Whether it was due to pride, fear, or anger, Draco did not return to the Slytherin dormitories. He had removed his belongings from the room he shared with Blaise, Theodore Nott, Crabbe and Goyle and shoved them unceremoniously into Eleanor's overcrowded greenhouse study.
Eleanor watched helplessly as he silently rearranged shelves of newly growing plants, Eleanor's decrepit desk, the cot, and now his oversized trunk.
"Is this rational?" Eleanor couldn't stop herself from asking while Draco tried yet another layout so that everything fit in the tiny room.
"Do you really need the desk in here?" Draco asked, not hearing - or refusing to acknowledge - her question.
"I mean, it is my office." Eleanor pointed out. Draco scoffed at this.
"Do you need a whole office? You're still welcome in your common room."
"So are you." Eleanor shot back. "You are the one isolating yourself, no one asked you to do this."
"You just don't understand." Draco muttered, beginning to push his large trunk around the wandbox sized room for what seemed like the millionth time.
"I do understand," Eleanor began to plead, "Draco, I know you must feel helpless right now, but I don't know if cutting off all of your friends will make everything better." Eleanor paused before adding. "Believe me, I've tried it. When everything was shitty and I was sad, I did the same thing. It doesn't help."
"That's not what I'm doing, Eleanor." Draco grunted. Eleanor rolled her eyes, his use of her full name giving her insight to the great annoyance he must have been feeling. "I'm choosing to not live with people who want my girlfriend dead. If Dumbledore isn't going to remove him from the castle, then I will remove myself."
"He isn't trying to kill me, if anything he would be trying to kill Harry." Eleanor tried to reason. "Voldemort won't want me dead until he gets access to my money, and we've made it really hard for that to happen. He was just trying to get a rise out of you."
"Why are you trying to convince me to go back?" Draco finally snapped. Eleanor sighed, she could see in his eyes that he was looking for a fight. Not with her specifically, but he had so much pent up anger and she was the closest person in the moment. Though she was proud, and hated backing down from conflict, she knew that arguing was not Draco's intention and definitely not what he needed.
"I guess I'm not," Eleanor said quietly, entering the threshold of the office and putting her hands on either side of Draco's face. "I just don't want you to be uncomfortable, or damage your relationship with your other friends."
"They've made their choice, they've sided with him." Draco was still huffing, but beginning to loosen up under Eleanor's gentle touch.
"Have they told you that?" Eleanor asked.
"They don't have to say it, I feel it." Draco seethed. "The way they look at me, the way they avoid me. It's been slowly happening all year, but after everything with Katie Bell, it was like I was alone there." He slumped down onto the cot, and Eleanor went with him, keeping her hand firmly wrapped around his. "Slytherins protect their own. Everyone says that their house is like their family, but with Slytherin that's especially true. It doesn't matter if they are 'right' or 'fair', if it's your family, you protect them. I didn't protect Blaise, at least not in the way they wanted. I'm a traitor."
"Draco," Eleanor's soft voice brought his eyes to hers, "there is a reason you did what you did. It isn't because you're a bad Slytherin. There are reasons behind the choices you made."
"Of course there is," Draco's words came out in almost a whisper, "I don't have a family anymore. At least not in the way I had one. Everything unraveled. All my life it was me and my parents and you and your parents and everything else just fell into place around us. Then you lost your parents because of what my father did, and then my mother had to leave. I lost almost everything in one full sweep, because of my father. My allegiances had to change because the biggest threat to my family was my father. Now, I just have you to protect."
"I'm flattered that you think I have that much of an influence over you," Eleanor chuckled quietly and kissed Draco's hand swiftly, "I think your reasoning is partly honest, but it wasn't just me. You saw a lot of flaws in what your family had always been loyal to. You stayed true to what you knew was right, rather than what everyone around you wanted you to believe."
"Sounds like a Gryffindor." Draco chuckled, nudging Eleanor's shoulder playfully.
"I don't think that's a bad thing."
"Of course you don't." Draco rubbed his tired eyes. "I guess since I'm a full blown turncoat now, might as well be a Gryffindor too."
"You're so dramatic." Eleanor rolled her eyes and gave Draco a soft peck on the cheek. "Now, I think if we move the cot to the back wall there will be plenty of room for your trunk and my desk."
Draco fell more in step with Eleanor's friends every day. He still rarely ate in the Great Hall, relying on Eleanor to deliver him food or Dobby to present him with something. Dobby rather enjoyed helping out Draco and Eleanor when he could, especially after Draco apologized profusely about the way he treated the House Elf in his youth and began gifting him trinkets whenever he saw him.
Hogwarts was lit aflame with wild gossip when Draco began sitting next to Harry, Ron, or Hermione in classes. Eleanor, only taking two classes in common with her friends, was often absent from the classes the other four shared, which made the phenomenon even stranger to the Hogwarts student body.
All eyes went immediately to Draco whenever Neville or Ron made a mistake in class. They were all waiting to see his snide remark, but he sat as still as a statue. A silent observer. Snape began sneering in the direction of Draco in the same way he did to Harry, Ron, and Hermione. In some ways, Draco felt more isolated than ever, and in others he felt very secure. Though he had struggled for the acceptance of Eleanor's friends, he never feared losing that support once he had it. He knew that despite how terrible he had been in the past, he had true friends now who wouldn't make him prove himself at every turn. Despite his parents being out of the picture, he knew that Sirius and Remus would protect him. He knew he was safe even if he didn't feel particularly comfortable. Eleanor always assured him that those feelings were just proof of him growing.
He didn't always feel like he was growing though. He often felt so stuck in his fear and anger that he was paralyzed. There were nights he couldn't sleep because all he could think about was Blaise. He would think about him with regret, sadness, and anger - always anger. He felt guilty that Blaise was forced into this role. Eleanor had been right, that was supposed to be him. If everything had worked the way Voldemort wanted, Draco and Eleanor would likely be his pawns in that moment. Draco felt responsible, like he should have been able to stop Blaise from falling trap to the back up plan. Draco felt anger at Blaise, Dumbledore, Voldemort, his father. Everyone. It burnt him up inside.
At the root of his anger was always fear. Fear for his life, and for Eleanor's. Fear of what was to come. Dumbledore was teaching Harry more and more each day and with every new revelation about Voldemort, the impending war felt like it was coming closer everyday. Draco often sat awake and wished that Eleanor was less proud, less courageous, less loyal. If she could be less of what she was, then perhaps she would be open to the idea of running.
Running and hiding seemed ideal to Draco. He wished to go live with his mother in Malibu, doing the mundane Muggle things, and never thinking for a second about how the Wizarding World was imploding. He would gather Eleanor up and take her away and he wouldn't think twice.
But that was always the difference between the two of them. Eleanor always commented on how he was a newly adopted Gryffindor, but he would never be brave enough to face injustice for the sake of facing it. He was brave enough to defend those he loved, his family. If Eleanor was choosing to face the world head on, to fight for what was right, he would have to stay and fight for her. They would do the same thing with entirely different motives for doing it.
"Malfoy," Harry whispered one late night of studying in the library. Draco was shaken from his thoughts and looked over at Harry. Hermione and Ron left earlier in the evening to complete their Prefect rounds, and Eleanor had fallen asleep on top of a mound of papers that Professor Sprout had given her to grade. "Have you ever heard of this spell?" Harry asked, sliding his potions textbook across the table. Draco rubbed his tired eyes quickly before focusing them on the scribble in the margins of the book.
"Sectumsempra," Draco read to himself quietly, "it says it's for enemies."
"That's why I haven't practiced it with anyone." Harry let out an unamused chuckle. "I asked Hermione about it, but she didn't know, I thought you might."
"I'm flattered that I'm the one you go to regarding all things Dark Magic, but I don't have an answer for you." Draco said. Harry's shoulders sagged slightly and returned his eyes to the book.
"Do you think it's really Dark Magic?" Harry asked in a low voice.
"Well, I don't think it's healing." Draco shot sarcastically, causing Harry to roll his eyes.
"Shut up, Malfoy." Harry brushed off and returned to reading his book.
"I never thought you would be a potions enthusiast." Draco observed. "You were always rather rubbish at it."
"I had a rubbish professor," Harry shot back without a second thought, his eyes never leaving the page.
"I don't really think that Slughorn is the height of academia, though, do you?"
"He really isn't as thick as everyone makes him out to be," Harry sighed, finally meeting Draco's eyes, "I am supposed to get some information from him, and each time I try he completely shuts me out."
"What kind of information?"
"A memory, between him and Tom Riddle. Dumbledore thinks it's the key to defeating him. Slughorn is embarrassed that he told him about a piece of dark magic so he altered his memory and I'm just trying to find out what that piece of dark magic was."
"Does it matter, isn't all of his magic dark? Why would one specific spell make a difference?"
"I don't know, I just trust Dumbledore."
Draco scoffed at his answer, earning a glare from Harry. "Okay, I know that you worship him and that he's the reason Gryffindor keeps winning the House Cup so you have to continue grovelling, but whenever I have told him about Death Eaters actually being inside the school, he hasn't given a damn about it. Makes it kind of hard for me to trust him." Draco sighed. "Maybe if you told him the same information he would believe it, but, I don't know."
"He knows what he is doing." Harry assured.
"Okay, well I hear Katie Bell is supposed to come back soon, so we can get a first person testimony to who cursed her and see if it lines up with what I said." Draco held onto his quiet anger for a few moments, looking away from Harry and glancing at Eleanor, eyes closed and breathing deeply. Her quill was held gently between her fingers, and some ink spots were drying on her sweater sleeves.
"No one is going to hurt her." Harry promised quietly, watching Draco watch Eleanor. "She's my family too. You aren't the only one who's worried.."
Draco blinked away the memories of Blaise hitting her, he tried to shake the guilt and anger he felt when he thought of that moment. But he couldn't be rid of it, it simmered inside of him. He knew it was nothing compared to what Blaise could do, what he might want to do.
If it came to that, Draco knew that he would protect Eleanor with everything he had.
Hope everyone is staying safe during this crazy time. Let me know what you think about this latest installment!
