heads in agreement. Asuma asked Kakashi to join them for lunch, and he agreed.
"Maa, my kuwaii genin have to turn in You-Know-Who, but I'll tag along," Kakashi said. She thought he gave her a wink - but he also gave one to Tenzo, too, making her sensei glower at him.
Asuma was holding his nose. "Better get on it then - can't let She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named continue to destroy lives," he joked. "Eww! Naru-hime: you stink!"
"No shit, Smokestack-sensei," she said quietly, more to the ground than to the bearded man who just smiled at her before walking away. Her sensitive nose was absolutely burning! "Permission to shower, sensei?" Naru gave Tenzo her best sad puppy-eyes, but he looked back at her with his Scary Face: that thing has to be a jutsu, a creepy one - making her run behind Shikamaru. Shikamaru was already holding his nose and glared at her.
No one would get near her as Team 7 continued to the Hokage Tower to turn in Tora-chan. Villagers were parting to let the smelly girl pass and Naruto died a bit inside, feeling she'd never been so embarrassed in her life.
"Not even when you farted to win that fight with Dog-Boy in the Chunin exams?"
Naru felt her blush take over her entire head and neck, not even hearing the Sandaime ordering her out of his office until Sakura yelled at her. She sunshinned back to the estate.
After scrubbing her entire body and hair until she felt a bit raw, she deemed that the cat urine smell had to be gone. Naru wrapped her chest and pulled on a pair of panties and black shorts. Knowing that Kakashi was at lunch with Team 10, she went down to the kitchen to further cool off and get something to eat. Leaning into the bottom of the fridge, she felt the back of one of her knees buckle a bit as something hit it softly. She spun around toward the threat and found Kakashi - way too close for comfort. He looked her up and down as she chastised him for scaring the life out of her.
"Hmmm, gotta work on your sensing, ne?" Kakashi watched her flush and wilt underneath his gaze: it was cute... and also hot, especially considering what she was wearing - or what she wasn't. He backed up to free her from their close proximity to one another and got out a cold bottle of water. Before she ran all the way upstairs, he stopped her. "Ne, Naru," she twirled around toward him from the stairs. "Maa, you… want to stay married?" Naru's eyes grew huge and her face burned red. He smirked at her under his mask, knowing her answer, but wanted to hear the words. Finally, she nodded her head. Good. "Say it," he ordered.
Naruto's eyes widened in shock. "What about you? Do you want to stay married?" She finally asked the question, but her husband seemed to glare at her a little behind that mask of his.
"Say it," he repeated softly.
Naruto looked away and tried to cover her fairly revealing figure as best she could. Finally, she nodded, flinching at the idea that he might not return her feelings on the matter. "I," she bit her bottom lip and looked away, before admitting the truth. "Yeah. I do want to… remain, ya know - married," she finished lamely. She finally looked back up towards her husband, hoping beyond hope that he would say the same, but watched as he walked out their front door. She hadn't seen him nod at her when she was looking down, but even if she had - would that nod have simply meant that he heard her, or that maybe he agreed to stay married, too?
She stood in the same place in shock after he had closed the door, thinking he'd just left her. Naruto might sometimes have confidence - especially in kicking ass - but when it came to relationships? Not so much. He left me. Her heart was beating hard and she felt sick. She felt Kurama stirring in her mind - for some reason he'd been quiet all day - but decided not to listen to his musings on her apparent non-relationship with her so-called husband.
But there was work to be done! She attempted to shake off her sadness off with determination, grabbed clothing, and left the house. The rest of the night would be spent painting fences with her nightmare of a team, and after that, she was going back to the Naras.
